comment: >
  
  Unless the woman is choosing to dress that way.
  Edit: so some of my neighbors are Muslim. Daughters dress in secular American fashion; shorts in warmer weather, no head covering, exposed shoulders at times. The mother still chooses to wear head covering about half the time and the rest of the time not. It's obviously her choice because 1) she's my friend and we've talked enough I know she's making the choice for herself and 2) it would make no sense if her husband was being a domineering asshat towards her only half the time and none at all to their teenage daughters. All those people commenting that no Muslim women could possibly choose to cover her head of her own volition are bigoted af.
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  I'm going to address the specific point  "it's not about Islam"
  It's absolutely about Islam.  The culture, values, and ideals in Islam support that pattern of behavior, and we can have a separate, more nuanced discussion about that if you want, but to take Islam out of the equation entirely is wrong in most cases.
  Remove the specifics from your statement and it reads "if your partner is upholding a belief, and you are upholding that belief in a differing way or to a differing level, then it isn't about the belief"
  My wife definitely only goes to church because she's Christian.  I don't, but I haven't abandoned my faith either.  Is it fair to say that my wife going to church not about Christianity?  What if she dresses modestly for the same reason?  What if she dresses very modestly? 
  Again, I'm not arguing the morality or consistency of Islam or any of the culture/behaviors surrounding it, only that Islam is a meaningful factor in the lives and behavior of women who routinely wear clothes associated with Islam. >
  
  People have a hard time understanding that each religion has these subtle things that vary from region to region and person to person. Mormon women for example are called sluts if they show their shoulders >
  
  Not even just religions.  Dress like a biker or a goth for an interview or court hearing and see how people react.  We trip out about hijabs, but in the US, the wrong outfit in a courtroom can have an impact on if and how a person is sentenced.