Babylon 5 1. Secondary Obsessions

Author's note: Hey how's it going out there in TV land? This fan fic is based on the last episode of the fourth season of Babylon 5 called "The Deconstruction of Falling Stars". It takes place mainly about 500 years post Great-burn, but as it utilizes time travel there are a variety of deferent times. The characters Brother Michael, Brother Alwyn, Barbra Tashaki, and Delenn III are barrowed from the show. Sister Alanis, Sister Claire, Lady Ann, and Brother Forest etc. are of my own creation. Now I can't be curtain but I think there's something missing from the story so far, so ANY suggestion you my have will be helpful. I apologize if it's a little slow at first but it's necessary. To reacclimate you into the time period the first block is quoted from the episode "The Deconstruction of Falling Stars". Please don't forget to respond.

Disclaimer: How about this, the shows been off the air for almost a decade give or take and I still feel obligated to put up a disclaimer. Okay here we go. Babylon 5 was created by J. Michael Straczynski (ß quite a name huh?) and is the property of him and Warner Bros. I am not making any money; I'm just a fan playing in the world she loves. On with the show!

January 2, 3262

"Yes, but space is closed to us now," Brother Michael said, turning to one of the few windows in the monastery. A very common scene is being played out in Brother Alwyn's study once again. Brother Michael, a somewhat nervous and fidgety individual, yet again decides that tonight is just the precise time to have a "crises of faith" and peel the remaining bits of sanity out of Brother Alwyn's brain and patience. Pestering Brother Alwyn seemed to be becoming a nightly or at least weekly ritual.

"Just look at us, Brother Alwyn. And look at what Earth has become," he continued, peering out of the window into the harsh land beyond the monastery. The wind rose thick with dust that caught on the window pane and gathered around the edges like a grim snow storm. "Our cities are little more than villages. All those great secrets of our ancestors are almost gone."

"Almost," Brother Alwyn agreed, but then added consolingly, "That's why we're here. To find the ancient wisdoms and preserve them. Why, we've already found and restored so many books."

"Yes, but we are not one inch closer to-to those flying machines that the books talk about, or to the stars. And if the truth really does lie in the stars then how will we ever know the truth?" Brother Michael drew his gaze away from the window, away from the smoke coming from just over his field of view and walked to a table Brother Alwyn had in the middle of his study.

For some reason Brother Alwyn seemed to be unusually obsessed with Pre-Burn tech, when most people stayed away from it like it were a disease. It was difficult to find a place to put the large book in his arms down because of this. How much clutter can one table hold?

Brother Alwyn rested his eyes on the book with the same look of revered interest that the newest of recruits wore, and loss soon after. "Look, the others. The blessed Sheridan who lived and died and returned from the dead and was taken bodily into heaven. And Ivanova the strong and Delenn the wise. They could all be fables for all we know. You know the worst of it?"

"What?" he asked, a little more annoyance then he had intended bleeding through.

Brother Michael sat down beside him. "I was halfway through illuminating it when my heart just left me. You know the prophecies. The prophecies of Delenn III said that the Anla'shok, the Rangers would come again to the Earth in her greatest hour of need and rebuild what was once the cradle of Sheridan and the Alliance. And we have waited so, so long Brother Alwyn and they have never come. If that's a myth, then everything else could be a myth. And the whole of my life could just be a lie." Quite unexpectedly a deep sense of morning came up in his chest. It was the sense of a child's first thought that God might not be real.

"And if they do not come today, but come tomorrow is your life a lie then? I cannot help you, Brother Michael. That is what faith is for," he said, his voice coming down just a note as though he could sense just what Brother Michael was feeling. "Faith sustains us in the hour when reason tells us that we cannot continue, that the whole of our lives is without meaning."

"Then why where we born able to reason if reason's useless?"

"Not useless. But it's also not enough." He caught his tongue just briefly enough for Brother Michael not to notice and still give some thought to what he was trying to say. "Faith and reason are the shoes on your feet. You can travel further with both then you can with just one. If you must have reason for an answer, then consider this. If today the Rangers came back to Earth from their place in the heavens you would not know about it. They would come in secret and move around us and help us and we wouldn't even know they were here because the secret that they bring is feared by people who still blame science for the Great Burn."

"Then you think the Rangers are here today?" he asked.

"I believe they could be." Wait. What was that? Was he trying to say something? Brother Michael thought that he had detected something in Brother Alwyn's voice that beckoned him to read further then face value. "That's all that faith requires," he continued before he could think much further. "That we surrender ourselves to the possibility of hope. With that, I am content. And I believe you will be as well. It's beautiful work. Too lovely and significant for you to half-finish. Finish your illumination, Brother Michael." He got up and went to walk him the short distance to the door, the tone in his voice making it clear that no further discussion was to be had. "You've gone this far. It's too late to lose your faith now or my faith in you," he added, handing the book back to Michael.

"If the truth really is in the stars, Brother Alwyn," he added before he was pushed out of the room, "then just once, once before I die I really wish that I could walk amongst those stars."

"If there is a way Brother Michael I pray that your wish comes true."

He knew he really shouldn't, but he stayed there in the hall way and pressed his ear against the door. Brother Alwyn was talking again, it sounded like he was talking to someone in a very dry monotone voice. But this didn't mean anything everyone knew Brother Alwyn liked to talk to himself. And still he pressed his ear in just a little harder, something in that conversation made him want to press just a little further. He could almost make out the words, thought he heard his name, when Brother Alwyn stopped talking.

He removed his ear from the door and thought. No… he was just being silly.

March 7, 2376

"All right now that's enough! This is a simple, reasonable request. Now I have been shifted from person to person and negotiation to negotiation! I will not _tolerate _this any longer!"

"I'm sorry," said the nasally voice of the woman on the other side of the view screen. "That's all I can do."

"Listen to me. Don't you hang-you hung up on me."

"You know screaming won't help matters."

The girl that was formally shouting at a face on the wall jumped and turned in the speaker's way. "Lor! You startled me," she said. She almost never used Lor's true name.

Barbara Tashaki, a pretty 40 year old business woman smiled affectionately. "It's a habit," she said playfully. "Delenn, you are the great-great-granddaughter of the parents of the Alliance. Imagine what people would say if they saw you having an out right tantrum with a Presidential aid."

"They'd say, 'Now hear is a girl dedicated to her predecessor's memory. Poised, and refined, and _lethal_ to the taste.'" Delenn said this evenly and smooth as silk. She looked almost nothing like Delenn the first, but she spoke like her sometimes; elegant to the last. Being of mixed blood had betrayed her long ago. Taken from her the Bonecrest that she so envied in other Minbari. In its place was an intricate tattoo on a scared, bald head, perfectly emulating a female Religious cast Bonecrest. The only hair on her head was where humans had what is traditionally called bangs, half died purple of all colors. She braded them and placed them delicately behind her ears, more then half the length fell unbraded just below her bust. Dressed all in black, and always in a dress or skirt. She had soft, feminine features that made the boys she didn't notice fall at her feet.

"Besides," she went on, "she wasn't a presidential aid. Just an intern." She revolved on the spot for a moment with a long exasperated exhale, before setting to the center of the room where a circular purple coach sat and plopped herself down. "It's just frustrating is all. I'm sorry for alarming you."

"You didn't 'alarm' me Delenn. I've known you long enough for that to pass." She paused, uncertain she should continue with what was on her mind. "You know, you don't have to do this right now."

"Of course I do. I love her."

"Yes, I know but… you're still so young. You should be out there enjoying life instead of trying to create a memorial for your great-great-grandparents."

"Enjoying what exactly?" Her voice lulled away momentarily. She looked at the room around her. It was small compared to chambers on most other ships. But it resonated with the space and tranquility of the Minbari home world. Mostly it held to Minbari stile, triangular and crystalline, but the edges were softened with light white curtains and she owned a small but dignified collection of early Earth weaponry.

"There are far more people out there like her," she jabbed an aggravated thumb at the monitor, "then there will ever be of us. Politics, and scheming, and people out for no ones agenda but there own. They saturate the stars and pollute the spaces in between so that with every passing generation less and less good can grow. If I can carve out just a piece of unadulterated memory and reverence, maybe it can spread. Maybe it will remind people of where they've been, and where they must go. Maybe we can become again the galaxy Nana cherished. At the very least it might make this galaxy a little easier to live in." There was something in the way she spoke. Something that drifted effortlessly through the skin and into the soul. But Barbra seemed to be immune.

"You are so damn cynical. I know about all the scheming double crossers, I used to be one. You don't have enough experience to judge the whole galaxy. I don't even. All I'm saying is that you need a little more time under your belt. Perhaps you should go home and-" she stopped and cringed. She knew she'd said the wrong word.

"Home?" Delenn said menacingly. "Where may I ask? To Minbar where everywhere I turn I'm ridiculed even by the Religious cast, even by members of the Anla'shok. To Earth where even seclusion can't keep me away from the people that dog me for being a famous name leaching off heredity. Or better yet how about-"

"All right!" she said, putting her hands up in surrender. "I'm sorry."

"I'm not cynical, I'm truthful," she said pouting like a little girl. "And as far as my lack of life experience-" she lowered the threatening finger that had resin of its own will and bit her tongue. Her agitation was almost as bad as her grace.

"I know she practically raised you, Delenn, but really-why are you so obsessed with this?"

"It's personal," she said crossly. "And I'm not obsessed."

"Yeah that's what you always say."

"I just don't understand why they're so fervently against this. It isn't a difficult request. If they truly wanted to they could rebuild Babylon 5 in six months. And I'm not asking for anything nearly as difficult as that."

A small black human cat brushed against Barbra's ankles. She picked it up, scratched it, and went to sit next to Delenn with the cat lying contentedly on her lap. "Present diplomatic circumstances with Earth require them to make some concessions," she said in full political scholar mode. "Earth's opinion of your predecessors has been highly colored by the Telepath War. If the Alliance goes around Earth to set up this memorial it would embarrass them. The Alliance needs Earth's full support as one of the more powerful worlds, politically and strategically."

While she'd been talking Delenn had taken a small piece of plastic out from a pocket sewn from the inside of her skirt, and was now nibbling on the end of it. She always did that when she was thinking or nervous.

She shook her head vaguely. "The Alliance doesn't need Earth. What of Narn, and Minbar, and the Drazi, and Brakir, and so many others. The Alliance has proven itself with its loyal members time and again. Earth needs the Alliance more then the Alliance needs Earth. Besides Earth disserves to be embarrassed."

"You're probably right. But no one is going to take that risk. Delenn, this may not be possible in our time."

"No it is possible, it should be possible quite easily." She sighed uneasily. "No, there's something going on."

Barbra absentmindedly took up the control and pointed it at the monitor, directing it with her fingers to find ISN. Without considering Delenn snatched the control from Barbra's hands and shut it off just as the tell tail chime that herald the ten o'clock news sounded.

"I was going to watch that!"

"I don't like the news. It's depressing."

"Well of course it's depressing its news. Some of it isn't depressing it can actually be quite interesting."

"Like what?" she asked, her voice coming as close to a challenge as it ever did.

"Alright listen to this; six months ago the Vartok Home world reported something unusual around their nearest moon. Some sort of spatial anomaly they couldn't get a fix on. So the Alliance sent a team of scientists to take a look at it. Do you know what they found?"

She didn't even bother to feign interest. "What?"

"It had destroyed half a mile of the moon's surface. Poof, gone, vaporized not a trace of it was found. The team hasn't been able to get a lock on it for any length of time; it is so strong that it destroys their instruments. It's a complete mystery. They know only two things, it seems to be a fizzer in time space and even matter, that's why it's destroying everything it comes in contact with. And it's growing. They've had to evacuate the entire planet. It's a massive operation. My brothers even volunteered the experimental ship he's been developing. It's below decks right now, that's why we're being delayed to Earth."

Delenn was staring in the general direction of her bed, which was in the corner opposite the door, her eyes unfocused. If she didn't still have her bit of plastic in her mouth, Barbra would have sworn she'd gone completely catatonic.

"Oh come on Delenn you can at least pretend to be mildly fascinated."

"No," she said excitedly. "No that's it! That's why they're ignoring me!

"What's it?"

"They're using this planetary disaster as a smoke screen to ignore us. Think about it Lor. They can't listen to me, according to your theory, because Earth won't hear of it.  
But they can't openly ignore me without offending those loyal to the ideals of the Alliance. Lor they're hiding behind Vartok."

"You said it yourself Delenn, there aren't very many people that take you seriously. Not on Minbar, Earth, Centuri Prime, or any where else. You can't honestly believe that there's a conspiracy against us."

"No, no, no, no, no," she said in rapid succession. "Not a 'conspiracy'."

"Finally some logic."

"Just a load of cowards hanging behind a dyeing planet. And they're going to stay there until somebody forces them out."

Barbra threw up her hands in exasperated frustration. She resisted the urge to grab Delenn by the shoulders and shake her to make sure there really was a brain between those ears, and took to pacing the room.

"Because I'm so adamant in getting this memorial done I've become a nuisance they can't ignore and can't publicly scorn. So they hid."

Barbra pressed her fingers against her sinuses to try and prevent the head ach she felt coming on. It didn't work. "I… I… I… where the hell did _us_ go in this equation? Alright say that for the microscopic, insignificant, slightest of slight possibilities that you're right, what do you intend to do about it?"

"I'm going to press the issue."

"Ah."

"I'm going to Vartok."

"No!" she ordered, stopping dead in her tracks. "Absolutely not! That place has been quarantined except for official rescue ships."

"The President is bound to be there. He can't possibly ignore us if we're right in front of his face."

"Glade to see I've been ushered into this little goose hunt again. It is too dangerous. I forbid it!"

"I don't need a mother."

"No what you need is some good old fashioned shock therapy. You have absolutely no proof that this isn't one of your delusions." In the few seconds silence that fallowed she could hear her heart pounding against her chest. Of all the times they fought, no matter how much she didn't understand her, Barbra truly cared for Delenn. And right now she was terrified for her. She knew that her obsession for this goal had been growing steadily for the past few months, and there was a real chance she'd go threw with what she said. She looked back down into the face of her friend and her hard rapid heartbeat softened. She sat back down and drew a hand across her face maternally. "I know this is important to you, Delenn. I'm not going to pretend to know exactly why, or how much. But I know it's important to you. Having said that it isn't worth being imprisoned for assaulting the president, or worse."

Delenn eyed her with the expression of a scorned child. She and Barbra had developed an odd relationship since they'd first met nearly two years ago. A mix between constantly squabbling sisters, sergeant mother daughter, hard flung enemies, and the kind of bar tender that you tell everything but your deepest secrets to.

Barbra peered a little further at her. "How long has it been since you slept?"

"Oh I'm not getting into this again." She started to get up but Barbra had hold or her wrist and shoved her back down. "How long?" She sighed and rolled her eyes. "I don't know. Forty hours or so."

"Delenn you have to sleep. Why do you do this to yourself? Why do you stress yourself out during the day and then refuse to take the meds the doctor prescribed. I know you don't like chemicals very much but you can't live off five hours of sleep every two to three days."

Delenn wasn't listening. She was too busy turning over Barbra's words on the Vartok situation. Then something came across her. "What kind of ship?"

"What?"

"You said your brother has an experimental ship below decks. What kind of experimental ship?"

It took a moment for Barbra to regain herself after such an unexpected question. "Solar fusion."

"That's nothing new. People have been using solar energy since before space travel."

"Not buried under five kilometers of ionized rock. It's said to be able to stay berried for years and still be able to gather energy from the nearest stars solar radiation," she shook herself for a moment and caught back on her original train of thought. "Stop trying to change the subject. Get to bed."

"Huh. Oh, yeah, sure, in a little while," she said, vaguely registering the fact that Barbra had spoken to her and not knowing at all what she was agreeing to.

"No. Now."

For the first time she met eyes with Barbra, trying hard to hide the confusion in her. She always got so upset when she found that Delenn wasn't listening to her. Rescue came quickly fortunately, as at that moment Barbra pointed at the bed. Begrudgingly she conceded.

She lied awake in her bed hours and hours later. Her attentions focused on a single candle burning in the darkness, her eyes climbing up the flame as it turned gently from blue, to gray, to yellowish white. Her mind settled in the past; in one perfect moment of peace. A purple net surrounded her bed completely, shrouding her from the universe like a womb of her own making. And here, late at night, was the only place she felt safe anymore. It was the only place in the galaxy that she ever let the tears come out anymore. They fell every night she tried to sleep, every night without fail; comforting in there own small way. One by one they trickled down her face. One for every person she'd lost, one for every memory she didn't want.

She pulled herself into a ball as the last of the tears for the night fell, absorbing itself into the sheets, its companions into her knee. She knew what Lor would say if ever she told her of her nightly convulsive ritual. Which is why she never told her of the sadness that waited for her just behind the veil.

As a matter of fact, she was never really sad when she cried. Actually it was the only time that she wasn't. Here she could listen to her heart, the heart that was kept under lock and key at all other times. Here she could be free to be at peace… with herself and her thoughts.

She closed her eyes once, twice, sleep gradually catching up with her… 'You have absolutely no proof that this isn't one of your delusions,' she heard echoing softly in her head. There beyond the stars she saw it, her home… 'I'm going to Vartok.' It was just as she remembered it. The sent of the flowers on the air filling her… 'He can't ignore us if we're right in front of his face. What kind of experimental ship?' There she was, always so beautiful, always waiting behind her eyes. Her smile drew her in. the same way it did as a child. Her arms were open wide, beckoning her to rest in them… 'I don't need a mother! I'm going to Vartok-going to Vartok.'

Delenn sat up in her bed, breathing heavily, her words and her half sleep state sharp in her mind yet slipping fast, like water through cupped hands. Her mind raced in a hundred different directions and congealed in one spot. "The _hell_ if I'm going to stay here."


	2. The Burden of Memory

March 7, 3262

The kingdom of fools. That's what the holy books called this place. It always struck Brother Michael how anyone could possibly fall at the word of people who called the world "the Kingdom of Fools". No he shouldn't think things like that. At least not with such little daylight left. Why couldn't these thoughts ever stop?

He lifted his roughly whittled wood pen, the tip filled with embossing gold ink. It was a beautiful book. People always said that his was the best work in the Monastery. Sometimes he wondered whether that was the only reason they kept him around. He didn't listen well, he seemed to be perpetually nervous, when taken on excavating expeditions he constantly pelted Brother Alwyn with questions, which was considered highly improper. At least that's what everyone said.

The sun was slowly dieing beneath the mountains, bathing the east facing room in orange light. This was Brother Michael's favorite time of day. The ever burning candles melted perfectly into the color of the sun, so that no shadows fell, even in the darkest of corners. The hard wood floors, the only wood floors for miles in any direction, seemed to breathe once again with life.

The Monastery Del La Rosa had been blessed with one of the most beautiful illuminating rooms. Fogged glass windows so that the monks didn't have to watch the chocked sky as they worked, but could get the most of what was left of sunlight. Three of the four walls housed the three long wood tables kept deliriously clean. They all were mounted into the concrete walls, not an easy feet. Candelabras of different shapes and sizes scattered around the room, giving needed heat as well as light. There was one book shelf to the right of the wall behind him and a door to the left. Most of the books were in a separate library, almost all of them had been recovered and some were so deteriorated that they couldn't be picked up without crumbling. They had every holy book they could get their hands on, The Bible, The Reckoning, The Koran, even a collection of Ancient Greek myths to name but a few.

The whole room was simple, peaceful, the kind of place one could loose their thoughts in. Aside from the garden, this was Brother Michael's favorite place, and he was often to be found working late into the night. No one ever disturbed him. At least, not usually.

He turned in his seat, highly confused. He heard hurried footsteps coming toward the door, then, seconds later the door sprang open as though it were spring loaded. His mouth slid down without him noticing as he saw the last person he thought he'd see. It was Brother Forest, a relatively new member that, as far as Brother Michael knew, was so green he'd only been assigned to scrubbing the floors and toilets. What on earth could he possibly have to say that was so important?

"Brother Michael!" he gasped between mouth fools of air.

"Yes. Yes what is it?"

"Brother Alwyn has been waiting for you for a half hour already."

"Wa-Waiting. Why? Why-why is he waiting?" he asked nervously.

"The Sister of Victoria," he replied as if this were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Sisters?" Brother Michael took a step back from himself and thought. "Sisters."

"Yes, from Victoria."

"Sisters of-oh nuts."

Brother Michael bolted from the room with poor Brother Forest still talking to him. How could he have been so stupid? Within five minutes, less then a quarter the time it would have taken other wise, he was skidding to a halt in the main hall. Brother Alwyn, of course, was already there looking quite scandalized. "Brother Michel it's good of you to join me finally."

"I am so terribly sorry, Brother Alwyn. I didn't know the day was Thursday. It was a grievous mistake."

"Yes well, no harm done I suppose." He took one last quizzical look at Brother Michael's slight disheveled ness and added in an undertone, "Yet."

The Sisters of Victoria were a parish of nuns that resided just south of the Coventina Village. Only two weeks ago they came across something quite extraordinary.

Three times every week a pair of sisters travel the distance to the river at the outskirts of the village. The terrain on the north side, where the village lies, is quite smooth and manageable for the people who live in Coventina. The church on the other hand had been built in the center of thick and sometimes jagged rocks to stay as close to what was left of nature as they could. At the same time a road was to be carved out of the rock to lead directly into the village. Money, unfortunately, ran out and the road was left to be finished by the church itself.

While out gathering water, the two sisters decided to try and find an easier path starting at the end of the half finished road. They got no more then fifteen minutes ahead when one of them fell straight through the rock. She would have died there had it not been for the most magnificent artifact ever recovered. It stretched up out of the earth in the center of an underground cave and she landed dead center on it.

The parish had never encountered such a thing. The largest Pre-Burn artifact ever recovered prier to that had been a pick up truck with the tires and seats melted clean off. It had served as a template for the extraordinary seven minute successful run time. That reconstruction had been preformed by non other then the Monastery Del La Rosa. For this reason the parish had found themselves sending their brightest to the monastery in hopes that they could help decipher exactly what they had found.

The tall thin metal doors started to open slowly inward. Both Michael and Alwyn straitened up a bit, their backs toward a larger then life statue of their savior-to-be Sheridan. Two women emerged out of the slight fog the night brings fallowed by three young handmaid like recruits, all dressed in long brown and flesh colored robs and under dresses, the three younger women with an added sheath of cloth covering their hair. Brother Alwyn was slightly surprised. Though the parish had specifically requested an informal greeting, he'd assumed that an event such as this would have warranted a larger group then the standard visiting party. Michael on the other hand was too preoccupied with not making a fool of himself to consider such obvious points.

Brother Alwyn stepped forward and smiled. "Lady Ann," she took his outstretched hand and stared kindly into his face, "It's been far too long."

She was much older then the others. The wrinkles around her eyes and mouth gave off inherent warmth; a comfort and calm. "Brother Alwyn. It's good to see you again." She stepped back and gestured a hand at the woman closest to her. She gave her head the merest of nods. "This is Sister Alanis Hardwick. She was the first to come across the artifact."

Brother Michael thought Sister Alanis seemed to be almost as uncomfortable as he did. She held her hands tightly to herself and kept everything but her eyes, which darted over every surface of the stone passage, ridged. She had the look of someone that never let down, and he wondered whether she'd ever relaxed.

"I must first apologize for Sister Claire's absence. She unfortunately broke her leg in the fall and an infection had started to spread."

"Is she going to make it?" Brother Alwyn asked with genuine concern.

"We honestly don't know. She's in quite a state."

"Is there anything we can do?"

Her eyes momentarily darted to the statue of Sheridan above and said, "Pray." She sighed heavily, ridding herself of negative thoughts. "I know its late Brother Alwyn, but if you don't mind to much I'd like to talk with you about some of the more pressing issues before the official meeting tomorrow afternoon."

"Of course. Brother Michael, would you give Sister Alanis a quick look around and show her to her chambers?"

"Oh yeah." Alanis looked sharply, as though scorning him for such an informal answer. He stared quickly at the ground and mumbled, "Yes sir," to Alwyn's retreating back.

He allowed her to go ahead of him and mentally kicked himself in the ass for finding yet another way to make a fool of himself. This was going to be a long night.

March 7, 2376

Twenty seconds left. Delenn's hands flew over the computer panels in the cargo bay without her even having to think about it. She'd managed to disable the primary and secondary security systems with a few handy tricks she kept up her sleeve. And now she was bypassing the last door that stood between herself and that ship.

The image of Lor finding what she'd done when morning came swam into her mind, an irritating fly of the conscience. Fast as she could she shook it, forced it out of her mind. She'd spent the entire time between her quarters and the cargo bay looking over her shoulder, certain that at any moment someone would find and stop her. She couldn't allow that, the mere thought of it made the hairs on her neck stand strait up. And that was saying something considering she didn't have much hair. But no one at all had seen. The halls had been free of people at this retched hour. Still she couldn't help but feel that someone was watching.

Ten seconds. The blood in her veins swam with adrenalin, moving her mind and her body faster then she could ever hope to move on her own. Five seconds. Was that someone moving she heard? No it couldn't be. She cross connected the last of the operating monitors. 'Faster, Delenn.' The lock clicked. She'd done it! An insane amount of glee came over her so that she had to hold her breath to keep from laughing out loud. The doors slid open with two seconds to spare… and her heart froze.

Barbra stood no more then three inches in front of her. It took Delenn all of five seconds to move, but in that moment it seemed to take forever for Delenn to get her numb mind to work. The look on her dear friends face was that of the cruelest aggression and disappointment. It cut to her like a dagger. She had to think of something to say, some way to reason with Lor. But nothing in her mind worked. In the end it was instinct that won out.

Before she knew what she was doing she plowed passed her, threw her across the room. To the women, to the only person she'd never lay a finger on, she'd just pushed to the ground. Lor grabbed her by the shoulders and shoved her into the now locked doors with such a force that it knocked the air out of her. Her body seemed to be beyond her control. She forced her off her by jabbing her hard in the stomach with her knee. Lor sputtered and Delenn made a run for it. If she could go fast enough she could make it to the ship. But no sooner had the thought crossed her mind then she felt Lor knock her off her feet. She struggled against her vainly, but Lor's knee cut so deeply into her chest it made it impossible for her to breath. "Delenn, stop!" Lor pleaded.

Her body went limp beneath the pressure and she cried, "No!" in a terrible cracked voice. The fight was over. She'd lost. Involuntarily she shouted low and incoherent, sounding very similar to a trapped squirrel.

Slowly Barbra got up off her and crawled a few inches backward. Hand clasped to her mouth she watched as Delenn struggled to catch her breath, and struggled harder still to keep from losing control of her self.

"Why?" Barbra asked desperately. "Why would you risk your life for _this_ of all things?"

Delenn had stopped breathing hard. She lied on the ground like an exposed infant, cold, and naked. Her sweating face was pressed against the metal, half to cool her burning skin, and half to hide the growing shame from Barbra. She didn't speak. She couldn't speak.

"I don't understand you, Delenn. Every time I think I get you you do something stooped or irrational that doesn't fit. I don't know why I stay with you any longer. I don't know why I let you talk me into this and I'm about ready to give up. So if you have an idea in that fucked up head of yours about why I put up with you by all means let me know."

She just lied there, part of her hoping beyond hope that she'd walk threw those doors and she'd never have to see her again. And the other half wanted nothing more then to rush to her, cling to her until all thought of leaving her ceased. At that moment she truly couldn't tell which was stronger.

Barbra stood up holding her breath for an answer, any answer. One word from her and she'd stay, she'd listen, she'd care for her the way that Barbra owed and the way that Delenn needed. But no such word came. "Fine." She walked off to the door.

Her footsteps echoed off the walls and just as she reached the panel that accepted the security codes one side willed out. "It's because… It's because you want to make up for what you were."

Barbra's hand stayed suspended in midair. It hurt her to hear those words, as true as they were. She didn't know what to say or do next, the air was so thick she could taste the energy upon it, so she said nothing.

"You are my best friend, Lor."

"Then why were you trying to steel my brother's ship?"

"I have to get to Vartok."

"WHY?" Delenn jumped as though Lor had just smacked her across the face. "Why is this so damn important to you?"

"Just let me go." Delenn whispered.

"Not a chance in hell. I have granted you a lot of leeway, Delenn, and it ends here. You are not boarding that ship and you are going no where near Vartok."

No one would ever know how hard it was for her to say the words on her lips, but she couldn't stay, not when she was so close. She lifted herself off the floor. Her mouth opened and closed several times before she found a place to start. "You told me that you used to be one of the 'scheming double crossers' that reside in this universe. What happened to change that?"

Barbra let out a swift half sigh, half giggle. It struck her suddenly that they'd never talked directly about that moment. She seemed to inherently know why and when already. "It… when I was twenty eight I think-yes fourteen years ago by now, I was a scholar. I was commenting on Delenn, the first Delenn, and her husband. Well, commenting it was more like bashing. I was so convinced of my own damn superiority."

"And? What happened?"

"We, myself and two other scholars, had just started to comment on the fact that the Alliance was perpetuating lies that she was still alive. At that time she hadn't been seen in years, everyone thought she was dead. But then we heard something. Bells, and then an alarm. No it was the alarm then the bells, yes that was it. Anyways… she'd gotten passed the security and she stood there and said, 'John Sheridan was a good man.' That doesn't sound like much except that we had said some pretty horrible things about him. We all were so bloated with are pieced together knowledge. We wouldn't hear any of it. She saw right threw us, pegged us down flat without even trying. After all that time that was all she had to say. So much power radiating off her and that was all she had to say, that her husband was a good, kind, and descent man. And she went to leave and one of us said, 'Of course, we'd expect you to say that.'

"She looked at each of us in turn and… I couldn't look at her. I couldn't hold her gaze, none of us could. Never in my life had I felt that I'd wronged someone. Not with any amount of rebuttal could my confidence be swayed. In the brief moment before I looked away, she tore me into pieces. And I knew exactly how horrible I was; how detrimental the lies I was spreading were. From that moment on I couldn't… I couldn't-"

"Stay the way you were?"

"Yes." Barbra tried to say more but she couldn't. She stood in aw of her power and presence as though she were standing right there in front of her again.

Delenn got slowly up off the floor, her legs week beneath her, but steady. She was about to tell Lor that which she had never told anyone before. "With one brief look, Nana changed you," she began coming just that much closer to her with each word. "Just a look is all it took and you felt so connected that you've spent the rest of your life since trying to do right by her."

She was now face to face with Lor, their noses no more then an inch apart. Delenn could feel Lor's breath on her skin. She took her friends hands in hers and continued, "You know that from the age of two to the age of eight I was raised by her. But with that you don't know the half of it. Far few people do.

"When I was eight I came into Nana's room. She lied there surrounded by her friends and aids and prepared to leave this life. She held me as though I were her only link left to life, and the moment that she let go, she'd die. She had only one thing left to do. You know full well that the degradation of the history that they built together was well underway. She knew that if she didn't do something to stop it everything that she'd worked for would die along with her.

"It wasn't her decision. If it weren't for her closest aids she'd have never considered such a thing. Especially for someone so young. But it was the only way."

"What? What decision?"

"She gave me the only thing she had left to give. She gave me her memories. All of them." A silence so deep it could have swallowed a rocket engine roar filled the air in the room. Delenn couldn't quite dissect the look on Lor's face. Shock, disbelief, horror, almost everything you could feel encapsulated in one sweet face. "You were permanently changed and connected to her by one look. Can you imagine what a lifetime can do?"

"Why you? Surely someone like her could have found anyone to take on her memories."

"She could have," Delenn agreed. "Except that she couldn't have. The transfer had to be with a blood relative. And also someone, if only mildly, telepathic. My mother was a telepath. And as I have come to find, I think she was eager to give me the strength I would need to live without her. I must see this done. For me as much as for her. Dose that answer your question? Dose that give you insight into me?"

For what ever reason, perhaps the knowledge that she was so close to the one they called a living legend, she found she couldn't look up into Delenn's eyes. She tried so desperately to find another question a reason for her to say no, to tell her off like a child. But nothing came. To her relief it was Delenn that began to speak again.

"Even before the transfer, Nana and I shared one fatal flaw. We cannot simply stand by and watch as innocent things are destroyed. Even if it has nothing to do with me, even if I'm in no position to help I will force myself into a position to help. I cannot ideally watch as my family's name and honor are slaughtered. I think perhaps she counted on that. Don't make me fail her now."

Lor found that she'd been holding her breath for a while now. She exhaled purposefully and wondered as she made her decision, whether she would ever see Delenn alive again. Before her face a long thin gray rod appeared and she handed it to Delenn.

"What is this?" she asked lightly as she took it.

"A communicator. It's linked directly to the ship. Just in case you get into trouble."

"What ever makes you think I'd get into trouble?" she said, and threw herself against Lor's chest in a tight hug. She tried to absorb all Lor's emotions, to spare her having to feel them, just as Delenn had done on her death bed with a frightened little girl. Again, it didn't work. She held her tighter still, and then without the slightest inclination to look back Delenn let go heading for the ship.

March 7, 3262

He never would have believed it but he'd actually found a way to make walking around his beloved monastery the duty from Hell! His initial impression of Sister Alanis was of a quiet, nervous, shy individual. At first that seemed almost correct. She was deathly polite and seemed to think over every word before she said it. But very quickly he found that she was the sternest, most unyielding religious fanatic he'd ever met. He'd managed to stick his foot in his mouth almost immediately by commenting on a relief depicting Ivanova the Strong. He said that it was unusually convenient that she, as the only prominent female figure in the Reckoning, aside form Delenn the Wise, was almost always depicted with Anla'shok Cole. And almost as soon as Cole's death she disappears from the pages of the Reckoning. As though her importance was being deliberately down played.

She immediately asked him harshly if he was a conspiracy monger, and went on to say that people who insisted on questioning the word of the people that rebuilt their world shouldn't be allowed into religious service and waste the governments time and money.

But there was only one place left, the garden. And as he never missed an opportunity to visit he almost gleefully opened the greenhouse door.

The smell of damp earth filled him with a sense of well being. Nothing edible grew anymore except in a carefully tended greenhouse. The sky was simply too cold, the dirt too dead. Rows and rows of raised beds filled with green stood before them. Brother Michael navigated threw the plants with the expression of a proud father.

"I did most of this myself."

"Impressive," she said, the first complement that had come out of her mouth since they started their tore. She eyed the common legumes and roots one by one, lentils, pintos, kidney, and black beans, carrots, potatoes, then, "Wait a minute. Are those-"

"-tomatoes. Yeah." He ran his fingers over the slightly spiny leafs.

She stared covetously at it, showing for once something other then pompousness. "I haven't seen a tomato in _years_. Alive or otherwise."

"Go ahead. Take one."

"Oh I couldn't possibly. That belongs to you and the members of this monastery. How could I live with myself knowing I'd stolen from the mouth of my companions?"

There it goes again. He tried to ignore the spearhead of annoyance that was growing inside him and tried to move on with his first opportunity for reasonable conversation. "If you think that's something wait 'till you see this."

He wound her threw the maze of beds to the very back corner of the greenhouse, were no one looked. He stopped and presented her with his most prized plant. A curious sent filled the air, sweet and yet, what was it, bitter? No. The plant had dark green leafs and long thick steams with thorns on them. At the very top of almost all the steams were brilliantly red flowers. She'd never seen anything like it.

"What is it?" she asked in aw.

"It's a rose," he said in barley more then a whisper.

"Rose." She studied the plant carefully, took in every thorn, every petal. Then she asked, "What sort of fruit dose it grow?"

"No fruit. It's a plant of pure beauty. One of the last known to exist. There used to be billions of them all over the world, fields where they grew them to be purchased. People used to give them to one and other to make them feel special. Now their almost gone."

Sister Alanis' expression had turned from shock to dismay with every word Brother Michael said. "That is against policy. No plant is to be grown in the greenhouses but those that bare food. Dose Brother Alwyn know about this?"

"Um… um," 'Lie,' he thought to himself, 'Lie damn you, lie. For once in your life grow balls and lie!' "No. I-I mean yes. I mean-this is a part of history. This is a piece of the world the holy books talk about. It is… proof that we… we're still alive."

"It is a waste of agricultural space." She crossed her arms and bore into him. "You really are a piece of work aren't you? You obviously question the basic principals of the very system you serve. You disregard the rules for your own personal gains. And what's worse, you're disrespecting the very government that keeps you alive."

That one slapped him just hard enough to step out and stand up for himself. "Rome has refused to recognize us. They support nothing."

"Oh," she said lightly and apologetically. "Then how my I ask dose the Del La Rosa get its money? This is the most lavish monastery I've seen; tomatoes, a library with books no one has heard of, _wood _even. I refuse to believe that Rome isn't supporting you. Your logic is flawed. Is there anything you do properly?"

Brother Michael managed to mumble something that sounded like, "Ahhblummum."

"Ah, stumble, got it. Now if you please I'd like to be shown to my room so I can wash my hands of this nonsense." And she took off without another word.

Brother Michael stood in her wake, something very disturbing in his mind. How _did_ the monastery get its money?


	3. Intrigue,Ecstasy, and Horor

Author's Note: I'd just like to say thank you to Amethyste for reveiwing my story. A story, no matter how good, bad, or indifferent, would go to wast without someone to read it. I'd also like to report a knew, one-chapter-only character, Carl. I would very much like to punch him in the face too.

March 8, 3262

If only she could remember things a little better. Alanis had woken up not too long ago having to pee. And now she was _completely lost_. None of these halls looked familiar. She'd passed something that looked like the dinning hall but she couldn't be certain, everything looked different in the dark. This was beginning to aggravate her.

She turned left and ran into a dead end. She turned right and found herself on the other side of the courtyard. Well, at least she knew where the courtyard was, but where had she gone after coming into the courtyard? She chose the hallway closest to her, figuring it couldn't get her anymore lost then she already was.

Oh wrong she was. _Nothing_ looked remotely familiar. But there was a familiar sound, Lady Anne's Voice. She fallowed it like a blind man groping his way out of the darkness.

Lady Anne was whispering. She knew she shouldn't, knew that if someone went to any length to keep things secret she should respect that. But curiosity got the better of her and she inched closer to get a better ear.

"I know you've been able to operate like this for years. But please listen to me Alwyn. Rome isn't stupid, they are going to find out. The whispers going about from what Sister Alanis and Claire found-"

"That has nothing to do with us."

"Somehow I don't think so."

"Even _if_ the artifact was somehow connected Rome hasn't received a full report of the findings. There is no reason for them to suspect anything."

"Since when did the government have to have a reason to be suspicious? You've been behind these walls too long, Alwyn. You don't know what it's like out there anymore. You don't know what people will do. If any of this comes out-"

"Shhh-did you hear something?"

She'd shifted a small statue on a pedestal trying to get closer. She swung herself around it and crouched down into the shadows.

She heard feet coming closer and made herself as small as possible. If she were seen it would surely be the end of her life in the parish. The feet came into her field of vision, coming closer with every heartbeat. They stopped a mere half inch in front of her, so close she was surprised that Brother Alwyn couldn't feel her breath move the outer layer of his robs. She felt eyes scanning the corridor.

'He's going to see me I know it," she thought to herself. But his gaze relented, his feet backed away, the door closed with a snap, and she exhaled.

March 8, 2376

"Oh what am I doing? What am I doing? What the _hell_ am I doing?" Delenn asked out loud. She was now crammed behind the helm of a tiny closet like cockpit with artificial gravity that wouldn't work with shit.

For the past half hour since she'd left the jumpgate the closer she got to Vartok the more the little ship vibrated and jumped off course. She figured they were some sort of gravitational eddies but she couldn't read them. And it was getting harder and harder to control the ship on manual. At this point it would prove to be an out right miracle if she got there in one piece.

"I'll tell you what you're doing. You're acting out a lifetime of fanaticism that you're not going to be satisfied with until it kills you."

Lights and buzzers flashed as yet another system went off line. She was about to shut them off and ask the computer for a systems report for the umpteenth time since she'd jumped in here when a shower of bright white sparks shot over her. She ducked just in time to stop from singing the back of her neck. "Shit!" she yelled at the small fire behind her.

Fumbling, she managed to get the straps holding her to the chair off and put out the fire with a small extinguisher. She investigated the ruble which turned out to be thruster control. Until she got it back online she couldn't turn. "This is going to take forever."

Just then yet another alarm sounded. A proximity alert. The blast had gone clean out threw the hall. The emergency bulkheads had already sealed the breach but the pressure knocked her straight into the gravity pull of a stray commit. Her heart jumped into her throat and she climbed out of her chair in a panic.

Her heart hammered against her chest faster then she thought was possible, and sweat beaded off her brow. She tried every trick every code combination she could think of but nothing worked. Thruster control was simply dead. Her breath came sharp and constricted. Her whole body seemed to be shutting down in the abject fear of death.

The computer sounded, "Hull temperature increasing. Collision eminent."

A small portal started glowing white hot. If she didn't do something now she was gone. She literally growled at the chard mass of wires and metal as she tried harder still to make it work short of tearing it apart. But everything she did simply seemed to make things worse. Damn it she should be able to do this with two lifetimes experience with crises. "Help me." She whispered to the abyss.

All the noises around her dropped away as she plummeted toward the commit. She didn't even hear herself as she said, "I can't die here."

Somewhere, perhaps in her own head she heard a firm yet distant voice say, "Now."

With that her surroundings came flooding back into her senses. Roars and vibration overwhelmed her senses and she did the only thing that instinct would allow. She kicked the consol with all her might. The moment her foot hit the panel the ship spinned out of control and slammed her against the wall.

The inertial dampeners kicked in and she was able to peel herself off the wall and peer through the portal she'd been glued to. The commit came in and out of view like the spot on a light house getting smaller and smaller each time it came into view.

She slid down to the floor and laughed hysterically. "Oh I hate you. What were you thinking hijacking a ship?" She burred her face in her hands in the greatest sense of euphoria she'd ever felt and again laughed at herself with a jovial, "Who ever said violence doesn't solve anything?"

Rubbing her neck she pulled herself up off the floor and asked for a systems report. "Thrusters down, life support at 40, emergency power off line, manual control off line, waste recycling systems-"

"All right I get the point. Estimated time to reestablish thruster control?"

"Two hours forty-five minutes standard time."

With that she rolled up her sleeves and dug in. As it turned out after an hour there wasn't much to do except wait as the computer reestablished links with the soft ware.

She sat in front of the main consol, feeling unusually tired after her adrenalin rush. She yearned for her bed on the Patara. Even yearned to hear Lor bagger her for not sleeping. Lor had been her best friend for two years, and now she didn't know if she'd ever see her again. The thought of their last encounter being their last moments together sent a chill down her heart.

It was quite amazing, she thought as she floated aimlessly across the stars, exactly how much Lor had come to mean to her after their first meeting.

It wasn't until much later that Delenn learned exactly how much Lor had been "warned" about her; about her hot temper and two-facedness. Carl, the captain of the ship at that time walked her to her new comrade's quarters making her ever more nervous as she went.

"It's alright you'll be fine," he said to an already agitated Barbra. He stopped just short of Delenn's door and added yet another warning, "Just don't talk about her parents." He walked only a few passes further and said, "Or ask her anything about her childhood." He walked half a pas further then said, "And don't stare at her head." Barbra just had time to wonder how the hell she was supposed to look at her without staring at her head and why that should matter anyway when he spoke again, "In fact it would be best not to speak of anything but business."

After all that, Barbra was fervently expecting to see a hard-ass woman filled with tattoos and starring down the barrel of a gun she was cleaning. She was there for almost knocked off her feet with surprise when the door opened to a highly feminine looking girl in the middle of the room… DANCING! Yep-there she was dancing like a maniac to old fashioned rock music, her back to the door and bare foot in a light black cotton dress. Barbra saw immediately what Carl had meant by "don't stare at her head". She was completely bald and her head was littered with very prominent scars that probably went down the back of her neck. She couldn't be certain of course because she was wearing a high collar.

They watched her for a moment. She flayed her arms and shook her hips to the beat of an early 21st century song. "… with an angel face and a taste for suicidal…"

"Ah-hum!" Carl announced himself.

Delenn jumped about six inches and turned faster then a centrifuge. She clutched her hand to her chest and said baitedly. "You startled me!"

"I'm sorry, that wasn't my intention," was Barbra's first words to her.

"No of course not." She told the computer pause the program, and walked intentionally at Barbra. She stood just a little too close for comfort and gave her the strangest look, as though she were appraising a prized show dog. It made her feel quite uncomfortable, like she were a child and Delenn her superior. How silly such a feeling, but it made her look everywhere but at Delenn's face. Finally she backed up and said, "She'll do."

"I think maybe we should get to work." Barbra said hopefully.

"_Work_," she protested with a laugh turning elegantly on her heal by a dresser and covertly laying a picture down on it's face. Not quite covertly enough though. Barbra assumed that the picture was of an ex-boyfriend and couldn't quite understand why she'd want to hide him from her. "Now what's the fun in that?"

She looked uncertainly at Carl who was leaning against the wall with his arms folded. "Delenn, Barbra is here as a political consultant. You _need_ her help, our sponsors aren't going to wait much longer for results."

"It's ten o'clock in the morning Carl. Get a grip," she said in a voice that said quite clearly that she didn't want him around.

Barbra was getting nervous again. Carl didn't seem to be taking the hint and she didn't want to get on Delenn's bad side this early. At the very least not second hand.

It was there for with great relief that when Delenn spoke to her it was sweetly and with a hint of familiarity that she assumed was part of her many personalities. "Tea?"

"No. Thank you."

"Are you sure? It's rooibose, quite sweet."

"No, really. I'm fine."

She frowned slightly and said, "If you're going to work with me you're going to have to learn to lighten up." She crossed one arm against her chest supporting the other by the elbow. "What was your name again?"

"Barbra. Barbra Tashaki."

"Ahh," she said under her breath. She stared her down again, but this time she stood her ground, remembering for the first time since she walked though the door that she was at least twice her age. This seemed to please hr but when she spoke it was to say the most unexpected of things, "Your name sucks."

She left her there with her mouth slightly open. "We're going to have to fix that," she said as she went to poor herself another cup of tea.

Since Delenn seemed to be in no mood to work she decided to give a jab at being friendly. "So what was that you were listening to?"

"Greenday! One of my favorite bands, forget what ever time period they're from."

"Why would someone name themselves after a color?"

Carl snorted into his fist earning a reprehensible look from Delenn. "Because men seemed to have been left behind in the evolutionary jean pool. Even if they can sing."

"That's only because you've only met jerks in your life." Carl said with an annoyingly snide look.

"True."

He seemed to take Delenn's lake of overt disapproval to be a sign to continue. But Barbra could read very clearly that Delenn's shields were going up. "Why don't you ditch these zeros and try a hero on for size."

That made even Barbra nauseous. Delenn fix him with a stare that could cut glass. " '-amid the earnest woes that crowd around my earthly path. My soul at least a solace hath in dreams of thee, and therein knows an Eden of bland repose. And thus thy memory is to me like some enchanted far-off isle in some tumultuous sea. Some ocean throbbing far and free.' Something I am sure you will never understand. Let me know when you've found one."

Barbra knew in an instant that Carl was not someone to be crossed. But then neither was Delenn. "I should have expected that from someone that spent four years in a mental institution."

It was like watching a gun go off. Without the slightest change in expression and without warning of any kind Delenn punched Carl straight in the middle of the nose and sent him flying across half the room. He hit the wall and bounced at least an inch, blood already dribbling down his face.

Delenn walked slowly toward him, like a queen to her unfaithful. Barbra was almost curtain that she was about to wrap her hand around his throat. She didn't know exactly why she wasn't moving to stop her except that her legs wouldn't work worth anything.

When she reached him however, she simply pulled out a white cloth, handed it to him and said a politely as she could, "Leave now." To which he practically ran.

It stunned Barbra even more when Delenn turned toward her with the loveliest of smiles and said, "Well, I'll help you unpack," without the slightest hint of falsehood. She ordered the music to play and proceeded to dance around the room with her luggage in hand.

She caught herself falling asleep at the consol. "Damn you Lor how dare you be right." It had been a very _very_ long time since she'd started to fall asleep from exhaustion. Lor had jinxed her by telling her to sleep she just knew it.

She rubbed her burning eyes and jumped as the computer sounded its final systems report. "All systems back online. Life support at 90, artificial gravity at 50, 49, 52…"

"Got it. Thank you. Ascertain current position and reset a course to Vartok."

To her great surprise automatic systems weren't having a single problem, where as before she couldn't go more then tem meters without being tossed around like a ping pong ball. She scanned the surrounding space. How odd. The distortion seemed to be radiating out like a shock wave. She had never seen any sort of distortion act like that, in either life. It didn't do anything to improve her nerves.

The little ship inched its way closer to Vartok, a tiny star against the ebony of space. A beacon warning innocent ships to steer clear sounded and she shut it off before so much as a word came through. "I'm sorry. I'm having communications problems," she said to the nothingness in her most innocent childlike voice.

Several ships swung past her. The experimental ship was just small enough to run silent in the debris of another ship she supposed didn't make it through the turbulence. 'Oh great, a ship was destroyed by the turbulence. No, don't think about that, you have a job to do!' "Alright mister President. Come out come out where ever you are."

Something strange was happening she realized as she looked down at her consol. The ships were scattering, running in every which direction from the center of that… that disturbance. "Computer report." Silence. "Computer! Computer respond!" There was a moment of hushed silence then, WHAM.

It was as if a bomb had gone off in her face. She felt the skin on the right side of her face peal away to reveal burning, bleeding flesh, the pain of which was almost unbearable. A terrible strobe of white light filled the cockpit, nearly blinding and the ship threatened to fly apart.

Just as suddenly as it came it left. She found herself face down on the floor with no idea how she got there. A dull throb coursed through her body like a drum beat. It took all she had to pull herself back into her seat. A steady stream of blood caressed her face and she had to blink it out to see. The blast doors had opened of their own accord. But this didn't make any sense.

A brilliantly white organically flowing energy field flouted just in front of her. It was the single most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. It made everything still, and made every hurt melt from her body and her spirit. It was the feeling of looking into destiny it self. How long she sat starring at it she would never be able to tell, it could have been a millisecond, it could have been years. The only thing she knew was that the more she looked at it the more it felt like it was looking _back_ at her. Its face shimmered with blue and purple, a living breathing marble flouting in the cold of night. It drew her to touch it, to feel its pulse, to let it sigh healing into her.

Without thinking she found that her hand was pressed against the glass. It swelled suddenly and roared like a creature hunting its prey and all beauty was gone, replaced by only terror. The small ship lurched forward into the beast's jaws. Delenn had no time to react, no spirit left in her to even want to live; it had taken it from her already.

She threw herself backward in her seat and threw up her arms screaming.


	4. Of a Love so Pure

Author's note: Okay before you say it I know this chapter is rather short. This is why I've desided to put up two chapters this time instead of just one. I'd also like to say that beyond that which I already have written, perhaps a chapter and a half worths, I may not be continueing the story. Aparently people don't like fics without enough of the original charictors in them, at least that's what my sister said, and there is no point writting what people will not read. I am also writting an original romance story that I'd like to consintrate on.

March 8, 2376

It was quiet Barbra thought. It was never quiet when Delenn was around. Her thoughts were starting to confuse and disturb her. She missed her friend, she did, but-there was a _pull_ inside her. She kept finding herself thinking back to Delenn the first, to the years she spent trying to get close to her, to the moment she found she was dead. For so long she lived for the chase.

She was right, as horrible as that maybe. But at first, if only at first, she stayed with her only because she felt she owed Delenn. But she grew on her. Delenn made her feel needed. She loved her so much more then ever she obsessed over her great-great-grandmother.

But did that mean that she missed and feared for her friend, or the chase? Was all this worry and hurt caused by the absent safety net of obsession? She always thought that if only she had something to obsess over, then she'd be alright. But then why did she feel like a mother preparing to hear that her child was found dead?

Her musings were interrupted by a soundless presence behind her. Her brother, she knew it without even having to turn around. "Have you heard anything more?"

"No."

"Good. No news is good news," she said to the warm cat in her lap she just remembered was there. She'd been sitting there in the middle of Delenn's room for four hours now. She'd come there just after telling Ethan what had happened, expecting him to come in at any moment and scream at her for letting Delenn take his ship.

Ethan however knew just how much his sister cared for Delenn, even if she didn't know herself just now, and had been stuck searching for the words to comfort her. In the end he came to her and told her he'd be watching the news for information on her.

He came and sat beside her. The feel of another's skin was unwelcome and deeply comforting at the same time. She felt she was expected to say something, so she looked down at the cat and said the only thing she could think of, "Did you want to look after Camille? I can't be around cats too long they give me hives."

"Barbra," he said bracingly.

"I swear to you I will tear you apart if you tell me she's gone," she whispered.

"I said there was no news."

"You could have lied."

Ethan sighed heavily. "You have to know that the chances of her coming back alive-" he stopped, realizing that his voice was becoming angry.

A very long while passed before either of them said anything again. Barbra's head had some how slid onto Ethan's shoulder during the nameless minutes. What broke the silence was the most unlikely of sounds… she started laughing.

"What?" Ethan asked mildly alarmed.

"Do you remember when she tried to teach me something called 'The Macarena'? And I botched it horribly and ended up falling over backward and getting wedged between the desk and the wall?" She could hardly finish her sentence for laughter. Her brother shook too with the abject humiliation of the thing.

She enjoyed the laugh for everything that it was worth. Delenn had taught her that. " 'You are impossible my dear Lor.'"

"You see I never understood why she called you that." He took a few deep breaths to clear his aching lungs and then said, "I mean I knew it was a nickname, but from where?"

Barbra looked her brother in the eyes, a glimmer of the happiness she'd found with Delenn back in her face. She pointed at the dresser. "You see that picture?"

Ethan got up to grab it and handed it to his sister. The picture depicted two young girls arm in arm in a garden, no more then four years old. Delenn was one of them. She looked so happy. She had very long deep brown hair that shone in the sun. And she was wearing a lilac sun dress with small white flowers on it. The other girl was clearly Minbari. Only slightly taller then Delenn in a typical worker cast outfit and a soft Bonecrest that she rested against Delenn's temple.

"When she was growing up for the first few years she lived on Minbar, with her 'Nana' as she called her. That girl in the picture was her best friend. Lorakenn, a daughter of one of the families most trusted guards. She said they were the happiest times of her life. She said I reminded her of Lorakenn."

"That's lovely. But I don't think someone her age could say that her happiest times were behind her."

"I think she could," she said running a finger down the image of a young Delenn.

Ethan on the other hand was looking at the Minbari girl. "So what happened to her?"

"She died in a terrorist bombing of the Anla'shok headquarters when she was eight." Ethan was noticeably shocked by this, but it rolled threw Barbra like air. She knew at that moment for the first time just how much she missed Delenn. It struck her like a hand across the face and tied a knot in her stomach, but released the stones in her throat. She was grateful for it. "I want her back, Ethan," she said without a hint of desperation or sadness. "I want her back."

"Why did you let her go in the first place?" he asked before he could stop himself. "Why did you let her indulge this _stupid_ fantasy of hers? She's not a hero she's not a warrior, she's not an infiltrator, she's a _little girl_!"

A pit of regret and shame filled Ethan's stomach, Barbra starring at the wall stone faced. "It's personal," is all she said.

Ethan wriggled uncomfortably. "Maybe," he said uncertainly, "Maybe we should watch some TV… to take our mind off things."

The Vidscreen flipped on to the last channel it showed, ISN. The news caster was already speaking and Ethan was in no mood to listen. But before he could change the channel Barbra put her hand up and said, "Wait," having heard something.

"Once again the debris of a stray unregistered ship has been found in the vicinity of Vartok. It appears that the destruction of the ship has some how sealed the anomaly that was threatening to destroy the entire system. Rescue ships have been dispatched but it dose not appear that anyone could have survived the destruction of that ship…"


	5. A Phantom Prophit

Pain. That was all that registered in Delenn's mind. Her entire right side hurt as though she'd been dropped from a great height. But, if she was in pain then surely that meant she wasn't dead?

Her conciseness didn't want to reply, trapped in a loop of the momentary ecstasy she'd felt in the presence of that… _thing_. It would have been so easy to lie where ever she was and dream the rest of her life away.

Her arms and legs didn't want to move, her eyes didn't want to open. It was like being an infant flouting in space barley conscious of herself but knowing all the while that if she didn't find air she'd die.

She forced her eyes open with every bit of might she had. The image in front of her was blurred and didn't make sense. A rusted metal poll came into focus slowly. A ship. She'd been in a ship. Every thought she had came slowly and in chunks, she had to force each of them from the pit of her soul and back into her body.

Shaking… a terrible amount of shaking. Was the ship forced to crash? Was she in the middle of a pile of ruble? A comet, she was heading toward a commit thinking about… someone. Her memory ran backward faster and faster. Arguing, remembering, breathing hard, burning, Lor. "Lor," she tried to call out but not so much as a breath came out. "_Lor_!" and that time she heard her own voice.

She lifted herself off the ground quickly and waked her head hard on something metal. Eyes closed against the fresh pain and tearing she backed up dizzier then ever she'd been. A great wave of nausea overcame her and she breathed to steady her stomach.

When finally she opened her eyes again she found herself in a completely unfamiliar place. It was a room of some sort, very dark and cold. Almost everything in sight was concrete or rusting metal, and there were no windows. What looked like a locker stood before her roughly four inches taller then her. Where in Heaven's name was she?

She turned around and saw that the ting she'd rammed her head into was the side of a bed frame, she wasn't alone. A girl about her age slept in that bed, the thin filthy looking sheets coming up over her head and a single low burning candle on the floor beside her. Now that she saw it in its entirety the room looked quite small and depressing. The bed and the locker were the only pieces of furniture in there and the room itself was roughly the dimensions of a walk in closet. She wondered if maybe this was a prison.

Well there was only one way to find out now wasn't there? She grabbed the girl by the ankle and shook. Nothing. She shook again. Was the girl dead? No there was a pulse. Delenn moved up a bit and shook her shoulder, "Miss?" she said tentatively. Then louder, "Miss?" At last she showed signs of life.

There eyes met for all of half a second, sleep and incomprehension glazed over her face. She gasped harshly and fell straight out of bed in a crumpled heap of limbs and sheets. Delenn backed into the locker to keep from being flattened by the girl's fall.

She disentangled herself first from the blankets and then from the hair she was apparently chocking on. The wild expression on her face would have been hysterical if the situation were any different.

"Are you alright?"

In response she scrambled up and onto the bed. "How did you get in here?" she demanded. Delenn didn't answer. "If you intend on robbing me I'd have you know there are twenty people in this building not including my matron and assistants!"

"I don't intend to rob you."

"Why are you here? _Who_ are you?" she asked again, clutching her heart as though she were expecting it to explode.

"I don't know. I don't know how I got here. My ship was caught in an anomaly that the sensors couldn't read. There was a flash, a surge of some sort and then, I don't know I just woke up here. My name is Delenn." She looked around one more time and added, "Where is here?"

The girl looked at her as if she had three heads. "Ah-huh," she was able to mumble before starting to pass up and down starring at her as if she were going to attack at any moment. "Who are you?"

"Delenn Sheridan the third," she said slowly and uncertainly.

She put her head in one shaking hand. "One more time?" she said as if afraid to ask.

"_Delenn_. What is this place?"

She sat down, got up, sat down again half bent, got up again and passed some more. She was looking decisively green now.

"Are you alright?" she asked again.

She was mumbling to herself now her hand still glued to her head. Delenn started to wonder if she hadn't maybe ended up with someone a little unhinged. "Not possible," she was able to discern.

"Not possible what?"

She straightened herself up and said clearly, "I demand you tell me who you really are."

"Excuse me?"

"If you are looking for charity I shall give it. It is my duty and my privilege. But I will have you know you will receive nothing from me until I get the truth. Now tell me your name and your profession."

"My profession?"

"Yes. Are you a whore?"

"A _whore_?" she shouted wondering if she were propositioning her. "Look I don't know what you're talking about. All I want is to get back to my ship."

Nothing. In fact she might not even be breathing now. 'Oh great I killed her.'

"Hello," she clicked her fingers a couple of times, "stone woman. Are you still there?"

She let out a squeal that could have been a laugh had it not had a definite note of panic. She pointed her finger at her which quickly back to her forehead. Cardiac arrest in 5 4 3 2… "You are expecting me to believe that you are the third coming?"

"Excuse me?"

"Is that the only words you can say properly or something? No matter. So what dose that leave us? You are crazy, violent? Perhaps."

"Excuse me but-"

"Stay out of this." She stopped, realizing just how absurd that sounded.

There was a knock at the door, she shoved Delenn into the locker and shut the door, opened it and said, "Stay there," closed it, opened it again to grab a coat of some sort and shut it again. 'And I'm the one that's supposed to be crazy?'

She could hardly breath in there for the smell of the cloths. It was like nothing had been washed in at least three weeks. In fact she was sure it hadn't. She hushed her own thoughts. Someone was talking.

"How could-how could-I mean why?"

"Hello Brother Michael."

"Hi."

"So tell me are you going to spend the next half hour or so passing my room or are you going to tell me what you're talking about?"

"Rome has canceled the expedition. This could potentially be the biggest discovery of modern history and… and… and… they're canceling it! What are we going to do?"

"We will do nothing."

"Nothing? How can you say that? Sister Alanis, this is potentially the biggest discovery of modern history-"

"You've mentioned that."

"-and you're just going to sit down and… and let them?"

"I have no other choose. If the government doesn't want the site excavated then it won't be excavated."

"What are they hiding? What don't they want us to know? There are roomers that there's a site on the outskirts of Rome's jurisdiction that is kept completely sealed. You can't tell me you don't think they're hiding something. You were there at the site. You found it."

"Yes I did."

"And? What did you see? What was it like?"

"It was… big."

"And you're not in the least bit interested to find out what it was?"

"Of course I am but it isn't up to me to question or go up against the government."

"It is our responsibility to find the truth."

"To what end? Brother Michael don't do anything stupid."

"I was talking to Brother Alwyn a while ago and… I don't know there was something in his voice."

"I don't know where you're trying to get with this. And I don't want to know. You can't play revolutionary and be a servant of the state at the same time."

"You're just going to give up then?"

"It isn't my place. They decide I fallow, that's the way it is. I don't know how you've gotten by so far and not understand that basic principal. It's a disappointment yes, but a disappointment we have to live with. Now if you'll excuse me I have to prepare to leave."

There was a pause that said very clearly he didn't want to leave it at that. "I can't believe you," there was a snap that indicated a door closing.

Delenn was hit with the sudden impact of cool air though it was only moderately brighter then the inside of the locker. "Why did you put me in there?"

"Oh well let's see shall we? You're half dressed." She looked down at her mid-calf dress and knee-high stiletto boots and wounded what the hell she was talking about. "You're crazy-"

"I am not crazy!" she said slightly more threatening then she'd meant.

Alanis backed up looking a little frightened of her.

"Look, I'm sorry." She cast around for a subject to help calm her, "Who just came to see you? What was he talking about?" she asked trying to keep her voice level and kind. It appeared to work a little.

"There was an artifact that we found," she started, taking off her musty robs to reveal the comfortable looking set of light pants and a tank top that Delenn first saw her in. "It was pretty big, the find of a life time. But as you heard Brother Michael say the expedition's been called off. Odd though," she let slip, thinking about the conversation she'd overheard, "What?"

"Nothing," she said quickly a long dress going over her pants. "I don't grant that my matron will give you charity. Lady Anne has never shown much patience with-" her voice trailed off remembering that it was not a very good idea to call her crazy. "If you'll give me your real name Brother Alwyn, the head of this monastery, may be kind enough to grant you sanctuary for the time being."

"I've _told_ you my real name you twit."

"That will be enough," she said throwing her robs onto the bed. "You can't possibly hope to make anyone believe you're an ancient Prophet. I won't have you spreading lies! Until you reveal your true self to me you will not see another member of this monastery, visiting or other ways. I will help you as far as I can but as far as I'm concerned you are dangerous to other people."

"What are you talking about? I want to know what's going on here and then I want to take a bath because this whole place smells like a wet dog. Can you please stop talking like a Renaissance Reject long enough to-"

A slightly absurd thought crossed her mind and she asked before she could stop herself, "What year is it?"

"3262."

"Oh shit." She slid to the ground as her knees gave way beneath her. "The Alliance. I need to contact someone from the Alliance."

"The Alliance doesn't exist anymore," she said patronizingly.

"What about the Rangers, the Minbari? I need to talk to someone in the Grey Counsel!"

"Oh sure. Then we can contact Santa Clause and have the elves fly you home. What do you take me for? You're making all of this up as a meal ticket-" she ended on a gasped. Someone was at the door again.

Sister Alanis grabbed her robs quickly and shoved her into the locker again. "Come in."

"Oh no you don't." Delenn backed up as far as she could and kicked the door clean threw. She got out to see a very confused monk and a heap of musty cloths and hair on the other side of the room.

"You have to-" she felt a hand clamp onto her mouth, the heap had gotten up remarkably fast. She bit into one of Alanis' fingers and she yelped. There was a hard whack on the back of her head, "Hey."

"What is going on here?"

"Nothing."

"The Polar Express is about to take off, dear boy. Hop on we're going to see Santa!"

Delenn received another sharp whack in the back of the head. She grabbed Alanis' wrist hard and was about to tell her off before remembering that she was being watched and threw her hands behind her back. She put her most innocent and unconvincing smile.

The monk had gone pale and his mouth was open. It stroke Delenn then that a monkey could have been dancing a jig on top of his head and he would never notice he was so wrapped up in his confusion.

"What was it Brother?"

"Forest Ma'am. May I ask-"

"No you may not."

He looked back and forth from Delenn to Alanis. Alanis had her fingers crossed behind her back that he wouldn't ask anymore questions. Delenn was remarking how much they must look like the Three Stooges at the moment, except that they weren't all men.

"Um Brother Alwyn sent me to tell you that a storm is coming and you will not be able to leave for several days. You can come in for breakfast as soon as you're ready."

"Thank you Brother Forest."

He turned uncertainly to leave and Delenn added, "Yes thank you Monkey Boy." She loved the way that unsettled the dweeb.

The door closed and, "What did you say that for?"

"Couldn't help it. Well," she rubbed her hands together, "let's eat, I'm famished."

"You are not going anywhere. I meant what I said. I'll bring you back something."

She went to leave and Delenn stopped her with a, "If I tell you my name is Snuffalapagis would you let me go?"

The door closed in response. It opened a moment later and Sister Alanis asked, "Why didn't you tell him your story?"

"I figured if you were any indication…"

Almost as soon as she left the galley, with her extra bowl of food, she knew something was wrong. The looks on the faces of the people she passed was pained, nervous. She itched to know what was going on but knew better then to draw attention to herself. That would be a very bad idea.

It was therefore a great relief when Brother Alwyn called her over. "Tell me you've seen Brother Michael."

"He came into my room this morning," she said with surprise. It was only then that she remembered the food in her hands and she slowly pulled them behind her back.

"Anything more resent?"

"No I assumed he would be working by now. Brother Alwyn what's going on?"

"Michael is missing."


End file.

Babylon 5, Drama, Sci-Fi