Jason lifted his gaze to Martin. "No...she shouldn't have. I didn't let her. I am damaged goods. I am blind. I wasn't always unable to see at all. Before...before it was all dark and greys and shadows but I could see. Then..all that abuse. All that torture. All that raping and anguish of all kinds. She beat my sight away. I know it is gone for good. I know that I am beyond glad my babies do not have this same curse but...what I wouldn't give to have seen their faces...just one time. I have never seen them. Not really. I have never seen what they look like. I have never seen them smile. I know there is so much I would have seen had it not been for her. But...what does it matter? I don't even...remember who I was before her. I know there was a before her. A before the horrible after...I just...don't remember it." He said wit ha sigh.<br/><br/>He listened to the man as he spoke. Looking away. "She told me they made me a freak. That they would traumatize people who saw them." His cheeks still flushed as he spoke. "I want...to believe you. Really I do but all your kind words do is confuse me and make me afraid a little bit." He said honestly. He lifted his head a bit then frowned. "I do not need you to waste such precious thing as funds and medicine on me. It is enough to me that my children have the medicine they need. They are worth something. They have meaning. I am but damaged goods. I am worthless and meaningless. I am below dirt and I have no worth." He said as if reciting something that had been told to him over and over again and beaten into his head. He bit his lower lip.<br/><br/>He trembled a bit. "I need to make my babies their food. I need to." he protested. "No! No doctors! No! I will not! No!" He cried screamed out not in defiance but sheer and utter terror. Tears trailing down his cheeks as his breathing started to grow a bit raspy and quick. Whimpering and whining. "no...no...they never listen...no no they don't care. They don't care. They don't listen." He said. Holding his chest and his head. Tears trailing down his cheeks. He was trembling with fear. "They like chocolate chip pancakes. I do not need anything. Thank you for offering." He said. He was so used to not eating he didn't realize half the time that he had not eaten. He swayed a bit.<br/><br/>He smiled a bit. "Myxi loves lots of syrup and for some reason Luka will only eat his with chocolate syrup. I can not afford to eat...they need it more than me. It is more important that they get full." He said softly. It was not fully registering that it was not going to be like it had been. His head drooped as his body relaxed. "Maybe I am hungry...I can't remember. I can't remember when I last...ate." he said in an exhausted voice.