 Now you guys might know me as a peppy, big personality in a small package type of character. But believe it or not, I'm not actually this wired 24 hours a day. The real reason that employees at Linus Media Group are allowed to roll in anywhere between 9.30 and 10 a.m. every day, is that I am not a morning person. But, it's 2017. Why struggle in the morning like some kind of Neanderthal, when technology can help you wake up like a god? So here's five weird gadgets to help you get your ass out of bed in the morning. And here's a message from our sponsor, Sennheiser, for helping us make this video. Their new HD1 wireless in-ears feature a sleek design, great sound performance, Bluetooth 4.1, aptX, and take-anywhere mobility. Check them out at the link below. I'm basically in an abusive relationship with the snooze button. In exchange for my gentle, or sometimes less gentle caress, it gives me more time away from the tedium of reality. I know that I'm suffering in the long term by not just getting up, but the call of the void is just so alluring. But what if there was no snooze? Well, the ruggy is an alarm clock that's more like a bath mat. When your alarm goes off, it rings and rings and rings until you actually get out of bed and stand on the mat. By default, you have to stand on the ruggy for three seconds for it to turn off, but if you think you're the kind of person who's liable to, you know, just roll back into bed and close your eyes again, or scroll on your phone instead of actually getting up, you can use the ruggy's included software to increase the standing time to up to 30 seconds. And if you step off of it, the time resets. You can also upload an mp3 that will play after the alarm, though I'm not sure why you can't just change the alarm sound, and the ruggy website has a bunch of inspiring affirmations to choose from. My personal favorite is, I acknowledge my own self-worth and my confidence is soaring. And there are some intentionally funny ones too, like the, Ready to kick some ice? Come on, you can do it. Do it now and have a wonderful day. But realistically, I would definitely find a way around that one. I need something a little more unpredictable. Meet everyone's favorite self-driving do-disturber, Clocky. Now, Clocky actually does have a snooze button, but you're only allowed to press it once before he drives himself off your nightstand and peels off down the hall. This lovable rabble rouser is guaranteed to get you up and at him and scare the ever-loving piss out of your pets. He comes in a bunch of fun colors. James chose the more expensive chrome version, just to screw with me, but you can get whatever works for you. Setup is about as easy as could be with intuitively labeled buttons, and you can even turn off Clocky's driving action by simply poking him in the eye. The only drag is that he requires four sold separately AAA batteries, and for $40 for a clock on wheels, I'd personally appreciate a rechargeable lithium ion inside, maybe with a magnetic charging cable so that he can still be free to hit the open road. So I'm looking forward to a V2. But, Clocky's morning shenanigans are also easily countered. So maybe you're one of those weird cold shower types looking for the most hardcore possible wake-up solution. Maybe you want an alarm clock that actually electrifies you. Yes, my friends, the Pavlok Shock Clock delivers an electrifying jolt to your body, so you will literally jump out of bed. The idea is that the watch's beeps, vibes, and, yes, shocks, will give you an adrenaline-fueled start to your day, and, actually, the Pavlok can also be used to break or form habits. Oh, okay, yep. Yep, okay, that's good. Yep, okay, I'm awake, I'm awake. Jesus. So pressing on the watch will deliver from one to five shocks of an intensity of your choosing. The highest setting is about as painful, by the way, as the $130 price tag. So, theoretically, the idea here is that you can use it to condition yourself to associate your cravings for sugar or your nasty thoughts about your co-workers with a short, sharp zap. Is that real? Pavlok recommends that you set aside five minutes per day to shock yourself while you perform your bad habit for five to ten days, or some of them can actually even be automated thanks to integration with If This, Then That. So you can get shocked whenever you buy stuff you don't need on Amazon, use social media, or, hell, every 30 minutes just because. And if you're a nail-biter or a compulsive finger-sniffer, you can actually even program it to shock you whenever you move your hand up to your face. Moving on to something a little less masochistic, the Phillips Wake Up Light is probably the most civilized item on our list, gently rousing you from slumber by simulating the rising sun. Over a 20 to 40 minute period, depending on your preference, the light gradually changes color from red to yellow, becoming brighter, and even playing some gentle nature sounds as it reaches your wake up time. The idea is that the bulb's light will signal your body to begin suppressing melatonin, the hormone responsible for regulating sleep and wakefulness, so that you'll wake up in the morning feeling more like a professional YouTuber and less like his evil twin, sourpants McGrog face. The light's got a well-organized touch interface, you can snooze your alarm by touching anywhere on the surface, and, get this, you can even use it as a lamp. Brilliant! Literally. And, you can also use it backwards, simulating sunset to help you unwind at the end of the day. Now, $135 might sound a little steep, but, if you live in a part of the country where raw turns its back on you for nine months out of the year, the Wake Up Light is also supposed to help fight seasonal affective disorder. I just wish its clean look wasn't upset by the non-removable FM antenna. Bringing us, finally, to number five. If you guys are anything like me, you spent your entire childhood, as well as an unhealthy portion of your adolescence, dreaming of being woken up by a giant Rube Goldberg machine, like some kind of kooky inventor. Well, for adults with floor space, disposable income, and no chance of having any visitors, dreams can come true. Oh, what the hell? What's wrong with you? Yeah, obviously, that didn't work at all. We just saw this thing on Amazon and wanted to buy it. It's not an alarm clock. And you know what else isn't an alarm clock? Squarespace! Thanks to Squarespace for sponsoring this episode of LTT. They've got 24-7 support via live chat and email, so you can get your own website set up quickly and easily. Squarespace starts at just 12 bucks a month, and you get a free domain if you buy it for the year, and all of their gorgeous templates feature responsive design, so your website will scale to look great on any device, whether it's a computer or a mobile phone. Cover pages lets you set up a beautiful one-page online presence in minutes. Everyone can publish content in Apple News format directly from the Squarespace blog module. They've got their logo designer, and everything is cloud-based, so anyone can do it. You just drag in your photos, you write in your text, and boom, you've got a functional, reliable website. So head over to squarespace.com forward slash LTT and get a free trial, then use offer code LTT to get 10% off your first purchase. So thanks for watching, guys, if this video sucked, you know what to do, but if it was awesome, hit the like button, get subscribed, maybe consider checking out where to buy some of the handy wake-up tech we featured today at the link in the video description. The PavLock in particular will definitely get you out of bed, by the way, and I think that's pretty much it. Right, we've got our merch store link down there, as well as our community forum, which you should totally join. Wait. Hold on, hold on. I know it's coming.