<span style="text-decoration: underline"><span style="font-weight: bold">"Of course not." Ilia replied</span></span><br/><br/>At that moment Shadow saw a definitely resounding serene look and tone of voice of a full Aes Sedai...he audibly gulped, he had hoped for answer it seemed assuring but it guaranteed nothing. He glanced at her ring nervous as she cupped his chin and dutifully dabbed him with the rag.<br/><br/><span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="text-decoration: underline">"I don't know why you'd think sparing Lan was a good idea though."</span></span><br/><br/>The comment about the idea with him sparing with Lan not being a good, caused him bristle sharply and he opened is mouth and then closed it again, there was no sense in trying to argo with a future white Aes Sedai... Cadre Coulin warned his recruits about every trying to hide anything from Aes Sedai...but he also warned them not to give answers they didn't want to hear especially when they already thought it true either.<br/><br/>He glanced downward again his eyes rising when she added,...* that he had held up his own...*   Shadow perked up he hadn't heard that bit... course his ears weren't ringing and he could actually think halfway straight now... well sort of...when she slicked back his hair to the tips of his ears burned red. Shadow was normally very good at keeping a straight face, but his ears....his dam ears always gave him away...for a moment he forgot all about the tower, and the Ajahs and cutting stabbing things with sharp object and all he saw was those brown eyes... richer, sweeter than wild dark brown honey...<br/><br/>It was then Shadow blinked and then glanced dumbly stared down at the rag she held out to him...<br/><br/><span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="text-decoration: underline">"For you hands." </span></span><br/><br/>Feeling a bit sheepish, Shadow quickly took it, Light he couldn't believe he was letting her wash him down like a child with a runny nose! He stared at the rag as he had forgotten how to use bloody thing.... when she mentioned his voice he glanced up worriedly and commenced to vigorously scrubbing his hands.<br/><br/>"I think I should like to hear more of it."<br/><br/>Shadow felt his throat go dry, shouldn't he be happen that he was able to speak...well he sort always new he could...it just...well for some reason he didn't there was just a something, something in the way...a horrible sense of impending doom if did speak... it was a bit childish imagination...but...well...the fear had been very real.<br/><br/><span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="text-decoration: underline"> "Is Shadow your real name?" </span></span><br/><br/>He blinked and then lowered his head, "it...was the name given to me," he replied in a reverently hushed voice, "I was rescued from Trolloc by the Green Ajah and their warders..." he added distantly<br/><br/>When she went on to speak about the flag and add in....<span style="text-decoration: underline"><span style="font-weight: bold"> You're a surprising person."</span></span><br/><br/>His eyes became very, sad he look up toward Ilia...as if to tell her a horrible thing... like that of a loved one dying or that she only had days to live.<br/><br/>"...I did not speak the words...but pledged it in my heart to serve the green," he said at last in a resolute low but firm far away voice like a condemned prisoner looking up at the gallows before being hanged.  "Though I have put on the white scarf...I just...well I was just trying to buy was all," he admitted and ashamedly glanced away, "I don't deserve your kindness... I...just heard well... whites don't normally bond warders... I might have even put on the red, but...then nobody would take it seriously," he explained. Shadow sighed there it was out, it was done, she would probably hate him for it, but at least he had come clean. Very slowly he rose to his feet, he stared at the ground...if he dared look her way he would be staring at her longingly. He wondered if she would be angry, or perhaps even cry...he wanted to cry, but he wouldn't! he refused to.<br/><br/>"It is not an easy thing to be bonded...I was just trying to buy some time so that...well ...well...the green sisters are very odd sort, and frankly I am not sure which is worse, being sentenced to guard the library from spiders, or be in a green's harem ..." he confessed. And then his back straightened his dark ebony eyes hardened ...<br/><br/>He pulled the white scarf out of his pocket and set it down beside Ilia, "I wish you were green," he sighed, "But a vow is a vow," he declared stoically....he needed to leave right then and there...but for some reason he couldn't!  he had said all there was to say...perhaps too much...perhaps not enough...<br/><br/>How he wished he could win the tournament and offer up his sword to her...this of course was a bit taboo to offer a sword to an accepted, but it wasn't uncommon amongst senior recruits and accepted in line for the shawl to declare their intent. But of course thats all it was...intent... some greens were notorious for swooping in snatching recruits up to add to their already large collection barrel chested, fair faced young warders.  That thought gave Shadow a cold shiver, thankfully he was going in and wearing Moe's massive painted brown armor! And IF he won! he would got to the tent quickly undress and it would be Moe coming out with his helmet off waving the brown Ajah's banner...most likely to the chagrin of the green and all the recruits who so desperately wanted to be noticed by the Green Aes Sedai.  It would be a thing of legends! Assuming he could still fight with so many pillows stuffed under his chest plate.  All the while winning by just the slimmest of margins to appear as if it was just bout of random luck!