>

Still manages to eat better than a College student minus the Alcohol.
Dude can power up a whole city as a living salt battery. >

Those sharks missed out on one taaasty snack! >

Man’s blood pressure is gonna be so high, as soon as they stick him with an iv, he’s fly all over the room like a deflating balloon. >

Shit 24 days, that is an insanely long time alone at sea. Almost a month shit, with hardly no food or water at the mercy of a ferocious ocean. >

Sure yeah. They would take turtles on voyages with them but they found out the turtles are so tasty they quickly run out >

Is he now a seasoned sailor? >

Incredible. Hope your comment gets seen by many. >

He will of course be played in the movie by Matt Damon. >

Never. This role was made for Tom Hanks. >

Castaway 2? >

Castaway2 : you’ve got salt. >

This time he makes a new friend. FRANKLIN!!!! >

hey, i mean i live in canada that's pretty much what i'm eating now......
who the fuck can afford groceries? >

That's depressing to hear. I'm sorry. >

Surely there would have been lower salt content in the ocean >

Minimum wage earners survive at home 365 days eating ketchup, garlic powder and seasoning cubes. >

“ We are glad you survived the ordeal….. Here, have a mint” >

all he needed was a little spice in his life! >

If only he had an onion >

And a peach >

Still manages to eat better than a College student minus the Alcohol. >

When he was brought food they offered him french frys with ketchup and he said "get that shit out of my face" >

What's the point of the garlic powder? Could that really help? >

Those sharks missed out on one taaasty snack! >

Seasoned to perfection. >

Dude can power up a whole city as a living salt battery. >

No haemoglobin in his blood, only Gatorade. >

BronDow the thirst mutilator. >

Is he now a seasoned sailor? >

He’s the Boullion Bouy. >

These puns are coming so fast I won’t be able to ketchup >


I've heard that old sailships would keep a stockpile of live turtles for this reason. Apparently they can survive a very long time without food or water.

Well, they tried to. Turns out Galapagos turtles are so delicious, that none ever made it back on the journey to Europe. Because of this, it took 300 years for the turtle to get a proper scientific name. >

I gotta imagine fresh anything is delicious when you're sailing across the Atlantic >

Man’s blood pressure is gonna be so high, as soon as they stick him with an iv, he’s fly all over the room like a deflating balloon. >

Shit 24 days, that is an insanely long time alone at sea. Almost a month shit, with hardly no food or water at the mercy of a ferocious ocean. >

He must have had water, it's not biologically possible otherwise >

Says in the article he collected rainwater with a cloth.
So he was drinking. But "He had water" is maybe still putting it a bit generously. >


he collected rainwater with a cloth

Honestly a pretty good idea all things considered, a soaked piece of cloth can serve as short term storage too depending on the air humidity and temperature. >

He will of course be played in the movie by Matt Damon. >

Never. This role was made for Tom Hanks. >

Castaway 2? >

Castaway2 : you’ve got salt. >

This time he makes a new friend. FRANKLIN!!!! >

hey, i mean i live in canada that's pretty much what i'm eating now......
who the fuck can afford groceries? >

Had a Canadian roommate who lived a month on ramen and condiments to win a bet with other roommate for three months free rent if he could live on “the condiments in this house.” He REALLY  consumed nothing but water, three packs of Ichiban ramen noods per day and condiment packets. Original bet was nothing but condiments but I moderated and insisted on the ramen allowance and a “no winner” call if he got sick.  He never left the house, never cheated, never stole an apple or grapefruit from us. Ketchup, mustard, mayonnaise, plum sauce.   I brought him Wendy’s sweet and sour, ranch and candied lemon rind packets for his birthday.  This guy’s a chef- he’s not used to a starvation diet and he’s starting to hurt in a few days. Week two I brought a box of peanut butter packets, jams and marmalade home -a gift from a certain friend who has dumpster privileges at her certain government job.  But I think it was the relish that saved him.    End of month we took him to the best local BBQ place- big mistake.  He had a gall bladder attack (never heard of this before) and wound up needing surgery and can’t eat fatty foods anymore. Serious shit for his $360 win.  
Unbelievable I know. But 4 of us really paid $120 each for our 4 bedroom house back in 1990s. It even had a yard >

Thats insane. >

Minimum wage earners survive at home 365 days eating ketchup, garlic powder and seasoning cubes. >

But... Not the onion? >

Except for all the sugar in the ketchup, he was effectively starving as there are little nutrients in the rest of it. >

Surely there would have been lower salt content in the ocean >

“ We are glad you survived the ordeal….. Here, have a mint” >

Hospital bill
Mint $85 >

↑ Spot the 'murican >

When he was brought food they offered him french frys with ketchup and he said "get that shit out of my face" >

Reminds me of the scene in Cast Away where they hold a welcome home party for the main character featuring a seafood buffet. >

He was just at work repairing a boat when it got swept out to sea.
Is that like a workplace safety thing? Is there something boat repairmen are supposed to do to make sure that doesn't happen? >

My kids explaining how they survived while I was taking a shower >

I eat condiments for fun and people think I’m nuts. This would be my time to SHINE >

Doctors report his condition as "flavorful" >

all he needed was a little spice in his life! >

If only he had an onion >

And a peach >

24 days you can plausibly survive without eating at all (certainly it is healthier to eat something though).
What'd he do for water? I think he'd be better off not eating seasoning cubes, those have to be extremely dehydrating. >

the article says he collected rain water with a cloth