She was aware he was coming, afterall, she let him in; in so many ways, and for so long.<br/><br/>Her vague and yet specific memories, not altogether clear just yet, reaffirmed this.<br/><br/>It's like a child waiting in line, for that biggest, scariest, coolest roller-coaster ride, and you're next on it; do you know this feeling? The excitement as you wait in that line, moving up slowly, to finally make it to step onto that ride; now the stomach churn, the fluttering heartbeat, the rush. And yet, in the back of you head, you are asking yourself, 'what the hell did I just get myself into?'<br/><br/>Feel me, understand now; Millicent a highly guarded being emotionally, save her friends, the few she has in her life, and her child. This is for good reason, the pain suffered during her time in this world, the time that her Maker deemed was to 'learn', to become humble, as those are that she helps, to find humanity. She had found it, in a painful way, too long ago.<br/><br/>Solas, brought feelings in her she could not understand, and this excited and yet scared her. He fed to her anger and anguish, yet comfort and protection; and upon the ethereal visit he had paid her earlier, he fed her much more.<br/><br/>Mill watched as he entered, she still standing beside the couch, watching his movements, her eyes blinking slowly as she listened to him speak.<br/><br/><br/><span style="font-style: italic"><span style="color: #BFBF80">''My visit shall be short, you have my promise. I must leave to New York tonight. My flight is in two hours.''</span></span><br/><br/>Her head tilts, lips parting as he whispers this, it is all she takes from his speaking, her head slowly shaking, retorting without vocals, 'no...don't...please..'<br/><br/>Her stomach now knots, eyes sliding downward to stare at his feet, brow furrowing as she bites at her inner cheek, right hand pulling up as her fingertips rub against her sternum; the tightness taking over her chest causing her breathing to become slightly struggled at his words.<br/><br/><span style="color: #BFBF80"><span style="font-style: italic">"You look, pale. Have you fed yet?"</span></span><br/><br/>Millicent takes in a slow and deep breath, her head again shaking, replying with a soft vocal that is laden with confusion and sadness. 'no...I was...distracted.' Her mind swims with too much, clouding her ability to speak as she needs and wants to. She continues, her words slow, almost forced, even though little thought is given to what comes from her lips. 'I know...I need to. I...'<br/><br/>Her eyes close, she squeezing them and sighing heavily, refusing to look the man in the face, she chooses to offer some direction to his reason for being here. Her tone of a serious nature, her voice slightly pitched, yet still a whisper; the overwhelming feeling under her sternum clouding her mindset, she feels as though drugged, and it shows clearly in her demeanor and her slowed speech. 'You fell, Solas. There were many, and...you fell. I...Isolde, she was in the distance, she saw...I remember this. She saw, and she tried...others did, too. There...was so much<span style="font-style: italic">death</span>...'<br/><br/>Now pausing, she sucks in a breath of air, her eyes snapping open, a stark contrast to the dark room, yet still looking at the floor between them. Another recall, as if by speaking of it, more of that night came back to her. She shifts her weight upon her bare feet, continuing, 'I had to take the King's soul...became distracted. I...'..her eyes squint, a low moan lifting in the space between them, she withholding much that she does know, trying in vain to remember exact details, an entire moment lost in her mind, that she cannot get back at this time.<br/><br/>'I obviously did...I was sent for another soul....I failed....in a way...I failed...and was punished.'<br/><br/>She again sighs, her right hand moving from her sternum, having left a mark by the continual toying of it to try to quell the tightness behind the bone. Her body shivers, and she opens her mouth to speak further, then closes it.<br/><br/>She kept so much from him, the carnage, the blood on her own hands as she knelt before his body, screaming for Isolde, Jarvan, Jimmy....Kell, Kell tried so hard to get to them, and Raven; she kept Turbertus, the first to arrive to Solas' laying body, the man wounded himself yet still strong. She kept the utter panic and mournful feeling that raced through her body at the remembrance she experienced during her failed hunt tonight, to herself; simply expressing it involuntarily by a tear streaking down her cheek, gliding over her lips, and falling from her chin.<br/><br/>She opts to stay positive, afterall, he made it, and Isolde did, too. They defeated the Dark King, their own oddly formed group. She looks up at Solas now, smiling softly, trying to uplift her tone, 'but look at you now, you made it. Isolde, she did, too. That's a good thing, right?'<br/><br/>Her convincing attempt is somewhat accepted by her own self, and she hopes Solas accepts this as well; although she knows he will continue to pressure her. His mission here is for answers, she is certain.<br/><br/>Another heavy sigh, she feels sick, as though told her closest friend just passed, the boiling emotion of wanting to simply weep overpowering her typical stature. She tries, again, to be assuring, her throat tight as is her chest still, throat clearing to push down this unexplained feeling. 'I guess my punishment wasn't very bad...I just...don't remember what it was.'<br/><br/>This statement true at this time, she held nothing back in this part, and had the ability to now look directly into Solas' gaze. She steps towards him, closing the distance to mere inches, her right palm pulling up to his forehead, sliding over his features before pausing at his chin; she lifts on tiptoe, and gently kisses his left, then right cheek, whispering in a warm breath, 'thank you for dinner, and for Arie.'<br/><br/>Slowly dropping back to a solid stance on her feet, she shudders inwardly, her body shaking as if a chill passed through her, her breath now surrounding his jawline as the soft flesh of her own cheek traces his chin, 'why do you haunt me so, Solas?'<br/><br/>Millicent frowns now as she finishes this thought, her expression hidden by their posture, and her voice barely a whisper against his warmth, 'why have you found way inside of me...why?'