>

On a horse made of crystal he patrols the land
With his Mason ring and schnauzer and his perfect hands
Well, it was about that time that the US Government noticed that the Chinese weather balloon was about 200 feet tall and was a crustacean from the protozoic era. >

I gave him a dollar I thought he'd go away >

Well of course he's not going to go away. You give him a dollar he's going to assume you've got more. >

She gave him a dollar! >

We had taco salad for dinner >

Lmao I have an old relative who asked "instead of destroying it, why don't they just use a helicopter to catch it, so that they can fully inspect its components and the data it gathered?", as if you can catch it like Spongebob catches Jellyfish. >

Ahh yes… helicopters at 60,000 feet. >

The Lama set the record at about 41,000 feet fifty one years ago.
It's also the autorotation record, and one of those "That's great lets never do it again" records. >

There is a Llama that flew 41000 feet in the air? How did I never hear about this, I’m a big fan of Llamas. 🦙 >

Her name is pickles and we are very proud >

“Pickles come eat your DINNER!”
Throws casserole at llama. >

That was Tina >

Vote for Tina >

That's not the kind of balloon you get at the party store. >

Have you tried asking? >

Hey, do you have a two hundred foot balloon I could use? >

…for “tracking weather” >

"Why yes we have one right here!"
Made in China >

Are they studying one thing about it a day? Tomorrow there will be a news article that says "suspected Chinese spy balloon was filled with helium." >

Gotta max them clicks! >

The Chinese spy balloon once held an opponents wife's hand. >

...in a jar of acid...at a party. >

I heard... Chinese Spy Balloon's got like.... Thirty goddamn dicks. >

[Chinese Spy Balloon]’ll save children, but not the British children.