comment: >
  
  Ahh. So no then
context: Spoiler alert: only the foot was in the hot spring. Everything else, they found in his car (note, money, etc.).
  Edit: Clarified “everything else.” >
  
  I know you mean everything else as in the poems and stuff, but my first thought was that they found the rest of the body in the car. >
  
  Now that you’ve mentioned it  I should’ve clarified what I meant by “everything else.” >
  
  Bigfoot sends his regards. >
  
  Bigfoot sent his foot. >
  
  The $447 is mine, thanks.  I don't know anything about the other items. >
  
  That’s where I left my other foot! >
  
  What about the right one? >
  
  This headline reminded me of the first time I visited Yellowstone was back in 1995 and I picked up a book titled "Death in Yellowstone", which had just been published. A rather macabre but interesting book about the various deaths that have occurred in the Park. Looks like a second edition was published in 2014. >
  
  I went to Yellowstone with my inlaws some 15 years ago or so. They hire a tour guide who happened to be the partner of the guy that wrote that book, so pretty much every place we went she'd tell us a story about somebody dying:
  "Look at this beautiful overview with the waterfall in the background. This is where the bride stepped off the cliff because her new husband told her to step back to get a better honeymoon picture... You see this fork in the road, that's where a woman was gored to death for getting too close to a bison calf... See that hot pool? That's where a guy made human & dog soup after trying to rescue his beloved pet."
  It was an interesting tour. >
  
  Man, I'd love that tour.
  A friend of mine used to be a ADA and then a criminal defense lawyer here in Houston and he mentioned that when he goes places he'll sometimes think, oh this were such and such murder or rape or assault occurred. >
  
  Asst District Attorney? Was trying to figure out how a friend of yours used to be the Americans with Disabilities Act. LOL >
  
  Must be fun at parties that don’t have accommodations with lower kitchen counters. >
  
  I’ve never been invited to parties. 🤔😳 >
  
  I’m still picturing a dude in a wheelchair being a buzzkill around the party stating how things are non compliant. 🥳 >
  
  Dudes in wheelchairs were always picked before me in dodgeball. 🤷🏻‍♂️ >
  
  lower profile, they're more difficult to hit. >
  
  He was 70 years old.  He slipped or something. >
  
  Only the poems can shed some light on this. But what do the poems say? >
  
  “I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth.” >
  
  Suicide by jumping into water so hot that it disintegrates flesh is…something. >
  
  That’s the neat part, most of them aren’t water!  Its acid >
  
  Hey, that is neat! >
  
  You can tell it's acid, by the way it is! >
  
  What the actual fuck is with everyone killing themselves in LITERAL, LABELED vats of acid thinking they’re hot springs? >
  
  First of all, they’re vats of boiling acid, thankyouverymuch. 
  Second, people are like, really dumb. Really, really dumb. Incomprehensibly dumb. Dumb to the point they look at actual, no-holds-barred nature and assume it’s held to the same safety standards and idiot-proofing as Disney World or something. I think it was just a couple years ago some parents decided to put their child on an actual bison and then proceeded to run for the hills after the bison yeeted the child like a game-winning field goal. >
  
  Jesus this comment. It’s cathartic. I worked in Yellowstone and I had no idea how dumb ppl were until I worked there. 
  I had to stop what I was doing so many times to yell at ppl to step away from the 1 ton bison minding its own business. Or stop enjoying my walk bc some fuckface decided he was going to walk off the designated trail, on top of paper thin crust that has boiling water right beneath it but it looks like solid ground. And then ppl who treated the pristine hot springs like a wishing well and actually THROW STUFF INTO THEM. I left that place hating tourists. 
  I could write a book. But if you want to read one, I recommend Death in Yellowstone. It’s a comprehensive history of all the deaths collected and each chapter is a way to die like Death by Bear, Death by Hot Spring. Enjoy. >
  
  That book should be turned into a small pamphlet and handed out with your entry pass. >
  
  They made the employees watch a video of a man get yeeted over a tree by a bison before we even entered the park. I think they should all have to pass a test before they can enter. >
  
  I’ll be honest, I really don’t get the bison thing. They’re goddamn MASSIVE. Even if that animal was domesticated and 100% guaranteed friendly or my money back, I would still be hesitant to get within spitting distance of it. But they’re not!! They’re wild goddamn animals!! And yet people are just like ‘Yeah, this seems fine’ and just walk right up and poke it in the butt. Like, has entitlement just entirely overridden your most basic, lizard-brain survival instincts wtf >
  
  I’ve heard someone ask where do they keep the bison at night. 
  Some ppl have zero comprehension that Yellowstone is not a zoo, but a wild fuckin park and that you’re a visitor in THEIR house. 
  And bc bison move around slow af, and look slow af, it takes ppl by complete surprise when they spring up 6ft with ease and can run your ass down at 30mph. They think they are just huge slow cows. >
  
  Let me tell you, when you are drunk and being chased by a cow, you will be surprised how fast that cow travels. Serpentine! >
  
  Turns out those hot springs, are very hot >
  
  The Grand Prismatic is basically a giant boiling kettle. The humidity that kicks off of it when you walk the platform is insane. >
  
  Who was that fool who decided to dive right into the hot spring thinking that it was just warm and not boiling? The guy was cooked like a lobster instantly. >
  
  A man chased his dog into the one near the entrance to the grand prismatic. They both died.
  There are also a lot of small pockets of hot springs around. I saw one as wide as a manhole cover and deeper than I could even see down to. >
  
  Welp, this is the last place on my places I want to visit list.. >
  
  Its very cool, I would highly recommend going. >
  
  
  Investigators using Google Translate found nothing suggesting a suicide note, according to their reports.
  
  Not sure using Google translate is sufficient to make this conclusion. >
  
  Also, why was the language in which he wrote the poems redacted? Is there some legal reason for this kind of thing I'm not aware of? >
  
  Since the whole Buddy Holly thing, the cops always like to be the ones to tell next of kin about a death, instead of letting the news do it. 
  And I can imagine there being enough assholes out there that if the language was released and isn't a common one, people could track down social media and find parents/friends asking for updates on someone who was visiting the park, just so they could tell them their loved one died. >
  
  But the guys name, age, and where he lived are in the first sentence of the article... >
  
  Damn, we’ll never know who it was or where he lived >
  
  A true mystery >
  
  I've never been to Yellowstone National Park. Are there just walking paths near the springs? No fencing? >
  
  Generally speaking, I think national parks aren't all that "hand-holdy" -- there are warning signs and paths and whatnot, but if you want to ignore those and get yourself boiled alive in a geothermal pool or trampled to death by a bison then that's your business. >
  
  Yep, National Parks are intended to preserve nature, not turn them into theme park attractions or fancy Zoos. >
  
  Which means PICK UP YOUR FUCKING TRASH, PEOPLE!!! 
  shakes fist >
  
  People who litter in national parks like Yellowstone should be force fed their trash, the sheer disrespect and carelessness is rage inducing. >
  
  I wish people would stop calling them hot springs. They're more like pools of acid. >
  
  Boiling springs >
  
  Mysterious....The case is afoot. >
  
  Sounds like there's a mystery a foot! >
  
  Whoa buddy. Take a step back. At least a foot or two. >
  
  Why not walk it off? >
  
  Well I got a kick out of it. >
  
  From the article: "More than 20 people have been killed by Yellowstone's geothermal pools, geysers,..."
  Probably should read more like "More than 20 people have died after doing stupid things around Yellowstone's geothermal pools, geysers,..." >
  
  Nothing says romance like handwritten poems. >
  
  The duttons got rid of the hippie chick >
  
  I was hoping this would lead to a Head and Shoulders joke >
  
  They've released one of the poems:
  "There was a man named Ro, it's true
  who wanted a place to relax that was new.
  He chose a hot pool
  Oh man what a fool
  All that was left was a foot in a shoe." >
  
  Americans, scared of spiders in Australia, yet fine with body melting hot springs that routinely take lives.
  You’re a weird lot. >
  
  Well when a body melting hot spring manages to find its way into my house I'll let you know. >
  
  It could happen. I hear Canada is safe. >
  
  It isn't, gravy shortages. Mad Max world up there now. Mutant beavers and the like. >
  
  Australia is exactly like max max. This is the only proper stereotype that should be promoted. >
  
  Any black armor, swords, coconut shells etc found nearby? >
  
  Isn’t this in the beginning of Dante’s peak >
  
  I, too, enjoy mad libs. >
  
  Doesn't matter what you were called before, if you step off too close to those hotsprings your new name is Stew. Do not fuck around in nature, water gives no fucks what is boiling along with it. >
  
  Were the poems any good? 
  Ode to my foot. I threw you in a pool, and it was really cool. 😎 I watched you sink and I began to think. 🤔 I'm having second thoughts about cutting you off, and now I'm left with only a scoff.