Probably it was because the pressures of unfailingly getting articles to print by the deadline was too heavy. Moreover, I was never very sure of my own direction or what I wanted. I was constantly starting and stopping, and always felt there was not enough personal growth or spiritual satisfaction.
大概是寫稿工作，限期交出成績的壓力和焦慮非常重；而且，我一直不太確定自己的性向和需求，一路走走停停的，始終覺得成長上的滿足、精神上的滿足不夠。