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Until this comment, I had thought we were talking about already married couples who'd already figured those kinds of things out. I'm now realizing I was wrong.
I made this point to my ex roommate, who's already getting into fights with her bf. They've only been together for 3 months, moved in after 2 weeks, and started late night fights by the first month. I get consistent text throughout the week about another fight, another mental breakdown, 4 xanx just to calm down, ect. I'm like, it's been 3 months?? Should still be in the honeymoon phase imo. The other day, she came over just so she could shower in peace. Showed up all red eyes. After about 10 mins of venting, she admitted that she hated him yet said she can't leave? People are confusing. >

That doesn't seem like work. It seems like a waste of time.
Relationships are work, but the point is to work together. It can be usually fun and easy, but occasionally it can require you to do something that wouldn't be your first choice. >

Relationships take effort but they should not be difficult. You shouldn’t be fighting all the time, and you certainly certainly should never compromise on big issues. And they should show you respect. Not the “you must obey me” bs people try to pull but just respect your autonomy and respect you as a person. >

You should never compromise on big issues? That is the most important time to compromise. >

If you want children or not, if you want to get married or not, etc are all things you should not be compromising on rather finding someone who wants the same thing as you. The right partner will want the same things in life on that kind of big scale. I see so many people compromise on kids specifically for their partner and it doesn’t end well in my opinion.