I was painfully shy as a child. In high school I would avoid participating in class discussions. I was too afraid to talk to anyone but my closest friends~ I would think about being less shy, wanting the courage not only to ask a girl out, but to speak up in class and say what I was thinking. Yet, it never happened. Fears showed themselves in such self-conscious questions as, " What will other people think?  What if she says no?" I felt a dark presence in my mind holding me back. This shyness continued into college. One day, the question occurred to me: Is life shy? The thought surprised me ! Think of the leaves bursting out in the spring time, the bird singing at dawn, the sheer number of different forms of life, all expressing the wideness and scope of divine life. There's nothing shy about it. Life is everywhere and attention-grabbing  . So, if my creator isn't shy about all the life that needs expressing, I don't need to be either. I realized that if I wanted to overcome fear and shyness, I would have to put this law of life into practice~ Shyness, fear, and loneliness were hindering me from living my life as life: God wanted me to live it. Therefore, I decided to live how life saw me. One example: I wrote a note to a girl, asking her out on a date. Even as I was writing it, the fears of disaffirmation and unworthiness came to me. This time however, instead of shrinking back and hiding from the fear, I put the note in the campus mail in spite of myself. I thought: whether she says yes or no, it's still right for me not to be shy. I can live with the confidence sent from the source of my life. The girl saw me in class the next day and told me that she would love to go out with me. I should not have been so surprised! Bit by bit, I was proving that the limited view of myself no longer had control over me.  After college, I worked as a newspaper reporter, earned an advanced degree in theater, became a productive writer (a lifelong dream), met a special woman whom I married, and even got a job teaching at a university. The writer was shy as a child because of  _  .
awareness that life is shy lack of courage to speak out in public fear of others' attitude and reaction failure in his participation in class discussion