"You are a very powerful alien. But above that a wonderful strategist and excellent fighter on par with Carmelita. You could actually defeat her with my help. How would that feel? To have your own freedom again?" Tobi asked smiling.<br/><br/>(( If you had fixed most of the spelling errors it would have improved my favour for the story. Second what was Cerise's job. I know what he did forced him to keep him away from home but I never really understood what his job was. With him holstering his gun as he left and things<br/>I was a bit confused.<br/><br/>A third point is when Sai was yelling. That wall of capped text caused me to jump down a bit and skip it. If it had revealed what Cerise's job was then please dis regard my second comment. I know your trying to make emphasis on how angry Sai was, but maybe you could have put emphasis on a few words. Or stated that Sai loudly yelled at Cerise to get her point across.))