There were no windows in the bathroom and he only had the lights on dim as he clung to the toilet seat feeling the mother of all panic attacks set in as he felt like his world was ending the ground was going to open up to trap him forever. Because he could be, sealed up and entombed left to suffer as his sanity was stripped away and that was always a fear that gripped him stronger than any fear of death had been. Few people knew what his sentence had been back then. Sure they knew that Diana and him as sinned, that a few got to decide their fate and it ended with her death sentence and Kane's literal life sentence.<br/><br/>The trauma that had been laid on him went beyond that as he had pleaded with them to take his life let her live only to be told that he would be the one to carry out the execution. That he was a soul eater so it was going to be his task. How was what they had such a crime and here he was married to an angel pressured into fucking him when they had worked so hard to break him before. He couldn't stand and answer the other, not with his teeth clenched so hard he was sure they would break. This was so fucked up and they knew it, they had to know! Having Abbaddon strapped with this was also unfair to him as he had so much fucking baggage and the guy was trying his best.<br/><br/>He still didn't know how a would so ancient could feel so fucking fresh with this new life presented to him and with everyone acting like it was goddamn norman for him to shack up with a being that had been forbidden. It took great effort but he managed to get his closed up throat breathing again as he lay on the bathroom floor curled up. "Fine." He tried to call out to his husband. Right. Husband. Because he had sworn off women after her death.