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I have an auto-immune disease which makes anything social with friends (because most social things are to do with food) really annoying. I hate being the burden at a restaurant.
I get it's frustrating for you as a server, but you have two options, tell me you can't serve me and I'll go elsewhere, or help me experience a normal social outing without being judged and condemned for something I was born with.
Heard a story about a woman wanted a dish made a certain way i think for allergen reasons, the chef did his best to accommodate while keeping the dish as true as he could. Her partner ordered same dish without changes.
Meals were served, she promptly starts picking at her partners plate to see how different they were. >

🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ >

I really read this the first couple times as “people with allergies shouldn’t eat people out” 
and I was really confused and dying to see the comments. >

Nut allergy is serious business man >

Allergic to shellfish 🤷🏻‍♀️ >

No bearded clams for you! >

It's not that people with severe allergies shouldn't eat out, but rather, they shouldn't try to order something that has the ingredient they're allergic to and doesn't have an easy or obvious substitution. >

Then they go to bakeries and ask for something gluten free >

Gluten is not the sort of allergy that kills you by traces of the allergen. >

I guess celiac isn't technically an allergy, but traces of gluten will do some pretty serious damage in the long run >

It is an allergy. It is diagnosed by the presence of antibodies to gluten. >

Auto immune disease, but for me it's a lot easier to say that I've got an allergy because it's the only way people take it seriously and stop trying to force me to eat their fucking food that could make me sick for weeks. >

it was hard for me to get with this concept at first but i've learned as i get deeper into life as a sick person that it's totally okay to lie if that's what it takes to get treated with respect >

Most normal people will consider food allergy to mean 'something that makes them sick', so lactose intolerance is lumped in the same as a shellfish allergy.
At the end of the day it's just about what the person is comfortable eating.  No need to be pedantic.  They don't want it. >

mmmmmmmmmmmmmm no. Allergies are potentially life threatening. Lactose Intolerant people will hardly every call themselves "allergic to dairy"....don't use the word allergy if it isn't an allergy....it makes restaurant worker's lives harder. >

There are different levels of being allergic.  I'm allergic to all kinds of things.  Shellfish, many raw fruits, nuts, the list goes on.  Deathly allergic to none.    I'm also allergic, oops sorry, intolerant to lactose.
So you're ok with me bringing up the shellfish allergy, even though it is mild, but I should not bring up lactose intolerance and just shit myself after dessert? >

Having allergies is fine. The problem is with people who have allergies, and don't take any steps to prepare for the world. The guy with the tea allergy(lolwut?) should have alternate choices in mind before reaching the register. If he had the decency to prepare, this wouldn't have been an issue. >

While some allergies might be obvious to find, some allergies aren't as obvious just by looking at the menu and not every restaurant has allergens listed. Soy is such a widely used ingredient in the least obvious places. And sometimes you try to contact the restaurant in advance and they don't respond for several days, if at all. >

If a restaurant can't be bothered to return an email about allergens would you trust them to make your food in an allergen free environment? >

Sometimes, it's not an option. Just last weekend my family went out to eat for my grandma's birthday and I had to ask the waitress right there. The servers and the chefs aren't the ones checking email. It would honestly depend on the restaurant. If it's simply checking the ingredient on the bun, it's fine. Other times, it can get more complicated. If it seems sketchy, I order a salad with no croutons, tomatoes, or cucumber. >

People with severe allergies are fine it’s the fucking bozos that don’t tell you they have a severe allergy, like what the actual fuck is wrong with you if you wait until the last minute to say something. >

There was a reddit post a couple years ago from a dude who made a big dinner for a bunch of family and friends. One of his friends girlfriends was severely allergic to seafood of some sort (I think) and ate it and ended up having a reaction so severe she was in a coma and was facing lifelong effects. Apparently she knew about the allergy but never said anything so as not to be rude or something. I can't remember exactly but yeah ..always wondered how that turned out. If it was indeed true. >

It’s even more rude to not say anything, what the hell lol >

more like "people with severe allergies should KNOW WHICH REPLACEMENTS THEY CAN USE AND HOW TO ORDER THEM" as well as "should do research to make sure their replacements are feasible at this establishment" 
​
When I was a manager at a burger joint before they had Gluten free buns available- we had a regular come in who was a Celiacs (not an allergy but can't eat gluten without wrecking her system) she asked me "can my burger go straight from the grill- to my tray, don't even put it next to the bread. I said sure, we can do that. Once she confirmed we could do that, she came all the time, with HER OWN gluten free buns and packets of sauces. got her burger handled that 1 second special way...and never had any issues or held up any lines. >

Yeah, I could always tell "celiacs" weren't really celiacs when I worked at a restaurant where burgers were one of our main things. We toasted the buns and only a few times in almost decade did I have someone actually take me up on the offer to not toast the gluten free bun for them. Or you'd get people wanting to order something deep fried that we simply couldn't do because we only had two baskets and couldn't cross contaminate the fries with seafood, then suddenly they would be okay. Just say you're gluten free then douche bags instead of co-opting an actual very serious disorder. >

And making me shut down an entire station to sanitize it before I make your food. That’s the biggest thing to me. I’ll make you whatever-free you want- don’t say something that will make me think you’ll DIE if I use a shortcut around the real allergy procedure. >

He was allergic to tea leaves but wanted tea? >

She was allergic to the black tea ingredient and yeah still wanted a tea, we substituted for an iced tea that wasn’t actually tea and is just yummy fruit syrup >

The single ingredient in black tea is tea leaves..? Like, black tea is just oxidized plant. Unless you have a specific tea with added aroma/flavour >

They could have an allergy to a component of tea leaves, such as to tannins >

If someone is allergic to a something found in the single ingredient of what they want to order, maybe they shouldn't order it. >

If it was only found in tea leaves I’d agree, however tannins are pretty widespread throughout many fruits, vegetables, and nuts >

Sorry if I was a bit unclear. What I meant was that seeing as tea is only one ingredient, if you are allergic to a compound found in tea, you should just not order tea >

Oh yep that makes sense, although a lot of the population unfortunately aren’t smart enough to figure that out >

i kinda agree. 
if you have a "serious" allergy or simply dislike an ingredient, then well... order something else or eat somewhere else. 
the dish is the dish. if you are allergic to peanuts then you cannot expect an asian restaurant to substitute peanuts in a dish with oeanut sauce. 
if you are allergic to gluten.. maybe not order pasta / pizza ? 
I think its kinda whack that its gotten "normal" to  expect restaurants to change their dishes and cater to any specific preference or need. >

I have anaphylaxis to dairy and guess where I eat out?
Sushi places/steakhouses where the meat and dairy rarely even go near each other.
Otherwise I eat nothing or just get fries/a salad. Maybe a burger(I take off the bun)
I’d never go to a place like an Italian restaurant and expect no butter/cheese lol >

Try kosher stuff. They never mix meet with dairy. >

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention Kosher places.
Also: Kosher burgers are basically Krabby Patties in taste >

Wouldn't kosher burgers just taste like regular non-cheese burgers? >

Its a higher quality of meat, Kosher means more than just 'did not touch dairy' >

I know about no pork (and other animals) and a certain way of slaughter. How would that affect a beef of chicken patty? >

only the front 4 quarters of a cow are kosher >

If you have an allergy that is life threatening or is going to make you violently ill and you “trust” a minimum wage food employee to prepare your food, you’re the idiot here. Sorry not sorry. >

I don't agree that they shouldn't go out to eat, but they absolutely are responsible for knowing what they're allergic to and what alternatives they can consume. >

As someone who comes with a list of food allergies there's only a handful of places I can eat and I know it. Going to a tea shop knowing you can't have anything though is a grade a douch move though.
Eating out is a nightmare so I've always got snacks and I know the best place to get something I'm in the mood for. Going somewhere new research is always something done but tbh it's easier to just not bother going in. 
Having people make it seem like not a big deal though drives me nuts (which is on my list) as you don't have to deal with the after effects. >

When I worked at a busy pizza shop we had a gluten free crust available… we’d always use a different pizza cutter but still the pizza was going in the same oven as the gluten pizzas, there is flour in the air, every time you grab veggies or cheese it has most definitely been contaminated with some flour ever slightly. One time this lady came in and she was screaming at the owner of how her husband with SEVERE celiacs became very very sick eating the gluten free pizza from our shop. I wanted to ask her how her husband survived this long. >

Cause duck doughnuts, bacon doughnuts are worth it. I think the guy ordering tea is more like a person who should know what they want before getting into a line. >

Which one do you prefer,the maple bacon or bacon in the sun? >

Bacon in the sun >

There are options for people with allergies and they pretty much go out trying to find them. Also, they may take the risk if that means they can have a relatively normal social life. >

Ostracized for having an allergy, no. Holding up a line due to the fact - yes that person should just make like a tree and leaf. I have kids, they are picky sometimes. We have gotten to the front of a line and they had not made up their minds. We step aside, let people continue on their day until we are 100% ready. It’s not an allergy issue, it’s an entitlement issue with the person in question. >

On the flip side: People should be able to go to a restaurant and ask about their menu and ingredients to find something that they can eat if they have food sensitivities, allergies, or are on a restricted diet.  My daughter has Galactosemia and can't eat anything with dairy. We know what she can and cannot have at a lot of chain restaurants and our local places.  Sometime we venture out to a new place and we have to ask questions.  It is really disheartening when we are met with sighs and annoyed looks.  "Listen dude.  She has to deal with this everyday of her life.  Is it that hard to check if the hamburger bun has milk?" >

I basically agree. Like, there are places that would be generally safe for certain allergies, but don't go to fucking Panera Bread if you have a severe gluten allergy. >

i agree its annoying to have to accommodate people sometimes in hospitality, but you will probably forget about the inconvenience of helping them after like a day, human kindness and helping another should always come in front of "but i dont want to".
you shouldnt eat in places that are full of ur allergy, but if ur in that situation regardless, last thing you want is probably also the server being in a pissy with you for an allergy you cannot help. >

I have a friend whose mother is allergic to... just so many different foods. But the rest of her family has no food sensitivities. She has a nice little laminated card, which she carries at all times, that lists all of her allergens, and she has never once so much as raised a complaint to her table about the length of time she has to wait for her food. And she waits, because there's a ton of prep required to make her food. 
She recognizes that there's a risk of cross contamination, but the alternative is that the family never eats out or the rest of the family eats out and excludes her, and neither is an option they should have to choose when they're perfectly capable of accommodating her at a myriad of restaurants. Isn't that the point of accommodating people? Your opinion is that people should suffer without accommodation for things completely out of their control?  That's not just unpopular. That's gross. >

As someone with several food allergies, people with this kind of attitude make us not want to eat certain places. I'm allergic to mustard, if I ask of there's mustard on a sandwich and you roll your eyes at me I'm liable to get pissy. I always double check because I've been too many places where it's not kisted on the description and I have to send my food back because I can't eat it. >

I've noticed reddit has a weird hatred of people with allergies. Heaven forbid anyone be inconvienced to accomodate a person's safety. Obviously the example in the post is beyond the norm of allergen inconvience and simply has to do with the person not being prepared to order an alternative and not being willing to let others order first. >

Yeah, its like how dare you clarify this thing that could kill you or make you very sick isn't in your food! I always try to order last at a new place because I know my order can take a little longer because of questions like is there mustard, us there sesame oil, is there strawberry/peaches/pineapple in the mixed fruit. >

People are mind boggling. 
Fruit is such a tough one too, most people don't think of it or don't believe it. >

My ex mother in law told me there was no way I was allergic to strawberries. Snuck strawberry juice into a smoothie I was drinking and then got offended when the ER doctor called her a hazard to humanity >

My mother has a less malicious but similar story about her MIL. People are crazy >

Oh that whole family was a pack of assholes. They like to bully and guilt trip people into doing what they want, but then whine when nobody wants anything to do with them. >

i kind of agree - the thing is - if you have a severe allergy - you really need to understand....there is very little most restaurant employees can do to avoid cross contamination. with the speed people want their meals prepared, it's just gonna happen. it's not that you should just stop eating out, but be aware that some of your requests just might not be possible and you shouldn't take your frustrations out on restaurant staff. there's nothing they can do.