I sat on the couch trying my best to not think any more then I really had to. I had already cried more then my fair share last night and this morning. Generally every day for the last week, I had cried like a baby. But no one had yet seen me cry. I believed if anyone had seen me then it would have made me look weak. As it was I suspect most people secretly called me a Bitch. The girl that had not shed one tear yet. I did not think many people in my family would understand my inability to cry openly. But if anyone did understand I suspect it would be Sophia. Sophia was making me want to cry right now. Her own tears and her own misery were breaking thru my Armour. It made me want to express some of my own misery. But I was not able to do that right now. I was in Big sister mode and Sophia was the priority right now. I would stay strong I would be Sophia's Rock for as long as Sophia needed that. That is what a good big sister does for her little sister. I sighed and wrapped my arms more Firmly around Sophia. She really was a good Kid. Plus it was nice to see real human emotions off of her. I leaned in and gave her a small kiss on her for head.<br/><br/>I was wearing a rather short skirt. My legs were very visible under that skirt. Long and smooth they were a great pride of mine. Years of Running and playing Sports mostly Hockey. Had sculpted my legs into power full and well toned legs. My Tank top was super cute and black that seemed...fitting. I was going to wear a long dress to the funeral. But I never had time to put that on yet. I had absolutely no make up on. But that was normal for me. I never EVER wore any make up period. With Sophia putting her tears and washed off make up all over my top. I suspected the Top would be useless after today. Lucky for me I did not wear the overly expensive black dress I think.<br/><br/>My mind strayed back to a couple of hours before. I was going to see Sophia to see how she was doing. When I found the younger girl in tears on her bed...My heart broke. When Sophia noticed me and admitted she did not want to go to the funeral. I decided at that moment that she would not have to go and I would stay home with her. I did not want to leave the girl all alone. When she was hurting this much. I went down stairs my hands rolled up into fists. I pointed at the rest of the family. Then announced Sophia would be staying home. I would also be staying home. I stared my brothers and sisters down then. Considering the stress and pain I felt mixed with knowing many people saw me as a cold hearted bitch....If anyone had challenged my Demands just then I may have punched them. Lucky for me no one challenged me.<br/><br/>So here I was sitting with Sophia. "I love you to Sophia. You never have to thank me for being here. Your my Sister your my blood. I would do absolutely ANYTHING for you". I felt your hands caressing my back but I did not think anything of it. I put a hand under your chin and lifted your face to look at me. Sitting Eye to eye with you I took a wet cloth and gently washed your face. I considered you last words..You don't know what to do. "Listen to me brat the only thing you need to do right now is to be here and be with me. I don't expect anything of you and your safe here with me. I love you deeply Sophia". I lean in and kiss you gently on the cheek. "Grandpa was a great man. One thing that made him great was how he always acted on his instincts. Trust your self Sophia I have faith in you and how strong you are. So right now we can do absolutely anything you want. Anything that will make you feel better.