"Gentlemen!"<br/><br/>The response was as expected, lots of grumbling and dirty faces looking at each other in confusion. One or two pirates cheered and Rotter determined those to be the drunkest of them all, though in all fairness, he had recruited straight out of a pirate tavern so it was unsurprising that a general smell of cheap beer and whale fat polluted the air on his pooping deck.<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>"Cattle herders! Roughnecks! Freebooters! Pirates!"<br/><br/>The new crew started making more or less enthusiastic cheers of acknowledgement, though a fair deal - those most sober, Rotter imagined - still looked confused, and many started whispering into the ears of each other. Rotter let go of his crutch, Rum-skirts, and started limping about the deck in the most majestic manner his injuries allowed. He was a grand sight, he imagined, all four near-identical pirate coats swinging majestically in the fresh wind and the tricorn hat perched regally on top of the other tricorn hat.<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>"You are amongst the select few who gets to make a fortune and a legend for yourself while doing very little work. There is a reason the Flying Rotsman is the most famous ship to have ever plundered and pirated. We are unfettered in our assaults, and we have an effective pillaging success rate of a lot. Since we fly no earth or water-bound enemy can touch us and as such the Rotsman has never been defeated!"<br/><br/>Rotter maneuvered nimbly around a hole the deck, and he was quite proud of himself. He was improvising a speech and they were eating his lies.<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>"For this reason, those who crew aboard this proud vessel get a ton of booty in a very short time with a high life expectancy and I personally ensure the names of the fearless and the ruthless and the cunning get spread across the 15 seas. Fame and wealth, peons, and you pretty much just have to lay about, occasionally doing as you are told, get drunk and swab the deck and, I guess, do some riggings."<br/><br/>Now the crew was almost universally smiling, except for the odd crewmember or two who just scowled and wished to murder things. Rotter liked his psychopaths, but he really had enough in Wolf-Eyes Yagos. On the plus side, the most bloodthirsty sons-of-whores tended to die off quickly as they either started fights or foolishly jumped off the ship during raids while there were still enemies alive to be fought.<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>"That being said, the ship does need repairs, as you may have noticed. You'll need to redo the riggings on the mast we've lost, once you build a new mast. That alone is going to be tough work, but, you will be paid, and if you just want to repair the ship and not actually fight, then that's alright too. I will pay you for carpentry, but I will not name you pirates. I'll call you carpenters. However if you chose to be pirate carpenters, then that is even better. There are also a great many holes in the ship, so watch out for that. Those will need to be repaired. And I guess every single thing on the ship has been tossed around during the events that led to these injuries, so, you know, that'll have to be put back into place. There's really quite a lot of work to do on the Rotsman right now, so you all picked the wrong time to join me. On the plus side, it is safe labor. The only danger you are in is if you bump into me and don't immediately prostrate yourself on the floor or stab yourself in apology or something."<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>"You see, The Flying Rotsman cannot be touched under normal circumstances, it flies too high in the air for cannonballs and curse words to touch us, and this is the secret to my success. However, the ship and I are tied to each other. I am the Flying Rotsman. I walk, I talk and I have discovered I bleed, and the ship does not, but we are still connected. If  I am hurt, so is the ship. At the moment we fly low because I was shot, stabbed, drowned and my head was cut off by mutinous rats and buxom pirate queens, and our innate advantage has been partially negated. I am recovering and every day the Rotsman flies a little higher as I get stronger. I imagine the link works both ways, so as you rebuild my precious ship I, too, will get stronger and we'll fly higher. The end result is invincibility and with that comes glory, booty and lazy, rum-soaked days."<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>"So do not think of mutiny. We fly only so long as I am well. We'll only have a pleasant time so long as I am in good health, and should I die then this ship will fall and you'll be crushed to death or swimming alone in the water somewhere in the middle of the Atlantic. Normally I would demonstrate this by holding my breath and-"<br/><br/>"Hello? I'm looking for the Captain of this ship, the uh, The Flying Rotsman?"<br/>Someone had rudely interrupted his grand speech just as he was getting to the important bit where he told them not to kill him. He limped over to the side of the ship and looked down, squinting. On the dock quite far below was a tiny person, female, and seemingly willing to join his ship.<br/><br/>"Hello?" He responded. "I'm the captain. I wear two hats. I'm guessing you're looking for work."<br/>The little figure seemed to nod so Rotter went on.<br/>"We're currently looking for the most ferocious carpenters a pirate can find? Do you know anything about barge rafters and king studs?"<br/>The girl seemed to shake her head, but she was just a little too far away for Rotter to be sure.<br/>"Can you kill, rape and plunder? Because we're not big on the middle one on this ship, but if you are able to swing 200 feet down from a flying ship and plunge your sword into the gut of the Spanish king then that would be a really useful talent."<br/>She made a gesture that could have been anything. Maybe a shrug or a nod. Once again Rotter wished the Crow was here to tell him what was happening, but the Crow was dead and gone, having foolishly thrown himself off the side of the ship despite Rotter pleading with him to stay.<br/>"Oi... I have an idea. Can you see me? How many fingers am I holding up?"<br/>Rotter held up none, because he needed one hand to stabilize himself on account his injured leg, and he could not hold up the other one, since he had been shot in the collarbone and it hurt to hold up fingers.<br/>"What's your name, potential new-lookout?"<br/>It was difficult to hear anything over the wind, but he thought he heard "Raven" and his heart leapt with joy.<br/><br/>"Well, girl, you're not Crow, but I suppose a Raven in the crow's nest is still more appropriate than a Daniel. You're hired as the new lookout. The job entails looking out. Bring 'er up, men."<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>And the lashing restarted.<br/><br/>With a new crewmember Rotter repeated his speech, almost word for word, but with a lot more pauses in it as he had to stop to remember what he had said the first time. He eventually got to the point about not bumping into him, and then broke script and stared daggers at Dr. Aluca who was tied to one of the two remaining masts, naked from the waist up and being lashed into oblivion.<br/><br/>"This is normally a friendly ship where we are lax on discipline. We are not the royal British navy, where not saluting a superior officer is a whippable offense. If you just call me "cap'n" in your best piratey swagger and stay out of my private quarters you'll face few consequences for most anything on this ship, so long as you don't, you know, hurt or kill other crewmembers. Save your ferocity for combat and all that. Pranks are allowed though."<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>Rotter shook his head and returned on track to what he was saying. Just looking at the doctor turned Rotter red-faced. He would have shot him in the back as he walked away with that shit-eating grin on his face after knocking into Rotter, and the only reason he was alive to be lashed was that Rotter had spent the next minutes clenching his teeth in pain. It was difficult committing murder when your vision blurred.<br/>"This scurvy doctor's 'prentice knocked me on me right shoulder, in which the pirate queen Efer'd lodged a bullet ne three days ago and the bastard just walked 'way, laughin'. I'd be merc'ful  t'all o' ye that I did ne cut him into pieces and serve 'is carcass t'yer fer dinner, but I will if'n I get t'think an'one o' ye thinks that what he be done should be em'lated. He's onlae 'live now..."<br/>Rotter grimaced and calmed himself.<br/>"He's only alive now because it's bad luck to murder an old crewmember on the day the new one arrives. Nonetheless, he was drunk when it happened, and as a consequence I'm rationing the rum. For all of you. I enjoy seeing you all piss-faced and unconscious as much as the enemy captain's do, but I felt particularly devious as I came up with this punishment. There's only three cups of rum for any of you a day... but there is one more cup for the crew whenever Dr. Aluca suffers. I do not want him dead, because... well, I do want him dead, actually."<br/><span style="font-style: italic">Dead! Dead. Dead dead deadeadead!</span><br/><br/>"But this is more fun for everyone. Think of it as a team-building exercise: if you can make the whole crew laugh at the expense of the scurvy doctor then it's rum for everyone. I happen to find whippings extremely amusing, so whoever steps up now to whip the back off the doctor's apprentice wins rum for everyone. I will not have time to oversee this myself, since I wouldn't be caught dead spending time with you people below deck, so I'll appoint a quartermaster in charge of rum-distribution... ehm... let me see... Rum-skirts is my crutch, so she can't be rum-distributor."<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">Lash</span><br/><br/>"Alright, as a further fun little game, we'll do it this way: Whoever can drink the most gets the job of managing the rum and overseeing that doctor's apprentice Aluca gets humiliations galore. Or gets killed, there's a portion of rum in it, too, if he gets killed."<br/><span style="font-style: italic">Dead!</span><br/><br/>"Now, we sail, for Captain Tom Leumas and his Batallion of Dread Ghouls! Helmsman!" No one had been appointed helmsman. "Fly us to where Captain Tom Leumas is. Pirate carpenters, fix the ship as we fly. Whip-people, whip, and people who are really good at getting drunk, set up a rum-drinking tournament of some fashion to determine who is in charge of the rum. I want the biggest sod looking after and rationing it."<br/><br/>And with that Rotter took hold of his crutch and walked down into his cabin to look furiously for his missing piece of paper and failing to find it.