Small wonder, then, that some women's rights activists see both the wife and the mistress as playing a role in destroying a marriage. They even see interlopers helping to save marriages in some instances by providing temporary respite for the spouse involved in an affair.
無怪乎部分女權論者認為大老婆和第三者一樣扮演著「終結婚姻」的謀殺者角色；甚至認為有些第三者具有「婚姻潤滑劑」的功效，提供外遇者短暫放鬆的機會，從而保全了一樁不幸福的婚姻。