comment: >
  
  You are correct but at the same time folks are using mental illness as an excuse.
context: Nowadays? Lol. It was ever thus. >
  
  Thus it ever was! >
  
  I can't judge whether this is unpopular or not -- mainly because it hasn't been discussed much as far as I've seen. Maybe there is less indulgence of mental illness because more people are recognizing that they might have one, or there is less empathy because social media has made more people unmitigated assholes.
  There's also a lot of people who wear their issues on their sleeve, who crave attention and want some kind of an exception -- and, I think that too much is made of the attention seekers. They aren't really harming anyone, and the people who gripe about the Kardashians all the time are worse than the fans in my book. WHY do you care? Meanwhile, there is a larger group of people who really are having challenges functioning -- perhaps because of more stress from not having a more "human" setting for interaction. We have over a million years of adaptation as a species to a world we can touch and in person communication. There needs to be a lot more study not just of social media -- but in general; what happens to people when they are not interacting physically?
  One basic study of twins where one was sitting and the other standing, showed about a 10 difference in life expectancy for the twin that stood. >
  
  People have very little empathy to begin with >
  
  The downside of culture without core beliefs is crazy town. >
  
  I really, really want to blame tumbler for this. 
  Somewhere in the 2000s people started to wear mental illnesses like accessories. Again and again they’d wave words around like ‘anxiety’ and ‘depression’ as if they had the golden ticket of excuses to be terrible people. Maybe they did have those illnesses but what people need to understand is that poor health, be it mental or physical, is an excuse but it is not always a justification. 
  If someone in a wheel chair turns down public hang outs because they hate trying to navigate new places in their chair, that is a justification. If someone with anxiety says no to a huge social gathering because the thought of so many people in one room makes them want to throw up, that’s a justification. 
  However, if that same person in the wheel chair throws a tantrum every time their partner goes on a walk or does something they can’t participate in - that is an excuse. If that same person with anxiety refuses to host, or let someone else host, a big birthday party of their SO’s dreams because they wouldn’t be able to enjoy it - that’s an excuse. 
  In the later cases, their feelings are valid but their expectation that the world must always cater to their needs even to the regular detriment of loved ones is not okay. It’s okay to feel frustrated, angry, bitter, jealous, or envious but it’s not okay to act on those feelings or make others absolve them. 
  Unfortunately, that’s a delicate balancing act. 
  Living with illness or disability, be it physical or mental, is hard. It is always going to be hard. I don’t live with anxiety and depression, I fight it every god damned day. And yeah, sometimes I slip up and my loved ones know that. But at no point should they revolve their entire lives around it. 
  Honestly, I hate sharing my mental health now because so many people use it as a justification to be jerks. It’s not. It never is and it never will be. >
  
  The issue I have is dealing with the self-diagnosed, it's not a fucking fad! Having depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, bipolar, or any other diagnosis can be absolutely crippling. >
  
  As someone who has suffered from crippling depression, and still deals with depressive episodes… I don’t mind people who self diagnose.
  Yes, some of them are idiots who don’t know what they’re talking about. 
  But many of them can’t afford therapy, or they have a good grasp of their mental illness, to the point it’s easy for them to self diagnose… 
  Unless someone isn’t obviously lying, I think it’s best to believe them when they say they have x mental illness. >
  
  Exactly like you don’t need to be a psychiatrist to figure out that say when your having a panic attack at once a week minimum that you might have an anxiety problem. >
  
  Empathy for mental illnesses is the highest it’s ever been. >
  
  and it's still not enough >
  
  Can't have an endless supply of empathy, especially if you're the type of person who doesn't need empathy from others. >
  
  Title is very  general, click-baity and you list very specific examples of romantic relationships.  and end with  some thing that no one actually thinks.  (people with mental illness  don't deserve empathy). >
  
  Mental illness shouldn't be used as an excuse, but sometimes I feel like people forget that sometimes it's not an excuse and people are at a place where they can not stop themselves from doing something, or do not know that it's a thing they shouldn't do. 
  If you need to leave someone because their issues are too much for you, that's fine, but so many people seem to just see mentally ill people as people who don't deserve care or relationships. It's always interesting when someone will go out of their way to help someone who isn't mentally ill but is against the idea of a mentally ill person getting help. >
  
  Sometimes I fell like other people just don't care. If i was missing both legs and was in a wheelchair you wouldn't ask me to do 3 laps around the basketball court for gym class but just bc my neurodivergence is not visible people seem less interestednin treating me like somebody with neurodivergency. We can't all function the same. >
  
  I think it’s cause people are tired of seeing people fake mental illnesses, so when someone actually has one they don’t feel and empathy or care about them. 
  This is coming from someone actually diagnosed, not self diagnosed. I completely understand why people have no empathy for certain ones cause it’s clear they are either faking it or doing for attention. Because I get annoyed by it too. 
  A ton of people are self diagnosing themselves with every mental Illness over nothing so it is completely understandable for people to either be annoyed or lack empathy cause sometimes those people aren’t suffering, but faking. I’ve seen it many times and it’s sad. >
  
  The amount of compassion people on the Internet have for mental health really seems to depend on what mental illnesses you're talking about. Most of the Redditors I've seen, who know what's good for them, will recommend to leave and never again contact narcissists, extreme bipolar people, or to a lesser extent psychopaths, but these last two generations seem to really advocate for more common mental health awareness like in regards to autism, depression, and anxiety. Granted, sort of like you said, the former case is normally because those people are jerks, 'basket cases', or actual domestic/spousal/child abusers. >
  
  Just because I can empathise with their plight, it's not really my responsibility to help or fix them. I may or may not love them enough to support their journey towards healing. I don't have the patience and "empathy" to tell them to stop using their illness as a crutch to not fix themselves and stay miserable. I am a firm believer a person can only change their condition when they make the effort to change themselves and to my experience, is an uphill battle and not easily overcome, let alone support by people around them. I still have my own baggages to deal with and it's also something not people would like to help me with and support. >
  
  mental illness can also feel like a very selfish thing. To live with the unpleasant symptoms and manifestations of a partner or family member's mental illness, only to be told that they have a diagnosis and now they are saying they will need you to work harder to help them recover feels a lot like getting beaten up by the town bully only to have them tell you that from now on, you have to try harder to tolerate being slapped in the face.
  It is going to take generations, not decades before people are able to understand what those suffering from mental illness are going through. And since there is inadequate access to mental health services, probably longer. >
  
  Well, we have person A. Person A struggles with anxiety disorder. That person is leaning on person B and person B is also seriously struggling with many actions of person A, that start to actively cause mental health related issues to person B. 
  Person A has a very shitty behaviour because of anxiety. Person b is actively affected by it. Just because person B understands the reason for person's A actions, it doesn't mean that he has to endure them, specially if person A becomes manipulative, toxic, stressful to a big extent, etc. 
  Everyone, and I mean it, everyone is struggling with many issues. But noone has the right to dictate someone else's lives because of said issues.
  Also, I am not sure about low empathy towards mental health. Mental health is being discussed more than ever in the entirety of human history >
  
  People use mental illness as a shield for bad behavior, it's completely fair to not empathize with that. >
  
  I agree. I had a friend in high school who had a mental illness (although she also faked/ exaggerated some things), and even though I empathized with her at first, she fucked me over way too many times while hiding behind her mental illness. She never apologized for anything, and at some point, my empathy changed into irritation. Like, there's only so much one can take. >
  
  The example lacks context because you are not the guy or the girl. And from the sound of it, you have never actually asked the girl for her side of the story, meaning, it is exceptionally one sided and biased. So, I do not agree.
  And, did you care about her mental well-being? Did you know she is likely becoming depressed because of your friend? I highly doubt it.
  Seriously though, don't talk the talk. If you honestly think there is be more to help your friend, you should move in with him to experience that first hand what is it like. Because you make it sounds like it is so easy and everyone should be able to do it. It is not easy at all. >
  
  People have empathy, but there's a difference between hearing someone's issues and becoming their sole source to trauma dump or vent to. If your mental illness is all you are ever going to talk about, people are going to lose interest in the subject and you as a person. Friends and family are not meant to be substitutes for therapy. >
  
  I just had to deal with this recently. I wanted to be a good friend to this person but it just turned into them telling me they want to die everyday and dodging every suggestion I made. It got old very fast, especially since they didn't have any plans of seeing a therapist >
  
  I don't know what you're talking about mental illness is celebrated now. >
  
  I remeber, 2 weeks ago, when we were writing a test in college (not really a test like in high school but similar) and the professor, a 70 yo man, has a habit of talking through the entire fucking test. 3 minutes of silence between each sentence. Other students can drown him out in the background i guess bc they never complain about it to him or tell him to shut up. 
  I however have adhd. I asked him nicely "can you please be quite, i have a disorder that prevents me from focusing if there are distracting noises in the background". He responded "your disorder is not my fault" and continued talking. >
  
  I understand. 
  I have an actual anxiety disorder.  Clinical, biological impairment.   
  People still tell me 'oh I have anxiety, too'.
  Like, 'oh, you also are constantly anxious when you have no reason to be?  You're calm when you shouldn't be?'
  'Huh?  Oh...no, I just don't like crowds.'
  That said, even I don't want to be with someone who can't tolerate my flaws. 
  It would be nice if more employers offered mental health days or more comprehensive mental health coverage, but I can't imagine anyone being forced to deal with such an issue when they don't want to.  Edit:  Well, I can imagine it, because...well, I didn't volunteer for this, but...you know what I mean. >
  
  Depends on if its legit or not. Many people tend to self-diagnose themselves and use it as an excuse to be shitty or for attention. In this current time mental health has never had more support. >
  
  "Metal illness" in it's factual meaning? I do have empathy for people struggling with that.
  But people that are too afraid to make a phone call to a restaurant because they have "anxiety" not so much. Or people that ghost many other people because of "mental health" excuses, not so much.
  People misuse the term "mental illness" way too often. >
  
  People don't understand what they haven't experienced. I've spent my entire life around bipolar people I cared about a great deal. I am a dramatically empathic person. When I went nuts, the first think I realized was how little I knew. I just had no fucking idea because I had not personally gone through it. People are people. >
  
  Agree with what has been said above, society is in general much more open to helping those with mental disorders, there are a ton of active campaigns trying to raise awareness of depression / anxiety / self harm etc. what people have no empathy for are the self diagnosed tiktok stars that use ‘anxiety’ and ‘neurodivergent’ as buzzwords to gain sympathy points. >
  
  You are correct but at the same time folks are using mental illness as an excuse. >
  
  If you have a mental illness and you know how it's affecting others negatively, but you do absolutely nothing about it, then I believe you absolutely deserve to be chastised/punished for that. Of course we are excluding mental illness where insight is completely lost, but that should be obvious. By definition, mental illness is defined by how one person's actions harm themselves and others. When you are treating mental illness, you are also treating those around the ill individual vicariously.
  Now, that doesn't mean that if you have mental illness, you are a bad person unworthy of love or employment. It's actually very admirable when people acknowledge they have a problem and are seeking help, and there is a lot of strength in that. But if you've been told that your depression or Bipolar or whatever makes you violent many times, and your partner leaves  you because you were violent again secondary to your illness (with you doing nothing to seek treatment), than you have no right to be mad.
  However, if your partner knew you had a mental illness you were working on prior to entering the relationship and they leave midway through because your condition somehow becomes unbearable, then that is a different story. >
  
  People give themselves fake illnesses >
  
  When you have people claiming to need their pet peacock go everywhere with them because of their mental illness, society tends to get less empathetic, and much more irritated >
  
  Well, in today's world, everyone is coming out with a diagnosis and it dilutes those who have a serious problem. Everyone talks about their new found mental health ussues like it is debilitating and needs special accomodations. So although people who are struggling with mental health issues need some empathy and kindness, it is hard to see who is actually suffering and who is trying to get a free pass in life right now. >
  
  It’s because ‘mental illness’ has been everybody’s go to excuse for shitty behavior in recent years.  And it’s not just the big ones like depression and autism anymore. People with things as minor as ADHD are suddenly acting like they are incapable of navigating society. 
  When the internet and media in general makes it seem like mental illness is waiting for you around every corner and people expect you to excuse every problem caused by a supposed mental illness, it kinda makes sense for people to get impatient and lose empathy. >
  
  ADHD is not minor >
  
  It’s not debilitating either. >
  
  if you have undiagnosed ADHD, absolutely it is devastating. Come do a day in an outpatient psych clinic and you will see. >
  
  Mental illness is painfully over diagnosed largely as an excuse to continue pricey treatment and medications. You can walk into a mental health clinic and say your depressed and they will do virtually nothing to actual determine the cause, instead they give you a diagnosis and a prescription. 
  That’s not to say that mental illness isn’t real and that there aren’t certain people who have disruptive chemical imbalances, but it is over diagnosed. 
  The human experience comes with a baseline level of anxiety. That’s not a mental illness, that just life. Most people suffering from depression don’t suffer from a chemical imbalance, they suffer from an unwillingness to acknowledge and correct unfavorable life circumstances. If your depressed and just happen to have a shit job, or a shitty relationship, you probably don’t have a mental illness, you have a need to get a new job and get the fuck out of the relationship you are in. 
  The problem is, these cut rate shrinks don’t want to evaluate or tell you that you need to make changes, they just label you with some mental shit and give you pills. When’s the last time they did a brain scan or some form of hormone spectrum test? Never. They aren’t checking you for any anomaly at all, they are just validating your feelings and medicating you, even if that’s not what you really need.
  This of course the gives you a “diagnosis” to carry around as an excuse for shitty behavior and allows you to place an undue burden on your loved ones to accommodate your “diagnosis”.  This unfortunately hurts those with actual mental illness because it makes it harder to take them seriously. 
  Sure, there are some people who do have these legitimate chemical imbalances. I have a close friend that’s bipolar and holy fuck his personality shifts when he’s manic, and I help in whatever ways I can. But not every single whiney turd on you’d Facebook friends list making a claim of anxiety or depression should be taken seriously. Most of them are just experiencing the human condition, and can’t cope with it. >
  
  There’s an increase in diagnosis because there’s an increase in awareness about mental illnesses and ability to access treatment. You see the same sort of increase in diagnosis in universal healthcare systems and they loose money giving you medication or treatment, so have no financial incentive (or any other incentive) to over diagnose or prescribe. >
  
  Not to mention, everything has been pretty insane this past while. Yes, it was worse through history, but now we know all of this terrible shit is happening as it happens. Kids feel powerless seeing it when they grow up. 
  I can't speak for others but I spent my entire childhood hearing that the planet's dying, that we'll never be able to buy a home or retire, that we'll all die of microplastics or cancer, the world's starving, that mental illness is OK as long as you don't show symptoms, etc.
  Who wouldn't be happy? /s lol.
  Yeah though, a lifetime of hearing that the world's going to shit and that you're powerless to stop ^miight just be part of why so many younger people are struggling now. They can't escape it the same way people could before social media became popular. Even if they stay offline themselves, all of their peers know and will talk about it.
  Also, there's usually only acceptance until they show symptoms. Kids are labeled a "bad student", then are left to fall through the cracks. It's insane to me to expect kids to know coping mechanisms that they've never been taught. It's messed up to expect them to deal with chemical imbalances as if they're adults, but without the medication. Leaving them to sink will just compound the problems for them when they reach adulthood. Yet, they still decided to do that with a lot of millennials and gen Z. Of course a lot of us are going to be a bit of a mess >
  
  Just posted something similar about how dehumanizing it can be to be mentally I’ll. >
  
  Yeah I definitely agree like sometimes people are going to have symptoms, if they didn’t they wouldn’t be mentally ill. Accountability for mentally ill people doesn’t mean not having any symptoms because they aren’t a choice, accountability means seeking treatment if possible, employing coping strategies to manage your condition as best as possible and dealing with the harm or upset your symptoms may have caused responsibly. >
  
  The problem is not with lack of of empathy but with the fact that there is a lack of funding and proper investment in the area of mental health in lots of countries.
  For example, in my country (UK) it's very difficult to get mental health support on the NHS unless the crisis is life threatening and you have expressed willingness to harm yourself or others. People can be on the waiting list for years and often counselling sessions are capped at around 6 - not super helpful if you have a multitude of issues to work through. 
  Why this matters is that receiving no support will cause the romantic partner to take on a carer type role in the relationship. It is completely possible to have a relationship with someone receiving treatment for PTSD, for example, even if it will be tough sometimes. However, if someone is struggling to receive treatment for their PTSD, that means that the romantic partner is left dealing with all fall out symptoms from such a serious illness, usually whilst also holding down a job and other responsibilities.
  Try to see the real enemy here as lack of funding and investment in healthcare rather than blaming individuals. Supporting someone receiving no treatment is not what a lot of people sign up for when entering a relationship and it affects their life hugely. >
  
  
  Of course it's your right to choose who you want to date and you don't necessarily need a reason to break up with someone
  
  Now you're getting it >
  
  Damn, how are y’all out here meeting all these people who fake mental illness?? How do y’all know? Do they tell you? Is this just people y’all are seeing on social media or something? Maybe I’m way less extroverted than I thought but I defo have not run into this plethora of self diagnosed attention seekers every one else seems to have lol >
  
  Dude, there was so much improvement in the last few decades. I know lots of nurses that work with older nurses that are now almost retired, and their stories of how people with mental illness were treated in hospitals back in the day are absolutely horrible. They just drugged them as much as possible and locked them. Nobody gave a shit when they were tied up to the bed all day. The main idea most people had, is that people with mental illness just had to be disciplined correctly (you don't want to know how, trust me) to get them back on the right track. STFU and be grateful that you didn't have to live 30-60 years ago, people with mental illness probably have it better now than ever before in history. >
  
  is not there is many cases where mentally ill people kills innocent peoples ? >
  
  People have always been selfish. What's new? >
  
  I think you’re just objectively wrong. If anything people have more empathy, or at least sympathy for mental illness than anytime I can remember. Back in like the 90’s mental illnesses were something you could publicly still make fun of, and not get any real backlash and people did it all the time. 
  Hell plenty of people didn’t even believe in it and just thought it was a bunch of bullshit that people just needed to “toughen up and deal with it”. People like that of course still exist, and they’re not going away anytime soon, but as time has gone on there has been a clear shift in the public that’s more sympathetic to mental illness in general. >
  
  I'm referring more to a shift in the past 5 or so years rather than decades >
  
  So you’re looking at a graph that has an overall upward trend and laser focusing one little perceived dip? You can do that if you like but it’s dishonest and it doesn’t change the general trend over time, making you’re title about “these days” just wrong. >
  
  My perception might be different to yours because I'm young >
  
  That could be true, but I’m also aware of times before I was alive when people were far less sympathetic to mental illness than today. In the 50’s for example, you’d see people who by and large thought psychiatry was just a scam or a joke. There was no such thing as mental illness, just people who needed to “toughen up”. I wasn’t alive in the 50’s but I’m still aware of those perceptions being prevalent. >
  
  Can we do what our ancestors did and solve homelessness with sanitariums? >
  
  It's how it is. Getting your head all screwed up has the unfortunate side affect if screwing with everyone around you too, sometimes.
  At least it's better than it was before this: back when basically everything about mental health was taboo. >
  
  If they have 10k upvotes that means 10k people on the sub disagree with it >
  
  It is better than when people with mental issues were locked inside homes and never allowed to leave. >
  
  Here's the thing. I suffer from mental illness, but I actively do something about it. I was even in a psychiatric until for 5 days. Yes only 5 days. What blew my mind was 1) the number of frequent flyers. It should not be a goal to be in and out a dozen times and 2) how many people said they were on this med or that med and how many they've tired.  These both are things that HELP you, but you have to actively work at it. You're not going to see a psychologist or take a pill and suddenly sunshine is blowing out your ass. You have to be compliant and keep working at it. If a doc gives you meds, or schedules therapy apts, and you don't take them or don't go, empathy is gone. >
  
  I actually think we have too much empathy towards mental illness, to the point where we excuse innappropriate/dangerous behavior because "oh well, they have a mental illness" ... So? We should suffer because of their inability to mentally regulate? Hell no... 
  Ive ran into so many destructive people, but Im the piece of shit when I cut them from my life because they are bipolar... Im sorry, I wont forgive poor behavior or tolerate bullshit because of mental illness...
  Edit: not to mention the people who use it as a scapegoat... "oh im sorry I yelled and lit your clothes on fire, I have bipolar, you should have just picked a place to eat".... WTF? >
  
  I’ll just add that people who are abusive or have anger issues often “quite literally can’t help it” either, but that still doesn’t require a relationship partner to tolerate their toxic or neurotic behavior. People need to work on themselves before being in a relationship if they’re mentally unwell. And I say that as someone with Bipolar Disorder who has sought a ton of help over several years and is in a healthy marriage. >
  
  I have depression due to horrid events I’ve experienced. When I asked for help in 2018, no one was taking me seriously. My school said “Life isn’t perfect.” I was denied psychiatry. A hospital offered me a therapist after begging. After 5 sessions, the urge to die was only increasing. I asked when can I start seeing a specialist for meds. She told me I’m not depressed so that’s unnecessary. I went straight to the ER and tried killing myself in the lobby. Call it a cry for attention but I wanted help so badly and I was 100% ready to kms if I went home. Even in the psych ward, they yelled at me for crying. There was absolutely no compassion.
  I asked for mental help just this year again and wtf. My school offered me services. I was given a psychiatrist right away. Before I even mentioned my history, my therapist recognized right away I have depression. I was sent to the hospital and everyone was so nice to me, and they said they take their sad patients very seriously >
  
  Bullshit.
  I'm in my 40s and never in my life up to now have I seen more awareness of and acceptance for mental illness. No longer is it shameful to mention being on the spectrum, or to say that someone struggles with anxiety or depression.
  You're absolutely nuts if you think that things "nowadays" are anything other than far better than they've ever been before. >
  
  A have no empathy left for anyone in the world >
  
  That area is oversaturated with people who claim to have trauma for stubbing their toe >
  
  I have a lot empathy for them and i notice that we are not doing enough for them. >
  
  While I agree with some of this, there are some people who use their list of self diagnosed problems as an excuse for every skeleton in their closet.  I had a friend like this.  Lots of disorders and issues, he’s been in a lot of bad places but luckily, he’s doing a lot better now.  I did my best to hold my tongue when he did something shitty to me, but I don’t think add or adhd is an ok excuse for some of the things he did.  For example, he started making this joke concerning my ex (extremely rough breakup). I told him the first time that it really was insensitive and hurt my feelings, keep in mind this was directly after the breakup.  For anyone who is wondering “I’m sorry, it won’t happen again” is an apology “I’m sorry, it’s just my insert random disorder” is a pathetic excuse for an apology.  Not to mention this “joke” went on for months.  I’m not as close with this person anymore, they do things like this all the time and I’ve decided that I’m not the one to deal with him anymore. >
  
  Take this how you will. 
  Ive had an ex with severe depression, past abuse, anxiety, Bipolar . She was an otherwise fantastic girl I adores but her mental illness always reared its head. She left me but I learned that its not easy at all and it took a lot out of me because of how I like to give and receive love in ways she was totally unable to. Moving forward this isnt something I want to endure. 
  I feel the same way about physical illness. Was weary about dating a fantastic girl, but she had some mental and physical issues. She had issues around her knees and joints and had difficulty walking distances. I love to hike, i love to walk, I’m from NYC , i walk fast and past slow walkers. I enjoy physical activity. I stopped pursuing her for this among many other reasons. 
  To me its a “me issue”, I seek a certain lifestyle or flexibility and ease of mind. Its selfish of me yes but doesnt make me bad.
  I like to think that in the end they will find someone better suited or more patient for them. >
  
  Sometimes people don't have the emotional tools to reassure and care for these kinds of partners. Neither side is to blame here. I tried to love someone with depression and they ended up affecting my own mental health. 
  If your mental illnesses are that severe you need to seek a therapist who is literally trained to deal with it. Everyday people aren't therapists. It's especially hard to care for someone who's mentally ill when they don't want to help themselves but want you to continue to support them
  It gets exhausting after a while >
  
  Personally.
  I do not believe in emotions. They do not exist, it's just your bitch ass mindset. The best way to get over it is to just ignore it and continue. 
  I see a lot of people cry and take the day off because someone in their family die. The best way to get over it is to go to work or go out. Doing something is a lot better then doing nothing. Doing nothing is leaving you alone forcing you to think about it. If your doing something you'd get over it a lot quicker.
  That's why I don't feel empathy for those. >
  
  Sweet lord, I hope you get some help before entering into any kind of relationship any time soon. The sheer lack of ability to see beyond that what works for you may not work for others is alarming. People cope differently, and sometimes just power working through something to avoid feeling isn’t what we want to do. Feeling things is important. Human experience and whatnot. >
  
  Relationships = comfort = weakness
  Feelings dont exist. Its your mind. >
  
  Come one, two people put in the anxiety or depression boxes can have different symptoms and different causes. If it's hard to relate even to someone in your category how tf can you expect empathy from some random normies. 
  Yes, you are right. >
  
  Was your friend diagnosed with depression? >
  
  Would say there is more sympathy for functioning nuerodivergent people.
  But mentally ill enough to be at all disruptive or criminal, nope.
  Mental hospitals get pretty fucked up and you wanna see a shitshow put a small town cop in the same room as someone with moderate or above mental illness. >
  
  Nowadays? Lol. It was ever thus. >
  
  Thus it ever was! >
  
  I can't judge whether this is unpopular or not -- mainly because it hasn't been discussed much as far as I've seen. Maybe there is less indulgence of mental illness because more people are recognizing that they might have one, or there is less empathy because social media has made more people unmitigated assholes.
  There's also a lot of people who wear their issues on their sleeve, who crave attention and want some kind of an exception -- and, I think that too much is made of the attention seekers. They aren't really harming anyone, and the people who gripe about the Kardashians all the time are worse than the fans in my book. WHY do you care? Meanwhile, there is a larger group of people who really are having challenges functioning -- perhaps because of more stress from not having a more "human" setting for interaction. We have over a million years of adaptation as a species to a world we can touch and in person communication. There needs to be a lot more study not just of social media -- but in general; what happens to people when they are not interacting physically?
  One basic study of twins where one was sitting and the other standing, showed about a 10 difference in life expectancy for the twin that stood. >
  
  People have very little empathy to begin with >
  
  The downside of culture without core beliefs is crazy town. >
  
  I really, really want to blame tumbler for this. 
  Somewhere in the 2000s people started to wear mental illnesses like accessories. Again and again they’d wave words around like ‘anxiety’ and ‘depression’ as if they had the golden ticket of excuses to be terrible people. Maybe they did have those illnesses but what people need to understand is that poor health, be it mental or physical, is an excuse but it is not always a justification. 
  If someone in a wheel chair turns down public hang outs because they hate trying to navigate new places in their chair, that is a justification. If someone with anxiety says no to a huge social gathering because the thought of so many people in one room makes them want to throw up, that’s a justification. 
  However, if that same person in the wheel chair throws a tantrum every time their partner goes on a walk or does something they can’t participate in - that is an excuse. If that same person with anxiety refuses to host, or let someone else host, a big birthday party of their SO’s dreams because they wouldn’t be able to enjoy it - that’s an excuse. 
  In the later cases, their feelings are valid but their expectation that the world must always cater to their needs even to the regular detriment of loved ones is not okay. It’s okay to feel frustrated, angry, bitter, jealous, or envious but it’s not okay to act on those feelings or make others absolve them. 
  Unfortunately, that’s a delicate balancing act. 
  Living with illness or disability, be it physical or mental, is hard. It is always going to be hard. I don’t live with anxiety and depression, I fight it every god damned day. And yeah, sometimes I slip up and my loved ones know that. But at no point should they revolve their entire lives around it. 
  Honestly, I hate sharing my mental health now because so many people use it as a justification to be jerks. It’s not. It never is and it never will be. >
  
  The issue I have is dealing with the self-diagnosed, it's not a fucking fad! Having depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, bipolar, or any other diagnosis can be absolutely crippling. >
  
  As someone who has suffered from crippling depression, and still deals with depressive episodes… I don’t mind people who self diagnose.
  Yes, some of them are idiots who don’t know what they’re talking about. 
  But many of them can’t afford therapy, or they have a good grasp of their mental illness, to the point it’s easy for them to self diagnose… 
  Unless someone isn’t obviously lying, I think it’s best to believe them when they say they have x mental illness. >
  
  Exactly like you don’t need to be a psychiatrist to figure out that say when your having a panic attack at once a week minimum that you might have an anxiety problem. >
  
  Empathy for mental illnesses is the highest it’s ever been. >
  
  and it's still not enough >
  
  Can't have an endless supply of empathy, especially if you're the type of person who doesn't need empathy from others. >
  
  Title is very  general, click-baity and you list very specific examples of romantic relationships.  and end with  some thing that no one actually thinks.  (people with mental illness  don't deserve empathy). >
  
  Mental illness shouldn't be used as an excuse, but sometimes I feel like people forget that sometimes it's not an excuse and people are at a place where they can not stop themselves from doing something, or do not know that it's a thing they shouldn't do. 
  If you need to leave someone because their issues are too much for you, that's fine, but so many people seem to just see mentally ill people as people who don't deserve care or relationships. It's always interesting when someone will go out of their way to help someone who isn't mentally ill but is against the idea of a mentally ill person getting help. >
  
  Sometimes I fell like other people just don't care. If i was missing both legs and was in a wheelchair you wouldn't ask me to do 3 laps around the basketball court for gym class but just bc my neurodivergence is not visible people seem less interestednin treating me like somebody with neurodivergency. We can't all function the same. >
  
  I think it’s cause people are tired of seeing people fake mental illnesses, so when someone actually has one they don’t feel and empathy or care about them. 
  This is coming from someone actually diagnosed, not self diagnosed. I completely understand why people have no empathy for certain ones cause it’s clear they are either faking it or doing for attention. Because I get annoyed by it too. 
  A ton of people are self diagnosing themselves with every mental Illness over nothing so it is completely understandable for people to either be annoyed or lack empathy cause sometimes those people aren’t suffering, but faking. I’ve seen it many times and it’s sad. >
  
  The amount of compassion people on the Internet have for mental health really seems to depend on what mental illnesses you're talking about. Most of the Redditors I've seen, who know what's good for them, will recommend to leave and never again contact narcissists, extreme bipolar people, or to a lesser extent psychopaths, but these last two generations seem to really advocate for more common mental health awareness like in regards to autism, depression, and anxiety. Granted, sort of like you said, the former case is normally because those people are jerks, 'basket cases', or actual domestic/spousal/child abusers. >
  
  Just because I can empathise with their plight, it's not really my responsibility to help or fix them. I may or may not love them enough to support their journey towards healing. I don't have the patience and "empathy" to tell them to stop using their illness as a crutch to not fix themselves and stay miserable. I am a firm believer a person can only change their condition when they make the effort to change themselves and to my experience, is an uphill battle and not easily overcome, let alone support by people around them. I still have my own baggages to deal with and it's also something not people would like to help me with and support. >
  
  mental illness can also feel like a very selfish thing. To live with the unpleasant symptoms and manifestations of a partner or family member's mental illness, only to be told that they have a diagnosis and now they are saying they will need you to work harder to help them recover feels a lot like getting beaten up by the town bully only to have them tell you that from now on, you have to try harder to tolerate being slapped in the face.
  It is going to take generations, not decades before people are able to understand what those suffering from mental illness are going through. And since there is inadequate access to mental health services, probably longer. >
  
  Well, we have person A. Person A struggles with anxiety disorder. That person is leaning on person B and person B is also seriously struggling with many actions of person A, that start to actively cause mental health related issues to person B. 
  Person A has a very shitty behaviour because of anxiety. Person b is actively affected by it. Just because person B understands the reason for person's A actions, it doesn't mean that he has to endure them, specially if person A becomes manipulative, toxic, stressful to a big extent, etc. 
  Everyone, and I mean it, everyone is struggling with many issues. But noone has the right to dictate someone else's lives because of said issues.
  Also, I am not sure about low empathy towards mental health. Mental health is being discussed more than ever in the entirety of human history >
  
  People use mental illness as a shield for bad behavior, it's completely fair to not empathize with that. >
  
  I agree. I had a friend in high school who had a mental illness (although she also faked/ exaggerated some things), and even though I empathized with her at first, she fucked me over way too many times while hiding behind her mental illness. She never apologized for anything, and at some point, my empathy changed into irritation. Like, there's only so much one can take. >
  
  The example lacks context because you are not the guy or the girl. And from the sound of it, you have never actually asked the girl for her side of the story, meaning, it is exceptionally one sided and biased. So, I do not agree.
  And, did you care about her mental well-being? Did you know she is likely becoming depressed because of your friend? I highly doubt it.
  Seriously though, don't talk the talk. If you honestly think there is be more to help your friend, you should move in with him to experience that first hand what is it like. Because you make it sounds like it is so easy and everyone should be able to do it. It is not easy at all. >
  
  People have empathy, but there's a difference between hearing someone's issues and becoming their sole source to trauma dump or vent to. If your mental illness is all you are ever going to talk about, people are going to lose interest in the subject and you as a person. Friends and family are not meant to be substitutes for therapy. >
  
  I just had to deal with this recently. I wanted to be a good friend to this person but it just turned into them telling me they want to die everyday and dodging every suggestion I made. It got old very fast, especially since they didn't have any plans of seeing a therapist >
  
  I don't know what you're talking about mental illness is celebrated now. >
  
  I remeber, 2 weeks ago, when we were writing a test in college (not really a test like in high school but similar) and the professor, a 70 yo man, has a habit of talking through the entire fucking test. 3 minutes of silence between each sentence. Other students can drown him out in the background i guess bc they never complain about it to him or tell him to shut up. 
  I however have adhd. I asked him nicely "can you please be quite, i have a disorder that prevents me from focusing if there are distracting noises in the background". He responded "your disorder is not my fault" and continued talking. >
  
  I understand. 
  I have an actual anxiety disorder.  Clinical, biological impairment.   
  People still tell me 'oh I have anxiety, too'.
  Like, 'oh, you also are constantly anxious when you have no reason to be?  You're calm when you shouldn't be?'
  'Huh?  Oh...no, I just don't like crowds.'
  That said, even I don't want to be with someone who can't tolerate my flaws. 
  It would be nice if more employers offered mental health days or more comprehensive mental health coverage, but I can't imagine anyone being forced to deal with such an issue when they don't want to.  Edit:  Well, I can imagine it, because...well, I didn't volunteer for this, but...you know what I mean. >
  
  Depends on if its legit or not. Many people tend to self-diagnose themselves and use it as an excuse to be shitty or for attention. In this current time mental health has never had more support. >
  
  "Metal illness" in it's factual meaning? I do have empathy for people struggling with that.
  But people that are too afraid to make a phone call to a restaurant because they have "anxiety" not so much. Or people that ghost many other people because of "mental health" excuses, not so much.
  People misuse the term "mental illness" way too often. >
  
  People don't understand what they haven't experienced. I've spent my entire life around bipolar people I cared about a great deal. I am a dramatically empathic person. When I went nuts, the first think I realized was how little I knew. I just had no fucking idea because I had not personally gone through it. People are people. >
  
  Agree with what has been said above, society is in general much more open to helping those with mental disorders, there are a ton of active campaigns trying to raise awareness of depression / anxiety / self harm etc. what people have no empathy for are the self diagnosed tiktok stars that use ‘anxiety’ and ‘neurodivergent’ as buzzwords to gain sympathy points.