>

hold up this looks kinda familiar
This is a friendly reminder to read our rules.
Remember, /r/Showerthoughts is for showerthoughts, not "thoughts had in the shower!"
(For an explanation of what a "showerthought" is, please read this page.)
Rule-breaking posts may result in bans. >

He started out as a dad, and became more and more human in the last forty-three years. >

I can’t remember anything from my childhood, other than myself getting older. >

One day you walk in to see them and realize that they're no longer just older than you.
They're old, and time is flying. >

That really hit me hard, next time I see my mom I’m telling her how much I appreciate everything she’s done! 
Sometimes because of the daily grind I forget to tell the ones I love how much they really matter to me. >

My parents never grew.  They devolved.
We were once a successful, happy family with a business and plenty of money to be comfortable.  Then my mom started being a cunt about the way my dad was running the business, cheated on him, and left.  Dad drank the business away and mom became an insufferable narcissist that I don't talk to anymore. >

Yeah, unless your going to keep pumping babies into a women, they will always get bored at home if your ultra focused on your business and basically show up to sleep, eventually your partner will feel empty and lonely. Unless its a nice family business like a restaurant, farm, etc. Owning your own business is getting to decide what 80 hours a week you want to work. Lmao >

How business works by someone who doesn't own a business, see inside magazine for marriage counselling and more! >

Looking back on my childhood, it’s insane for me to think about my parents having two kids right out of high school.. I’m 25 and dove into parenthood with my fiancée, who has a 7 year old (4 when we started seeing each other). I have learned and grown so much in the last 3 years.
We also have an 11 m/o together, and nothing could’ve prepare me for taking care of a baby, but again, I’ve learned and grown, and I wouldn’t have it any other way now. Being a dad is cool >

I am 40 and it is still shocking. I will be broken when my dad dies:/ >

I just see negative comments about people's parents. I saw my parents evolve to more compassionate people, really giving a lot for the people around them, that are in need. I can only hope to be so strong, compassionate and driven when i am their age. >

Yeah, i think i noticed there's two types of old old man, when i was REALLY little (we're talking 80): grumpy, crotchety, hates kids AND full of youthful joy, wants to inspire little kid 
"The more you think, the smarter you are" -some random guy i just met and never saw again >

I remember the one and only time my mom got drunk in front of me. I was like 14 and she got dropped off and couldn’t make it up the stairs on her own. She was younger that night than I am now and I’m exponentially further along in my life than she was then. Thinking I have my shit together better than either of my parents did until they were in their 50s is odd but also a little comforting. >

My son turned 13 yesterday. When he was born I was 21, full of anger, confusion and a shit load of anxiety, I was stupid and selfish for years. I couldn’t keep a job to save my life. I did not provide a good stable life for the first 4 years of his and his mothers life. We always had a place to live, and food to eat, but many times it was because of the kindness of friends and family. 
These are my biggest sins in life and I’m still making up for them today. What keeps me up at night is knowing I used to hurt people so bad by doing what I wanted, when I wanted, saying mean things so that I could control my environment and people. 
As I got older and more and more bad patterns kept presenting themselves, I started to realize. “Oh shit, it’s not my circumstances that suck, it’s how I’m reacting, and responding to them.” I was choosing to victimize myself. I’ve done a lot of growing the past 9 years, and I’ve started to look back on my childhood now, trying to fix the mistakes my parents made, as far as how I interact with the world. In that reflection I’ve learned more about my parents, and it’s helped me a lot in forgiving them, and in turn myself for what I had conceived about them and myself. 
Your parents might suck, you might THINK they suck. But the more shit I face in life the more I see how they might have ended up doing the things they did or being the people they were. They definitely needed to be growing as people more, but some things happen that you don’t even notice as a kid. My parents lost a baby, before I was born. These are things you don’t fully comprehend until adulthood. My mother was physically and sexually abused as a kid. My dad had a physically abusive dad(not as uncommon for his day and age, and he doesn’t see it that way, but I’ve heard enough stories). 
Empathy has been the key to growth for me.
Edit; I can still be a piece of shit sometimes. The difference is now I’m aware of it, and aware of why I’m doing it. I can hold a job now, I pay for all the expenses, I don’t LOVE work as far as it being my “dream” job, but I honestly enjoy what I do and have some good friends at work. I am way less prone to anger nowadays, and if I do get stressed and angry I always apologize for my actions and explain that I was being mean, and nothing anyone did was wrong and that I was wrong for reacting with anger. 
life is way better than it used to be. I hope one day my son sees that I’ve grown. >

I was nodding my head the whole way through that. Man i wish i had my shit together earlier in life, it took a life threatening situation for me to finally turn things around, glad i did though. >

I’m glad you did too, the world needs more people being their best. I recently had a son(2 years ago) with the same lady(my wife). He was born with cerebral palsy. It’s been a whole new test that I never expected, so I’m glad I started working on my perspective/attitude before that, otherwise I don’t know if I would have tried as hard as I have. I’m a better person because of him. I think sometimes things that remind us life is precious can really help put things into perspective. >

My dad used to be really hard on me about school and basically everything else. I grew up and we had a deep conversation and I decided to ask him why he was always so much harder on me than my older brother. He told me some stuff about me being like him with potential that he wanted to see come to fruition. Then he added on there “gonehamlot, you gotta realize I was a lot younger and I was still learning how to be a dad. I didn’t mean to be so hard on you, but I didn’t know what I was doing half the time, I just acted like I did. If I could go back and do things a little differently I would, but I also see the man you’ve become so it’s hard to completely regret the things I did.” It was really eye opening. At the end of the day we’re all just humans learning as we go trying our best. >

It’s kind of crazy when I look back and realize that my younger siblings were raised by different people than I was. My parents were different parents to me than they are to my younger siblings. There are plenty of reasons for this, but I’d like to think that one of them is that I was able to make a difference. >

It's an odd moment when you look at a parent and realise they are old. Maybe it's because my parents were so young when they had me, but just the day you look at them and notice the grey hairs and wrinkles for the first time is a strange experience. >

Kids are egocentric because all they know is that they exist. As we grow older and understand more of the world around us, and hopefully learn compassion to other people too, that's when we realize others are growing along us. >

but now i realize that they weren't growing to the better, more like downgrading in several aspects, and it upsets me
even now i end up hiding from them in video games, or mobile games in bluestacks, because i don't want to talk to them or hear them talk about ridiculous stuff they saw on TV.. i know it's bad of me but i just can't listen to them repeat the lies and i can't explain to them that it's lies because they don't listen to me >

I feel you.