Xavier could sense Abi's frustration and he shared it silently.  He followed her to the porch, part of the house that he had really fallen in love with when they bought the place.  She couldn't be serious, she had no idea about his job, had he really been that quiet about it.  As she talked it was clear that was how she felt.  When they were young and had kids he had often not wanted to worry her with the dangers of being a big city police officer.  Then as a detective, he thought many of the crimes he had to investigate were too sordid to tell his wife who was ensconced in the sheltered world of academia.<br/><br/>"Yes, I like it, you know that."  He said, a bit more testily than he meant but then he got more serious as she peppered him with questions.  "Well back when I was working the street, sometimes the biggest challenge was just making sure I came home at the end of each shift."  He had felt he had protected her from all that back at the time, and now she was resentful of that protection, it grated on him, as if she were unappreciative of his duty and sacrifice.  "Yea, sometimes I felt in danger, but usually when cops get killed it is unexpectedly, so that sense of danger is always in the background."  He didn't want to get into a BLM debate with her but he knew full well that some of those shootings weren't racist as much as they were frightened cops.  Small men too frightened to do the job properly and accept some measure of risk.  "You know, we talked about this, it would be my retirement gig."  This was code among cops for an easy last few years to pad the pension, of course Abi wasn't a cop so that term probably made no sense to her.<br/><br/>"I guess that's what I've become, but it isn't who I want to be.  I want to be your husband, your lover, your friend.  If you'll still have me."  His eyes get teary, something that almost never happened.  "So tell me about you, what do you like best about teaching?"  He started awkwardly but at  least his effort was sincere.  "What has been your favorite research trip?"  As he got more comfortable and more into the moment.  "Who is your favorite student?"  It was of course a veiled reference to Robin, or so he thought she might answer, but then again she might surprise him.