Total Drama series Taking Charge

**Disclaimer: I don't own TD, it belongs to its rightful owners. **

**Happy Birthday I'll Cover Angel &amp; Collins. Hope your special day was awesome.**

**And Warning, characters are terribly OOC here, in the name of humor.**

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"Chris, where are you?!" Courtney screamed.

"Damn, Courtney," Chris grunted, "I'm right here. What the fuck do you want?"

Currently, Courtney had barged into the deluxe cabin where the winners were, during the All Star season.

"I demand that you arrest him," She pointed to Duncan.

Chris looked over at the crappy cabin and saw Duncan standing on the porch. "What, why?"

"He keeps peaking in on me and the other girls," Courtney shouted at him. "He said something about wanting to see my boobs squished in his face."

Chris laughed, "We have no rules about peeping toms."

Courtney snorted at him, "You should." She stomped on his foot.

"Yowel, fucking bitch, Chris growled. "If I were allowed, you would so be gone from here."

Even while Chris and Courtney were talking, Duncan was still peeking through the girls doorway. "Zoey take off the bra!"

He got an answer of a shoe to the face. "Get out pervert." Zoey yelled.

Duncan staggered back, smirking. "Yeah that's not going to stop me!" He walked back to come face to face with the door being shoved into his face.

"Fine, I'll sneak and look at the guys instead," He pouted. "Though I like curves not shooting missiles."

"As long as their effective and not defective," Mal snorted at him.

Duncan looked up at him, "What do you want?"

"I'm here for your services," Mal replied.

"What kind of services?" Duncan quirked his unibrow.

Mal just quirked an eyebrow, "What do you think?"

Duncan looked down and his shot wide open as he looked back up at Mal's smirk.

"Yeah!" Mal said, "Get in there!" Pointing to the guys side of the cabin.

"I uh...don't think I want to," Duncan said slowly backing away.

"I think you do," Mal corrected him.

"What about Al and Scott?" Duncan asked.

"Fuck em," Mal said, "Not literally of course. They can't join."

Duncan gulped as Mal grabbed his wrist and pulled him inside. Closing the door behind himself.

Chris laughed as Courtney looked back at the closed-door with a shocked expression. "Wha...what just happened?"

"Looks like we have some major editing to do," Chris smirked. "And I so want to air it on television."

A few second later the door reopened and Chrisney saw both Scott and Alejandro fly through the doorway and get a face full of dirt.

"This room is occupied for the night," Mal said to them. "Enter and you'll die." He then slammed the door shut. Before reopening it to place a sign on the handle that read 'Do Not Disturb!" Then slamming closed again.

Alejandro and Scott just exchange glances.

Chris was laughing as Courtney scoffed.

"Duncan's a pervert but he doesn't deserve to get butt molested by...by...him," He hands extended toward the cabin.

"I never said it couldn't happen!" Chris said, "No where in the contracts does it state that it can't happen."

"You can be sued for this!" Courtney smirked at him, "And I will be sure of it." She pulled a cell phone from her pocket.

"Hah!" Chris snorted, "No cell phone service out here."

"You would like to think I don't!" Courtney snorted back at him, showing him she had three bars on at the top.

Chris squinted and in fact she did have service. "You have service."

Courtney smacked him across the face. "Read the phone!"

Chris gulped. "So um, how would you like all access to the spa hotel. For the rest of the season."

"And..." Courtney said.

"A secret advantage in every challenge from here on til the finale?" Chris hoped.

"And..." Courtney continued.

Chris put a hand on his chin.

"The million dollar prize with a bonus of an amount of your choice, within reason," Chris hoped again.

"And?" Courtney quirked an eyebrow.

"What else do you fucking want?" Chris yelled griping the sides of his head.

"To lose something!" Courtney replied.

"What your fricking mind?" Chris glared.

"No!" Courtney told him sternly. "I want all that, definitely, except the losing my mind part. But there's something I need you for."

"What?" Chris asked.

"Losing my virginity!" Courtney crossed her arms.

Chris blinked once, twice, before looking at her. "Say that again."

"You heard me, McLean!" Courtney glared. "It's legal here in Canada."

Chris shook his head. "No way. Never."

Courtney smirked, "My lawyers are on speed dial, number 1 to be exact."

"Call them," Chris warned.

Courtney pressed the button and called her lawyers. "Hey Tom, uh yeah. We have a problem. Chr..."

Chris took the phone and smashed it on the ground.

"Fine, but you better not black mail me," Chris growled, leading her back to his room.

She smirked, "You're paying for a new cellphone to by the way."

**3 Hours Later**

Alejandro and Scott had to bunk in the forest.

Mal opened the door from the guys side and smirked as Duncan exited in only his boxers.

"That was fun," Mal said.

"You're not the one who got with a new sized asshole," Duncan growled, wincing in pain every few seconds.

"Well you sure made my time fun," Mal said, pushing Duncan off the porch, watching him land in a pile of leaves. "Especially when you play hard to get." He manically laughed as he reentered the cabin.

Duncan just sighed as he lay in the leaves. "Fuck, I hate my life."

He hears a door open. He turns to see Courtney exit.

She walks up to him.

"Where were you?" He asked.

"Getting even with my enemy, aka Chris," Courtney said, looking down at him, "Looks like you had a rough night."

"You can say that again!" Duncan said. Leaning up. "Mal's not just evil in the game that's for sure."

"And Chris's a lot more dim-witted than I thought," Courtney laughed, "He actually thought I had my cell phone with me."

Duncan was confused.

Courtney smirked at him, "Gotta love Sierra, the dimwit left her cell phone behind."

Duncan still confused, looked at her. "Mal broke it I thought."

"He did, but lets say Cameron's weak in the knees when it comes to peer pressure," She winked at him before walking back into her cabin.

Duncan looked around for what would happen next. "This is one screw up night. Everyone's acting unlike themselves."

"Duncan," Mal said, coming out of the cabin. "Time for round 2."

"Oh boy," Duncan winced.

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**Again (kind of late) b-day ICAAC. Make all your wishes come true.**


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Total Drama series, Fantasy, Humor