Havoc got really sad upon seeing her get kisses that were unwanted. And when he saw all the kisses she got that she did want, he became confused, which wasn't hard in his state. He thought kissing was special, it's why he didn't like Chrysy's kiss, that wasn't special, it was just out of rebellion. Was he wrong in that, were you just supposed to do it as you desired it? Auxana certainly seemed to enjoy it when she wanted to receive it. Which was good, so was each of those special or no? Should he take this as special? If it wasn't special, then does it mean nothing, just something enjoyable for Auxana, which would be fine. But he thought kissing was special, as in it meant that you weren't just two people anymore, you were united. Uniting was always something Havoc wanted to find someone he could do that with, and had planned on that being the person he kissed, was that not how the rest of the world worked? His head started to hurt with all this complicated thinking.<br/><br/>Auxana broke off the kiss and he held his head. "Actually yeah, I feel... weird, and it's hard to think, which is really really rare for me. You've kissed like, a lot of people though, like a barrel of apples a lot, not like a basket of fish a lot. Okay maybe not apples, watermelons? Bread? I've kissed one people, no two people, yes two, so I guess you win. I didn't like the first kiss but this one was nice, yeah nice, it was nice. Not that it means we're united or anything, I guess, do you know what that means? You probably don't know what that means. You probably don't even know what I'm saying, which is good because I'm not saying anything at all, nope.  Why does my brain feel like this, I don't like it. YES, sleep, that is definitely what this calls for." Havoc wasn't at all acting like himself and all his emotions and thoughts were all in a confused bundle together. He then just collapsed to the side and closed his eyes.<br/><br/>___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________<br/><br/>"I have actually avoided alcohol my whole life, my step father was a mean alcoholic and I swore never to even have the chance to be anything like him. So I don't know what being buzzed feels like." He said while smiling at her, he didn't have a problem with alcohol, it was just something he didn't like to have himself. When she asked him if he was okay, his heart plummeted, he never knew what to say to that. He tried not to lie, though vampires were amazing liars, but he also didn't want to burden anyone with what he dealt with, most people had their own stuff to worry about. Plus whenever he did start thinking about it himself, he felt like shutting down. Which was exactly what was beginning to happen now that he was starting to think of why he wasn't okay. His hand balled up in a fist and he tried to shake the thoughts and the feelings. Eventually he looked up at her with a half smile and a shrug. "I have to be."