>

I’m…starting to like this guy for all the wrong reasons.
Does this guy even exist? >

BREAKING: George Santos revealed to be three raccoons standing on top of each other. >

Breaking: raccoons revealed to be possums in masks and fur coats. >

BREAKING: possums in masks revealed to just be a broom. >

I was waiting for this to end with a broom, thank you. >

It was supposed to end with turtles all the way down >

you are thinking of Mitch >

sir this is a wendy’s >

No, this is Patrick! >

Founder of Wendy's... and we just received  word it's a George Santos' scam >

He's lived quite a life. Or maybe he hasn't; it's pretty hard to tell conclusively. >

He lived quite a lie. >

I am DYING to know whether he’s at all stressed by being caught in these HUGE lies. Like, what’s going through your head? I imagine most people would be shitting their pants but maybe by like the tenth hugely embarrassing blatant lie that makes international headlines it loses its edge? It’s just another day in the life of (the alleged) George Santos? Is he tossing and turning and losing sleep over this? Or is he totally unfazed by it? >

I’d probably resign out of shame itself. I mean I bet at least some of the scrutiny is because he hasn’t yet. >

yaaaa
As soon as the wwe announcer voice kicks in, you know it's ending poorly. >

This is like Catch Me if You Can if the protagonist was weird and dumb. >

I mean you call him dumb, but he:

Lied to everyone's faces right out in the open
Got elected
Got committee placements
Probably collecting all sorts of money under the table. 

As terrible as he is, he'll probably never see actual consequences and will probably make a lot of money. >

Idk he’s under federal investigation, easily could land him in prison. I’d not trade places with him right now. Also pretty sure he’ll be voted out of office in 2024 anyway, after which he will be unemployable. >

I'll wait for any of these people to see any consequences before I start having hope. 
I'm sure he'll get voted out, but he will have already made his money, probably have a book deal, and have some sort of pundit deal on some sort of terrible network. 
We are in the worst timeline after all. >

Good thing even a rich person can become destitute with a single hospital bill. U S A. U S A. >

Hell, I got a $30k raise when I switched to my new job, and because it's a smaller company, instantly about $10k of that raise was just paying for the difference in health insurance. Nothing like paying $1400 a month for a $10k family deductible plan that won't pay a dime in 99% of cases, because I never hit the deductible, and even if I finally did, they'd do everything in their power to avoid paying out the claims. >

You can't make this stuff up. >

Ironically, the one thing he can't make up. >

Hahaha 🤣 if l had some award l'd give it to ya >

I got you, fam. >

I got you too, fam >

Everyone also got me, fam >

Swing and a miss, fam. >

Fam a lam a ding dong >

Christ, I need to start selling Santos Bingo cards. >

I have thought the same thing. You need a sex with an extraterrestrial square.
Edit: Science, Space and Technology Committee? This is not an idle suggestion. >

The lying and the grifting seemed to be fine with the GOP, but will they tolerate the drag? >

Rudy Giuliani wore drag. Those were some of his better days. >

Rudy was an extremely unattractive woman. >

And is an extremely unattractive man. >

And is an extremely unattractive piece of shit. >

Reminder - nothing wrong with being a drag queen - what’s cringeworthy is the hypocrisy >

Also drag and being trans are not the same, at all. >

Also, conservatives love drag for some reason. Remember when that Trump/Giuliani video came back around a few years ago? Conservatives loved it and said that humor is a why they love Trump so much. >

Crossdressing is a staple of English boomer comedy >

Eddy Izzard >

I didn’t think Eddy was doing it for humor though. >

She's not. She's genderfluid. There aren't nearly enough prominent genderfluid people out there. >

Out and trans now. >

Another wild twist in this preposterous, disgraceful saga. Santos has turned out to be many of the things that Republicans publicly rail against, yet they have no intention of booting him. But a vote is a vote, so it's all ok >

All the Russian money he has and blackmail he has on others. >

There’s this and there’s memorial dog money he stole. George Santos does not fuck around. You could find him going through your drawers and to your face he’d go, “I’m not even here right now.” >

He would pretend to be you and say he was your name to your face. And think you would believe him. >

Reality is just trolling us at this point >

How is stealing money from a sick armed service dog not a breaking point. >

Republicans like war dogs that don't get cancer. >

we live in a simulation that is about to end and the 12-year-old kid at the controls has been fucking with us these past few years. >

The kid's not real either; it's simulations all the way up. >

Always has been >

Might be Fred Savage >

In his defense, Santos says he was just "drag-ish." >

We only know that because it was leaked as revenge for him admitting there are congressional cocaine orgies. Republicans gather dirty laundry on each other as blackmail to stay in line. >

How lame do you have to be to get invited to an orgy then go tattle about it. >

Cause crusty republican orgies sounds cringe af. Imagine Lindsay graham ripped on coke fucking a male prostitute while Ted Cruz jerks off in the corner cause he is a cuck. >

Something about him made me expect this! >

It’s the skin care routine! >

This motherfucker was grown in a lab by The Onion. >

Oh man—that’s brilliant. I’m gonna remember that >

Is there a legitimate reason why everyone is just letting this guy walk around with no accountability? >

No, but there are a million illegitimate and scummy ones, and those ones have more power for some reason. Or maybe it's no reason, I can't keep up with the fucked up joker like entity running this fuckin' reality anymore. >

This is becoming a meme. I can't keep up. >

When do we start putting quotes around "George Santos's" name? >

Leaning into the gay/drag thing is probably the only way to get the GOP to boot this grifter. He's otherwise a role-model republican. >

Nah he stole from a rich donor so they'll turn on him >

His drag name was Hedda Lettuce >

Because OF COURSE he was a gay, drag queen. Fucking of course. I swear to God, just listen to whatever these assholes are crusading against at any given moment and then wait until it comes out that they are the ones doing it. I wish there was an S in their name so I could add "Self Loathe" to Gaslight. Obstruct. Project. >

GOPs? >

House Republicans are at the point (and have been for some time) where it’ll have to be a ‘dead girl or live boy’ scandal for them to do anything. Hypocrisy doesn’t even faze them anymore. >

I'm questioning just how bad one of those scenarios would be. A day in time out? No afternoon cookie and cigarette? >

Alright Santos bingo card time: 
Claimed that he served in the IDF | Claimed that he slept with a famous gay celebrity  | Was once a member of the Communist party | Involved in a puppy mill  | Faked his own death at least once 
---|---|----|----|----|----
Isn't a US citizen | claimed he was allergic to meat | Claimed that he worked at the Mint | Wanted in europe | Has multiple illegitimate children 
falsified votes for primary run  | Claimed that he was in danger from the cartels | Free Space: made campaign promises | Involved in an immigration scam | Already stealing shit from the capitol building
Wore a butt plug on the house floor | claimed to be a recovering alcoholic | attempted to blackmail a NY GOP official | Claimed that he stormed the capitol | Has an incurable STD 
Took money from an actual FSB agent | doubles down on a lie on live TV | Excuses a lie with a more insane sob story | claims he has an evil twin | performed sexual favors for a congressman >

This guy is like a hundred red flags in a trenchcoat >

This might actually be the deal breaker for republicans. Lying ,not a problem. Stealing from charity, not a problem, fake resume, not a problem.  Being a drag Queen.  That goes too far. >

How many republicans are secret drag queens? Jim Jordan anyone? Mike Pence? I bet Kitara knows the truth and the republicans will stop at nothing to keep it a secret. >

There’s no way Jim Jordan would walk around with that janky ass haircut if he were even acquainted with one single Queen. >

LMAO, this shit like a comedy/tragegy show at this moment >

Hey, I’m going to nitpick the title a little, but I feel like I should say that dressing in drag and being trans are two different things. 
Both are fine. Some trans people do drag. But drag is a performance and a costume. Transphobes like to equate trans women with drag queens because they think of us as “men in dresses.”
Anyway, I’m sure that’s not what the OP was doing here. But I felt like I should point it out. >

This is gonna make a great movie some day. George santos makes the Catch Me If You Can guy look like an amateur >

This country is truly under attack and sanity is losing. >

This guy’s basically Carmen Sandiego at this point >

"Who in the world is George Santos?" >

His real name is Randall Flagg. >

In Korea he was known as Colonel Sam Flagg. >

Some know him as Walter O’Dim >

GOP gonna start giving him the Cawthorn treatment now >

I just can’t take the hypocrisy.
Worse than that is knowing what you do, and who you are in your private life and denying that to other people for personal gain.  I couldn’t live with myself. >

JFC the GQP will end him over this I hope.  Drag queens are the new boogie men. >

Nah, they will try to white wash it as "see how inclusive we are" while at the same time trying to make anyone who isn't a white Christian male or married to one illegal.
He does check all the boxes...  He's a political q-bit.  He's a superposition of all possible minorities and none of them. >

When you can't tell the satire articles from the real thing anymore, you know you're watching a grade-A dumpster fire. >

In other news West Virginia is trying to ban “transgender exposure” to minors. Can cis people please focus on things that actually matter to us trans people? >

Banning "Transgender Exposure" helps NOBODY including Cis people... its just their normal brand of hate. >

I will only refer to this person as “Kitara” from now on. >

This guy's like a Russian doll >

I could see a news headline about Santos unzipping himself and revealing that he’s actually the cast of Homeward Bound and I wouldn’t be surprised 
Is anything about this man real? >

I just heard a rumour that he’s really a hologram and comes from the planet Zog. Makes pretty good sense - given what we think we might (or might not) really know about the, er, man. >

Lolol
I've repeatedly made a similar point. Are we sure George is even a human. And not a extra terrestrial cosplaying, and pranking us >

I am so intrigued, and perplexed as to how the hell he got as far as he did in the process!? There needs to be a movie about this guy lol. >

Pretty soon he’s gonna claim to be Batman >

Not all liers wear capes. >

Are we sure this is not a John Oliver prank that went too far >

Also claimed his mother survived being in one of the twin towers during 9/11, but died 3 years later of cancer. When in fact she left the country in 1999 and didn't return until 2003. >

I thought it was odd that McCarthy caved to this guy. 
Remember a few years ago the conservative reporter scandal where the guy let into the conservative press core was outed as a gay porn star? 
I'd bet there's something else going on here with McCarthy and Santos and the rest of the "new conservatives" that seems to be oddly attracted to sex crimes like Gaetz.
I'd look to see if McCarthy took any trips to Brazil or places where Santos was nearby.  Hmmmm >

These Sacha Baron Cohen stunts are getting elaborate. >

I’m convinced this motherfucker doesn’t even exist. >

Next we will find out he isn’t even a citizen >

We probably will. This whole thing is making me really angry with the media, but the NYT even more so. This was in their own backyard and they didn’t even bother to call attention to the information that Long Island newspapers already put out there. That is straight up mediocre journalism. >

Finally a reason for republicans to turn against him. >

I’m waiting for the videos of his drag queen days to come out.  🍿🍿🍿 >

It just keeps getting more and more ridiculous. This would be hilarious if it weren't also so scary and sad. >

Republicans in a pickle now. >

I bet the GOP is leaking some of this info.  Look at all the headlines dedicated to this clown recently?  Is anybody paying attention to whatever excuse for policy the rest of the party is pushing?  No, we’re too busy being distracted by this jack hole. >

After all the reprehensible things he’s done, dressing in drag may be the thing that actually sinks him with the Republican Party. >

Everything I have learned about this guy has been against my will >

I feel so sorry for organizations like The Onion because how do you make up funny news stories when reality comes up with shit like this? >

Russian Oligarch donated to him. How do we know Russian didn’t put him up just to troll us to how fucked our elections are? >

Well, yeah, back then all-ages drag shows were winning Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice season finales... >

How has this guy avoided the "groomer" label?  It's almost as if Republicans don't actually believe their own propaganda, or if they do, they are fine with child predation on their team. >

i could see this being the straw that breaks the camels back and gets him ousted from holding office..theyll back all the other scummy shit but drag is a no no. >

Honestly this keeps getting better and better.  Can’t wait to see what’s next! >

GOP -Every accusation is a confession >

It's clear he chose Republicans, not for their views, but for their gullibility and complete lack of moral fiber. >

What? How? This can't be true. He's so very masculine. /s >

Before I get excited I am going to wait for a bigger outlet with a hardier legal department to vet this. A blurry newspaper clipping aint it. >

Of course he did. Tomorrow pictures of him in a diaper, pacifier and shaking rattle will come out. The picture was taken last year. >

I feel like George Santos is deep within the Tyson Zone by now being that lately none of the shit that's coming out about him is fazing me even in the slightest. >

This lying dingbat is like the headlines from “The Onion” only they fucking real. >

Whenever I see this guy I can only think of Robby from the show New Girl, which sucks because Robby is one of the best characters in that show and I don’t want to associate the two :( >

The GQP are very repressed. A lot of issues there. >

Has this reached sitcom level of parody in reverse? >

Will be really funny is he's actually a Democrat. After all he lied about everything else. >

I got 10 bucks on the next headline being he murdered his mom on 9/11 causing covid >

Nothing the GQP does surprises me anymore >

Mark my words, the drag queen background is the line in the sand that will cost Santos/Devolder/Kitara his committee assignments and spot in the house.
Fraud is tolerated…..nay welcomed by the GQP — but they’ll be damned if they allow any non-binary person into their ranks. George bout to be yeeted like Madison Cawthorn. >

I don't understand why republicans accept him as a congressman. >

This may be a prerequisite for the hypocrite party coming up. >

Could you imagine having to be this guy’s Communications Director? >

This is just getting to be so ridiculous. I can't with this guy. >

He copied Trumps playbook, run as a Republican because they’re easy to fool. >

Is it ok to call him “Jewish Hershel walker”? >

*Jew-ish
FIFY >

Jesus christ. Where does it end with this fella???
Of course the republicans put him on a committee, too. >

Can someone please tell me who the fuck is this guy. >

How is every headline I see about this guy more outlandish than the last >

This story keeps getting wilder and wilder. Do we ever reach the point where they throw him under the bus? >

Not with a 5 vote margin we won’t. >

I’m beginning to think this guy might be Quantum Leaping >

Holy shit, I can't believe the plot twists this season. The show-writers have outdone themselves, truly. >

Every day. Every. Single. Day. Every day there’s something new about this jackass. >

Uh oh. Just like Madison Cawthorne, he’ll be done in by some crossdressing, not all the other terrible shit he’s done. >

So, like so many of the other radical Right-wingers, he had things to hide and was somehow plucked out of nowhere to suddenly become a wealthy Republican member of Congress.
Where have we seen this nonsense before?
It's as though the top of the Republican food-chain (Donald Trump) used the government spy system to gather evidence on people who could be blackmailed, threatened, or bought to do their bidding. All these crazies appear to be simple puppets of Trump and perhaps Putin.
Can this go well? No.
What can be done about it? Shame them? Ha. They have no shame. But, revealing and shaming it is as a starter. After that who knows. >

This guy is a walking soap opera!
I bet he has had amnia, been assumed dead, and then cloned only to return alive. 
Through all this, he just can’t get together with his true love. >

This is really his evil twin. >

He fits right in for all them sexually oppressed tight wingers >

well, now I just want to know what volleyball team he played on? >

i hope no innocent children were able to witness his drag show. that would be a modern felony in these parts. /s >

This fking guy.
 This fking guy needs serious mental help. What the fuck is going on?!?! >

Thus making him fully qualified to serve as a Republican member of Congress - Probably some Member of Congress that has lobbied against gay rights and gets arrested blowing a guy in a bus stop restroom. >

J.C. Rice, I hope someone out there is updating his wiki in real time because it’ll be a helluva read by the time everything comes out. >

Santos is the gift that keeps on giving. >

It keeps getting better >

This is the most bizarre one yet >

Bruh how many name does this dude have?? How the f*** does he keep track of it too >

Republican politicians and media sure make a lot of noise about drag shows and sexual preferences... It's like they think about it A LOT. >

It’s a universal constant that whatever they publicly scream about is what they hide in the closet.
That’s why I’m completely against masturbating with fossils. >

Sashay away >

What is wrong with republican these days? They need to get their shit together. >

Honestly this is just lazy writing. Even for god. >

This is the most dedicated troll in history. >

I am truly impressed with how much this young man has done in his life. Real talk. >

Clearly a false flag operater sent by Dems to make the GOP look bad.  Right? Right?
/s >

Fuck off.  No.  It's too much.  You have to at least run the simulation as if it were a little bit believable. >

Is he even a US citizen?  Because at this point, I have serious doubts.... >

Is he a groomer in Marge’s eyes now? >

Can we please find journalists and news outlets which will only refer to him as Ms. Kitara Racache, including when seeking comment in person? >

Reminder to cis allies that being trans has nothing to do with drag, but this sure shows hypocrisy from the GOP again >

My, my, how the trans tables. >

You know, the GOP obviously wasn't going to turn on him for stealing money from a veteran's fundraiser and letting his dog die. 
But drag is a different story! For them. >

Bro Ive been reading one crazy new thing about him every day now who is he LOL >

What a weird wonderful world this is. >

Watch this be the thing that gets him ousted >

kudos to Kevin McCarthy for appointing a drag queen to committees. >

He looks very deep in the closet >

This just gets weirder and weirder. Is this guy some kind of Batman villain who’s superpower is lying? >

Is he a servant of Tzeentch? Or Loki? Or the Alpha Legion? Who and what the fuck is this person? >

Do we get weekly update lies and cons from this guy until next election or what? >

This fucker is like an onion of shame and fuckery. >

What kind of lying has this guy NOT done? Everyday it’s something new. >

Oh man, I feel like they're about to shut down our simulation. >

Yawn.
Tell me when y'all are going to take action against George Santos and then I'll listen. This constant posting about him while not doing anything about him is basically yelling at clouds. >

I bet it was even more amazing than the time you saved those old folks from that nursing home fire....
or, more amazing than the time Michael Jackson came over to your house to use the bathroom...
or, even more amazing than the time you are your weight in Godfather's pizza? >

Every American should be as offended as possible. Weve had our faces spit in. Hardworking people across the country are struggling to provide for their homes, our government just blocked a strike denying folks proper pay and days off, corporate greed at an all time high. And yet weve got clowns putting on such a show to distract everyone. How the fuck are any of these fucking people in charge. Fuck this shit >

This guy's a real piece of work, I'm starting to think >

Moment I saw him I assumed he did drag. He just has that look of men who do drag before they make themselves up >

how can anyone be coherent enough to  crack jokes at a time like this, when the fabric of reality appears to be folding into kinky origami >

Does this make him a self-hating Jewish? >

Is this guy actually the next Bansky performance piece? >

This dude is like a fucking Mad Lib >

It feels like every day we discover something new and controversial about this bizarre person. >

the jokes write themselves >

He’s a foreign asset right? >

Bruh they are tearing this guy to shreds politically >

At this point this fucker seems like a massive troll. Next week we will find out who he killed. >

This has to be a GOP plant at this point. Just to capture all this media attention. Has to be. It’s too insane. >

What does drag have to do with being trans? >

No one cares what words mean anymore. >

Bahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahaha… breath hahahahahahahhahahahahahaha
(This post in no way is laughing at drag events or performers—you rock.)
The GOP electing a drag performer on accident is my favorite part of 2023. My fingers are crossed that Gaetz gets caught smuggling immigrants across the border, or maybe MTG has a secret lover of the female persuasion. >

what else new we going to find out about this guy lol >

Both the BBC News Quiz and Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me dragged this dude hilariously in their most recent programs.  He’s no longer a news scandal, he’s a byword for outrageously over the top embellishment.  Good thing he’s already got some aliases, cause the name George Santos is beyond recovery at this point.
There is a whole generation of men named “George Santos” who need to look into name changes post haste. >

LMAO love or hate it this guy is going to be the source of many movies and books and probably get rich AF off all this. >

Of course he did. >

You can't make this stuff up. Give it another 6 mo and he will be the poster boy for the party next to mtg >

The only time he used his creative powers in a good non harming way. >

The Un-Talented Mr Devol-Santos >

Oh well Republicans will definitely be calling for him to resign now. >

Bro is trolling Fr fr >

He's becoming quite the parody. I'm starting to wonder if he's not an elaborate Kaufmanesque prank. I'm now waiting for him to say "Tank you veddy much".