Eivind had finally settled, and instead of reacting aggressively or trying to come up with an excuse for his actions, the wolf quietly explained himself. Blue felt all the fire in him die, save for the flame that gently burned in his gut for Eivind, the one that hinted at Blue's deep, reticent yearning. His stiff body relaxed as Eivind's words gingerly slid up his arms and kissed at his ears, desirous for understanding. And Blue understood, somewhat. If the desire to have Eivind inside of him had wracked the young man with enough turmoil that he had needed to run away and pleasure himself in the shower, he couldn't even begin to imagine how that need had taken hold of Eivind's superior senses and his animalistic mind. Eivind felt something deeply that Blue could only grasp at the shadows, and although he didn't appreciate the wolf's thoughtless actions, he understood. Somewhat.<br/><br/>Blue offered no resistance as Eivind pulled him close. He moaned softly when Eivind pressed delicate kisses to his collarbone, and hummed with a satisfied lilt when the wolf rested his forehead against him. He listened to the wolf's continued explanation, and felt his heart sink at his mention of Blue's smell. "I still smell like them?" Blue replied sadly, shifting his body up and pulling away so he could look into Eivind's eyes. "That must be absolutely maddening for you. I have to live every day with what they did, and I will forever. But there are moments, like when I was painting the staircase, that I forget, and I feel at peace. But you . . . you have to smell them all the time, don't you? Whenever I'm around, you sense them. You are constantly reminded that they had me, aren't you?"<br/><br/>The boy's ability to feel sympathy for Eivind's stresses were odd, even to him. He had lived through hell for over a month, kept as a pet and a slave by monstrous brutes, and he shouldn't have cared whether Eivind was upset that Blue<i>smelled</i>just a bit off. But something about the way Eivind spoke pulled at Blue's heartstrings, and he found himself wishing he could alleviate the confusion and agony that seemed to burden Eivind's mind. Is this what it was to be a wolf's mate? To feel pulled to them at every waking moment, to wish for their peace of mind with every ounce of one's being? He still didn't understand what this all meant, and it was obvious that Eivind didn't, either. They had no choice but to figure this out together, but they couldn't do it like this, their bodies constantly warring with their sensibilities.<br/><br/>Blue sighed and bit his lower lip as he considered Eivind's proposition. Having Eivind leave wasn't a solution that he particularly liked, but if the older male thought that he wouldn't be able to resist with them living in the same house, there didn't seem to be any alternative. Perhaps, when they finally had sex, and Blue became more comfortable with Eivind's advances, this crazed mania would cease, and the two could just<i>be</i>. But that didn't seem like something that could happen now. Blue couldn't force himself to be happy with the speed at which things were moving, and it was unfair for him to tell Eivind he couldn't touch when it appeared to torture him so.<br/><br/>"Maybe . . . maybe you should leave," Blue said sadly, his stormy gray eyes sparkling as he looked down at the wolf. "Just for a little bit, so we can both, I don't know, reset? This, what we're doing now . . . it isn't working. Not how it's supposed to. We both realize that. And I . . . " The words were hard for Blue to get out, but he was determined to force them off of his tongue in any way he could. "I want to try this with you. Whatever it is."<br/><br/>The boy exhaled deeply and stared intense at Eivind's dark face, a frown taking hold of his mouth. He didn't want him to leave. But what else could they do? He moved his body and leaned forward to press his lips against Eivind's once more, letting himself taste the wolf fully. His tongue sweetly pushed at Eivind's lips, quietly requesting entrance. Maybe just a little more kissing, a little more touching before they separated would be okay . . .