When Lucio recoiled from their kiss, Ansel felt like the wind had been taken out of him. He couldn’t help but gasp slightly to catch his breath, to try and calm the pounding in his chest. His name sounded absolutely beautiful coming out of Lucio’s lips, in that sultry English accent. He wanted to hear Lucio say it over and over again. In husky whispers, in boisterous yells, in ringing laughter. And softly, sadly, like Lucio did now, with raw emotion shakily holding up each syllable.<br/><br/>“Lucio, being terrified, that’s how this whole thing works,” Ansel said. “I’ve spent the last twenty years ignoring any kind of romantic commitment. Even Petra . . . I was with her because it seemed like something I was supposed to do, and that obligation just stifled me. I’m not trying to be with you because I think it’s the right thing. Objectively, it is very much the wrong thing,” he laughed slightly, trying to buy time to find his words amongst the bourbon-laced haze. “You make me feel, Lucio. Not just lust, although it is wonderful, but actual human emotions. I don’t know if you’ve picked up on it or not but I’m not really known for my vast emotional range.”<br/><br/>The professor sighed, his fingers continuing to draw invisible lines along Lucio’s spine. “You fit me so perfectly. Our bodies, our sensibilities. I feel like I could talk to you forever, or sit with you in silence and experience an innocent contentedness unlike anything I’ve ever known. I could fuck you until our bodies give out from exhaustion or lie with you unmoving until our skeletons turn to dust. It doesn’t matter what I do as long as I have you on my arm. That is the most fulfilling thing I’ve ever experienced.”<br/><br/>The air around him was beginning to feel stuffy, his skin warm to the touch. Ansel pulled away just enough to remove his sweater and the underlying t-shirt, tossing them carelessly onto the bed before settling himself close to Lucio once more, their bare torsos pressed against one another. “You’re afraid of this. And that’s okay. Telling you to ignore your emotions would definitely be against my professional advice. So don’t ignore your emotions, Lucio. Any of them.” He pressed a chaste kiss on Lucio’s forehead and released him, taking slow steps toward the bed while keeping eye contact with the younger man. He stripped himself down completely, removing his shoes, pants, and underwear and lay back on the bed, one arm behind his head while the other was stretched out, reaching and inviting.<br/><br/>“Come here. Lie with me.”