Shadow felt his heart sink to bottom of his stomach as for a moment it seemed like Illia might reject the knife. He felt like an idiot, why would he give a woman who could channel a knife! what was he thinking? ... but then again what was he to do with her kerchief...howbeit she hadn't exactly offered it to him, he had sort of ... borrowed it.<br/><br/>When she laughed, Shadow brightened up and for a moment felt a little bit less emotional over the whole ordeal of her perhaps not coming back. Fighting he understood, but channelling... that was something he wouldn't ever understand and something he could not protect her from... he smiled a she put her hand on him.<br/><br/><br/><span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="text-decoration: underline">"I think, someday, I should like to bond you." Ilia said sheepishly. </span></span><br/><br/>Although Shadow couldn't imagine not being bonded to anyone but Illia, the way she out right said it did take him off guard... then again he felt a fool as Illia was not some local village girl, she was just a breath away from  becoming full Aes Sedai!<br/><br/><br/><span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="text-decoration: underline"><span style="font-style: italic">"Only if you want."</span></span></span><br/><br/>Shadow was at a lost for words, only if he wanted! He had trained years and years as recruit to become a warder!<br/>"I have been waiting years for some like you! I will do anything to prove myself!"  he insisted.<br/>Shadow blinked and then frowned, Moe? Moe?<br/><br/>"What! Moe!" Shadow blurted out! he felt a bit flustered and jealous now! then again, Moe did win the tournament!  "She can't take Moe!!" he exclaimed... and then he frowned as Illia was now staring into a glowing orb!<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic"><span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="text-decoration: underline">"Luna Sedai gave me a Sa'angreal." </span></span></span><br/><br/>"I don't care if she gave you a flipping unicorn and a dancing one eyed goat!" Shadow exclaimed.  "That little glowy thing isn't going to keep bandits away, or to keep you from getting lost... or... or... " he gasped. Shadow wanted to pull his hair out! "Moe!" he repeated. "You'll be lost, robbed and dead in a ditch or alley somewhere in a week! Moe belongs in a library, he has been wearing brown since he first day as recruit! he won't survive on some crazy quest! Who in the light is Luna anyway! she has to be the worst Aes Sedai I have ever heard off!"  he exclaimed... and then glanced downward feeling abashed... shocked out how fast and how many words he had gotten out... he had never had a rant before...sure he had thought them, but never spoken one out loud before.<br/><br/>This Aes Sedai known as Luna was trying to steal away Illia and his best friend on some sort of crazy quest! Shadow wanted to storm right up to her and give her a peace of his mind... but then frowned...IF...She was bonding Moe because he had won the tournament....panic flooded into him and he quickly grabbed hold of Illia by her shoulders!<br/><br/>"This was about the tournament isn't it!" he exclaimed "Oh light! oh light! I killed you and my best friend because of some stupid tournament!" he gasped and let her go and began pacing about! "What do I do? if I confess she'll want to bond me! and its only a matter of time Moe starts panicking and comes clean!" he groaned.<br/><br/>"Does she know it was me? you didn't tell her did you?" he gasped in horror and began glancing about in half expecting Luna to appear right around the corner at any moment!  He felt horrible that he was too much of a coward to come out and come clean that he gone against his will of his Cadre and the Amerlin Seat to save his friend.... but if that meant being taken from Illia...well he just couldn't lose her!<br/><br/>"IF she bonds me, I might never see you again at least not in the same way!" he panicked... he had met at least two love sick warders with sad stories of being taken away from their former sweethearts!<br/><br/>"Did you really mean what you said... that you wished to bond me?" he asked worriedly. "Isn't there some sort of channeling thingy spell, thing you can do to block anybody else from bonding me?" he pleaded.