When a Muslim says du’aa’, should he start with du’aa’ for himself or for others?
Question

                What should a Muslim do regarding du’a, should he start by making du’a for himself or for all Muslims first? I noticed the du’as in the holy Quraan start by self then others. Like in the following ayah: "Our Lord! Forgive us, and our brethren who came before us into the Faith, and leave not, in our hearts, rancor (or sense of injury) against those who have believed. Our Lord! Thou art indeed Full of Kindness, Most Merciful.".
Praise be to Allah.
    Firstly: 

    The custom of 
    ending recitation of one or more verses from the Qur’aan with the phrase 
    Sadaqa Allaahu’l-‘Azeem (Allaah the Almighty has spoken the truth) has 
    no basis in the Sunnah. We have discussed the ruling on this issue in the 
    answer to questions no. 2209 and 
    10119. 

    Secondly: 

    It is 
    mustahabb for the Muslim to put himself before others when saying du’aa’, 
    and there is evidence for that including the following: 

    1 – It was 
    narrated that ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: 
    The Messenger of Allaah  (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) 
    said: “When one of you prays, let him say: al-Tahiyyaatu Lillaahi 
    wa’l-salawaatu wa’l-tayyibaat; al-salaamu ‘alayka ayyuha’l-nabiyyu wa 
    rahmat-Allaahi wa barakaatuhu; al-salaamu ‘alayna wa ‘ala ‘ibaad-illaah 
    il-saaliheen (All compliments, prayers and good words are due to Allaah; 
    peace be upon you, O Prophet, and the mercy of Allaah and His blessings; 
    peace be upon us and upon the righteous slaves of Allaah). For if you say 
    that it will reach every righteous slave in the heavens and on earth. (Then 
    say:) Ash-hadu al-laa ilaaha ill-Allaah wa ash-hadu anna Muhammadan 
    ‘abduhu wa rasooluhu (I bear witness that there is no god except Allaah 
    and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger).” 

    Narrated by 
    al-Bukhaari (797) and Muslim (402). 

    Al-Haafiz Ibn 
    Hajar al-Asqallaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:  

    The words “al-salaamu 
    ‘alayna (peace be upon us)” are taken as evidence that it is mustahabb 
    to start with oneself when saying du’aa’. In al-Tirmidhi there is a saheeh 
    hadeeth from Ubayy ibn Ka’b which says that when the Messenger of Allaah 
     (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) mentioned anyone and prayed 
    for him, he would start with himself. The original version is in Muslim. 
    Another example is the words of Nooh and Ibraaheem (peace be upon them) as 
    it says in al-Tanzeel.  

    Fath 
    al-Baari 
    (2/314) 

    2 – The 
    lengthy hadeeth of Ibn ‘Abbaas about the story of Moosa and al-Khidr (peace 
    be upon them both) – which is the report which al-Haafiz referred to and 
    said that it is in al-Tirmidhi and the original version is in Muslim. In it, 
    it says: 

    “Then they 
    proceeded until they came to some boys who were playing, and al-Khadr went 
    straight to one of them, and killed him. Moosa (peace be upon him) was 
    greatly distressed by that and said: ‘Have you killed an innocent person who 
    had killed none? Verily, you have committed a thing Nukr (a great 
    Munkar — prohibited, evil, dreadful thing)!’” The Messenger of Allaah 
     (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Were it not that he 
    was too hasty he would have seen wondrous things, but he was seized with 
    fear of blame for his companion. Moosa said: ‘If I ask you anything after 
    this, keep me not in your company, you have received an excuse from me.’ If 
    he had been patient he would have seen wondrous things.” He (the narrator) 
    said: When he mentioned any of the Prophets he would start with himself: 
    “May Allaah have mercy upon us and upon my brother.” 

    Al-Nawawi (may 
    Allaah have mercy on him) said: 

    Our companions 
    said: This shows that it is mustahabb for a person to start with himself 
    when saying du’aa’ concerning matters of the Hereafter. As for worldly 
    matters, proper etiquette is to show preference to others and put others 
    before oneself. 

    Sharh 
    Muslim 
    (15/144) 

    Al-Suyooti 
    (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: 

    Hence they 
    recommended that the one who is supplicating should start with du’aa’ for 
    himself before he says du’aa’ for others, because that is more likely to 
    receive a response, as he will be more sincere, more submissive towards 
    Allaah, more eloquent in expressing his need, and less likely to have a 
    feeling of pride and self-admiration. This is the way of the Prophets and 
    Messengers. … and he quoted some of their du’aa’s, which we shall quote 
    below. 

    
    Al-Shamaa’il al-Shareefah 
    (p. 139). 

    3 – It was 
    narrated that Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The 
    Messenger of Allaah  (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) passed 
    by the graves of Madeenah and he turned to face them and said: “Peace be 
    upon you, O inhabitants of the graves. May Allaah forgive us and you. You 
    have gone ahead of us but we will follow you.” 

    Narrated by 
    al-Tirmidhi (1053); he said: (it is) hasan ghareeb. Classed as saheeh by 
    al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi. 

    Imam 
    al-San’aani (may Allaah have mercy on him) said, discussing what is learned 
    from this hadeeth and another, similar report: 

    These two 
    ahaadeeth indicate that when a person says du’aa’ for someone or prays for 
    forgiveness for him, he should start with du’aa’ for himself and asking for 
    forgiveness for himself. This is indicated in many Qur’aanic du’aa’s: 
    “Our Lord! Forgive us and our brethren” [al-Hashr 59:10] and “and ask 
    forgiveness for your sin, and also for (the sin of) believing men and 
    believing women” [Muhammad 47:19] and others. 

    Subul 
    al-Salaam 
    (2/243). 

    4 – This is 
    the way of the Prophets (peace be upon them). For example: 

    (a)
    The 
    Prophet of Allaah Moosa (peace be upon him):

    “Moosa 
    (Moses) said: ‘O my Lord! Forgive me and my brother, and admit us into Your 
    Mercy, for you are the Most Merciful of those who show mercy’”

    [al-A’raaf 
    7:151]

    (b)
    The 
    Prophet of Allaah Nooh (peace be upon him):

    “ ‘My Lord! 
    Forgive me, and my parents, and him who enters my home as a believer, and 
    all the believing men and women. And to the Zaalimoon (polytheists, 
    wrongdoers, and disbelievers) grant You no increase but destruction!’”

    [Nooh 
    71:28]

    (c)
    The 
    Prophets of Allaah Ibraaheem and Ismaa’eel (peace be upon them):

    “Our Lord! 
    And make us submissive unto You and of our offspring a nation submissive 
    unto You, and show us our Manaasik (all the ceremonies of pilgrimage — Hajj 
    and ‘Umrah), and accept our repentance. Truly, You are the One Who accepts 
    repentance, the Most Merciful.

    129. “Our 
    Lord! Send amongst them a Messenger of their own (and indeed Allaah answered 
    their invocation by sending Muhammad صلى الله 
    عليه وسلم), who shall recite unto them Your Verses and instruct them 
    in the Book (this Qur’aan) and Al-H(full knowledge of the Islamic laws and 
    jurisprudence or wisdom or Prophethood), and purify them. Verily, You are 
    the All-Mighty, the All-Wise”

    [al-Baqarah 
    2:128, 129]

    (d)
    The 
    Prophet of Allaah Ibraaheem (peace be upon him):

    (i)
    

    “O my Lord! 
    Make me one who performs As‑Salaah (Iqaamat‑as‑Salaah), and (also) from my 
    offspring, our Lord! And accept my invocation.

    41. “Our 
    Lord! Forgive me and my parents, and (all) the believers on the Day when the 
    reckoning will be established” 

    [Ibraaheem 
    14:40, 41] 

    (ii)

    “And 
    (remember) when Ibraaheem (Abraham) said: ‘O my Lord! Make this city 
    (Makkah) one of peace and security, and keep me and my sons away from 
    worshipping idols’”

    [Ibraaheem 
    14:35]

    5 – It is also 
    the action of the believers: 

    “And those 
    who came after them say: ‘Our Lord! Forgive us and our brethren who have 
    preceded us in Faith, and put not in our hearts any hatred against those who 
    have believed. Our Lord! You are indeed full of kindness, Most Merciful’”

    [al-Hashr 
    59:10]

    And Allaah 
    knows best.