Title: What if my mom's power of attorney is abusing me and my mom, and will try to turn it around on me if I report her-- and what if she may succeed? [Kinda Long]

Question:
EDIT: THIS HAS BEEN RESOLVED!! I feel much more confident about how to handle the situation now-- thanks everyone!!

Let's say, hypothetically, that I've been taking care of my mother from may 2015 to now, from the time I was 17 to 21. It took a while for my mom to get to a point where she couldn’t make decisions.

Then, in comes my aunt, and at first she seemed nice so I agreed to let her have power of attorney because she's older and more experienced.

Except that this didn't turn out to be a fair arrangement at all. I’m still doing all the work, living with my mother with Alzheimer's all the while constantly being accused of not giving a shit about my mother when I do even one thing for myself because that makes me “selfish”, even though she buys unnecessary things for herself with my ailing mom's finances, like movie tickets, restaurants, clothes, pillows-- she got the second house put in her name and an extra credit card for herself that she doesn't know I have access to online, which is how I know what she's spending the money on, and she tells lies all the time to avoid responsibility for her actions and to keep me from getting fair compensation/breaks, such as spending $400 a month for herself for groceries (not including restaurants and fast food), but only sending $300 a month for both me and my mom for groceries, even though my aunt knows that mom will only eat certain things; both circumstances cost more money. She never takes the schedule I made into consideration because everything has to be done on her terms, even though the schedule I made keeps EVERYONE happy, it just requires her to compromise.

She refuses to pay for my mom's healthcare treatments sometimes, even though there are sufficient funds, which caused me to drop 3 of my college classes in order to spend more time looking for solutions to pay for my mom's needs when she's got too much money to qualify for medicare. Eventually she gives in and pays, but not without being told she has no choice by authorities (doctors/ therapists, nurses, and finally a social worker before she gave in), and significantly compromising my GPA for a reason I can't even document because there's no real paper trail.

She gets disproportionately angry to the situation when little things come up that don't go her way, blames me for her mistakes, and screams, degrades, and tries to corner me so I believe I have nowhere else to go and am completely powerless. One way she tried to corner me is provoking me into screaming back at her one time during a great time of stress. I usually don’t respond, but the one time I did was in front of her friend. She calmed down like it never happened once the friend left. The friend told me to respect my elders.

She doesn't care how I feel, she doesn't care if I’m depressed/anxious/can't sleep/had to go to the hospital for stomach issues related to stress, and she goes on and on about how I wronged her when really, SHE wronged me, aka, projecting.
My mom has an estimated 3 years left to live. Guardianship will take too long to declare, neither of us will get it because neither I nor my aunt are financially stable, no one else wants to volunteer, and my mom has no will, so the state will simply go with the cheaper care option, which puts her in significant distress because she doesn't know anyone around her and she's always been afraid of nursing homes. My mom told me what she wants before all this happened, but there is no will stating this information.

My aunt is moving in this January. She's visited a few times for about a week or 2 at a time and made our lives HELL while she was at it--the screaming and degredation never stopped.

So, in order to protect myself so I can effectively take care of my mom, I decided to move out this January and visit occasionally in controlled intervals (weekends every 2 weeks) so that I can check on my mom and keep my distance from my aunt. Let's say I’ve used my mom’s money (with her permission technically because she has not been declared mentally incompetent), and ordered walmart gift cards to cover food, amazon gift cards to cover toiletries (shampoo, razors, TP, etc) and taken $3000 without telling my aunt in order to be able to do this-- money is to be spent only on rent, emergencies ($1000 reserved for emergencies), gas, and toiletries/food the gift cards don’t cover. Financial Aid entirely covers school and healthcare is paid for.
I’m afraid if I report this that my aunt will win and then she’ll be stuck with her and end up sending me to prison. This could happen because it may look like I was exploiting my mom in the beginning by getting my mom to pay for me to go to the movies or go out or something, even though she was capable of making decisions then, so that shouldn't be an issue, but it could be, which scares me. I was also struggling with my parents’ previous abuse so I frequently drank at night and ordered fast food for us instead of practical food, because fast food felt better in the moment. I’ve since curbed these habits with therapy, but they could make it look like I just want to exploit my mom, even though I worked really hard to fix these issues for the both of us.

I’m scared, and I want to do the right thing, but because I was also emotionally abused by narcissists, I sometimes struggle with knowing if what I want to do is a rationalization of something selfish, or if it's really the right thing. I want to find a solution that will benefit both my mom and me, while keeping my aunt at a distance because she's a destructive narcissist.

I have a couple voice recordings that could bring my aunt down because they show inconsistency in what she says, and there are paper trails of her selfish purchases and property changes. My mom's social security checks are also missing and can't be accounted for.

Also, I think I have PTSD and just want to escape already. My aunt's emotional abuse is akin to the same abuse that my parents dealt to me first, and no one believed me then, and now everyone likes my aunt because they don't have to live with her, so I think no one will believe me now, since it's emotional/financial abuse instead of physical/sexual abuse, which is significantly harder to prove. But I refuse to allow this bs to go on, so I want to resolve this before I move on with my life.

Oh, and I don't have money to guarantee a good lawyer.
So how likely is it that my aunt will be able to exploit me and screw my mom's quality of life over if I report her? or should I stay under the radar and be a background-caretaker?

Serious answers only, please.

ALSO: I live in Louisiana.

Answer: Would you be able to contact those doctors and social workers that noticed your aunt was negligent of your mother's medical needs previously? Either of them could be able to direct you to a person/place that could help, and your credibility would increase with their testimonies. If you can't get in contact with them, talking to ANY social worker or doctor could help you. This is not something you should stay silent about.Answer #2: The vast majority of your post is irrelevant. Were you a part of the conversations you recorded? Like did you record your aunt talking *to you* or in general/talking to someone else? And for what do you want to report your aunt and to whom? In two short paragraphs or less please.


Title: Blackmail

Question: Made a fake account in my area and added friends of mine to make it seem like she lived here, added me and asked to call to see if she'd want to hang out, started sending provacative pictures and asked for them back in a video call. Recorded the video and sent them to my family and friends because I wouldn't send them money. Don't know their real name  or if the police can even find them, what do you think I should do?

Answer: Stop jerking it in front of cameras to strangers.


Title: Transferring 401k to a legal SSN?

Question: NEW JERSEY. My coworker was an illegal immigrant. But he has been working hard to become an American citizen. As most of them, he was using a fake social security number. He just recently got a real SSN and was wondering how he could transfer his 401k to his real SSN. How is this possible? Should he just talk to somebody who handles social security numbers?

Answer: Is he still working at the company who sponsors the 401k? Has he informed them?


Title: I walked in on guy performing fellatio on another guy in the sauna at my gym. Austin TX

Question:
I walked in on a guy performing fellatio on another guy in the sauna at my gym. I closed my eyes as quickly as possible and b-lined in for the the gym exit. On the way out I saw the manager and he said hi, like usually, and I told what I had just seen while rushing to my car. I called a day later to see what had been done and to see if I could get there names to press charges and I spoke with another manager who hadn't heard anything about the incident. He said he would look in it but didn't divulge any info.
The following day I received a voicemail from the manager that was working when the incident happened and he said "I wanted to reach out to you, I know that you had saw some stuff thats unacceptable… That stuff i don't condone in the gym, especially mine… there was nothing else i could've done besides kick them out which i did. Give me a call so we can ease this over.."

Basically I can't get the image out of my head and I had to get over a great deal of anxiety to even start going to the gym and now I can't even imagine going back, let alone going into the sauna (which i really enjoyed up to this point). I have problems with anxiety and this kinda made me go into a really anxious state when i think about going to work out. I feel violated by the whole situation and I don't think that they handled it accordingly. What are my options?

Answer:
 > I called a day later to see what had been done and to see if I could get there names to press charges

What do you think you're going to "press charges" for?

> I have problems with anxiety and this kinda made me go into a really anxious state when i think about going to work out.

Dude, you saw a blowjob. Move on with your life.Answer #2: Sorry you had to go through this.  As to not being able to get the image out of your head, there is a subreddit that can help with that:

https://np.reddit.com/r/comingoutAnswer #3: > What are my options?

Find another gym and move on.

Answer #4: You can buy some weights for home.  You saw a blow job, dude, not a murder.  Get over it.


Title: My wife is having an affair. Arizona.

Question: [removed]

Answer: Yes you would have some rights to the house. Particularly as you have been paying since you got out of school. That would be determined by a court.


Title: ~12 Year Old Misdiagnosis is Preventing Me From Enlisting in the Military. Please Help.

Question:
[removed]
Topic:
Medicine and Malpractice

Answer: You authorized them to have your medical records. They had no right to them before you signed a release of information. And, honestly, given all the diagnosis, you're very likely SOL on joining the military.


Title: About to get sued for TM Infringement (Texas)

Question:
I know this is lawyer territory but I have no money due to an unfortunate event recently so if there is anyway I can handle this on my own I appreciate your help.

Long story short, I use to have a website where I sold products and a supplier of mine from China sent me a new product and asked if I would like to sell it. I searched around for it and saw it was a copy of a product that had no patent, but it did have a trademark to it's name.

I'm an idiot and didn't think much through, so I put it on my website and changed the name a bit. So if their product was "Dog Whistle" mine was "Dog Blowing Whistle" or something like that. After about a week of selling it I received a DMCA takedown so I had to remove it from my website.

Now it has been about 9 months and I just received an email from a law firm with 2 different PDFs. One showing a document that they have prepared to submit to courts in Texas with a few different counts of trademark infringement and unfair practices, and one is a document from the lawyer asking to comply within 15 days with their demands or else they will take it to court.

They're asking for information on my supplier, me, finances from selling the product, etc. And after I submit it they will decide whether or not to go to court or whatever.

Should I send them all my information?

Answer:
 Not a lawyer, you probably shouldn’t listen to me but-

I BELIEVE They are trying to see if you are worth the time and effort to sue. So I would say it depends. Did you sell $1500 or $1500000? Bc one of those is worth a lawsuit and the other not so much. So if you think they may get the info and decide it may be worth the effort to sue you then do not give them jack squat until you must give them everything (warrant, court order, etc) not just bc they demand it in a nasty letter before they decide if they should file a lawsuit or not. But if you sold almost zilch and made next to or no money then by all means give them the info they want. If they will end up paying the attorney more than they will get I bet it will vanish. But this is just my unqualified opinion.


Title: [CA, USA] Just got in a car accident, other party admitted fault, car deemed a total loss, but their insurance company is low-balling me on my car's value. What can I do?

Question:
Topic:
Insurance

Answer:
 Choices:

1.) Accept the offer.

2.) Negotiate a better settlement.

3.) Sue.


Title: Mother is worried her husband will steal her house from under me when she dies, wants to transfer the ownership to my name.

Question: Hello good people of legaladvice! Long time listener, first time caller. Both me and my mother reside in NE, USA. The facts are as follows: she married her current husband about ten years ago, when I was in my early 20s. The house and mortgage is in her name only. She has a will that states the house goes to me when she passes. The house is currently still under a mortgage about half paid off. Her husband resides in the house, but does not contribute financially (he doesn't work much, is more of a stay at home... husband). They have no children together, I am an only child. My mother is afraid that if she passes, her husband may contest the will to fight to keep the house, so she wants to transfer the ownership into my name now to avoid that. My questions: what are the legal pros and cons of doing this? does legaladvice think the transferring of the deed is even necessary or worth it? Is there any other sub I should consult for further advice (such as taxadvice etc)? I guess if the ownership is transferred to my name, then I guess I would technically be her landlord and responsible for repairs/taxes/etc. My mother says that she'll still maintain the home and pay the taxes and I do believe her (you never know though), so is there anything I should do to prepare myself in case something should come up? If I decide to go through with it, what should I expect? Any advice is welcome! Thanks!

Answer:
 Your mother should look into putting the house in a trust. That is, the trust would legally own the house and you will be the beneficiary when she passes. But she could still live there and life would continue as normal. You would need to consult an estate planning attorney to structure this correctly.Answer #2: Legal advice, won't this make OP's mom a tenant?

If mom should predecease husband, will OP have to evict him? Or will he have the right to remain in the house for the remainder of his life?


Title: [US FL] Month to month lease, AC failed, property management/owner dragging their feet on the repair. Am I able to withhold rent and not get evicted?

Question:
We were on a one year lease, but that ran out, and we have been going month-to-month since.  I asked about renewing the lease, but they just never responded.  In central Florida, the AC is running, barely, the contractor said they would submit a quote to replace the system, which apparently happened, but it's been a month at this point and 0 progress  has been made.  I was told by the property management company that someone would be out last Friday to replace the system, only for them to not even give me a call saying they couldn't make it.
Upon calling the property management company today, I am informed that not only did they not have them scheduled to come out Friday, they didn't even have the parts required ordered and wanted me to take pictures to 'see what parts were needed', which is a blatant stalling tactic in my opinion as the contractor already submitted the quote.

What recourse do I have here?  My power bill is 50% higher than last month due to the AC system running more than 20 hours a day, the bill from last year for July was considerably less.  Is withholding rent even an option with a month-to-month lease?  I'm at a loss here.  Inside temperatures even with the AC on it's last legs are over 85^0 .  It's ridiculous and untenable that that could be considered a working AC system.

Help?  Please?

Answer:
 Because you are on a month-to-month lease, the landlord can terminate your lease each month. The landlord doesn't have to break a long term lease.

I'm not familiar with FL law about withholding rent for an AC repair, but it's actually beside the point. Even if you are allowed, the landlord can simply choose to not renew your lease after this month.


Title: [Idaho] - My phone number used to belong to a Chinese restaurant. I'm tired of getting calls for them. Can I "play along" legally?

Question:
Location: Idaho.  I'm guessing this is a bit of an oddball situation.

About a year ago, I got a new phone and a new-to-me phone number attached to it.  It's a very memorable phone number (five consecutive digits, wow) and I've been using it for a lot of my stuff.  I really don't want to change it.

The problem is, I quickly discovered that my phone number used to belong to a local Chinese restaurant.  I've contacted that restaurant and asked them to remove it from their advertising at least ten times, and they always say they'll do it.

They never seem to do it.

At least four times a week I get calls for this place.  Someone wants to order delivery.  The food suppliers are trying to schedule a shipment.  The online menu company wants to know if my menu is still current.  The owner used it for everything from his car insurance to his medical information - I even get automated calls telling me that his prescription is ready.  I get calls from the guy's school when his kids are in the principal's office.  Sometimes I even get calls with ladies screaming at me in Mandarin.

None of this is hyperbole.

I could just change my number, but I like this number and everybody I know has it now.  I've tried to be patient and polite and work with the restaurant, and they just don't seem to care.

So, being easily amused and childlike at heart, I would like to start "playing along" with these people.  I'd like to take the orders and give them a delivery time of sixty minutes.  I'd like to add items to the menu when asked.  I'd like to order a few more tubs of soy sauce for the next shipment.

Keep in mind, these people are calling me; I'm not initiating any of this myself.

My question is this: am I going to be breaking any laws by having some fun with this odd situation?  Is this the kind of thing I could get civilly sued over?  Or can I, in good conscience (and yes, it would make my conscience very, very happy after I've been so patient with the restaurant) play along with these phonecalls?

Answer:
 I think when you actually place fake orders at distributors, it moves out of the petty revenge territory and into actual monetary damages territory. Not sure if they can successfully sue but that would be an territory I would stay out of. Answer #2: I'm a bit surprised the restaurant isn't moving to update their phone number listings.  Tell them you usually ignore incoming calls from unknown numbers, and point out to them that each wrong-number call to you represents a lost sale to them. Resolving the wrong listings is a win/win/win situation for everyone involved, the customers looking for Chinese food, the restaurant, and you.

Answer #3: Go to the restaurant, speak to the manager, and show them your number on their ad/website/phone listing, whatever.  Extract a promise with a deadline for them to show you that they've changed their flyers/website/whatever.  You'll still get calls after the deadline because old ads are still around, and you're in some people's speeddial and whatnot, but you should address the problem instead of messing with innocent callers.

You said you've "contacted" them, by which I think you mean that you called them. That's rather low-effort, particularly considering you're calling a number meant for ordering.  Contact them by registered mail, speak with management in person, and if they are obstinate, ask for their lawyer's name and number so you can have your lawyer contact them.  If it comes to that, hire a lawyer to write a cease and desist letter.


Title: My dad stole thousands that I've inherited and I'm not sure if there's anything left.

Question:
Back in 2015, my mom died and I was underage at the time, so it was given to her mom, and the two of us were naive enough to give the money to my dad for when I'm 18. I was supposed to get 40K when I turn 18 and he never should have spent a single cent, but now I'm not even sure if I have even 10K left, he has spent so much on who knows what that I'm not sure if there's much of anything left.

I heard that would be classed as money laundering, any advice?

Oops, it all happened in Maine.

P.S. it was supposed to be put into a joint account between me and him, I found papers stating that it was only his money.

Answer: Super complex issue and not likely to be solved by the opinions here. The possibility of a positive outcome would be infinitely increased by speaking with an estate attorney. Answer #2: No, it's not money laundering; it would be theft and misappropriation. How old are you now, and how much, if any, do you value having a relationship with him?


Title: Showing receipt at Walmart

Question:
My bad if this is in the wrong sub.

Do I have to show my receipt to a Walmart employee as I leave the store? I walked out on a greeter practically blocking my way because I wouldn't show it and was told if I do it again I'll have the police called on me. I feel like this is total BS since they usually seem to be targeting certain people. I hate it and it's rather embarrassing having the stand there while they look around your bags, sometimes when moving things out of them.

I live in California, USA.

Answer: What is the big deal? It takes like 3 seconds to show your receipt...Answer #2: Do you know if it's standard procedure to ask all customers to show receipts upon exiting?


Title: I am renting an apartment above a local coffee shop. I recently caused water damage that leaked through and damaged the ceiling of the coffee shop below, causing them to close early. My insurance fully covered the damage but now the coffee shop owner is seeking lost revenue payment.

Question:
In the state of Indiana, US.

The title sums it up pretty much.

I flooded my washing machine (tried washing a comforter. Didn't end well) and the water leaked down into the ceiling below, which then in turned sprouted a leak into the coffee shop. As a result they decided to close six hours early.

It's my humble humble opinion that they did not need to close as the leaky ceiling was not over any food/cooking area and was contained with a bucket, but I don't run a coffee shop so what do I know.

Regardless repairs totaled $1600 and my insurance, USAA, fully covered that. I thought that was the end of it but earlier today the owner of the coffee shop approached me and wanted me to get in touch with my insurance to cover $700 in lost revenue as well as lost employee wages. I called up USAA and the verdict was that my renter's insurance policy doesn't cover things of that nature.

To be expected honestly. I let the coffee shop owner know, and he said that his next step was to see if his insurance will cover it or at least fight with mine, and finally that he would ultimately file a lawsuit against me if need be.

I'm sort of taken aback with all this and don't really know where I stand or what I should be doing at this point.

Additional information: The coffee shop owner didn't give me any paperwork for lost income. It was him just estimating as they closed six hours early.

My questions are:

1: Does he have to provide burden of proof that he "had" to close instead of choosing to if he decided to file a lawsuit?

2: If he has a lot of ground to stand on with this, would it be wiser to try and settle this by just giving him the lost revenue out of my own money? The amount thankfully isn't terribly high.

3: My insurance company also stated that I can just forward any lawsuits to them and they'll be able to try and handle it. Would I just be able to convince them that paying for the lost revenue would probably be cheaper on their end?

Answer:
 Let your insurance worry about that. They'll probably haggle over the amount. In the end, $700 is a drop in the bucket, or about 3 hours of an attorney's time. Answer #2: Your insurance company, which you should refer all communications to, likely had them sign a release of claims relating to the incident.  The shop likely can't just take another bite at the apple.Answer #3: USAA is an excellent insurer. Let them handle it.

The owner is probably required to have his own insurance for this.


Title: Mom arrested in PA for possession, intent to sell and conspiracy. I [NY] need some advice as the oldest of 6...

Question:
Hi reddit, need advice. I am the oldest of 6, my youngest siblings are elementary and middle school aged, the rest of us are adults in various phases in life, my youngest sister & I being the most established.

My mother has always been very selfish when it come to the pursuit of love, putting terrible men before anything (she mothers men and tries to mold them out of pity and desperation). It's all finally come to head as she was just arrested in another state after hooking up with an ex-con and trying to sell weed, something she has never done or even knows anything about.

She is a welfare/disability recipient and is still married to another scumbag who walked out on her several times (he is father to my youngest siblings). He was verbally abusive, constantly stealing and cheating but she was dumb enough to marry him anyway, he ran off with another woman shortly after marriage, its been maybe a year or 2, hard to remember as I've kept my distance, only interacting with my siblings and just recently trying to build a relationship with her again.

Where it stands now, she has a $25,000 bail and I don't know when she will be home, I don't know where to start to help her. On top of that, I am most fearful for my little brothers, they went through so much with the issues with their father and I'm scared a social worker will come and take them away as my mother was a hoarder to top everything off. I know first and foremost to clean up and my sisters and I have already discussed the game plan on this but from a legal standpoint, what can I do to keep my brothers with us? I'm so scared they will be taken away or worse, given over to their scumbag father that they themselves want nothing to do with. The apartment is in her name and from growing up in the welfare system, I know the second she misses an appointment her benefits will get cut off, including rent. It's a rent controlled apartment so I don't want my family to lose it. Even if we post bail, I know she can't come home for some time. Please help, I'm so lost and there is so much to be done. I know our lives will never be the same...

TL:DR - Mom, dumb and a hoarder hooked up with ex con, tried to sell drugs and got arrested. $25,000 bail in another state... She is currently married to another scumbag who ran off, scared for my little brothers future as they could end of in foster care or worse, please help.

Answer:
 1) Draft an emergency stipulated petition for custody in whatever county your mother lived in.  Go visit her and get her to sign it awarding full custody to you during the pendency of her incarceration.

2) Go to the county courthouse where she lived, go to the clerk's office and tell them that you need to file an emergency petition, and you need it ruled on that day.  They'll have someone in the domestic relations section come help you.

3) Take the kids home with you.  File to have her disability payments transferred to you, along with her welfare payments.  File for WIC to pay for your siblings' food.

4) Congratulate yourself on being a great sibling.

EDIT: Forgot to mention: the father of the kids, the scumbag?  I'm assuming neither you, your mother, nor your siblings has seen him recently or knows where he is, and is unable to contact him in connection with the petition.  That he abandoned his children is for the best in terms of getting your petition granted -- if he has regular contact, the court may want to hear from him.


Title: Legally can I take action for someone telling people I am pregnant?

Question:
(20 F, Missouri)
After we broke up I privately told my ex boyfriend I was pregnant with someone else’s child (this happened after the break up), he was convinced that it was his even though it wasn’t. I came to the decision to have an abortion and he told many of our friends and family and ever since I have been shut out by them. Telling him privately and thinking I could trust him I asked him multiple times not to tell people and I continually am asked about it now because he has told so many people. Is there any legal action I can take to make him stop or for him to face consequences for sharing such personal information?

Answer: He isn't your healthcare provider and had no other obligation to keep anything he told you private.


Title: Girlfriend got a ticket for speeding and a few details are wrong on the ticket.

Question: Last Thursday my girlfriend got a ticket in Florida for a decent amount. The officer who wrote the ticket got a some minors details wrong on the ticket such as color of vehicle and her race. From my *current* understanding, details on forms are taken seriously. With us being from a different state(Texas) is there a way to fight this and succeed or would it be more efficient to just pay the fine? Sorry if I'm missing some information or if my knowledge on how these things actually work.

Answer: Clerical errors won't invalidate a traffic ticket.


Title: Mom is being harassed for recording public meetings.

Question: So my mom lives in one of those Florida retirement communities (55 and above only). She runs the newsletter for the park and has set up an unofficial facebook page for the park. Residents, their families, and some of the residents of surrounding parks who join in park activities have joined but she has approval of who joins the group. At meetings for the housing association, she uses her iPad to record and stream the meetings to the facebook page for snowbirds and others who can't attend them in person. The chairman of the social activities committee has said that my mother is making trouble by recording the meetings. But, I mean, they're public meetings in a public place right? Can she get in trouble for this?

Answer:
 Are they holding the meetings in the street?

It may be a meeting that's open to the public, but that doesn't mean that it's "public." They can prohibit participants/audience members from recording -- in the sense that they can require her to leave if she refuses to stop recording.


Title: My previous apartment took personal property out of my old apartment before my 30 day notice was over. (Texas)

Question: I was on a month by month payment, and I had given them a 30 day notice to expire on March 10th. I went by to pick up some more things last night to an empty apartment. They threw everything away. I already prepaid for the month of February, and had talked to the office about my prorated rent for the ten days of March. I am not behind on payments. I moved most of the big stuff to my new apartment, but left some things there because I went out of town (and I'm pregnant, and I have a two year old, moving takes a long time). Since its the weekend I can't really call a lawyer until Monday. What are your suggestions? They took my first son's ultrasound pictures and trashed them! I can't get those back ever!

Answer: You can sue them for the value of the items they disposed of. You could also try calling the police and see what they say.Answer #2: Call the cops, you've been burglarized Answer #3: Leave messages at law offices, and start calling your ex landlord asking when he's going to dig your things out of the trash and clean them.Answer #4: The ultra sound pics: Call the Dr office. Often they keep copies.


Title: (California) Can landlords limit guests on the basis of inconveniencing other tenants (roommates)?

Question:
I'm living in a house with five other girls. Several months ago my landlords sent me an email informing me that I was no longer permitted to invite my boyfriend into the house, as the other girls didn't feel comfortable wearing "relaxed" clothing while he was present (lesson learned: living with conservative Christians is akin to living in a convent). My lease is technically month to month and I didn't want to go through the hassle of prematurely finding a new place, so I played along until I hit the sixty day mark, but when I brought this up again my house mates responded less than favorably. They're so used to having this male-free zone that they freaked when I talked to them about changing it. Now normally I'd say, sorry, not really my problem as there is nothing in my lease limiting visitors (and to my understanding, having guests is included in my right to quiet enjoyment, but I'd appreciate if someone could corroborate that for me). But here's my problem. There is a section in my lease that states:

>Quiet Enjoyment:
Landlord covenants that on paying the rent and performing the covenants herein contained, the Tenant shall peacefully and quietly have, hold, and enjoy the premises for the agreed term. The house rules are evident in treating other house mates with respect and consideration as it pertains to the living environment (ie: noise, no late night visitors, no male visitors in your bedroom, no overnight male visitors, no alcohol or smoking on premises, taking care of own property, etc.)."

I've tried talking to my house mates collectively to come up with a compromise, but every time we reach an agreement it seems like they (or the landlord) come up with something else to deter me from having him over. For example, I agreed to only have him over on the weekends and to let everyone know when he was over, but now one of them added that we should add a specific number of hours he could be over per weekend so that he's not present EVERY day of EVERY weekend, which seems like it's getting pretty ridiculous to me.

In any case, if all five of the other girls are against me on this issue, does that mean I'm in violation of being considerate of my house mates as stated in the lease? It sure didn't feel respectful or considerate to ME but like they say, majority rules. Still, I can't shake the feeling that my quiet enjoyment of the common areas has been infringed upon.

Answer:
 I don't see how the lease prohibits your boyfriend from visiting.

> no male visitors in your bedroom,  no overnight male visitors

Is "The exception proves the rule" i.e., the lease implies that male visitors are allowed, just not in your bedroom and not overnight. If you really want to make a stink of it, invite him over when you like, say that you won't agree to limitations that weren't in the original lease, and let them try and evict you. And by that I mean, they'd need to force the issue legally and not just tell you that you're evicted. Personally I'd rather find a new place to live because living with roommates who hate you isn't worth the trouble.

Ironically, letting the two of you hang out in your bedroom would be an easier way to let them have the common areas but of course then you might be having SEX.Answer #2: Seems pretty clear cut in their favour to me unfortunately. Perhaps you should start staying over at your boyfriends place instead?


Title: [Iowa] Ex-wife may try to move out of state with our child.

Question:
The quick and dirty:  We divorced a little over a year ago, with the custody plan giving both of us shared custody of our daughter (9 years old).  We alternate visitation each week between us and our parenting plan says that neither one of us can move out of the county without either the other parents permission or the permission of the court.  Shortly after the divorce, my ex met a guy through a dating site that lives in Minnesota (about 6 hours from where we live now) and got pregnant shortly after.  She now wants to move to Minnesota, with our child, to be with him.  She is ok with me moving too, but I have no desire to do so.  I'm decently employed, have my own relationship now, am going back to school to start a new career, and overall just trying to improve my life and provide for my child.

My question is, what are the chances of her successfully convincing the court to let her leave the state?  There is no job related reasons, no established family or any of the usual reasons it seems that a court might grant her wishes.  I am a good father, with many people who can testify on my behalf, so the welfare of our child is not in question either.

Answer:
 Not a lot IMO. The child has an established school, family, and friends in her current location. She also has a father there. The mother wants to move to live with a realtive stranger. It is her choice to move and there is no gain for your daughter to move. In order to move out of state the mother has to show how it will benifit the child (not the mother).

You would be best served by hiring an attorney to fight this fight for you. You have a good case but that doesn't guarentee anything.


Title: Ex-girlfriends mom was paying on bed I got on credit card and didn't pay the late fees. Now I'm stuck with the aftermath.

Question:
My ex and I bought a bed from Mattress Express in November of 2016. She and I split in May of 2017. I agreed with her to keep the bed since I had originally purchased it for her back. My mother, her mother, her, her sister, and I were all there during this arrangement. We agreed that M (exes mom) would pay the bed off in full so that my ex could keep it, seeing as I'm not going to make payments on a bed I'm not in possession of. (I should have just taken the bed in hindsight).

Fast forward a few months, everything is going smoothly. On August 14 I messaged M about the payment due the next day and she told me she was out of town and that she'd be back the following weekend. Okay? She should have written me the check before she left for me to deposit on the day it's due. That's not what happened. M got back 9 days after the due date (August 23) and we agreed on a date to meet for me to grab the check to deposit and make that months payment. That's the first late payment.

September 14, I messaged M about the payment as I was sick with food poisoning. I told her I could mobile deposit and it would still go through. M told me she was unable to get me the check again until a later date. I agreed as I had no other option and I was too weak to argue since I'd been throwing up every half hour for almost 3 days at that point. That's another late fee.

Fast forward some more to October. M wrote out 3 checks for the next few payments but the late fees weren't added. I told her the remaining balance and she still only wrote out the amount to pay the balance I had told her when she took over the payments. With the late fees after all the checks were cashed there was $100 left and I contacted her November 12 (3 days before the payment was due). No response.

I have all the texts coordinating the payments and when she was late and why. M could have dropped off the checks before she left town or asked me to pay it until she could reimburse me, but I was hesitant to spend money out of my own pocket to pay off 'their' bed.

I contacted her this morning about the interest charged since the bed wasn't completely paid off and the late fees attached. She's ignoring the fact that she gave her word that "I would pay off the balance. So no matter what I intend on doing that." That includes late fees since she was too busy to contact me and relay that she wouldn't be able to make the payments that month on time. She insists that she should only have to pay the starting balance of what was owed when she agreed to take up the payments and everything after that is up to me.

I'm not sure what to do and now the balance is climbing with late fees and interest. I know I should make the payments asap, but I don't want to pay the $400 balance and not be compensated or have the bed in my possession.

 I am in Alabama and would love to know what legal options I have and what I should look out for because M threatened me with an attorney for requesting that she pay off the remaining balance and fees.

Answer: Your agreement with M is none of the credit card company’s or the bed company’s business. You’re legally on the hook for the bed, so pay it off. Then look into your options to recover against M for breach of contract (which you may have trouble with since nothing was expressly agreed as to who would be responsible if here were late fees).


Title: (South Carolina) Is my employer allowed to force an omission of overtime?

Question: I work for a recruitment agency in a contract to hire position for another company. I am in training but I assume overtime works the same as doing actual work in this scenario. My first week I had an hour of overtime that was approved and I received payment for. At the end of my second week I was contacted by the recruitment agency and asked to remove all overtime as that needed to be approved through the host company. The problem is, I'd already worked those hours. I complied not wanting to cause any issues with my pay, but I can't shake the feeling that I was robbed of 3.5 hours. There may be a clause in my employment contract that states overtime must be approved, but if I've already worked those hours am I wrong to feel slighted?

Answer:
 >but I can't shake the feeling that I was robbed of 3.5 hours.

You were.  If you worked the hours, you're entitled to be paid for them.  You can file a wage claim over those overtime hours.

You also can be fired for working unapproved overtime.  You should likely be very careful about your hours worked in the future to ensure that you receive approval before working overtime.


Title: Is it legal for police to go through peoples phones? Anywhere on the planet

Question:
Recently after the Sri Lanka bombings, police have been going door to door in my area (close to the bombing), searching the entire house for anything beyond a kitchen knife and confescating it.
Then they ask to see our phones, go through everything on our phones. If we refuse they seize the phone and arrest people for 14 days until you are heard. Ofc not wanting to be arrested and being innocent, many family members of mine obliged.

But is this not against human rights?
Can this be legal anywhere on the planet?

Answer:
 > But is this not against human rights? Can this be legal anywhere on the planet?

Human rights are defined differently by different governments. I don't think anyone here is an expert on Sri Lankan law.


Title: Landlord did not respond to urgent plumbing issue in a sufficient manner, most of my belongings have been lost because of this and I have now fallen ill

Question:
I live in an apartment in philadelphia. Last Friday my neighbor from the apartment next to mine called our landlord because the toilet in his apartment wouldn't flush. The landlord sent a technician and the technician snaked the pipe at the bottom of the toilet and said the issue shouldn't happen again. The next day my neighbor experienced the same issue and called the landlord for a technician again. The technician snaked the drain even harder and managed to get the water to go down. He said the issue was with the entire plumbing system and it was an issue that would have to be looked into Monday.

Sunday morning around noon both my and my neighbor's toilets, tubs, and sinks started filling up with water. We both called the landlord and they sent a technician out about 30 minutes after my call. The technician said they would need a plumber to look into the issue and they should be here within 2 hours.

The technician left and after 3 hours no technician showed up. I know our neighbor was constantly calling the main office and trying to get someone to come again as the issue continued to get worse. At this point the water pouring out had become sewage. I called the landlord's office again as the sewage was approaching the exit of the bathroom. They said they will get in contact with the technician again and have him reach out to us. After 20 minutes the issue just kept getting worse and I realized that the apartment along with all my belongings might be in danger. I called the office again and stressed that the entire apartment was in danger. They said they would try reaching out to the technician again and hung up.

A few minutes later the technician called back and said he was still waiting for the plumbing company that the apartment used to have someone available. I said that the issue is getting out of hand at this point and someone needs to come over. I had built a dam of towels keeping the sewage in the bathroom and at this point there was about an inch and a half of water. I asked if the technician could at least bring some towels so that we could slow down the water. He said that he didnt have any towels.

My neighbor and I waited for the technician and after about 20 minutes or so someone from our landlord's office called and apologized for the situation and said that the landlord would pay to fix any damage to the apartment, but for now we have to wait for a plumber.

Another half an hour or so passes and the technician showed up again. He walked in to both our bathrooms that were overflowing with sewage and we could tell he was surprised by the severity issue even after we had described it to the landlord. He said there was nothing he could do but try contacting a plumber. After another hour and a half or so a plumber finally showed up, and so did the woman who contacted us from the landlord's office (it took them 6 hours total to get a plumber for the issue). They all told us to put our important belongings up high and they would take care of the damages to the apartment.

At this point I started moving all of my belongings out of the apartment. I asked if there was any way I could get any towels to help slow down the water, and was told that there is nothing they can do but they'll pay for the damages to the apartment whenever the water stopped. At this point I was carrying my most expensive belongings outside planning to store them in my car for safety. No one offered any help and they just watched me walk through sewage for about 2 hours carrying my belongings out.

No one told us the severity of the issue, but the plumber couldn't get the water to stop until there was 6 inches of sewage and the sewage covered the entire bottom floor of the apartment building. Needless to say nearly anything left in the apartment is now trash.

On top of that I've been sick for the past 3 days constantly vomiting and with terrible diarrhea. I've gone to a doctor and I needed to get blood work done to learn the severity of my illness. The test results aren't back yet.

Is this an issue I should persue legal action over? Is the landlord responsible for any more than just the damage to the apartment?

Answer: Even if no wrongdoing, you need a lawyer and your insurance company.  Answer #2: If you have renter's insurance, file a claim with them.  Answer #3: This seems egregious enough that you may well have a claim against the landlord for all damages you suffered. I would start by figuring what this cost you and asked landlord to compensate you. If you are unable to come to some agreement, you can sue him in landlord tenant court and let a judge decide.


Title: [Texas] - My Taxes state I am MARRIED? (I'm NOT) Common Law FAFSA.

Question:
If this doesn't belong in this sub-reddit, forgive me.

My fiance and I have been together for 11 years. We have been living together for 3 years.
We have only recently got engaged.
We don't plan to actually marry for atleast another 5-10 years from now.
We are 28.

This current fall semester, I have qualified for a student Pell grant from FAFSA.

Now that I am applying for FAFSA for the Spring semester, I find out through the IRS transfer tool that I am apparently married...?

Since we understand nothing of taxes ourselves, we went to H&RBlock last tax season for a expert to handle it for us. When we did our taxes at H&RBlock we were informed that we could file together regardless of the fact that we weren't married, that my fiance could claim me as a dependent or something rather, I have the paperwork of details but don't understand any of it.

Apparently they must have claimed us as common law married ...?

I don't want this to affect my financial aid, and I am very confused as FAFSA asks me for the date we got married.
How can you state a date of marriage that doesn't exist?

My fiances income for last year was 34k.
We do not own a home.
We rent a cheap, small apartment.
We own a old beat up car that won't last much longer.
We have no debt, and have never touched anything regarding our credit (besides phone bill, which they state I have great credit with them since I've never missed a bill and always pay a month ahead).

I'm currently unemployed due to a injury while moving, and lacking insurance to get proper treatment.

Are we married?
When did we get married?
Will this affect my Pell grant and Fafsa?
If we are married, if we ever separated in the future, do we have to get divorced?

Should I just go directly to FAFSA or IRS or H&RBlock and ask them all of this?

Why is this so freaking confusing???
(hopefully I'm not missing any important information or questions)

Thanks a bunch in advance for any advice you can offer.

Answer:
 First, this may be an error.  You should have a competent tax attorney review your tax paperwork to determine whether you claimed to be married.

Texas is a state that recognizes common-law marriage.  You become common-law married when you decide you are married, live together as if you are married, and hold yourselves out as married.  In other words, if you pretend to be you are.

In this case, if you filed taxes as if you're married, that'd pretty much cover it.  You can certainly challenge that, but then you have to explain why you lied on your taxes.  Answer #2: > we went to H&RBlock last tax season for a expert to handle it for us

They are not experts. The company hires data entry people to use their software (you or I could get jobs doing it). As others have said you need a real tax expert, or a tax attorney, or at least a CPA to go over this and you'll likely need to re-file your taxes.Answer #3: Get your copy of the tax forms you submitted last year. Find the one that says “1040” at the top. At the beginning of the form there’s a section that says “Filing Status.” What box is checked in that section?


Title: Being Asked To Sign An Amended Employee Handbook Without Being Told What They've Changed

Question:
The company I work for has just issued a new copy of the employee handbook and asked us all to sign it, however none of the management staff are able to tell me what they've changed.

They expect us to read the new copy in full and sign to confirm that we agree to it all. The thing is, this is a 64 page document that covers everything from the way wages are handled, to sick pay, holiday allowance policies, dress codes, drug testing etc...

I'm just the average person and surely can't be expected to re-read this entire document and cross reference it with the previous version in order to try and work out what they've changed, right?

Naturally I'm skeptical about all this, as I know this company and find it hard to believe they'd bother changing this handbook in any way unless it somehow benefited them...

Thanks for your help in advance!

Answer:
 It doesn't matter what they changed since you have to accept the entire handbook. Reading it would be in your best interest.Answer #2: ...Why can't you just read the new handbook? Shouldn't take more than an hour. Not sure why a "cross reference" is necessary, this really isn't complicated.Answer #3: So don't sign it if you don't want to. You can be legally fired for that. Nothing in an employee handbook could override the law, so if it said something like "if you're late to work you don't get paid for the day" that would never be enforceable. Answer #4: Surely you CAN be expected to read it.Answer #5: Read it on company time, when you'd normally be browsing reddit.

If they've provided electronic versions, it would be fairly easy to compare.


Title: Is it legal ,as a cop, to intentionally harass known criminals until they threaten him by using a fake profile?

Question:
This is in OR

A cop at the local PD was talking the other day and said his fellow officer has a fake Facebook page and uses it to argue with known criminals (mostly junkies and mentally ill) around here and harasses them until they threaten him with a public fight. One story I heard about yesterday involved a couple that he pissed off by talking shit about their dead cancer-ridden son until they said they'd meet him somewhere to "beat his ass". I feel this is an ethical issue, but is it a legal one?

Answer: I don't think that rises to the level of entrapment as the other commenter said. However, I think that would be intentionally harassing someone and the officer himself could be charged for that. You can also report him to his supervisor.


Title: Should I be getting paid?

Question:
So, currently working part time at a gas station for income while playing phone tag with a bank. Position is for nights and weekends, normally 2-11pm. However, first 90 days is probationary so your pay doesn't get taxed. However, you are expected to show up 15-30 minutes early to get tobacco, lottery, and drawer counts done so the other person can leave on time. Then you'll spend another 10-30 minutes after your shift finishing counts and any other cleanup you might have needed. After all this, even if I actually worked 1:35 to 11:25 for example, I'm still only being paid 2-11. We are paid weekly and given a letter that shows our pay and for how many hours. We write our times on a time card, and get paid directly from the register drawer. I was wondering how legal this actually is. I don't want to try to fight it at all because it's my only source of income even though I don't plan to stay. Any advice would be appreciated.

I had originally posted this in /r/personalfinance here: https://np.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/3wcwdk/shouldnt_i_be_getting_paid/ but I was told that I should post it over here instead in regards to reporting it and that whole procedure.

This is all happening in Michigan in the US.
Topic:
Tax Law

Answer: Just about everything you've described here sounds very illegal. You should go to Michigan's Wage and Hour Division ASAP.


Title: Was going to receive a veneer by the dentist, but he told the insurance company it was a crown. I ended having to pay $200 more than I planned for because he committed insurance fraud and now the veneer has messed up my teeth.

Question:
This happened about a year ago in NYC. I wish I did something right away regarding this, but I'm a pretty passive (and maybe not the smartest?) person and wanted to pretend that things a fine, but now my teeth are getting worse so it's hard to ignore.

First off, I have a deep bite that's never really bothered me. This is the first time I'm seeing this guy, and this dentist keeps pressuring me about getting invisalign, which he can conveniently do in his office and would be about $5000. I pretty much live paycheck to paycheck, so I declined him politely every time he brings it up.

Now onto the veneer: I chipped my front tooth as a child, and have a filling there. For some reason, a part of my real tooth chipped off a little bit on the same tooth, but didn't bother me at all. He wants remove the filling and put on a veneer, but I declined because I just wanted a cleaning and check up, plus it didn't bother me, plus I'm broke as all hell. He said he would submit it to the insurance company so I could see how much it would be out of pocket for me. The dental office calls me up saying I would have to cover $400 if I got the veneer. I mention this to my parents (I was 24 at the time, living in a different city), and my mom said to just get the veneer and they would cover it. And I was like okay, what do I have to lose then? So my parents give me $400, I get the procedure done, and afterwards the dentist says it's going to be $600. I'm like what? And the dentist says they submitted it as a crown, since the insurance considers veneers cosmetic and wouldn't cover it. I'm a giant push over and just wanted to get out of there so I paid the $600. So not only did they bullshit me out of $200 and commit insurance fraud, it's been a year later and my teeth have gotten slowly fucked up from this veneer. It's been hitting my bottom tooth at a bad angle, because of the deep bite, and since's its a harder material than my old filling, it's been wearing down the bottom tooth. I also feel like at times that my bottom tooth is going to fall out every time I bite down and that its making my deep bite much worse all around. It also looks terrible, though my teeth were never pretty, this made it worse. He definitely should not have given me a veneer until the deep bite was fixed, but probably wanted the quick money.

I was wondering if there were actions I could take, especially since it's been a year. Should I report him to the insurance company? Would I have enough grounds to sue for the pain and suffering? I have not been back to see him since, since my insurance switched in January and I no longer have the PPO. I'm also going to see another dentist to get their opinion on the damage done. I really just want my teeth fixed, but have no confidence in going back to him to do it.

Answer:
 See a medical malpractice attorney.Answer #2: [Here is a link to a NYC Bar Association page with statutes of limitations, scroll down for medical malpractice] (http://www.nycbar.org/get-legal-help/article/personal-injury-and-accidents/statutes-limitation/) It says that you have 2.5 years, so it might be a very good idea to get in touch with an attorney. Answer #3: Did you not go back for a follow up after getting it?  Or at least a 6 month check up?  If not, go to a dentist to get it adjusted.  They can grind it down so it will stop rubbing the bottom.

Answer #4: Not a lawyer. Dental student here.

It is common knowledge amongst dentist that the ceramic layer of crowns/veneers is stronger than the enamel of your natural teeth. If not adjusted correctly this will cause wear on the opposing dentition. Usually the bite is adjusted to minimize occlusion on the teeth with veneers. In fact, if there is abnormal occlusion a veneer would be contraindicated. I am honestly surprised that the dentist did not mention this to you when he placed the veneer. Especially considering your deep bite.

If what you really want is to get your smile fixed you may need to get crowns on the lower teeth to restore their height. Depending on the condition of those teeth...

Sorry you're going through this. You should post your question on /r/dentistry. I'm sure they'd be interested and maybe offer more insight from dentistry perspective.
Good luck!Answer #5: Contact the body that regulates the dentist's license. I think it's the Department of Health but if not, it's the Office of the Professions at the NYS Education Department.


Title: first time b being charged with public intoxication. Ongoing security clearance At current job wv

Question:
So my buddies and me went out last night and got really hammered and I ended up throwing up in public and some of it got on an officers shoes. I woke up the next morning in a hospital bed and had a misdemeanor ticket.

The guy I was with works for the same govt. Agency I work with and he said he's had 2 PI charges and its not a big deal and it'll be like a traffic ticket. I will report this to my manager on Monday but I was wondering if this will

1. Have an impact on my current job

2.  Stop me from being able to get my top secret clearance that is currently ongoing. I already have secret.

3. Stop me from being hired at future jobs
Topic:
Alcohol Related Other than DUI

Answer:
 It's a criminal offense, so you'll want to get it mitigated. It *may* impact your current job. It *may* impact your security clearance. It *will* impact your future.

If you cannot afford an attorney, you should request a public defender.


Title: Walking on private property (France)

Question:
I live in Normandy France. I walk my dog daily on a path beside farmers land and that of a horse breeder that people are allowed to use as its the ancient road between our village and the next.

However I like to leave that path towards the end and finish my walk down the grand driveway of this very wealthy horse farm. It's about 500m long in the section I walk and is lined with very impressive trees. It's relaxing and I like to chill out there before I go home.

I normally walk there between 1930 and 2130 when its silent but today I walked there between 1730 and 1830. When there is the occasional car going either way. A guy stopped said it was private and told me I had to go the other way. I agreed that it was private but insitied on carrying on my walk as planned. Nothing more was said.

I have previously looked into French law on the subject of trespass and so far have seen nothing that makes it a crime.

Does anyone have any info? What are the potential repercussions in France to walking on private property knowingly?

No damage caused, dog on lead, mess collected.

Thank you

Answer:
 Stay off other people's property if you don't have consent.

Edit: or an easement.


Title: Does a biological father have any rights over knowing the gender of an unborn baby?

Question:
If two people are having a child, but are no longer together, does the biological father need the permission of the mother to know the gender of his child?

Mother wants to wait, but the father wants to know, and argues that it is his right to know just as much as it is the mother’s right to not know. He believes that they can both have what they want, but it’s hard to find actual laws regarding whether he’s entitled to know this about his child.
Topic:
Custody Divorce and Family

Answer:
 Paternity won't be established until after the child is born, so at this point the father has no rights at all.Answer #2: To save you another post later on: He has no right to be present when you are giving birth either.Answer #3: No. He has no right to info about her body.

Until the child is born, it is her medical infoAnswer #4: The mother has 100% authority on decisions of this nature, regardless of relationship status. Even if they were married he would have no right to that information or to force her to have test that would indicate gender.Answer #5: No, the father has no right to any information until the child is born. She can ban him from every appointment, not share ultrasounds, and ban him from the delivery if she wants.Answer #6: No, they don't have any right to know that.


Title: Hospital refusing to release medical records to the VA so the VA won't pay.

Question:
I have VA health insurance. I eat something and have an allergic reaction to a medication I was taking for the first time. My heart starts beating and I become confused. The closest hospital is banner thunderbird hospital, so we call an ambulance because driving wouldn’t be safe. Go to emergency room survive, but know not to take that medication again.
	The VA requires that you always go to them unless you have a life threatening emergency. I tell Banner my insurance is VA and they need to contact them. Banner starts sending me bills in 10K range. I call them and explain to them that they need to send the bills to the VA. I bring the bills to the VA anyways to start the process. VA tells me to tell banner to send over my medical records. I call banner and tell them this. They said no VA needs to send them a letter saying they are going to pay them first. I try to explain that the VA needs my record to make sure it was an emergency before they will pay. They say no they’ve dealt with the VA before they need to approve the payment before they will release my records.
	VA also send them a letter explaining they need the records. Banner still refuses. Today I got letter from the VA telling me my claim is denied because banner refused to submit medical records to them after a 30 day written notice. Banner has reported me to a collection agency.
	What can I do? I understand someone is liable for that money, but I did everything in my power to try to get my insurance company to pay for it, but the hospital refused to cooperate. Am I screwed? What if I hit a car and the guy refused to accept payment and went after me for the money. Is that possible? Please help and thank you.

Answer: Is there a reason you didn't request your medical records yourself and send them to the VA? You should appeal the VAs decision and go to Banner to get your records to send them.


Title: Need advice for ex wife not signing 2013 state tax papers for me to file.

Question:
Hello, I am recently divorced. My exwife is supposed to sign the tax papers but she has yet to do so. Its for the 2013 year and i cannot file 2013 state taxes until i have her signature and her W2's. My lawyer has sent word to her lawyer since the beginning of the divorce and she refuses to sign them and give me her W2's. Im located in West Virginia. Can someone give me some advice?
Topic:
Tax Law

Answer: You could always file "Married filing Separately" and let her work out her own taxes.


Title: I am a 13 year old boy. I want to trade a computer I have with another kid (same age) for his iPad. But I am worried about getting sued by his parents or something. Would a video of the trade suffice or would I need to write a contract?

Answer: Asking both his and your parents would be the smart move. His parents could "reverse" the trade for sure.Answer #2: Have your parents talk to his parents. Then it is all fine. But no video can stop the parents from wanting a game back that they did not approve of you taking in trade


Title: Emulating Polygamy

Question:
So here's an interesting question: is it possible to emulate polygamy in the western world by somehow conferring some or all of the rights and responsibilities of marriage to another person in addition to a legal spouse?
In particular - full or partial rights and responsibilities to a child.

Answer:
 "Western World" -- most of us can't stand each other, let alone share universal laws.

In the United States, AFAIK, no. Parents have parental rights; those are only given up or transferred in extraordinary circumstances, and then only by the courts (or God, in the case of death). Same with marital rights -- the state will recognize you being married to one person or no persons, and the rights are bundled.


Title: Mom with Alzheimer's keeps trying to change her will, add codicils, give heirlooms to different people.

Question:
A few years before she was diagnosed she had her entire estate plan done thoroughly with a will, Medical POA, Durable POA (financial), etc. I am both her Medical and financial POA. When she was diagnosed I asked her if she wanted me to let her change things in her will etc and she said no, not to let her and to talk her out of it. So now of course, as dementia sets in, she has already written a codicil, wants to rewrite her entire will, wants to give heirlooms to different people, etc. In short, I was already so stressed out dealing with it but now she is creating such a legal nightmare that dealing with trying to execute her will some day (which is on me, of course) will be an absolute shit show of lawsuits and will contests. There is already almost no way for me to properly pay her bills without it pissing one of her "heirs" off that I spent the money or sold the asset she decided in dementia to give to them. I just want to walk away from the whole shit show to be honest. It's not worth my health, getting ulcers, etc but there is nobody else that can do it for her.
I don't know what to do, and I can't use my own money on paying a lawyer to help me out.

Answer:
 Unless your Mom actually finds an attorney to draft new documents, don't worry about it.  Let her talk and plan all she wants.   Don't argue.  Just give neutral responses like, "how interesting" or "that sounds lovely".

If she does find an attorney who appears willing to perform these services, your best bet is to share with him/her a statement from her physician with her diagnosis, the date of the diagnosis, and verbiage to the effect that she is no longer able to manage her business or health decisions.
Answer #2: I have been caretaker of someone with dementia. It chews you up and spits you out and does affect your own health.

On advice of my attorney, I talked to the person's physician (I had medical POA) and got letters from two physicians stating that the person was no longer competent to handle legal and financial affairs. I forget how it was worded; the physicians used some sort of boilerplate they had. I had the letters in reserve, in case someone contested the will. Here is the law that governs mental capacity to make a will:https://law.justia.com/codes/california/2007/prob/810-813.html

In any case, she can't alter her will, add a codicil, or make a new one without having her signature witnessed by two people. Among other things, the witnesses must agree that "We believe the maker is of sound mind and memory."

She can make a holographic (handwritten) will. It must be 100% in her writing, say specifically that it is her will, and should be dated to show tat it was written after any other will. Someone has to swear that, yes, it's really her handwriting. You are not obligated to tell her about this option.

You can take any mention of specific gifts as advisory, unless it's written in her will.


Title: Police Harrasment in CA (Bay Area)

Question:
Hello All,

&#x200B;

First time posting here, I recently relocated to California (Bay Area) and moved into a nice area.  The area I live in is considered wine country and a much more "Upper Class" area.  I am a person of color and I am driving an older car to and from work as well, which is not "normal" I would assume for that area.

&#x200B;

Since this past Sunday I have been followed 3 times by the same Sherriff and pulled over once.  Initially it all began on Sunday (4/14/19) when I was driving near my home and was pulled over while waiting at a left turn.  Stopped in a shopping center parking lot and the Sheriff came up to my window asked me for license and insurance and then asked if I was on probation or parole.  He then went back to his car, checked my record came back and asked if he knew why I was stopped.  I told him no and he told me that my third break light was out.  I know that this is something that I can get pulled over for.  He did not give me a ticket and let me go.  I went straight to the closest car parts store and purchased a replacement after verifying it was out.

&#x200B;

4/16/19 - 3 Days later I was near my home about to make a u-turn into a gas station and the same police officer pulled up behind me at the red light, made a u-turn as well with me but did not follow me into the gas station.  He proceeded down a block then made another u-turn and continued on his original course.  Suspicious, but I thought maybe a coincidence.

&#x200B;

4/19/19 - Driving to work near my house the same police man was on the lane to the right of me about 2 cars in front.  I noticed him looking at his side mirror towards me.  When the light turned green he slowed down and pulled up behind me and followed me for sometime.  I was nearing my destination and proceeded to switch to the left lane and he switched as well and finally a block away from where I was going he turned into a left lane and turned.

&#x200B;

It does feel like this is starting to be harassment.  What I have done so far is I did take an initial picture when I was pulled over with me and the sheriff vehicle while he was running my record and it shows the vehicle number.  I have kept a running document with times, locations, and events.  I purchased a dash and rear camera that should arrive today and will be installing tomorrow.

&#x200B;

My question is, what other precautions should I take in order to ensure that I am protected just in case.  Any advice would be greatly appreciated.  Thank you!

Answer: So you got pulled over for a valid reason and get let off with a warning, and have seen the guy around twice after that and he hasn't stopped you or bothered you in any way. Not sure that constitutes harassment


Title: My cousin's 13 year old daughter told her teacher that her mother's boyfriend was molesting her. CPS didn't remove her and the police said there was no evidence. She just gave birth to his baby.

Question:
My sister has temporary guardianship and is hoping to get permanent custody. I want to help in any way I can but I feel like I am in over my head. I know we probably need a lawyer but I don't even know where to start. We want to take action against the Michigan CPS department and the police and make sure they pay for this and that it never happens again.

CPS didn't remove her from the home during the investigation and the police didn’t interview her or her teacher. Her mom tried to hide her pregnancy. A nurse called the police after she gave birth when my cousin's daughter told the nurse she was being molested. Her mother was telling people the father was a 14 year old boy from school. A paternity test has proved the boyfriend is the father. What kind of lawyer do we even need for this?

Thank to anyone who helps. I just want what is best for my cousin's daughter.

Answer: I'd be less worried about CPS and more concerned with charges against your cousin and the boyfriend. Have any been filed?


Title: American Company Claims My (Canadian) Youtube Channel's Social Media Infringes On Their Copyright. What Do I Do?

Question:
I'll try to be brief: my friend and I started a youtube channel in July 2015, we make lots of different stuff, but mainly podcasts, gaming content, and short films. We both live in Canada, and all our content is made and uploaded from Canada. The channel name is The Neon Carnival, all our social media is branded @TheNeonCarnival.

Come to find out, there is a Coachella afterparty named NEON CARNIVAL and they aren't too happy that our names are similar. We get tagged in Instagram posts from the event. Just today they sent us an Instagram private message asking us to stop using their copyright material. Here's the message:  [https://imgur.com/a/lv5AIBc](https://imgur.com/a/lv5AIBc)

What are they legally allowed to do? Can this be fought? Is it worth registering our own name under Canadian Copyright law? I would appreciate any help I can get.
Topic:
Canada

Answer: This is not a copyright dispute but a trademark dispute. With trademarks, unlike copyrights, enforcing them in this manner is how you maintain them. You would need a trademark attorney to fight this, as undoubtedly Coachella has a team of them.


Title: Overseas Active Duty Spouse Looking for a Divorce

Question:
The basic details: her home of record is Illinois. I don’t have a home of record but I have a drivers license from Texas. I originally claimed residency in Florida. We have a number of joint assets that I’m willing to just give up to her (401k, etc). I’ll take on our only debt, which is my car payment. We have two kids and I’m willing to give her custody only because I don’t want to put my kids through a long protracted custody battle.

The story: my wife and I have been married about 5 years. Without the gory details, she isn’t the same person I married. She’s negative, yells at me and the kids all of the time, to include in public. She gaslights me. She doesn’t trust me although I’ve never really given her a reason not to. I dread even coming home from work. I decided that the best thing for me and the kids’ development is for me to leave. When I finally told her yesterday, she went off the rails, at one point ripping my ring off my finger, hitting me in the back, throwing my stuff out of the closet, to beginning me not to go and calling me a failure. This decision has been in my mind for a few years and I finally have had enough.

I don’t even know where to start. I have a job here in Germany with the DoD and plan on staying. I can most likely get housing. I just don’t know how or where or even what to do in order to get a divorce.

Can you guys / gals help?

Answer:
 > We have two kids and I’m willing to give her custody only because I don’t want to put my kids through a long protracted custody battle... I dread even coming home from work. I decided that the best thing for me and the kids’ development is for me to leave.

Not legal advice, but please seek out some relationship/parenting advice, as well as counseling.  If she's petty and emotionally unstable, then how would you giving up custody help them?  Please consider that rolling over and "giving your wife everything" might look like the easiest way out right now, but you might regret it later.  All I'm saying is, get some distance from the situation so you have better perspective before you make big decisions.


Title: My friend is going to tell a university on her ex-boyfriend and possibly make him lose a degree, what should she do?

Question:
My friend is going to tell her university that she she aided with her ex-boyfriends assignments and possibly end up making him lose it. Her ex treated her very poorly, blaming her for issues that should not be her's to deal with, and generally treating her like she was non-human towards the end of her relationship. I've been suggesting to her to simply let it go and move on.

Her ex's behavior is very distasteful and would probably not get him very far in life, but she still can't accept the fact that he has a degree that he did not earn. What should she do? This is happening in the UK.

Answer:
 This will literally do nothing. Her ex-boyfriend has little to worry about unless she has actual evidence that he plagiarized his papers.

How easy would it be to call a university and say “so and so got help on all his homework! Kick him out!”? I’d assume very easy as almost everyone has a cell phone.

If I were the ex-boyfriend I would call the police and keep a paper trail of all the bullshit she tries to pull.Answer #2: You are hearing one side of the story. While he may sound borderline psychotic to you, you also have a person who is trying to seek vengeance against someone. That is not exactly a healthy behavior.

If she tells on him, and she has no evidence, then nothing will happen to him. However, If she attended the same school she will get in trouble too. If she attended a different school, the school she tells could decide to report her. Since she will have confessed to cheating that is all the evidence that her university will need to consider revoking her degree.

If the guy is psychotic, he absolutely could go nuts over something like this.

She would be better off not poking the bear. Revenge doesn't tend to work out the way people hope it will.


Title: [CA] Stolen phone and I know the name of who did it

Question: Today I was on the bus and had my phone stolen. I was able to find his name through the yearbook as he goes to the same school. What steps should I take to get my phone back or is it a lost cause and I should just report him.

Answer: Call the police and / or report it to the school administration.


Title: I need help on what to do here

Question:
So there is this app called Yubo and it is an app where you can meet new friends and talk, the app is designed for people age 13-17. One of my good friends was on there and he was messing around. (He is 14 if that matters) He was making all of us laugh by saying funny things to people but he ended up taking it to far. He then said “show me your t*ts” to someone as a joke.  Now (a day later) he is afraid that he is going to become a sex offender. Is this possible?
Topic:
Criminal Law

Answer: Yep. You, and all your friends, should delete the app, turn over your phones and stay off internet.


Title: If my neighbors dog comes into my yard and my dogs attack it am I liable for damages or legal issues?

Question:
The context is my neighbors have this cute little chihuahua mix that just runs around the neighborhood. He comes into my yard a few times a day to do his business. I don't care. I have 5 dogs. One more dog pooping doesn't make a difference. But the issue is my pit bull and my chihuahuas are territorial and anytime i let them out and the neighbors dog is in my yard they chase him out. I believe of my pit caught him it wouldnt be pretty but she stops as soon as he leaves the yard.

Sooo. What if my dog catches him and hurts or kills him while he is on my property? Am I in trouble? I live in Phoenix Arizona btw.

Answer: 86 the beware of dog signs. Get no trespassing signs. This way you don't make your dog look evil and give people a leg to stand on in court.


Title: My step mum won't show me my dads will and I'm a beneficiary

Question: My dad died in June 2015 He told me a was a bencficiary along with my sister it's been nearly 5 months since he died and my step mum won't show me his will she has told both me and my sister what we are getting over the phone but she told me one thing and my sister something different I've phoned my dad soilcter and he told me he can't show me the will as my step is the  executor  Of the will and he would need her permission to show me it, she has refused to show it and she is making clear she does not like myself or my sister. I'm wanting some advise on what to do because I'm lost and I've never been in a position like this before I've tried to find my dads will on a .gov website find a will but there are no records of his his propate

Answer: /r/LegalAdviceUKAnswer #2: We need to know what state you're in. Probate filings are in the county court so you would search for your county clerk of courts and then search their probate filings for your dad's probate pleadings.


Title: Selling bitcoin on Deep Web Marketplace [United States]

Question: Through the Tor router there is marketplace called Alphabay where people buy and sell whatever they need. However, i have a few friends who go on there to sell bitcoins at a ridiculously high return value. However, the man they sell them to is presumably using stolen Paypal accounts in order to pay for the bitcoin in a possible money laundering scheme. They both made money before Paypal limited their accounts, so it is at least shady enough that Paypal is trying to stop it. Will they get in legal trouble for selling to this guy?

Answer:
 > Will they get in legal trouble for selling to this guy?

They very well could, yes. Several people have gone to prison for selling bitcoin to people they knew were breaking the law in one way or another.


Title: Registering to vote made me a legal resident via DMV?

Question:
Hello all, first post here so please forgive any formatting issues.

I'm trying to find out if I was screwed over by DMV while reregistering my vehicles. I am active duty military on orders to Nevada (with a state of residency of California, well at least it used to be?). Nevada has a law that allows non-resident military members who are in orders to register their vehicles in Nevada tax free. I had done it last year (2016) with no issues. Early this year I applied for and got a Nevada driver's license. This is where I suppose I screwed up. They asked if I wanted to register to vote in Nevada and I said yes.

Went back a few months later to reregister my cars and they told me I was no longer eligible to claim the military tax exemption because registering to vote made me a legal resident of Nevada. I showed them my LES (pay stub) showing I still payed taxes to California, but they would not budge. Are they correct? Did registering to vote make me a legal resident?

I have many coworkers who have Nevada licenses but still get the exemption (but they aren't registered to vote anywhere). I know I can unregistered to vote; will that return my residency to California? I pay less taxes to CA over a year than paying vehicle registration taxes in NV.

Sorry for the wall of text. I'll answer any questions you have to help out.

Answer:
 > Are they correct? Did registering to vote make me a legal resident?

In every place I've ever lived, changing your DL alone would make you a resident.  Registering to vote, doubly so.

Most military members who maintain residency in other states keep their DLs, vehicle registration and voter registration *in* that state.  Answer #2: Agree with patman. Once you register to vote you are saying "this is my residence." Negating all other residences. You can't be a resident of California and vote in Nevada, that's voter fraud. (You'd vote via California absentee ballot.) So the state assumes you are not committing fraud (because of course you're not) and you are now a resident of Nevada, subject to its laws and taxes (or lack thereof).Answer #3: Former Naval Officer here. Once you moved your voter registration and DL, you became a Nevada resident. You screwed up on this one.


Title: My artwork is being printed on shirts, and an entity is profiting off of it without my consent.

Question:
Not sure how relevant this is, because this happened in the digital world, but: I created the art (digitally) whilst living in California, but I am currently living in New York.

I made some art a couple years back, and it has gained a lot of popularity on the internet, I found out that it is being used by someone else for merchandise profits, and no one informed me. I have all of my original files to prove that it's mine, including the photoshop files that show detailed progression of how I made the artwork (every stroke of the pen, color filling, assets), all of the original asset files. I was wondering if I could pursue this legally, and if I could, what could I do? I was also wondering if there was any possible way I could remain anonymous to the other party, or at least publicly, because I do not want the drama that comes with the publicity of something like this, as it would cause too much anxiety.

Answer: Yes, you can pursue a case against the other party, if you own the rights to the artwork.  If you have court action you cannot do it anonymously.  Contact an intellectual property attorney in your area.Answer #2: If they are doing it through a website, you can DMCA the website to take down pictures of the items. Beyond that you need to hire a lawyer and sue them.


Title: Elderly neighbors who own the property we rent, will not leave us alone. [NM]

Question:
I called a few local lawyers today and hope to get a callback Monday, but it looks like we're in for a showdown this weekend so I was hoping to get some advice here.

&#x200B;

Long story short, we just moved to the area a few months ago and we signed a lease with a property management company and the owners of a small house that we rent. The owners live next door and had us over for dinner, seemed nice, we were happy to have such a positive relationship with them. This has turned into a nightmare in a hurry. They called us at all hours and would become very angry if we didn't respond quickly. They expected us to come over at all hours of the day to help them with things, even after we explained that we have full time jobs, expect us to be their medical transport, etc. They don't have any friends or family, so we became enmeshed in their lives very quickly. But they would treat us very poorly and abuse our time and we started to establish boundaries after they did a lot of concerning things. Among them, in no particular order:

&#x200B;

\- They told us all of the smoke detectors were new, tested and functional. They were too high for us to reach but we hired a handyman who took them down for us and demonstrated that every single one was dead, guy suggested they probably hadn't worked since the 80s. The screw plates didn't even match anything that's sold at Lowe's.

&#x200B;

\- They kept coming in to the house without notice or prior consent. They used to have family living here, so we were understanding at first, but after making it very clear that this wasn't okay (sometimes we were sleeping or changing, etc) we started to route everything through the property manager. He could not get them to listen to the state or local laws, and they were upset that he told them "no", so they fired him (even though he is on our contract?) and have since just tried to push through with the unauthorized visits and other harassment without using proper notice.

&#x200B;

\- I caught them looking in our windows at night a few times. We've had someone creeping around the house at night and on the roof, tapping on windows etc. They refuse to give us warning when someone is going to be on the roof, nor answer their phone when there is someone there, so it's hard to tell when it's maintenance or not. I now have a policy of calling LE any time someone is up there at night. We put up cameras per LE advice. They were upset at this and tried to demand the cameras be taken down, insisting that we're "watching them" even though they only cover my bedroom and back windows. We have caught them on camera several times going in and out of the private courtyard and garage and rearranging things.

&#x200B;

\- They insist that we not change the locks at all, even though they acknowledge that an old employee who stole from the house previously (according to them) still has a copy. They also insist we not use any bar locks. We do though, and we set up an alarm system that they don't know the code to anyway, and that has cut down on the actual intrusions in to the house, though not the rest of the property.

&#x200B;

\- They claim the garage is ours to use but it's full of their stuff, including a lot of expensive stuff. We put a motion sensor on the door recently so that we can prove that we never go in there (since they make a lot of wild accusations), but they left an opener for us in our mailbox recently and they're now trying to insist that we park behind the house and only enter and exit through the garage. This is the opposite of what was agreed when we moved in.

&#x200B;

\- They sent us a letter from a lawyer who clearly hasn't read the rental contract claiming we're violating it (example: pets section says they allow all pets, now they're trying to say pets we told them about before we signed are not allowed). We're not, though they are in a few ways. It's tempting to reply citing line and law, or just actually get our lawyer to pursue them for all of the harrassment and out of pocket costs for maintenance we've incurred. They staple notes to our front gate with commands. They leave long rambling messages on both of our phones.

&#x200B;

\- This morning they called code enforcement to try to force us to move our cars from the drives we were instructed to park in when we moved in. They have never spoken a word about this to us, but apparently they told the neighbor that we're blocking their access to above-mentioned garage. But the car blocking the drive is gone 12 hours/day and we've never been asked to move it or we simply would to make things easier. It's just exhausting stuff like this all the time.

&#x200B;

I could go on and on. It's unfortunate but their childish tactics put a lot of stress on me due to some traumatic stuff in my upbringing. We've tried talking with them about it or sending messages. As with the property manager, the last time we called to try to arrange a viewing time that wasn't in the middle of our night (we're night shifted but happy to get up in the mornings or evenings or on weekends) the owner just yelled expletives at us until we finally hung up.

I've reread the laws and I know we're in the right, but that doesn't stop the harassment or the illness I feel at having to deal with it. I just had major unexpected surgery and the stress is complicating my recovery. What can I do about this to make myself feel better?

&#x200B;

If you made it this far, sincere thanks for your time.

Answer:
 Call the police when they break into your house every time.

Beyond that? Listen to your lawyers. This is a string of illegal conduct. Document everything you can.
Answer #2: Check your local housing laws and if you can, change all of the locks. Also check your tenancy agreement to see if it has anything relating to this.

Are you wanting to stay here or move out?

>As with the property manager, the last time we called to try to arrange a viewing time that wasn't in the middle of our night

Is this allowing potential tenants to view your current home? Answer #3: Have they ever done anything to you when they enter at night? Or stole something? Regardless, a Restraining Order and Moving out might be the best move for you Answer #4: You are of course 100% legally in the right. But, as I've been through almost exactly the same situation, I believe the only solution will be to move.

After a few landlords much like yours, I decided to only rent through 100% management companies. Typically at least they actually know the laws, and make some effort or pretense at following them.


Title: Is my aunt trying to steal my inheritance? NY

Question: I created my first account for this. I live in Florida, and my uncle passed away last week. He lived in New York near the rest of my family. In his will he left everything to me (apparently). I wouldn't know because I haven't been able to see the will yet. Supposedly I get his condo and everything in it, including a very valuable stamp collection. 2 days after he died, my aunt decided to switch my uncles lawyer to one of her choosing and wants me to sign power of attorney over to her. In the meantime, shes started cleaning stuff out of the condo and has changed the locks. I dont know what's in there and she could be taking things as we speak. She already wants the condo cleaned out so it can be sold and shes getting the stamps appraised. If its lalli left to me, why is she doing any of this? Shes executor of the will, but I'm unsure of what that entails. I should add that she has a history of stealing from family, like taking $4000 from my grandmother with dementia who lives in a nursing home to remodel her bathroom. Should I seek my own legal counsel, or wait for the will to go to probate? How would I contact my uncles lawyer who would be able to let me see the will? I've never been in a situation like this before and I'm at a loss. Being in different states also makes this difficult.

Answer:
 You should absolutely seek your own attorney. However, as the executor, she is likely required to get assets appraised, etc. The debts of your uncles estate will have to be paid from the assets before you get anything. Also, depending on how the real estate was titled, it is possible it isn't even part of the estate. And another layer, if by aunt and uncle, you mean they were married (as opposed to brother and sister), it is very difficult to actually disinherit a spouse. In NY, your aunt would be entitled to a third of the estate even if your uncle left her out.

Sign NOTHING until you seek advice from your own probate attorney. You need to do this immediately. Monday morning, put your finger in the phone and start calling attorneys, preferably in the county where your uncle resided.


Title: Police officer refuses to make a report for the theft of my iPad (Chicago)

Question:
This question is for the police officers who frequent this forum.

I had too many bags to carry up to my apartment when I came back home after the holidays, so I left half in the building entryway (behind a locked door, but accessible to my neighbors) while I carried the others upstairs. When I came back down for the rest of the bags, my iPad was missing.

I called 311 to file a police report. The officer refused to take a report because I shouldn't have left the iPad in the entryway. I know that was dumb of me, but isn't theft still theft?

It is a work-issued iPad and I need to document the theft. I also would like the report for a renter's insurance claim (wouldn't normally be worth it, but I've already met the deductible). What should I do?

Answer: Depends on the city. For example, I would take that report since I work in a medium size suburb.  A large city might require you fill out an online report.


Title: Can a domestic battery case be dropped when the victim does not want to cooperate?

Question:
Illinois.
Defendant has no prior criminal history.

Domestic battery case, defendant got into a heated argument with his sister.   Defendant slammed the victim to the ground and began choking her.

Victim went to her friends house who advised her to take pictures and call the police.

Victim calls the police, files police report, and pictures are taken indicating marks on her neck.

Victim refused medical treatment.

Over course of the case the victim eliminated the order of protection, and has put out the flames of the argument with her brother.   Victim does not want brother to face criminal charges and admits in being partially responsible for provoking the argument.

Defendent(brother) is still facing the criminal case of domestic battery.

What can be done to likely avoid a conviction?

Answer: Can it be dropped? Sure, it *can*. Will it? Maybe, maybe not. With that much evidence, I'd say it's not very likely.Answer #2: Is avoiding a conviction really in the victim's best interests? [Strangulation is](http://m.stltoday.com/news/local/crime-and-courts/choking-crimes-should-be-taken-as-sign-of-worse-to/article_be2157c3-b574-5a02-a86b-2e459cd5d80d.html?mobile_touch=true) [the best predictor of future homicide of victims of domestic violence](http://mobile.recorder.com/home/13570842-108/strangulation-is-most-lethal-form-of-domestic-violence).