and oh god , i 'm absolutely stuffed with him , he 's all the way in me , surely he ca n't go deeper- but then he grips my hips and holds me aloft somehow and i do n't know how he manages it , but he does , and he drags his hips back , pulling out , and i knot my fingers in the sheets beside me , my mouth falling open , eyes widening , and then he thrusts into me .