Title: [TX] Renting an apartment with my boyfriend, we both went in 50/50 with furniture. If I leave, am I entitled to anything?

Question:
Hey Reddit, throwaway here. First off I want to say that I have NO idea how to go about fairly handling the below mentioned situation, and I have no desire to screw anyone over. I just wanna know what I am entitled to, if anything.

I live in an apartment complex with my boyfriend of 3 1/2 years. Lately our relationship has become tumultuous to say the least and I am starting to think that we should break up. We signed a 13 month lease, with both of us signing as applicants to be held responsible for the rent. Our lease is up in December.

My boyfriend makes quite a bit more money than I do so he took it upon himself to configure a 60/40 split on the bills to better fit our respective budgets. He pays 60% and I pay 40%. We bought all new furniture together: washer/dryer, couch and love seat, dining room table with 4 chairs, a mattress, and a bedroom set including frame, headboard, and a dresser. The furniture was split equally: he paid half and I paid half. Together with everything we probably paid a combined total of 3,500. Now that we are considering breaking up, I'm wondering what we should do about the furniture and rent? If we do decide to break up, he would stay at the apartment and I would more than likely move back in with my parents. He has mentioned in the past (albeit on amicable terms) that if we were to break up he would either A) give me the washer/dryer and keep the rest of the furniture (I would be okay with this. I want the W/D, my parents do not have one) or B) pay me a lump sum of a portion what I put into the furniture and he just keeps everything to make moving out easier, which I am equally okay with.

Now that things are as rocky as they are though, he has expressed that he shouldn't have to split any of the furniture or give me any money to be able to keep all of it because he would be left with picking up the rest of the rent. He doesn't want to compromise on anything. If I do leave though more than likely he would find someone to move in with him to pick up what I would not be paying. Also, he's been looking at buying a particular house soon and he says if that goes through with it then he'll just break the lease and pay whatever penalty fees there are (in the case of our apartment complex, they simply ask us to pay 3 months in advance or something like that.) I should mention that this house will be somewhat furnished, mostly with items that we already have.

I've thought about just riding out the rest of the lease with him and trying to work things out, but I'm not sure we'll be able to do that. Either way I am not asking for too much, I just hate the thought of putting a bunch of money into furniture that I will never see again. Am I stingy for thinking this? Then again though, he will have to pick up my portion of the rent ($480) and finish out the lease by himself (possibly, if he cannot find a buddy to move in.)

Do I have any rights to the furniture? And if we do make it to the end of the lease and still decide to break up, how should we go about splitting stuff up then?

I hope this isn't entirely trivial, I know it isn't a lot of money to be fussing over but I can't help but feel as if there should be some form of compromise out there.

tl;dr boyfriend and I might break up, how do we evenly and fairly split the furniture that we bought together?

Answer: This isn't a legal issue until one of you decides to sue. You can divide it however you want to. If either sues, the judge may order you to sell it and divide up the money, or whatever party wants it more pay the other for half of the fair market value.


Title: Dogs as visitors

Question: if a coop has a no dogs rule, can they prevent dogs coming with a visitor? I live in Nassau county, Long Island, NY.

Answer: If the rule is no dogs it can be assumed this means dogs are not permitted on the property.  Service dogs are an exception, they must be allowed.


Title: What do I do? Please help

Question: dear reddit, my kids dad tried to commit suicide. lets be clear, by that i mean he stabbed himself in the chest/stomach four to five times and also slit his throat. he nicked his heart in the process and also got his liver. he is in icu now in somewhat stable condition. he lives in a hole in the wall town in montana. somehow he ended up with custody. he is in the hospital now and i have to get the kids. he is abusive to them. he is violent as proved multiple incidences involving this one. his mom, the kids grandma, thinks she can keep them until he heals from the hospital and that they dont need to go to me. this is the woman who buys the beer for her son, the kids dad. i need to go to their town tomorrow morning and file paperwork for an emergency parenting plan. yes kne stands right now where he has custody. i need to change that and i need it to change as soon as tomorrow. what do i say, how do i best word this, and what papers do i file? help me reddit. i know someone out there reading this knows the answer to my questions.

Answer: Ma'am, you need to get a lawyer. There is no possible way that we can provide the help you need.


Title: Suing a bank that won't give me the money from my cashed out account? [IN/IL/PA]

Question:
So two summers ago I worked as an intern in Pennsylvania. My first paycheck went to a cash card because my direct deposit wasn't fully set up yet. I never received this cash card in the mail and sort of put off doing anything about it until around February of this year. I called them and was informed that the account has been closed and the funds (a bit north of $1K) will be sent to me. Great, except from Februrary to the present day I have called them on average 1-2 times a month to escalate the issue and still have not received my funds. I am currently trying to get a digital record of these escalations, but I have email proof that this dates back to at least July. What are my options here? Despite this issue being marked as urgent for months I have no faith that I will get my money normally. Should I sue? Would it make sense to do so costwise? How would I go about that?

I am a college student going to school in Illinois and my permanent address (parents' house) is in Indiana, so I wasn't sure what state to put.

Answer:
 Did you ever speak to your employer about you not getting paid?

If you never received your wages, then your issue is with the employer you had, and not the bank.  Pennsylvania allows you to file a wage complaint up to three years after the missing wages.  I'd start there, since you're running out of time on doing that.


Title: Never the Same after My Hospitalization

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 >I clearly did not need a hospitalization, yet they made me get one and I came out in much worsened condition than when I had called them.

You are in no position to assert any of this.  Your memories are unreliable and your own version of events supports the decision to hospitalize you.

Marijuana can trigger psychotic breaks in those already susceptible to them.  You need to see a psychiatrist.

You also need to negotiate or pay your bill or you will be harmed financially with bad credit and a potential judgment against you.


Title: My girlfriend's cousin died because he was stoned and thought his neighbor's house was his and when he couldn't get in he slept on the porch and died. She was at work. His parents' lawyer sent a letter asking for $. Can they actually sue her if she doesn't pay - in Michigan

Question: He froze to death because of the weather and that's how he died. If he was stoned and the neighbor wasn't even home can she really be found at fault? We both think this is a terrible idea.

Answer:
 Unless the parents lied, that lawyer needs to be sanctioned.Answer #2: If they actually file it will be pro se because no lawyer would risk his or her license for such a stupid suit.

http://legislature.mi.gov/doc.aspx?mcl-600-2591Answer #3: Yes, they can sue her. People sue for stupid reasons all the time, especially when they're looking for someone else to blame. But realistically speaking, they're not going to win. And even if they try to sue, her homeowner's insurance will have her back and likely take care of everything.  Answer #4: Anyone can be sued at any time for any reason. So yes, they could be sued. There's not a snowball's chance in hell they'll lose that suit, but technically yes they could be sued.


Title: The "disaster restoration" contractors that were hired to repair my fire-condemned condo are doing terrible work. I did not hire them and I do not own the insurance policy that is paying them. What recourse do I have?

Question:
Here's the backstory (apologies in advance for the length): my wife and I own a condo in a high-rise building. Four days before Christmas, our elderly upstairs neighbor's caregiver improperly disposed of a cigarette, causing a fire that left both his and my unit condemned by the fire marshall (thankfully nobody was hurt!). We were told that it would be some number of weeks or months before our home would be habitable again.

My building's master insurance policy was activated, and without my input or consent, disaster restoration workers were almost immediately gutting our condo to remove all the soaked material before it could become a mold risk. The entire condo was stripped down to the studs. All walls, cabinets, flooring, and countertops were removed. Most of our furniture was declared as a loss. A different set of contractors were then hired by the building management and under the building's insurance policy (again, without my input) to begin rebuilding.

It has been a rocky few months since then. After three months living in hotels and eating nearly every meal at restaurants, we reached the limit of our personal homeowner's policy's loss-of-access coverage, and are now forced to burden our friends for a place to stay. The contractors have been moving at what seems like a glacial pace, and have refused to provide anything more than a tentative work schedule, to which they would not sign.

Work is finally nearing completion, but we have become concerned about the quality of this contractor's workmanship. Their drywall joints are cracking in some places. Their finishing work on the concrete ceiling is cracking. They have neglected to properly fill in the nail holes in any of their trim work, instead just trying to paint over it. I have brought up all of these issues with the foreman, and while he has not denied their existence, his attempts to address these issues seemingly involve globbing more paint and drywall mud on top of already flawed work.

I feel like we are backed against a wall. We are out of money, and we are wearing out our welcome with friends. Our final walk-through date was already delayed a week after I brought up a number of cosmetic flaws, which were then poorly repaired. It seems to be common practice to hold contractors accountable for their work by withholding payment, but they are largely funded by the building's insurance policy, whom they are billing directly. I can withhold a small amount of money that I owe them for some kitchen upgrades, but that's it. I have also not signed a contractor agreement or any similar document to which I can legally bind them. Perhaps the building management or their insurance has signed such a document, but they have not mentioned it to me.

So I guess the question is: how do I hold these contractors accountable for the quality of their workmanship when I am not directly employing them? If they are uncooperative or generally incompetent, what recourse do I have? Do I have any leverage over the building management or their insurance company to withhold payment from these contractors (state is Virginia, in case that is relevant)? Any advice would be greatly appreciated – I just want them to do the job right and do it quickly, so we can finally go home!

Answer:
 Do you have a mortgage?  Call the mortgage company and express your concerns with the workmanship.  They certainly want thier loan collateral preserved value wise,  and will act to make sure the work was done right.  Just impress upon them that the value of the property may be substantially harmed and thier aid is required to preserve the value of the collateral,  by no fault of your own.

Mortgage companies usually have rules to follow concerning major property rehab after a major loss like this,  such has releasing money a little at a time.

Is there a board or hoa thing of some sort?  Maybe talking to them would be worthwhile too.


Title: My ex is a pregnant drug addict

Question: So my ex girlfriend (my girlfriend at the time) found out she was pregnant 8 months ago and confessed to being an active heroin user when she found out. She assured me she would get clean but three months later I found out she never quit. So we started seeing doctors and got her on subutex ( a semi opioid that blocks opioid receptors). This continued for about two months until I found out she relapsed. Shortly after we decided to take a break so that she could get herself together. For three months we were apart, but it was obvious that she was still using. She would ask her co-workers if they were drug tested when they gave birth. And she would frequently change doctors and miss appointments altogether. She is now just over 8 months pregnant and it's become obvious that she is trying to stop so she can het custody of the child. She is now going through detox and putting herself but more importantly her unborn child's life at risk by putting her body through withdrawals. My question is what I can do right now to ensure she detoxes safely? Can I force her to go to a doctor? If not will there be some way for the doctors to know she was on it? If she can get clean enough to test clean for the heroin ( or at least confuse hee body with the subutex) what will I need to do to try to gain custody of this child? I don't do any drugs or smoke cigarettes ( she does) and I support myself and pay half of her rent (currently)  any input at all is much appreciated because from what I can tell she is about 2 or 3 days into her detox and she said she was bleeding.

Answer:
 I don’t care about your ex rn, but she sounds like she’s going to try and hide the fact she’s a druggy to try and keep custody, but I can’t stress this enough: the nurses and doctors need to know.

It won’t just be her having withdrawals, it will be the baby having withdrawals, knowing what she has taken, how long for and how much can be extremely important to getting your baby the right treatment it needs to survive.

You need to interfere and tell the nurses and doctors her history, before the baby is born, and if/when it goes into intensive care. The nurses will also help you get custody, the only good thing is your baby will probably have to stay in hospital for a while, so at least it can’t go home with her straight away. Talk to a lawyer now, and talk to the nurses who will contact the relevant people. Make sure you’re there as much as you can be when the baby is in hospital, and are nice to the staff as they will also have to report how you act to the child services / police.


Title: How long can she wait before making a false rape accusation?

Question: I hooked up with a girl from tinder, she told her friends that I raped her, this was 2 months ago, the thought of this just occured to me, how long can she wait before accusing me of rape? It was totally consensual at the time

Answer:
 What is the statute of limitations for rape in your state?

P.S. Back up all evidence that proofs that you didn't rape her.


Title: As a British citizen, how would I start a religion?

Question: Just a basic, bare-bones, "we have churches" religion.

Answer:
 Congrats YOUVE DONE IT!!!

Did you want any rights or something with that or did you just want to do it?


Title: Negative vacation time for a charter school in Denver (well, Arvada) Colorado?

Question:
I'll try to keep this as succinct as possible.

Last year, my wife ended up taking a lot of time off for a variety of reasons. Our daughter was still a baby, and various health issues surrounding that came up, and there was also a family emergency. She ended up eating all of her PTO during that - sickness, personal, and holiday - and then still had to take days off (that emergency I mentioned). Once her PTO ran out, her pay started getting docked, which makes sense.

This year is the first year the school has had a full time HR person, and this person informed her yesterday that she took so much time off that she now has so much negative vacation time (or indebted time I think she called it) that she has a total of 8 hours of PTO for this academic year. My wife and I are both pretty shocked. Is that a real thing? Is that legal? I mean, that "negative time" that's docking all her personal time this year was unpaid time. That seems like two penalties for one infraction.

I was hoping someone here might know something about this, because it seems deeply unfair.
Topic:
Labor Law

Answer: If she already had her pay docked then it should be over with.  She needs to talk to the new HR person they may not have accurate records.  She should bring in pay stubs and stuff to prove she was already charged for that time offAnswer #2:  Does she have pay stubs from that period? Show the HR person that she received XX number of paid vacation hours.  Unpaid leave doesn't count for anything. It doesn't enter into the calculation.


Title: How do lawyers who have a feeling their client is guilty maintain professionalism?

Question: Or do they? How exactly do they not take it personally if they feel like their client is a genuinely scummy human being? Basically ‘true crime’ has gotten popular lately and a lot of murderers and criminals are blatantly guilty, so it made me curious

Answer: They aren't guilty until the state proves the charges beyond a reasonable doubt. Your job is also to ensure their rights are protected


Title: My mom missed a couple weeks of work because she had the flu, pneumonia and pleurisy. Her employer is firing her because she missed so much.

Question: My mom has been sick for the last couple of weeks. She started having the stomach bug and then went back to work for a day before she came down with the flu. She was out of work for 4 more days before she was diagnosed with pneumonia in the E.R. Then she went back to work for a day or two before she got worse and went back to the E.R. And it turned out she had bronchial pneumonia with scar tissue on her lungs showing up on the X-Ray. She went back to work and then was out for 2 more days with pleurisy. Now she’s been written up because of her missing so many days and they’re firing her because of it. What are her legal options?  We live in the United States, if that helps.

Answer:
 Location in the US is important.

But, for the most part, if she didn’t have an employment contract (or is part of a union) then it is legal.


Title: Got in a street fight last night and got stabbed in the leg

Question:
Last night I got cornered by 2 guys and a girl at MacDonalds after I got a drink inside, and I was able to handle myself until help arrived. There were witness in the drive-through, inside the restaurant and a family outside, they all saw it going down and also saw the time where I was on the floor and the guys I was protecting myself from pulled out a switch blade and tried to stab me in the chest, I was able to somehow dodge it and got hit in the leg, in the shin actually.

&#x200B;

The cut was 4 inches long and hit bone, got 8 staples for that. So I went to the hospital in an ambulance after a good soul called the 911 for me. I already talked to the police and they got a statement from me which means there is action being taken.

&#x200B;

So I want to know what are my options here. I already went to the police and there is video proof of everything. So to summarize I was basically assaulted by these two guys who were incited by this girl to get into a physical conflict. I was cornered and had to defend myself. They also broke my prescription glasses.

&#x200B;

Should I fear something ? Should I know anything if this goes to court ?

&#x200B;

This happened in Toronto, Ontario. I am an international student. Sorry if I missed any details but I am just in a lot of pain  and kinda of shocken this happened here.
Topic:
Personal Injury

Answer: Criminal charges will be filed against them if the police are handling that. You might have a civil case against them for any medical bills and the prescription glasses, but it would be up to a judge or jury to determine if you have a leg to stand on ^(I'm so sorry)


Title: [OH] Trying to get my girlfriend a state ID, but can't

Question:
I made a post on here a few months back when she was still 17, and it's been nearly a year of trying but she has still been unable to get a state ID.

**January 2016**

My girlfriend moves from Florida to Ohio to stay with me. She's 17 at the time, and has no legal documents.

**February**

She opens an online store, and requires a bank account to deposit her received payments. We go to my local branch and they ask for a state ID to open her account, along with other documents.

We go to the local DMV and they ask for her birth certificate and proof of residency in Ohio, as well as someone at least 21 to sign off for her.

I go to the county building and am able to purchase her birth certificate for $20, and then go to the local Post Office for an official change-of-address form.

**March**

We have her birth certificate and change-of-address form, as well as being my dad as the person over 21 to sign for her. We head to the DMV and they say that they needed her legal guardian to sign for her as she's under 18, and that she also needs to bring her social security card.

Her mother is her legal guardian but she hasn't lived with her for 4 years. Her mother lives in Ohio but doesn't want anything to do with her. Her grandmother (who lives in Florida) had been taking care of her but was never her official legal guardian.

**April**

We head to the Social Security office to have a new social security card be mailed to our house. They ask for a state ID. We explained that we needed the social security card to GET the state ID. They asked for other documents that can help prove her identity -- bank statements, w-2 wage forms, medical records, or a school transcript.

She was taken out of school in 8th grade and was home schooled by her grandmother since. We contacted her last school and they wouldn't release her transcript to her without her mother's permission or until she turned 18.

She has no physical medical records and doesn't know exactly where she was born, other than that it was somewhere in Ohio.

**July**

She turned 18. We drive 5 hours to West Virginia to her last school and were able to get a copy of her school transcript.

The day we get back we quickly got to the DMV and they stated that the transcript needed to have her official address and social security number printed on it. We were furious. They also said that just a few dyas prior, the official change-of-address form from the USPS could no longer be used and they literally told us to go to Walmart and buy a fishing license because it'd be an official document with her address on it and you don't need any information to buy one.

We contacted the school and they stated they weren't allowed edit the transcript to give that information.

**August**

I discovered that you can get a US passport without a state ID as long as you have a legal citizen who has known you for 2+ years fill out a form verifying that you are a citizen.

We head to the passport office in my city and once the forms are filled out, the woman asked to see her social security card. We explained the situation and the woman said that she doesn't need an ID, but she did need 2 pieces of identification -- a birth certificate + social security card.

The woman there said there's nothing they could do and that we were in a pretty situation. She said she's never heard of someone in this situation before. We've all but given up.

At this point we have one option -- my girlfriend can get an Offender Release ID card if she commits a crime and gets released from jail/prison. This isn't really something we want to hope for.

**September 2016**

We had a pregnancy scare. We got to Planned Parenthood to get birth control and once the appointment was set up they asked to see her ID. The lady there was extremely rude and was no help. She basically said "if you have a birth certificate you can get an ID".

________________________________________

We don't know what options we have at this point.

My girlfriend's mom refuses to talk to her. She never saved any of her documents so there's no social security card or original birth records. My girlfriend's grandma has never taken her to a hospital before and has never needed to use her SSN for anything.

My girlfriend knows her SSN and we have her birth certificate, a fishing license, an expired military ID from when she was 11 living on a base in Germany, a copy of her school transcript from where she went in 2012 (doesn't have her SSN on it).

We don't know where she was born so she can't request any medical records. I don't know if she'd be able to anyways since she doesn't have an official state ID.

She is unable to get a job, drive a car, open a bank account, or seek medical care because of this.

Answer: quick question. If she lived on a military base abroad, she should have had a passport for travel. there should also be some records somewhere in the Military with her information on it. those are worth trying to follow up on.


Title: What can I be charged with if I deliberately cause damage to or destroy the ISS?

Question: I'm wondering if I can be charged with anything at all considering that there probably aren't any laws in orbit. If the station was manned then I could possibly be charged with murder but I don't know about anything else. What do you guys think?

Answer:
 Why does everyone assume space law isn’t a thing?

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Space_law

You’d be charged with whatever laws you broke in your jurisdiction.


Title: Can I sue a credit union for spelling my name wrong on a Visa gift card without my knowledge? (NY)

Question:
Someone who I know has an account at a credit union and got me a $100 Visa gift card. It should be noted that the card did not have my name printed on the front, but instead had the words, "a gift for you" printed where the name should be. Assuming that the credit union had spelled my name correctly, I called a company to order something with the Visa gift card. (A Visa gift card is basically cash on a prepaid card which can be spent on anything.) I gave the company my name, address, and card number. But they said the change was declined. I went to the website on the back of the gift card and saw that my name was spelled incorrectly. There was no option to change the name online, and the credit union was closed at this point. So, I called the company back and gave them the alternative spelling which was on the card, however they had stored the information from my last call and said they would not process the change. I decided to call them back one final time and use a credit card from my own bank which was separate from the credit union, however the company refused to process that change as well and said they would not do business with me.

The next day, I went to the credit union and they changed the name on the card. I called the company back, and tried to explain to them that the problem was fixed, but they said that if I continued to call them, they would report me for identity theft. If they had reported me, I would most likely have been arrested, and would have had to spend time in jail awaiting trial, unless I could afford bail.

I would like to sue the credit union on the following counts, please tell me if these are incorrect, and what chances I would have of winning.

1. Deformation of Character (This error has made a company think I'm an identity thief and refuse to do business with me.)

2. Negligence (This error was purely because of their negligence.)

3. Pain and Suffering (It was traumatic for a company to call me an identity theft.)

4. Punitive Damages (I was lucky that I wasn't arrested, but other people might not be so lucky.)

EDIT: A woman was able to win a lawsuit against Mcdonald's because her coffee was too hot, so I should be able to win a lawsuit against a credit union for spelling my name wrong.

Answer:
 This is a troll post, trying to get on r/bestoflegaladvice.Answer #2: No, no, no and no.

You're damages are at most $100. If the credit union cannot or will not fix the issue you can small claims for the $100.


Title: Cousin is having a baby with a know pedophile. What are my option to keep the baby safe?

Question:
Cousin is have a baby with this dude who was sentenced 10 years ago of possession of child porno and have pictures with babies in a sexual manner. What can I do to make sure the baby will be safe?
In Qc, Canada.

Answer:
 You should try to convince your cousin that when the baby is born, she needs to obtain a court order that takes the father's convicted pedophile history into account.

If she refuses, you can call the Quebec Directors of Youth Protection (CDPDJ). Or you can call them anyway, if you are worried.


Title: Would appreciate links/info on who "gets to" decide where a loved one is buried

Question:
My mother has passed away.

She was married to my half-brother's father from 1984 to 1987.  She then married my father in 1990 and they were married until he died last June.  They owned funeral plots together and obviously intended to be buried together.  She still called him her husband, still wore her wedding ring, she set a place for him at the table until September, so there is absolutely no question of what she wanted.

However my half brother has made arrangements for her to be buried in Seattle with his father (the man she was married to for 3 years in the 80s).

I know this is not what she would have wanted but I am not sure what to do to even begin to change what is going on, or if I am capable of doing so. I would appreciate any links or info on what the process would be or on who "gets to" decide.

Edit:  I should add that she had a will but it did not include where she wanted to be buried so that won't help

Answer: interesting. i would call a lawyer on this. she should have spelled out her wishes in her will, but i don't know if the fact that she purchased a plot would hold some sway as to this situation.


Title: [LA] I didn't pay for my milk at Walmart, should I take it back or should I just keep it?

Question:
I was in self checkout with my girlfriend and she was being an asshole. I only had 3 things. Eggs, crackers and milk. I put the milk in the bag without scanning it, then picked it up and my gf got mad because I didn't double bag it. Then we had a short argument. The clerk was staring at us. I paid and immediately realized I'd forgotten the milk. In order to avoid bullshit with her getting mad I just walked out of there. I noticed the people looking. I got outside and I told her I didn't scan the milk yet, but she was too busy complaining about how "awkward" I was with the milk and I should double bag it. Literally, she complained about if for ten minutes straight and we got into a fight. She stormed off and I had to go find her.

She's pregnant, which is why she was acting like such a bitch (I'm still mad about it). But in the end I completely forgot about the milk. Now I'm freaking out because I stole the milk and I don't know if I should bring it back or not.

They might have been staring at me about the milk or just about my girlfriend and I. I just don't know what to do. I don't know if they'll look at me on the camera or try to prosecute me. Should I take the milk back, or will they think that I intentionally did this?

Or should I just take my free milk and forget about this. I just don't want to get prosecuted over some milk

Answer: Bring your girlfriend and the milk back to walmart, leave both of them there, problem solved.


Title: (TX) Was ticketed for impeding traffic causing a 3 car pile up

Question:
So, I was driving my friend's car, he is riding in the passenger seat, and we are heading to our friend's house. As we approach the U-turn we have to make to get to the house, I signal to turn and come to a stop as there is oncoming traffic in the other direction. As I stop, the car behind me (subaru outback) stops and gets rear ended and the car that rear ended him (some old 1988 car) also gets rear ended (by a newer looking SUV). Our car has not been hit and there is approximately a yard of space between our car and the subaru. We get out and see the subaru also had his blinker on as if he were trying to make the same turn as us. The man in the 88' vehicle was not wearing his seat belt and his airbags (if he even had them) did not deploy. He is struggling to breathe and a woman who was also in the subaru immediately tries to help him by propping him up until the police arrive. My friend calls the police. The man driving the subaru gets out and starts to yell about how I have "fucked up" his new car and tells me I stopped too quickly and he thinks there is a law against u-turns in the city we are in (we are in Richardson a suburb of Dallas and no there is no law against u-turns) and that I made a dangerous turn. The police, firemen, and ambulance show up. They take the guy into the ambulance on the stretcher, but do not drive him to the ER (there is talk that he was on a cell phone, but no one for sure knows). The police take everyone's statements. The police ask if any of the cars involved in the physical accident are able to be driven. Both men who were driving the SUVs that sandwiched the old 88' put up their hand and say they do not know if their cars are still working as they have not tried yet. My  friend and I can clearly see from the non-existent damage to both of their cars that they are both fine. The outback looked to need some minor body work on just the hatchback and the tail end SUV just had a few scratches on the front decal. The only car with serious damage was the 88' and the front was still fully intact but the trunk had bent down toward the wheel well. Thankfully the man who was in the 88' walked out of the ambulance just fine and went with the wrecker to wherever he took his car. I do not know what the other people received, but I received  citation for impeding traffic and have been asked to appear in court. The only problem is I have a flight back to Chicago where I am a college student in 5 days. Also thankfully, my friend who was with me in the car's father is a judge and has referred me to a ticket lawyer. When I first got out of the car to see what was going on I was mortified about what happened, looking back not a few hours later it seems a bit different. I am calling the lawyer in the morning and will contact the courthouse about the scheduling issues. If anyone has any advice it would be much appreciated and hopefully comforting.

tl;dr I go to make a u-turn and three cars rear end one another behind me. Everyone was fine and only one car had major damage. Our car was not even touched by the accident, but I was given a ticket for impeding traffic.

Answer: Some reason I feel like there's more to the story. Technically you didn't even have to remain on scene. You had nothing to do with the accident if your version is correct. You yielded during an unprotected turn, as the law states you have to. No cars made contact with you. You literally could have just pulled off as you were not involved..which makes me think there's more going on here.


Title: Got home from long trip to new tenants in apartment - MA

Question:
I'm sorry if this is short, they have my computer so I'm using my phone.

I went on a month and a half trip, starting mid June. I told my landlord about this in writing (email) and gave them permission to enter the apartment to do minor repairs. My lease is until mid September and I absolutely made no mention of moving out. I'm paid out through mid next month and supposedly the last month is already covered as I paid it up front with my deposit.

I arrived at my apartment (a studio in a small building) a bit over three hours ago to find the chain on the door preventing me from opening it even though my key worked. Almost immediately I heard screaming from the people inside since they thought I was breaking in. I said that it's my apartment which they denied... even though I could see my pc and they were drinking out of my cups. They claimed that they rented the apartment as fully furnished and that I needed to fuck off since it and its contents are theirs fair and square. I pointed out the computer only to find that they had basically trashed it since they couldn't unlock it. It's a custom built machine and definitely is (or was) my most valuable possession, I don't understand why they could possibly think it would be included as a furnishing. I also had tons of clothes in the closet and drawer (assumed trashed now) and the sheets on the bed are mine. I know this, it's a factory defect set I got on sale so the chances of them having their own is next to none.

I called the police who showed up surprisingly quickly, but the other people have a lease and recent mail for the address. I have no idea what they've been doing with my mail since the locked box was emptied.

Since we both have leases the police couldn't do anything tonight. I'm in a hotel. I'm not sure what the hell I can do. I'm concerned that now this is happening they'll sell off my stuff or otherwise be spiteful. Lots of the kitchenware are family heirlooms and can't be replaced, they have what's left of my pc, and all my furniture. I'm assuming the clothes and me-specific stuff is long gone already. I tried to grab some photos to show that they have my stuff but they shut the door when they saw so I only managed a couple blurry pics.

I can't get a hold of my landlord and my new place isn't available for another month and a half. Since these people have been there for a month I'm scared that they have to be formally evicted and I'll have nowhere to live for the next few weeks. All my stuff is basically gone, especially if they try to get rid of the unique things. All I have is the small amount of clothing I had for my trip.

**Edit 1:** Oh wow, thank you all for the advice! I was in full blown panic last night so I'm sorry I couldn't respond quickly. I'll try to answer questions here so everyone doesn't have to search! I apologize if anything is disjointed, I'm trying to cover as much as possible.

I still can't contact my landlord but I left messages both last night and this morning. A case has been opened with my insurance but they said not much can be done immediately because it's Sunday. I'm waiting on hearing from them before reaching out to a lawyer myself. I'm about to try the organizations suggested, hopefully they can help even more with specific information since I can't post everything here without being identified!

I do have a copy of the lease, it was all done online. I don't have the printed version though, it was in the apartment. When I moved in I paid 4x one month's rent: first month, last month, security deposit, and broker fee. I've always paid within a couple hours of rent being posted (it's an online system for all this landlord's property units) and have never missed any utilities, I know for sure this isn't from lack of payment. I had my passport with me since I was traveling outside the country so that's good!

The landlord responded to my email, they definitely received it and acknowledged the trip. I did get home early though, as someone mentioned. By about two weeks, it was originally a two month trip. Maybe they were renting the apartment as a really short term sublet and hoping I wouldn't find out? I'm a little hopeful that they might have put my clothing in storage if so...

I'm in a neighborhood of Boston, one of the more popular ones for students. People do sublet pretty often, after reading some of these comments maybe it isn't as weird to have so much of my stuff after all.

One thing did come up while checking out apartment details was that my electricity was off. I have autopay so I didn't even see the bill amount from last week, but if I had paid manually I (hopefully) would have noticed that my apartment was somehow using more power than usual. The only thing that should have been running was the fridge, everything else was entirely unplugged! The wifi is also still in my name and the password was on a sticky note. I imagine the new residents were told that the landlord was covering all utilities so that may also not be their fault. Same goes for the mail, they could have just thought it was a wrong address.

I guess what I'm thinking is maybe the new residents are just as much the victims here. Their aggressive reaction could easily just be the stress of having a stranger try to get in the apartment and then call the cops. That'd make me defensive!

I do have a possibly stupid follow up question. I'm spending the day making a list of the items I had in the apartment. Unfortunately my receipt box was in the unit so that doesn't help, thankfully most of my computer's parts were ordered online so I have that. The main question is, when deciding value does custom tailoring come into play at all? This morning I remembered that my bridesmaid dress for an upcoming wedding was in the closet. The dress itself is only a few hundred dollars (expensive but not crazy for weddings!) but it had a ton of custom work for sizing and neck line modifications. It'll be a pain to replace if I even can in time. Would it be worthwhile to try and contact the current residents to see if they kept any clothing? Or would that hurt my case?

Also, is it better to stay in a hotel while this is getting sorted out? I'm staying with a friend right now (didn't want to bother her so late last night) but again, I'm not sure if hotels are better because of the paper trail.

Not much has happened, tomorrow should have more progress!

Answer:
 I'm sorry about such a late update, I forgot the password for this account!

I finally got my landlord on the phone last afternoon. It turns out he thought I gave permission to sublet the apartment while I was gone. All our communication about the trip was over email and I said nothing of the sort. He's offering to refund me the rent for the two months but insists that the new tenants have priority since I got back earlier than expected. I refused the offer outright.

The good news is that my clothes are supposedly in storage. Bad news is he won't give them back until I move back in. I asked about my computer and he wants a warranty to prove it worked before I left, again saying it's my fault that I left it behind. There's no warranty because I built it and it's a chunky desktop so naturally I didn't travel with it l. Same goes for my furniture, kitchen supplies, bedding, and towels. Unless I can prove their state before I left he refuses to pay for any replacements or repairs.

What would be the next step here? It sounds like he doesn't want to compromise and the current tenants are just bystanders. At the very least I want my clothes back, but not if means he gets off the hook for repairs. I know the computer has damage and considering how messy the place was I imagine my other stuff is not in great shape either.

Edit: My insurance should cover some things but I can't get into the apartment to figure out what is damaged or missing. They told me that my policy doesn't cover legal matters like this, only replacing the furnishings.


Title: Had sexual interaction with someone who is denying to prove their age.

Question: I am a 24 gay male in Texas and recently met up with another male on Grindr. I picked him up and he looked my age so I never thought twice about it or bothered to ask about it. It was not known prior. After messing around and not having sex the subject of college came up and I learned that he "just graduated high school". I immediately shot up out of the bed got dressed and demanded he prove how old he is. He swears he is 18. He says "he doesn't have his ID" and "it's lost" so I drove him back to where I picked him up.   On the off chance that he is 17 that is fine in Texas but on the very slim chance for some reason he is 16 should I worry? There are no witnesses. Only texts. No mention of age prior. I can't even think or sleep at night because I don't know what to think. He is not cooperating through phone/text with me to prove his identity but he is still claiming he is 18.

Answer:
 >  He is not cooperating through phone/text with me to prove his identity but he is still claiming he is 18.

Stop barking up that tree. Do not contact him any further. Answer #2: I don't have legal advice, per se, but why don't you believe he is 18 if he says he just graduated high school? It would seem like the two things he said--that he's 18 and that he just graduated high school--are consistent, so I don't know why you are particularly suspicious. As you point out, the age of consent in Texas is 17. If he was in earnest that he just graduated high school, that makes it pretty unlikely that he's 16. However, were he to be under the age of 17, then it is statutory rape under Texas Penal Code § 22. 011. As you probably know, ignorance about a minor's age is not an affirmative defense to statutory rape. It's irrelevant as to the definition of the offense what age you thought he was. Now, establishing that, just as a practical matter, if a crime had been committed, there would need to be someone to report the crime before even getting into the matter of whether the burden of beyond a reasonable doubt would be met in trial. Even if he was 16, he doesn't seem like he's rushing to report you from what you've said.


Title: so my family's house is falling apart (literally) and I don't know what to do? ):

Question:
Hi, I don't really know how to describe this situation but I'm desperate to get out of my home.

I'm 17, I live with my mom and little sister. (in Ireland if that helps?) We live in an old famine house (yes, it's THAT OLD) and it is blessed with an abundance of rats, leaks, mould spots, damp, rotting wood, and everything else. 2 months ago a pipe burst in the attic and completely destroyed our living room and my bedroom. I tried blasting the radiator to dry things out but my schoolbooks and clothes are ruined (also my comics and books but in retrospect that's nothing moving on sorry-)

It's lashing rain here at the moment so the house is continuing to fill with water.... so more rot and damp.. yay...

OKAY NOW IMPORTANT DETAILS I'M SORRY FOR WHINING:

1. No financial support except for my mom who works once a week (150 euro total per week)
2. I'm doing my leaving cert (aka final exams that determine college places + the next 5-10 years of my life) so this situation is not ideal. I'm doing my best to get into college so I can support my family but then again I'm 2hrs+ away from the closest institute and don't have money for accommodation or travel so everything just feels hopeless...
3. We live in the ass end of the country so I wouldn't be able to get to work even if I got a job to help repair the house.

I know this is vague and stupid but I'm just wondering if there was any way to repair the house for a low cost. I would quit school to work full time if that is what it takes, I'm just sick of my little sister having to suffer because of a situation she was born into. I am aware social services would probably lose their lives if they saw the state of our living conditions but I love my family too much to be separated from them )): Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thank you so much.

&#x200B;

 **TL;DR** **My house is actually breaking apart in real time and my family are too poor to move, is there anything I can do?( apart from split apart from them)**

Answer: Have your parents applied for social welfare? If you’re as poor as you imply there’s a good chance they qualify for something.


Title: Live in downstairs apartment. Neighbor who weighs 250lbs+ (guesstimate) was running around her upstairs apartment. Photoframe of my military coins and awards fell down and shattered. Are they liable? [California]

Question:
I had a photo frame hanging on the wall with all my awards and coins from my time in the Army.  Recently, a new neighbor moved in.  One of the habitants (I assume minor, but could be 18, def a teenager) is a big girl.  She has a habit of running through her apartment which shakes my bottom floor.  Yesterday while running, my photo frame fell and completely shattered.

Is this something I could approach them to pay for?  If she is a minor, do I ask the parents?  If they refuse, is this something I could handle in civil court?

California

Answer:
 Unlikely. Moving about one's apartment is a normal use of the premises, and wouldn't reasonably be considered as likely to endanger the property of others. Your perception of her weight is immaterial, and frankly, it's pretty childish to focus on that.Answer #2: INAL, but I'm guessing no. What difference would there be between the fat girl and a large truck thundering by?  Or for that matter, what if you slammed your door hard enough to make it fall?

This is why you get renter's insurance.


Title: Questions about sexual harassment in workplace (Ohio)

Question:
On mobile, sorry!

I return to work next week after being on medical leave and my anxiety is through the roof. I cant think about anuyhing else. I realize its because of the way im treated and the culutural environment of my job. I work in male dominated industry (think car sales) for a multimillion $$ company that I've been with for almost a decade. Over time, I've put up with and allowed really disgusting behavior.

Here are some examples:

My direct manager has had pornographic dreams about me and on two occasions just HAD to describe them to me in detail. One occured when i was about 6 months pregnant, and he dreamt about my pregnant body. This same manager showed me freeze frame of a girl in porn video and said he thought about me when he watched it. The previous general manager would give me back rubs and put his hands on my neck when he'd visit my desk. Run his hands through my hair, real touchy feely guy. I've been asked what kind of porn i watch. If i shave my pubic hair. A manager once told me he wished he got to be the one who knocked me up. That same manager said he wanted to try my breastmilk "from the tap".

A couple problems i have:

Signed a forced arbitration agreement in the revised handbook that came out earlier this year

Some of the harassment came from employees no longer working there.

I dont have any of these occurrences in writing or recorded.

Asking for legal advice on what to do? Can i do anything? I dont like this knot in my stomach when i think about work.

Answer:
 >Asking for legal advice on what to do? Can i do anything? I dont like this knot in my stomach when i think about work

You should report this to HR, and if you don't think HR is taking it seriously you can escalate to the EEOC.

>I dont have any of these occurrences in writing or recorded.

In Ohio audio recording is legal with only one-party consent. FYI for the future.Answer #2: IANAL. Ohio is a one party state, if you're party to the conversation, record it. Don't wait 'til something is said, if you see them approaching you, click record. Answer #3: Have you reported this to HR?Answer #4: All of these things are disgusting and inappropriate and hopefully against company policy.  HR is your first stop though.

Violations of company policy is hopefully enough to cause action.

Generally speaking though they need to be told to stop.  For it to be harassment it has to be unwanted. They need to be told it is unwanted.  Flirty, dirty jokes, sexual innuendo etc by themselves could be against policy, are damaging to morale and inappropriate but in and of themselves are not actionable.


Title: [MI] Attempting to kick friends out of our home with no lease that have been staying with us for 2 months.

Question:
In June of this year, 2 friends of ours moved into our(my wife and mine) home in the basement after we agreed they could stay with us "for a few weeks"(their words) until they could find a new apartment. Their old apartment landlord chose to not renew their lease that ended at the end of May, and since they could not find a new apartment in time, we thought it would be okay to let them stay with us until a new place was found.

We did not ask them to sign a lease because of the "a few weeks" verbal agreement, and did not charge them rent or utilities so they could save money to put a down payment on a new apartment, and we even let them store their stuff in our garage while they're staying here so they dont have to pay for a storage unit. We also have helped them financially by putting a suit for their wedding on my wifes macy's credit card, so that they didnt have to spend an extra $300 all at once while trying to put a deposit on a new apartment. They both have jobs, while I am the only one that works between my wife and I because she has a chronic illness that prevents her from working, but she has yet to be approved for disability due to the rarity of her disease.

They have now been living with us for 2 months and have disrespected our home while staying here, for example using the fireplace in the basement at night while they slept while we had the air conditioning on "because they were cold". They have also been the typical terrible roomates in other ways, including only buying toilet paper once since living here(we've bought it several times and have asked them to buy more), leaving food and our dishes that we own in their bedroom for days and not cleaning up after themselves, their 2 cats have destroyed our curtains, window blinds, and a futon mattress, as well as have left poops in our bathroom sink on more than one occasion after their litter box is full and has yet to be changed. The last straw for us was when we woke up earlier this week to the entire house smelling like cat poop because one cat was left in a too small of a carrier overnight, and proceeded to shit everywhere inside of it. Instead of cleaning it, they put the cat in their bedroom and put the still shit filled carrier on our back porch and went back to bed, leaving it for my wife to find the carrier out there a few hours later with our whole newly stained deck covered in flies

What I want to know is since they did not sign a lease and we did agreed to not charge them anything, can we kick them out whenever we want, or do we have to give at least 30 days notice like a normal landlord/tennant relationship? We did verbally ask them to help us with water and electric bills after they had been with us for 1 month, but have so far only paid us for the water bill and it was in cash, so no record of a transaction taking place. Is there some sort of squatters law I should be aware of that would allow them to stay for longer? I have already purchased new locks for our house and garage, but before going any further, i want to make sure im not breaking any laws.

Is there some sort of resource I can reference that answers questions about tennant/landlord evictions in the event that their was no lease signed? We do own our home and property if that also makes a difference. We've also been trying to help them find a new place, searching craigslist and padmapper, and sending them new listings every day, but they either just ignore what we send them, apply but dont follow up, or the listings get pulled because someone else takes it before they even look at the listing(we can see if its been looked at or not, thank you facebook messenger). We also have reason to believe that one of them may have a warrant out for their arrest for a drinking and driving incident back in january, but we are not 100% positive and are not sure of how to find out.

Answer:
 Yeah , they're tenants. You have to give them notice and I have a feeling you are going to need to evict them when they don't leave when the notice is up.

Mi has multipule notice periods , you may be able to give 7 days notice if this is considered a "weekly" lease , then you have to give 7 or 30 days notice that you intend to evict. then court then 10 days to appeal then ask for an order of eviction.  I would consult  a MI attorney to help decide which notice periods are the right ones for you.


Title: Does this case have grounds?

Question: A friend called me immediately after she had been sexually assaulted. The assailant fled the scene and I called the cops on her behalf. A year later he has now been found not guilty but recently summoned me for a defamation suit. Does that guy have a case?  /USA - VA

Answer:
 Why is he claiming you defamed him? Because you called the police, or because you said something to someone?

If it is *exclusively* because you called the police, almost certainly not, but you still need to contact a lawyer to defend yourself and respond.


Title: (Los Angeles) thought it reasonable to charge me $490 for running a red light on a bicycle.

Question: Additionally, they seem to insist that I pay the fine before I contest the fine, which is draconian and kafkaesque.  This is an undue burden.  Any thoughts?

Answer: When you are on a bike you have to follow the same rules as cars. if you run a red light you will get a ticket. It is up to the city to set the amount of the ticket. Answer #2: Bicycles must follow the same rules of the road as a car. You cannot run a red on a bike anymore than in a car.


Title: I rented a 3 person unit in Oshawa with another dude in the hopes we'd find a third. We haven't, are we obligated to stay or can we just leave?

Question: We signed on as a group and it took us 3 months of not finding a roommate to just find a group of 3 and swap out of our lease. Since the rent amount of the third potential roommate has piled up, the landlord is telling us we need to pay that total if we want to leave the unit. The issue is that the other roomate won't pay at all. Do I have to pay the total myself or am I able to just leave? Oshawa, Canada btw.

Answer: You're both liable for it. If you end up paying the other share your will need to sue your roommate for the difference. Or the landlord can sue you and/or your roommate for outstanding rents if neither party pays


Title: Friend in the military, has recently been found guilty of a misdemeanor in another state

Question: [deleted]

Answer: If he has any kind of security clearance, they will 100% find out when it gets renewed, and he will likely be screwed if he didn't come forward and tell them first.Answer #2: they probably already know. it alone could cost the job or result in penalties, and lying or omitting will be worse. tell them (heck his little umcj rule book may even say he's required to).


Title: should i report my car stolen?

Question:
a couple of months ago my car broke down (whole other story that also ended up with the cops involved) and my fiancée’s father helped us find it and get it fixed. at the time, we were not able to afford the repairs and told him so. we told him that we would just scrap it or leave it but made sure he knew we were not going to be able to pay for it to be fixed. he wasn’t having it and ended up paying for a new motor himself and found someone he thought could put it in.
the vehicle ended up sitting at said persons house (probably about a month) as they were not able to put it in. so he found another family friend to put it in as well as fix other things wrong with it. again, we let him know we couldn’t afford it so we would just leave it sitting until we could save the money for it. he again said he would pay for it and we could pay him back. we let him know that our pay day was coming up and we would try to give him some of the money, but might not be able to depending on our bills as well as the paychecks themselves.

my fiancée ended up being out of work a couple weeks due to a shutdown that we told him about. so now it’s been probably two months and we haven’t paid him anything but we’ve explained why we could not. he tells us we owe HIM about $700 and to us he makes it seem like it’s been paid for by him and that’s who we owe the money for the repairs to. we say okay we’ll pay as we can. my fiancée went to look at the car that was now at her dads (this was in the last week/few days) and to get some personal belongings out of the car as well as take the battery (precaution due to who he lets come over to his house). he somehow didn’t know that we had two keys to my vehicle and this sets him off saying we were just going to take it and not pay him anything. then he starts verbally abusing my fiancée and threatening my vehicle if we don’t pay him the whole amount. by this point he had already told us we had a month to pay him. this entire time she had been the one the deal with him due to scheduling and such, plus it was her dad (i know it was my car but it just worked out that way). he ended up moving it from his house and the next day and when we asked about it he said it was “put up” and we’d see it when we “gave him his money”.

we’ve called the non emergency number and explained the situation and they tell us that it’s my car all in my name, he is not the mechanic or anything so he has no hold or claim to it. blah blah there was a verbal agreement between us about it but basically it’s a “civil matter”. i can take my car if i know where it is, seeing how i can’t steal my own property. so i text him about it. then there’s he fact that the “mechanics” were both family friends but he refuses to tell me where it is. i ended up talking to him and now he’s telling me that if i can pay the MECHANIC $250 dollars i can have my car back. tells me he isn’t worried about his money, just the mechanics. once more i try to explain our financial situation and payment plan and he seems to agree to it. tells me he called the mechanic to take it back because the mechanic thinks we won’t pay him.

since i’ve now been informed we owe the mechanic and not her father, i ask for the mechanic’s information. again this sets him off because we don’t take his word  and “what does it matter if we owe him or this man money” and now instead of a month we have two weeks to pay him the full $700 all at once. then i can have my car back. again i contact the police and explain and they give me the same spiel and i ask if i should report it stolen but they tell me it’s a civil matter and to file a civil suit.

as far as i know there are no receipts or anything. i’ve not written or signed anything agreeing to my car being fixed by these men. the only thing i’ve told him is through text and on the phone. we just now tried to get my car back because he started  in on us and threatening the car, but never once said we planned on not paying him. like i said he had agreed on the payment plan id explained two days ago but when i asked for the mechanics information decided that since i didn’t take his word we owed it to him all at once. tonight he constantly texted me while i was at work telling me he was going to rent my car out to someone and that actually they were driving it right now so if i wanted it i had ten minutes to get to the store this person drove my car to. i have not given permission to anybody to use my car, unless you count letting him take it to get fixed. he paid for it knowing our situation and he now refuses to tell me where it is.

i just don’t want to be doing wrong for reporting it stolen since i had previously contacted the police about the situation multiple times. i was told the civil suit would take a couple weeks and it also costs money we can’t really afford but i just have no clue what to do at this point.
Topic:
Other Civil Matters

Answer: I'll be as nice as possible about this. Your car was not stolen and the police have told you, multiple times now, not to report it as such since this is a civil issue about your failure to compensate him. Speak to a property attorney and stop trying to make this a police issue.


Title: How do I get medical providers to obey privacy and my (non-)consent? Apparently they think my disability means they can do whatever the hell they want.

Question:
Background:

* I am in Queensland Australia.
* I will soon be 34 years old
* I am female
* I am disabled physically and neurologically.
* I am completely mentally competent. (I have a masters degree in a STEM field as proof)
* Nobody has legal guardianship over me.
* I do not yet have a medical POA for disability accessibility reasons. It’s complicated and I’m working on it.
* I live with my family because I am currently too disabled to go through the process of move out.
* My medical team thinks my health will greatly improve once I finally live alone
* But GETTING me out on my own is too difficult right now.
* I have never lived alone.
* My family claim to be my carers but they are not.
* They do not provide adequate food or level of care.
* They keep most of the house wheelchair inaccessible on purpose.
* They do not qualify for the carer pension.
* They keep my wheelchair upstairs and they will only bring it to me if I ask nicely AND they approve of my outing.

(This all sucks but is a question for another day. Though if anyone wants to chuck a few resources my way I’d be grateful)

Onto the current stuff:

* Ridiculously frequently I am in medical situations where my privacy and/or consent is being violated.
* This happens every single visit, especially to a new providor
* I am treated like a child or like I am medically incompetent
* then my family is treated like the absolute experts on everything
* they are frequently allowed to consent to treatment, testing, etc FOR me
* even when I specifically say “I am aware of the risks and I am mentally competent and I do NOT consent”
* I am frequently told that I don’t NEED to consent because my family have consented FOR me.
* even happens when I explain that they are not my legal guardians and I am of sound mind and do not want them in the appointment with me.
* This even happens when my neurological problems are in remission and I appear to be "normal" (apart from the wheelchair).
* It seems to be the wheelchair itself that triggers this weird response in doctors, nurses, and admin staff
* advocating for myself makes it worse (some doctors get vindictive)
* I have been retaliated against for making complaints in the past.
* If my family  mistakenly gives incorrect medical info for me, they are always believed and I am not when I try to correct the situation
* Even though they know nothing about my disease and I am the one managing it full time.
* This can be dangerous (eg. allergy list).
* This happens even when I bring a printed and signed list by my other doctors.
* My main doctor believes my family is exhibiting signs of munchausens by proxy.
* she requests they not be allowed in to future medical appointments with me when she sends a referral but this is ignored every single time.
* I cannot just not bring my family to appointments because I can only leave the house when they are taking me somewhere, so they have to be there.
* I’ve been taken to hospital while saying that I do not consent just because my family lied and said I had a seizure. I didn’t.
* I was told that my family know my condition better than I do (false) and they have to take me in, consent or no.
* I was even told that since I couldn’t walk they could take me in without my consent (in case I injured my spine in a nonexistent seizure).
* I use a BLOODY WHEELCHAIR. Of COURSE I couldn’t walk for them to assess. Bloody hell.
* they still took me in without my consent after I pointed this out.
* frequently hospital staff/nurses/doctors bring in my family while I’ve said no and explained they are not my legal guardians and I am in my mid freaking 30s
* I am often then told “they still have a right to be here!!” and then they get brought in anyway.
* if I manage to keep my family out of the appointment/hospital/whatever, I am almost universally wheeled back out to my family and then the nurse or doctor then proceeds to give them a detailed summary of the whole appointment. Diagnosis, treatment, etc.
* this happens MORE when I specifically tell them not to and that they absolutely do NOT have permission to discuss even one single thing about today’s appointment with my family.
* I’m again frequently told that they have a “right” to know.
* Even more bizarrely, sometimes random strangers get treated this way because they happened to just be NEAR me in the waiting room when my family member nipped out to the loo! So now some random strangers know my private medical info.

My main doctor says most of this is illegal because I am mentally competent and not a minor.

So my main question is NOT how to report this (it doesn’t help), but how on EARTH do I bloody well STOP it happening in the moment?  I’ve been told it breaks so many medical consent and privacy laws, but every single place does it ALL the time.

Answer:
 Try r/auslaw or r/auslegal for Australia-specific advice.  All I can say is that I'm sorry you're in that situation.  It sounds infuriating.Answer #2: If your doctor or a hospital performs treatment on you in direct contravention of your consent - even if it's something as relatively minor as "don't draw blood" "okay here's your blood draw" - then you should immediately file a complaint with the [Office of the Health Ombudsman](http://www.oho.qld.gov.au/health-consumers/what-can-i-complain-about/).

In the interim, this is as much a boundaries issue as it is a legal issue. There are no simple solutions: if you assert your boundaries, your parents may withdraw support. Legal solutions need to start with figuring out how to get you in front of doctors without your family present, let alone speaking, and that's difficult. In principle, you have a right to privacy, and can withdraw from appointments and treatment if your care providers won't protect your privacy, but most of the useful remedies for this are after the fact.

However, if your parents are restricting you from leaving the house - for example by putting your wheelchair where you can't access it, or by rolling you back into the house against your will - you should also call the police.

You've largely covered the practical advice in one of your comments: you're already looking into charity and public welfare services to end your parents' involvement in your life. The only thing I'd add to this is to look for a local legal aid society or legal charity that works with disability issues: this is a _depressingly_ common problem, although your description sounds more severe than most cases.


Title: OH. Are there any restrictions on safe haven laws if the child is disabled?

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 NAL, but if the child is disabled it would be the right thing to do to actually talk to someone, like a fireman or nurse when dropping the infant off.  I believe that is required anyway.Answer #2: Since you're using the word "child" instead of "baby", I'll answer as question you didn't ask. Most safe haven laws do have time restrictions. For [Ohio](https://www.ohiobar.org/ForPublic/Resources/LawYouCanUse/Pages/LawYouCanUse-556.aspx):

> Ohio’s Safe Havens for Newborns law allows a birth parent to leave a newborn infant (30 days old or younger) at a “safe haven”


Title: UPDATE 2 Controlling wife

Question:
Here is the original post:
http://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/3giumy/my27m_wife30f_of_less_than_a_year_is_controlling/

The first update:
http://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/3ihspl/update_controlling_wife/

My wife [30F] has been controlling of me [27M] for some time.  I took advice and went to my own therapist to see if I had any cognitive distortions.  Therapist said I seemed understand of situation but I should read a book called Stop Walking on Eggshells.  It is a book about dealing with borderline personality disorder.  It was like ready stories about my own life.  I got very emotional as I realize this type of behavior rarely changes and can get worse.  At this same point in time last week, my car broke down.  My wife agreed to take me to work and bring me back home as my job pays for all our bills.  This is where I gained full perspective on my situation.

Shortly after dropping me off, she texts me saying she hates her life, is unhappy, and it's all my fault.  Which from the book is the very definition of borderline, as she follows it up with love you have a good day.  I say your happiness is your responsibility, take ownership of it.  This enraged her, to which the next text was well go find your own rides to work then.  I wait a couple hours to see if she changes her mind, nope.  She went to her parents and said find a ride.  I call my parents as they both get off work before I do and ask if they can help.  My loving parents say no problem, and you can borrow one of our cars for the weekend until my car is up and going again.  I have to take my mom to work the next morning so I stay at my parents.  My wife is texting me after my mom picks me up from work, asking when will I be home.  Is she serious?  She left me AT WORK with NO way to get home.  She says I better be home when she gets there.  I get some clothes, she has taken it upon herself to take all my xbox games and controllers while I was at work.  I get clothes, xbox, and everyday stuff I use and quickly pack it.  My mom and sister are with me to help as they had to come pick me up.  In total, it was 2 hr drive for my mom to drive from her house to my work, my work to my apartment, and my apartment back to my parents.  Mom isn't mad at me one bit, but my parents are fuming.  I don't say much, but go to bed and get ready for long work weekend.

I kept reading the book over the weekend, which my wife is once again telling me separate and divorce.  I kept contact to a minimum.  I know what I need to to do, but want to talk with my therapist before I say anything to my family.  Tell my therapist this story and she wasn't surprised.  I said from the book this was never going to change and she agreed.  I made the decision, I am going to leave my wife and get divorced.  I called a family meeting that night to inform everyone.  No one surprised but they said I have done everything a husband is suppose to do.  Very supportive and said I can sleep there as long as I needed too.  I opened up a separate checking account with minimum cash, but something to stash if she empties out our joint bank account.  I informed my closest friends, all very supportive and said need anything come to them.  It's relieving but I also know I should of seen these signs a long time ago.  Wife is telling me to wait to hear from her attorney, but not sure what steps I can do to protect myself either.  I live in Indiana, so if anyone has some advice feel free.  Borderline personality disorder is a very tricky thing to deal with.  The beginning of our relationship was amazing, and me being told how amazing and perfect I was. But the cracks showed up from time to time, but once married, it took full effect.  No one can live up to this disorders expectations, and it has drained me.  I am taking control of myself, bettering myself, and going to get through this.  Thanks everyone who has commented on previous posts, won't stick my dick in crazy as someone has suggested lol!

TL;DR Controlling wife has borderline personality disorder, blames me for everything, and I am taking control of my happiness by getting divorced.  This won't be easy and will be hell, but there is light at the end of my tunnel!

Edit: I will also add to this as this will be asked, she would not go to a therapist on her own.  I mentioned it several times over the last few months, but she always said I was the bad guy and I was the one with the problem.  I went to therapist and my therapist said I don't have any cognitive distortions.  I will keep going to therapy to help myself through this painful process.

Answer:
 Did you intend to update a /r/relationships post in /r/legaladvice?Answer #2: >Wife is telling me to wait to hear from her attorney, but not sure what steps I can do to protect myself either. I live in Indiana, so if anyone has some advice feel free.

Stop listening to your wife about anything.  Go find your own attorney and follow their advice.


Title: Censored nudes of girlfriend were posted to Facebook

Question: My girlfriend sent photos to a married individual months ago while he and his wife were separated. The wife found these photos and posted them to Facebook. These were censored with some black bars across her genitals and breast. I believe this to fall under revenge porn. Is this potentially prosecutable under Colorado law?

Answer: If the photos are censored, they're not porn. She can write to FB to have them taken down.


Title: [MI] University never processed my student loans and now I am SOL. They fully admitted this. What are my next steps?

Question:
Hi,

I was offered close to $6200 in student loans for this past semester, to accommodate a majority of my term balance. I accepted the student loan offered through my university, on April 1, but the loans never processed. The deadline to accept any of the awards was May 7, so I was well within my time period to accept these loans. I had contacted the Financial Aid office through email once and through phone **four** times asking what the delay was to process my loans because I can’t register for classes (I have proof of all of each phone call, cases I opened regarding this and email confirmation).

Each time, I was told the loan was processing because of my switch from an Undergraduate to Graduate student from this past Fall to Winter. On May 7, I was emailed saying my loans could not be processed anymore because the semester is over and basically to go find an alternative payment plan. I absolutely can’t cover the balance on my own and the private loan interest rates are astronomical. I don’t think I even have good enough credit to take out these private loans. And to be fair, I shouldn’t have to do this shit if I wasn’t at fault here. I met in person with Financial Aid where they blatantly told me this issue was on THEIR BEHALF and I did NOTHING wrong. They never switched my status to a Graduate student so the loans I have been trying to accept never processed because basically I was still an undergraduate student in the systems eyes. Again, they OPENLY ADMITTED THAT I DID NOT DO THIS and it was an error on their behalf. The person I spoke with verbally confirmed there was nothing I could have done at all to prevent this from happening. However, they said they will “try” to help recover some funds (I have email proof from the person today they will try to recover funds as documentation). but they legally can’t recover the full amount I accepted due to the fact that the semester is over.

Do I have any recourse here? What are my next steps? I have a hold on my academic account preventing me from obtaining unofficial transcripts and registering for classes. I 100% can not cover this full balance with my own personal funds. The university is in Detroit, Michigan and I am an in-state resident if this is any help. Thank you.

Answer: Does your school have an official with the word "Ombudsman" in their title?  If so, that's a good place to start.


Title: Girlfriends bank account emptied by ex's lawyer. Should she have been served papers? (ID)

Question: My girlfriend was ordered to pay legal fees from a previous court proceeding three years ago regarding custody in a previous marriage: she was advised not to pay by her lawyer due to the wording of the judgement.  Yesterday her checking and savings account was emptied by her ex's lawyer.  She's never received a bill of any kind or any communication.  The Idaho repository regarding the case shows that in September there was an affidavit of amount due  with a week later "Execution issued".  She was never served any papers.  I'm assuming she was improperly served.  Is this assumption correct and if there a paper trail we can access to see how the service supposedly happened?  This is devastating to our financials right now.

Answer:
 She had a judgement against her? If so, then likely what they did was proper. People whose bank accounts are about to be levied aren't sent notices. Because if they were they would just remove the funds from their account.

>  She's never received a bill of any kind or any communication.

but you said

> My girlfriend was ordered to pay legal fees from a previous court proceeding

So obviously this is something she was aware of and never took care of. Who was this order from?Answer #2: Sounds like she got her account garnished.  A judge would have authorized this.


Title: NEED LEGAL ADVICE: HOUSE SOLD WITH MULTIPLE VOILATIONS

Question: I purchased a house and after closing I found out it had multiple violations.  NO permits obtained for decks and carport.  Septic voilations.  What legal actions can I take towards the previous owners?  The knowingly and willing transferred these voilations without disclosing.  Any advice would be greatly appericated

Answer: Location matters, but in general home sales are as-is. For the previous owner to have liability you likely would need to prove that they knew and intentionally hid them. You or your inspector could have looked up their permits before the sale.


Title: [NYC] Never signed apartment lease renewal, gave notice and moved out. Can they withhold my security?

Question:
So we lived in an apartment in the UES for a year, got a lease renewal letter in the mail with a small increase in rent and security. I paid them, and paid the increased rent every month thereafter for 6 months, but never signed the letter or sent it back. In December we gave them 30 days notice that we were moving and vacated.

I've spoke to them a few times on the phone and they intend to exhaust my security (they took 3 months because my credit wasn't great, about ~$12,000) until its rented out but I don't even think they're advertising it and just intend on sitting on it for 3 months and taking all my security.

Everything I've read says that technically by not signing we went into a month-to-month lease, but she argues on the phone that because I paid the increased rent + security, I nonverbally agreed to the new lease.

Is she right?

Answer:
 Don’t take legal advice from your opposition. 12k is worth a visit to a real lawyer. Do that. You may be entitled to your fee back plus more.Answer #2: You need to check the lease you originally signed when you moved in. There should be a section in the lease detailing what happens in regards to lease renewals. That is what will determine you best course of action.

If you did not sign a new lease then more likely you transitioned to a month to month lease (IANAL and this is just generally what happens in most leases, could be different in your case). Google NYC's landlord/tenant laws to find the specific rules for your case, they are usually pretty easy to understand. After that you can either draw up and demand letter and file in small claims court, or speak to a lawyer to do the same or offer you more specific advice.


Title: Got caught stealing need advice !

Question: [deleted]

Answer: They'll find you. You're a minor, you have to get a lawyer or go with your parents to court. This is a small deal *if you handle this properly*. Get off the internet and tell your parents now kid.


Title: [New York] Released from a 1 year apartment lease with a Dr. note

Question:
We have been living in our apartment for 3 years. we have about 6 or 7 months left on our lease. My wife just gave birth to our daughter 4 months ago. She still isn't healed (bleeding), and her dr said it is most likely walking up and down the 3 flights of stairs into our apt. is causing her to not heal. Can a note stating the same for her dr get us out of our lease so we can find a place without stairs.
Topic:
Landlord Tenant Housing

Answer: No. You can get out of a lease if the apartment is unlivable or the landlord is in breach. A new medical condition of the tenants is not a legal reason to break a lease. Have you tried talking to the landlord about the issue to see if he/she will negotiate?


Title: [MA] "Thaaaat's a Bingo!" - Unemployment Questions

Question:
Hello Legaladvice,

&nbsp;

I frequent this sub, and love you guys - venturing into unknown territory and needing clarification on several UI questions.

&nbsp;

Back story:  I was notified by my employer at the end of May that the company I worked at for 3 1/2 years would be dissolving, and I would be laid off effective June 30th. After spending the month searching for a new job but not landing anything concrete, I filed for Unemployment this past Monday. When filing, I disclosed that my employer agreed to pay me out for my remaining vacation time, but I have yet to actually receive this. I also have not received my final paycheck, covering my last week of work.

It appears my employer may be treating this like I'm still on the payroll, and are waiting to pay me until the next natural pay date, which would be July 14th. However, I was under the impression that employees who are dismissed/laid off/terminated should receive their final paycheck on their last day.

&nbsp;

**Q1:** *Besides simply having to wait, are there any issues with my employer delaying my final payment?*

&nbsp;

**Q2:** *Could this payment be viewed as earned income for a future week (even though it is technically back pay for time already worked), and disqualify me from receiving benefits for a couple of weeks?*

&nbsp;

Here's where it gets interesting - wanting to take a break from the stress of this past week, I decided to play Bingo at the local Bingo Hall last night. I ended up hitting the Progressive Jackpot - and won $3000! Because I have been lucky enough to win this same Progressive Jackpot once before, I know for a fact that I will receive a W-2G on these winnings next year.

&nbsp;

**Q3:** *Do I report my Bingo winnings as income when I file for Unemployment next week?* I did a bit of digging and read that typically, gambling winnings are classified as "Unearned Income", though I can't find anything concrete that confirms that for Mass. The only option I have through Mass.gov's UI site is to list this money as "Other Income"; nothing else fits.

&nbsp;

**Q4:** *Will reporting these winnings as income disqualify me from receiving benefits?*

&nbsp;

**Q5:** *Will not reporting these winnings {through Unemployment} come back to bite me in the ass somehow?* I'd prefer to avoid that, for the most part.

&nbsp;

**Q6:** *Will this week still count as my waiting week if report that I received income?*

&nbsp;

Thanks for the time and the replies, I really appreciate it.

Answer:
 >I also have not received my final paycheck, covering my last week of work.

Full stop.  It's been more than a month since your last day, you're dealing with a company that is disbanding, and you are *still* waiting on wages?  Labor attorney, now.  You were owed all of your last day's wages on the day you were fired.  At the latest, you were owed money on the next regular pay period. The [wages include vacation time accrued](https://malegislature.gov/Laws/GeneralLaws/PartI/TitleXXI/Chapter149/Section148).  MA requires auto trebling of [damages for violations of this law](http://www.mbbp.com/news/treble-damages-requirement).  That means you're owed 3 times your pay, plus fees and costs.  **Do not screw around here or you're liable to wake up and realize you've got zero recourse and no hope of getting the money back**.

Q2: No, especially since you should have been paid the money a month or more ago.

Q3: N/A.

Q4: N/A.

Q5:  You mean on your taxes?  Absolutely, it's tax fraud.  For unemployment, who knows.  I'd error on the side of reporting.

Q6: You haven't  received anything, so I'm unsure how it would.


Title: Psychotic, alcogolic roommate

Question:
Hi everyone. I am a first year college student in PA at Penn State University, 18 years old, with a roommate from hell. She's 26 years old and an alcoholic. The first altercation I had with her was when she (drunkenly) entered my room and refused to leave. After 5 minutes of me yelling at her to get out, she swung and punched me in the face. Then, she tackled me to the ground, choked me out, pulled my hair, and kicked me. I have pictures of the black eye and scratch marks. Then, today, I got home from class and noticed my door was open. All the beer that she had bought for me to "apologize" for attacking me was gone, and I confronted her. Again, she swung first and hit me again, and again we fought.
I called my landlord and he's going to see what he can do about getting her out, but I was wondering if I can call the cops on her? Thanks

Answer: If someone attacks you, you call the police.


Title: [NY] My Son is Severely Autistic (non-verbal) Once He Turns 18 Can I Legally Take Him To Vote?

Answer: Think about it this way: if you take him to vote, is he going to be able to vote for the candidate that he feels could better run the country, or are you just going to tell him what to write?


Title: [New York] Brother died in accident; accident victim asking for $18,000

Question:
Hi All,

I'll keep this brief. My 22 year old brother passed away this past April in an accident when he ran a stop sign on his motorcycle and hit the side of a car already traveling on the road he was entering. The passengers were fine, but the car (a rental) was totaled as a result.

My brother had very little assets and very little debt. My mother had his car voluntarily repossessed to satisfy his outstanding car loan, and sent in a death certificate to have anything else cleared. He barely had $100 in his checking account, and what possessions we could sell (computer, Xbox, etc) would barely total $1000. My mother paid for his funeral out of pocket.

My brother did not have insurance on his motorcycle, and he was found at fault for the accident. The rental car company has sent a bill to the estate for $18,000. My mother met with a lawyer who told her to just forget about it and not worry, and to give him a call if the car company tried to sue her or the estate.

My question is, is this sound advice? My mother has not assumed legal ownership of his estate, but should we at least send a notice to the rental car company that the estate is insolvent?

Thanks all for your time!

Answer:
 If the estate is empty, there is nothing to sue for. They can't come after you or any other family members, as you did not cause the damage.

If the estate has any money in it, they can sue and win the amount that is left in the estate, whether that be $10, $100, or $18,000.

IANAL.Answer #2: Look up Fair Debt Collection Practices Act. You absolutely do not have to pay any of your brothers debts. Make sure your mother knows this and drill it into her brain. Debt collectors will call and try and convince her that she has a moral obligation to pay. She doesn't, you don't. Neither you or your mother owe anyone anything because of your brother's actions. Answer #3: You and your family are not responsible for any of your dead brother's debts. That doesn't mean debt collectors won't try to collect or get you to take on the debt. Answer #4: Send them a copy of the death certificate and tell them to go away. They may use some shady practices to try to get you to pay it. Do NOT pay it. Do NOT sign anything! No one else has to pay for your brother's debts. If his estate can't pay for it, no one else will.


Title: [OK] My highschool refuses to let me or my parents see my own grades.

Question: I forgot to pay a $25 fee to my public Oklahoma highschool, and during our last week of school, they shut down my online grades account  (both mine and my parents) And also forbid my teachers from giving me report cards until the fee is paid. I can get them the money of course, but it would take me a few days and I'm enraged that instead of simply reminding me to pay them they would disrupt my education like this. This is finals week, and we are getting about %20 of our total grade in each class. I'm very frustrated that I won't know what classes I need to get extra credit in, or what assignments I still need to turn in. I feel like this is a violation of my legal rights to an education. Does anyone know if this is legal?

Answer: It's legal, and fairly common. You'll get your grades eventually, but this is the lever they have to get you to pay your fines.


Title: (FL) I have jury duty on Monday but I'm sick.

Question:
I can't go to the doctor to get an note(no health insurance). Can I call and explain that I'm sick(rotavirus)or do I have to drag myself in there? If I have to go can I get in trouble if I vomit in the court room?

Edit:Tuesday not Monday.

Answer: Call the jury staff at the courthouse you are supposed to report to.  Ask for a deferral and a new date.  You probably won't get this chance again, so make sure you can attend whatever date they give you.


Title: We Want the court ordered child support obligation to end

Question:
A short Story for a little context:

Me and My Ex separated about 10 years ago during this period we BOTH needed government assistance IE: Food Stamps and I was forced to move back to my homestead several months later which is a completely different state. A child support order was mandated when my son was born due to the poor financial circumstances my ex was in. I didn't have an official job at the time so I owe arrears upwards of $6,000 And have been trying to pay them down along with my current obligation. I am also putting towards (and this isn't legally required) his future college education of choice.

We are BOTH in much better places than we were 10 years ago. She is happily married, I am engaged, I visit my son periodically (When i can afford to) and I am in constant contact either by phone or by way of online gaming. The obligation is asking that I pay for medical support through my employer which is fine, but the medical insurance isn't going to be used in his state and he is under his mother's husband's plan.

&#x200B;

On to the meet of the subject:

I currently live in the state of Florida, she with my son, currently lives in the state of Oregon both inside the country USA.

We do not want the state involved in the financial decision we make regarding our son anymore. This was mostly her IDEA btw just to point it out here. It's a headache. While i do plan to move closer eventually, right now its difficult to deal with the court system because of how far apart we live.

I understand i would still owe the arrears, which is fine, and I still plan to pay for whatever it is he needs. I have periodically exceeded the child support amount because of this.

Failing the idea that the court stay out of it. Would there be away to remove the medical obligation? As it's redundant and pointless at the moment.

&#x200B;

I appreciate all advice!

Answer: you can't change a court order without going to court. so you'll have to go back to court in the state the order was made to modify it


Title: Is it legal to block the road with “kids at play” signs?

Question: I’ve had enough. Every damn day these people on my street put their stupid “kids at play” signs in the middle of the road. And it’s not like I can go around them, they are lined up like a barricade from right side of the street to the left. They also don’t care to take them down even when their kids aren’t outside. So everyday I have to get out of my car and move those damn signs, then they kid pissed at ME for moving them! There’s gotta be a way to get them to stop because they don’t listen to me. So I’m asking, is it legal to do this on a residential road? Can I report them?

Answer: No, they cannot obstruct traffic with signs in the middle of the road. Call the non-emergency police when this happens.


Title: Alberta, Canada. Male. 2 kids. Judge ordered to disclose financial information.

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 You'll be held in contempt, fined or jailed, and your employer or bank may be ordered to cough up the information anyway.

Being held in contempt is not a good way to start with a judge.