>

For the record, if someone actually had a pet possum that’d be far more interesting than a pet cat, purely for the novelty of it.
By his logic anyone anyone that didn't die in 9/11 survived it >

Just like my Irish great grandparents survived the Holocaust. By being in Ireland. >

I survived the last major global extinction. >

That's right, baby! 1-0 vs asteroids, how many dinosaurs can say that? NONE, that's how many! >

Except for all the birds, of course >

Check this guy out, they think birds are real! >

But what are birds? We just don't know. >

Look around you >

That's how she survived. >

He is technically correct. The best kind of correct. >

Who are three people who’ve never been in my kitchen? >

we all went to school w this guy, right? parents live in a mansion, dad is a top secret spy, has every game console and every game ever made, knows karate. you finally go to his house and it's a trailer, his cat's a possum, the pool's inflatable, but you can't even be mad. except in this case you can.