In the end Zachariah had ultimately decided he would probably never tell another living soul he had been unable to put that final bullet in Raziel. He knew he should have, part of him wished he had turned back and done it, but how could he have stained his hands with the blood of the man who he had once cared so deeply about? Looking back he had no regrets, that man deserved to suffer for everything he has done, and in the end he had been able to bring peace to the Holy Land. God had been on his side and had guided him through everything he had been through today. If He had wanted him to finish Raziel he would not have allowed him to turn away from the man. His decision to allow the man to die alone was probably the best thing he could have done for him either way. It was a decision that was going to haunt him, but it was for the best.<br/><br/>Not even Ivan, or Maverick, or Azrai, praying to God that the man would see a full recovery as soon as possible, would be told everything.<br/><br/>When Ivan had entered the room it had taken a lot for him not to just break down and let all of his emotions out. He needed to keep his usual demeanor, â€œIvan.â€ He had addressed the man calmly, leaving out the fact that he was not sure if he would have made it back here alive. The look on his face, the calmness of his voice, was enough to tell the man he was exhausted.<br/><br/>Lucian on the other hand, had given a curt nod before he was told by the medics to rest while they changed the bandages on his wrists. All he wanted to do was go home. He said nothing when Ivan and Zachariah had left the room, too busy thinking about Elias hoping the man had not been harmed in all this mess either. When he got back he would go right to his place and let him know he was alright, in person, and then go out for some beers and possibly something to eat. He would treat for the meal but Elias would be paying for the drink. Yeah, that sounded delightful right about now, he thought to himself.<br/><br/>â€œI have heard about Azraiâ€™s condition from one of the medics. Youâ€™ve had your hands full from what I understand.â€ Zachariahâ€™s voice was calm, trying to keep a light mood, light as it was going to get, as best he could. As he followed Ivan he could tell that the Russian was having a rough time keeping himself together and wanted to use that hidden ability of his to try to bring a calmer sense to the air. There was a lot of tension and quite frankly he did not like coming back to this, part of him wanted to just go into a dark room and scream until his voice decided to fail him. Ivan was doing all he could so he would not mention anything more than what he had said, even though he did not like the idea of Azraiâ€™s personality changing. He didnâ€™t want to make the man feel like what he was doing was not enough, as he was not some sort of super hero who had the power to do a million things at once and always have a positive outcome. Since he had done something he was sure was not a good idea order to stand up to Raziel he had no room to talk.<br/><br/>Would he be changed forever because of what he had done? Surely he would. He was sure that this was not temporary, even if he had only drunk it and not injected it into his blood.<br/><br/>As he was reminded of it he decided was not going to tell his followers about the liquid either. Only those who knew of its existence, who had helped him create it, would know. Thankfully there had only been that one small vial of it, and whatever else had been created would have likely been destroyed along with the base. Finding a way to get rid of it discreetly would have been easier said than done. He hoped that they would see his wounds healing faster than the human body could normally regenerate as him being a saint. It was a little selfish to think that way, he hated lying to his followers, he was always up front and truthful with them, but this was for the best. God was already going to punish him for it and he didnâ€™t need to be scolded by his followers or have them think any less of him. For all he knew God was already punishing him by not allowing Azrai to recover like they wished.<br/><br/>Perhaps everyone was being punished in their own way. He had told Azrai not to push himself, had he not? And now he has gone and gotten himself poisoned, probably as a result of trying to keep Shizu safe, and it was slowly killing him. The man might have been one of the most stubborn of people he has ever come across poison was a serious thing. As much as he wanted to see the man he was reluctant to enter Azraiâ€™s room. Maybe he just wanted to believe the man was not as close to death as Ivan described, believing the man was far too stubborn to just give up and die. He wanted so badly to believe that poison would not be enough to take him down. The more he listened to Ivan the more he doubted it, since Azrai had already been in bad condition it made sense that his body might not be strong enough to fight back the poison effectively.<br/><br/>Taking in a deep breath he looked Ivan in the eye after hearing everything he had to say he gently placed a hand on Ivanâ€™s shoulder as if to comfort him.  The task of lifting his arm was more than he thought because of how fatigued he was, â€œYou have done well, Ivan, I know that must have been hard for you so do not beat yourself up wondering if what youâ€™ve done was the right thing. Rest assured that I am behind your decision one hundred percent. Azrai was a fool for accepting that mission, this is for the best, and those two would have had to be separated eventually either way. The sooner, the better, Iâ€™m sure you can agree.â€ Somewhere deep down he knew that separating Azrai and Shizu was the best thing to do. If everybody else was comfortable with it, it made it easier for him to give his final word, finalizing the decision; they should have known he would not object that Azrai would be better off without her.<br/><br/>As much as he hated to see those two go especially because he knew that Azrai rarely got attached to people so quickly he knew this was for the best. He was partly doing this not only to keep Azrai safe but protect the organization as well. The organization was his top priority no matter how much he valued the lives of the only people he dared call his friends after losing Raziel. Oh yes, he was going to remember Raziel for a long time, probably until the day he died so long as traces of his existence, no matter how subtle, remained to keep reminding him. Everybody was going to have a difficult time explaining to Azrai that it had been Shizuâ€™s decision, that she cared about him and that was why she was leaving him. Sometimes you need to let go of the things you care about, like he had been forced to do with Raziel.<br/><br/>â€œZachariah?â€ Another voice. Maverick was up and moving again, several exasperated medics trying to coax him back into his room for more rest. He snapped at them in a harsh tone, â€œOh would you get the fuck away from me already? If I can move around, Iâ€™m fine; I donâ€™t need any more fucking rest!â€ His words would have made more of an impact on them if he wasnâ€™t so tired, drugged up, and somewhat dazed from the affects of pain killers. Could anyone blame him for being so restless? Not only was his best friend dying, their leader had returned from the battlefield. Everyone else had gotten to see him; some people were still peering out to see for their selves he was still alive, he just had to come, partly to support Ivan as well. That man has been through a lot trying to keep everything organized. It came as no surprise that all of his emotions were finally beginning to break through.<br/><br/>â€œLet him alone, you should all go tend to Azrai. He needs the most attention right now,â€ Zachariah told the medics when they tried to speak to Maverick again.<br/><br/>â€œSir, what about you?â€<br/><br/>â€œI will be fine. I will not accept it if we lose Azrai.â€ For the first time since he had come here there was a bit of a growl in Zachariahâ€™s tone. He was serious about not losing him though he was not going to dismiss the possibility. Azrai was only human. Even Maverick seemed to straighten up a little when their leader spoke as if in agreement. He turned his attention back to Ivan and Maverick, â€œI donâ€™t want to lose Azrai,â€ he spoke softer now, â€œbut in the end whether he pulls through or not will be for God to decide. Perhaps this is his punishment for being so stubborn and deciding to be a lone wolf.â€ He might have sounded cruel but he was only speaking what was on his mind; sometimes he had to be a cruel leader even though he did not like to be.  Running a hand through his hair, he turned his attention towards Maverick, â€œI was just telling Ivan that I agree Shizu and Azrai need to be separated.â€<br/><br/>Maverick seemed a little taken aback by this, but nodded in agreement. â€œItâ€™s for the best, I think.â€ He would have brought up taking Shizu back with him, he knew some people back at home that were not associated with the organization, it might be safer that she cuts ties with the organization completely, the sooner those two were separated the better. If it meant that Azrai would have a chance, then so be it, he only hoped that he would take the news well. Surely even Azrai was aware that he would have to part ways with Shizu sooner or later. But even then he knew the man had become very attached to her and he was probably going to protest. Part of him wished he could hear the manâ€™s input, his thoughts about this situation, perhaps even said a good-bye to herâ€¦ No, on second thought it was for the best that she just left him even if it was probably a little cruel.<br/><br/>â€œThen it is settled.â€ As time passed, Zachariah could feel his energy fading more and more. Determined to get everything sorted out and lift some of the weight off of Ivanâ€™s shoulders he used every last bit of what energy did remain to stay awake. He knew he needed rest, but it was too soon. The battle might have been won, but he had a lot he needed to take care of before he could finally call it a day. â€œIvan, you have made preparations already correct? Iâ€™ll be taking it over from here, get some much needed rest, Iâ€™m sure you know there is still a lot we need to get done before we can send her on her way.â€ His voice didnâ€™t seem to have much vitality left in it; he really was starting to push himself a little. As much as he wanted to rest he simply could not have Ivan doing everything, not when the man was already at his limit, the man has done enough for one day and he was very grateful he had been able to hold out this long.<br/><br/>Sometimes he hated being the leader of a huge organization, having so many people depending on him to pull them through. He wished he could wave a magic wand and be done with everything.<br/><br/>Leaning against the wall a little more than he realized, he asked â€œIs Shizu awake?â€ Maverick nodded and gestured towards Azraiâ€™s room. Reluctantly he pushed off the wall and entered the room slowly. What he saw caused a tightening to form in his chest. The girl seemed to be fine, but Azraiâ€¦ he was very weak. Zachariah closed his eyes and uttered a silent prayer before he moved beside Shizu and placed a hand on her shoulder. â€œThey told me you had given him some of your blood at the price of you leaving us,â€ he spoke softly. â€œI want to tell you Iâ€™m not angry with your decision, you were doing what you felt was right. You care about him, as do we. He has been through Hell and back just to rescue youâ€¦ All we can do now is hope he will be alright.â€ He wasnâ€™t sure if he sounded as reassuring as he had hoped but at least it was something.