>

"I'm sorry dude I freaked out cos I don't know how to tell you. I'm your friend though, so it's the right thing to do. I'm sorry, but...
Voldemort fucked your dad."
I used to have a friend like this. He’d be like, “Dude, you’ll never figure it out! It’s the guy you’d least expect!” Thanks bro. >

"So you think Luke Skywalker's father was killed by Darth Vader. But oh man, you will not believe the twist! I don't want to spoil it for you, but let's just say Vader knows Anakin Skywalker very well hehehe."
"Oh great, thanks for not ruining the surprise, bro." >

"Voldemort is definitely not his dad!"