Reese looks up. Seeing it was her. "Just cuts. Not trying to kill myself. I swear I wasn't trying to kill myself." he says honestly. Pleading with her to believe him. To not hate him for something that had long ago spiraled out of control. He watches the wound heal over. Watches the pain fade. And pouts. "Now it isn't rational anymore..." he says outloud as if to himself. "Now the pain...isn't rational." he says. Sighing a bit. Looking at her. ".........." he went to tell her and Fang entered. When she was finished and Fang was gone he waited until he was sure of it. "I don't do it to die. I do it to feel pain that is rational." he says softly. "I've cut since I was three. It got worse...after I failed my fiance...she is dead...because I wasn't fast or strong enough..." he looks up. "A guy showed me up. Only not to protect her...to hurt her because she chose me over him..." he has tears in his eyes.<br/><br/>"It got worse. I don't do it to die. I can't die. The damn wounds heal too fast. They heal too fast even for feeling cutting pain. But I had to learn a way that made pain rational. I was abused since was three. My foster parents. My foster mother raped me when I turned thirteen until I ran off at sixteen. She isn't in this town...none of them are. My older foster brother...he would beat me to within an inch of my life..." he started to just let it all out. "Please...don't hate me Essense. It only happens...when there is hurt or pain. I don't mean to...I've tried to break the habit...I just...can't."