>

Man wish I could get 140k a year working five hours a day for a total of four months a year.
This will probably go down as the 118th Congress' most successful day. >

Definitely one of the Congresses of all time. >

It is not, in fact, legislatin’ time >

is it infrastructure week?? >

Hey we finally got Trump’s tax returns, so who knows? >

longest "two weeks folks" ever >

Not a great start for the new House majority.
Who knew? >

Literally 100 years since this last happened. >

The amount of things that happened 100 years ago that we’ve repeated in the last three years is incredible. >

this once in a lifetime schtick is getting kinda old, not gonna lie. If i got 60 more years of this shit, take the shot plz kthxbai. >

We’re about 10 years away from being 100 years from Hitler’s election, so you might want to check out a bit sooner. >

we've already had a few upstart totalitarian wanna-bes try. They just lack the charisma, failing economy, and scapegoat to truly become the next hitler. >

We’re in the roaring twenties again, remember how “Great” the 1930’s were?:) >

Cries in great gatsby >

I just read an article about topsoil loss in the midwest, and how we might have another “Dust Bowl” like event like in the 1930’s too! which would obviously mess up farming, food, the economy etc. 
So we might have another Great Depression along with a dustbowl and other extreme fires and weather. Probably some water wars too.. 
I’m not sure if states like Nevada, California and Arizona will eventually fight politically or physically over water when there’s not enough to go around, but there’s almost certainly going to be some central Asian and African water wars in the late 20’s or 30’s. Mostly because countries are going to continue to build dams and cut off their neighbors. There’s already tensions between Ethiopia and Egypt over a dam that got built there and water is becoming the new gold or oil. So yeah I’m super optimistic about the 2030’s lol. >

Yeah, we're going to have to protect the great lakes.  They're like 20% of the world's fresh water.  F U Nestle!  Michigan wants its cash money for all that water you're using for free. >

I think the GOP should spend the next two years holding three failed speaker votes a day. That's probably more productive than whatever they actually want to do in Congress. >

They can’t do anything until a speaker is picked. They don’t get paid until one gets picked either. >

Imagine that is what gets Jeffries elected Speaker?  
"I JUST WANNA GET FUCKIN' PAID MAN!" - the 6 GOP Reps. who vote for him, probably. >

Lol.
GOP congressmen have lots of other sources of money besides paychecks. >

But they can't vote on bills and form committees to get the info they need for insider trading without the Speaker. >

Which isn’t really a problem when the corporations paying them want to prevent bills from being passed. 
Now they don’t even have to publicly vote against providing healthcare, gun control, taxing the rich, or stopping climate change. 
Not having a functioning government is a good thing for people who want to stop the government from doing things. >

Just like republicans to literally repeat history 100 years later. 1920 headline reads “Radicals thwart nomination for Speaker” >

1923 >

You are correct, don’t always type what my brain says ! >

Do nothing party does nothing >

McCarthy will endorse Trump as their Presidential candidate for 2024, then the MAGA faction will vote for McCarthy.
Republicans have lost to MAGA party already.
I'm betting that's how it will pan out. >

For Boebert etc it's personal, they just hate Kevin.  There is nothing he can do to win them over, they don't trust anything he says.
Kevin's gonna have to move his shit back out of the Speaker's office. >

That’s a funny jab at McCarthy though. >

Absolutely. The infighting is edging closer and closer to "Lord of the Flies" level...
George Santos better watch out when they start looking for a pig's head for the stick.
Edit: a word >

Not just a loser. A triple loser. >

Like trump. >

He loses bigly. >

Lots of people are saying it. >

Lots of very smart people...some of the smartest really >

A man came up to me, a construction worker, a big man, a strong man he was crying, and he told me what people are saying and i said "ok" >

And he said, “Sir…” >

Believe me >


“We never had this kind of chaos when I was speaker.”- George Santos >

“I didn’t say I was the speaker. I said that when I talk, I’m a speaker.” - George Santos, 6 days later >

"Also I didn't mean that I was a literal speaker, but when I play back my spoken words on my phone, in speaker mode, I'm Speaker-ish." >

"Some of my best friends are speakers." >

“Did I say friends? I meant people I know from work.  They are technically the closest to me and would be my versions of best friends” >

"You misunderstood me. By work, I was referring to the place closest to me where people work. My best friends are attendants at Super America." >

Strike 4, coming up. >

2 more outs and 8 more innings and he’s in trouble >

So, like, what happens if they never vote in a speaker? >

Endless votes for a speaker until a new House. >

Sounds very American. >

They voted 133 times over two months once back in 1855. >

I feel like we shouldn't really be comparing our current selves to our 1800's selves >

Why not? The basic systems haven't changed, now we just let women vote. >

And non-white people >

Sometimes >

And often throw those votes away in states like Texas or Georgia,through the schetchiest of means. >

They had 2 months to get this shit together, and they couldn't do it.
They've been expecting to have to have their shit together for this for over a year and they still couldn't do it.
The first time in 100 years people didn't have this shit settled prior to the start of the new congress >

And the fact that it's even worse than anyone legitimately expected lmao >

Kevin is like the dumbass who keep applying for the same job he’s not qualified for not understanding why he’s not qualified lol 
“I earned it” made me laugh lol >

That was the most entitled thing I’ve ever heard.  And I remember some conservatives going off in 2016 about Hillary expecting to be coronated. >

They hate everyone cause they think everyone is just like them. >

Remember when the GOP pushed Boehner out and McCarthy wanted to be speaker but didn’t have the votes so they recruited Paul Ryan? This clown show has been going on for a long time. >

That went over so well that Ryan literally retired at the end of his term. >

No leaks!!! >

It will be interesting to see how much the votes change when they vote again. Or who the clowns nominate. >

Pundits say opportunist Elise Stefanik got a chance. She’s one of Trump’s trumpiest. >

Stefanik was moderate Republican but the moment, democrats got house in 18. She basically became the most trumpest Republican >

That seems pretty unstable.  I don't know how you can go from "moderate" to "insurrectionist" like that.  I am guessing she was already a nut to begin with or just an opportunist always on the lookout for the next opportunity. >

The largest majority of Republicans in congress aren't true believers and are just opportunists. They'll be as trumpy, xenophobic, and reactionary as their base wants them to be and the second the tide turns in the other direction they'll talk about decorum and pretend they were never one of those republicans. 
The exception is folks like MTG who are true believers and completely off their goddamn rocker. >

If they are supporting the idiocy, it doesn't matter.  They are True Believers.  Never forget.  Never forgive.  Fuck these traitors. 
Something something a table of 11 Nazis. >

Oh I absolutely agree, believer or not they're awful people capitalizing on the destruction of their nation. They can all rot. >

I'm delighting in McCarthy's inability to become speaker. He debased himself for years thinking that he'd be rewarded with the Speakership. And this is his reward for being utter trash. This is wonderful. >

I'd sooner elect him manager for a Waffle House than any house leadership position. McCarthy's decade of waffling and trying to have it both ways within his own party is coming home to roost. 
Good. Fuck 'em; couldn't have happened to a nicer guy. It's politicians like McCarthy who are the worst for the country. Only in it for themselves and not for the good of the American people - not that it wasn't obvious by his party affiliation these days, but McCarthy was an especially brash and open example of hypocrisy and saying / taking any position to be in power. >

Dude, don’t insult Waffle House service like that.  Those people work basically every holiday and deal with all sorts of unstable clientele and yet they always run like a well-oiled machine.
We usually try to drop into a Waffle House on late Christmas morning to order coffee and leave a big tip for the people working that holiday.  The last time we did, they had even organized a toy drive for small children and were handing out impeccably wrapped gifts to any children in the restaurant.  We were adamant that our sons had received many gifts earlier that morning and that we really just needed some coffee and they wouldn’t hear of it.
TLDR: McCarthy couldn’t manage a Waffle House without an unacceptable decrease in the quality of service based on my limited experience. >


We usually try to drop into a Waffle House on late Christmas morning to order coffee and leave a big tip for the people working that holiday. The last time we did, they had even organized a toy drive for small children and were handing out impeccably wrapped gifts to any children in the restaurant. We were adamant that our sons had received many gifts earlier that morning and that we really just needed some coffee and they wouldn’t hear of it.

Goddamn. This makes me want to go to a waffle house and tip the fuck out of those people. >

Cannot recommend it enough.  My in-laws picked up the idea from somewhere so we’ve only been doing it the past couple years.  If you go in with a group, try to spread yourselves out a bit in case they don’t do tip sharing.
My preferred method is to drink my coffee and quietly put cash under the empty mug and walkout.  My in-laws prefer a more conversational approach.  Whatever works best for you in the moment is what you should do.  Just don’t film that shit and post it online.  The idea is to be at least somewhat inconspicuous or circumspect about it.
We’ve also been tossing around the idea of taking coffee and cookies to the floor nurses and doctors at the nearby hospital, but that seems like it’s going to (understandably) involve more red tape. >

This is becoming a greek drama and I’m loving it. >

I’m Greek with relatives to America in both sides of the political spectrum and for me it’s more like Greek comedy >

Haha, I was thinking a classic tragedy. He wanted speaker so bad he caused his own demise. >

Hunter's laptop predicted this. >

Those thick cock veins, they're like scriptures >

...Hallowed be thy name?? >

Hallowed be thy vein. >

Hollowed by thy vein… >

Thy king dong cum >

Thy well be hung >

In girth, as it is an 11” >

give us this day our daily head >

and forgive us our thick asses >

lmao get fucked
By the way, this slows down whatever ongoing aid resolutions for Ukraine are/were/would be in the works, which I'm sure pleases the GOP's master in Moscow.
So while this clown show is mildly entertaining, it is also convenient for some of our adversaries. >

Exactly. I’m the captain of the “USS GOP Chaos” and I don’t want to see this longer for more than a couple days at most. There is still shit to get done that does transcend party politics. Like Ukraine and naming post offices. >

With the margin being so low, 6, this probably won't go more than a couple days. 
Dem's can make some pretty nice promises when they only need to turn 6. >

If you bring jobs home in a purple district you might get some blue dog dems >

But who actually trusts the GOP to keep their promises anymore? >

They dont need the GOP. They need "Texas Democrat" style Republicans who are really mostly Republicans becuase of where they serve. The kind that get Democratic votes in their elections and can find some headway with the Dems. The kind that will get rewarded in their districts. >

Somehow Fox News will blame the democrats. >

Fox buried this story big time on their website. I haven't bothered watching any of their TV shows though, so not sure what's being said on cable. >

“Democrats refusal to vote for a Republican speaker is preventing the very necessary investigations of Joe Biden and the laptop from hell to going forward. Is Joe Biden using the Ukrainian bribe money from his son to prevent a vote? I’m just asking questions”
Tucker “punch my face” Carlson sometime tomorrow. >

Are you their writer? If not, you should apply. >

Options from here, as I understand, in order of likelihood:
1) Repubs cave, McCarthy is speaker
2) Repubs back someone new
3) Repubs vote for the Dem
4) Enough Repubs are absent that the Dems 212 votes are the majority, and the Dem wins
5) Enough Dems are absent that McCarthy's votes are the majority
6) There is a deadlock that goes for months until pressure mounts on mandatory bills that need passing, like the debt ceiling, which forces one of the previous options >

Another option is a moderate, reasonable republican gets a few nominations, and the entire democratic caucus votes for them. >

More likely is they'll elect someone none of them really like but doesn't offend too many people. Someone they'll vote for in desperation to get it over with.  And then that person will have few allies and little support and be totally useless.  Bring it on. >

Yeah, everybody hates the Speaker. You put up with (and respect) them because they pass legislation.
But the Republicans don't want to pass legislation, so it's a thankless job and a career ender. McCarthy is basically the only person stupid enough to want it, and he can't even have it because his conference is eating itself. >

Great entertainment, though! Just imagine the temper tantrums Trump is having right now >

Looks like a Trump endorsement is the political equivalent of appearing on a Madden game cover. >

The Freedom Caucus has done more damage to the GOP than any outside force could ever be capable of. Their looney voters orchestrated a violent attack on the US Capitol, their reality-deprived candidates killed any Conservative momentum that was supposed to come from the midterms, and now their benchwarmer incumbents have crippled McCarthy before a single swearing in takes place. >

This line is very accurate today:
“You don’t have the votes, you don’t have the votes
You’re gonna need congressional approval and you don’t have the votes” >

Gym Jordan a solid 3rd place... >

If Jeffries wins this because the GOP is eating itself, I may die laughing…. >

Me too, although I don't know how that happens if they can just keep voting until they get a result they like.
Seriously: what ultimately stops this process? >

A new House. Either they vote a speaker in or they keep voting until a new congress is voted in. >

And months of humiliation might actually find five or six GOP members have shame and will vote to end the madness >

He needs a dozen or so votes.  He could only afford to miss like 5 votes.  He's got a long way to go.  But some of the opposition can simply vote 'present' and it shifts the count. >

MTG must be absolutely steamed right now. She was going to be the power behind the throne if McCarthy won. He still might win; she still might get to be de facto in charge. >

Large marge sold her compatriots out for a spot at the table, still gets fucked by her own craziness. Gotta love it. >

I'd watch a Coen brothers movie about GOP internal politics. Although I guess they already made Burn After Reading. >

Welcome to the GOP civil war. >

Whoever does get elected is going to be no more permanent than Boris Johnson or Theresa May. The US House will turn over as the Republicans continue their scorched-earth war against American values. >

No joke. 
McCarthy agreed to a provision that would allow any 5 house reps to call for a revote of the speaker. 
Now they're requesting that ANY SINGLE house rep can call a revote. 
This means that McCarthy will have absolutely zero power. Any 5 Republicans can simply call a revote if he doesn't do what they say. Possibly any one house rep. >

/r/conservative is saying "Progressives WISH they gave Pelosi as much hell as this! This is democracy and how you make your leaders listen!"
Lmaooooooooo
I love watching them fall apart while still thinking they're doing something right. 
It's like Monty Python & the Holy Grail's the Black Knight scene all over again. >

Tis only a flesh wound lol 🤣👌 >

a flesh wound, your arms off >

No it isn’t. >

👇 Well, what's that then? >

This is some serious covfefe >

It certainly isn't a nothingburger. >

ima try an sell 'nothinburgers' on truth social, it will be two buns wrapped in plastic delivered for $17.76 each. seems about the level of effort to grift the right wing fucks in the US, they seem dense as shit. >

Make sure that plastic is emblazoned with the US flag and you've got yourself a winner! >

yeah with a 'made in china' stamp on back of the shitty plastic flag. that's gold, jerry, gold! >

A sticker that says
Made In America!
^((Made in China)) >

Don't forget a little gold statue of Jesus with Trump's head on it as the happy meal toy equivalent >

buddy christ >

lmao fucken moron Chip Roy went up there and blabbed about needing to fix the country and then immediately nominated Jim fucking Jordan for speaker and Jim got 19 votes to keep McCarthy from winning. 
Holy fuck this entire party is a goddamn circus. >

Jim Jordan, who nominated McCarthy for Speaker, and who also didn’t report the sexual exploitation of student athletes who were under his supervision. >

Yeah, Jim Jordan is fucking sexual predator, and got 19 votes to lead the house. Jordan says he doesn't want the job for personal reasons and those reasons are the skeletons in his closet will finally be front and center if he's elected speaker. 
If Jordan were elected speaker every major news publication should write him as; "Jim Jordan, GOP Speaker of the House and sexual predator from Ohio.." >

So what do you think lil Kev will be promising all the magas tonight to secure their vote? My guess is a gold plated frame around a collage of Hunters dick pics? >

They’re pushing for a rule that says a handful (5?) can vote for a new speaker at any time. Which would keep the R speaker in the thrall of the most insane, or a rotating chair of failed speakers for the next 2 years. >

Nah he already said he'd grant the 5 revote thing. 
Apparently now they're playing hardball and requesting that a SINGLE person can call a revote on speaker.
They're doing this on purpose to stall government funding. ~20 Republicans are holding the entire government hostage. >

This is the kind of governance we can expect from the Republicans for the next two years, good thing the Senate doesn't have to suffer the same fate. >

What’s the difference between Kevin McCarthy and today’s date?
One is 1-3, the other is 0-3. >

Did you make this up? Genuinely lol'd over here >

House Republicans praying for a government shutdown rn >

I mean I gotta hand it to Gaetz and crew- if you wanted to gum up the works of government as much you possibly can, this is a great  gambit. >

McCarthy deserves nothing less than this utter humiliation. This spineless bastard deserves to be ridiculed and mocked every single day for the rest of his time in elected office.
This is what he gets for cavorting with     Nazis and Fascists, voting to overturn the last election, and reviving Donald Trump’s political career in the aftermath of January 6th.
He’s an utter disgrace. A failure. A man who sold out our country in the pursuit of power. History will either remember him as the worst Speaker in our country’s existence, if he somehow squeaks by and ekes out a win to become an ultimately powerless and crippled leader, or remember him for utterly destroying his career and ambitions in the craven pursuit of power. His descendants will be ashamed they share his DNA.
Fuck this guy. >

He lost by an extra vote on the last one. LMAO. 
This is giving me "repeal and replace" vibes. Nobody knows what they're doing. >

2 trailer park girls go round the outside. >

Marjorie and Boebert? >

Ah so you have seen Rifle? >

When they finally get a winning vote, will white smoke go up the chimney? >

Meanwhile Jefferies is over on the other side collecting Ws without doing anything.
By the way did you know that dude is 52? He looks 40 something >

The aftertaste of Trump's ass. >

This is the worst sentence that has ever been written. >

From what I understand:
19 people, now 20, have voted for J. Jordan as opposed to K. McC because K. McC isn’t Trumpy enough?  (And since he isn’t Trumpy enough, they don’t want him for speaker.)
Yes?
No?
Maybe? >

The odd thing is that McCarthy gave concessjons for the "freedom caucus" and all was well until today when they decided that whatever he gives them they won't support him  
So this leaves McCarthy to either get democratic support which is impossible, make even more extreme concessions to the far right but they seem stubborn enough to refuse any concession, or finally which is probably the only choice left: for him to step down  
It seems he isn't keen on that so this would probably carry on indefinitely >

All was not well until today. Everyone knew this was going to happen (at least once). >

McCarthy should have quit when he had only 19 defectors. >

But McCarthy vowed they’ll “re-adjourn” tomorrow at noon.