At the sound of a voice Carson stopped and turned, wearily resigned to having to talk to people with whom he had no desire to see. This time it was Luke and Max, apparently. At least there was some morbid satisfaction in the way they recoiled from him, from his more savage look. He didn't say a word as Luke sent Max away and explained the aftermath of that day to him. When the boy dared to<i>touch</i>him, Carson nearly broke his arm, but looked away instead and trudged grimly along to follow.<br/><br/>His mind turned back to the day he'd woken up, after surgery and two days in and out of consciousness. His battered body had been healed but the soreness remained, bruises and memories of wounds that it told him shouldn't have been repaired yet. He remembered Letto coming to him and asking if he was alright. He remembered asking about<i>no, don't think the name</i>and the terrible silence that had followed. He asked again and again but all Letto could tell him were two words.<i>I'm sorry.</i>Carson had lost his mind. He had raged out of the room, down the hall, staggering and wearing nothing more than cotton pants, determined to go back and get her. It had taken Sunny and Letto both to restrain him, and they had held him as he broke down there in the hall, screaming and crying and unwilling to believe.<br/><br/>But the truth was always crueler than... than...<br/><br/>Everything left his mind when he saw her. Every bitter thought, every sorrowful memory, every angry regret. The apology he'd half-composed to her mother faded like ash in the wind. She was moving, she was moving<i>toward </i>him, and he was quick to respond, meeting her halfway. His arms wrapped around her tightly, keeping her upright and close. "M... Malia...?" he whispered against her dark, smooth hair. His arms tightened, as if to banish some illusion, but no.<br/><br/>When she kissed him he was slow to respond, still in disbelief, but when his mind caught up he lifted her off her feet and held her tight. He didn't let her back down until it broke, and tears welled heavily in his eyes. She was real, she was here, she was... somehow... alive. He held her arms tight and shook his head. "It's okay, you're hurt, you... you're here, though, you're alive... all this time, I... I..." He dropped to his knees abruptly, his hands sliding down to grasp hers, his head bowed forward. "Malia, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I left. I had to, Letto thought you were dead, and I lost consciousness, I... I didn't want to leave you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that I wasn't here with you."