Title: Girlfriends parents threw away my birth cirtificate, Social security card and tons of our personal belongings randomly, what can we do?

Question:
Okay so a little bit of back story, me and my girlfriend moved in with her parents a few months ago, they had promised to help pay for college with some money the family had set aside for her. We had agreed upon paying them rent for basically our "half of the house" (the back half nobody went into) after moving everything from our old apartment across the state of texas, they randomly kicked us out at midnight on a Saturday.  They could never give the same answer to why it happened but it got violent. We decided to essentially cut most contact out with them because of the circumstances. My girlfriend was not allowed to go back into her parents house to even pack as per their request. I followed their guidelines and went by myself to pick up any personal belongings as we are now sleeping on an air mattress of somebody's apartment because we know nobody in the town we live in. After going back a few times and filling up our car, they told me they wouldn't touch our stuff and we could leave it there until we got a new place of our own.
Here's where it gets bad

Me, my girlfriend and her father all work at the same company, and a couple of days ago he was fired for not doing his job and taking hour and forty-five minute lunch breaks and going home all on the clock. Last night he made a big post on facebook talking about how he threw away all of our personal belongings and clothes that were still at the house, opened my girlfriends birthday cards and took the money for them to use without her consent and threatened that we and the people we work with will have some "special presents coming" in the next few days. I need to know what I am able to legally do since it was our things and we weren't given any notice or warning. Were going to file restraining orders on both of her parents today but I just want to know if there was anything else we should or could do about this situation.

Edit/update: I haven't slept in about 28 hours so I'm sorry if this is layed out horribly, but, we drove to 3 police stations for us to finally talk to somebody who could file a report and basically got told they can't really do much off of a Facebook post. We could meet an officer at the house and file destruction of property, but I don't feel it's worth it. This was the least of my worries though actually, we can get new household things and my mom is picking up my new birth cirtificate in a couple of days. That process is a pain! Next is ss office to get a new social card, and we have reported the mail opening and theft to the postal service. My main focus is my girlfriends safety, we have notified the police of the threats and our boss knows and is taking action on it.  This weekend we will be talking to my family attourney and filing the restraining orders. I really appreciate everybody for all of your gracious, helpful and encouraging posts. It's helped me keep my head up today.

Update 2: Sorry I haven't really been able to respond recently, had to get some sleep before it was back to work. Both me and my girlfriend talked to our boss today and he really wants us to file a police report and meet them at the house. We talked amongst each other and I believe that we are going to go ahead and do it. We also have reason to believe he will be attempting to sue the company and get people who he believes got him fired, fired themselves. Our hr department was made aware as was the head of our location. One thing that has come up into my head over the past couple of hours has been somewhat bothering me. As it's obvious these people cannot be trusted I feel like they are at the point of doing anything to ruin our lives, I feel they would go as far as planting illegal/incriminating evidence in our old room. They have a history of drug abuse and I could see them trying to pull a fast one like that. If something of the sort does happen who would be held liable for that? Would it be them because we haven't lived there or gone back in about a month? I can't really see us being held accountable for anything there really, but I just wanted to make sure before we go. Also I just wanted to sincerely thank everybody on behalf of me and my girlfriend. All of the advice and words of encouragement did more than most can understand.

Answer:
 Did she get the cards in the mail? If they are addressed to her then thats a felonyAnswer #2: > We could meet an officer at the house and file destruction of property, but I don't feel it's worth it.

It's worth it.


Title: Given choice between ambulance and jail when refusing medical treatment by EMS. Legal?

Question:
The other night my husband fainted while at the gym. He works long hours, but has recently committed to losing weight, so he's been trying to work out despite being crazy tired. He obviously overexerted himself, and was also dehydrated, which caused the incident. Someone obviously called 911 after he passed out. By the time EMS arrived he had already woken, but was slightly confused. He generally became more aware, and then attempted to get up, in response the EMS people began holding him down. He was struggling a bit, because he said he was refusing medical treatment, and in return EMS called the cops. I was basically crying because they pushed me out of the way when I kept asking them to stop holding him down, but they would not.

I understand that medical professionals need to know whether someone has taken any medications or drugs, but the fact that they kept asking me, over and over and over whether he was on drugs, and ultimately tackled him like a criminal makes me think that they had pretty much decided that he was a scumbag druggie that lies about such things to his wife.

The EMS people that tackled him let up with the police officer arrived, and my husband agreed that he would sit on the stretcher. He reiterated that he did not want to be taken to the hospital, that we did not have the money to pay for it. The EMS jokingly said that "name" would pay for it (they said a name, I don't recall what the name they said was). The police officer told him he had 2 choices - either he goes to the hospital, or he would be cuffed and taken to jail. Is that even legal?

He was forced into going to the hospital in the ambulance, and upon arrival refused medical treatment and we were allowed to leave after signing a paper to that effect. Should he have been presented with this option by the EMS? Is there anything we can do in regards to not being presented with this option? We're basically going to be sent an $800+ bill for the ambulance ride. Are there any legal methods to contest this?

State: Pennsylvania

Answer:
 As for the jail. . .
Is it fair?  Probably not. Is it legal? Almost certainly.  The officer needs probable cause to make an arrest.  It doesn't matter if he was not on drugs as long as he appears to be and the officer reasonably believed he was.

As the cop would present to court "Responding to reports that a man collapsed and had seizures at the gym, I encountered a man who was disoriented and combative.  He did not appear to understand the situation and was refusing medical help.  Based on my training and experience these symptoms are common for people under the influence of an amphetamine.  I arrested him based on (whatever drug use statute"

This doesn't mean he would be charged, it only means he could be arrested.


Title: Is it illegal to login to someone's Facebook without permission and harass another user?

Question:
My father hijacked my 12 yrold sister's Facebook and used it to harass my mother through comments on her pictures.

[NM]

Answer: A 12 year old is not permitted to have an account on the Book of Faces. Their TOS requires age 13 because of federal data collection laws.


Title: (U.S. AL) Mechanic technician messed up. The dealership is trying to screw us over.

Question:
Recently, my cars' check engine light had come on. I took it to Auto Zone and had a code reading done. The code came back for a faulty thermostat. I took it to Quicklane (Auto repair shop) the day before yesterday and told the staff what's up. They performed a diagnostic and stated that a pipe connecting to the radiator is messed up, not the thermostat. I said ok. They installed a brand new pipe and the cost of everything amounted to $190. I paid it and walked out. Yesterday, the light came on again and I was confused. I called again and they stated to bring it in and that they would look at it free of charge. They examined it, stated they fucked up and it was actually the thermostat. I was pretty mad at this point because I felt that they should have detected this already. They fixed it and I paid $170 for everything. I'm now almost $400 out because of this inept place and at the end of my rope. I bring it home fine. It starts smoking this morning and there's coolant all over the road. I called for the third day in a row and tell him what's going on. He says to bring it and proceeds to tell me that the external unit for the radiator is now cracked and it would cost $350 for everything. Im fucking blown away with how insane this is. I said how did you not detect this before? He stated that after they installed the thermostat the heat must have cracked the external unit because its made of plastic and they're ordering a metal part. I said ok, so the damage was done by one of your employees performing maintenance because they didn't have the competence to foresee this happening and because the damage was done by them directly...ergo, it seems to be the fault of this shop and not my fault. He said he wouldn't charge for labor to help us out and brought it down to $120. I said screw that, you should install it for free. He says no and alludes to the fact that its a Chevrolet and I somehow should have foreseen this coming. Management is being extremely unhelpful and is stating that its not the technicians fault...its mine. What do I do? I just don't have the money.
Topic:
Other Civil Matters

Answer:
 IANAL but I am an ASE certified mechanic. Age of the vehicle is important here, but these could all be related repairs. However what I will say is this: the code readers at Autozone/Advance/Oriellys/NAPA etc give a specific code number. This number / code is a point in the *general direction* of what ever issue your car is having. It is not a guarantee, and should always always always be diagnosed by an ASE certified mechanic. Not every mechanic at every shop is certified (especially the smaller side of the road places like Jiffy Lube), and there are technicians that are better than others.

Also the cooling system is a pressurized system, it holds anywhere from 16-25psi (maybe more) at its peak. If the system was faulty, and was then fixed, the next weakest link tends to fail soon after. An ASE certified mechanic would possibly have suggested the replacement of multiple parts while they were fixing the original complaint.


Title: Caught with weed in an illegal search

Question:
This happened about 10 hours ago. I'm living at university in the residence hall. On the housing contract that I signed, it explicitly says that students will be notified of fire inspections and other searches *in advance*.

I believe that someone casually said that I smoke, and the RA overheard, and she told. My room was then searched, and they found 5 oz. I bought this 5 oz over winter break, and I only bought that much because it's suppose to last me this entire semester, but it it going to be considered intent to distribute? This is New York, and I go to private school.

Also, the search is illegal afaik since on the contract, it said that I must be notified in advance, and I clearly was not.

Answer:
 Not a criminal lawyer but I am psychic. I predict posts telling you to get the best criminal lawyer you possibly can, that your hope that this was an illegal search is almost certain be false, that you face serious legal jeopardy and will lose any financial aid for at least a year or more.

5oz of weed in your dorm. I'm surprised they couldn't smell it from the next floor of the building. Have fun in community college.


Title: Landlord is charging me $11,000+ for "damage" to apartment? (NJ)

Question:
My husband and I lived in an attic apartment that the landlord had renovated while his home is the building below for about five years. On October 15th, we moved into a new home so we did not renew the lease (and no, we did not break it either). On the 14th, we did a walkthrough with the landlord and his wife. We alerted them to some issues that had recently sprung up such as a leaky sink and the toilet cover being loose. They made a note of that, and we expected to have some of that come out of our security deposit which was $1,575.

We were hoping to receive word of what remained of our deposit a week later so we contacted his phone and then his email. Nothing. Time went by, and while we continued to try contacting him and got worried. His wife answered us on 11/12, and told us that she was going to send us an in-voice for what we owed. I thought she meant what was taken from the deposit.

So, on 11/23 (the day before Thanksgiving at that...), we got a letter plus the in-voice from the landlord. According to him, we had completely ruined the apartment, and there was more damage to it than we had told him about. He claims the oven was busted, the sink was clogged, the bath tub was stained, the hardwood floor was damaged, the walls would need to be re-painted, etc. He had to keep the entire deposit **and** charged us an additional $11,529.58 for irreparable damage. We must pay this amount before 1/1/2017 or he will sue us.

I am appalled. We did not damage the apartment the way he claims. Of course, I have no proof of this. We didn't bother to take pictures or anything before we left because the landlord seemed to have no issues with the apartment. I called a lawyer my family has used but he says this is a "civil matter" and can't assist us.

What do I do next? I've tried researching this online to no avail. I really need advice. We can't afford to pay $11,000 before January nor do I think we should have to.

Answer: In New Jersey, the landlord is required by law to return your deposit or provide an itemized receipt of expenses within thirty days. Since they did not provide either within the appropriate time frame, I would dispute it on those grounds.


Title: Boyfriend stole my savings and cops say it's not a crime

Question:
I don't really know what to do. I feel like an idiot, I wasn't checking my bank statements during almost a year of dealing bad depression and medications weren't helping (diagnosed bipolar). Wasn't spending our making money with mental state and those facts it wasn't a priority.I haven't been close to stable for even more than one or two months and just found out about this last Friday night. He had been stealing the money from at least January, we broke up in March.

I feel like I'm not going to get my money back. I just hate all this. I'm such a fool. Especially because i gave him my pin once when he convinced me to let him borrow my card, and he had me deposit his paychecks because "he wouldn't deal with banks"and now I'm realizing that's probably because he's fraudulent things before.

Cops just said that because I let him use the card once it's not theft. I'm in Canada if that matters. I'm calling the bank but at this point is my only option to sue him, can I even do that?

Answer:
 You can certainly sue him. The cops likely don't want to get in the middle because it *sounds like* you did give him access to your account(s) and know it would be very difficult to criminally prove he stole the money. But suing him would be an appropriate course of action if he withdrew money from the account(s) without your permission.Answer #2: If you give someone access to your accounts, it's not a police matter if they empty it out. He was depositing checks into it and taking money out at ATMs regularly so that is a *de facto* joint account.

You have to sue.


Title: Georgia laws for selling home baked goods

Question: Can anyone tell me how to go about finding out what my states requirements are for selling home baked goods? My husband had really been encouraging me to start selling the things I bake. However I'm unsure of where to start in regards to the legality of it. I live in Georgia

Answer:
 http://agr.georgia.gov/cottage-foods.aspx

http://agr.georgia.gov/data/sites/1/media/ag_consumerprotection/cottage_food/files/cottagefoodregulations.pdf


Title: Apartment lease ended last month, landlord first said 10% increase, then raised it to 25% mid month... [FL]

Question:
My roommates and I have finished out our lease and we are now on a month to month basis. The landlord emailed us and said that the rent was going to go up 10% but notified us yesterday that it is now 25% per the lease agreement. We read through the lease and the only thing that it state is: If the required notice (to vacate) is not given by landord or tenant, the tenancy shall become month-to-month tenancy, which may be terminated by tenant or landlord giving written notice not less than 15 days prior to the end of some subsequent monthly payment period. All other conditions of the lease shall remain in effect."

So how in the hell do they get that they can raise our rates like this?
Topic:
Landlord Tenant Housing

Answer:
 When you're on a month-to-month tenancy, they can raise the rent whenever they want. If they gave you less than 15 days notice before the next rent was due, then you should be able to pay the +10% rate for the next rent and then the +25% in subsequent months.

You also have the option of rejecting the +25% and moving out by the end of the 10% month. If you choose to do that, make sure to notify them by the end of this month.


Title: Landlord going back on his word after giving security deposit

Question:
The following is roughly what is happening:

1) You visit a rental unit, ask your questions, and decide to move forward

2) Give security deposit (2500$+ in NYC) and perform the application

3) Get accepted

4) Receive the lease and see that it contains extremely specific and unreasonable rules that you could not have ever though to ask

What do you do?

In my case, the landlord is now saying that the parking spot (which was said to be free when I asked) can only be used by a car which is *registered to my name*. Not a leased car. Not a company car. Not my parent's car. Not my girlfriend's. Not my visitors'.

I don't want to lose my security deposit, and I'm now afraid / don't want to sign with this landlord because of the petty rules in their lease which were never mentioned, hinted at, or even implied when I asked a related question about parking (and others) ... but of course I did not think to ask who could use the parking. Can they really do this?

Answer:
 Are you sure this is a security deposit and not a holding deposit?

IANAL but from my experience it seems unusual to pay a security deposit prior to signing the lease.


Title: Abortion Extortion?

Question:
Thanks in advance for taking your time to read this. I'm in Tennessee.

My ex husband and I currently relocated from one city to another, both within TN. We made the move together because we share joint custody of our two children. We made the move because he was offered a promotion. Although I didn't really want to move, he offered me over ten thousand dollars in order to do so. I didn't want to make a major move like this on a handshake so he drew up a contract and both signed it before a notary, I thought I was being smart. We made the move and wound up spending a lot of time together. Long story short, we hooked up a couple of times and conceived a child. When I told him he was furious and immediately began threatening me. Up to this point he'd only given me four of the ten-plus thousand he owes. He told me that he'll never give me another dime unless I terminate the pregnancy. I told him I'd gladly take him to court for the money and he just laughed, telling me that they'll garnish his wages and I'll be lucky to receive the settlement in full before I hit menopause (I'm 36).
Some thing told me to try to get all of this in writing so I sent this text and go (hopefully) the reply I need:
Me: So just to be clear: if I don't have an abortion you will not willingly pay to break my lease as you said you would before a notary? I understand if you don't want to verify that on the record because it's deplorable, but if I'm understanding you correctly that's the deal..just want to make sure I have all of the facts before moving forward
Him: If you do not term, I will not be voluntarily paying anything.

He's told me several times that he intends to ruin me financially. Five of that ten thousand was to break my lease in order to move to this new city. I've been paying them a few hundred at a time just to keep them from sending me to collections. He's told me that if this goes to collections I'll never qualify for an apartment again, I'll end up on someone's couch, and he'll go to family court and file for full custody because I cannot provide a fit environment. He says, 'do the right thing and so will I', ironically.
 So for this reason and many others I am working quietly with a family lawyer in order to win full custody of my children, the world is crazy enough without this but mucking around in our lives. My question is, doesn't this qualify as extortion, threatening somebody with financial ruin unless they kill their child? The more I think about this the angrier I become, and I don't want him to get away with this.
I'm on my mobile and cannot proofread so please forgive any poor grammar or typos. Thank you.

Answer: As a practical matter, given the situation and what's going on, why do you want to have a baby with this person and be further tied to him for the rest of your life?


Title: I emigrated for a job. Got the job confirmation, contract and now I'm abroad without a job.

Question:
I had a job offer here where I live 2 weeks ago and e-mailed the recruiters that I was planning to take it and I would be off the market.

But the recruiter of the other company said that the company was really interested in me and they matched the offer and they send out the contract and confirmed everything in writing multiple times and they gave me my start start date. I asked confirmation about 10 times and asked if I could hand in my rental notice (rent costs $2500 here).

I've arranged the emigration, cancelled my rent and took a flight for my first day at the company.

Once I arrived at the office. It turned out that that part of the company thought I was coming in for a 2nd face-2-face interview. I was in a foreign country and had a phone-call interview from their office with a guy working from home. They apologized for the miscommunication, but I even have the contract and multiple times in writing that it's all confirmed, 6 months contract and at what rate.

So I could've been working for a well-paying job without emigrating, but instead I emigrated and now no-income, no nothing.

I emigrated from the UK to the Netherlands.

Answer:
 Depsite multiple prompts, you have not provided a location (neither your home country or your new country) so there's no way anyone can help you right now.

Reading comprehension doesn't seem like your strong suit, so you should probably have your paperwork reviewed by a local attorney.Answer #2: Try /r/legaladviceuk

Shitty situation, I hope it works out alright for you.


Title: [Mississippi] Pulled over and given a ticket for 'not wearing my seatbelt', when I was wearing my seatbelt.

Question:
Officer said I drove past him and was not wearing my seatbelt and said I looked like I was scrambling to put it on once he pulled behind me and put his lights on. My seatbelt was on the whole time and was easily visible against the white sweater I was wearing. I was polite the entire time and let him know that if I was in the wrong, I would be fine with admitting it, but I was not in the wrong here, I was wearing it the entire time.

After he gave me the ticket, I politely asked if his car had a dash camera and he said it did not. I responded with, "Well, so it's pretty much my word against yours here then, right?" and he said, "Yep, pretty much".

Looking at the ticket, he also filled out multiple parts incorrectly. For 'year, make, model', he put '17, Honda, '06.

Also, he did not check any of the boxes on the ticket for what the violation I had committed was.

My court date is on March 28th, do you guys believe there is anything I can do against this, or is it pretty much just my word against his?

Thanks in advance.

Answer:
 > Looking at the ticket, he also filled out multiple parts incorrectly. For 'year, make, model', he put '17, Honda, '06.

Irrelevant to the matter at hand.

You can go to court and tell your side of the story.  The officer will tell his side of the story.  The judge will make a decision.


Title: Got kicked out of a bar sober and they wouldn't let me back in to get my coat.

Question:
Last night I was at a bar, essentially sober (I had 3 beers over a three hour period). I jokingly took my sisters drink while she was playing pool to see how she would react and I got kicked out. When I asked the bouncer to go back in to get my coat, they said I couldn't, and that my coat wasn't their responsibility. I went back to get it the next day and it was gone. Do I have a case? The coat was $150

Location: Nova Scotia, Canada

Answer: First of all, bars don't make money when they kick you out, so this is generally a last resort. I'm going to assume the bouncer confronted you about your joke and you acted like enough of a douchebag to piss him off, which tends to happen when people believe themselves to be "essentially sober". Secondly, why didn't your sister or a friend grab the coat for you?Answer #2: And why, pray tell, did your sister not get your coat for you? Answer #3: There has to be more to this story.


Title: [Virginia, USA] Haven't been paid any overtime pay for almost 8 years

Question: I work for a small, local business. The owner handles all the administrative aspects as well as all the finances and accounting. None of the employees get paid time and a half for any hours worked past 40 in a week, no insurance, and no Paid Time Off. I honestly never worried about it much since I was able to afford my lifestyle and made ends meet fairly well, though not always perfectly. I am now older and realize that I am probably being taken advantage of. Is there any recourse for me to recoup all the pay and a half that I was not paid? Did I wait too long? Can anyone tell me how to go about dealing with this with any state authority? I have worked approximately 6 hours overtime every week for almost 8 years. Any advice or explanation on how this kind of thing is handled in Virginia would be much appreciated. Feel free to ask me for any other crucial info that I have not provided.

Answer: It looks like in Virginia you cannot recoup wages after 3 years. So you'd be able to get your last 3 years of OT paid.


Title: [USA, Florida] I'm a disabled adult living with an extremely abusive, drug addict mother. I don't know where to turn. Please help.

Question:
I'm a 30 year old male, and as my title says, I'm disabled and living with my mother, who is a drug addict and severely abusive towards me. I have a laundry list of disabilities, including Asperger's Syndrome, Bipolar, Depression, Anxiety and Social Anxiety on the mental side of things, and Fibromyalgia, GERD, Irritable Bowel Syndrome and a number of undiagnosed issues that nobody can seem to figure out the cause of.

Because of this, I don't really function that well in society. I have extreme difficulty in social situations and my anxiety can be so overwhelming in so many different kinds of situations that it feels like I'm about to die. So as if I didn't have my own problems, I'm living with someone who is insane, violent, dangerous and controlling and seems intent on making my life an absolute hell.

I have no job, and my psychiatrist has said that he doesn't really feel I could hold a job right now, given all of my issues and hang-ups, and we're actually in the middle of trying to fight against Social Security to retain my disability check that they're trying to take away. It's the only money keeping me alive right now, but unfortunately, I have *no access to it*. I'll get to that in a moment.

As I've said, my mother is a drug addict. This is kind of the core of all of the other problems I'm about to describe. Over the years, she's done all sorts of different drugs at different points in time - everything from marijuana, to cocaine, to crack. But her favorites have always been *pills*. She loves her pills, lemme tell ya. For years she has taken Percocet (which they only just took away from her recently, and she still raises a scene every time she goes to the doctor and they refuse to prescribe it), Soma, Xanax and Ambien. Plus a few other pills that are allegedly actually for her health, like an antidepressant and blood pressure pill.

The thing is, the same psychiatrist who is allegedly fighting to help me keep my disability check? He's the same guy who is giving her the pills every month, even though I've blatantly told him *everything* that goes on. I've told him that she's a drug addict, that she abuses the pills to get high, and that she is abusive towards me. Yet he pretty much just tells me "Well we can't just cut her right off of them, but I'm trying to bring them down" every time I bring it up. Of course, even if he *did* cut her off, she'd probably just buy them on the street (she has before).  As far as I know, right now the only drugs she's on are her pills and weed, but who knows with her.

However, given that I am not a well functioning person, I *depend on her* in order to survive. I can't drive (I'm terrified to, and never got a license), I can't talk to people in public without practically having a panic attack so doing something even a simple as shopping is extremely difficult for me, and I have *no life skills whatsoever*. Part of this, I suppose, is my general lack of understanding of a lot of things most people would consider to be simple. But another part of it is the simple fact that she refuses to teach me how to do anything, nobody else is around to teach me and because of my severe anxiety, trying to do things on my own without someone showing me firsthand is enough to cause a panic attack. She wants me to be dependent on her, to control me. And she knows that I *do* depend on her, so she can practically get away with anything, knowing that at the end of the day, I'll come crying, asking for a ride to the grocery store.

But that's just part of the problem. She isn't reliable. She has over the course of my life deliberately helped stunt my growth of life skills, making me dependent on her, but yet she *isn't dependable", because of her drug use. In fact, *right now*, we were *supposed* to be going to the grocery store, but she's too wasted to drive, so I can't go. It's not that I have nothing to eat right now, but there are certain things I needed to buy, and now I can't, because I have no means to get there and no money. Which brings me to my next point...

Back when this whole Disability thing started, when I was a teenager, she was of course considered my payee since I was a minor. However, this was never changed when I became an adult. Nobody told me *how* to change it. In fact, she would make up excuses, saying that she didn't *trust* me to have money, because I would "spend it irresponsibly", which is a load of bullshit because I'm the only one around here that actually cares about our finances. She just blows money on whatever she feels like (and yes, sometimes drugs), whenever she feels like and then we end up having to beg my uncle for money by the end of the month (I'll get to him later).

So, case in point, I have no access to a single penny of my Disability check. I get around $750 (I'm not even sure of the exact amount because *she won't tell me*) at the start of each month, and I have absolutely no say in where any of it is spent. She also gets disability (the same amount, I believe), and we're on Section 8 housing, so part of the money goes towards the rent, bills and food - but we often end up without food money at the end of the month (even though we both get food stamps too) because she just blows it on whatever she damn well feels like. Hell, when we go to the grocery, she'll even make a big scene almost every damn time we get to the cashier where she stands awkwardly in front of the card machine as she puts her pin and jokes to the cashier about "I'm not letting HIM get any of my money!", which is especially bad as it's extremely embarrassing and she *knows* I have social anxiety and freak out about shit like this. She does it intentionally, just to embarrass me and make me feel bad.

But this is all just the tip of the iceberg. I haven't even gotten to the worst of it yet. This has all just been the controlling aspects. I haven't even gotten to the outright abuse yet.

She is physically, verbally and emotionally abusive. She gets violent with me, hitting me, throwing things at me, threatening to set me on fire (this is specific as she knows I'm terrified of being burned - I won't even cook a lot of things that might have oil popping and the like, for example), threatening to call the police on me for *defending myself*, threatening to destroy my property (and sometimes even doing so, though this is rare), threatening to have my internet shut off, threatening to take food back to the store, and other such things. Lots of physical violence, but also a lot of verbal and psychological torment, specifically about things she knows I will react to.

And react to it I do. I know that I'm not entirely mentally stable. But what am I supposed to do? Let her just beat me up? Let her throw dangerous objects at me? Let her break the only things that keep me going day after day? But I know I can't hit her, because then she'll use that against me (and she has - I'll get to that in a moment as well), even if all I'm doing is defending myself against her violence. Protecting my own life. But I do a lot of screaming at her. And a lot of indirect means of fighting back, walking towards her to push her back when she is physically violent, for example.

And like I said, she knows what to say to make me filled with anger and fear and panic. She deliberately pokes at me, saying the same shit every time, and even though I *know* she's doing it specifically to get a rise out of me, I can't control myself. I can't stop from freaking out about it. I'm so fucking traumatized from years and years of this shit, that even though I should know better, every time I hear her so much as slur her words (from being high), it sends me into full-on fight-or-flight panic attack mode. And you can imagine how bad it gets when she's actually being directly abusive...

But as I said, I know I can't really do anything about it. Why? Because nobody believes me. She is a fucking expert manipulator, who will cry crocodile tears to every single person we know and tell them how much of a terrible, dangerous son I am. Even though *she* is the abusive one, and I am the victim. She'll tell them of the time how I "broke her arm" (which I did, but that was because she was tripping balls on hallucinogenic drugs and I had to physically restrain her because she was flailing around like a maniac, claiming that someone was in the house trying to steal her pills...), or tell them about all the terrible mean names I call her, or how I tell her that I wish she'd just fucking OD already and stop making my life a living hell. And they believe her. Why? Fuck if I know. I guess she's just a really good liar.

But despite the fact that I deliberately try and walk away from these situations (which is extremely difficult because she doesn't know the meaning of the word letting up, and because she will attempt to - and has done so before, break down my bedroom door when I try and run away), there have been times when I completely lost control because I physically and mentally could not take the abuse any more, and I did get physically violent with her in retaliation. She's called the cops on me several times, and twice they Baker Acted me (forced me to a mental hospital). For the record, she's *also* been Baker Acted twice, and arrested once, but for things unrelated to her abuse of me. Thing was, in both instances of being thrown in the loony bin, they let me out after the observation period, saying that my depression and anxiety were bad... but not something worth keeping me locked up for.

But the thing was, I *told the police exactly what happened on both occasions*. The first time, it was because she was hallucinating on some drugs and being physically violent with me and I pushed her to the ground. When I told the cops this, in tears, they straight up *laughed at me*, and said, and I quote "There's no way a big strong man like you is being abused by this little old woman", and dragged me away. The second time, she threw a cup at me and I threw it back at her, and that prompted her to call the cops again. I told them outright that my mother was an abusive drug addict and I was in danger and I wanted her to be thrown in prison. They told me "come outside and we'll talk about it and try and sort this out", and then dragged me into the police car instead of actually listening to a single thing I said.

And despite the fact that I told hospital staff and police on both occasions that I was living with someone dangerous, abusive and psychotic who was hell bent on controlling and ruining my life, they refused to let me out of the hospital unless I accepted to be *released into the care of the exact same person I was telling them was abusing me.* I even begged my uncle to take me in instead, but he refused to.

Speaking of my uncle, he basically doesn't give a fuck. He makes decent money, and if not for him, we'd have been out on the street and starved to death long ago. You wouldn't believe how many times he's paid our bills or bought us a fridge full of food because mom blew all of our money on drugs. But emotionally, he just doesn't care. In fact, he encourages her. He says that if she wants to get high, she can get high. But he refuse to acknowledge that her getting high is what makes her into a violent psychopath, or how that's why he constantly has to shell out money for us. Of course, he will take every opportunity to put both of us down because he feels she's pretty much no-good (but yet he won't admonish her for doing drugs...) and he thinks I'm just a lazy asshole who refuses to do anything, never acknowledging that I have legitimate physical and mental health issues. He could easily find me somewhere else to live - he has money for sure, and could make sure I at least have a safety net below me until I get on my feet.... but he just refuses to, even though he already shells out hundreds of dollars a month for us...

So basically... I have nobody really on my side. I don't have any friends I can go stay with, and heck, as far as I know, if I leave this house as a resident, then I *lose my Section 8*, which would be the only way I could conceivably afford to live on my own. Like, it's tied to all residents of a house, so if we split up, we both lose it. And let's not forget that they're also trying to take my disability check away. We already appealed it twice, and they rejected it each time, but my psychiatrist (who again, is just enabling my mom's drug addiction at the same time) is at the very least trying to help me fight for it. I think we get one more appeal, but that can take up to 2 years to process, and then I have to go see a judge to appeal it. Or rather, since officially I am not considered to be competent enough to even get my own money (which is bullshit), my mom is actually the one who gets to go and defend me in court. The same drug addict that sometimes can't even get us to a simple doctor's appointment, much less a fucking court hearing, because she's too high to stand up. I have to let this person try and defend me in court. Oh, and she has said numerous times in her threats that she's going to tell them to cut me off. What a wonderful person I have, deciding things for me, right?

I feel like I'm forgetting a lot of other important details here, but this is all I can think of right now. This has been going on for my *entire life* and as you might imagine, it's all weighing extremely heavily down my my heart, and I don't think I'll be able to live like this much longer. I need a way out, a way to live on my own and be self sufficient and be away from this horrible person who wants nothing more than to get high and watch me suffer.

So... What do I do? Where do I even begin? I'm completely lost and I know I can't do this on my own...

Answer:
 I have a longer attention span than most here and only made it about 1/3rd through. Not being mean, trying to help you get more readers.

You may want to put the bulk of this in /r/offmychest, and try to repost here with facts only and a concise legal question. People will believe you here if you just say “my mom is a shitty drug addict controlling my income”, you don’t have to provide supporting anecdotes.

I am not a lawyer or a mod.Answer #2: Where is an auto tldr when you need itAnswer #3: Hey bub.  This is entirely too much text.  How about you condense it to about 5-10 sentences with only the most pertinent details and then lay out a specific question based on those sentences.Answer #4: I read through this. You can call Adult Productive Services at 1-800-962-2873 and see how they can help. The problem you're going to run into is that 1) Unless they have programs to provide housing to people in your situation, and openings, you may end up having to fend for yourself; and 2) the disabilities you have are ones that tend to be very difficult to get additional assistance beyond what you're already receiving.

You may also want to express everything you wrote here to your psychiatrist and see what they recommend.


Title: I claimed my ex on my taxes even though we broke up a year before. I heard through the grapevine that she got audited. Now I'm being audited and the FBI says I am required to come for an interview. I've never needed to speak to the IRS or the cops before. What can I expect? - Florida

Answer:
 The FBI does not really care about low level tax audits.

Did you mean IRS?


Title: (Washington State) Apartment changing lease agreement as concerns air conditioning units.

Question: So this isn't as important as many of the issues here but it's still frustrating and I wanted to know if there's anything I can do. So my apartment's management just informed me by email that I could no longer use an air conditioning unit in my living room window. There's only two windows in the apartment, the living room and the bedroom. However, in my lease agreement it clearly states that I'm allowed to place a window air conditioning unit in the living room window but not the bedroom window. I emailed them back and they pretty much said tough luck (while congratulating me for reading the lease lol) My current lease last through October of this year. Is there anything I can do, and is this alteration by management enforceable?

Answer: Most likely you are allowed to use your air conditioner, since they cannot unilaterally change a lease. However, what is THEIR reasoning for why you can't use the air conditioner any more?


Title: Parents kicked out brother at 18. Adopting him?

Question:
Hey all,

My parents kicked out my brother (not his fault, they're sort of crazy) as soon as he turned 18. He is trying to go to college (19 now) and will be filling out financial aid, but they won't help or cosign any loans or give him their info.

I am a graduate student without much money and he's living with me for now. Can I adopt him at his age and if so, will my information suffice for him to get financial aid? What dangers will I face? I can't cosign any of his loans either seeing as I am technically poorer than he is, but I figure at least he will qualify for grants and stuff if he has 'parental information' he can put on his FAFSA.

Will this work?

EDIT: Location is Maryland

Answer: You can actually apply for a waiver for parental information from the schools to which he is applying. He'll need to contact the financial aid offices at those schools.


Title: How can I get my boyfriend-to-be to live in the US?

Question: This is the situation.  I am a US citizen. I am a guy. I am 26 years old. I had a boyfriend 4 years ago in Venezuela (where no same sex marriage is legal) and although we stopped seeing each other because I moved to the US, I still care about him and would like for us to live together. However, I can only bring him over if we are married (I believe it's my only option). So what can I really do? I don't have proof of our relationship to request a fiancé visa, especially because we haven't been seeing each other this last few years. Am I doomed?

Answer:
 Not all is doomed. The K-1 fiancé visa is still your best bet. The K-3 visa is only for spouses so that's a no go.

As for the K-1 fiancé visa start up your relationship again over the interwebs and keep logs of your chats/ calls. If you truly feel for this person then take the time to build a proper history for evidence for a relationship. It is common for many couples to find and develop relationships entirely online so don't feel that there is no way for this to work given your current situation.

As for the relationship itself I would recommend r/relationships to see if your love interest is worth pursuing.

Answer #2: If he has the ability to get a tourist visa, he can come and spend some time with you in the states, and you can figure out if the relationship is still real. If so, you can then get married before he leaves. You can't adjust status with him while he's on the tourist visa; because that's going to seem like visa fraud. But getting married is perfectly legal, as long as he returns home afterwards. Once he's back in his home country you can go through the CR-1 process worth he Embassy in Venezuela.  It'll mean being apart for a while after your marriage, but it's the legal way to do it.

He could also try and find an employment based visa, although he'll usually need a degree and some skill.


Title: Let go during 2 week notice (AZ)

Question:
I got a job back in my home state and gave my employer the customary 2 week notice I was leaving and what day I wanted to be my last day. They called me into their office a few days later and told me they'd decided that day was my last day and they weren't going to honor my 2 weeks.

I understand they have the right to refuse my notice and terminate me at anytime, however what I need clarification on is whether my status should be "voluntarily resigned" or "terminated by employer".

Answer: You voluntarily resigned.


Title: My apartment complex stole my bike.

Question:
My apartment complex decided they were going to have a landscape company come and treat the yard in front of our complex. My bike was locked up next to a bunch of others underneath the stair case for winter and when these landscapers came to treat the yard they cut the locks and took our bikes.

Now I wouldn’t have a problem with that if I hadn’t had prior warning, but the thing is we had no notification. So I emailed the apartment management to reimburse me for the lock and I wanted my bike back. The emails went like this:

Me: I want my bike and lock back (insert description and cost plus picture)

Apartment management(AM): Yeah we’ll reimburse you for your bike lock and have your bike back ASAP

(2weeks later)

AM: Yeah we took your bikes but unfortunately they’ve been stolen from our warehouse, you should report your bike stolen.

My issue is I live on a college campus, I didn’t register my bike as a vehicle or whatever because it’s a bike I didn’t think I had to, but now I’m going to have to fork out another $700 for a new bike.

Is there anything I can do? My bike wouldn’t have been stolen if they hadn’t cut my lock, plus the lawn company never gave us notice. Is it possible to sue for negligence?

Answer:
 >  Is it possible to sue for negligence?

There's certainly a case to be made; especially since you have written admission that they took the bike and that the bike was then stolen.

Small claims court would be the simplest way to bring a case against them without hiring a lawyer.Answer #2: It doesn't make sense to me why they are telling you to report your bike stolen.

The apartment complex suffered the breakin at their warehouse.  Shouldn't they be the ones who report the theft?  It was your property, but it was stolen from their custody.  This sounds like something they should be handling with their insurance.  Am I wrong?Answer #3: Ask them for the police report from the warehouse break-in. Also ask them if they have insurance on their warehouse, and see if you can file a claim against their insurance. I'm not an attorney, but the bikes were in their possession when they were stolen -- without your permission -- so they should be liable to make you whole again.Answer #4: Why should he be making a claim against his renters insurance when it's building managements fault he would be claiming against theirs


Title: Importing a counterfeit item in Canada for personal use?

Question:
Just had a quick question regarding import laws in Canada. I wanted to buy a piece of jelwery thats fake and wanted it shipped to my house from China. Is that illegal if it'll be for personal use.

I was quickly reading over Bill C8 and it did seem to mention that you can import counterfeit items so long as it's for personal use and it's in your baggage. Not sure how shipping an item would fit into that.
Topic:
Canada

Answer: Wait... Canada doesn't have the Wish app? Answer #2: How counterfeit?  Many counterfeits aren't.  'It's not a fake Rolex, it's a perfectly genuine Bolex watch, that just happens to look like a Rolex...'


Title: (PA) Long story short. Money was tight. Got caught stealing a shirt I was going to wear for an interview. Clean record besides that. Retail summary offense under $60. How do I get it expunged?

Question: [deleted]

Answer: Sorry, but you have wrong information. For a summary offense expungement you must stay out of trouble for *five years* before you're eligible for it to be expunged from your record.


Title: Local news shares article about me without consent and refuses to take it down

Question:
A local (Mississippi) news website posted an article this morning that had some pretty personal information about my struggle with infertility and recurrent miscarriages. They refuse to take it down because, according to them, my father consented for me. Only he's my stepdad, and I'm a legal adult. It doesn't state my name, but gives my stepfather's name and identifying information that applies only to me. Is there anything I can do about this?

EDIT: Also, not sure if this is relevant, but I have never met the pastor mentioned in the article, so at least part of this is false.

Answer:
 comment deletedAnswer #2: Upon review of the article, I'm not sure I see a cause of action here (ed: Against the paper). You are not mentioned by name, and your step-father, while apparently quite the whack-job, is not beholden to any privacy laws regarding your medical history. His claim that you visited the pastor is on him, not on the news site. They're protected by the phrase "[Step-father] said he took his daughter..." He, not the website, is making that claim.

You're welcome to hire a lawyer and give that old "strongly-worded letter" a shot. But remember the [Streisand Effect](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Streisand_effect). Unfortunately, even your posting about the issue on Reddit has led to *more* people viewing the article, not less. Sometimes the only real solution is to let it blow over.


Title: What are my rights regarding police entering my home?

Question:
I rent part of a house in Brockport, New York, and I plan on throwing a party in a couple weeks. I don't plan on there being any underage drinking/marijuana use but I want to be prepared just in case a party guest breaks the law.

My questions are:

What should I do if the cops knock on my door mid-party?

What rights to I have in regard to not letting them inside?

Would loud music or the smell of alcohol on my breath constitute some sort of probable cause giving them the right to enter without a warrant?

Thank you!

Answer:
 > What should I do if the cops knock on my door mid-party?

Be very polite.

> What rights to I have in regard to not letting them inside?

They can ask, and you can say no. But if they have a reasonable cause, like guests that look underage and alcohol on display or people drinking, or neighbors complaining about underage drinking, or the smell of marijuana, then they can come in.

> Would loud music or the smell of alcohol on my breath constitute some sort of probable cause giving them the right to enter without a warrant?

Loud music would be a stretch, but if you are (or appear to be) under age and smell of alcohol, then they definitely could use that as probable cause.


Title: Can I use FMLA intermittently, in the year following my son's birthdate, to protect myself when taking time off to care for random illness/sickness of said son?

Question:
My son was born in January 2016. I applied for FMLA at this time, and provided a birth certificate with all necessary paperwork. FMLA was granted to me, and I have a letter in my possession that states "You are eligible for FMLA during 12 months. Your eligibility begins on January 11, 2016 and ends January 10, 2017. As of Pay Period 27, you have 480 hours of FMLA leave."

I used about 1 month of leave from January-February to care for my recovering wife and newborn son. My question is this: can I continue to take FMLA-qualified leave to care for my son if he becomes sick--say, with the common cold?

The reason why I ask is because my son was sick yesterday. I took one day off to care for him, and submitted a time off request for that day, coding it as FMLA-qualified leave. My HR and supervisor denied this, stating that this was not FMLA-qualified, and that I need to provide a doctor's note.

EDIT: location is California.
Topic:
Employment Law

Answer:
 They are correct. While the "birth and bonding" period extends for 12 months after the birth, intermittent "birth and bonding" FMLA protected leave is up to the employer.  And a common cold does not qualify as a serious medical issue unless hospitalization is required so no help there.

https://www.dol.gov/whd/regs/compliance/whdfs28f.pdf


Title: Want to move my 17 year old girlfriend out of her house in Texas. Options?

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 I'd urge you to reconsider: you're barely 18 and haven't graduated high school. I don't know how/why you are living with a band and not your parents, or how you're paying rent for the house. What if you lose/get kicked out of the house?

Does your girlfriend have other family members or family friends she could stay with (possibly with her mother's approval)? (Is her dad in the picture? Any older siblings?) Has she talked to a counselor at school about the emotional abuse? Can she apply for a job without her mother knowing and sabotaging the situation?

I don't think you can get married to her without her mother's consent.
If it comes a point that you're worried about your girlfriend's mental health and safety, get her to a doctor. If she is suicidal, get her to a hospital.


Title: Seasonal Wetland Spring destroyed by power company without notice, OR, USA.

Question:
John owns the property and rents it to Ted. Ted has always paid his utility bills on time, and maintained a decent relationship with all of the utility companies that serve him.
The property is rural, and an investment property. It's value is in it's privacy, fertility, closeness to town, and it's spring, which feeds four ponds and a seasonal creek vital to the area. This spring provides irrigation to several other agricultural properties. John has the water rights to this spring, and chooses to let it be natural and unaltered, and share the water with the other homeowners and farmers in the neighborhood. The spring has always been a home for multiple wildlife, possibly including some endangered wildlife.

Two days ago, the local power company claimed "Easement rights" on the property and clear cut a 300 ft x 30 ft area of spring water wetland through the property around power lines (owned by John). This will detrimentally affect the quality of water through the creek, and has drastically diminished the value of the property, both in timber and desirability. There is no longer untouched wetland. There is no longer ultimate privacy. They took all the timber they cut, which was possibly worth thousands. Tens of thousands.

They left no notice. When John called to ask why they clear cut his property, the power company admitted that they left no notice, and had no record of any permission being given. They claimed that it was legal as they had "easement rights" even though the lines were paid for by John, and I think ultimately John's property.

We would like to sue the power company for destroying our property and the seasonal wetland.

They also admitted that before they were caught cutting down all the trees, they were planning on applying herbicide to the area, potentially destroying farms nearby. The area they cut is a spring and would carry those herbicides via the creek it feeds to the surrounding agricultural area.

Do we have any legal grounds to sue?

If we can sue, what kind of non-profits would take our case? If there are no non-profits, what kind of lawyer should we hire? Collectively, we have the means, but not the way. We absolutely want to hold the power company responsible for the damage they caused to both the seasonal wetland and our property. I feel that many other rural homeowners could be saved by improved legislation regarding property intrusion by companies.

We are in rural Oregon, US.

Thank you for your input. I have no idea where to start.
P.S.
If the power company had given notice, John would have paid for the power company to move their power lines 20 ft, so it was over the driveway and not the spring. Or he could have run on generator power, or put up solar panels, or a wind turbine, or even a seasonal water turbine. There were plenty of other options other than clear cutting the property.
P.S.S.
The property is only a few miles away from a wildlife sanctuary, and they can provide previous research on the wetlands and it's inhabitants in question. I don't know if that could help our case or not.
Topic:
Real Estate law

Answer:
 If there is a valid easement the utility can come in and clear it, but they would owe you the fair market value of that timber, as it was not their property to take.

30x300 is a heck of a lot of firewoodAnswer #2: INAL but your state Department of Environmental Protection would probably be interested in this. Answer #3: Encroaching on wetlands usually requires state environmental permiting.  Call the Oregon Department of Environmental Quality and state that you suspect a utility encroached on wetlands without a permit or land owner approval and you are concerned about impact to water quality and wetland destruction. Answer #4: You need a really good lawyer.Answer #5: While there may be a better specialist, a good place to start would be a real estate attorney.


Title: Found money

Question:
So a couple days ago my girlfriend was cleaning our apartment when she came across a ladies wallet with around $1200 in it under our bathroom sink. We have been living in our apartment a little over six months and are nearly 100% sure it wasn't there to begin with. We are also thinking there's a possibility that it could be her brothers potential drug money (he was in prison for a couple years for drugs but we thought he wasn't doing that anymore) but we just don't know. She said she doesn't want to do anything with it for 30 days to see if anyone claims it. But I figure since it's money we found in our place we are safe to spend it anyway we want. So I guess the question is should we wait or since it's "our" property we can do what we want.

Edit: can't figure out how to edit through mobile. Sorry for lack of info in title was supposed to be a rough draft and forgot.
Location: USA MI

Answer:
 Is there any identification in the wallet or just the cash?

She can and should take it to the local police station. As a rule they'll do an investigation and if the owner doesn't claim it within a period of time, typically 30 to 90 days, they'll give it back to her.

Does her drug dealing brother have access to your apartment? If so, money may not be the only thing he is hiding there. 3:00 AM drug raids aren't fun and generally the aftermath isn't pretty in terms of the mess left by law enforcement.

Take a mirror and a flashlight and look up under the sink. See if there's evidence of duct tape or something that may have held the wallet and come loose.


Title: Do I have to sign an "Update" to a rental agreement- California

Question:
So my rental agreement has a page that says the owners pay for water,sewage,and garbage. I noticed that since I moved in mid November (first apartment) my utility bill has charged me about $40 a month for sewage. I contacted the property management company (one town over) and they told me to send a bill for reimbursement. Yesterday I put together a little evelope with a copy of all the bills, a copy of the page of the agreement and highlighted the sewage part, and a polite letter explaining the issue and sent it, so they haven't even got it yet. This morning the onsight manager woke me up to say that there was a "mistake" on the rental agreement and the only change was they took sewage out. I told him I wanted to contact the management company before I signed anything. My housing is through HUD and even they confirmed that owners pay water,sewage,garbage. Do I HAVE to sign the new page of the agreement? Other than this I am a perfect tenant. Quiet, clean, always pay on time, and non-smoker. Thanks for any advice.

Edit: I have been told by the owners that the HUD lease does not state the owners pay sewage. The property management company is sending a copy of that lease. I could swear I was told while signing that lease that sewage was covered by the owners. I'm waiting for a call from my case worker to get my own copy. I was wondering if there is anyway the owner may be able to "update" the lease with HUD before I can get to it tomorrow. $40/month to a broke college student like me is a pretty good hit.
Topic:
Landlord Tenant Housing

Answer: No, if you have a signed lease you do not have to sign any new "update" agreement. They must honor the lease you have mutually agreed to if it states that sewage is included in the rent.Answer #2: Do not sign!  They are on the hook for these charges and they are obligated to pay.


Title: How do criminals such as the Christchurch terrorist get lawyers?

Question:
I remember reading an article about the Christchurch shooter and how he fired his lawyer and requested to represent himself in court and my first initial thought is "how does someone of that calibre GET a lawyer in the first place" like he was caught on the scene red handed? How do you choose to represent someone with such an impossible case and then also have the morality to chose to do so?

thanks x!

&#x200B;

Answer:
 Obviously Christchurch is not in the US, so I can't speak to them in particular.

But in the US, if you can't afford a lawyer, one is appointed to you--regardless of your crime.

If you can afford a lawyer, you probably can still find one.

Here's why: without defense lawyers, the entire system breaks down.  Our justice system is based on the idea of fair representation and a fair trial, and if you start limiting that--saying that not everyone has a right to those protections--then it quickly goes from just the really heinous criminals not having those protections, to your everyday joe schmoe who did something bad to one other person not having those protections.

And I get that some people will still say that your average murderer or rapist should not have a lawyer.  But people tend to change their tune when it's their friend or loved one who has been arrested for a crime and needs a lawyer.

I'm not a defense lawyer, but I understand why people are--they are absolutely essential to our system of justice and without them, corruption and unfair persecution and sentencing would be a terrifying reality for all of us.Answer #2: Lawyers for particularly heinous crimes where culpability is really not in doubt, like terrorist attacks, will sometimes make statements to the public affirming the seriousness of the crimes but reminding everyone that even despicable people have rights that must be protected. Rarely are they actually claiming the defendant should be totally set free, rather they’re making sure that the state doesn’t overstep.


Title: [Texas] New property not professional cleaned as stated upon lease signing. Carpet is covered in dog strains and wreaks of dog pee.

Question:
Writing this on my phone. I apologize for any typos.

We just signed a lease for an older duplex. When we walked in the house it wreaked of dog pee and we discovered the living room floor to be covered in dog stains. I'm not sure how we missed the stains the first time. The lighting was different. The AC being turned off made the house incredibly hot and the smell from the carpet incredible.

When we signed the lease, it's stated as a requirement that the tenant pay for professional cleaning and provide a receipt. This was obviously not done prior to our move in. Besides the dog smell and stains the house is filthy. Dust, cobwebs, food stains everywhere.

Am I within reason to demand the house be professionally cleaned or receive a rent credit to take care of it ourselves? Additionally, because of the smell and amount of staining I'm pretty sure it's soaked into the padding meaning the carpet should just be replaced.

What is my best course of action? The property is managed by a property manager instead of the actual landlord if it makes any difference.

Thanks in advance.

Answer: Don't move in. Return the keys and demand a full refund of any rent and deposit. The unit is not like the lease says it must be so they have breached. Take pictures/videos of everything to prove it.


Title: [West Virginia] This might be a silly question but am I going to go to jail? Will I be fined?

Question: So I have a food card and I forgot to call the DHHR about a change in income. It's been about a month and a half. Will I have to repay the food money I spent? Will I just not recieve money next month? I've been very very stressed and I honestly forgot.

Answer: Just call now and report the change in income. They will let you know if you need to pay anything back.


Title: (MA) Employer charging to access W2

Question:
When I log on to the paperless employee site my employer (big retail chain) seems to be charging $10 to access my W2 form. It has the option to either save as PDF, fax, or mail, but all of them say "$10." Is this legal? Is it a misunderstanding?
Topic:
Tax Law

Answer:
 If it's an old one, my understanding is that a small charge isn't uncommon.

If it's a current W2, no, they still have to just give it to you if you don't pay. You basically have to play chicken though until they blink. Send a CYA email that you do not wish to receive an electronic copy and request that the W2 be given to you in person or mailed to you by the deadline of January 31st [which has past, so mention that]. ([You have the right to do so. See this doc](https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/p1141.pdf) Section 2.4.02 – Electronic Delivery of Form W-2 and W-2c Recipient Statements) Do not pay them.

If you have yet to receive your W-2 form by February 14, fill out Form 4852, and contact the IRS at 1-800-829-1040 if you feel you need more information. In Section 10, say that you sent a written request that your W2 be handed to you in person or mailed to your address on X, and your employer did not do so.Answer #2: I'm a small business who uses ADP, and all of my employees can access their records for free.

This is bullshit.Answer #3: Is this a small company? I've never heard of this before.


Title: Practicing law in California with only a Pennsylvania license?

Question:
Hi All,

Was wondering if there is any way to practice law in CA if I only have a PA license.  For example, I hear if you go in house, you don't need to take the state bar exam.  Was wondering if there are any other such opportunities?  For example, any Federal law opportunities?

Please don't crucify me, I'm just trying to find the easiest and best way to make a make a move and keep my career.

Thanks

Answer: You're an attorney and you don't know how to look for the answer?


Title: [US, AZ] I rear ended a large suv on a freeway with my sedan. No one was hurt. But now it sounds otherwise and I'm really worried

Question:
[deleted]
Topic:
Personal Injury

Answer:
 Neck and back pain don't always present immediately when an accident happens.  The pain can manifest in a few days, so it's not surprising that she's feeling it now.  And just because you had the smaller car doesn't mean that she still can't have injuries.

Don't talk to the person you hit anymore.  Go through your insurance company and let them handle it.  You had insurance, so let them do the job you're paying them to do.  If she does sue you, she'll need to go through the insurance company first and exceed the limits to your coverage before a suit.

Finally, take this as a lesson not to follow so closely.  Give you and the people ahead of you space so that if someone stops suddenly, you won't run full bore into them.


Title: [VA] Is it possible for a sibling to gain custody of their minor sibling when the parents get divorced?

Question:
Hi all, please let me know if I need to add more detail or change the formatting.

I'll try to keep it brief: My parents are going through a nasty divorce, and there is a custody battle for my almost 17 year old sibling. Originally, there was a custody agreement in place where my mother would be granted 100% physical custody, but both parents would split legal custody (I may be misunderstanding this as my knowledge of family law is mostly just through the advice I read here). Recently my mother had been taking medications prescribed to her from her psychologist, and it turned out she was given an abnormally high dosage of these medications, leaving her unable to function for periods of time. My dad's lawyer found out and is "filing a motion to have my mom declared an unfit parent" (mom's words, haven't seen the email myself yet). My father was incredibly abusive and would likely resume his manipulative habits if granted custody of my sibling. He also recently had to go to court for a felony drug charge. However, in the event that the court decided my mom is not fit to have custody of my sibling, would I (a 20 year old college student) be able to ask for custody? I have a part time job but can work full time and put off school until my sibling is an adult if needed, and I have heard there are government support programs for people in similar positions. If that seems to not be an option, what other legal options might I or my mom have to ensure my dad doesn't gain custody of my sibling? Thanks in advance for any advice or corrections.
Topic:
Custody Divorce and Family

Answer: You won't get custody unless both of your parents are deemed to be unfit.


Title: Post-divorce, ex is claiming I'm in contempt of court. Marriage dissolution is very vague.

Question: 6 months I finalized my divorce, the dissolution stripulates that I'm to pay 1/2 of his credit card debt. There is no timeline or monthly payment amount laid out. He is trying to have me held in contempt of court because I refused to pay him "x amount per month" because I said we needed to come up with a payment plan that I could actually afford and refused and got an attorney. I already incurred a significant portion of debt myself post divorce (self employed with a pretty bad dry spell this fall plus the cost of the divorce, moving out and losing my ex's income). What happens if I file for bankruptcy to the cards in his name?

Answer: This is beyond the scope of Reddit.  Contact a divorce attorney.


Title: I filed a writ of certiorari. now what? Wisconsin

Question: I had to file a writ of certiorari pro se in county circuit court. Now what happens? I need to know the process that happens with the court until I actually appear in front of the judge.

Answer:
 A cert? In a county court? Pro se? On what, exactly?

Most likely now you wait a few weeks for somebody to tell you that it was denied.

Edit to add: [Here](http://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/2xqmy4/need_an_opinion_in_wisconsin_if_i_submitted_the/) is OP's previous post.


Title: (NJ) Landlord withheld month's rent from security deposit citing lack of ability to find a new tenant

Question:
My landlord is refusing to return any amount of my security deposit, citing his inability to find a new tenant.  I gave 40 days notice of my departure (though the lease says 60 days); he claims this was not sufficient time to find a new tenant.  But a tenant moved in the day after I moved out; in fact the new tenant was moving in when I was still moving out, two days before the end of my lease.  When I inquired about the new tenant, he claimed the new tenant was living there rent free until the place was "presentable"; thus my security deposit was to be used for lost rent.

Thoughts?

Answer:
 > When I inquired about the new tenant, he claimed the new tenant was living there rent free until the place was "presentable"; thus my security deposit was to be used for lost rent.

Oh that's fucking cute. Sue them in small claim's court for the amount they're withholding.

While they could generally go after you for the additional month to cover the notice period, they cannot double dip. If they moved a tenant in, it's on them.


Title: [MA] Mother putting brother on mortgage for no reason, how can I prevent this?

Question:
My mother just put her entire life-savings into house and is closing next week. My brother is going to be moving in with her "so that she isn't lonely and he can take care of her."

My mother said he needs to be on the mortgage but cannot explain the reason. I believe he is scheming to get the house when she dies or is put in a home (he has screwed her out of money in the past and is an overall free-loader).

I have tried to talk to her but she insists he needs to be on the mortgage. Is there something I am missing as to why he should be on the mortgage? Is there a way to prevent this from happening?

Answer:
 The most obvious reason would be that she can't afford the mortgage on her own. Answer #2: You need to define what your mean by "on the mortgage."

Is he cosigning on the loan for the home?


Title: Teacher hits disabled son? What can I do?

Question:
Hello guys,
I'm from the Washington State and I have an autistic son who just turned 18. He does not have the ability to speak or write. He can take care of himself for the most part but does have his occasional temper tantrum. I've always had an uncomfortable relationship with the teacher in the classroom and always felt like she never worked with my son very well. But just recently she was caught, abusing and hitting my son in the chest a number of times, by other teachers and now I am hearing that this actually might have been happening for the past couple years. The police department came to the school and wrote a report and she has been removed from the school. What should my first step be? I'm going to the police station to obtain the police report. Any help would be great. THANK YOU!

Answer:
 >I'm going to the police station to obtain the police report

While there, ask to speak with whatever detective is assigned to the case.  When talking with that detective, express your interest and resolve in seeing justice done.  That detective should then explain to you what happens on the criminal side of things.

If you are looking for the civil side of things, you would likely need to talk to a personal injury attorney.


Title: [VA] My father is leaving my mother. What should she do?

Question: My mother is 64 years old. She's a retired church secretary. My father is still working, making good money, and has a large sum in retirement. He just revealed today that he has been having an affair for 14 years, and is leaving my mother. My main concern is that she is taken care of. What should I advise her to do?

Answer:
 She should get an attorney.

Other than that, get the most recent copies of any joint accounts to have documentation of what the current balance is in case he drains it, change any passwords for her own private accounts, make sure her bank accounts and credit cards are secured enough that he couldn't make unauthorized transaction, and try to keep a level head. This is emotionally challenging, so she should not hesitate to seek counseling if needed.


Title: (OH) My friend's abuser works at a domestic violence shelter. I notified the shelter, did I fuck up?

Question:
My friend had an affair with a woman twice her age which resulted in an emotionally abusive relationship with this woman for around two years. My friend applied and got a CPO filed against her abuser in December and that CPO is valid until February. I, her friend, called her abuser's work on Tuesday to notify her work about this, which I know was probably a stupid thing to do but I am tired of this back and forth bullshit and it terrifies me that she is in a position of power over people who, like my friend, are at extremely vulnerable states in their life. If she didn't work at a domestic violence shelter I would not be have even considered calling, all I want is her out of our lives and I am afraid this might have dragged her back in.

On Wednesday the woman violated the protection order by messaging her on Tumblr. I took my friend to the police station and we filed a report.

On Thursday her work called me back and asked for details which I provided. I want to emphasize that everything I said was true and anything that was relevant but I did not have direct proof of I made sure to specify. A few hours later I stopped by my friends house and we received a call from the police who stated that neither her nor I could not contact her abuser's place of work.

My question: are there any legal ramifications for what I did? Can I get in trouble for notifying her work and can my friend get in trouble for me doing so?

Answer:
 Probably not. But it's going to depend on what you said.

Did you stick to the facts? Did you call anyone names? Did you add your opinions? Did you call for them to be fired? Did you threaten to boycott the employer unless they took action? Did you threaten legal action?

It's possible that a harassment claim could come out of this. That's going to boil down to the specifics.


Title: Friend dealing with a stalker

Question: I have a friend who is currently dealing with a very determined stalker. She doesn't know him personally, (friend of an estranged family member, family member can't/won't help). She's attempted to file a restraining order but he went so far as to change his address at the DMV to her address so the police couldn't serve him the court papers. They said it's her problem to find an updated address but she really does not have the money for a detective. He uses a spoofer online for phone numbers so those can't be tracked and has threatened to break in/hurt her on multiple occasions. The police seem unwilling/unable to do anything. He has been harrassing both her and her sister. Are there any more legal avenues she could try? This is in Ohio.

Answer: There's a list of domestic violence organizations in Ohio if you search "Ohio" on womenslaw.org. Those groups often know the local laws and may have advice on how other women in Ohio have served stalkers whose addresses are unknown. Those organizations will be free to call. Good luck!


Title: (CA) 23 years ago, dissolution of Marriage, Mother lived in Asia and didn't speak English. Father was cheating and won because mom could not appear in California court. Can this divorce be disputed now?

Question:
Thinking about how to ask for help on this and even where to start has been a struggle for me and I have been afraid of what the outcome of this could be, if I were told that we couldn't do anything about this.

&#x200B;

My birth dad and mom met when he came to Asia and soon after they were married and had two kids, I being the youngest of the two. He came from a semi wealthy family in California and was afforded the luxury of traveling to different countries and met my mom as he traversed through Asia. They were together for 6 years and towards the later stages of their marriage my mom had found written checks to one of his masseuse for hundreds of dollars to this woman. She did not speak English well but had been over to California to meet his family and live around their San Francisco house.

A couple of months later he had told her that he needed to go back for a small amount of time to deal with family issues and their business, which was a several million dollar construction company. Few weeks pass as he's over in the states and she's with her two children in Asia, she receives a letter for the dissolution of marriage. She could not comprehend most of the language in said documents and the emotional toll it took on her was devastating. The court then decides that because she did not respond or show up that their marriage is dissolved due to irreconcilable differences.

&#x200B;

The part's of the dissolution state that he was supposed to get full custody of us children but we were left with our mother in Asia with no child support (due to him supposedly having to take custody) and that my mother were to pay him over 30,000 usd. She later found out that the woman he had been writing checks to is now his current wife and they live happily in California. My mother had to suffer through this divorce and raise us by herself, leaving to come to the states to work and send money back to us so we could afford proper schooling.

I am now a sound adult and am looking to see what our options could be, if my mother has a fighting chance against the way this divorce played out. Should I look to go back at him for lack of support through our lives as we had to grow up struggling until brought over to America and even then lived at the poverty line.

&#x200B;

Thank you for taking the time to read this and I would appreciate any advice given.

Answer:
 You cannot do anything whatsoever, and are not entitled to any money.

Your mother can speak to a family law attorney if she wishes to do so, but chances are high that it is far, far too late to revisit anything that happened in this divorce.


Title: [RI] Boring question: National Grid told me I'm responsible for previous tenant's debt, I can't find the law saying this?

Question:
I'm in Rhode Island. The person who held my apartment's gas account with National Grid before me accumulated over a thousand dollars worth of unpaid gas bills. She told me this was because National Grid "forgot to send the bills" which I don't believe at all, but that's neither here nor there.

In June, when I tried to open my own account following hers closing, this somehow got transferred to me. I'm still not sure why. I was told there was already an account associated with the apartment (hers) and so I wasn't allowed to open a new one? But she'd closed her account by that point and at that time the gas had actually been shut off so I was intending to start my own account to initiate gas service... not sure what happened.

Gas got reconnected but I recently got a notice about her 1K+ debt. I called today to explain what I just said, that it was from the previous tenant/account holder for the apartment.

I was told that according to something called Title 39 and "benefit of service" in Rhode Island, I'm legally responsible for the unpaid bills. Now I looked up Title 39 but can't find anywhere in it that describes my situation. I can't find anything for this "benefit of service" thing and what that means, either.

Was that bullshit or am I not reading the correct documents? I'd appreciate any clarification on this situation, thanks!

Answer:
 1) this happens sometimes, in some jurisdictions it's legal. 2) (if the indebted no longer inhabits the property), then it appears to me that title 39 [expressly asserts otherwise](http://webserver.rilin.state.ri.us/Statutes/TITLE39/39-2/39-2-1.1.HTM):

>No public utility shall refuse to furnish services to new occupants at any premises on the grounds that the previous occupant has vacated the premises without paying the public utility for services furnished, provided that the service is not for the use or benefit of the previous occupant. Answer #2: Are you related in any way to the previous tenant?Answer #3: Almost always the way to get out of this situation is that you provide a lease showing that you're a brand new tenant. Since it sounds like you're not, and the account was for your roommate, you're likely not going to get service back on until the bill is paid. Otherwise what is to stop three roommates from cycling through accounts in their names for a year to get free electricity or gas?


Title: [FL] Retaliation after reporting sexual harassment of another employee by their supervisor

Question:
Hi /r/legaladvice.

I'm in a supervisor position. An employee approached me on Facebook and reported that her own supervisor has been acting really shady. He's been sending her dick pics, and got really nasty toward her when she rejected his advances. I went to my supervisors, and he was demoted, but then given his position back on the team two weeks later. After that, the guy's manager was being incredibly icy toward me, telling me that I shouldn't have gotten involved in his team's business. Now my manager has gotten inexplicably icy toward me, and hitting me with bogus write-ups, detailing meetings that never happened, and not reaching tasks that were never assigned to me.

Now, I was sent a "meeting recap" from a meeting that supposedly happened two weeks ago, but never did, regarding my performance.

This is screaming set-up to me. Am I about to be wrongfully terminated?

Answer: You need to start documenting *everything* **now**! We know as much as you do whether you're going to be terminated.


Title: Picture of my friend and I near alcohol

Question: So my friend and I (both 18) are in Europe on vacation and we took a really good picture of us at a restaurant, and want to post it on social media, but there’s open beer bottles from other people at our table in the picture. Are there any legal issues with posting this picture?

Answer: If it’s legal to drink in the country where you were located at the time the picture was taken then there is no issue.  The laws where you are located at the time are the ones that apply.


Title: What can an employer dock your pay for in VA?

Question: My boss is charging every employee $25 if they do not get 2 google reviews for our business a month. Im in the process of leaving this company but just want to know the legality of this. I have never signed or verbally agreed to these deductions.

Answer: No, that is not a lawful deduction from your paycheck.


Title: My girlfriend got bullied by her manager until she quitted her job

Question:
She worked as a waitress in a sports bar that is literally 1 minute away from our place. There is a lot of corruption but she loves her ex-coworkers and she made good money.

There is a manager who has a romance with the bartender, everyone knows but they don't have much evidence just screenshots of some of their text messages.

Nevertheless my girlfriend had to miss a family event because she was forced to cover the shifts of that bartender who couldn't work because she was "super sick".

My girlfriend got informed that the bartender went to a music festival and we saw her snapchats raving on drugs.

My girlfriend called her out and the fight escalated, later other girls heard the bartender telling the manager that my girlfriend needs to get fired.

The next week after that incident the manager told my girlfriend that she was getting punished for fighting with coworkers, he forced her to clean after other girls, gave her the worst sections and started sending her home early.

My girlfriend walked away yesterday because he was being a jerk and telling her she should quit. she just left without saying a word and hasn't signed a resignation letter.

She still wants to work there because the other managers are great it's only that guy, we don't know what to do.

Could we take legal actions?

EDIT: we live in Ontario Canada

Answer: none of that is illegal, girlfriend shouldn't be picking fights at work. also, where is this corruption I was promised in the second sentence?


Title: TX - how is this legal? Parents forced 17 year old into pray the gay away camp.

Question:
Several news stories on the internet about this. Parents do not agree with their kids choice in partner. Girl x girl. So they forced her against her will into one of these camps. The girl even tried to escape but was caught by the staff.

A link to one of the news stories here.
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/progressivesecularhumanist/2016/06/tv-star-fights-to-rescue-cousin-from-pray-away-the-gay-facility/

Its been a long time since I was 17 and cared about laws concerning minors. So how is this legal? Morality and political thoughts aside, LEGALLY how can a 17 yr old's parents force her to go against her will?

Answer: Morality and political thoughts aside, it's legal in Texas because it has not been made illegal. Parents have the ultimate control over their minor children and there hasn't been a law passed forbidding the practice, nor has an existing law been widely interpreted as forbidding it in that state.


Title: Ticket altered after being issued.

Question:
Quick question about a technical issue on my ticket from Manitoba, Canada.
Received a traffic ticket for going over the speed limit on my motorcycle. When i was handed my ticket, the "motor vehicle" box was checked, and "motorcycle" box was unchecked.

I obtained the officer notes and court copy of ticket. It did not match my summons, as the officer version had additionally checked off "motorcycle" on his copy after the fact.

I am wondering if they are allowed to change information without reissuing me the ticket.
Thanks

Answer: There's nothing wrong with that; he was making sure the information he provided was as accurate as possible and clarified on the version that has been included with your summons. This is inconsequential and wouldn't affect the outcome of your case or allow for any additional action on your part.


Title: VA “reckless driving” for going 84 in a 65

Question: So I was on hour 7 of 9 driving to visit my girlfriend for the weekend when I hit 495 in Virginia. I decided that the express lane would be worth the $2 to knock a few minutes off the trip. Until I got pulled over for going 84mph in a 65. In Virginia it’s automatically a reckless driving charge if you get caught going over 80mph. So, the police officer wrote me a court summons for May 15th. However, I am in the army and am unable to go to court in Virginia that day. My friend said that he had a similar charge and had to hire a lawyer for $1200 to get his case moved back and get the charge dropped to a speeding ticket. I think my mitigating factors are that it was in the express lane, there were no other cars around, and I don’t have any prior speeding tickets. Is it worth it to hire a lawyer or should I fight this on my own? Also, can I get a court date moved if I am in the army? Thanks!

Answer:
 >I think my mitigating factors are that it was in the express lane, there were no other cars around, and I don’t have any prior speeding tickets

None of those are mitigating factors for conviction, because the law is "per se reckless by speed".     It's reckless solely because of the speed you were going, not because of the lane you were traveling in, or the density of traffic.

Your clean record might be a factor in your attorney's ability to get your a reduction in the charge.

Your duty status does not factor into your court scheduling in any statutory way;   the clerk or judge might cut soldiers a break, but there's nothing similar to the Servicemembers Civil Relief Act that applies to criminal court while you're Stateside.

See if your friend still has his attorney's name handy.Answer #2: Virginia? Get a lawyer.

You’re being charged with a crime. This is not just some administrative ticket. If you screw this up any more you will have a criminal record.Answer #3: >Is it worth it to hire a lawyer

Yes

> should I fight this on my own?

No

>can I get a court date moved if I am in the army?

Your lawyer can argue this.


Title: Is this clause in my lease enough to get my roommates girlfriend taken off the property?

Question:
The short of it: my roommates girlfriend is not on our lease, but she has been here every day for the past 2 weeks, sleeping over, ect. even though my roommate is aware I am not comfortable with this and he told me she wouldn't be basically living here. She doesn't pay rent or help with bills.

The only clause in our lease about this sort of thing is:

A. Occupants: Tenant may use the Property as a private residence only. The only persons Tenant may permit to reside on the
Property during the term of this lease are (include names and ages of all occupants): [names redacted]

The listed tenants are myself and my 2 roommates. Is this clause enough to have her taken off the property or am I just stuck because she has his permission to be here?

Answer:
 It's enough for your landlord to evict all of you for cause, in most jurisdictions. As joint tenants you are all liable for a breach.

You have no authority to prevent your roommate from subletting as such, although he will be liable to you if you have losses due to his decision to breach your lease.


Title: Im 21 years old, and my mom can still make a phone call to have me institutionalized. How is this legal? Can i fight it?

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 The last paragraph is more than 2/3 of it !!!

Anyone can call the police on anyone and let them know they are a danger to themselves. If police respond, anyone could be placed under a (usual) 72 hour med hold (varies by state, but thats the norm) to make sure you aren't a danger.

Only way to stop it is to get yourself better. Because its your mom, cops are more willing to listen. If I did it, they might listen, might think I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about. We assume your mom knows though.

You really never heard stories of internet strangers calling police for people who said they would commit suicide or such on web cam? This isn't a new thing.Answer #2: every state has laws about involuntary psychiatric holds.  that's what happened to you.  no matter your age, if you are determined to be a **be a danger to self/others, OR be unable to provide for basic physical needs, such as essential food, clothing, medical care and shelter, AND be unable to survive safely in freedom or guard against serious harm** you can be committed against your will.

the fact of the matter is you 100% are a danger to yourself AND to others, and you are not able protect yourself from harm or care for yourself.  you proved all of those points in this post.

 the way to stop these things from happening is to stop being a danger to yourself and others.


Title: [KS] wife subject to harassment/discrimination by management.

Question:
My wife is a certified nurse midwife (CNM) and a family nurse practitioner (FNP) in a rural, critical access hospital. Several years ago she started having some significant health issues which led to a diagnosis of chronic variable immune disorder (CVID). These health issues led to a reduction in clinic hours and finally a group decision by us, our primary care doctor (an employee at the hospital as well), and management to move her out of the health clinic to limit contact with acutely sick patients. At that point they were in the process of planning/building a new facility, and it was hoped that the new facility would allow my wife to better avoid contact with the acutely ill. At the time this move to partial disability was touted as “revenue neutral” for us. Since this move to disability my wife has been subject to a stream of small moves that I believe are aimed at marginalizing her and making it clear that management doesn’t want her around. She’s been told she’s not needed at meetings she was previously a member to. The latest is a push her into a “education coordinator” role at half her original pay. Or approximately half, they want her to agree to the job before even giving her details about it such as pay, responsibilities, or organization structure. She has been told the possibility of her returning to clinic work is basically zero. The stated reason is that there aren’t enough patients (practice added a physician shortly after she went on disability), however I know the docs in the clinic are busy.

CVID is a category of a larger health condition called “primary immunodeficiency”, which is considered a disability by the federal government. So this discussion somewhat hinges on what her rights are as a person with a disability who is being marginalized at their job. I think management understands that they can’t quite fire her (either from a legal standpoint or from a social one, she’s fairly well liked by the docs), but if she’s treated like shit they can get her to quit.

It also hinges on “meaningful accommodation” for her in a clinical setting. How unreasonable is it to ask a primary care practice to accommodate a medical provider who shouldn’t see the acutely ill? There’s still a plethora of patients she can see. Yearly Physicals, pre-op physicals, yearly well women exams, pregnancy and postpartum visits....the list is extensive.

We’ve scheduled appointments with a couple local attorneys, but I’d love to hear input on this and I’ll update the main post as best I can with more information as it’s asked for.

Answer:
 > How unreasonable is it to ask a primary care practice to accommodate a medical provider who shouldn’t see the acutely ill?

Your wife's position as a health care provider makes that somewhat unreasonable. Having worked in medicine for many years, administrative-wise, it's difficult and unwieldy to cherry-pick patients for one provider to see. It sounds that so far, her employer has made several accommodations to her illness.

See what the local attorney says when you give more specifics. Good luck.