Not knowing what to say, Moony shook his head in a mindless response, barely comprehending what Sirius had said to him, the rejection still ringing in his ears.<br/>"I get it," Moony choked out. There was no bite to the answer, sounding deflated rather than upset. Moony's throat had knotted up to the point where it was hard to breathe, making his lungs burn and eyes sting, though tears had yet to form in his eyes.<br/>He had already turned away from Sirius when he continued, his hands shaking with strain when he finally did let go of the planks. "I should've understood."<br/>Moony had only moments ago relished in Sirius' undivided attention but now he could barely stand the fact that Sirius was looking at him. Moony had used Sirius as a mirror for years, having based his own sense of self in how Sirius perceived him. Suddenly, Moony no longer knew what Sirius saw looking at him, and it made his stomach turn, feeling like they had ceased to exist on the same plane of reality.<br/>"I should go," Moony muttered, having already shifted his posture far enough that he could stand himself back up. He had phrased it as if there was an alternative, but he was well aware of the fact that Sirius wouldn't ask him to stay. "I'm sorry."<br/>Once standing Moony didn't hesitate, not even long enough to send a last lingering gaze in Sirius direction. He saw no point in it, knowing he wouldn't survive seeing the pity in Sirius' expression. He climbed down the ladder with ease, hopping off it where the step had broken, but this time landing on his feet.<br/>Without looking back up, Moony shoved his hands into his pockets and went home.