comment: >
  
  You've been manipulated and hurt or simply caught with your pants down being terribly unaware of how a polite person close to you was unhappy but unable to communicate for some reason.
  I beg you to look a little closer: some very nice people give as a lifestyle choice with intent.
  OP - I know a guy. Successful golden boy of his little town - this is how he does it:
  *his Dad's personal reward system is to make sure the other guy gets the better deal. Generosity in business is integral to family culture.
  *He was an insanely popular athlete but never picked on the scrawny kids in school.
  *In his sales business they consider themselves "matchmakers" to find the best fit for the customer (repeat customers drive across the county).
  *will make his major purchases locally even at a higher cost to "give back" or something similar. 
  *He works two jobs: a growing business in the little town and his dad's heritage farm. Anything earned on the farm is turned right back into it, and he organized a co-op to help all the other little farms survive. He shares the expensive equipment he's been able to buy within the co-op and they all work around the clock to make sure everyone is taken care of - so he gives time as well as his talents as well as sharing his stuff. 
  *the guy also does his "homework", he doesn't expect anyone to carry or cater to him. Not even his wife. 
  Conclusion TLDR: He's untouchable. You'd have to go through an entire town to get to him. That's what he gains: the pleasure of strong community ties and a clear conscience.  
  "Too nice" can be a reflection of someone broken who can't speak up for themselves -or- of someone maliciously manipulating -or- of an observer who is jealous and projecting hatred in place of admitting and dealing with their own insecurities.
context: What is not 'toxic' on Reddit? That's my question. >
  
  I’m more than leaning towards deleting Reddit along with all my social media. I know it has its benefits and all but social media has bought out the absolute worst in humans- myself included. >
  
  I'm not a fan of the toxic descriptor here.  People who are 'too nice,'  or as a psychologist would say 'too agreeable,' mostly hurts themselves.  Deferring too much to others is definitely an impediment to these in peolpes' relationships, growth, and fulfillment of goals. >
  
  I believe it's harmful to all parties involved. I think it's a mindset that should be actively discouraged and not just when someone who is looking to exploit this trait comes into frame >
  
  ITT: Someone trying to justify being an asshole and making nice people get all the blame because some "nice guy" probably cheated on them or went nuts. >
  
  Sure if you wanna see it that way. I don't have anything against people who are nice, in fact I think we need more people who are genuinely kind in the world. I just can't find it in me to respect people who claim to be "too nice" when in reality they're just doormats >
  
  I fully agree with this, because I know what you mean by "too nice". You mean people who *claim* to be too nice but are actually scared of confrontation, and slowly building resentment of everyone around them. The kind of people who would rather be friendly with someone they *know* is a bad person because they care more about that bad person's opinion of them than respecting their and the people around them's well being
  Although, these kind of people are usually "too nice" because of some kind of trauma, as are most toxic people, so the best way to deal with it is to express yourself gently and directly, giving them a chance to change, and leaving if they don't (or if you're already mentally exhausted and can't handle this toxicity to begin with, because it's not your responsibility to)
  I'm saying this this directly because I see a lot of people in the replies reply as if you're talking about people who are actually too nice haha :) >
  
  being "nice" is an action. you do nice things. being nice isn't a label.
  if you do not-nice things, then you are not being nice. >
  
  Being nice or not nice is a label given to you depending on your actions, if you get labelled as someone who is too nice, it means you’re going over the top with the nice actions, which in some cases could just be because you’re friendly and helpful, but in others means you’re exactly what OP is describing