comment: >
  
  Alternatively you can find new hobbies/friends. Your perception of the world is through your lived experiences which pertain to alcohol in some way.
context: Maybe hang out with better people who aren’t so judgy and insecure >
  
  I prefer "Maybe hang out with people that don't suck". >
  
  It's funny I was just saying this to my friend the other day. My husband and I went on a trip to stowe vermont and there was a restaurant with a whole page of mocktails and being pregnant it was great. Despite the username (lol) I am not an avid drinker and used to collect whiskeys and scotches. Now, I'm trying more bougie sodas and making my own little mocktails at home. I'm hopeful that more pubs and places will open with things aside from drinking as the draw like video game bars, board game cafes, pool halls etc. since sober curious and sobriety is becoming more common in younger people. >
  
  My husband and I are headed to Stowe this Tuesday. Good to know! >
  
  Doc Ponds was the name of the place we went and there was lots of mocktails if you find yourself curious >
  
  Great, thank you! We'll have to try it out. >
  
  We had a dry bar in my area and it closed after 5 months due to low business. Pretty sad. >
  
  As a non drinker now, I'll spend $12 on a mocktail but I'm not going to buy 3 or 4 like I would when I was drinking. Same with NA beer. I'll have 1 or 2 at a concert but I'm not going to have 5 or 6 like I would when going out before. You just can't do the volume of sales like with regular bars so you better have some other revenue stream if you're a dry bar. >
  
  Just use my response, problem solved. >
  
  Nice! Might actually use that. >
  
  Question: How old are you and what part of the world are you in? Individual and cultural attitudes towards alcohol can vary greatly by area and probably by age. I'm in my 30s in the northeastern US, and no one ever gives me shit or weird looks if I don't want to drink. >
  
  Mid 30s Norway >
  
  I only drink sometimes and I’ve never heard people say any of that to me when I’m not drinking. Conversations go like this “what drink can I get for you? Beer? Cocktail? Wine?” “No thanks do you have anything nonalcoholic” “sure! Soda? Mocktail? Iced tea?” “I’d love an iced tea thanks!”
  Whenever I have parties I have 6 different pitchers with spouts and 3 are blue and 3 are green and the blue are labeled alcohol and green are labeled non alcoholic (I make my own cocktails/mocktails) and then I have a cooler of beer and wine and a cooler of soda and tea. 
  Maybe get different friends? If people are rude about this they aren’t worth hanging out with. >
  
  Society is so obsessed with alcohol it's not funny. >
  
  I'd hardly say obsessed its just something fun to do sometimes. >
  
  I live in the uk and we are definitely obsessed.  A lot of people I know live for their next drink. >
  
  Ahhh, I see. I guess it would all depend on what you consider excessive as well. Like 1 drink a week probably isn't bad but yeah if you're drinking 2 or 3 nights out of the week that's probably not the best. >
  
  Lol you have no concept for what actual drinking is… >
  
  And how exactly did you divine this from two comments that have no mention of my drinking habits? >
  
  Your first reply shows you are oblivious to how integrated alcohol use is into social norms/customs. 
  The use of “probably” and “maybe” in your follow up reply indicates you don’t have a good sense for what a real drinking problem looks like. 
  I very well could be wrong. But language use can be an indicator of underlying perceptions. >
  
  Dad was an alcoholic druggy who left when I was a kid so I know what alcohol problems look like. For some people drinking any alcohol (one a week, can lead to alcoholism, for some it can be fine thus probably) and drinking two or three nights out of the week absolutely can be a drinking problem. If you are having 8 shots a night 3 times a week at parties that absolutely is unhealthy and is a problem
  ​
  I think you're just looking too far into things. >
  
  Fair enough. And good points made. I guess your comment caught my eye bc I used to be a very heavy drinker and now a non-drinker. 
  One thing I feel like I can’t un-see anymore is just how prevalent drinking is in many cultures (American being the one I live in). 
  It’s just always there, being suggested. 
  I can’t drive 2 miles in most places around me (metro-Boston) w out crossing by at least as many liquor stores. Often times more. 
  Restaurants highly promote its consumption. 
  Sports and concerts heavily sponsored by it. 
  A constant in television/movies for characters to have something in their hand/make their character seem cool. 
  Now being served at your local movie theatre…
  It just goes on… >
  
  If social drinking really does decline in younger generations, more sober social activities will spring up. 
  Personally, I just bring some non alcoholic beer to the party and drink those. Or…I bring vodka and soda for the party. Then…just pour soda in a glass and sip on that. As long as you have a drink in your hand, people have no reason to ask you about it. >
  
  I feel like this is very localized. I often decline to drink and no-one I know ever bats an eye. >
  
  I'm not sure how old you are, but those questions drop off as you get into your 30's and 40's. >
  
  I get this, I don’t drink (for other and more sinister reasons than you) but I found that when I order a mocktail or a water - I get questions - mostly from the bartender which is terrible IMO. Resorted to ordering an apple juice in a short glass to “appear” I’m drinking scotch - which absolutely sucks. >
  
  There's big money to be made in addictive substances, it doesn't matter what the consequences are. This is a profit driven nation. 
  A lot of people want to change that but so far no luck. >
  
  Sure. There's big money in it. But why be so hostile to those who don't drink? Because they're not giving you money? If you were a company that made that stuff, I'd understand, but why would regular people stigmatize non-drinkers? >
  
  Because they're conditioned by advertising and bar culture, which again, exist for profit, not for the benefit of their target consumers. >
  
  Is advertising and bar culture actually telling them to shun non-drinkers? As far as I know, they normally just tell them "Drink our product!", not "Shame the non-drinkers!" >
  
  Not explicitly, but the message is there. Ads and media associate fun and youth with alcohol, and as a result, people who don't drink, especially young people, are seen as less social or unusual.
  It's not just ads that contribute to that culture, it's music and television and film. >
  
  Unusual, sure, but as far as I know, not explicitly ordering drinkers to shame the sober.  
  Hell, this makes it worse, as the shaming folk are being assholes of their own volition. But why? >
  
  As Earthling said, they've been conditioned to believe that drinking is not only normal, but expected. They don't need to be explicitly told anything, they've associated fun with alcohol, and thus can't fathom why someone wouldn't drink. >
  
  Drinking is a quick and easy way to deal with a sleuth of problems that just about everyone deals with including stress, anxiety, and physical pain, so this would never happen. >
  
  Alcohol has never numbed anyone of those things for me. >
  
  It does for many other people though, especially when consumed in large quantities. >
  
  The thing is, alcohol being addictive, you can make much more money out of it.
  I work at a bar, the difference between a non-drinker and a drinker is the non-drinker will have one unit or two and make me about 7 euros. The drinker can easily have 7-8 units and spend the whole night there, as well as come back every night.
  The customers who really pay my salary are the high functioning alcoholics who basically live at the bar. >
  
  I'm not much of a drinker and never experienced any of those comments. But some of those things are blatantly stupid so why care or bother giving them the attention. >
  
  None of my friends had anything bad to say when I quit drinking. You need a better group of friends. If they're that upset you won't drink, they're probably having drinking problems themselves and are scared to see you stop so easily, when they know that they can't. >
  
  The saying I know is "you can't trust anyone that can't trust themselves with a drink." >
  
  That makes sense. But i have also heard that people who don't drink when others are are memorizing what others say while drunk to screw them over or something. >
  
  I think that's a somewhat rational concern in some areas of business, but I've personally never met anyone like that. >
  
  I am 3 years sober, and if people ask me a question like that I respond with something like "I'm a recovering meth whore. Drinking would lead me to slip back to that lifestyle"
  Most people though are curious and I explain that I'm a recovering addict. And that's because I'm comfortable with that part of myself.
  But drunk people are very annoying to me. I usually leave once people start getting sloppy. >
  
  I’ve always had the feeling that people that don’t drink don’t trust themselves to not lose control. I’ve always been able to hold my liquor to an insane degree since I was young, but some people go apeshit when they drink. That’s why Trump doesn’t drink. He probably becomes a fucking monster you’d have to call the cops on. >
  
  One of the many things that infuriated me during the Trump admin was people pointing out he didn't drink and didn't have a pet. Like, can you please focus on the things the dude actually does wrong? Don't associate sobriety and not liking pets with that asshole, thank you. I don't want people to look at me and think of Trump. >
  
  I don't drink alcohol either.  I used to but I gave it up because it just didn't agree with me anymore and I had two people in my life who were raging alcoholics.  It's really not much of an issue now that I'm a bit older.  But previously I would just tell people it was because of medication. >
  
  Cater to? Why? >
  
  Well we are as a society trying to encourage people to lead healthier lifestyles, if nothing else to ease the burden in our collapsing healthcare systems. If we enoucrage people eating healthy and exercising, why not sobriety? >
  
  That's not catering to them. That's encouraging it but no need to cater to them. >
  
  I have not had a drink in 37 years, and very few people ask me why.  The answer that works best and shuts the line of questioning off is:
  "Whenever I drink, I break out in handcuffs." People just don't seem to want to expand on that, especially with someone who gets put in handcuffs whenever they drink.  
  It's a little sarcastic but carries a lot of truth. >
  
  Just hold a drink and pretend to take sips >
  
  You get weird comments because “I don’t like it” literally doesn’t make sense.
  In a good drink, you either can’t taste the liquor or it pairs so well that it tastes good.  And there are literally thousands upon thousands of ways to mix soda or juice or whatever to make a good tasting drink.
  Saying “I don’t like it” is essentially saying “I’m assuming every taste ever is bad.  I hate all potential flavours.”
  If you don’t like the effect it has on you, that’s a whole other thing.  If you don’t like the cost, that makes sense.  If you don’t like the calories, I’m there with you.  But “I don’t like it” literally doesn’t make sense as an answer.
  Just say you don’t drink, leave it at that, and let folks assume whatever. >
  
  Usually whenever people note I'm not drinking the only option is beer and i hate beer. I do enjoy wine VERY rarely.