Title: How do I deal with CRUEL feedback at work? What are my legal options?

Question:
Another Reddit group [**r/socialwork**](https://www.reddit.com/r/socialwork/) recommended I ask you all for legal advice...

TL;DR: I received feedback from a supervisor in the form of a list of quotes/complaints from my coworkers. Now I don't trust anyone, am experiencing a hostile work environment, and want to quit. Help.

A little backstory: the place I work for is having a lot of trouble currently. As such, I have heard many complaints about the work conditions, hours, and lack of good pay. While it's not my job to, I've listened to people vent these complaints, because I care about them and I consider the people I work with my friends (I've also been labeled a good listener all my life). After listening for a couple of months, I took the risk of going to the president of the company (it's a very small company) and reporting what "the people on the ground" were feeling. The president was thankful to know the truth because when they generally ask how someone is doing, that person will be polite and say everything's fine. I felt it did our president a disservice to not know the reality of what they were the president of. I also acknowledged that I was afraid my decision to go to the top would get me fired or in trouble, and they assured me that would not happen.

Fast forward to this week, I believe I've experiencing a form of retaliation or intimidation. I was called into a meeting with my manager and my supervisor. I was handed 3 pages with a Performance Improvement Plan that included quotes that people said about me, complaints that people had about me. Supposedly, they were "unsolicited feedback by individual staff members" and were listed anonymously. I was accused of having lack of respect for my co-workers and supervisors and engaging in unproductive triangulation among staff members. The quotes implied (and sometimes outright stated) that I was a gossip and trying to "start something" when having conversations (though mostly listening and sympathizing) with people who were venting. Until this point, I had never heard anything about these complaints. While I know I am great at my job and am widely admired by staff and customers alike, there were no positive remarks on this handout.

When I began to explain to my supervisor that I was frustrated to hear these remarks because they were inaccurate of my actions, it was clear that my supervisor was much more interested in talking about how my actions are perceived than what they really were. Much of the conversation was based on the importance of perception rather than fact. Because my coworkers thought I was gossiping and thought I was trying to "start something," it meant I was. In addition, I wasn't able to express myself or advocate for myself much because my supervisor was quick to cut me off and explain why I was wrong. It wasn't a conversation as much as it was a judge's reading of charges.

After understanding that my supervisor had no interest in what I had to say, I asked to leave. By this point, I was already sobbing. As much as I would like to say I was able to sit in that meeting and read those words without crying, I cannot. Those quotes broke my trust with every single employee of the company I worked with and immediately dissolved the friendships I had formed. Because they were listed anonymously, I wasn't able to know exactly which of my coworkers thought what about me. For many of the quotes, I was able to figure out who said them based on context. The most painful discovery may have been that one of the complaints came from my manager, who was also my greatest friend on my team and who I had recently entrusted to care for my pets when I was out of town. She never said anything nor gave me any warning or guidance of how I could improve from my supposed bad behavior. My manager stayed quiet for most of this meeting, only giving small remarks to show agreement with our supervisor.

This list of quotes and complaints showed me what my coworkers and managers thought of me. It felt like being in high school again. Like seeing a bunch of horrible things people had to say about you in the Burn Book from Mean Girls or on the stalls of the bathroom. It felt nothing short of cruel.

My supervisor hasn't spoken to me in three days though there has been plenty of opportunity. I've done my work pretty quietly and kept to myself. It's amazing how much work you can get done when you no longer have any friends. I'm strongly considering quitting and moving on, a decision that breaks my heart further as I love what I do.

Reddit, this is my first time here, and I'm desperately asking for help. People I've consulted so far have remarked that this form of "feedback" was unprofessional, heartless, and a sign of poor management skills. I have no idea what to do, how to respond, or how to move forward. I no longer trust any of my coworkers and I feel like I'm in a somewhat hostile work environment. I've basically shutdown. Am I justified in feeling this way? What would you recommend I do? Has anyone else ever received feedback in form of coworker's quotes/complaints?

Thank you very much in advance for your courtesy and honesty.

EDIT: no union, no HR, no one to actually talk to or file a complaint to (except maybe back to the President). I don’t know if I have enough to get a lawyer involved.  I also don’t think it’d qualify as harassment, and I don’t know if I’d be protected from this form of retaliation, due to it not being related to protected classes (race, gender, religion, etc.). I don’t think the law is on my side here and I don’t think there’s really any way to hold my supervisor accountable for their behavior.

Answer:
 > People I've consulted so far have remarked that this form of "feedback" was unprofessional, heartless, and a sign of poor management skills

Perhaps.  But it's not illegal.  It's perfectly fine for your coworkers to dislike you, and to tell you about it. Answer #2: A hostile work environment would involve a form of discrimination. It sounds like what is happening at your office is you got feedback and didn't like it. If you don't like the management style you can quit, but that's not really a legal issue. Answer #3: You can find another job. Answer #4: You were given honest feedback. Deal with it as a professional. You're acting like a child. Perception is just as, if not more, important than what you see as the truth in these situations. There is no legal issue.

I personally find how you behaved by going to the top inappropriate and in line with the feedback given to you. I can't stand working with people who act like you did. Answer #5: It's profession feedback, not personal feedback.  Don't take it personally.Answer #6: Food for thought here - maybe you really are provoking issues by allowing people to vent to you. Perhaps having those conversations actually does allow your coworkers to escalate issues into bigger problems.
I’m not saying this is how it should be handled but what’s done is done.
If you don’t want to leave then you could accept the feedback, convey that to management and explain that it will not happen again, and then get on with working.
Now, this isn’t legal advice. Just advice on how to deal with the situation professionally.


Title: Can I be my little brother's legal guardian along with our biological parents?

Question: This is in Oregon.

Answer: Why would you want to be his legal guardian? For medical emergencies or after your parents' death?


Title: CA Bought a Ford Fusion new that is now 2 years old w/60k miles and lots of things wrong with it (recalls, etc.). It's out of lemon law range. Do I have any other recourse to force Ford to buy it back?

Question: I bought a 2014 Ford Fusion SE new about 2.5 years ago.  Since then, there have been a lot of recalls and now the brakes (front and back) are going long before they're supposed to.  I'm hating this car and just want to get rid of it.  Since it's outside of CA lemon law range, is there anything else I can do to make Ford buy it back or replace it?

Answer:
 60k miles is about the norm for the brake system it's part of the general maintenance of owning a vehicle.  If they're complying and fixing the recalls you have nothing to stand on.Answer #2: Ford should fix whatever recalls you have.

As for the brakes, that is just normal wear and tear on a vehicle.


Title: I was offered a full time job to replace someone leaving the job, then the offer was rescinded when they decided they didn't want to retire after all.

Question:
I'm a professional organist, specializing in classical organ repertoire and church music. Having recently completed my master's degree in organ performance, I've been looking for a full-time organist position pretty much anywhere in the US (yes, they do exist!).

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My wife is from Florida and has had a long history with an Episcopal Church down there. The current Organist and Choirmaster has mentioned that they were thinking about retiring for years and that she would like me to take their place.

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At the beginning of March of this year, we visited the church, my wife sang in the choir that Sunday, and I played some instrumental organ music. That Monday, the current Organist took us out to lunch and said, "I have a retirement date and have told the Rector (the head-priest). My last day is to be August 31, and I'd like you to take my place." We were thrilled--it's a prestigious position and my wife's family lives about 13 minutes from the church and we have a newborn baby. Now, this probably seems weird that they wouldn't post the job or do a national search, but the current organist has spent 45+ years building this program and wanted to make sure it was left in the right hands. It also wouldn't be the first time a large church like this made a hiring decision such as this behind closed doors.

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Over the following months I was in talks with the Rector via phone and email. He ended up offering me an Interim position for one year with the chance to get the permanent position once that year had expired. At the same time, I also got another job offer from a church in another state, and my gut told me to go with them, but it was less prestigious, less money, and not close to any family. So, I accepted the prestigious job and told the other place that while I loved meeting them and everything, I needed to go with Florida. They were very understanding.

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On May 10, the last email I received from the Rector said (summary): "Your background check came back clean, as I'm sure you knew it would. My Business Manager will work on your Letter of Agreement and send it out next week. I am very much looking forward to your being here."

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Yesterday afternoon, May 16, I got a call from the Organist saying, "Something blew up last week and I have decided not to retire. I'm so sorry."

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Lots of phone calls were made after that, including to their Rector, who said that he's sorry this is the way it turned out, but he was hoping that the Organist and I would be able to work it out on our own since we are friends.

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My current job has already started their search process to find my replacement, and while they said I can stay as long as I like, it's rippling out because people who they have offered jobs to now have to go back to THEIR employers who they just gave notice to.

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Am I entitled to some sort of settlement? Is this a breach of contract despite never actually getting a signed Letter of Agreement?

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Thanks for the help and happy to clear up any details.
Topic:
Contracts

Answer:
 Did you sign anything saying you were going to work there? If you didn’t I don’t think there’s much you can doAnswer #2: Promissory estoppel is the legal term you're looking for here.

However, I don't believe it will apply as you aren't under much detriment. Most who are awarded promissory estoppel are those who already left their former job (and can't get it back), and have typically moved somewhere for the new opportunity (losing housing where they previously came from). You have the below:

> My current job has already started their search process to find my replacement, and while **they said I can stay as long as I like**

So you didn't even actually lose your current job, therefore no damages to sue for.Answer #3: Even a written job offer being rescinded is not particularly actionable. I don't think you'll have much luck in this case, though you can talk to a lawyer. If you moved your family to a new city for a job that was rescinded, maybe, but you have not really experienced a compensable loss. Just bad luck.


Title: Anti-Vax parents pulling siblings out of school

Question:
Hi- throwaway account, X-post r/relationship_advice

I [27F] have several younger siblings [16M], [14F], [11F] who recently moved to NY state. My father and step mother [50s] are anti-vaxxers. My siblings attend public school with “religious exemption” from vaccines. However, there is possible legislation going into effect in NY that would no longer allow this exemption.

My parents are discussing home schooling my siblings instead of vaccinating them and sending them to school next year. I think this is a terrible idea because they live in the middle of nowhere, and school is the only place for my siblings to socialize with other people. Additionally, I’m a teacher, and I don’t think my parents will be able to provide adequate education to my siblings. (They believe in “unschooling,” and that traditional schools are just brain washing facilities).

Is there anything I can do? Are there any loop holes that would allow my siblings to get vaccinated against our parents will? I’m not against taking them to the doctor myself, however, I don’t know that that would stop my parents from homeschooling them. I fear for my siblings safety and well being!

Answer: Whose children are they? (Who is their legal guardian?)


Title: California: Landlord removed personal property prior to lease end date

Question:
Girlfriend had lease for apartment until 08/31, she has another lease with the same landlord for a different apartment in the same complex starting on 09/01.
After leaving on the weekend and coming back on 09/30 to empty the apartment before the lease ended we found the door open and all my girlfriend's belongings removed. Neighbor said it had all been thrown in a dumpster on 08/28.
Landlord said one of the roommates claimed all the tenants had moved out, however that was not the case as my girlfriend still lived there. The landlord made no attempt to contact my girlfriend prior or after entering the apartment or removing all her property. Moreover, they were aware of our intention of remaining there until the end of the lease, so as to move in to the new apartment straight away.
Landlord offered to reimburse the value of the belongings however we do not know how much to accept. We provided a list of belongings adding up to roughly 10.5K in value. However this is not comprehensive nor an accurate representation of what was lost. Just, as we explained to them, "a rough guideline"

Among the stuff removed were furniture, clothing, cash, items of sentimental value, as well as a variety of personal documents.

Landlord said they will make an offer of an amount to reimburse tomorrow.
How much should we accept? Should we accept anything at all yet, or wait until we can see a lawyer as we have been unable to yet.

I greatly appreciate any advice
Topic:
Landlord Tenant Housing

Answer:
 Even abandoned property has to be held in California for 18 days. The landlord has to notify you where to pick it up. And then it can't be thrown away but has to be sold if it has any value, and the proceeds returned to the tenant once damages are deducted. Your landlord is completely legally liable for the whole amount. I'd go after them for punitive damages too. Hell, I had a tenant who I evicted who left a bunch of worthless shit behind, and I stored that stuff for a month to cover my ass. Your landlord is absolutely evil.

http://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/handling-tenants-abandoned-property-legal-notice-requirements.html
Answer #2: Talk to the former roommates and make sure they weren't the ones who threw it all out. That would really change things. Also find out why they told the landlord she wasn't coming back.Answer #3: Just making sure you see this - as OneRedSent said, if you have renter's insurance, that's what it's for. Collect from them and have them go after your landlord - that makes things far simpler for you.

Also, your renter's insurance company will likely have reasonable policies for how much to reimburse you.


Title: Am I legally bound to report, to the IRS, the money earned from online English teaching services?

Question:
For example I have been working with a company called Palfish that is 100% based in China and we have to use a 3rd party in order to get paid (Payoneer) they pay us in RMB and Payoneer converts it to USD.

They have not given me (or anyone I know of) a W-9 form to fill out. But people keep saying something about using a 1099 form for taxes when the times comes...

The thing is a 1099 can't be filled out without a W-9 and why would a company in China give me, a citizen of the USA, a W-9 in the first place?

I'm wondering if this is one of those sort of situations where the money earned can be look at like how a waiter is given tips and we all know most waiters don't report 100% of the tips earned.

**My question is do I have to report and pay US taxes on this money I am making from Palfish?**

Yes I understand it does sound morally wrong to not report all of these wages to the IRS, but in this case it seems I don't even have to do it so why bother.. especially since the taxes on this sort of pay is upwards of 50(?)%

Answer:
 Yes. You are legally bound to report the income. You don't need a 1099.

The taxes aren't going to be 50% unless you are making 120k or so, doubt that's the case here.


Title: Landlord gas bill from old tenant????

Question: So I moved into my new apartment last august. It was a hectic move and was very busy and working 70 hours a week. I thought I followed all protocol as best I could. I received a call from my landlord last month saying I never put the gas bill in my name. I called the gas company and got it all figured out. Today march 4th of 2017 I received a letter from my land lord with 6 months of bills from my gas company in the last tenants name. Stating that I need to write a check payable to her(the old tenant) for all the months bills. What is my next action? Why didn't she say anything the first month when she got her bill sent to her?? Do I have to pay her??stl,mo

Answer: You pay for the gas you used. Is this actually your question? You don't get free gas. That would be such a dick move not to pay her.


Title: Is it illegal in the USA to name your wifi a bad word?

Answer: Mine is named "DEA Mobile Unit". I wanted my drug addict neighbors to think twice about life.Answer #2: No, but I can think of a few names that would get you a visit from the FBI.


Title: Cant afford child support because of a situation the other parent has left me to deal with

Question: So as the title suggests the other parent has put me in a rough spot. They recently got a DUI with the child in the car and they are under the legal drinking age so their licence has been suspended. This leaves me in the position to have to do all the driving, I'm currently working on getting at least 50% custody to maybe alleviate myself from spending so much on gas. Currently I work early mornings(3am- about 9am) this is so I can make the rest of my day dedicated to watching my son while they are at work but the other parent insists on having him home every night and having me get him every morning so currently I have him most of the time so I'm thinking maybe that means I should pay less in child support I know I need to talk to the child support aggency or a judge but I'm hoping I could get some tips and advice from you guys first so I don't go in empty-handed. Thank you in advance and sorry if the post isn't very informative ask any questions if needed.

Answer:
 The court needs to re-examine your case if the other parent has received a DUI with the child IN the car! I’d have that person’s nuts (tits) nailed to a wall for endangering my child...Answer #2: Do you have a court ordered custody plan and/or chold support?Answer #3: IIRC child support is based on how many nights the child spends with each parent. You need more nights with your child to reduce the support you payAnswer #4: NAL, but my husband was doing all the driving because his ex had a "medical condition" that prevented her from driving so far. When my husband took her back to court, the judge ordered that she had to pay him half of the gas money if she wasn't willing to drive. We're in WI.Answer #5: You didn't state where you are from.  I know in Florida, child support is based on a rather complex formula based on the income of both parties as well as the amount of time each party spends with the child(ren).  In Tennessee, it's a straight percentage of the non custodial parent's income.

With regards to the DUI, this simple fact can very well be used against the other party to justify a change in custody.

On both of these issues, I highly recommend that you retain the services of an attorney who is very experienced in family law.


Title: Texas. Landlord wants us to pay water bill from before we moved in.

Question:
I've lurked here almost everyday never thinking I would make a post here.  Ok, yesterday the city turned off the water on us so we called the landlord because we had an arrangement where they would give us the water bill and we pay our part with the rent.  We moved two in two months ago and so naturally we payed a total of two months of rent.  We never got a water bill nor a copy of it nor did the landlord ever brought it up.

The landlord called the water company and they told her that she was two months behind and the total amount is about $100.  They told her that they needed at least $75 to turn the water back on.

First they asked us if we can pay that amount because they didn't have the money to pay for it.  We explained that we didn't have that much to spend either until the beginning of next month.  We decided to call the water company ourselves and found out they bill a month behind.  We moved in two months ago which means it was July.

The water company explained that the part that was overdue was from June and the one from July was just late.  They do a $30 re-connection fee which is why it's so much.  Our part is just $18 plus a $5 late fee.  They also noted that they send the letter to landlords house, which would be important later.

Now that all this is out of the way.  The landlord said that they would pay the whole thing and we'll just pay our part on the day of the rent.  This keeps changing.  Today they called saying they paid it and that the company said that they sent the letter to the house we're renting.  It's a small lie but I just can't stand that.  They said that we would need to pay our part plus the re-connection fee.  However, the part that was overdue was before we moved in which is the reason the water company shut off the water.

So it goes like this:
June water bill > overdue > July water bill late > August Hasn't came yet.

So, they kept calling saying they paid the whole bill that we should pay our part plus the re-connection fee but they decided to accept half.  Later on they came with a receipt again asking us for the whole re-connection fee when they should have gotten the bill and asked for our part and for them to pay their prior tenants part, which has nothing to do with us, on time.

My question, after a long rant, is what can we do in our situation to make it civil but firm that we can't pay the re-connection fee when our part wasn't overdue and it was before we moved in.

Sorry if some parts don't make sense.  I'm a bit emotional so please ask about anything to make myself clearer.
Topic:
Landlord Tenant Housing

Answer:
 Respond to them in writing so you have a copy. Detail the total bill and what part you are responsible for. Tell them you will include the cost of July utilities with your Sept 1st rent payment. (edit.. oops, not 21st)

They may try to cause trouble, artificially inflate other costs, or simply file for eviction in retaliation, so try to keep it civil. You are going to be dealing with them for a long time after all.


Title: [TEXAS] Moved out of apartment early, leasing office threw away items we left behind to clean with

Question:
Hi there,

As the title says, my wife and I moved out of our apartment in Arlington, TX, 6/12/2016 and our lease extends until 7/4/2016. We have fully paid rent for June and will pay rent for the 4 days in July. We left behind a vacuum, a carpet cleaning machine and cleaning supplies with the intent of going back and cleaning before the lease was up.

I sent an email to management 6/13/2016 stating that we've left and asking how to handle July rent and what they expected to see in order to return the full security deposit to us. I went over to the apartment yesterday, 6/19/2016, to find that painters had already come in and management had removed our cleaning supplies. I was able to grab one trash bag of cleaning chemicals and the cable boxes (misc small stuff).

I called today, and the leasing agent said that she spoke to maintenance and our vacuums were thrown away. They threw away a small Ridgid Shop Vac (~$50) and a Hoover carpet cleaner ($120), both less than 6 months old.

The manager is stating that the email I sent is considered "relinquishing control" and that they acted in accordance with their policy. We still haven't given them the keys or garage door/gate openers. The total loss at this point is small, but I'd like to know my options.

edit: here is the email I sent  http://imgur.com/b4Rxx7t
Any help is greatly appreciated!

Answer: To take a contrary stance to the other posters and I'll definitely be fact checking later today but I just finished reading the Texas property code over my own dispute and of you've already laid this month's rent they can't legally interpret your property as abandoned and you in no way surrendered it to them and if I'm reading right your email left it plain that you were coming back to clean and interested in retrieving your deposit. They erred here. A bit of digging through the property codes and I can find you a citation.


Title: 18 USC 842(p)(2) makes sharing information a felony. How is that constitutional?

Question:
[18 USC 842](https://www.law.cornell.edu/uscode/text/18/842) (p)(2) makes it a felony to teach somebody to make an explosive device, or share information pertaining to making explosives, with the intent that that information be used illegally.

A) Is there any similar prohibition when it comes to any other potential crime? Is it illegal to tell somebody how to rob a bank, or stab somebody to death, or counterfeit money?

2) If they were sharing the information with the intent that it be used illegally, wouldn't they be guilty of conspiracy anyway?

iii.) How can such a law be constitutional?

The text of the law in question:

>(2)Prohibition.—It shall be unlawful for any person—

>(A) to teach or demonstrate the making or use of an explosive, a destructive device, or a weapon of mass destruction, or to distribute by any means information pertaining to, in whole or in part, the manufacture or use of an explosive, destructive device, or weapon of mass destruction, with the intent that the teaching, demonstration, or information be used for, or in furtherance of, an activity that constitutes a Federal crime of violence; or

>(B) to teach or demonstrate to any person the making or use of an explosive, a destructive device, or a weapon of mass destruction, or to distribute to any person, by any means, information pertaining to, in whole or in part, the manufacture or use of an explosive, destructive device, or weapon of mass destruction, knowing that such person intends to use the teaching, demonstration, or information for, or in furtherance of, an activity that constitutes a Federal crime of violence.

Answer:
 > Is it illegal to tell somebody how to rob a bank, or stab somebody to death, or counterfeit money?

Yes, yes and yes, in the general case.  It is illegal to participate in a crime, either the execution, the coverup, or the setup.  The important part here is knowledge and intent - does the party know and intend that their activity be part of the crime?

This is true even in the statute you cited.  It's illegal to teach someone how to make explosives, but only for, or in furtherance of, a crime of violence.  It's not illegal to do in general.

Answer #2: Arguably, even without that statute, teaching someone to rob a bank, *knowing* that they're going to rob a bank with this knowledge, can make you guilty of conspiracy to rob the bank that they rob, even if you didn't know which one it would be.


Title: (Pennsylvania) A friend stole marijuana from his drug dealer friend and the dealer found out.

Question: The question is whether or not the dealer can go to the police without incriminating himself. The dealer is threatening to call the police in hopes of getting my friend to pay him money for the lost goods. My friend walked in the house, broke a latch lock off of the bedroom door and took some pot. After being accused by the dealer my friend admitted via text he had taken some stuff and apologized. There are also many texts on my friends phone about purchasing marijuana from the dealer. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Answer:
 Most likely both of them will go to jail if it is reported to the police. Tell your friend that other drug dealers would most likely murder him for stealing drugs. Answer #2: Yes, the dealer can go to the police, as your friend committed at least some theft-related crime(s). The police can charge your friend, and your friend can be convicted.

From the dealer's perspective, it is probably not a smart move. It could lead to the dealer being arrested/convicted on any number of charges. Obviously, the dealer wouldn't have the pot returned to him if the police ever found it.

When stealing from drug dealers, it is probably reasonable to be more concerned with getting killed than getting arrested.


Title: Shipping weed (fedex or USPS)

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 The federal government and its laws have jurisdiction over the United States postal system. That means in each of your scenarios, you are looking at being subject to federal laws regarding the possession and distribution of an illegal drug, which are felonies, and possibly applicable state laws as well. Answer #2: You want legal advice?

Don't do it, it's a felony.

You want practical advice?

Have whoever is on the other side find a local supplier.


Title: [ON]Is my painting violating any copyright laws?

Question:
[ON] This is my first post, so I hope I did this right.
I am working on a painting that has Mars terrain in the background, however, I am worried about issues with copyright. The background I am painting is of a picture taken by a European space agency (DLR). My hopes are to try and sell the painting after it is completed, but now worry if it might violate the copyright.
Most of the background will be covered, but I’m sure the picture that was used could be identified.
Any advice would be much appreciated!

Answer: I am also not a lawyer but if I've understood the [DLR copyright statement](http://www.dlr.de/gfr/en/desktopdefault.aspx/tabid-5180/) correctly then you are in the clear, provided you credit it properly. There's a description of what you need to do in that link as well as a way to contact the DLR if you have any questions.


Title: I bought a cat which I didn't know was sick, and paid more than the agreed amount, plus incurred vet expenses. Do I have any options to get some money back or shut down an unlicensed business/breeder? (Alberta, Canada)

Question:
Hello r/legaladvice, I live in Alberta, Canada and I am looking for some advice on a situation involving my new pet. I am posting for the first time ever on Reddit and I am on my phone so hopefully there won't be too many formatting errors, but if there are I sincerely apologize.

I bought a cat from my former beauty (lash) technician, who also breeds cats. We had verbally agreed on $400 (it is a purebred kitten) and a date to pick up the kitten (December 21, 2017). When December 21st came around, the lady said that she had taken them to the vet and the vet had said they were underweight and therefore she wanted to keep the kitten longer. I believed that was the smart thing to do, both for the kitten and for me, financially.

On January 2 I came to pick up the kitten as she said she was ready to go. When I got to her house, she upped the price by $200, and since I had already paid my $250 deposit and bought some cat supplies, and honestly was incredibly shocked and told her I would etransfer the remaining amount ($200) to her later that evening (which I did).
I picked the kitten up at 4pm and at 5:01pm I had already called the vet and made an appointment for Thursday January 4th. Kitten's eyes were running, it was sneezing, and she was very underweight still. (A two month old kitten should be close to 2lbs, my kitten was only 11.7oz)

The vet bill cost 256.00CAD (the visit and the prescriptions themselves were only $185.00CAD) and the kitten was emaciated, had feline herpes virus, and a prolapsed rectum. The vet said that they couldn't give her any booster shots because she was so weak she may die. When I paid the bill, an employee advised me I should call the RCMP, SPCA, and animal control to report this lady, and send her my bill for the vet. I asked my lash technician if she would be willing to etransfer me $185.00 since I had only had the cat for 2 days, after explaining the kittens condition and providing proof of my receipt. She declined, saying I could bring the cat back for a refund (not including vet costs) and denying the kitten was unhealthy.

Do I have any legal recourse here? She reneged on our verbal agreement, she is an unlicensed breeder, and has an unlicensed lash technician business, of which she does both out of her home. I am uncomfortable returning the kitten because it needs a lot of care, which it obviously did not receive. I am just wondering if I have any options to get some money back, since I am a student or if there are any options for me to try and shut down her business since even though I don't believe it was willful neglect, it is still neglect and unfortunately had serious consequences for my kitten.

 I have a screenshot of the deposit amount agreed upon through text (which was paid in cash) and a record of an etransfer of $200, the rest of the cost of the kitten was paid in cash. I also have text messages confirming the cat was not well enough to leave on the 21st of December and then screenshots of her saying the cat was perfectly healthy and was ready to be let go at the beginning of January. The only other bank statements would be of payment for my lashes to her which may help in getting her to purchase an actual business license or receiving a fine?

Thank you for any advice whether it involves the cat or just the reporting of her unlicensed and improper businesses/business practices. Either way, I obviously learned how important it is to do your due diligence and won't be making this mistake again.

Answer:
 Theres three stray cats I feed living in 10 degree weather because someone bought a cat instead of adopting one. Don't pay someone to make more cats unwanted by breeding cats. The shelter in my hometown puts down about 15k cats a year because someone got bored once mittens grew up and someone else bought a kitten from some asshole like this instead of taking a cat that needed a home.

Verbal contracts are generally enforceable. But realistically you have to sue, and collect, and thats tough to do successfully.


Title: [Boston, MA] My roommate wants to evict a sublet on his own for having an extra person in the room

Question: My roommate (who is on the lease for the apartment) just started subletting his room, even though it is forbidden to sublet in the lease. He did so with no written or formal agreement, and the landlord does not know. The sublet paid him and moved in a week ago. It turns out that her mother also moved in with her and is staying. This was unannounced and not agreed upon. Is he within his right to either: 1) kick the mother out or 2) kick them both out and refund their rent?

Answer: Your roommate is his sublessees' landlord, so he can terminate their lease and remove them in accordance with the landlord/tenant laws of Boston.


Title: 15 years old and I don’t have a birth certificate how do I get one this late in the game?

Question:
(I live in California near San Diego) I was accidentally born at home and when I was taken to the hospital they never gave my mom the paper work. We’ve gone to the hospital I was born at and nothing turned up. We’ve also tried numerous times to redo the paperwork and we’ll sit down with the employee of wherever we are and they’ll say we did all the papers right but then 2 months later we’ll get a letter sayin we didn’t full them out correctly
Every damn time
I turn 16 in February and I want to get a job
But I can’t because no social security number
I can’t open a bank account
I can’t drive
Can’t leave the country
Can barely even go to school
(I am trans and changed my name which is not really helpful in this situation either since the only papers I can really use to go to school are my baptism papers because apparently those work but they have the wrong name)
And there is a lot more and I just really need help
As you can see I’m desperate for answers
If you have any that’d be very much appreciated

Answer:
 In terms of your mother's unwillingness to cooperate: What are the chances that the situation isn't that you were accidentally born at home but, rather, that you were accidentally not born in the USA?Answer #2: Do you still have the baptismal papers? Those can be used to get a state ID / birth certificate. You can also see about contacting the hospital your mother was transported to.

After you establish an ID you can then go about changing the gender on your official documents.Answer #3: >If you (or your child) were born in California, and the birth
was never registered:

>* If Your Child is Over One Year Old: You can file an
Application for Delayed Registration of Birth (VS 85
form) with the California Department of Public Health
– Vital Records (CDPH-VR).

>…

>###Who can apply for a delayed birth certificate?

>If the person whose birth is being registered is under
18 at the time application is made, the application
may be filed only by their parent, legal guardian, or
the attending physician or principal attendant at birth.

****

From the informational pamphlet [Delayed Registration of Birth \(PDF\)](https://www.cdph.ca.gov/Programs/CHSI/CDPH%20Document%20Library/Delayed%20Registration%20of%20Birth.pdf). It should answer your questions about the process of getting a California birth certificate.

You can access the VS 85 form on [this page](https://www.cdph.ca.gov/Programs/PSB/Pages/BirthDeathMarriageCertificates.aspx).Answer #4: This is really fishy. You should have no issue getting a copy of your birth certificate if your mother is applying for it and has a valid drivers license/ID and social security number. My father obtained a copy of mine a handful of times when I was younger and and as an adult I've done so for my children and myself as well. I've always received copies pretty much immediately (at the vital records office, I've never applied by mail)

Sure you're mother's not hiding something?


Title: NC, Military. Movers destroyed a recalled piece of furniture, can I double dip on reimbursement?

Question:
So military movers break stuff.  Whatever, that's what's claims are for.  We make a point of not owning expensive breakables and we carry heirlooms with us.  Usually they just break a few things, but this time, when we moved from VA to NC, they broke A LOT of things. And it was through negligence, not "shit happens."  They literally ripped handles off appliances to make them fit in boxes.  They tore (not unscrewed, tore) apart parts of an exercise machine, "disassembled" furniture that should never have been disassembled, etc.  Thousands in damages.  One of the more expensive items they damaged was a dresser from IKEA.  They broke the mirror, they took it apart in a way that involved breaking a bunch of fasteners, dragged it across concrete (I assume) or found some other way to snap more fasteners and make it nearly impossible to re-insert the drawers.  I have lots of pictures.  The people who delivered it offered to fix it with gorilla glue, and said "as long as you never move it it should be fine!" I declined.  I'm claiming it as a total loss.

I later found out that this same dresser was recalled by IKEA because it is a tipping hazard.  IKEA has offered to come install a tether, but the new house has lathe-and-plaster walls and I'm not supposed to fuck with them.  They offered to come pick up the item and refund my money.  Awesome.

My questions is this:  Can I get a refund from the movers and IKEA both?  I feel that the movers owe me for being careless and breaking my shit, and IKEA owes me for selling me a product that could potentially kill my non-existent children if they were stupid enough to pull out all three drawers (which I had filled with rocks) at the same time, pulling the dresser down on top of them.

Is there anything legally, ethically or morally (in that order) preventing me from filing both claims?  Am I likely to have problems when the IKEA guy comes to pick up the dresser and it's in pieces?

Thanks in advance!

Answer: The legal term for this plan is called "Fraud."


Title: [MA] college hounding me for tuition two years after i dropped out

Question:
here's the situation im in:

2015 - less than a month into the semester my discover loan was denied. I couldn't pay so I dropped out. I don't remember what paperwork was filed or not filed, but they knew I couldn't pay and I stopped going to classes.

2015 - now : school has never reached out to me about owning money, despite knowing my address, parents address, email, and phone number, then all of a sudden I get a collection notice for $10,000 in tuition from a debt collection agency.

I don't want to call and agree to whatever terms they give me without knowing my options. Never once did the school try to contact me for money. They knew I couldn't pay and had stopped going to classes. Is there any way out of this or should I call the collection agency and tell them I can't pay and try to negotiate a lower price and payments?

Answer: Did you officially drop the classes or did you just stop going? Because that is going to make a big difference.


Title: Do I Need My Tenant's SSN?

Question:
What information do I need from my rent-to-own tenant in order to send them to collections if things go sideways? Is info from a driver's license enough? They're hesitant to share their SSN if they don't have to. Tenant and property are in NY State.
Topic:
Credit Debt Bankruptcy

Answer: I suggest getting their SSN so you can run a background check on them.


Title: Any federal lawyers here?

Question: [deleted]

Answer: You can post a question publicly if you have one. It is both against the rules of this sub and unethical to deal with things over PM.


Title: My shared fenced is falling down and neighbor won’t share cost of repair

Question: I own my home, the neighbor is a multi unit owned by a landlord and is rented out. I got landlords phone number, had him meet me at the property, he saw the collapsed wall (from my side of fence, he seemed scared to be seen by his tenants!?!). He said he knows some people to fix it, I said I do too. I got a quote, he said it’s too high, I pretended to negotiate the amount down (actually I just decided to pay more than half) he still refused this lowered amount. He said he can get someone cheaper. That was two years ago, this guy seems like a dead beat landlord. He told me he doesn’t own the building his sons do, but they are far away. Then he showed me a (surgery?) scar on his chest and said he’s a sick old man and his life is hard. What to do?

Answer: Based on how laws work in most places..you can fix it then bill him for half, which he won't pay, then you'll have to take him to court or file something and he will pay to save money. Or had an attorney call and squeeze them..they will split it.Answer #2: You might want to have somebody come out and stake your peropty to verify whose land the fence is actually on. If the fence is on his side, you can check/call your county/city and file a complaint about the state of the property. You didn't post your lcation so it is hard to lookup the city/county codes. If the fence is on your side, generaly it is your responsibility to replace.


Title: Employer is threatening to sue me for non-compete but my contract doesn't seem to include it.

Question:
I live and work in the state of Washington and my employer is located in Chicago, IL. I have been working for them for around 1 year and 9 months and I gave them three weeks notice that I would be leaving for another company (only 2 weeks is required by my contract). My boss immediatly told me that I can "quit when he tells me I can quit." and that "failure to do would would result in a non-compete lawsuit." I have reached out to some local lawyers but I wanted to see what Reddit had to say (to help alliviate my anxiety).

However, I took a look at my contract and there is no specific non-competition clause. He claims that the conflict of information clause is enough for a lawsuit. I have copied the exact wording below

Conflicts of Interest. During my employment with the Company, I will not engage in other employment, consulting, freelance assignments or other business relationships that could conflict with the proper performance of my duties with the Company, except as required by law or permitted by the Company in writing. This includes engaging in other business relationships that may affect my ability to be loyal to the Company in business transactions or that may lead to my disclosing or using Confidential and Proprietary Information in violation of this Agreement.

The contract states that everything is governed by the state of IL and that no additional information can be added without all parties consent. I have not given consent to any other contracts.

Thank you all for your help!

Below I have pasted the entirety of the contract for anyone who wishes to review. It's terribly formatted as it's a PDF file copy. I removed the contract as it isn't necessary. Thanks!

Answer:
 1.  No one is going to read that entire contract.  Just delete it.

2.  Non-competes have to be specific & limited in location and duration.

3.  Non-conflict clauses like the one above are about your behavior *during your employment* not after.

4.  Your employer is being a dumbass.Answer #2: No one is reading or commenting on the full contract. As far as this:

>Conflicts of Interest. During my employment with the Company, I will not engage in other employment, consulting, freelance assignments or other business relationships that could conflict with the proper performance of my duties with the Company, except as required by law or permitted by the Company in writing. This includes engaging in other business relationships that may affect my ability to be loyal to the Company in business transactions or that may lead to my disclosing or using Confidential and Proprietary Information in violation of this Agreement.

As soon as your notice period is up, then you are no longer employed, at which point that clause no longer applies.

Is your boss the owner of the company you currently work for? Because if not, don't worry at all about his threats to sue -- the HR and Legal departments will tell him to go piss up a rope.

Otherwise, if he sues you, you'll need to hire an attorney in Illinois to go in and embarrass the shit out of this guy in court. Answer #3: > My boss immediatly told me that I can "quit when he tells me I can quit."

Inform your boss of the 13th amendment and tell him to pound sand.

If you're sued respond. You won't be, because it's an idiotic threat by a bully.


Title: [OHIO] Speed Camera speeding ticket - I wasn't driving the vehicle

Question:
So I received a speeding "civil infraction" in the mail, with a picture of the license plate on my car.  I was not driving the vehicle, but I know who was.  The "notice of liability" is very clear that this ticket is only a Civil infraction, and not a Criminal infraction like a normal speeding ticket would be.

My options are to agree I was the driver of the vehicle, and pay the civil fine....or to enter the name and address of the person who was driving, and the fine will be transferred to them.

How can they force me to name the driver of the vehicle for a civil infraction from a speed camera?  Should I simply be able to state that I was not the driver of the vehicle and refuse to incriminate the actual driver?

This whole "civil infraction" and not "criminal offense" is a bit strange...

It happened near Youngstown, where this article was written a couple of years ago:
http://www.tribtoday.com/news/local-news/2016/10/speed-camera-tickets-in-girard-disputed/

Not actually in that jurisdiction, but very close...

Answer:
 You know... you can tell your buddy to pay the fine that he incurred without turning him in.

If he refuses to, I'm not sure why you are throwing your credit rating away to protect someone who is willing to let you do so.Answer #2: > Should I simply be able to state that I was not the driver of the vehicle

You can state whatever you want, but they don't have to believe you.  Answer #3: >How can they force me to name the driver of the vehicle for a civil infraction from a speed camera?

That's the law.

>Should I simply be able to state that I was not the driver of the vehicle and refuse to incriminate the actual driver?

Sure. You're the registered owner and are responsible for your vehicle so you'll pay.

>This whole "civil infraction" and not "criminal offense" is a bit strange...

It's a courtesy. Your vehicle broke the law. Instead of incurring fines and points and insurance rates, they just want a civil payment to sustain the program and fill the cities coffers.


Title: Bedbugs in hall way and I've been told they are "carpet beetles". Can I break my lease as it's uninhabitable?

Question:
Hello, I currently live in an apartment and I've slowly noticed about 6-10 bedbugs on the wall in my apartment. I've killed them all by the front door, and when I step into the hall I notice 20-30 bedbugs around the light fixture. The exterminator the complex employs has stated that these are carpet beetles and we shouldn't be worried. Yet these bugs have blood in them when squished. I live in NE Ohio. Is there any way I could break my lease to get out before I get infested?Thanks.

EDIT: the 6-10 have been over 3 weeks not one day!

Answer: Are you sure these are bedbugs?  Bedbugs don't like light and are very small.  Plus with an infestation that bad you should have bites all over you.


Title: Can I be sued if someone crashes my car?

Question:
My cousin was driving my car with me in the passenger seat when we got into an accident. The police report says my cousin is at fault, he does not own a car and has no auto insurance. Since its my car, my insurance will pay for the damages to the other party if the amount is within my policy limits.

If the other party or their insurance company wants to sue for more money through subrogation, will they be eligible to sue me?. My cousin is a student who does not have a dime to his name and tens of thousands in college loans, so they can't go after him for money.

Am I legally liable for to be sued for more money under subrogation. What can I do to protect myself, should I engage an attorney?

Thanks!

Edit: I am in california and I have 25K in liability and 15K per person and 30K   per incident in injuries on my policy
Topic:
Insurance

Answer: California has a "permissive use" statute that holds you liable for any damaged caused by someone you permit to use your car. So yes, they can sue you if your insurance limits aren't sufficient to cover the damage. Your insurer should be defending this suit, so there's no reason for you to pay for another attorney until it actually looks like the policy will be exhausted. For now, just ask the insurance attorney to keep you apprised, and increase your liability limits. $25k is not enough, unless you are flat broke and judgement proof.


Title: [CA] My father's visa was denied, what are our options and can I (US citizen) petition to bring my parents into the US?

Question:
I'll start with some background. 30 years ago or so, when my father was a minor, his older siblings and their friends attempted to cross the border illegally. Obviously that didn't go well, and it stayed on my father's record. He's had to reapply for a visa every 1, 5, sometimes 10 years or so. He's also received several pardons for what happened. Growing up, it was never a problem other than a minor albeit stressful period where my dad had to wait a long while for his visa.

I was born in the United States and am considered a citizen, I'm also 25 years old. I live, study, and work in California at the moment. My brother was also born in the United States. All of our hospital bills were payed properly and my father has never been in another legal incident (I'll come back to this in a moment). I lived in Mexico most of my life but moved back to California to attend college.

Last year, my dad had to reapply for his visa and was denied. The consul apparently didn't believe that my father was able to pay our hospital bills when we were born. Her "reasoning" was that there was no way my dad could obtain such a decent job with his type of "background" that would allow him to afford paying our bills. My dad had all the papers to prove everything, including the pardons he's received, but the consul wouldn't accept them. She declined his visa and put some kind of stamp that puts him under a "Not recommended" list. I'm not too sure what that means, but my dad left the building in tears and called us in the middle of a panic attack.

His current job requires him to be crossing the border often, as the company also has offices in the US. He's also supposed to fly out of San Diego, California to Germany and Poland later in the year. I believe he said he tried explaining this to the consul, but she refused to listen or believe him. I was shocked when I found out, and it's been really tough on him and my family (half of us live in California, while my parents and the other half of my family live in Mexico).

He tried to apply once again for a visa but was also declined. Needless to say he's felt defeated and very stressed due to what may happen with his job. What are our options at this point? What can I do to help in this situation? My parents only wanted their visas to travel and visit me and my brother, but would petitioning to bring them to the US be a better option?

Answer: With the current administration, good luck. It sounds like he's out of luck. You can try to get an immigration attorney to assist but it's extremely unlikely anything is going to change here. Answer #2: Your father needs to discuss this with an immigration attorney.


Title: Job took too much out in taxes. It's been a month. All I get are responses about how they're investigating the cause.

Question:
This is in New York.

Myself and many other colleagues were recently affected by a mistake in payroll that took out too much in federal and state taxes. We had double taxes taken out, which is a large sum. Some of us got a small amount back, but not nearly the correct amount. I've been trying to get my money back for a month now. I keep getting responses about how they are still trying to find the cause.

I don't care what the cause is, I just need my money back. Is there some sort of action I should be considering?

Answer: If the government has the money then you wait until tax time and they will give it back.


Title: [FL]I successfully sued the local sheriff's department, now they are stalking me.

Question:
Two years ago I was pulled over by the police in the small town part of Florida where I live and to make a long story short, they were a bit excessive in their interaction to me, to the degree that I had to go to the hospital. I was never charged with a crime, and after being released from the hospital I got in contact with a personal injury law firm. We filed suit, and  after some legal wrangling the county decided on on a decent settlement rather than going to trial a few weeks ago.

Now however the sheriff's department always seems to be around me. They park outside my house at night watching me and knock on my door saying there is a 'noise complaint'. They follow me when I drive and have pulled me over twice now being issued citations for speeding [1-9 over the speed limit].  I may have been doing 41 in a 40. The officers who gave me the tickets have been always coldly professional. I've had neighbors tell me that they have seen cops looking in my windows while I am at work.

I reached out to the lawyers who helped me with the settlement early in the week,  but they have not returned my call.

What do I do now?

Answer:
 dash camera, security camera and flood lights on your house, keep a log (in a few different locations) of all interactions, badge numbers, car numbers, plates, times etc. gather evidence, and sue again. Answer #2: Security cameras to prove the harassment.
Get a dash cam.

Once you prove harassment get a restraining order and start a new lawsuit.  Answer #3: This probably is not practical advice but I would consider moving. At least tô a town or two away (if you live in a high population area). Like the top comment said, this reminds me of Steven Avery and that dude should have definitely moved. Answer #4: I'm surprised no one has suggested contacting your state rep.  They might be able to make something happen if the department won't.


Title: Got gas and got charged only $1 instead of $14...

Question: So I recently went to get gas for my friends car because I've been borrowing it and the total came out to be $14.48. Well, on my bank account app, it says that I only spent $1 there (it is a pending charge though). I find myself to be a pretty honest person so I was wondering when the charge goes through, can I just let them know what happened and give them the other $13.48? Thank you!

Answer:
 When the charge goes through, it will be for $14.48.

The $1.00 is just a place holder.

But yes.  On the off chance it really only goes through for a dollar (and it won't) you can go back and pay the other 13.48


Title: [PA] I was groped and intimidated with a knife when I confronted the man. Can I get him on assault charges?

Question: [deleted]

Answer: File a police report. I never understand why people try to go the civil route before they even attempt a criminal resolution.


Title: Ohio landlord took extra month rent from me then refused to refund it, instead added it to security deposit. Do I have a case?

Question:
Edit: thepatman pointed out *technically* they refunded me by adding that as a credit. That it was obtained in error is a moot point then. Going to try and challenge some of their items but I doubt they'll budge. If anyone has any experience/advice on challenging move out charges that would be much appreciated.

I moved out of a rented house on October 31st. A few days prior, the company we rented it from apparently failed to program their payment system to be aware of lease end dates, so they charged me 1.2k for the next month's rent. I caught it too late, so I couldn't cancel it at my bank's end. After a week of calling them daily, they finally told me that I would have to wait until the move out report was done to get my money refunded.

Today we finally get that report and lo and behold my money is now listed as "additional deposit" under our security deposit for a total of 2.4k in deposits. The itemized list added up to about 2.2k in damages, which I've since broken down into valid claims ($845) or bunk ($975 and $400 in "maybe"). I took photos of every room before leaving to prove some of them are bunk.

Just now noticed some of the items' prices are not in line with the move out checklist they provided us. It specified $25 to replace window blinds, but 2/3 items regarding blinds has $30 listed. It specified $5 per light bulb replacement, but has one item that says 1 bulb for $10, another that's 2 bulbs for $15, and yet another that's 2 bulbs for $40. It sure seems like they made an effort to total up damages to be able to keep all 2.4k in deposits.

Referring to [this](https://www.thebalance.com/ohio-security-deposit-law-2125085) source, some of the itemized list seems questionable, like "The house will need to be thoroughly cleaned once all work is completed" for $300. They also didn't include interest on the security deposit, which we're entitled to as we signed a 2 year lease.

Can anyone tell me if I'd have a case in small claims court to at the very least get my 1.2k back that they took in error, then refused to refund? I'm typing out comments for some of the claims I felt were bunk now. I plan to send it to them in hopes they voluntarily remove some of them, but I have no idea if my pictures would hold up in court if they refuse. Any advice is greatly appreciated. I can provide the report, my comments, and photos if they would help.

Answer:
 I would definitely challenge their list, especially if you have pictures. To do this, write a letter with your dispute and send it to them Certified Mail and SAVE THE RECEIPT (and take a picture of the letter and mailing receipt).

I would say something like: "Thank you for providing this list of alleged damages. I am disputing the following items <LIST>. Additionally, I believe some charges were incorrectly calculated <LIST>. As such, it is my assertation that I owe $XXX. Please immediately refund $2400-XXX via certified check to me at the address listed below. If this sum is not refunded within 30 days I will pursue legal action to recover it in accordance with Ohio Revised Code 5321.

Sincerely, Omega

NOTES: If the landlord did not return the difference with the itemized list, they are in violation or ORC 5321.16(b). If they deducted money for certain items, carpet being the big one, they can only deduct the depreciated cost. Example: they charged you $500 for carpet replacement. However, the carpet was installed in 2014 and has a 5 year depreciation (typical), so they should only charge you $200 for the carpet.

You also mentioned interest, but you are only entitled to interest on any money over one month's rent (I.e. the extra $1200) at 5% annually. So one, month of interest would be $12


Title: I took my spouse's credit card

Question:
My husband went on a 5 day drunk for the 3rd time this year, spending money we don't have, holed up in a hotel room, no call no showed to work. I had a strong suspicion he was driving drunk so I took the car he drives (both names on the the title) and hid it at a friends house. I removed all the money from our joint checking account and later snuck into our home  while he was asleep (both names on the house) and took the credit and debit cards. 2 of the cards are in his name only. I have not used them.

He is now threatening to call the police for the theft of his cards. Does he have a valid complaint? I may have power of attorney, I'm not sure.

I am safe at his parents home and they gave me their full support. But I have never had more than a speeding ticket and I'm not sure what to expect.

Edit: Missouri USA
Topic:
Alcohol Related Other than DUI

Answer:
 And while we’re at it, a meeting with a divorce attorney would be prudent.  Or at the very least a CPA.

Im not saying divorce is the next step or something you need to do.  But for as long as you’re married him opening new credit lines, spending joint credit, spending money out of joint accounts etc will either make that your debt or complicate your life very significantly.  A divorce attorney or CPA is likely going to be best option to discuss your options regarding your financial security for as long as your married to him, as well as any other options that might be available.

Couples counseling, or even simply going to a couples counselor alone is also something to consider.  And rehab for him.  Again, I  don’t know where you’re at, what direction you plan on going, where he’s at, etc.  And I’m sure you know these things already, but sometimes hearing these things helps.  I’m just saying think about your options.

Because marriage is more than simply loving someone.  It’s also a contract and there are a lot of legal obligations that go along with it.  It’s important to consider that whole host of legal obligations and know that the loving part and the legal obligations don’t have to go together.  You can have one without the other.

Good luck.Answer #2: Spouses are classified much differently than strangers in many law incidents. Good luck to him seeking damages.


Title: A car was illegally stopped on a highway with no shoulder with no flashers on. I hit them so is it my fault?

Question:
The car was stopped and I rammed the back of their car. They evidently had a flat tire and didn’t pull off the road into the grass (which was a flat area and not a ditch). The officer said he’s going to call me about a ticket and that the other driver may get a ticket for illegal stopping/standing.

Is this accident my fault? They were at a complete stop on a 4 one road (2 each direction) with no shoulder but a grassy area and no flashers. I’m so angry at myself for not swerving. The other driver is fine and my car is totaled because the other driver STOPPED on a 45 mph highway!

Answer: Generally hitting stationary objects will result in some blame.


Title: Local church preaching in public on karaoke machine

Question:
I live in California and my house is on the corner of a very busy main street. Across the street at the gas station parking lot, a local church stands outside and preaches in Spanish on a karaoke machine with the volume turned way up. The preacher speaks so fast you can't even understand him. You can hear the rambling very clearly from my living room and it's sooooo annoying and distressing. This goes on for several hours. What can I do to make them stop? I've thought about throwing eggs at them and the longer this goes on the heavier and bigger the objects get that I fantasize about throwing at them. I'd rather not wind up in jail so is there a legal course of action I can take to get them to stop?
Topic:
Douche

Answer: Call the non-emergency police line and ask if they need a permit.Answer #2: Call the police (not 911).  There are laws about using amplification devices without proper permits, and about disturbing the peace.


Title: (X-post) Just discovered my dad took out over $120k in private student loans, in my name. No idea what to do.

Question:
(Crosspost from /r/personalfinance)

So, I got a collection call today for an account I had no knowledge of; a private student loan in the amount of approximately $120,000.00, disbursed back in 2008 in mine and my father's name. I did not take out a loan in 2008, and I certainly didn't borrow $120k (I was barely scraping by that year, to say the least).

Now, it may sound like jumping the gun, but knowing my father had lost his high paying job (in 2004), has been on the verge of losing his house (he finally lost it last fall), and fell into some major drug abuse (meth) over the last decade, it seems as though he's the most likely culprit. Especially seeing as he actually had cosigned on my student loans back in '03-04.

My uncle also told me that he was fairly certain my father had taken loans out in my name (my uncle was living with him) and that he'd held back on giving me my full loan amounts (of the loans I'd actually taken out - my dad insisted on controlling the funds). He'd cosigned in the past, so he has all of my personal information, and knows how to acquire a private student loan online (which doesn't require an in-person signature). He also hasn't worked in over a decade, but managed to retain his home (which recently sold for nearly $400k after it was foreclosed, repaired, and put back on the market), his three vehicles, Ski boat, Jet Fishing boat, Jetskis, Snow Mobiles, upkeep on himself and his wife, hobbies (aside from the drugs), trips, etc.

I've since discovered (15 minutes ago, or so) that I was enrolled in a school I never actually attended (online program), and an additional loan, as well as a Pell grant, were disbursed in 2011 (~$2,000.). I was working full-time in another state in 2011, so there's no way I would have registered, let alone enrolled and received financial aid at a new school. (Plus he registered for accounting and "e-business management", and neither of those are/were my major). The school mentioned I would have to somehow prove I never attended, which for an online class, four years later would be pretty difficult to do.

The creditor (of the big loan) offered to assist me in filing a report (I'm assuming fraud?) on Monday, but I have no idea what to do at this point. Can you even dispute cosigned student loans? Do I need to hire a lawyer? And I know there's something about a tax cut off date coming up (7 years?), could that have implications on a suit? Moreover, how can I find any other private student loans he may have taken out? The only reason I know about this one is that it's in collections, and they managed to call my cell phone.

To say I'm shocked is an understatement, and I'm trying to keep my shit together and stay calm (I'm pretty sure my future is fucked?) because my initial response is to.. essentially go full Shiva and destroy his world. I'd rather do that with legal backing, and not tip him off to cover his ass on fraud charges. Best case scenario is he'd come clean with it, but I'm definitely not holding my breath for that.

Let me know if you need additional information, I'd be happy to elaborate, I'm just a bit bewildered right now so this is probably a mess of a post.

TL;DR Drug addicted, jobless father seems to have taken out over $100k in private student loans, in my name (cosigned). What do I do?

EDIT: I'm currently in Idaho, but was in Washington in 2008 (not sure if relevant?)

Answer:
 Call the cops.  If you live in a big city they probably have a ID theft department or detectiveAnswer #2: >Can you even dispute cosigned student loans? Do I need to hire a lawyer?

Yes and yes.  This is a significant amount of money.  You want an attorney or you will probably be paying this off yourself for a long long time.Answer #3: Have you checked your credit reports.  You can get a free one from all three bureau at annualcreditreport.com

Any active student loans should show up on at least one of them if not all three.  You can also see if he opened up any credit cards in your name.  I would also file a police report  and then freeze your credit so it is much more difficult to open any new accounts.Answer #4: Call the police and hire a lawyer to help you through this. I recommend also putting a freeze on your credit. Also, most homeowners insurance policies have an endorsement for ID theft, sort of a guide to help meddle through it. If you have renters or a homeowners policy, check to see if you have this. Good luck!Answer #5: Call the cops, and be sure to never ever ever ever even suggest that you will ever make a payment or even say that you will make a payment on this loan.  Doing so can really, really really screw things up for you.  Get an attorney, somehow; you will need one.

Call the cops.  It is not your debt.  You don't even know about it, call the cops.  Answer #6: Going along with the other replies I would also suggest getting a copy of your credit report to make that there aren't other loans you don't know about.


Title: (US - MI) Dealership left the oil cap off of my engine and is refusing to take responsibility

Question:
I recently received 4 free oil changes to a local dealership in town. They forgot to replace my oil cap and I proceeded to drive for around 2 weeks before noticing. In this time there is no doubt in my mind that dirt and other grime has gotten in through the valve cover as I can see particles when I shine a light in there. I called them to let them know and they called back and left a message saying that due to the change of ownership, they lost my contact info and were unable to call me to let me know about the oil cap.

Previously we had agreed that they would remove my valve cover and oil pan to clean and supply another free oil change. Afterwards I was going to run the car for 3,000 miles and take an oil sample to send to a testing facility to see if any long term damage had resulted from their negligence.

I received a call this morning that actually the company that went out of business did my oil change and that the new company isn't going to be held liable for any problems that might result from that, but they will change my oil free of charge.

To clarify, this is the same building and the same staff that were there when I received my oil change. They just changed the name.

What further action should I take?

EDIT: The car in question is a 2003 Acura RSX with 150,000 ish miles

Answer:
 Does the old company exist? Did they claim bankruptcy, or were they bought by the new one?Answer #2: On the bright side, unless you were doing some serious off-roading during those two weeks, it is extremely unlikely that there is any damage that a fresh oil change can't fix.Answer #3: > What further action should I take?

First you should figure out if there's any damage to your car.

You remind me of the people who call me from a car crash scene to ask if they have a personal injury case before they've bothered to see a doctor - or even an EMT.Answer #4: You expect them to inspect it and go "yup we should buy you an engine we messed it up". I promise they will find no damages.

Take it to another shop if you really want answers. If you do require repairs than you can fix it and try to sue the first shop. But if they're really out of business than you my be sunk.

Same building same staff doesn't mean it hasn't been bought out. But that's kinda the thing you need to figure out.


Title: Was given $10,000 in will and mother isn't giving me any access.

Question: My great aunt passed away back in May and gave almost every member of our family $10,000. I was 18 at the time so legally all of that money should go to me, correct? I live in Illinois. My mom took all of that money and put it into a bank account that only she can access. Shortly after this, I started class in Chicago despite expressing wishes not to. In order to live up there, my sister and I bought an apartment. The mortgage is under my mom also and my sister and I are basically paying her rent to cover the mortgage. All of my share of the rent is coming from that $10,000 despite the fact that I don't even want to be living in Chicago. I'm asking because right now I want to break away from my mom but there is no feasible way for me to become financially independent while going to college without that $10,000 to get me started and if I don't figure everything out soon, that money will start deteriorating pretty quickly. I also have not signed any paperwork pertaining to the $10,000 or paying rent to my mother. Any advice is welcome.

Answer:
 >I started class in Chicago despite expressing wishes not to....I want to break away from my mom but there is no feasible way for me to become financially independent while going to college without that $10,000 to get me started...

Your problems really aren't legal problems, they are more independence problems.  Why are you living in a home that your mother owns in Chicago, with your sister, and paying your mother rent (out of your supposed inheritance)?  If you don't want to live there, then move.

If you think that you can be fully independent of your mother (financially and personally), then you can do that and try to legally get control of your $10,000.  If you think that not being fully independent of your mother is worth MORE than $10,000 in the long run, then you will need to work with your mother on a financial and personal plan that makes sense to both of you.


Title: So today is Memorial Day but my job doesn’t pay this holiday or majority of the holidays with the exception of Christmas Day and thanksgiving

Question:
My partner is questioning how my job can get away with not paying many holidays while he gets paid for those holidays. Is my job breaking any laws or jumping around hoops ?
Topic:
Employment Law

Answer: There is no law in the US to pay for holidays.


Title: Since the police can search garbage without a warrant, could they technically search Oscar the Grouch's home without a warrant?

Question:
This subreddit was the best place I could think of to post this and I'm sorry if this breaks a rule (I couldn't find one applicable to this).

I was reading over California v. Greenwood for a school assignment and this happened across my mind.

Answer:
 I don't have a case to quote but I think some courts have found that a homeless person in his "camp", even if in a public-ish place like under a bridge, has a reasonable expectation of privacy and a search warrant would be required to search the box he lives in.

In that sense I think the trash can is Oscar's abode and not trash. Answer #2: First of all, Oscar isn't a person and has no constitutional rights. But let's say Gordon lived there.

In that case, do these hypothetical police officers know it's the domicile of a person or do they see a trash can and assume (as most people would) that it is merely a trash can?


Title: [CA] Wife accused of shoplifting from grocery store

Question:
My wife was shopping at a big name grocery chain here a few days ago. She was using some bags that she took in with her to the store because some chains here will no longer allow more than a certain number of plastic bags to be taken on checkout. The placement of items into these bags alerted an undercover employee/security guy to keep an eye on her. She started to come down with a migraine which she gets periodically, she has a doctors note for a prescription for her medication. However the medication was out in her car. She decided that instead of leaving her bags, she would get a can of soda (caffeine can help) which she would pay for at checkout and try and stick it through till she was checked out.

The migraine got worse faster than she expected, she tried to leave the premises with bags and groceries in hand without paying (she was slightly delirious at this point because of the migraine). Security stopped her, put her under citizens arrest, and put handcuffs on. She tried to get them to use her debit card several times to pay for the goods, they refused saying "it would just bounce". She asked for her medication as her head was splitting at this point, and they refused. She said she didn't want to sign anything, however they said that she had to sign a paper, in order to get the handcuffs off (she was scared and just wanted to get out of there). In addition she does not know what the paper said because she was in so much pain, she was unable to read. At some point in there the grocery chain people said that she would be facing a fine from them.

A cop came, wrote her a ticket and set up a date for court.

I have bank statements that prove that we had more than enough money, a grocery list, doctors notes for the migraines, and checking statements showing we have purchased similar amounts of goods from this same grocery store.

Is there anything else I should prepare for the court date? What about the fine that the grocery store mentioned? Anything that can be done about the signing of paperwork, figuring out what it was that she signed, is it even valid as she was under duress?

Thank you so much in advance.

Answer:
 > she tried to leave the premises with bags and groceries in hand without paying

That's where your story gets fishy. Why would a person in pain who needs their medicine carry extra stuff with them out the store that is only going to slow them down?

You need to get an attorney who may have some luck working the headache/duress angle. The fact that you had money to pay for it is irrelevant as lots of people steal who could pay.


Title: If a fruit tree in my yard has branches overhanging the public sidewalk who owns the fruit on them?

Question:
I'm terrible at gardening, and once spent so long before finally getting around to pulling out a weed that I noticed it was a baby mulberry tree and left it.   A few years later we have a nice big mulberry tree in our front yard, with branches full of berries just waiting to be plucked and eaten when they are ripe.

I like seeing people pick berries to eat as they walk past, it's nice to bring a little bit of joy into people's lives so I'm not going to do anything to prevent this but if I was motivated to do so would I actually be the legal owner of the berries that grow on branches overhanging public land?

Bonus question: When the children from next door pick berries and  put them in jars and sell them for $2 at the little lemonade stand they made what sort of theoretical trouble could they end up in?

Answer:
 I think your whole post depends on where youre located.

Typically any branch that overhangs in to a space that doesnt belong to you is free to pick from. I.e. your tree growing over the fence in to my yard or in to a public space.

Selling packaged food could require a license


Title: Obfuscation of medical information

Question:
[moved from wrong sub]
I work in what feels like a pretty conservative workplace as a stealth trans person (I transitioned a long time ago and am not particularly out about it except to some very very close friends). Further, nobody at work knows. I'm going out on leave for a few weeks for related medical stuff and the paperwork requires some pretty significant information on this that would very much be to my detriment were it to be known and it would not at all surprise me that, even though it's protected information on the form, the information might be implied in some manner such as whoever looks over the form using the wrong pronouns or just outright outing me (and even if there was some kind of legal retribution to that, the day would be done). So the question is how much can I ask the surgeon to obfuscate the details? I've told everyone who knows I'm going out that it's for a different kind of operation (which I now recognize is a terrible idea because people are going to want to see the scars and such but dammit I'm stuck with it); can they abstract it out to that level of detail? I live in Virginia

Tl;Dr: how much can the hospital help me out here?
Topic:
Healthcare Law including HIPAA

Answer: You can ask the doctor to be vague but they have no obligation to do so. I assume you are applying for FMLA and/or short term disability, so being vague may result in a denial of those benefits as it will not be clear why it’s needed.  Moreover, lying to your boss is a good reason to get fired if you are found out (not that they couldn’t just fire you for being trans as being trans isn’t a protected class in VA).


Title: Leaving my husband pregnant/ with newborn.

Question:
My husband no longer wants to be married to me. But he has asked me to stay until our unborn child is at least 2. I can’t do that. I want to leave but I’m not sure how. I’m thinking of leaving before the baby is born. If I do this, what happens to the baby after it is born? Can I take it home with me? What if I leave after the baby is born. Like from the hospital or after we have been home for a few weeks? Since the baby has lived at a shared home do I need to first go to court? We live in Maryland.
Topic:
Custody Divorce and Family

Answer:
 You can separate whenever you want to. You will still be a me to take the baby home from the hospital. The court will make a parenting order. I can't say what that will look like. Anything from you having full legal and physical custody to him having full custody. Who knows. You don't need to go to go to court before the baby.

You should talk to a local lawyer about timing and strategy. You don't have to file now but it's important to have a road map for your future. Answer #2: You're fine to leave now, and it might be better for you in the long run. Since you're married, you really ought to go get a consultation with a divorce attorney or two before you do anything.

When you give birth, you're under no obligation to notify him or allow him into the room. Hospitals generally release the newborn into the care of the mother. It's rare for courts to remove a breastfeeding infant from it's mother for more than a few hours at a time, but if the father wants joint custody and is otherwise fit he'll probably get it eventually.


Title: [IA] My art is being covered by local news stations for being controversial, but I am not getting any credit.

Question:
I am a high school student in Iowa, and recently I created a piece that sparked controversy within my community. I hung up my piece in my school in a class art show, located in the schools common areas. Many students shared my art with their friends and parents, which resulted in parents contacting the school to have it removed. The school decided to keep it up and ignore these parents, as my piece has a deeper meaning then what these parents assumed it was about. These parents then contacted local news stations. Local news stations came in and filmed/took photographs of my work, and covered it on their website and on TV. However, they did not mention my name or credit me in any way, and I was not asked by school administration or the news station if they could use my art in their story. As the story has gained traction, other journalist websites have used the picture of my art piece in their news articles, again, without giving my name. I was told that because I was a minor, they couldn't give my name without parent permission, but my parents were never approached for a yes/no answer. These articles "credit" my high school's name as the place of origin of my piece.
I looked into copyright laws, and I am still protected by them despite being a minor. I have looked at registering my piece but it looks like copyright still applies, I just cannot sue anyone until it is registered. How do fair use laws come into play here? Does the news station have a right to use art without mentioning the artist? They did not offer any criticism of the piece or thoughtful commentary in their articles.
I will not be posting the links to the articles as of right now because they mention the high school name, which could be considered personal info.
I would like to know if there is any way to gain credit or have these articles removed. They used pictures of my art without crediting me or asking me or my parents.
I apologize if the story seems jumbled, I can answer anything about clarification regarding my issue. Thank you for any help.

Topic:
Intellectual Property

Answer:
 Ha, I know the art.

From what I've seen everything would be covered under fair use anyway.Answer #2: I also had a controversial piece get into the news in HS and trust me, even though you're being mistreated by news media right now, it'll be good for your career in the long run. Don't worry about this particular piece or trying to keep up with the media spread, just focus on continuing to produce work that gets in people's heads.

Put this piece on your CV and portfolio sites, make a short statement on your personal blog or tumblr or whatever, and leave it alone. Trust me, nothing you're doing right now is going to be super important to your work going forward.Answer #3: First, if you are under 18, the station likely has a policy to protect minors. Second, you still own the artwork, correct? Photos and videos might fall under fair use. Finally, no publicity is bad publicity. Lots of people know it’s you. You are getting recognition, just not under your control. Answer #4: What you have done here is place your art in the hands of your high schools administration.
Since they decided where and how display art in their/your school, they decided who gets access.
You could ask the school to take it down, but I see the weird position this would put you in.
The idea you should follow up is that although anyone allowed access to your school could see and photograph your art (cameras are literally everywhere people are) they should not be able to directly profit from it.


Title: CA - Landlord refuses to cash rent check

Question: [deleted]

Answer: Have you tried talking to the landlord? Maybe he's busy with other things in life and hasn't gotten around to cashing the check yet. This would be easier than playing games with stop payments, certified letters, etc.


Title: If I get locked in to a golf course, can I bolt cut my way out?

Question: I went for a hike recently with a friend. The trail starts within the boundaries of the golf course. We got back and there was a note on my windshield that said they tried to contact us (not sure how), and that they are required to lock the gate, and that I'll need to call the police to get the key. I'm just wondering, could I have bolt cut my way out? I did the right thing and just waited like an idiot while the cop came and unlocked the gate, but what if there was an emergency? Location: California

Answer: A hypothetical situation wherein you've gone hiking with bolt cutters but not the means to scale an eight-foot fence, which completely encloses both the golf course and the trail?


Title: [CA] Buyers of my old house are trying to claim that my property that was in the house when they looked at it is now their property.

Question:
I recently sold my house, and bought a new one and moved into it during that process. While living at the old house, I purchased a Nest thermostat and a Nest outdoor camera. When I moved out, I removed the camera and the thermostat, and replaced the thermostat with a brand new but generic thermostat. I have since installed them at my new house. Now, almost a month after the close of that sale, my realtor informed me that the family that bought the old house want those items. He said they’re claiming that because they were installed when they looked at the house, and since I did not specify in writing that I would be taking them with me, they legally belong to them now.

I looked through the disclosures I signed, and nowhere does it mention those items. I never signed any papers claiming I would be leaving anything behind. Anyone have any experience in this area, or know what my rights are here?

Answer:
 Generally items that are "affixed" like window screens, thermostats, etc., come with the house unless otherwise noted.

You're talking about what, $300 total?  Offer them half.  Not worth arguing about.Answer #2: Sold two houses before. Definitely need to be included if it is affixed, which the thermostat was. Not too sure about the camera. Like the person above mentioned, just settle. Not worth the hassle.


Title: Does 1800 Flowers legally have to tell you who sent flowers? I am terrified about deliveries that won't stop.

Question:
Keeping my state private due to the issue at hand. I have a restraining order against someone. I received orders from 1800-Flowers. I contact them via their live chat to ask who the sender was thinking a card was forgotten, I was told that the sender sent them anonymously.

Do I have rights here? I requested they remove the flowers from my doorstep, they will not. I requested they do not allow any other deliveries to my address, they can not guarantee that. I want to know if it was that person breaking the law, what are my rights? Does 1800 flowers have to tell my anything?

And how in 2018 is this an actual policy where someone can send you anonymous flowers. What is wrong with people?

Answer:
 They don't have to tell you.

But if you file a police report, the police can get a court order to get that info as part of their investigation.Answer #2: No they don’t,

However, you can call them and tell them not to deliver to your address.

You can notify the police if you think this is a level of harassment.Answer #3: 1 800 flowers usually contracts with local florists to do the arrangements for them.  You may have better luck calling around to the locals and asking if they do contract with them and of so if they can do anything about it such as refuse the orders that go to your address. They may not but it's worth a shot.

Another option would be reporting it to the police that you believe the restraining order is being violated and let them check into it.


Title: What is the process for applying for emancipation as a minor?

Question:
My younger sister is 14 and I am 19. I am attending college in Washington, DC (in my 2nd year), but my sister is in 9th grade (first year of high school) at a public, academic magnet school in Tennessee. Our household is abusive in a number of ways and Child Protective Services has been called - she has a case worker - but she may be interested in exploring the option of emancipation from our parents. Somewhat obviously, they would not be on board.

1.   *What are the legal processes for this?*
2.   *What would we (my sister and I, to help her in any way I can) need to do to file for this?*
3.   And, if she were emancipated: We don't have other family in Tennessee, she would likely want to keep going to her same high school, and that high school is so work intensive I can't imagine she could do a full or even part time job while going there. *What support networks are in place, if any, for emancipated minors?*

Thanks to all posters in advance. We appreciate it.

Answer:
 >  I can't imagine she could do a full or even part time job while going there

This is why she won't be emancipated. Emancipation is for minors who are able to be fully self-supporting.


Title: Dad (56M) wants me to put his truck title in my name. He doesn’t have a drivers license and said he would get insurance from my sister. It makes me super nervous and I said no. But he won’t be legal if I can’t help. Texas.

Question: He is disabled and can’t work. He has a super fixed income and can’t afford surcharges and/or child support.

Answer:
 Uh, no.

Truck would be in your name. Driven by unlicensed father with your permission. If it's in your name, your sister has no insurable interest so she can't insure it.

So when, without any assets or insurance, he T-bones that school bus, guess who winds up on the receiving end of a very expensive lawsuit. That would be you.

No. Just no.


Title: [IA] CenturyLink is refusing to install fiber internet to our address

Question:
So this is an ongoing situation we have been dealing with for almost two weeks. We moved into a new house and had internet installation scheduled for 8/24. Long story short, they have to run a cable through our neighbor's back yard to do this. The tech said that they weren't able to do that without permission and he would cancel the install.

I called CenturyLink and spoke with a few different people and they said that it was okay as long as we had written permission from our neighbors for them to access the property. We spoke with them and they were fine with it, they signed the paper, no problems.

They were supposed to come out Tuesday but there was an error with their scheduling so they rescheduled us for today. The tech called my husband about 20 min before the time and said they would not be installing it as it's illegal and they can't do it even with written permission. I can't find any sort of law about this and it was my understanding that internet is considered a utility so they should be able to do it even without permission (which again, we have.)

I'm currently talking with CenturyLink but I was wanting to know if anyone knew of any laws as to why they wouldn't be able to install this?

Thanks so much!

Answer: Century Link needs a utility easement across your neighbors property; written permission isn’t good enough for something like this. It’s a real estate issue, not a criminal one. Your neighbor would need to legally convey a portion of their land for easement purposes.