Despite his best efforts, Blue's shrunken stomach couldn't hold all of the food Eivind had piled onto his plate. After eating about half of the provided amount, Blue sat back on the couch and put a hand on his flat abdomen, trying to hold back a mild nausea as his body adjusted to the fat and grease from the bacon and fried potatoes. Eivind's comments about his pack were succinct and lacked any kind of emotional connection, but for once Blue wasn't interested in prying. As far as he was concerned, Eivind's lukewarm attitude toward the opinions of the other wolves worked in Blue's favor, strange as it might have been. He nodded slowly and let his eyes wander around the wolf's home, once again taking in the numerous furs scattered around the living room. He mused that these must have been things that Eivind had caught and killed himself, perhaps he had skinned them as well. It seemed unlikely that a man who lived in the woods and hunted regularly wouldn't have knowledge of such things, although Blue didn't have the stomach for it himself.<br/><br/>His companion mentioned a shower and Blue's head snapped back to attention. "You have a shower?" he asked dubiously, forgetting for a moment that not all wolves were river-bathing barbarians à la Lofgren. "Yes, a shower would be nice," he whispered, hoping that with another pill and Eivind's assistance he would be able to make it upstairs. The thought of lying down on a real bed was incredibly enticing as well. He hoped it was soft, as his accommodations in the shed (and the cabin when he had been allowed inside) had been hard, cold, and unforgiving on Blue's angular body.<i>If I sleep in his bed, where is he going to sleep?</i>Blue thought to himself, narrowing his eyes at Eivind as the curious concept slunk around in his head. Eivind hadn't left him alone even on the couch; he had no reason to believe that the bed would be any different. He was still unsure as to the nature of Eivind's kindness. Was it some kind of unexplained altruism, had he merely taken pity on the battered and fragmented human? Or was there a deeper element to Eivind's actions? A physical one? Blue recoiled at the thought, hoping he hadn't been taken by another wolf with a loose hold on the definition of consent, but Eivind had seemed rather offended each time Blue implied that he only wanted him for sex. Maybe Eivind wasn't even interested in men. Was gender something werewolves even considered? His interactions with Lofgren's pack had convinced Blue that a wolf's idea of sexuality had more to do with power than with the sex of the person they were currently fucking, but maybe all wolves weren't like Lofgren's. Blue was swimming in an ocean of maybes, and even he was starting to feel like he was drowning in endless questions.<br/><br/>"Yes, I think another one would help, especially if I'm going to make it up that fucking staircase," Blue groaned, sitting up as his stomach finally began to settle. He hoped he didn't vomit later, as he didn't want Eivind to have to clean up after him. Perhaps the pain meds would help. At the very least, they would help him not care as he puked up the food Eivind had made for him.<br/><br/>When Eivind took hold of the fishing line that Alden had used as makeshift thread to hold Blue together, the boy couldn't help but stare at it, mixed feelings of disgust and uncomfortable appreciation. Although he did not mourn Alden, he felt somewhat indebted to him. Alden's attempts to piece Blue back together had been sloppy and dangerous, but he very well could have let the boy bleed out on the grass without a second thought. Blue did not voice these musings, thinking that Eivind wouldn't react positively to knowing that he held some amount of gratitude in his heart for the monster who had tortured him. "I think so, yes," Blue mumbled in response to his rhetorical question, although he was sure Eivind wasn't looking for any kind of input from him.<br/><br/>The wolf gathered the painkiller and antibiotic for him and handed them over along with a full glass of water. He couldn't help but notice that Eivind stopped a few steps short of him and held the pills out at a distance, forcing Blue to reach forward and grab them himself. "Thanks," Blue said before taking a large gulp of water into his mouth, sliding the pills in between his lips and swallowing them down. Within the next few minutes the oxycodone would once again flood his bloodstream and leave Blue without the aching in his side. He was excited for it, but he was even more excited to take this promised shower and to sleep for however long he wanted to without being interrupted by a hungry cock looking to fill one of his holes.<br/><br/>He reached for the pair of boxers that Eivind had brought downstairs for him and grabbed them before looking to Eivind. "I'll put these on after the shower. Doesn't make much sense to do it now," he said softly. He bit his lower lip and used the arm of the couch to push himself up, albeit shakily. "I'm sorry I didn't eat everything," he said, inhaling deeply as he came to his feet. "I guess I can't eat as much as I used to," Blue laughed, vaguely remembering the days when his sisters referred to him as a human garbage disposal as he shoveled down plate after plate of home cooked food without ever gaining a pound.<br/><br/>"I'll need your help getting up the stairs. I think I can walk all right, but my balance is still a little off, and I'm tired. Being in your bed sounds extremely appealing right now." When Blue realized what he had said, a bright red glow swept across his cheeks. He hadn't intended for his comment to come off as suggestive, and he hoped Eivind didn't take it that way. Although Blue was reluctantly attracted to the hard lines of Eivind's body, and he had already seen the potential of the wolf's handsome cock, the thought of having sex did nothing for him other than encourage the nausea to return. He wondered if it was possible for Blue to ever truly have sex again. Rape survivors were capable of moving forward with their lives, and the possibility of recovery was always there, difficult thought it could be to achieve. But Blue hadn't even had a single moment to truly process what had happened to him or what might still happen. Eivind was a wolf like the rest of them; sex was bound to be aggressive and unpleasant. Romance didn't seem to be a concept among canines.<br/><br/>But it didn't matter. There was still the chance that Eivind wasn't interested in him that way, and all of Blue's thoughts and worries were for naught.<br/><br/>"I'm ready to go when you are," he said, his eyes trailing down from Eivind's face to his strong neck and the gentle rising and falling of his pectoral muscles.<i>Fuck</i>.