>
Okay then we’ll get wet for your convenience >

Just dodge from tall person to tall person. Problem solved. 
/a >

Exactly how high are you that you sat and logically made this argument 🤣 >

if I had to guess, above 5'6 >

You’re right, this is totally unfair. What should happen instead is every short person should be gifted a taller person as a useful buddy. The useful buddy will hold the umbrella for the shorter person and do everything the short person wishes. Great idea OP >

They could also use them in stores to reach those high shelves.  Multipurpose Tall folk. >

Tall people should be prohibited from passing gas in public spaces while standing. 
This is a public health issue, where fecal matter is being spread in the NHOA (Normal human operating altitude). Pink eye, e-coli and other forms of flatulence violence disturb the public peace of God's chosen.
Enforcement will come by way of integrating AI, thermal and squirt gun technologies. >

I don’t even have a picture that can show my reaction. >


This? >

​ > >

License to not get wet in the rain, that's brilliant. >

Seems promising. I would consult with High Lord Randy Newman before making any significant changes, though. >

This is how I keep the talls out of my sphere of personal space >

I'm 6'3" and I always take the umbrella if I'm walking with some one who's using one otherwise I'm gonna lose an eye >

Well, considering 5'6" is actually the average male height, and 5'2" the average female height, then it's silly to consider people under 5'6" as short. Rather, anyone over 5'6" are tall. And especially if you're grouping men and women together (not to mention children), then people over 5'6" are quite the minority.  So if special rules have to be made then it should pertain to tall people. A better solution would be everyone over 5'6" should have to take a mandatory defensive umbrella dodging course. >

wait 5.6 is average height?
I always thought it was 6 >

It’s like 5 9 for males and 5 5 for women in Canada and America don’t know where he got his numbers. Maybe that was true 50 years ago
Edit: actually I’m assuming he took the worlds average height which would include people who didn’t grow because of malnourishment and poor living conditions. >

Ideally I'd have used the stats for everywhere in the world where umbrella use is prevalent. But that's not readily accessible. Figured global averages makes more sense than just North America though. >

Yeah lol that would be a pretty obscure statistic though thinking about it, it would be pretty damn interesting to see. >

This is hilarious. 
Good job >

5'6 is average height for man >

Sireusly?
Isn't it 6 >

I've always thought they needed to require/issue pedestrian licenses. I could see where umbrella use would be on the test! >

Only if all tall people are forced to have an umbrella with them and have to invite short people under their umbrella whenever it's raining. >

Not an unpopular opinion, just a dumb one.  But to be fair, I support your idea so long as you agree that anyone over 5'9" is required to carry an umbrella to shield those shorter than them from the rain. >

Another lesson in something not being anywhere near as funny as you first thought. >

You are funny!! I generally close my umbrella when around people as to not inconvenience them. But for you? I'll go order the umbrella that that this icon on it for you: 🖕
The government won't make anyone test or have a license for an umbrella. That's so ignorant to even entertain the idea. 
And you saying you are 'flexable' on this is laughable. You obviously don't like short people. Just say it. Just because God (or whomever or whatever) didn't bless us to be freakishly tall... doesn't make us short people any less valuable. >

Why not make taller umbrellas? >

This is honestly the most illogical and egotistical opinion I've seen 
Thank you reading this was hilarious 
In what world does this make any sense 
Making others not use a simple object like an umbrella so you don't get slightly inconvenienced? And a license?
For a umbrella???
no one can't take this sireusly it's just to dumb >

*laughingggggg* I challenge you, Tall Person! 
*opens umbrella at 5'2" with faux menacing ninja swipes at your kneecaps* >

I'll stop using an umbrella when everyone over 5'6" stops attending concerts, sporting events and the theater. >

Counter-proposal. Tall people are not allowed in public when it rains. In this way, the existential threat of short people with umbrellas will be reduced.
As you say, the exact cut-off of "tall" is negotiable.
And in addition, tall people can be licensed (after education and testing) in the art and skill of "watching where you are going and not walking into umbrellas at face level", and upon receiving their license, may resume outings during rainy weather. >

The trick is to be tall enough that the umbrella doesn't reach eye level. >

Tall and fat people shouldn't be allowed to airplanes then?! I mean, they make my trip less comfortable since they take a lot of space. >

License to umbrella hahahahahha >

First dating now this!