Struggling was as futile as it had been when he'd fought against him the first time. Dorian wasn't weak. He wasn't frail. He had a fine set of abs and he could bench press his own body weight, at least. He knew how to defend himself, but it didn't seem enough. Nothing seemed enough to keep his assailant off of him. He tried to lash out with his other arm when the one was deterred, but both were soon pinned. Dorian tried to throw his weight around, but the other had him pinned on his back. Though that didn't even seem to last very long before he ended up on his stomach, face first into the soft flannel sheets. His bedding ended up on the floor and his breath caught in his lungs when Kade's body was flush against his own.<br/><br/>Desire rose unbidden within him, and he hated himself for it. He hated that he was so responsive against such an assault. It wasn't right. Kade's robe and his own pajamas were all that were between them. He tried to buck up, to throw him off, but the strength was leaving him. He was still groggy from sleep, lethargic. Was this just another vicious nightmare? Could Kade really have gotten to him no matter where he went? It sent chills down his spine, both delighted and terrified. He closed his eyes and went lax under him, trying to think. What could he do? What did the other want with him? When Kade put more of his weight on his body, Dorian's breath caught and he flushed. God, no...<br/><br/>"What I<i>want </i>is for you get the hell out of my life!" he hissed out, rage rising swift on the heels of his desire. "What I<i>want </i>is for you to get that I<i>don't </i>want you!" Lies. All of it. Well, not entirely a lie. "Christ, just kill me already, then! If I'm such a monster just send me to hell where I belong!" Frustration made him try to throw him off again, all of it feeble, pointless. He was completely at the other's mercy. "Even if I quit my job, I could never have a life. Not with all those monsters out there. Not with all the victims." He pressed his forehead into the pillow, hating himself. Reading had helped his depression, but it was still there, and now that his tormentor had returned, it reared its ugly head once more. "The last thing I want is for the person I love to be taken from me. So leave me alone!"<br/><br/>Though he loved no one. He wouldn't allow himself to. He didn't have feelings for Kade, either. The other was infuriating and impossible, and so utterly gorgeous, but he was also terrifying and nothing had blossomed there. But if he allowed himself to feel, there were possibilities. With others. But it wasn't possible.