<span style="color: #FF80FF"><span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="font-size: 150%; line-height: 116%;"><div style="text-align: center;">Lea Stevens</div></span></span></span><br/><div style="text-align: center;"><a class="postlink" href="http://i300.photobucket.com/albums/nn24/SociallyToxicBeauty/036e0d3a-b28c-47ec-b858-0eaea6c67e4d.jpg">[ img ]</a></div><br/><span style="font-weight: bold"><span style="font-size: 150%; line-height: 116%;"><span style="color: #FF80FF"><div style="text-align: center;">"Jazz"</div></span></span></span><br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">“Lea, shut up. Is that all still about that guy you nicked?...you can’t deal with the fact that you had to shorten the life of a kid who asked for it?...Would it make you feel any better to know that you could have saved me, but you didn’t?”</span><br/><br/>Lea avoided his gaze, instead looking out the window as she frowned. He was right, but she didn’t want to admit it. It wouldn’t have been any better and it was likely she would have been worse off if she hadn’t saved Delgado. Still, the kid had his whole life ahead of him and she couldn’t help that maybe if she had gone for a non-lethal shot that there would have been a way to turn his life around.<br/><br/>Delgado parked the car for a moment, turning to look at her and she had no choice but to look back at him. She was clearly haunted by something that went deeper than the kid she had killed, but she didn’t seem ready to let that information go. She tucked it away in her soul somewhere Delgado could hopefully never find.<br/><br/>He gave her a speech about how her actions had hurt him and she averted her eyes again. She was selfish, she knew that—she knew that what she did, what she was doing hurt those who knew her. That was why she had withdrawn so much. She couldn’t stand seeing the disappointment in Delgado’s eyes, that look as if she had kicked his puppy.<span style="color: #FF80FF">“He was just a kid…Maybe this is just the real me…”</span>she muttered.<br/><br/>She knew no one blamed her, but she blamed herself. She was glad that she had managed to save Delgado—the department had been glad too, giving her a medal and all that. She had felt numb through all of it though. Blank stares, just going through the motions. No one could get a rise out of her. She hadn’t started with drugs—she had started with drinking.<br/><br/>The drugs came later at a night club when she was out with another officer who was sweet on her. He had slipped some ecstasy to her without her knowledge and it had perked her up. He admitted what he did later on—then introduced her to coke. He was from narcotics and had been undercover for a while, getting addicted himself. He had willingly left the force around the same time she had been suspended.<br/><br/>She remembered Delgado stopping her in the parking lot, furious as hell asking why he losing his partner to something so goddamn stupid. Why was she doing these things? What was going on with her? Did she need help, someone to talk to? What could he do for her? She had responded coldly, telling him more or less words to leave her alone and that it was her life—not his. He left more furious than he had approached her and that had been about the last time they had spoken.<br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic">“Ok, give me your address. No station. But I have an eye on you. I have no problems with some kids getting gunned down, but I have a problem with my further partner getting killed. Even if she is only some coked-up stripper now,”</span>Delgado’s voice stabbed through her thoughts and she jerked her head back up to look at him. She was surprised he had changed his mind about the station, but gave him her address.<br/><br/>She leaned her head against the window as he drove, staring into the side mirror when she noticed the van. She lifted her head slowly in thought, furrowing her brows some.<span style="color: #FF80FF">“Hey…Delgado…isn’t that van behind us the one from the club?”</span>she asked a little worriedly. Maybe the drugs made her paranoid, but she could have sworn the van had been parked in front of the club when they left. Why was it behind them now?