comment: >
  
  Well, I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus.
context: "We didn't get any matches so it seems like Santa is a man with no criminal record. And it seems like Santa uses humans instead of reindeer for his sled." >
  
  No criminal record? Santa Claus, AkA Kris Kringle, AKA Father Christmas, AKA Saint Nick, AKA Pere Noel has over 200 BILLION accounts of break and entering with millions more charges for minor thefts (Usually baked good in the homes he invades).  He's so dangerous that NORAD dedicates significant time to track his every movement. >
  
  Miss, I don’t know how to tell you this…YOUR FATHER IS SANTA CLAUS! >
  
  “Oh my god… my mom had an AFFAIR with Santa Claus?! How will I tell dad?”