Mathias heard Victor walk in, heard the soft thuds of things being set on the table, the sound of the laptop starting up. He heard the man's apology, but his brain refused to work to tell him that it wasn't his fault he was an idiot. He was the one who had let the guy fuck him. The guy who could have easily found out who he was and ended it there. The thought of how close he had been to being killed hit him, which made him sob harder. He covered his mouth with his hands, trembling as he fought to keep quiet.<br/><br/>Then Victor's arms were around him, making Mathias inhale sharply in surprise, eyes wide as he looked at the man holding him. His lips trembled as he finally stopped mumbling, staring up at Victor with wide eyes, surprised the man had initiated the hug. He wanted to tell him that it wasn't his fault that he was crying, that it was something else. But his mouth wouldn't work right.<br/><br/>God he wanted Victor to kiss him. Not for it to lead to anything, but just to know...someone cared. Someone was there for him. Someone, one someone, at least, didn't think he was trash. He clung to Victor, not wanting him to go, the memories of when he was beaten with the bat still racing through his mind.<br/><br/>"Don't...Don't let my father find out...don't...let him...he'll kill me...don't let him...kill me..." He begged softly, his voice barely a whisper as he kept his arms tightly around Victor's neck, his face buried in Victor's chest. He thought maybe if he blocked off his sight, the memories would go away.<br/><br/>For now, though, while the flashbacks beat down on him, he wanted to be held, wanted to stay in Victor's arms, at least until he started calming down. He might not even need the kiss after all. Sure, he wanted it, and knew it would probably calm him down faster than anything, but...he wasn't going to initiate it.<br/><br/>After a moment of debating, he whispered softly, "Don't...don't...please don't....let me go...don't let me go yet..." His fingers tightened in the man's shirt instinctively, showing how freaked out the young man was.