comment: >
  
  Speak for y’all self. We don’t do animals on furniture around here.
context: This is a friendly reminder to read our rules.
  Remember, /r/Showerthoughts is for showerthoughts, not "thoughts had in the shower!"
  (For an explanation of what a "showerthought" is, please read this page.)
  Rule-breaking posts may result in bans. >
  
  What do you mean they don't wipe? Mine regularly wipes by scooting around all over my carpet! >
  
  Get your dog tested for worms! That's one of the first symptoms. >
  
  Could also need it’s glands expressed. >
  
  It’s not could. It’s DEFINITELY. Most dogs need their anal glands expressed once a month if not every 6 weeks. . >
  
  We had a dog that required this every other week or so, even after trying all types of diets. After a few months of this, I had the vet teach me.
  "Okay, step one is you're going to want to keep your mouth closed for this..." >
  
  And this comment is the sole reason I’m never getting a dog >
  
  Yeah, TIL. Holy Christ. >
  
  My dog's booty hole prolapses before he poops. When he is done, his rectum gets tucked back in leaving the outside nice and clean. >
  
  I wish mine could do that >
  
  Yours can, but with the exception of some countries we don't assume the correct position to allow it. >
  
  I've seen tons of asian women poop over a squatting toilet over the years, and never seen one prolapse. >
  
  …why you watching so many women pooping >
  
  Unfortunately, purely by accident. I just watch so much porn that it ends up happening. >
  
  No... they lick themselves clean, and lick our faces WHILE sitting on our couches!! >
  
  The first part is ok. The second part made me recall all the moments I spent with my dog. >
  
  You kissed your dog with that mouth? >
  
  Nah you’re fine, dogs lick themselves, but humans lick each other >
  
  It’s because their rectum prolapses when they go. Meaning a small portion of their internal rectum comes out so the shit only touches what’s technically on the inside. When they’re done it goes back in leaving their external rectum clean. >
  
  Plus the lack of buttcheeks helps. >
  
  This chain reminded me of a joke: a bear is taking a shit in the woods and sees a rabbit and asks “Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?” To which the rabbit replies “No, not one bit!” So the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his ass >
  
  This deserves more upvotes >
  
  I wipe my dog with baby wipes when I get home after a walk.  This greatly reduces fecal matter and piss stains everywhere. Hells keeps the house smelling good too. People say when they come over that it rarely ever smells like dog in the house 🙂 >
  
  Yep. One wipe takes care of the paws and butt. >
  
  Idk I feel like that's not good for either the paws or the butt... >
  
  I just use the hypoallergenic wipes from Costco. I figure if they've been good enough for my baby then they're good enough for our dog. >
  
  I think they meant, it doesn't sound good to use the same wipe for both areas... >
  
  If they’ve been good enough for their baby then they’re good enough for their dog. >
  
  My dog is my baby. >
  
  Nah man I got a corgi and she sucks at cleaning her self. So I've wiped her bum quite a few times. I hate seeing her uncomfortable. So I'll help if I gotta. >
  
  Same.  I have an elderly puggle. She can’t reach to clean herself anymore, so I wipe her bum for her. >
  
  Good on you. >
  
  I remember when my dad pointed my dog and with full sincerity said “Hey how come HE doesn’t have to wipe his ass?” >
  
  your dads got a dirty crack >
  
  When i had a dog i wiped her with baby wipes after she pooped...so no worries of her being on the couch/bed with a dirty ass >
  
  Dogs actually have cleaner rectums than humans. The bacteria from their poop is good bacteria, like when we eat yogurt, and essentially cleans the rectum as they defecate. Bacillus rectafarus is the species of bacteria that…. And actually I have no idea what I’m talking about and made that all but it could be true >
  
  Ever watch a dog shit?  Prolapsed anus…. I also have a short haired dog so that helps.  His butthole looks like mandalorians helmet >
  
  The reason we have to wipe is that we are bipeds. Dogs don’t get quite so dirty. >
  
  can you elaborate >
  
  Ass cheeks i assume >
  
  oooh yeah >
  
  We pay price for our booty. >
  
  Booty tax? >
  
  Stank tax >
  
  No no no my friend.
  They lick it clean, and then we let them lick our faces. >
  
  Hey, we cat owners know this well:
  "Living with a cat means coming to terms with the fact that every horizontal surface of the house has been kissed by their little kitty butthole!" (or will be...) 😼 >
  
  And litter box feet. >
  
  My father in-law wipes his dog every time he goes outside..humorous…but clean >
  
  Talk for yourself. When my dog comes home from a walk he goes into the shower and his butt gets a quick rinse. And if I cannot do this I have wet wipes with me.
  And he clean himself by licking. >
  
  Your dog gets a shower after every time he goes out? >
  
  Yes, but not with shampoo. I mostly use cold or warm water. And I only clean the parts that are dirty. He is very small. So his belly and paws are always dirty. And I like to rinse his butt. The other parts of the body only get cleaned if he rolled in something. 
  My dog is allowed in my bed and on my couch. He has to be clean for this. >
  
  Incorrect, my dog would wipe herself on our carpet as a puppy. >
  
  Take a shot every time fecal matter is mention in this thread >
  
  Clearly someone doesn't own a Bulldog or is familiar with a "Tail Pocket". >
  
  My partner lets her dogs up on her bed all the time, I sat on her bed once with my coat on and she was upset because I wore something from outside on her bed.  I responded with the fact that her dogs literally pee then walk through it whenever they go out for a washroom break, and she got angry with me.  I just don't understand sometimes >
  
  Yeah that's obviously nonsense on your partner's side. My hygiene standards simply dropped when I got a puppy and I adapted and that's the end of it. Wiping off paws and wet fur with a towel after coming in is all I do, the rest is training for my immune system I guess. >
  
  I know a couple that walks their dog with poop bags and baby wipes. The dog shits, they pick it up and wipe the asshole with a baby wipe and puts that in the poop bag. I get it but it’s still fuckin weird. >
  
  I do that with my dogs. They sleep on my bed, and sometimes they sit with their asshole exposed to whatever surface they’re on. That’s gnarly… so they get wiped down.