<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99">Kate watched all of the emotions flicker across Gibbs's face after he had read her words once, and then twice. And when he reached for her, she went to him without hesitation. The gentleness of his touch surprised her, and she was sure that it showed on her face and in her eyes, and when his hands cupped her cheeks, she locked eyes with him. When <br/>
he leaned in and instigated the kiss this time, her lips tingled as soon as his pressed against hers. She took the action for what it meant, and understood what he was telling her, even without the words.<br/>
<br/>
That he was willing to try, too. When the kiss ended and they both pulled back, she saw the tears in his eyes. Tears filled her own eyes when Gibbs rubbed his thumb along her cheekbone, and then kissed her cheeks and forehead before he pulled back. </span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px">When he started to type, she waited until he had finished, and then read his message, before typing one of her own. <i>You don't have to thank me for being honest. It was time that I told someone the truth. Past time, actually. I've never talked about Dan, either. From '94, up until now, '03, I haven't mentioned him.</i><br/>
<br/>
<i>Or allowed myself to think about him for more than a few minutes a day, since I left law school. It hurt too much. Especially thinking about the what if's. I drove myself crazy with them for a week after Dan died, and then I couldn't take it anymore and left. As for it not being easy, that's true. </i></span></span></span><i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px">We're both struggling. We're both dealing with changes.<br/>
But at least we have each other now. I wasn't close to anyone when I worked for the Secret Service, so I never told anyone. And when I joined your team, I was afraid to trust.<br/>
<br/>
Afraid to allow myself to be human again. And even though I've been on your team for 2 years, Ducky and Tony and Tim, don't know about my history, either. I haven't been comfortable with talking and being personal. But, I want to change that, now. And Gibbs, I need to do something else, too. First, I need to say, I know you won't ever replace Dan, and I appreciate you saying that. I also know that I'll never replace your girls, and I won't ever try to. They're a part of you... a part of your life and your history.. and <br/>
that's not something I ever want to mess with. <br/>
<br/>
As for the other thing I need to do, I need to apologize to you. And I need to apologize to Tony. So, I'm going to need you to do me a favor soon, and order him to come over here and see me. I don't know if he was ever here while I was in the coma, but if he wasn't, it's okay, because I get it. But anyway, I'm sorry. For being a bitch, and a hardass, and pushing you away any time you tried to be there for me. I did the same to Tony and Tim, and... It was a way to protect myself. It's no excuse for me treating all of you like crap, and I'm sorry.<br/>
<br/>
As for the other thing you said, I know that I have more room in my heart to love you.. if this is something we both truly want. </span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">Oh, and Gibbs.. Kitten? Tony and McGee will have a field day with the nickname.. Much less with the broken rules, and with us. Do you think you can stand their teasing? And not end up giving them brain damage from smacking them too much? </span></span></span></i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">There was a teasing glint in her eyes as she turned the computer back to him.</span></span><br/>
<span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px"><br/>
~THREE WEEKS LATER~<br/>
<br/>
She had just been released from the hospital after being given the final word on her condition. There was no getting around it.. She was deaf. She and her doctor had discussed trying surgery. But the procedures they had found, wouldn't be enough to repair the damage. They had also discussed trying hearing aids, but again, the damage to her ear and hearing was much too severe. And in the end, the diagnosis was final. She was deaf, and her balance issues were permanent, too. The doctor had suggested getting a service<br/>
 dog, and taking ASL, American Sign Language classes.</span></span></span><br/><br/><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px">And had even given her paperwork and phone numbers to get the ball rolling. The brunette had taken a few hours to get her head together, before she knew what she had to do. She and Gibbs had been spending time together off and on each night while she was finishing her time in the hospital, and he, and the rest of her team knew that today was supposed to be her final exam before she was released.<br/>
<br/>
~THREE HOURS AFTER FINAL DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT~<br/>
<br/>
Kate had taken a cab from the hospital, and had spent the last three hours walking around town, with her bag of clothes and tablet, and everything else from the hospital, on her arm, as she took time to get used to walking with a cane, and took the time to get her head together. She had promised to go to NCIS and let the team know what the results were, once the appointment was over, but she couldn't. She had needed some time to think. To mourn the loss of what had been a promising career. Her career at NCIS was officially over.<br/>
<br/>
Though it felt like it had barely even begun. But that was just how life worked itself out sometimes. She was lucky to even be alive. The brunette pulled out her cell phone and called for a cab, using the app that her doctor had showed her how to download to her phone. She put in her current location, and then her address, and was glad when the cab arrived 30 minutes later. They got to her apartment and she typed in a message on the tablet and showed the driver. </span></span></span><i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">I need you to keep the meter running. I need to go inside <br/>
and get a few things, and then I need you to bring me to this address... and then back to here... my home.</span></span></span></i><br/><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px"><br/>
After seeing the driver's nod, she exited the cab as quickly</span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px"> as she was able, with her balance issues and her cane, and went into her apartment. She got out her gun and badge, and emptied her bag of everything but her tablet and stylus, her wallet, keys, phone, gun and badge. 20 minutes later, she made her way out to the cab. Her cab fare was going to be a lot, about $80 but she was prepared for it, and had taken out $200 in tens and twenties before her appointment. </span></span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span style="font-size: 15px">The 20 minutes in her apartment, had been where she had made sure she had the messages.<br/>
<br/>
She had recorded some for Gibbs, Tony, Tim, Ziva and Ducky that morning, before her appointment. One of her neighbor's had come over and she had asked them to help her make sure her voice was at a normal volume as she recorded her messages for all of them. It had just been a precaution, in case the worse happened. And it had. Kate exited her apartment once more and got back into the cab. </span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">And before long, she was on her way to NCIS and it would be time for her to start her new life. 20 minutes later, they pulled up at NCIS, and she grabbed her bag and cane.<br/>
<br/>
And slowly made her way inside the building. She smiled and nodded at those who greeted her, and when they talked, she motioned with her free hand, to her ears as a reminder. When people started to get embarrassed, she waved it off, showed her badge, and then made it through security. It wasn't long before she was in the elevator and on her way to the bullpen. Once the doors opened, she saw all heads in the room turn in her direction. And when that happened, she walked slowly across the room, leaning on her cane for support, until she stood in front of Gibbs's desk. <br/>
<br/>
Kate pulled her tablet out of the bag, and typed in a quick message. </span></span></span><i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">Can you have Ducky come down here? I want all of you to hear this. </span></span></span></i><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)">When Gibbs nodded, she watched as he got on his desk phone and while he did that, she cleared the message off her screen and then pulled up the voice recorder app. She pushed a few more buttons and then there was a blinking green light on the tablet screen as her messages began to play. Once that happened, as the words filled the room, she got the sense that everyone had shut up to listen. <br/>
<br/>
While that happened, she pulled out her SIG-Sauer P228 and badge and set them both down on Gibbs's desk beside the tablet, and looked him in the eyes. Without a word between the two of them, she nodded, gave him a sad smile, and then turned and walked away, heading for the elevator using her cane</span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px">. As she passed Ducky who came out <br/>
of the elevator, she gave him too, a sad smile, and then stepped into the elevator and left. </span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">She let out a shaky breath once she was in the elevator, and once she got to the main floor, exited the elevator, made her way through the front door and headed for her cab.</span></span><br/>
<span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px"><br/>
"Ducky, I know that we haven't known each other for very long, only two years. But since we met, you've been like a father figure to me. I feel much closer to you than to <br/>
my own father. Your colorful stories, your kindness and knowledge is something that always blows me away. My own father died when I was young. He was a firefighter<br/>
in Indianapolis, and was killed in a fire of his own making when he was drunk one night and left the oven on. It ended up taking my mother, too. My brothers, Rachel and I, <br/>
were all at a friend's house that night."<br/>
<br/>
"We didn't find out about our parents until the following morning. My brothers, Rachel and I, were raised by my mother's sister, who passed shortly after I turned 18. But anyway, you're family, Ducky. And I'm going to miss you. I got my final test results from the doctor and well.. let's just say, I hope it doesn't take you guys long to get used <br/>
to Agent David, if you haven't already. I love you Ducky, and I'll miss you...."</span></span></span><i><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px"> <br/>
</span></span></span></i><br/><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">A moment of silence filled the room, and then the next message started.....</span></span></span><br/><br/><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">"Ziva, I don't know you, not really. All I know about you, is what some of my Interpol and CIA contacts told me before Ari shot me, and a little of what Gibbs and Tim have told me. I'm sorry that you had to kill your brother for me. For Gibbs. I can't tell you how much it means to me, that you would do something so.. difficult.. so... life changing. I know that you also protected me while I was in the coma, so, thank you for that. I know that you'll probably say you were just doing your job, but... it means a lot to me. I'm sorry that you lost your brother."<br/>
<br/>
"That you lost your home, and what remains of your family and belongings, because of me. I don't how long it's going to take for me to adjust to the new life that I'm going to have moving forward, but I hope at some point, that the two of us can meet face to face, for real this time.. While I'm awake, and maybe we can get to know each other and be friends. If that would be too hard because of Ari, I understand and I won't bother you.. But Ziva... do me a favor and take care of these guys. They're all special in their own ways."<br/>
<br/>
Another moment of silence filled the room, and then a third message began to play.<br/>
</span></span><br/>
<span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px">"Tim, you're like the little brother I always wanted. Hell, you're like the brother I wanted, period. My own brothers and I don't talk. The three of them and I parted ways a long time ago after our parents passed. My sister and I are somewhat close but we only talk once a month, and only see each other once a year. Anyway, </span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">I really liked knowing that </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)">I could choose you, that I could choose all of you as my family. To be the ones that I love and counted on, and to know  the feeling was mutual, even if I was horrible at showing it."<br/>
<br/>
"I know that Tony and I teased you about your writing, and about everything else, and I hope you understand it wasn't meant to hurt you. That was how I showed my affection for you. I was always a hardass with all of you, because I was afraid of getting close to all of you. But it's too late for that. You guys are family. And Tim... Check your bottom desk drawer, you know.. the one you never open. Inside you'll find two things and I'm sure once I explain what I want from you, you'll do my request. </span></span></span><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px">You'll find a receipt that shows I bought a copy of your book."<br/>
<br/>
"I got it at the bookstore by my apartment. You'll also find my copy of your book in there. Now, if what I'm about to expect you to do isn't automatically obvious, it should be. I want a personal inscription from the author himself, on the inside of the</span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px"> book jacket. And the next time I see you, I want my book back. And Tim, no matter what anyone says.. Keep writing. You have a talent for it...."<br/>
<br/>
Another moment of silence, and then the fourth message..</span></span><br/>
<br/>
<span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">"Tony, I owe you an apology. I'm sorry. For not being a better partner. For not being a better friend. </span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px">I've treated you like crap from the moment I joined the team. I always gave you a hard time, and I blamed you for a lot of things that were not your fault and had nothing to do with you. I'm sorry, for not trying to see past the class clown act that you put on all the time for everyone. I know that it's a defense mechanism. It's a way to protect yourself, to make everyone think that nothing's wrong, and to keep anyone from getting too close."<br/>
<br/>
"I know because I acted like a hardass as my own defense mechanism, to keep people from getting too close to me. Because I was trying to protect myself. Just like you were protecting yourself. I've lost a lot in my life. A lot of my family, a lot of friends, and I didn't want to risk getting close to all of you and then losing all of you. But, I guess that happened anyway. You were a good partner, Tony. For all of the crap you said and pulled, I couldn't ask for a better partner, and friend. A</span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">nd I hope that now that I see who you really are, we can be friends. </span></span></span><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)">For real this time...."</span></span></span><br/><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><br/>
<span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px">Another moment of silence, and then the fifth and final message...</span></span><br/>
<span class="fixed-color" style="color:#99ff99"><span style="font-size: 15px"><br/>
"Gibbs... There's so much I want to say to you. That I need to say to you.. And I will... but only when it's just the two of us and a bottle of Bourbon or Vodka in your basement. The only thing I'm going to say in this message is... Kitten? Really? I'd pay to see the looks on DiNozzo and McGee's faces when they hear this message and find out that rule <br/>
12 has been superseded by rule 5, and that 'Kitten' is your</span></span><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"><span style="font-size: 15px"> nickname for me. Anyway, text me later and I'll give you the details of what went down at</span></span></span><span style="font-size: 15px"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'"><span class="fixed-color" style="color:rgb(153, 255, 153)"> my appointment today."<br/>
<br/>
"This is the last message on the tablet, so once I finally shut the hell up, you can turn this thing off, and hang onto the tablet for me, and when you get a chance, feel free to drop it off at my place, or have one of the others do so. I'm gonna crash for a few hours. I need the sleep. If any of you come over, make sure to text me first, or risk getting shot. I might have had to give up my service weapon, but that doesn't mean that I don't keep a Glock 19 under my pillow in case of emergencies. Anyway, I'll miss you guys.. Talk to you later... Kate..."</span></span></span>