>

Can you also write your response in the style of Steve Martin’s The Jerk?
Edit: forgot my actors
He really didn't think they could see his searches or the stuff he went and bought? >

Duh, incognito mode! >

I know this is a joke but Google is facing huge fines worldwide because Incognito mode still tracks your search history. >

I mean it says that it can be seen >

But it's wearing glasses and a hat.. >

My name is Guy Incognito >

“your honor, guy incognito is a hacker and a murderer! he appears on everyone’s websites and buys all the necessary stuff to carry out one!” >

His attorney said the evidence against him is "not strong".
Maybe because he learned on google to cover the evidence in baking soda? >

his search history included "discount lawyers". >

Never a bad choice. >

“How to clear Google history after searching for suspect things given your wife’s mysterious and recent death” >

Step 1: Get a supermagnet.
Step 2: Take computer to body disposal site.
Step 3: Run magnet over computer like you're scrubbing the dishes she asked you to do last night.
Step 4: Place next to body for convenience
Step 5: Access public computer at library and delete your Google account
Step 6: Await authorities as we notified them before we autocompleted this query. >

He should have just binged on some Dexter. Dumbass >



“The story is really coming together, and those Google searches, they were essential to putting together the pieces,”


Putting together the pieces? Really? That’s some unfortunate phrasing. >

Someone call Scooby-Doo >

If he’d used Bing…things might have been different >

Or internet explorer. He’d still be waiting for it to load. >

Smart. By the time it loads, his wife would truely be decomposed >

Dumbest murderer ever… thankfully. >

Here are some of his searches 
December 27:
"What’s the best state to divorce for a man?'
She went missing on January 1st. 
4:55 a.m. on Jan. 1: “how long before a body starts to smell”
4:58 a.m. on Jan. 1: “how to stop a body from decomposing”
5:20 a.m. on Jan. 1: “how to embalm a body”
5:47 a.m. on Jan. 1: “10 ways to dispose of a dead body if you really need to”
6:25 a.m. on Jan. 1: “how long for someone to be missing to inherit”
6:34 a.m. on Jan. 1: “can you throw away body parts”
9:29 a.m. on Jan. 1: “what does formaldehyde do”
9:34 a.m. on Jan. 1: “how long does DNA last”
9:59 a.m. on Jan. 1: “can identification be made on partial remains”
11:34 a.m. on Jan. 1: “dismemberment and the best ways to dispose of a body”
11:44 a.m. on Jan. 1: “how to clean blood from wooden floor”
11:56 a.m. on Jan. 1: “luminol to detect blood
1:08 p.m. on Jan. 1: “what happens when you put body parts in ammonia”
1:21 p.m. on Jan. 1: “is it better to throw crime scene clothes away or wash them”
12:45 p.m. on Jan. 2: “hacksaw best tool to dismember”
1:10 p.m. on Jan. 2: “can you be charged with murder without a body”
1:14 p.m. on Jan. 2: “can you identify a body with broken teeth”
1:02 p.m. on Jan. 3: “what happens to hair on a dead body”
1:13 p.m. on Jan. 3: “what is the rate of decomposition of a body found in a plastic bag compared to on a surface in the woods”
1:20 p.m. on Jan. 3: “can baking soda make a body smell good”
Poor woman. The "broken teeth" bit hurts to read.... poor woman.
Thus creep can go to hell >

Dude shoulda just asked chat gpt