"Flattered, friend, but I don't swing both ways." Diego replied dismissively as his attention was taken by the activity at the bar.  The lady with the back tattoos had made a friend, one who wasn't the type to keep his hands to himself.  She didn't appear to be entirely bothered by him, though the crossing of her legs was a bit of a red flag.  Hell, from the look of it, she was flirting right back.  Was this...?  Diego glanced at the bard, who was apparently watching the same show he was, and noted the same look of amusement as the minstrel had been giving him just a few hands earlier.  Ah, the lady was running a con.<br/><br/>Unfortunately, things were going a bit sour for her as her mark's pudgy buddy came up from behind and took hold of her shoulder before whispering some sweet nothing in her ear.  Apparently the lads weren't going to simply try their luck one at a time, but rather go for a nice gangbang.  If there was one thing Diego didn't like, it was breaching etiquette by interfereing with a con.  But, professional courtesy demanded he step in should things start to go south.  Who said there was no honor among thieves?<br/><br/>With a sigh, Diego gathered up his winnings, feeling quite happy with a nice, heavy purse.  "Looks like you'll have to deal me out.  I'm about to go get punched in the face." He said sullenly before grabbing his tankard and tipping back a nice, long pull to get his face good flushed.  Bit of a staggering gait took him over towards the bar as he contemplated which play this called for.<br/><br/>Traitor's Two-step?  Nah, that was best done with a partner.<br/><br/>Grumpy Bandit?  No time to find a raccoon.<br/><br/>Knife Point Wedding?  Best suited for urban areas, but a bit of reworking and it worked just fine in small towns.<br/><br/>"You!" Diego hollered with a drunkard's belligerence at the trio, not really indicating anyone in particular, "Which one of you syphilis ridden son of whores put a seed in my cousin's belly?!"  He rounded on the two men still at the table, "Or was it one of you?!" He turned to the man who'd gone to speak to the bard, "Or you?!  I know it was one of you!"  Wheeling about with a stumble and sloshing his drink over the pudgy, balding red head, Diego glared drunkenly at him and pointed at him with his tankdard, sending another splash of ale at him, "Who's gonna wanna marry her now, eh?!  You have any idea how much of a dowry it'll take to marry off a woman with a bastard on her belly?!  You gonna pony up the coin, you...urp...ass?!"