<span style="color: #ff0000">"but you didnt know when i did it. i knew people would find out that i had done it, i needed enough of a delay to make sure my body was completely eaten. Ras, i knew she cared about me, but she said she was too old and hurt to be in love and i accepted that."</span>she shook her head and sighed softly.<span style="color: #ff0000">"nothing about this whole thing is ok, and i dont know if it ever will be for me... i am hurt in ways i didnt know i could be hurt and its going to be a long time before i feel ok."</span><div class="messageTextEndMarker"> </div>