<i>Yet he approves of this?</i><br/><br/>"He--" Basren said, and stopped. Alarm clanged through him like a struck bell, and he was too busy with the way it shivered up and down his body to do more than stumble in his words. What had he done? "The Queen--thought--it was time... I'm sorry."<br/><br/>He went for more coffee, and when he came back, Alaras was stormy. There was no more lean. There wasn't much of anything.<br/><br/>He'd fucked it up. Not an hour past the revelation that he was getting an offer and he'd fucked it all up. He knew exactly when he'd done it, because Alaras' color had gone out, and it wasn't a fit of his health. The rest of their conversation had gone stilted, with Basren trying valiantly to go on while Alaras gave him the previous treatment he'd had. He was curt, distracted, barely seemed bothered to given an answer at all, or some combination of those.<br/><br/>When Alaras tired of that, he excused himself and left. Wendal was laughing at Basren behind his cup, while Labelle gave him the most pitying look. Reynel only looked as though he wasn't surprised. Basren just sat for a moment, misery creeping in, until the Queen came and snapped at him. He could hardly tell her he'd told Alaras that he was sleeping with the King, so Basren put down his coffee cup and made a hasty retreat to catch him up.<br/><br/>"Please, wait," he called down the hall.<br/><br/>The servants would talk. It was one thing to do this behind closed doors, under the safe skirts of the Queen (as safe as that was in the first place), and quite another to broadcast this drama to the underclass of them. To Sovele's spies.<br/><br/>He jogged up to Alaras anyway, who didn't look in any mood to be caught up. But Basren reached out and caught him by the sleeve. He couldn't bear to take his hand, not yet. Not ever, if this didn't work out.<br/><br/>"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm sorry, please, I--"<br/><br/>There was the soft thump of a foot on heavy carpet, and Basren glanced up to see that a servant had indeed stumbled into the hall. His eyes went wide at them, and since he was not dressed in livery, he turned his face to the wall, away from them and would stand there until they left.<br/><br/>Basren gave Alaras a pleading look and, tightening his grip, pulled him along into the closest room. It was the children's private library, and it was quiet. A single magic lamp had been set on the table, for any time someone wished to use the space, and it was, blessedly, vacant at the moment. Basren was quick to release Alaras' sleeve, aware of the transgression of pulling him anyway, not least touching him in the first place.<br/><br/>"I wish you would let me explain," he said. He was looking at Alaras' boots, trying to figure out what explanation that could be. Alaras hadn't known the rumors, and once he had... "I'm so sorry. I was--too blunt. I only thought... the rumors are so<i>pervasive</i>, and... I promise, there has never been a child between us, or even an attempt. And there--there really is no danger. I had it from the Queen herself, that Sovele has... taken himself out of the way."<br/><br/>He glanced up, trying to assess how this was going. He himself was certainly distressed enough, but trying to figure out what he'd done wrong and just listing them all off was surely not going to be pleasing. It was just all he had, since he didn't know Alaras well enough. He couldn't press kisses to him, the way he might Sovele, or fall to his feet. He only had his words, and he wasn't sure which of them was going to convince Alaras that he was<i>sorry</i>.<br/><br/>"I know this would not be a marriage of equals. But I am healthy, I assure you, and I--" Surely Alaras didn't want to be reminded of Sovele, of Basren being trained to be good for someone. "I would serve you well. I beg only that we have the chance I spoke of. To see if we'd suit. I promise I'll--I won't upset you again. I'll be very careful."