>

There are definitely people I know that are not attractive if you just saw a neutral photo of them, but their confidence and charisma make you feel drawn to them and make them more attractive. 
I’ve also know attractive people that are withdrawn and shy, that you don’t realise how attractive they are because they have such a closed off personality.
Never base childs confidence on his/hers looks which they did nothing to earn them, that's not a strong base, base on character. On the other hand, no matter how your child looks, he/she should be comfortable in their looks, certainly don't feel ugly, even if they don't meet "the criteria" which is subjective. >

Pssst... you're going to get old and wrinkly one day. 
Life doesn't care what you want. With your current outlook, you'd better hope that you stay lucky enough to avoid accidents/tragedies that impact your face. Car accidents, tumors, building collapses, a new autoimmune problem, a stray transport tire, a fire, a falling object, etc can all happen to you unexpectedly. You won't magically be safe from them just because you dislike ugly people.
I hope they don't happen to you, but you'd currently be screwed if it does happen, based on your response. Would you lose all of your self-worth, or would you try to find other things to be proud of? Your attitude implies the former, which is not good. I hope that you have other things that you are proud of. If you don't, you should try to find some, even if it's a hobby. No one is good at everything, but everyone is good at something.
ETA: A bad personality/attitude can easily make a "10" into a "2". Life's way too short to deal with people who prefer judging over self-improvement. You can't guarantee that you'll see tomorrow. >

If you are the parent of a 500 lb minor, you deserve to be in prison for child endangerment (unless there’s some medical reason for the extreme obesity). >

There is only one extremely rare disease that makes hunger continuous that would count as an excuse. Other than that, no other disease makes you eat in a caloric surplus. >

Antipsychotic medications can make people insatiable.  Some kids need them.  
But yeah, Prader-Willi syndrome is as real as it is rare. >

That's what parents are for. No kid will starve to death and die from an increased appetite that's regulated by the parents. But they will die from obesity. >

I believe that parents should not emphasize/place a lot of importance on/ mention frequently their child's physical appearance in any context, whether the child is above average, average, or below average in looks.  So I agree that parents should not tell an unattractive child that he or she is physically beautiful, but they should also not tell an attractive child he or she is beautiful, either. >

I'd extend this to say you shouldn't overvalue any trait that is outside of the kids control. 
My generation is full of former "smart" kids who burnt out and failed as soon as they hit a roadblock at least in part because we were constantly told how smart we were when our school work wasn't challenging. As soon as we did get challenged for the first time, suddenly we must not be "smart" anymore, we had no idea how to overcome an obstacle, and the whole foundation fell out beneath us. 
Kids who are rewarded for being hard working, or creative, or good problem solvers, have much better short term and long term outcomes than kids who are just told they're smart. I'd say the same goes for any other inherent trait vs one the kid can actually control >

There’s a difference between teaching your child how much appearance matters (which is necessary), and being harmful by degrading them. Attractiveness is a factor in everything.
The vast majority of people who think they’re ugly are very capable of elevating themselves to at least a 5/10. Yes, some people simply lost the lottery, and some people simply won the lottery when it comes to genetics. But most people were born somewhere in the middle, and their choices have led to their appearance.
So what I’m saying is, the importance of keeping yourself up should be taught, regardless of how naturally attractive you are. Far too many people fall into the trap of thinking they always have been and always will be ugly no matter what. >

Exactly this. I see so many ugly people who you can tell have just given up, they don't even do the basics like combing their hair or wearing clothes that don't look like they got them from a bin. 
It's not hard for someone to take a little bit of time to tidy up their appearance but instead, we have this new 'movement' which is seeking to remove all notions of standards which essentially says, everyone is beautiful no matter what. This leads to people not doing a damn thing with their appearance and thinking they are attractive.
Anyone see footage from the 50s when people used to dress nicely when they were in public? This idea should be the standard expectation of people in public. But now for some reason, shame and dignity have been removed from the equation and we see people in their damn pyjamas at the supermarket. >

The supermarket? You should see how people dress in the office. You'd think half of them just came in from weeding the garden. But most people don't subscribe to the idea that apparances are important any longer. >

Friend visited me after the pandemic started to wind down. She didn't change or shower the entire time. Pijamas the entiretime. It was soooo disgusting. She was lazy and selfish and on her phone the entire time. She never used to be like this. Ive seen a lot of these slides for a lot of people, I think the pandemic fucked things up in lasting ways. It's so dramatic to see evidence of this everywhere, especially with how people dress and their hygiene. >

Obviously off topic to the thread, but I do think you're correct in that Covid has really changed attitudes and behavoirs accross the board. Half of it doesn't even make sense. But we didn't come out on the other side any better off for it, that's for certain. People are messed up. >

This is silly, because confidence is fantastic and ugly confident people succeed all the time. The problem in your scenario is if a child weighs 500 lbs, their parents have already failed them anyway and they aren’t listening to this type of advice. >

If a child weighs 500 lbs, they are not ugly, they are just fat af and they need to lose weight immediately. >

Don’t be fat and ugly, just be ugly! >

It’s called pick your struggle. Like don’t be broke and ugly >

Parents think their kids are the closest thing to perfection. Guess it’s a biological mechanism, to ensure unconditional love.
A friend of mine wanted to sign up her daughter at a modeling agency when she was 3 because she thought she was so beautiful. No one else I knew seemed to agree, we just nodded and remained silent. >

Old enough to remember “it’s the inside is what counts,” a way healthier and honest message than “everyone is beautiful.” >

It’s so frustrating seeing how a movement that was meant to be about how “everybody/every body is worthy of basic respect and dignity even if you don’t find them attractive” became “everybody/every body is beautiful” because why address the problem at hand that beauty is equated to self worth when you can launch thousands of ad campaigns to capitalize on people’s insecurities. >

Dude creates an alt just to make this post >

This is such an uninformed opinion. Nobody thinks they look good because their mom said so. If anything, most people have extremely low self-esteem and constantly blow up their flaws. >

I have read that actually, most people rate themselves as more attractive than they are. >

Attractiveness is 100% subjective. They are exactly as attractive as they feel they are. Maybe not to everyone, but your opinion of their looks does not discredit their assessment. >

Do you really believe it’s 100% subjective? It definitely is quite subjective, but there’s a reason there’s a general consensus that some actors are really attractive and that traits like obesity are unattractive. Because they have some amount of objective attractiveness >

I would attribute that more to group think than anything else. Theres a general consensus, but you generally only get the opinions of people who care. How many people make up this general consensus...1000? 1 million? 300 million? Its subjective in that its how the person looking perceived it. If you find it attractive, it is. If I find the exact same thing unattractive, the same is also true. 
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Things like beauty exist only as YOU perceive them >

Do you not believe the fact that we are a biological system with motivations given to us by this system? It's easy to abstract things out and imagine yourself as always at the helm of your motivations and decisions but we already know this isn't true. We don't prefer wide hips because of group think nor are we the only species with permanent breasts outside periods of lactation in all mammals on Earth because of group think and those are just 2 examples. >

If you look at history, you see how beauty standards changed A LOT during the different periods and in the different cultures. This is a big proof that it has a lot to do with "group think" >

Actually historical beauty standards don't say much about the real beauty standards people had before, because most of history is from point of view of a quite distinct slice of society. We may never know for real what average European found attractive in 1300s. >

Got turned down by a fat girl huh? >

💀 >

I don’t want to meet the parent that does not think their children are absolutely beautiful. My kids may not be lookers in other peoples eyes, but they are absolutely beautiful to me - hands down the best looking kids on the planet and I would not change a thing. >

I feel this.
I don't feel like either her dad or I are objectively mainstream attractive. 
But daaammmnnnn, my baby got the best of both of us. >

I'm worried about this with my daughters. They will be gorgeous women, and I'm slightly concerned that people's first reaction is that I'm their step father🤣 because there's no way they got their looks from me, lol >

I don’t think society should place inherent worth of someone based on looks so yeah, cool. But I would say the same to my child no matter how they look. >

In an ideal world, yes. This is and will never be that - Everyone values individuals how most people do 1. Looks  2. Supreme Talent  3. Intelligence/Resources (Wealth or Power) >

Oh I'm ugly and my mom definitely made me know it haha >

Damn >

I bet OP is one of the ugliest people they've seen. >

At least they’re likely self aware lmao >

The fact that someone feels good with themselves and confortable in their own skin doesn't mean they aren't concious of their flaws. You can control your Instagram feed btw you just have to follow those profiles that show people with the physical features you like, parents can and should tell their kids they're precious no matter how they are because there's a lot of bitter people like you who will tell them the "cruel truths" they don't need that kind of energy at their own homes. >

It’s not even that, the only reason to say those things, is to be mean, it’s to hurt someone. The person hurting usually needs a reason, and that reason is usually massive insecurities. We hurt with what we know will hurt ourselves. Raising your child to realize they have value is important, and to not take seriously the judgement of others when their own feelings and beliefs are important and valid too. >

I actually think that this post reeks of insecurity, and yes is allways insecure people who gives too much value to looks over everything, and that insecurities usually start at home when parents give too much criticism, althoug they should teach their kids they have value in other aspects too, but to teach them they're ugly it will make them more insecure not less. >

I'm sorry my confidence and ability to love myself is offensive to you. >

So who is going to tell the stupid ones the sad truth? 🤔 >

🤫 one thing at a time >

Beauty is subjective. Just because you think someone is ugly doesn't make them ugly to everyone. >

I have evolutionary biology and evolutionary psychology on the line. They want a word with you. >

I promise you that someone you think is 100% beautiful and perfect will be the ugliest fuck I’ve ever seen in my life >

We find the same traits attractive because they signal genetic fitness and optimal health, which everyone values. >

So how should ugly people carry themselves? They deserve a fair shot at love and success just like anybody else. >

Of course, but let’s not beat around the bush and tell them they’re good looking when they have a face like a dropped pie. >

Oh boy… So if they’re not that bright, should we tell them they’re stupid too? 
I doubt you have children, but if you do, prepare to scar them for life. 
And where is this 500 lb daughter scenario coming from? Do you have a real life example of this? 
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, my dude. >

You get an upvote bc this is definitely unpopular and going to trigger someone lol >

It isn't at all... Some "ugly" people are gaining confidence because they've realized beauty is subjective but just because that mindset has grown doesn't mean the idea that they're ugly isn't still popular. I mean look at everyone in this thread agreeing. Look at majority of the movie/tv stars, porn actors/actresses, celebrities, models and etc, majority of them still fit the "convenient" attractive model.
This opinion isn't unpopular at all. >

Do people actually do this? My parents are the exact opposite lmao. My mum even told me to stop eating lunch to keep fit when I was in secondary school. >

My mum would tell me how handsome I was when I was younger. Yesterday she told me I was ‘podging up in the middle and should do something about it’. >

She says the same to me >

Focus on healthy bodies not “pretty” ones. I’ll never forget how heartbroken my 9year old daughter was when she came home from school where another girl called her ugly. She wasn’t crying, she just wouldn’t speak much. She was quiet for days. 
Kids being made to feel like they are gods beautiful gift seem to turn around and make others feel worthless on purpose. Let’s make beautiful personalities a thing! There are so many ugly ones out there to battle with each day. >

Ugly is subjective. Everyone is as beautiful as they believe, screw societal standards. >

It's not society. It's evolution. It's biology. It's genetics. >

Fun fact: beauty standards change based on culture and even time period.
But now you’ll say that you use the word beauty differently from everyone. >

You need to familiarise yourself with the work of David Buss, Robert Sapolsky, Geoffrey Miller, Satoshi Kanazawa, Steven Pinker, Nancy Etcoff, John Tooby, Leda Cosmides, Edward Dutton, Diana Fleischman, Jonathan Haidt and Gad Saad. The sheer tonnage of data they have arrayed against the stagnant tabula rasa doctrine will keep you busy for years. >

Your first ever post on Reddit and this is what you pick? >

My son is at that age where he stinks, he's kind of chubby, and his teeth are sticking out everywhere. It's still beautiful because it's a natural part of becoming an adult and wondrous how we go from one cell to a whole ass grown human. Kids are often self conscious going through these awkward phases and they need to hear that they're beautiful. They're growing in body, mind, and hopefully character and these are rights of passage. Nobody is supposed to find kids attractive so if you aren't calling them beautiful as a person, what are you complementing them on? >

Hey, OP, you sound pretty ugly on the inside. I think, for your own sake, maybe you should just keep quiet and let the inner beautiful people speak. In the long run, you'll be happier because we'd hate how ugly you'll show us you are.
OP, if you change your mind, you will have improved your inner self to not hideous. >

Being attractive often comes from confidence. Unless you have some huge disfigurement, confidence and the way you carry yourself will factor into how attractive people think you are. >

are people attractive because of their confidence or are attractive people more confident because they are attractive hmm