This was it. The beginning of the end. Or was it just the beginning? Either way, he rapidly nearing the point of no return, or perhaps he had blazed past it long ago. He didn't need Mau to tell him what he already knew, but her words only confirmed it for him.<br/><br/><i> I did.</i><br/><br/>This situation they were in, this violent, intimate, desperate situation, was just as much his fault as hers. It was his fault for coming back, whether intentional or not, for getting Mau's hopes up once more. It would have been better for them if he'd stayed away, if they'd stayed apart. If they'd never seen each other again, stayed apart so that they could both get on with their lives. Mau would have moved on from him, and he could've moved on to whatever fucked up integration into society he needed.<br/><br/>But would it really have been better? His rational self would say yes. His rational self was also rapidly slipping away to the heat of Mau's breath, the hunger in the way she pushed her neck against his fingers, the way that her legs molded against his body in that familiar way like she had done so many times before. Maybe this was better, a twisted part of him ventured. This was what was meant to be. No matter what he did to Mau, no matter how much he hurt her, she would always come crawling back to him. He could lose himself in her tantalizing arms, her milky skin, her raw desperation.<br/><br/>She said a few sentences. They barely even registered in his mind. The slight scrape of her nails against his arm sent a soft jolt of wonderful pain through him, a delightful sensation that sent his blood pumping.<br/><br/>Would it even matter? Did it even matter? Did he even know how he felt?<br/><br/>He knew how he felt. He stared into Mau's emerald eyes, blurred by a slight sheen of tears, traced the faint streak of mascara down her cheeks. Inspected the slight quivering of her chin in defiance. Vaguely felt his shirt bunching up around her fists, carrying the weight of an insatiable hunger. Felt that tantalizing and sweet temptation of her body intertwined against him, separated by just a couple layers of clothing. He could feel her pulse through his fingers wrapped around her neck, a rhythm carrying the promise of life. Yes, he knew how he felt.<br/><br/>Before he could respond, Mau preempted him and he felt her oh so soft lips against his, cutting his voice off with a blissful sweetness. That was the beginning. The beginning of the end. That luscious sensation that wiped away his reservations and fanned the blistering flames licking his heart. She wanted it, and finally he did too. He resigned himself to the heat that ached to escape him, meeting her kiss with a dark vigor of his own, their lips clashing in a violent and frenzied passion that carried no trace of romance.<br/><br/>She was so, so sweet. This sensation that he had been denied for five years, this reunion of their bodies and lips and tongues. It surged up inside him, a ravenous thirst that was the force of his entire being yearning more, to release everything that he had pent up inside of him. His fingers left her wrist, no doubt leaving marks, and twisted their painful way into her hair, forcing her against his face, tilting her head back so that he could better assert himself over her. He felt an unquenchable energy, begging for him to move, to lust, to feel.<br/><br/>His body turned of its own accord, carrying Mau with him until they crashed against the kitchen wall, still locked in their embrace. He held her against the wall with his body and a hand at her throat, his leg lodged between hers, his growl vibrating their kiss. His.<br/><br/>Ryan's lips parted, his tongue darting out and brushing insistently against her lips, searching for that saccharine and intoxicating sweetness in rough, emphatic motions.