comment: >
  
  Defenestration is the preferred method of Russian “retirement”
context: Wikipedia has a big list of a lot of deaths that are totally unconnected and completely accidental >
  
  And that page is only the 2022 list. >
  
  D.C. one is kinda strange cause cops have found "no leads" seems like their syndicate is deeper than we thought >
  
  People watch too much tv. It's very easy to cover your tracks in real life. A murder from my grandmother's block in Philly went unsolved for 15 years because the guy wore a bald cap. He was on recording breaking in, touching everything, and leaving with blood on him. Only reason he was caught was he pawned a piece of jewelry years later that was a limited run tiffany that was in the report. Cops even arrested this guy in connection to it a few days after it happenedbut let him go in under 30 minutes without printing him because he wasn't bald. >
  
  This exactly. There are so many unsolved murders. We're not actually that good at catching them >
  
  Ya I found it strange that nationally where I am in Canada only like 70% of homicides are solved annually >
  
  That’s actually really good number. Most developed countries are below 50%. >
  
  And that's including the almost 1/3 of U.S. homicides for which the perpetrator just waits on the scene for police to come arrest them, or even calls 911 to report it.
  So, in some departments, they're barely clearing 25% of homicides in which a suspect doesn't immediately turn themself in! 
  Source: About one-third was the proportion when I was a criminology professor, up to about 10 years ago, but varies locally. (Happens often when romantic partners, family members or friends kill each other, not exactly meaning to, feel bad & know they're gonna get caught, so they just call it in.)
  There was a real-life incident dramatized in The Wire illustrating this: "Cutty" borrowing from the real Donnie Andrews: "I just shot a n---a. Come get him" (link to Reddit post/comment). >
  
  
  And that's including the almost 1/3 of U.S. homicides for which the perpetrator just waits on the scene for police to come arrest them, or even calls 911 to report it.
  
  So, in some departments, they're barely clearing 25% of homicides in which a suspect doesn't immediately turn themself in!
  That's crazy, so they just wanna end their life and the life of the person that slighted them? >
  
  
  so they just wanna end their life and the life of the person that slighted them?
  
  Kinda, maybe sometimes, but I'd say not exactly: 
  Most of those ones are spontaneous rage killings where death is likely but not necessarily intended. Someone feels slighted and humiliated, gets enraged, and attacks the person they felt humiliated them.
  Beating, shooting, stabbing, choking.... They're usually not exactly thinking "I want you dead," but more like "you're gonna pay for that!" and "I'll show you!" 
  More often than not no one dies. But when you get mad & beat people often enough (this is never the first time!), or lose your temper with a gun in your possession, sooner or later someone dies.
  Then they calm down. Wife is dead in the kitchen (actually quite a common location). Best friend is dead outside your favorite bar. 
  Shit. Now...what else are you gonna do? 9-1-1. "Hi. I just killed XYZ. Please come get us." >
  
  “Alexei Idamkin, Russia’s consul general in Calcutta, told the Tass news agency that there was no foul play in the lawmaker’s death.”
  Totes sounds legit. >
  
  He didn’t say it, he declared it! >
  
  The steaks in this issue are high. Imagine going against Putin. >
  
  Disagree and you'll get the chop >
  
  Neither side where mincing their words. >
  
  It's a shame though, he was a cut above the rest. >
  
  It wasn't the fall that killed him, but the impact on the marbling. >
  
  He was a member of the Russia’s ruling party and had a huge business in Russia. This together already means he was highly corrupt.
  For years he profited working with the regime and never was against it. But, apparently, war is bad for business, so he posted a single story in a messenger and then promptly apologised for it saying someone else used his account. Also, luxury hotel abroad when most Russian people can’t even leave the country.
  Take it as you like. >
  
  Is this where I say "ESH?"
  Hard to feel bad about Russian oligarchs going splat.  They all know what they signed into.  There's no becoming a made man in that particular crime family.
  Which doesn't mean we shouldn't be horrified at the lack of protections for speech over there.  At the fact that being critical of the government can and often is a death sentence. >
  
  Just like the contractors who died on the Death Star. They knew the risk going in. >
  
  They knew there were no guardrails. >
  
  In Russia, the ground is meat magnet >
  
  Meat magnate meets meat magnet. >
  
  Sausage dude dies in sussage accident >
  
  Meatmaker meets maker >
  
  Foul fall for fowl fellow >
  
  Mafia state. 
  What a fucking garbage heap of cheap goons playing pretend government. Russia is a country without anyone at the wheel. >
  
  I swear you're right about it. It feels so weird when your whole government is a bunch of gangsters masquerading as legitimate heads of state. And people RESPECT them for it. Like I don't even know if it's called Stockholm syndrome or what. >
  
  The book "Red Notice" by Bill Browder is an enlightening look into how the mafia state came to be and functions semi-within the laws of Russia. >
  
  When my mum visited Russia she said people were INCREDULOUS the president had a salary.  They literally couldn't comprehend the presidents wallet and the government's bank balance being different things. >
  
  That's an interesting insight. Being from the US I have a hard time grasping the Russian culture, especially their view on government. >
  
  "Such a nasty accident".
  "We don't call them accidents we call them incidents."
  "Why?"
  "Because accident implies there's no one to blame". >
  
  It's for the greater good. >
  
  The greater good, yarp >
  
  …Narp? >
  
  Good. Meet us at the castle. >
  
  Hag >
  
  I beg your pardon? >
  
  "Evil old woman, considered frightful or ugly. Twelve down." >
  
  Why kill the children?! At least three of them say that the wives and children were also found dead. One of them say with blunt axe marks on them. The fuck. >
  
  Because some people will stand up if it means protecting their families. It sends a message to the rest that the FSB won't stop with you if you don't stay in line. North Korea and Latin Cartels also do it to cause terror in people who defect.
  Also if you die without heirs the Government will take your assets. >
  
  Can confirm, live in Latin America. Lineage wipe is a very real thing in cartels. >
  
  One of these days someone will actually die from falling in Russia but no one will believe it and instead waste time trying to figure why Putin would have wanted them dead. >
  
  What if this is how Putin goes out and then everyone starts freaking out because they think someone killed a world leader and nobody knows who or how, sounds like a good 2023 storyline >
  
  Why are so many of these Putin critics so clumsy >
  
  Dude was thinking bout all that meat >
  
  Hacking, whacking, chopping that meat >
  
  Dude seriously? That's seven hours I'm going to have to mod that game just to reinstall it, play it for 2 hours, and then forget about it for a year or so. >
  
  I mean at a certain point just find a different way to kill your political opponents, right?
  Edit: Y'all it was a dark sarcastic comment. Stop commenting about how it's about sending a message, that's obvious. And no, lack of creativity is not my main criticism, jeez. >
  
  I think it’s purposeful.  They are letting everybody know what happens if you go against daddy.  
  If they said he died of cancer, it wouldn’t send a message.  
  They don’t want to come right out and say they executed him because of optics/plausible deniability.     They’re saying it without saying it.  Just like mobsters >
  
  To be fair, dying of a particular kind of cancer that only happens when you have extreme exposure to radiation and is the leading cause of death among Russian spies that turned is another way to send a message, but it takes a year or two to actually die and windows are faster. >
  
  I believe the point is that they don't need to go that far.  
  Defenestrating someone is easy and cheap, and they are not concerned about doing it over and over. >
  
  I just connected the word defenestration to fenêtre, the french word for window, and I'm having a moment.... >
  
  Actually the etymology is from Latin (from de- ‘down from’ + Latin fenestra ‘window’). French fenêtre just also comes from the same Latin root word. >
  
  What the fuck knowledge did I just learn? Etymology is dope. >
  
  And the de- stands for an outward direction.
  If you study just a little bit of Latin, many English words suddenly make a LOT of sense. Such as: international, imperfection, repossession, antidote, concurrency, proclamation… >
  
  So then what if you push someone into a building from a window and the fall kills them? >
  
  Infenestration (in = into, onto). But if you throw them at the window instead of through it, you’re talking about adfenestration. >
  
  You're Pavel Antov, the sausage king of Odhisha? 
  I'm suggesting that you leave before I have to get snooty. >
  
  Snooty? >
  
  Snotty! >
  
  Snotty? >
  
  No one commits suicide jumping off a 3rd floor balcony.  If you’re going to jump, you’re making damn sure you don’t survive in a horribly broken and traumatized condition.
  This was straight up murder by state-sponsored mafia.  Just like all the other prominent and wealthy Russians who’ve fallen off or out of stuff lately. >
  
  State-sponsored? Dude, government in russia IS the mafia. >
  
  Whoa hey.  Be careful there by the balcony. Youse never knows if an “accident” might happen. >
  
  At some point, Russia's tendency to assassinate people in other countries is gonna come back and bite them in the ass.
  People are going to start assuming that it is perfectly okay to assassinate Russian leaders within Russia, at some point. >
  
  Putin is quite paranoid.
  Remember him sitting way on the other side of that way, way, way too long table while meeting the French president. That's also how he meets with his own generals. 
  The AH knows how to kill others and tries to avoid it being done to him. >
  
  Well it isn't paranoia if a lot of people actually do want to kill you. >
  
  While it would be a power move, the president of France isn't going to do that with his bare hands. >
  
  Hmm, what’s the autopsy on the friend say? Will they even do an autopsy? >
  
  "Putin had a beef with the meat man." >
  
  Putin’s guy took a fall for him. >
  
  Man, if I ever vacation in Russia I’m staying on the first floor of my hotel. They’ve got some serious problems with their windows and balconies.
  EDIT: Jesus Christ guys I realize it happened in India. Just enjoy the joke you nerds >
  
  Sir, you've been upgraded to the presidential suite. Enjoy the view from the balcony >
  
  Oh no that’s alright. I enjoy being the first one in line for the continental breakfast >
  
  Please enjoy our Novichok special omelettes, dear guest! >
  
  I hear the breakfast tea is to die for >
  
  polonium really gets you radiating that positive energy >
  
  Alpha particles, yummy >
  
  I prefer gamma radiation with my breakfast. >
  
  Look at this guy hulking out. >
  
  A Russian hiding in some remote place in India is bound to get noticed eventually. Surely there are better places. >
  
  Well it's probably easier said than done since Russia has banned travel to most of the world. And a lot of Russian oligarchs/politicians themselves have been banned and sanctioned. 
  Plus unless you're using alternate bank accounts, cards, phones, ID, etc... You'd probably be found pretty quickly if they're already looking for you.
  I suppose the reason for India
  could be the high population density making it easier to hide in plain sight, and this place is 200km from the nearest airport so there's at least a lot of other places he could have gone. 
  Like you said though, being the only two Russians in a part of India that gets almost 0 tourists whatsoever would really make you stick out, especially staying at a 3 star hotel. Although hotel star ratings aren't a real system, not sure how swanky that actually is. >
  
  it's a pretty meh hotel. two white foreigners speaking in an accent would stick out like a thumb and word would spread among locals so yeah >
  
  It's possible someone in local law enforcement realized who he was and called the Russian consulate looking for a bounty.
  It's also possible that his traveling companion died of alcohol poisoning or an accident and someone called the consulate to report the death of a foreign national. That would have tipped off the SVR who would have sent assassins.
  To give him some credit, he created the social media post that got him into trouble back in July.  He did manage to avoid being found for five months.
  It looks like India's security services are not responding to the incident. On one hand, if it looks like an accident, they don't have to confront Russia. On the other hand, no sovereign nation likes other countries' spy services killing people on their soil - ally or not. >
  
  Calm down you lot. He wasn't assassinated. He committed suicide after the death of his friend who also criticised Putin. 
  It's clear that you shouldn't criticise Putin or you will very quickly become depressed enough to suicide. The statistics are alarmingly clear. >
  
  I'll be sure not to criticize Vladimir Putin president of the Russian Federation, my mental health is one of my priorities. Thank you for telling me. >
  
  Fucks sake just shoot the oligarchs in the face, it'd be more subtle at this point. >
  
  Not being subtle IS the point... >
  
  I'm reminded of Robespierre who just kept executing more and more people until finally the ones left decided they had better odds of living if they executed him instead. >
  
  I dont understand this meme. At least in soviet times the state would be blatant.  "You are opposed politically to us, u go to gulag.". There was no implied threat. The state was honest. 
  This is pure mafia state behavior.   I cant believe people used to say putin is a master strategist. He is just a dumb thug. Drug cartel tier.  Derranged psychopath.
  Defenestration seems to be one of the cruelest forms of executions. You wont die immediately when you hit the ground. >
  
  
  He is just a dumb thug. Drug cartel tier. Derranged psychopath
  
  He's always have been. He just managed to hold on to the mask long enough to gain the power. He's started his "career" in St.Petersburg in the 90s when he organized a small gang to commit a fraud in a cargo port. He's literally robbed the city and was under investigation, charges were dropped when the mayor intervened. >
  
  Imagine growing up as a child in Russia, looking up to the great hitmen of the cold war. You beg your parents for a fake passport and polonium set for Christmas. You grow up and manage to put yourself through hitman school and get top marks. You manage to secure a job with the gru, excited to perform your first hit, and you're told that you need to make it look like an accidental fall from a balcony. Cool. "I can do this, I've trained my whole life for this" you think to yourself. You prepare for every eventuality. You meticulously clean the crime scene. At the end of the day, you do your work and are excited for your next assignment, wondering what sort of challenge the future holds. 
  Boss comes into the office the following day and doesn't even acknowledge the fantastic job you did the night before. Doesn't comment on the months of fake emails you sent, slowly building up suicidal thoughts. Doesn't note the beautiful work in getting the subject to cry  beforehand so you can mark the note, forcibly written in the victims own handwriting, with their own salty tears. Instead, he jumps straight to the next assignment. 
  "That's ok," you think to yourself, "I have important work to be about. Need to be concentrating on the task at hand, not wishing for adulation." You straighten your adidas track suit and get your head back in the game.
  "Balcony. Fall. Two nights from now." Boss man hands you an envelope with the details.
  "Ok," you think, "you did a good job and they want the same high quality work for a similar assignment. This must be a compliment." So you do your work. And, again, they give you a fall. And again. And again.
  You've been fucking typecast.
  You spent your childhood dreaming of this? Spent six figures training and learning for this? Bullshit. 
  Pure bullshit.
  Fuck this noise, you're just a pusher now. "If that's what you're going to treat me as, then that's what I'll be." 
  You have no room for emotion you have no more room for creativity. You've left humanity behind, and now you're the fucking pusher robot. Pak. Chooie. Unf. >
  
  Sir, this is a wendy's >
  
  Yeah, but why does it have a balcony? >
  
  Everything is a balcony if you believe in yourself :) >
  
  The odds of falling out of hotels in Russia when you are a high-up official are pretty astounding. >
  
  
  A Russian sausage magnate who briefly criticised Russia’s invasion of
  Ukraine has died after falling from the third-floor window of a luxury 
  hotel in India.
  
  The great Russian defenestration pandemic sadly doesn't respect borders. >
  
  Gosh dang, that cursed third floor. The gravity must be higher than usual there. I mean tripping and falling so hard that one goes through a window, physicists should try and make sense of that. >
  
  The Penthouse is complimentary for all of Putin’s friends. Enjoy your stay. >
  
  How about someone put Putin out of his misery with the same treatment. The world and Russia will be such a better place >
  
  Do you have any suggestions? >
  
  Give him pink eye and hope it gets infected >
  
  When he is eating his byacon at Dyenny's I shall pretend to drop my wallet and fart in his eyes when I bend over to pick it up.
  That being said, I can fit about 10 cubic inches of various items in my jail purse. If any of you have ideas of weapons we can place in there, let me know. I'll be doing my kegels in the meantime. >
  
  Abe Frohman is deciding to move to a one-story ranch at this point >
  
  The sausage king of Chicago? >
  
  Putin is straight gangsta and he's not even hiding it... I kind of understand now why he has so many supporters. Russians secretly love and respect gangsters. For whatever fucking reason >
  
  Because thiefs and thugs are the most successful (rich) people in russia. Thats why they think its something Admirable. >
  
  He knew too much about how the sausage was made. >
  
  
  On December 22 morning, one of them (B Vladimir) died. After post-mortem, it was found that he suffered a heart stroke, died, and was cremated. His friend, (Pavel Antonov) was depressed after his death and he too died on December 25"
  
  convenient >
  
  You’re tuned to WKGB, where the hits keep coming. >
  
  Why even hide it anymore? It isn't as though everyone doesn't know what really happened. >
  
  Technically they've never wanted to hide it. They WANT everyone to know how they'll die if they go against Putin >
  
  Courtesy of the ministry of defenestration… >
  
  It was really nice of him to close the window behind him though! >
  
  Putty’s going to run out of oligarchs at this rate. Then again, offing- er, I mean “finding them unsuspiciously dead”- might be his new plan to fund that expense, lost war of his.
  Who knows with people like Putty. >
  
  He plays this shit like i do Crusader Kings.
  Problem is your empire goes to shit once you kill off every competent leader under you and are left with imbeciles who hate you. I wonder when he will realise that. >
  
  "Fell" >
  
  Say what you will about Putin's Russia, but their assassins are seriously hard-working >
  
  I’ve got a balcony I’d like to sell to Putin and shove him off of it. DEATH TO PUTIN!!!!! >
  
  Staying at a luxury hotel in India on a trip to celebrate an upcoming birthday, very common circumstances to be committing suicide by throwing yourself out of a third story window, nothing suspicious here. 
  👍👍👍 >
  
  Lol even their consul doesn't want to investigate the death of a Russian citizen in India and says there is no foul play.
  They're not even hiding that they're a mafia state anymore. >
  
  Russian causes of death:
  1. Ukraine war
  2.Gravity >
  
  Poor bastard was so committed to his own suicide he shot himself 4 times in the back on the way down. >
  
  At this point, I assume they’re doing it to giggle at the internet comments about it. ‘Take a vodka shot every defenestration joke.’ ‘Shit man, I want to live.’ >
  
  suspicious way to meat your demise >
  
  Out a window, you say?