Is a person really committed if she has a boyfriend?
Question

                I have a question regarding people that sin a lot but at the time they are very practising. My friends are very knowledgeable and practising but they have boyfriends whom they chat to and at time meet. They have not fornicated but they do have a lot of intimacy e.g hugging, kissing etc. I do not know what to tell them, as they are aware it is wrong and regret after they have done such things. Is the ibadah od such a person accepted? Is there salah accepted and will they be rewarded. There excuse is that they are too emotionally attached and that they will be marrying that person. Please advice.
Praise be to Allah.
    The people who should be most committed to obeying the 
    commands of Allaah and heeding His prohibitions are those whom He has 
    blessed with guidance, knowledge of Islam and following the path of 
    religious commitment, so how can people like these friends whom you describe 
    as being religiously committed agree to follow in the footsteps of the 
    shaytaan by doing that which Allaah has forbidden? Should they not be 
    grateful for the blessing that Allaah has bestowed upon them by guiding them 
    to Islam and religious commitment, so they should be the best examples of 
    righteousness to others? 

    As for the fact that these friends of yours know that they 
    are doing something haraam, that counts for nothing here. Who says that mere 
    knowledge is what prevents a person from falling into sin? Didn’t Iblees 
    know that what his Lord enjoined upon him was true? Didn’t the Jews know 
    that the Prophet was true? And so on and so forth. Allaah, may He be 
    exalted, says (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “Do they not travel in the land, and see what was the end 
    of those before them? They were superior to them in strength, and they 
    tilled the earth and populated it in greater numbers than these (pagans) 
    have done, and there came to them their Messengers with clear proofs. 
    Surely, Allaah wronged them not, but they used to wrong themselves”

    [al-Room 30:9] 

    “And they belied them (those Ayaat) wrongfully and 
    arrogantly, though their ownselves were convinced thereof [i.e. those 
    (Ayaat) are from Allaah, and Moosa (Moses) is the Messenger of Allaah in 
    truth, but they disliked to obey Moosa (Moses), and hated to believe in his 
    Message of Monotheism]. So see what was the end of the Mufsidoon 
    (disbelievers, and disobedient to Allaah, evildoers liars)”

    [al-Naml 27:14]

    But the point here is that the one who knows, and exhorts 
    others, and speaks, bears a greater responsibility, and his going against 
    the knowledge that he has is worse and more reprehensible. 

    Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “Enjoin you Al-Birr (piety and righteousness and each and 
    every act of obedience to Allaah) on the people and you forget (to practise 
    it) yourselves, while you recite the Scripture! Have you then no sense?”

    [al-Baqarah 2:44] 

    “O you who believe! Why do you say that which you do not 
    do?

    3. Most hateful it is with Allaah that you say that which 
    you do not do”

    [al-Saff 61:2-3]

    What you must do is remind your friends of their duties, as 
    Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “Therefore remind (men) in case the reminder profits 
    (them).

    10. The reminder will be received by him who fears 
    (Allaah)”

    [al-A’la 87:9-10] 

    “Verily, those who are Al-Muttaqoon (the pious), when an 
    evil thought comes to them from Shaytaan (Satan), they remember (Allaah), 
    and (indeed) they then see (aright)”

    [al-A’raaf 7:201]

    Remind them that this is abhorrent for any Muslim, male or 
    female, so how about if the Muslim woman is one who outwardly makes a 
    display of commitment to the religion of Allaah, and sets an example for 
    people, and calls people to Allaah?  

    In Saheeh al-Bukhaari (3267) and Saheeh Muslim 
    (2989) it is narrated that Usaamah ibn Zayd (may Allaah be pleased with him) 
    said: I heard the Messenger of Allaah  (peace and blessings of Allaah be 
    upon him) say: “A man will be brought on the Day of Resurrection and thrown 
    into the Fire; his intestines will spill forth and he will go around them as 
    a donkey goes around the millstone. The people of Hell will gather around 
    him and will say: O So and so, what is the matter with you? Did you not 
    enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil? He will say: Yes, but I used to 
    enjoin good and not do it, and I used to forbid evil and do it.” 

    And it is narrated that the Prophet  (peace and blessings 
    of Allaah be upon him) said: “The likeness of a scholar who teaches good to 
    the people but forgets about himself is that of a lamp that illuminates the 
    people but burns itself.” Narrated by al-Khateeb in Iqtida’ al-‘Ilm 
    (49) and elsewhere; classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’ 
    no. 5831. 

    ‘Abd-Allaah ibn al-Mubaarak (may Allaah have mercy on him) 
    said: 

    I have seen sins deaden hearts and persisting in them may 
    lead to humiliation 

    Forsaking sin brings life to the heart and it is better for 
    your soul to go against whims and desires

    Does anything corrupt the religion more than kings and bad 
    priests and monks

    Who sell their souls but did not make any gain and did not 
    sell them for the right price

    Because they are like one that feeds upon a corpse and every 
    wise man knows such as one is a loser. 

    As for the excuse of emotional attachment towards the 
    boyfriend, this is the essence of whims and desires which lead one to doom, 
    Allaah forbid. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “Have you seen him who takes his own lust (vain desires) 
    as his ilaah (god)? And Allaah knowing (him as such), left him astray, and 
    sealed his hearing and his heart, and put a cover on his sight. Who then 
    will guide him after Allaah? Will you not then remember?”

    [al-Jaathiyah 45:23]

    Qataadah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: He does not 
    feel attracted to anything but it will control him, because he does not fear 
    Allaah. Tafseer al-Tabari (22/76). 

    Allaah describes chaste believing women as those who avoid 
    having boyfriends. He says (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “And whoever of you have not the means wherewith to wed 
    free believing women, they may wed believing girls from among those (slaves) 
    whom your right hands possess, and Allaah has full knowledge about your 
    Faith; you are one from another. Wed them with the permission of their own 
    folk (guardians, Awliyaa’ or masters) and give them their Mahr according to 
    what is reasonable; they (the above said slave-girls) should be chaste, not 
    committing illegal sex, nor taking boyfriends”

    [al-Nisa’ 4:25]

    Al-musaafihaat (translated here 
    as “committing illegal sex”) means women who fornicate or commit adultery, 
    who commit immoral actions. As for taking boyfriends, this refers to women 
    who make friends with men and take them as close friends, as Ibn ‘Abbaas and 
    others among the salaf said. [See: Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 2/261]. 

    By the same token, Allaah describes the chaste men who seek 
    what is permissible and good. He says (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “Made lawful to you this day are At‑Tayyibaat [all kinds 
    of Halaal (lawful) foods, which Allaah has made lawful (meat of slaughtered 
    eatable animals, milk products, fats, vegetables and fruits)]. The food 
    (slaughtered cattle, eatable animals) of the people of the Scripture (Jews 
    and Christians) is lawful to you and yours is lawful to them. (Lawful to you 
    in marriage) are chaste women from the believers and chaste women from those 
    who were given the Scripture (Jews and Christians) before your time when you 
    have given their due Mahr (bridal-money given by the husband to his wife at 
    the time of marriage), desiring chastity (i.e. taking them in legal wedlock) 
    not committing illegal sexual intercourse, nor taking them as girlfriends. 
    And whosoever disbelieves in Faith, [i.e. in the Oneness of Allaah and in 
    all the other Articles of Faith i.e. His (Allaah’s) Angels, His Holy Books, 
    His Messengers, the Day of Resurrection and Al‑Qadar (Divine 
    Preordainments)], then fruitless is his work; and in the Hereafter he will 
    be among the losers”

    [al-Maa’idah 5:5]

    Ibn Katheer (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Just as He 
    stipulated that women should be chaste, He also stipulated the same for men, 
    which means that men should also be chaste. Hence He says “not committing 
    illegal sexual intercourse”, which refers to those who commit 
    fornication or adultery, who would not refrain from any sin and would 
    indulge in sin whenever the opportunity arises, “nor taking them as 
    girlfriends,” i.e., mistresses with whom they satisfy their sexual 
    desires. End quote. 

    Tafseer Ibn Katheer (3/43) 

    For more information on the seriousness of these types of 
    haraam relationships, and the attitude of Islam towards them, please see the 
    answers to questions no. 59907,
    47405,
    36618, and many answers in 
    the section on morals and manners. 

    And Allaah knows best.