He wants to go back to his country but there is war there; is his wife obliged to obey him?
Question

                My dad went back to his country because he said he doesn't want to stay in a kafir country; he wants the family to come as well, but my mum doesn't want to go because she is saying my children have to finish their education and they are about to start university and she doesn't want to ruin it for them. My question is, is it a sin for my mum to not obey her husband and do what he wants her to do? Will she be punished for it? What do you think I should do, because my mum really doesn't want to go and her mum and sister are saying not to go there because their is war and so on.
Praise be to Allah.
      Firstly: 

    Staying in a kafir country is not permissible unless certain 
    conditions are met, the most important of which is that the person be 
    religiously committed and thus protected against whims and desires; he 
    should also have sufficient knowledge and insight that will protect him 
    against specious arguments; he should be able to practice his religion 
    openly; and he and his family should be safe. For more details please see 
    the answer to question no. 13363 
    and 27211. 

    Secondly: 

    The wife is obliged to obey her husband and move with him 
    wherever he moves, so long as she did not stipulate that her husband should 
    not take her out of her homeland or make her travel to a specific country, 
    or so long as moving with him will not cause her any obvious and 
    considerable harm, such as if he wants to move to a country where there is 
    war or it is thought most likely that she will encounter harm such as 
    imprisonment and the like. 

    Ibn Qudamah (may Allah have mercy on him) said: He may 
    travel with her, because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon 
    him) used to travel with his wives, unless it is a kind of travel in which 
    there is fear (of harm), in which case she does not have to do that. 

    End quote from al-Mughni (7/223) 

    And it says in Kashshaf al-Qina‘ (5/187): The 
    husband may travel with his wife, because the Prophet (blessings and peace 
    of Allah be upon him) and his Companions used to travel with their wives, 
    unless the travel involves fear or there is danger on the road or in the 
    land to which he wants to travel. In that case he does not have the right to 
    take her with him without her permission, because of the hadeeth, “There 
    should be neither harm nor reciprocating harm.” Or if she stipulated that 
    she should stay in her own land, in which case she is entitled to that 
    condition, because the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) 
    said: “The most deserving of conditions to be fulfilled are those by means 
    of which intimacy became permissible to you.” End quote. 

    She does not have the right to refuse to accompany her 
    husband because of the children’s education, because education may be 
    acquired in various places and through various means such as distance 
    learning and so on. So it is not permissible for her to disobey her husband 
    for the sake of her children. 

    Thirdly: 

    You have to obey your father and travel with him if he wants 
    that, so long as your travelling to his country will not pose a danger to 
    you. 

    It should be obvious to you that the father has rights and a 
    high status, and Allah has commanded us to honour our parents; He has 
    mentioned that alongside obedience to Him and affirmation of His Oneness 
    (Tawheed). Claiming that the father is not thinking of his children's best 
    interests is mistaken thinking in most cases, because of the natural 
    compassion that the father has for his children, but what the father thinks 
    is in the children's best religious or worldly interests may make him 
    overlook this compassion. Allah has commanded the father to protect his 
    children and guard them against that which may lead to doom and loss, as He 
    says (interpretation of the meaning):

    “O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families 
    against a Fire (Hell) whose fuel is men and stones, over which are 
    (appointed) angels stern (and) severe, who disobey not, (from executing) the 
    Commands they receive from Allah, but do that which they are commanded”

    [al-Tahreem 66:6] 

    And it was narrated from Ibn ‘Umar (may Allah be pleased with 
    him) that the Prophet (blessings and peace of Allah be upon him) said:

    “Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is responsible for 
    his flock. The ruler of the people is a shepherd and is responsible for his 
    flock. A man is the shepherd of his household and is responsible for his 
    flock. A woman is the shepherd of her husband’s house and children and is 
    responsible for her flock. The slave is the shepherd of his master’s wealth 
    and is responsible for it. Each of you is a shepherd and each of you is 
    responsible for his flock.”

    Narrated by al-Bukhari (7138) and Muslim (1829). 

    And al-Bukhari (7151) and Muslim (142) narrated that Ma‘qil 
    ibn Yasar al-Muzani (may Allah be pleased with him) said: 

    I heard the Messenger of Allah (blessings and peace of Allah 
    be upon him) say: “There is no person whom Allah puts in charge of others, 
    and when he dies he is insincere to his subjects, but Allah will forbid 
    Paradise to him.” 

    So it is no surprise that a father would flee with his 
    children from the land of kufr, fearing corruption and deviance for them, 
    and that he would prefer soundness of religious commitment to worldly 
    interests. If his move to his homeland is safe, then all the members of his 
    family are obliged to obey him and accompany him. 

    And Allah knows best.