comment: >
  
  Dang, this is a high school level post.
context: I think the main thing holding me back, and perhaps other women, from explaining the source of menstrual-based pain and irritability is not being believed by others. I think a lot of people simply see it as blood coming from the vagina and that's it, but it's an entire hormonal process that can be very extreme. My depression during my period takes me to very dark places. I've known women who have fainted from the pain. It's very real, but a lot of times growing up I've gotten the sense from friends and teachers that having a period isn't a "real" enough excuse to be miserable, so I figured, what's the point of even bringing it up. At least now I've got a caring bf who's understanding, but I still keep a lot of it to myself because I don't want to seem complaining. I guess it's all in upbringing! >
  
  That's really sad, and makes a lot of sense. Really is nothing worse than when you're going through something and people don't believe you. As a person with depression myself, it wasn't until I was properly diagnosed by a medical doctor and physiatrist that people actually took me seriously, and even still I'll get an eye roll or disagreement from people, as if I'm claming the moon is made of cheese.
  I think a big problem is lack of education. I went to a boys secondary school (high school) and my sister went to a girls school, the sex education we had was very different. We barely learnt anything about the female side of puberty and sexual health. >
  
  I'm sorry that you get the eye rolls too! When people don't take you at your own word it's frustrating. Yeah, I think better education is a good start. I went to Catholic school, and the sex ed was seriously bad (we were taught that every single STD is incurable. Like, come on). >
  
  I know that well lol, I went to a strict roman Catholic school from ages 3-7, boys weren't allowed to use urinals, they had them, we just weren't allowed to use them. A teacher would literally stand at them to make sure, I can't use urinals in public bathrooms as a result, religious schools are not very good at education, but are great at making things up as they ramble on lol.
  We were young, so there wasn't much sex ed, but I do remember having our head teacher (principal) give us boys a lecture about not playing with our dangley bits, the irony of a nun who isn't allowed to have sex give 7 year old boys a lesson on male sexual health is both funny and sad. >
  
  I speak openly about mine but I really don't give a fuck about what people think on that matter. I have PCOS and the amount of suffering that goes with it is worse than anyone's obtuse opinion. 
  If women felt like they were in a safe space to talk about it, I'm sure they would. Unfortunately, there are still so many men who are completely immature and/or grossed out by it. In turn, it makes some women feel like they should keep quiet, or that it's a dirty thing.
  So, yes, women should feel free enough to speak about it and there are lots of us out their fighting to make it happen but it's really not women the problem lies with. >
  
  I totally agree, people, specifically men in general need to just grow up a bit. It's not gross, it's just a part of life.
  Also I had to Google what PCOS was, I knew the symptoms, but didn't know it had a name. So case in point, just from you making the comment, I learnt something. >
  
  This is generational
  My generation Gen Z is pretty open about it. In high school students pretty commonly talked about being on their period or their flow around or directly too guys and some dudes carried pads for their female friends.
  I feel like that hasn't really changed much in university apart from women being less likely to say their periods preventing them from working.
  I'm speaking from a male view though and talking about the behaviour I noticed. My female friends still very openly talk about their period, flow, complications all that. >
  
  I see periods the same way I see other bathroom topics…
  Nothing to be ashamed of, but it’s private so you should keep it to yourself. Most of the time people don’t need to hear about it. >
  
  Yeah of course, that's what I'm sayin. Like if you have diarrhoea, it makes sense to mention it to your significant other so they can be mindful/helpful to your situation, but I'm not saying bring them a stool sample. >
  
  As a woman, I agree with you. We as women are blocking ourselves from medical advancement among other things by making this subject a taboo. >
  
  Exactly, a key to advancement is understanding. If we don't understand what an issue is, we can't come up with solutions or things to make it easier. >
  
  Yeah. It's sad if this truly is an unpopular opinion. >
  
  Tbh I hope its not an unpopular opinion, I'm just talking from my personal experience. Maybe it's a cultural thing. >
  
  I felt very embarrassed at first to tell my boyfriend about my period but he was very chill about it and actually asked me to teach him more :) >
  
  I think your opinion is not necessarily unpopular and has actually become a lot more common throughout recent years.
  While I think for the most part it's a good thing, some topics related to this have frustrated me a bit.
  Some people have absolutely horrendous periods.  This is true.  But a lot of us out there just bleed for a week with relatively unobtrusive cramps and not much else.  Yet we are still all treated as martyrs for something that really isn't a big deal.
  No, I don't feel like my uterus is exploding each month when it happens.  No, I don't get debilitating headaches around the time of my period.  No, I don't feel any more emotional around my period than I would otherwise.  To many of us, it's simply a minor inconvenience that happens each month involving an extra cost in toiletries and worrying about staining clothes and sheets.  Yet the media want to make it sound like it's hell on earth for every single woman and we need special treatment and understanding for it.  I don't want to be treated like a martyr...especially for things that aren't even remotely true.  Furthermore, I don't want my emotions to be dismissed as "well it's around the time of your period so they must not actually be valid and we need to treat her with kid gloves".
  Yes, some women experience terrible periods and I really do feel for them.  But I hate the fact that people just assume that we all do now when that isn't at all the case.  I don't want people to feel bad for me for something that doesn't even happen.  I don't want to be treated differently just because I'm on my period. >
  
  
  Furthermore, I don't want my emotions to be dismissed as "well it's around the time of your period so they must not actually be valid and we need to treat her with kid gloves".
  
  Exactly the problem I think is holding us (as a people, I'm not female) back a lot. I always try to put things on a spectrum, and when I feel something is an overreaction, I scale the severity of my partners reaction back a bit in my head before reacting. We also communicate about it if I feel that way. >
  
  I always share details about my period as education to the men in my life. They need to know. It also helps normalize and create cultural shifts around it. >
  
  I have endometriosis which more people need to be more aware of. That being said I’m not in favor of people hearing all the gross details like how heavy my flow was. Still, it definitely should be up to the individual woman sharing and people shouldn’t be as squeamish about it as they are. >
  
  I’m very open about mine and worry I make people uncomfortable. My boyfriend seems to like it. >
  
  Well they say confidence and being comfortable with yourself is attractive, maybe that's what your boyfriend likes. >
  
  He does for sure. The funny thing is I’m also riddled with insecurity. He’s a good guy. >
  
  🎶 Let it flow, let it flow, can’t hold it back anymore, let if flow!🎶 >
  
  I didn’t even know what the normal side affects of a having a period were. When I started bc my entire life changed. Literally. I knew that mood swings and cramps were normal but they never tell you to what extent it isnt normal. There needs to be like genuine sex Ed in schools because nobody should have to go through what I did for as long as I did. >
  
  I had horrible periods as well, almost fainted in the shower, I threw up on the way to school, and I had to change those thick night pads every hours. If I knew I didn´t need to deal with that I would have gone to the doctor within the first year of it happening. I only talked to a doctor about it because I felt empty of energy... I was low on iron. My doctor took action once she heard it affected my schooling (at least its what my mother said since she was there too to read my doctor´s face). 
  I should have gotten birth control even if my schooling wasn´t affected, my whole fucking life during my period was on eggshells! The fact that even doctors might not even take action unless the patient says "oh yeah and I can barely get anything done" despite them clearly having a downgrade in life... Not just Sex ED needs to be improved, the view on periods altogether. >
  
  I was in massage therapy school the last year in a class of all women, with me as the only man. 
  I'm also gay and women have almost always felt comfortable talking about periods with me. I can often tell when women are on their period as well. 
  In class, my classmates were talking about theirs and my male teacher got very anxious about it and told them to stop, but I piped up to say that they have us outnumbered 5 to 2, and that it's just a natural bodily process. They should be able to talk about it as the feel free. >
  
  I do agree with you. However as a woman I don’t really understand why people don’t use contraceptive pills more. They can stop you from having your period and are pretty easy to take. As long as you aren’t wanting to get pregnant at that moment, I see no problems with this. >
  
  The pill is fine for a lot of people, but it can have some serieus side effects. Both physical but also mental, which some women don't even notice because they have been on the pill for so long and consider these side effects as part of their personality. >
  
  I guess you are right.. I suppose everyone has their personal opinions on what is more important.. thx for telling me tho >
  
  I’ve always found women to be very open about their periods.
  I had a very matriarchal upbringing and professional life though.
  The only boy raised by a single mum and 3 sisters. Lots of my friends were girls, most of my bosses when I was younger were women, as I got older I employed a lot of people and it was mostly split 50/50 gender wise and I’ve found most women are 100% open about their periods and what it’s doing to them at the time if it’s affecting their mood or giving them pain or even just casual discussions.
  My old boss was a very dead pan feminist and used to “test” men by talking about vaginas and periods to see if men would squirm and she never got a single reaction from me. I got her to react by openly talking about my penis and asshole once though, played her at her own game. >
  
  Testing employees by talking about genitalia at work.. sounds unprofessional as fuck to me. >
  
  Oh that reminds me. I should tell people about my hemorrhoids and diarrhea more frequently. They need to know about that.