How to treat a wife from among the People of the Book
Question

                The ayah in surah maida about not taking the jews and christians as awliya does this mean friends or protectors because some people say it means just helpers but in the englishtranslate this to mean friends if it does mean friends how do befriend are non-muslim wife or treat her accordingto shariah.
Praise be to Allah.
    Interacting with Jews, Christians and all other kuffaar is 
    subject to guidelines and regulations that are set out in Islamic sharee’ah. 
    These guidelines include the following: 

    Firstly: 

    It is permissible to speak with the kaafirs and to discuss 
    permissible matters with him. 

    Secondly: 

    It is not permissible to take the kuffaar as close friends 
    (awliya’). Taking them as close friends may happen in many ways, such as 
    mixing with them, feeling comfortable with them, living with them, taking 
    them as close friends, loving them, preferring them over the believers, and 
    so on. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “You (O Muhammad) will not find any people who believe in 
    Allaah and the Last Day, making friendship with those who oppose Allaah and 
    His Messenger (Muhammad), even though they were their fathers or their sons 
    or their brothers or their kindred (people)”

    [al-Mujaadilah 58:22]

    Thirdly: 

    It is permissible to interact with the kuffaar to buy, sell, 
    lend and so on. It was narrated in saheeh reports that the Prophet  
    (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) borrowed a weapon from Safwaan 
    ibn Umayyah, and that he bought food from the Jews. 

    With regard to how to treat a wife from among the people of 
    the Book (i.e., a Jewish or Christian woman), Allaah says in His Book 
    (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “Allaah does not forbid you to deal justly and kindly with 
    those who fought not against you on account of religion nor drove you out of 
    your homes. Verily, Allaah loves those who deal with equity”

    [al-Mumtahanah 60:8]

    So it is permissible to treat a Jewish or Christian wife 
    justly and kindly, and there is nothing wrong with that; it does not come 
    under the heading of the type of close friendship and strong bonds that is 
    forbidden. 

    Al-Kaasaani said in Badaa’i al-Sanaa’i’ (2/270): 
It is not permissible for 
    a Muslim to marry a mushrik woman, because Allaah says (interpretation of 
    the meaning): 

    “And do not marry Al-Mushrikaat (idolatresses) till they 
    believe (worship Allaah Alone)”

    [al-Baqarah 2:221]

    But it is permissible to marry a woman from among the people 
    of the Book, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): 

    “(Lawful to you in marriage) are chaste women from the 
    believers and chaste women from those who were given the Scripture (Jews and 
    Christians) before your time”

    [al-Maa'idah 5:5]

    The difference is that the basic principle is that a Muslim 
    is not permitted to marry a kaafir, because marrying a kaafir woman and 
    mixing with her at the same time when there is religious animosity will not 
    produce the tranquility and love which are the basic purpose of marriage, 
    but it is permitted to marry a woman from among the People of the Book in 
    the hope that she will become Muslim, because she believes in the Books of 
    the Prophets and Messengers in general, but she does not believe in a 
    comprehensive and correct manner, because what she was taught is different 
    from what is real. It is likely that when the facts are pointed out to her, 
    she will accept them.  So her husband should call her to Islam and tell her 
    how things really are. So when a Muslim marries such a woman there is the 
    hope that she will become Muslim, so it is permissible to marry them for 
    this purpose. This is unlike the case of a mushrik woman, because by 
    choosing to associate others in worship with Allaah and not to believe in 
    the Prophets and Messengers, this indicates that she does not pay any 
    attention to proof and evidence and will not respond to da’wah, and will 
    rather continue to follow the way of her forefathers and to follow her whims 
    and desires. So there will remain that religious animosity which will not 
    produce the tranquility and love which are the basic purpose of marriage, so 
    it is not permissible to marry such a woman. 

    And he said in Haashiyat al-‘Adawi (1/273): 
The phrase “we forsake 
    those who disbelieve in You” means we cast aside any positive feelings 
    towards those who worship anyone other than You, and we will not love his 
    way or feel any inclination towards it. But this does mean that we are not 
    allowed to marry a woman from among the people of the Book, because marrying 
    her may attract her to the religion of Islam, as marriage is a type of 
    interacting with others and what is meant here is to hate the way of kufr. 

    For more information please see questions no.
    34559,
    11793,
    10342,
    26721,
    23325.