Title: [Illinois, USA] I was raped, repetedly over several years, and forced into things by an ex. I forgave it, but my ex got an order of protection against me, after I blew up at him online.

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 > What do I do to expose everything that happened? What they did to me, and press charges?

Go to the police and make a report.


Title: [Burlington MA] My car was towed from my apartment complex because a "reserved" sign was buried in snow. Help!

Question:
On Friday night I parked in what I thought was a legitimate parking spot in my apartment complex. When I went to get my car on Satuday night it was gone. I called the maintenance number and they said it was parked in a reserve spot and was towed on Saturday (I was not contacted even though my car is registered with the apartments). I went back to the spot and took a bunch of pictures.

[I was parked in the spot is where the brown car on the left is parked.](http://imgur.com/cgpVihA)

If you look very carefully the black dot by the antenna of the silver car is the 99% covered "RESERVED" sign for the spot NEXT to where I was parked. The sign in my parking spot was COMPLETELY covered and I had no way to know.

The cost to get my car back is $165 and I dont think I should have to pay this. I am going to speak with the apartment offices today because they were closed yesterday.

Should I threaten to take them to small claims court? What is my best approach when I go speak with them?

**UPDATE:**
The apartment management is claiming that when the towing company came on saturday the signs were visible. If this is true then someone must have shoveled them off on Saturday before the tow truck came, then they got covered again by all the falling snow and snowblowers for my pictures. If the signs got cleared after my car was already there would that mean I am in the wrong? Would I have to somehow prove in small claims court that they were cleared off AFTER I parked there?

Answer:
 You may have a point, but you need to get you car out asap or you'll keep accruing fees.  It doesn't work like "you demand payment and they pay to get your car out." It works like you have to go get it out and then deal with reimbursement later. For example,  you already left it there apparently,  so whatever fees are in excess of 165 now will be on you.

Also,  how long have you lived there?


Title: Disgruntled employee stole patients' contact info, what should I do?

Question:
So this actually happened to my mom, she's not very tech savvy so I thought I would ask reddit on her behalf.  She recently had to fire an employee due to her behavior towards her team members and several unscheduled absences. My mom runs a dialysis clinic, so every tech and nurse is essential, and an unscheduled absence can be very detrimental to the quality of care delivered to patients. After firing this employee, patients told my mom that they were getting calls from this employee telling them that she was fired under false pretenses. Is there any legal action the company can take towards this person?
Edit: We're in Houston, TX.

Answer: Consult with her business attorney about writing a cease and desist and other steps.


Title: Grandparents forced from assisted living into skilled nursing

Question: [removed]

Answer:
 Assisted living is designed for people who need some help with cooking and cleaning, etc.  It’s by definition (based on federal regulations) not a medical facility, like a nursing home.  Those places often only have a nurses’ aide for 50 residents overnight, and the most they can do is call an ambulance for the residents.

Dementia patients are almost always too high need to be in an assisted living.  And it sounds like your grandparents need more care than the facility is comfortable providing.

If so, I think it’s totally appropriate to move them to the nursing home wing.  The facility risks liability if they kept them in the assisted living and something happened.

Your only option is to see if a different assisted living would take them. I don’t see how the facility is doing anything wrong here. Their admission papers likely have language about being healthy enough to remain in the assisted living.


Title: Suing the Department of Education Victoria

Question: I need advice regarding how the schooling system has put me at an unfair disadvantage. In school I always strive to do my best, just last year (year 9) was extremely frustrating. Pretty much the only frustrating thing about it was that my English teacher wasn't teaching me anything, I completed all work to an A or A+ standard and never forgot to hand him homework. Multiple times throughout the year I have tried to express that I'm not learning anything, I am certain that my classmates will remember me saying 'When will we start learning something, I haven't learnt anything all year' or something along those lines. It gets to the end of the year and I receive my report, I then notice that I have made no progress at all throughout the entire semester. I then read the comments about how I have completed all of my work to a consistently high standard and displayed a lot of skills in the areas covered. After reading this I was furious, I felt betrayed and exploited. I feel that there was no other reason other than the lack of time put into assisting me to do my best. I feel like I could make a civil claim against the teacher, school or education department but I don't have the legal understanding. I live in Victoria, Australia. Thankyou for your time.

Answer: What exactly are you hoping to sue your teacher, school, or education department for?


Title: [USA] Dumb mistake: sent inappropriate text to CEO of some brokerage company in Taiwan

Question:
So, my campus directory gave me the phone number of a really good friend of mine (I always used FB msnger to text him) and sent a message saying, "hi fuck you" and I immediately got a call from some old guy saying that he reported my number to the police for harassment and I just stayed silent because I was so confused, then he hung up. Apparently, my friend's dad was the CEO of some company in Taiwan and his number was labeled under my friends... so now I've got a rich guy who reported me to the police.

I'm 18 and a dumbass. What repercussions could take place from here? Is there anything I can do to defend myself? Thanks.

Answer: Nothing is going to happen, he's just saying things to scare you.Answer #2: Tell your friend?


Title: [England] Bought a 3DS second-hand, found indecent child images, what do I do?

Question:
Hello all.

I'm a bit lost at the moment and don't really know what to do. So, last Tuesday, the 25th, I saw an ad for a 3DS XL on facebook marketplace with two games that was being sold for very cheap. As I've been wanting one for a while, I decided to go for it.

Messages go back and forth for a couple days and it's established that the system doesn't turn on properly. I say that's fine (for the price it was being offered at it was a bargain if it was just the two games) and go for it.

I go to their house, pick it up and then go home and charge it up, fiddle around with the battery, etc. and it still doesn't work. Then I notice that the SD  card is still inside. I put the card inside my laptop and decide to take a look and see if it had anything still on it - if so, I was going to ask if they wanted it to be returned as it wasn't mentioned in the post (and I couldn't view the files on the non-functional 3DS). I go straight to the DCIM folder and notice there are a fair few pictures on there. Some gameplay screenshots, some of which I presume are relatives and then some of a boy. Some of these are taken by the boy himself and just consist of his face and some effects I presume the 3DS allows you to add, etc.

However, then I scrolled further and saw pictures of this boy sitting on the toilet. His hands are visible and is taken from what I presume is the doorway so it must've been taken by someone else. I mean at this point it could just be a bit of innocent fun between family members - but then there are the two close-ups of his penis. I didn't take much time to look but it appears the boy is standing and non-erect, but I can tell it's him because the shirt is the same as the pictures before.

At this point I didn't know what to do. At first I tried deleting the files but for some reason they wouldn't delete - even with the SD card lock off. I told a friend who came over and then my girlfriend, the latter of which said I should at least show the police.

Then I realised that there could be even more of these indecent images on the 3DS itself as, at least with my DSi, you can save images on the system and the SD card.

I've screenshotted the facebook marketplace advertisement, our chat history (including their address) and the seller's profile. I've also blocked them in the hopes that they can't see my profile anymore. They do however know my name and obviously my face, and this worries me if I were to take any action.

My question is - what do I do now? Should I show police? I can't re-sell a 3DS with the possibility of indecent images being on it, and I can't delete these files on the SD card. I'm pretty stuck right now. I mean the photos didn't directly show any abuse but who would take those sorts of pictures of a little boy? I'd really appreciate any feedback, thank you.

**Update: Contacted the police, am handing the device in today**

Answer: I'd show the police, though what you've described doesn't necessarily equal child-porn (in the US). You should post to r/legaladviceuk


Title: My sister told me her fiancee is verbally/physically abusive to her & her children, threatening violence. (details inside)

Question:
I spoke with my sister earlier today after she sent me a worrying text message: "If anything happens to me please get a print out of texts, don't tell mom or dad. I'm deleting this." I didn't know what she meant, as I recently got a new phone and that was the first text I got from her since getting it. I called her and she was clearly crying as she answered, so I booked it over to her place to see what was going on.

She had two kids with her ex-husband (divorced ~2 years ago) and is currently engaged with a guy who has been very abusive to both her and her children. She very recently had a third child (he's the father) and he, since February, has been randomly taking the newborn, putting her in his vehicle, and driving off for hours at a time.

I also found out that he has a very bad bath salt addiction, as he is almost constantly under the influence of them. I noticed bruises on her arms when I got there and she told me he has been twisting the skin on her arm until it bruises. She also said he told her that he threw the newborn on the bed. Whether he actually did or not, neither of us know. She claims he sometimes says things like that for attention, but I'm worried it is actually happening. The kid(s) need to get checked out for physical damage ASAP.  He has been pushing the other two kids around and yelling obscenities at them.

He has been digging through her past for months now, reading 10+ year old messages on two, older phones she doesn't use. He goes through all of her text messages, e-mails, social networking accounts, etc. She showed me her phone today and he has been calling her a whore, accusing her of cheating, sapping his life from him, and more.

My sister is on the verge of suicide. I just got off the phone with my dad to let him know what is going on and we (dad and I) plan to talk to my mother when she gets home from work. I wanted to immediately go to the police station after spending some time with her earlier, but I think the right thing to do is get our parents involved first, as they're way more wise than either of us.

What steps should we be taking to get this resolved? Obviously DCFS and the police should be involved, but I don't want to give this asshole a chance to get away. Then again, I don't want to take so long that something more serious happens. He has been threatening that, if he is taken away from his kid, he will "make (her) life a living hell."

Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you.

Relevant information: my sister lives on land owned by my father. He has no claim to any property, other than his own belongings (like clothes). I am afraid that if I go to the police and they lead him away, he will come back when we're all away or at work to cause major, irreversible damage. Also, if it's relevant, we're in a rural area (I'm sure this comes as a huge surprise) and all law enforcement is at least 30 minutes away.

Location: Illinois, US
Topic:
Other Civil Matters

Answer: Police, cps, and pack up the kids and move her out of the house. Get an attorney to start the custody battle. That's about it.


Title: Read something from another sub reddit, want to check its validity

Question: I read on another sub people talking about an easy way to escape student debt is by getting your degree and applying for a work visa outside the US. Other countries supposedly would be thrilled to have a young, educated person to add to their economy and according to them you can't be extradited from the country for a student loan. Is this true? If you're willing to move to a different country, could you get a free education?

Answer: Non-legal advice: you might be shocked to know that other countries also have young educated people. Getting a work visa with nothing but a degree isn't likely. Unless you have some awesome degree in a very niche and important field, in which case getting a job & paying off your loan shouldn't be an issue.


Title: [FL] Lady driving in a bike lane hit me as I crossed an intersection through a gap left at a red light.

Question: I made an [image](http://imgur.com/wEO9A9c) of what happened. I am in Florida.  Essentially, there was a red light that backed up all lanes of traffic.  I sat at the yield sign for a little while until all of the traffic stopped moving.  All 3 lanes left a gap so that I would be able to make my left turn through the intersection, but a lady came barreling through a bike lane and hit me as she was trying to pass traffic to get to a turning lane.  I didn't see her until my airbags went off.  The lady got cited for driving in a bike lane and I got cited for failing to yield to traffic.  The officer lamented having to ticket me and heavily suggested that I should take the lady to court.  Now, I have no idea how suing the lady would work, or if it'd even be worth it (she had an old beat up 90s corolla).  In addition, my insurance agent said that I should fight my ticket.  Am I truly responsible for failing to yield to an unseen driver that is illegally driving in a bike lane? Any advice is truly welcome.

Answer: that's why you go to court, to avoid being responsible. the proper answer is maybe, you must yield to all vehicles entering the intersection, you will be arguing her law breaking negated that duty to yield.


Title: Cheating Husband

Question: Hi. I (35f) am actually sitting outside a hotel while my husband (38m) is in a room with our general manager (26f). I haven't actually caught them having sex but I'm absolutely certain they are. My question is we have an LLC for our business. We are each 50/50 owners. Can I fire her? I really want to fire her. Thanks.

Answer:
 Firing her is not going to fix your marriage. You need either hail mary marriage counseling or a divorce lawyer.

edit: You might want to delete this question and post this under an alt.


Title: My college released my information to 6,912 students. DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!

Question:
Hey,

I attend a community college in northern Virginia. I got an email from my college saying that my information along with perhaps 100 other students information was released.

Information such as name, student identification number, phone number, college email, postal mailing address, age and GPA of a number of students from across the college was mistakenly forwarded by a staff member to 6,912 students at one of the colleges locations in the area.

The college acted fast and deleted any unread emails and notified the U.S. Department of Education. But I don't know how many people actually opened the email.

The email also noted that the disclosures did not include social security numbers, birthdates, bank account numbers or other sensitive financial data.  And that there would be free credit monitoring available but this would be a resource used by the college not me (I called to ask about this).

Is there any legal action I should take? Or what I should do?

Answer:
 The school violated FERPA- the Federal Educational Rights Privacy Act- by sending out your GPA. The rest of that stuff is not protected information.

They then followed the law to resolve the situation as best as they could, and they are going further than that by offering you credit monitoring, which you have no need for because they didn't release any information that could effect your credit.

You have no damages. You have no legal action to pursue. Someone in the registrar's office made a mistake, and that sucks, but it won't hurt you.Answer #2: There's nothing to do. This mistake hasn't cost you anything. You have no legal recourse. Move on.Answer #3: Are you sure they've notified the DoE or did they just say they did? You can always file a FERPA complaint anyway just in case.

http://familypolicy.ed.gov/complaint-formAnswer #4: You have no damages so there is no legal action to take.

Although something similar happened at my college when I went to undergrad except it was a hack and the school offered credit monitoring to everyone involved. You should ask again if they are providing you credit monitoring directly.


Title: Unethical activities at work [MI]

Question:
At work I've been asked to do some (what I think are) border line unethical things.  Nothing outright illegal, but definitely things that fall under a conflict of interest (sorry, I don't want to give details).

These are things the head of the company is asking me to do, and my direct supervisor goes along with whatever he wants.  Whenever these things are asked of me, everyone involved makes a point of not mentioning the specifics in email (all emails are intentionally vague), they almost always do it by in person conversation.  I know when confronted on these things, my direct supervisor will lie about what he told me to do (i.e. it is obvious everyone is covering their asses).

My question is  - is it illegal for me to record these conversations?  I've seen the Michigan laws on this interpreted both as all party and one party consent.

Answer:
 In this situation, I’d send an email, and say, “want to make sure I have  gotten  everything right; you said to ‘a’, ‘b’, and ‘c’ and avoid ‘d’, right?

If you get the answer you expect, print a copy.  If the water is *really* deep and cold, put that copy in an envelope, seal it, mail it to yourself, keeping it unopened til you need it for your attorney.

If you get no answer, then  resend, saying “what am I to do then?”  If they meet with you telling you not to send stuff like that by email, nope right out the door.


Title: I'm an 18 year old being charged with assault for flipping off a woman's hat in a store. I'm young, stupid, and have no idea what I am doing.

Question: I have never had to go to court before in my life and have no prior criminal record of any sort. What should I expect from the trial and how should I proceed having just gotten my court summons in the mail today. How likely of a chance is there that I will be hit with felony charges. Living in Florida.

Answer:
 You plead not guilty and hire an attorney.

This is not DIY.


Title: I [21f] squished the balls of a would-be rapist [24m] years ago and now he's threatening to sue me over 'causing grievous bodily harm'

Question:
Location: Netherlands

This whole thing happened years ago. He forced himself on me when I was young, drunk and intoxicated, just as he was. The only way I was able to get away was by grabbing, squeezing and twisting his dangly bits as hard as humanly possible. Which caused him to pass out and allowed me to leave.

Fast forward many years... he contacts me. Says he has doctors papers, etcetera. Claims I caused him to become infertile and he says I should be in jail for it. I don't know what to do.

**TL;DR:** I defended myself from being almost raped by hurting a guys testicles years ago and now he claims this caused him to be infertile and I am criminally liable.

Answer:
 You should block him and carry on with your life.

First, it's very possible depending on how long it's been that both the civil and criminal statutes of limitation have run, and that any claim he might have has expired. Second, self-defence is a valid justification for the use of force nearly everywhere, including in the Netherlands, and you might avoid either a lawsuit or criminal charges on that basis.

If you are served, or if the police wish to speak with you, get advice from a local attorney. As long as this is in the realm of scary-sounding legal threats, ignore him entirely and don't engage.Answer #2: Thanks for your service to humanity.Answer #3: Sounds like you should be contacting the police about an attempted rape someone made on you and you know the perpetrators name.Answer #4: This reminds me of a UIC case in Texas a couple years back where an employee was fired for punching a coworker.  The victim refused to talk to police, so no charges were filed until he filed for unemployment compensation.  The UIC judge asked him why he was fired.  It ended...poorly...for him.

I suspect your situation would be similar.  He has no case, and if he tried to bring  a civil suit or convince a prosecutor to press criminal charges, his explanation "I tried to rape the OP and she assaulted me in self-defense" would be, legally speaking, /a really bad idea/.

Block him, move on, hire an attorney only if you're served with court papers.


Title: I'm being threatened of being hit with 'being a sex offender' when I didn't do anything

Question:
Okay, so I know how this probably looks, and most people just jump to conclusions, but please hear me out.

I'm a 20 year old male, and I live in Utah. As I'm not the best social person out there, I'm signed up to a lot of dating websites. On the 18th, I started talking with this girl, we'll name her Beth. We talked for a little bit, and then started texting, after which she wanted to message on the texting app Kik. At that point, she mentioned that she was 17. I realize that this should have been a red flag, but I didn't look at it as "adult" and "minor", I looked at it as being that she was just three years younger than me, and didn't think anything more of it.

Well, (I don't remember exact timelines, but I believe that it was later that day) she sent me a couple pictures of her in her panties and a shirt. I want to stress that I did not ask for this, she sent it out of nowhere. I didn't think too much of it, I just said that she was beautiful, and moved on.

I should also mention at this point that I have considered that they're trying to scam me, but there were points where she would send me video messages and talk, and refer to me by name, so I think she was at least a real person.

Anyways, the next day we were talking, and later that night she said that she was showering, so she sent me a video message of her in a towel, basically teasing me. So I flirted a little, saying that she wasn't being very nice, etc. Then she said "That's not nice? This isn't nice" and sent me another video of her in the shower. She covered herself with her arm, but she did send it. Again, I did not ask for any of this. But, having a moment of weakness against a pretty girl, after she got out I said that she should send me a bra picture. She said that she would send me one if I sent her a video of me pleasuring myself. I told her no, and that was that.

On the morning of the 21st, I got a message through the Kik app saying that it was her mother, and that she was going to call the cops on me. I then got a call from her brother, basically trying to figure out what was going on. I explained the situation to him, saying that I didn't ask for any of the pictures, that I didn't keep them, etc. Apparently he kept getting texted by her dad (Who was allegedly in Canada at the time), so he just called the dad and added him to the three way call. The family had shut off Beth's phone, and all of this ended with them wanting me to pay that charge, or they threatened to go to the police, and to call my job and everything. The amount was just over $400. They wanted me to send it through a MoneyGram sort of system, whatever money sending system that they have at just any Walmart. I offered to pay through PayPal, and they wanted to do that instead.

I drove to the WalMart, and as I was about to go in, I decided to call my dad and tell him what was going on, to see what he had to say. He told me not to pay them, and to come home and we would discuss it. So I went home, and we talked about it at length. The brother sent me a text saying that he had given the phone to their grandparents, and that that they were taking it to the authorities. He then called, and my dad answered and started talking to him. Beth's dad was eventually added to the call, and they had a pretty big yelling match. Neither party would budge, and they ended up saying that they were just calling the cops and hung up on my dad. We then got a call about 5 minutes later, allegedly from the Layton police department. I should mention that neither I or this family are located in Layton's jurisdiction. My dad asked for the cop's badge number, and then they hung up.

At this point, my dad recommended that I change my phone number, which I did. Him and my mom both think that they were either trying to scam me, or they're just trying to get money out of me for no reason. I have not heard from them, nor have I had police show up at my work/house, so I'd like to think that they're just going to let it go, but I wanted to make a post here just to get some advice from you guys.

TL;DR - A girl sent me pictures and videos through a texting app that I did not ask for, and now her parents threatened me to pay some money or they're going to contact the authorities, and try and get me thrown in jail for child pornography.

I also just wanted to leave an additional comment, even though it probably doesn't have any relevance. I just want to say that I'm a good person. Sure I make mistakes, but when I started talking to her, I had no ill intentions. I wasn't trying to get anything from her, I was just trying to meet someone online and see if I can develop a relationship. Any help or insight that you guys can offer would be greatly appreciated.

Answer:
 This is a scam. A very common scam -  it comes up at least once a day.

Ignore them, block them and move on


Title: I want to divorce my husband but he's the breadwinner and I have no money to leave him.

Question:
Hey. I live in California.

My husband is, to be polite, an ass. I married him three years ago, and I was manipulated (though I didn't see it as that at the time) to leave my job and stay at home to look after the house and continue making my art. He earned a very very good wage that's been able to support us both. Fast forward three years and there's absolutely no doubt in my mind I want to divorce him. The problem is that HE'S got all the money. I have no access to his bank account. get money for groceries and a very small ($50/month) allowance for personal necessities - never a "luxury" like clothes. He pays all our bills and insurances. I have absolutely no money to divorce him, and if we did try to divorce I know he'd steamroll me in court as he could afford a great lawyer and I couldn't afford any. I couldn't even afford legal advice currently. We have a little dog who is my life and my husband has said on many occasions, if I left him, he'd take my dog and I'd never see him again - a thought that kills me. I've threatened a few times that I'll take the dog when he's at work and go to my moms, but he said he'd kick my mothers door down and take the dog back. And I know he would. Of course I'd phone the police if this happened, but my mother has health problems and the sheer stress/anxiety that someone would be aggressively at her door would be traumatic for her. I don't want that to happen. But I've got nowhere else to go. I've thought about a woman shelter but I'm not being domestically abused (so it would be taking advantage of a system) and also they wouldn't take my dog too.

Just so you don't think I'm exaggerating, heres a little
-He loses his temper easily, and I'm constantly in fear when I do something wrong how he'll react. For example today I accidentally had a red sock in the washing machine with his white shirt and his shirt turned slightly pink. I immediately apologized and offered that I'd take back a dress I'd got as a birthday present the day before and with the credit, but him a shirt. He exploded in anger. Told me that was a $50 shirt that they don't sell anymore. He told me I was stupid and always make mistakes. Then then threw the shirt in my face.

-He often makes jibes about my appearance and tries to pass them off as jokes. For example, he'll say "People will think you've turned into a tramp wearing those shoes" just as I'm about to go for a family dinner then when I get upset, he'll tell me it was a joke and I need to stop taking things so personally. He'll then tell me to stop crying as I'm ruining his day

-Constantly gets drunk then shouts at me for doing things I didn't do, like spit on him.

There are jut a few snippets of what he does. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks for all your time.

Answer:
 His threats and outbursts are domestic violence.

Directory of resources for domestic violence victims in CA:
http://www.cpedv.org/domestic-violence-organizations-california

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233

Answer #2: ~~Your husband, as the breadwinner, will have to pay for your lawyer as well as his, because that's just marital assets, and you are entitled to half (usually).~~

To put it more correctly, both your lawyers come out of marital assets. Even if your husband is the only earner in the household, you are still entitled to some of those assets, usually around 50%.

Start calling around on Monday, pretty much everyone offers free consultations. The money will come from the marital 'pool'.

not legal advice: In the future, keep your power by keeping your job. Nothing can feel more powerless than not having an income (even tho your income becomes part of that pool as well). Good luck.)Answer #3: Take the dog, pack some things and go to your moms or a domestic violence shelter.Alert the local police that he has threatened to break in to your moms.


Title: [MN] Exercising Parenting Rights During a Custody Battle over Daycare

Question:
I need some more opinions on this issue IN THE NEXT COUPLE OF DAYS.

Facts:
- I am currently going through a custody battle.
- We are meeting with the custody evaluator this week.
- We separated in September 2017.
- I currently have our kids every other weekend.
- We have joint physical and legal custody -> our judge has written that we are required to share in major responsibilities like daycare.

Issue:
- My ex has signed up our youngest (of 3) into a new (separate) daycare/preschool.

Problems:
- This would be the 5th or 6th daycare that my ex has put the kids into since the separation.
- This new daycare is more than twice the cost of the old daycare but is much closer.
- My ex has continued to refuse to return our children to our church daycare/preschool -> she can't make the 15 minute drive for her 8  hour workday during their 10 hours of daycare.

Current thoughts:
- My thought is to talk with the daycare director and explain that I simply can't afford the daycare and show how many prior daycares my ex has put our kids into the last few months.
- My attorney notes to don't do anything. My attorney says this could be harassment and could impact our custody battle.
- My therapist notes to follow the advice of my attorney.
- My budget notes that I'll need to pick up another job to pay for not seeing my kids.
- Our family court judge stated in her temporary motion conclusion that we should share in life decisions for our kids like daycare.

------------------------------------------------------

My gut and budget tell me to talk to the daycare director, but my legal team is saying to stay away.

------------------------------------------------------

Thoughts??? --->>>I'm posting this to more than one sub-reddit for advice.

Answer: Maybe I’m missing something but what do you hope to accomplish talking to the daycare? I can’t see them caring how many daycares the child has already been in, nor lowering their rates for you. Answer #2: Listen to your lawyer.


Title: Highschool suspension from sports (need advice on suspension power of a principle from sports)

Question: Our senior guard on the Winslow Maine (04901)highschool basketball team was suspended indefinitely from playing sports for swearing. He has no previous in counters and no previous warning. Our principle was not even at the game and only took the word of 1 of the opponents teams parents

Answer: What makes you think a principle doesn't have the power to suspend a student from sports? If he doesn't like it, his parents can appeal to the school board or superintendant.


Title: [MO] Can police search a locked box/briefcase during a traffic stop?

Question: [Hypothetically, I am carry this case](http://i.imgur.com/rThz20t.jpg) but instead of padlocks it will be [combination locks](http://i.imgur.com/2jEJxa2.jpg), and I am pulled over. The police officer does his routine, and then asks to search the car. I tell the police officer that I'm sorry, but I don't consent to searches. He then tells me that he believes he has probable cause to search it (does the reason matter? if so let's say marijuana odor). He searches the entire car and doesn't find anything, except the locked box, and he asks for the combination but I say no (maybe tell that I don't know the combination and that it's for work?). What are his options then? Can he get destroy the locks/box to see the contents?

Answer:
 So let us hypothetically say you are trying to transport marijuana in this locked box.  Hypothetically I would respond with stop breaking the law, asshole.  Then I would go on to state that so long as the police officer can continue to establish probable cause for their actions, they can either cut the locks off the box or hold the box until they can get a warrant to open it if they want to play it safe.  At which point said hypothetical weed is visible for everyone to see and whoever possessed this hypothetical case would be arrested. Answer #2: Locked cases are a little trickier than the unlocked compartments of an automobile, and in general police will need a warrant.   If you're suspected of smuggling contraband, that won't be a difficult warrant to get.

Here's a nice readable overview of the relevant 4th Amendment caselaw [on searches of locked containers in vehicles](https://www.fletc.gov/sites/default/files/imported_files/training/programs/legal-division/downloads-articles-and-faqs/research-by-subject/4th-amendment/lockedcontainers.pdf), from the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center.


Title: (VA) Friend got caught underage drinking an in possession of a fake ID.

Question:
So basically yesterday my friend was passed out in a park somewhere and campus police found him and checked his wallet. They found his fakes and gave him an MIP (he didn't have alcohol on him he was just passed out drunk) and sent him to the hospital. How serious are his charges? He is an international student but has a US passport. He has a court date but no attorney and wants to avoid getting one because he doesn't wanna tell his parents. He is 18. Any advice?

Charlottesville area for reference.

Answer: He can't afford not to have an attorney at this point.


Title: Being bullied by an ISP, what can I do?

Question: So to start out, I live in a very rural, foresty mountain community so the only way we can get internet is satellite internet and with the mountains it’s probably the worst internet anyone had ever had (30 kps upload 25 kps download) and since this is literally the only ISP in the area that’s my only option. I buy the unlimited data package and I think that’s all of it, this is the best I’ve got. Well I found out after a couple months of this that my neighbor is getting (20 mbs upload 20 mbs download) so I call to see why I’ve gotten such awful internet in comparison and they basically told me I have to upgrade to a much more expensive internet package to not be throttled instantly (I think they said that they throttle you after 10 mbs of data) and this more unlimited unlimited package was ridiculously expensive so I couldn’t get it and I told them to forget it and I want to cancel my contract since this wasn’t what I purchased and they told me I’d have to pay a $600 cancellation fee or keep the internet for another two years. The lady on the phone kept saying “Where else are you gonna go for internet?” “I guess you’ll just have to live without internet” I just feel like this company is bullying me for my money and I’ve look at reviews for their company and pretty much everyone is saying how awful and shady their business practices are, is there anything I can do?

Answer:
 I don’t see a single illegal thing in your post. They charge you for a service and they provide it. You have the option for a better service at a higher price, but have chosen not to go with it. ISP monopolies are shady, but are what they are. You can’t get out of a contract you signed because you don’t like it.

I’m sure your contract covers the throttling. Have you read it?


Title: [IL] Purchased new home in 2015. Neighbor and I have both experienced multiple sewage backups. Neighbor had theirs fixed after a long fight. Now it's my turn to fight. Need advice.

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 The first thing I'd suggest is calling whatever attorney helped your neighbor.  He already knows the full playbook and won.

The tort immunity issue isn't as clear as you make it out to be.  The issue is if they had knowledge of the issue *at the time they caused the harm*, meaning the city had to know that they pipe was laid improperly when it was laid, not because someone else pointed it out after the fact.


Title: Miami FL, a person backed into my car and scratched the front. I took his information and pictures and he agreed to pay the damages. 30 minutes later his girlfriend calls me screaming that he isn't paying for it. What can I do?

Question:
I know, I know. We (my boyfriend and I)should have called the police. We took his information and thought that was enough. We called the police after the phone call and they told us that since we both left there scene there is little we can do now. They informed us that if there is an agreement made on site it becomes a civil matter.

We have pictures of the damage, of him in the driver's seat of a car that doesn't belong to him without a license(he told us that he didn't have one). We took his information but he didn't take ours.

It seems like this is a fairly common thing to do, just take the other person's information and charge them with the bill, I've done it before. There has to be something we can do in the case of him backing out of this verbal agreement. Any advice is appreciated.

Answer: If you have insurance, contact your insurance company and let them deal with it. Answer #2: Ignore her. Contact your insurance and let them know what happened. You have his information, which is a good thing. In the future, if you are in an accident, call the police.


Title: My house has flooded for the 3rd time in 6 years...

Question:
... and I live in Naperville, IL (Will County); and live almost half a mile from the nearest man-made lake. My house was newly built 6 years ago. It first flooded around 18 months after we moved in causing around $3000 of damage. This one wasn't too bad since the water had only seeped into the unfinished parts of our basement and we did not need to replace any of the carpet or the padding. Several other houses in our neighborhood had also flooded at the time and many people were experiencing similar damages (not too extensive, no need to replace their entire carpeting or anything). This didn't really cause too much worry to us so we didn't take any additional action other than draining out the water.

2 years later, our basement was completely flooded with nearly 5 inches of water everywhere. All the carpet was soaked, some of our valuables ruined; over $10,000 in damages. At this point, we hired plumber to re-irrigate our house to ensure that all water that comes near our house would be drained into a set of pipes and pumped into the sewage system. We also had the plumber add two more sump pumps in our basement so that the total pumping capacity is enough for a house more than triple the size of ours. We replaced all of the carpet with tile so that if it ever flooded again, we would not need to replace the floor. Our home insurance company also told us we were too much of a liability and attempted to sever future ties, unless we increased our deductible to $2,500. Though it might not have been the best decision, we went through with it. However, our minds were slightly rested since we re-irrigated and added in the new sump pumps.

They say that the 3rd time is the charm. My house flooded AGAIN. After we installed 3 sump pumps, after we re-irrigated. It somehow managed to flood again. The only explanation I could think of is that my house lies on top of a waterbed. So any time it rains too much, the water level rises under the ground and starts seeping into my house too quickly. When we built this house, on this specific lot, shouldn't it have come with a warning label of some sort? Shouldn't the builders have tested to see if there's too much water in the area to build a house. Or shouldn't the lot have at least been devalued because of this?

I'm just not sure what exactly to do, if our house continues to flood every two years, we can't continue to pay for the damages each time. We have home insurance, but even after last time they threatened to leave us. New insurance companies won't come near us either due to our high risk and liability. Not entirely sure if this was the right subreddit to post on, but I just need a little advice.

**edit: Thanks for all the advice reddit! We ended up not suing the builder/developer but just installing a commercial grade sump pump. We still plan on contacting a civil engineer to make sure the water measurements were done correctly.**

**short version:** We drained and cleaned out our basement with the help of a few friends and called a plumber to install a new sump pump.

**long version:** So what ended up happening was that the pumps had been working nonstop for several hours causing them to just stop working. This caused the water level to rise under our house and the water started leaking in through the foundation. We wanted to avoid spending 10k to fix this so we drained the water ourselves. After letting the sump pumps cool off for awhile we connected them directly to the outlet rather than through the water float system which made them continuously pump. They didn't have much life left in them but they kept on pumping until most of the water in our basement drained out. We then called a plumber to install a new sump pump to replace our broken ones. We got a commercial level .5 HP pump that can do 60 gpm at a 10 foot elevation. After draining out a majority of the water with the sump pump, we used a shop vac to get the small puddles of water left throughout the basement. We then tore off 2 feet of drywall as well as the insulation behind it. We went to a local Menards and bought around 16 fans that we used to continue drying out the basement. Once the floor was completely dried out we cleaned it with pine salt and put baking soda everywhere to get rid of the smell. Finally we sprayed everything down with bleach. At this point, we put 3 dehumidifiers in the basement and ran them until the humidity level dropped back down to around 45. It was a lot of work, but we saved 10k so totally worth. Since the labor was free and the materials added up to around 3-4k, we decided not to make a claim to our home insurance. With regards to preventing this from happening in the future, the plumber that installed the commercial grade pump ensured us that if the pump fails in the next 3 years, he'll cover both parts and labor for fixing the sump pump. At this point we still have to reinstall the drywall, but other than that we're basically done. Any advice for the future would be appreciated, but for now the situation seems to be patched up. Thanks again!

Answer:
 Get in touch with the builder/developer.  I have seen issues smaller than this turn into class action lawsuits.

If they improperly sited the development over a watershed as you suspect, you probably have a decent claim.  Each state has a statute of repose for discovering hidden defects, then a statute of limitations to pursue the other party once damage is discovered. Rules and timelines vary, so act sooner rather than later.

Answer #2: Have you talked to a professional about what can be done?  For example, can you landscape to divert the water? Or add additional waterproofing or drainage? I don't see any legal issues here.


Title: Illegal to hit niece or nephew?

Question:
Recently at a family gathering my  5 year old niece was being very bad. she was hitting everyone not listening to her authorities and being a general nuisance. after being told repeatedly (over 8 times by multiple people) to stop what she was doing, i smacked her in the face. Her mother wasnt doing anything about it so i did. i didnt hit her that hard but she definitely felt it. i should say that ive hit her before for doing things like this so this isnt a new thing. Also her mother has told me before to hit her in her stead.

i didnt think i did anything wrong but after the situation happened people started to say that legal action could be taken against me. so i just wanted to know if thats actually possible.

im in Pennsylvania.

Answer:
 What the hell are you thinking? Of course you don't have a right to strike someone's child. Do you really need someone to explain that to you?

Don't hit other people's children.


Title: [Michigan] Did acid with "friends"

Question:
I accepted an invitation from a long time friend of mine and his girlfriend to do acid with them. They assured me everything would be fine, and since it was my first time, they would guide me through it.

At some point, i blacked out, and according to them i was begging to be brought home. They had their sober roommate drive me home while i was still tripping and left me inside my apartment.

Still blacked out, i barged into my roommate's room at 5am, and he pushed me out. When he pushed me, i swung at him, so he and my girlfriend dragged me into the hallway. They told me to wait there while they called me an uber to my parent's house.

When they came back for me, i was gone. I apparently wandered outside without a coat or shoes on in 17 degree weather, and they couldn't find me. A few hours later, police and paramedics found me laying face down on the pavement. They had to take me to the hospital in an ambulance, and it wasn't until some time after 10am that i was conscious.

My question is - can i go after my so called "friends" (who have since cut off all contact with me) for medical expenses?

Answer:
 Why would your friends be liable here?

You willingly took an illegal drug, and entrusted your care to a few others who were also doing drugs.

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.


Title: Do I have to legally disclose who my child's father is?

Question:
So I have an autistic son and I have the opportunity to take him to Mexico and get him and his sister an amazing education. I'm currently pregnant with my third child. And I am planning on moving to Mexico to pursue my children's education as soon as I am able to travel. I have full custody of my first 2 children and can travel freely with them. My youngest child's father is trying to use my past as an excuse to remove my child from me and refuses to let me travel with my child so I can pursue my children's educational needs. I am sober and haven't gotten into legal trouble since my last CPS case. He has also threatened me with removing my child if I date another man and if I get married he will remove him from my custody. The father hasn't been involved in my pregnancy hasn't even seen me since I've gotten pregnant and is actually in a new relationship which if his logic is correct that's enough reason for me to remove my child from him since he is in a relationship and is threatening me with the same thing. He is a drug addict and an alcoholic who is basically the reason I relapsed after almost 15 years sober. So basically do I have to let him sign the birth certificate since he is just trying to make my life hell?
Topic:
Custody Divorce and Family

Answer:
 If the child is not yet born, you are free to travel and/or move to wherever you would like without his consent. Once the child is born, he may petition the court to prove paternity and  you will not be able to stop that. He will need to file where you and the child have established residency.Answer #2: Sorry, why do you want to move to Mexico? Do you have a job lined up there? Who will you and your kids be living with, a boyfriend or what? Can you legally live and work in Mexico? Can your autistic son legally go to school there?

Re: your unborn child, you don't have to let the father sign the birth certificate, you can claim the father is unknown. But he can later legally demand paternity testing and have the birth certificate corrected.

Are you sure that you're allowed to take your older two children to Mexico? Do they have passports? Do they require their father's permission to take them out of the country? Many countries will require proof from the other parent when they see a child at the border.

You have a lot of legal issues here in addition to the title of your post. Are you in counseling?


Title: I got a raise 5 years ago. I didn't report it. Will I owe that money back to my child's mother? I'm in Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Question:
I have been child support for 7 years.  We have joint custody, she has primary placement, and I have alternate placement.

5 years ago I got a raise but didn't report it. Since 5 years ago, I now have my son overnight 1 to 3 nights per week, depending on his mothers work schedule.  Will I still owe her the difference if we go to court to adjust the placement?  She is a waitress and bartender, so she can make it look like she makes next to nothing. (Side note, she has bragged to me that she "pulls in over 60K under the table" via text message.)

Some side info, we were both ordered to provide health insurance, but our child's health insurance has always been provided by me, and it's not cheap!  Will this matter?

I'm not against paying child support.  She does have him more than me.  I just don't want to dig myself into a massive financial hole.  I'm just not sure what is fair in this situation, and how the courts will react.

Answer: Child support adjustments are not automatic in Wisconsin, one of the parties has to file a motion to amend the order.  Simply getting a raise, unless it was enough to substantially alter your circumstances, does not rise to the level of mandating an adjustment.


Title: Custodial parents sent notice that she is to be notified before I, the non custodial parent takes his kids from the school

Question:
Edit: Title should read Custodial parent, not parent(s).

Louisiana.

We have joint legal custody. I filed a motion to modify custody. Her attorney then sent a notice to the school requesting that custodial be notified before I or my designee checks out or picks up kids from school. My attorney sent a notice to the school stating that we have joint legal custody and she has no right to do this. The school's attorney says they will abide by custodial's  attorney's request because my attorney can't site any kind of legal presidence on my behalf.  Can reddit find anything to help me out?

Answer: Depends what they mean by notify. If its just a notification, I don't think you have any precedence. If the notification requires the mom to consent, then I think you have something. A parent has the right to request a notification of the location of their child which is what they are asking. I don't think your school would be forced to do this, but as a courtesy, I don't know of any law that forbids them.


Title: Broke up with my live-in Boyfriend, can't get him to leave (VA)

Question: My friend is using my account for this as she is not a redditor (yet). I broke up with my ex-boyfriend, gave him 30 days to leave the apartment. His name is not on the lease, and I have full support from the landlord. At this point he has 12 days left according to the written notice I gave him. Is there anything that I can do to speed up the process or make myself more safe, both physically and legally? I have asked him not to get into my bed, but when I wake up he is sometimes in my bed. He has not done any packing and he is still behaving like we're together. His mom lives 2.5 hours away and has space for him, so it's not like I'm throwing him out on the street. He has the capability to transfer his job over there but refuses to take the steps necessary. Thanks!

Answer:
 the easiest way to speed things is to pay him however much it takes to get him to leave.

if you've agreed about a sleeping arrangement, put a lock on the door. if he threatens or assaults you call the police and get a TRO. Answer #2: Not really. You could try contacting his mom if you haven't already


Title: Someone in charge of my horse's care indirectly caused it to be injured and I want to know if there's some way to get them to pay for the vet bill

Question:
Just over a week ago my horse had its usual "shoe change" - basically a farrier (horse shoe-er) comes out to remove the old shoes and apply new ones. This is done using nails and is usually problem-free.

Sometime during the next 12 hours, after the farrier had left, my horse stepped on a farrier's nail. This can be a career/life-threatening injury, but thankfully this wasn't the case this time. However, treating the problem has already cost upwards of $1000 in vet bills and my horse will be unable to be ridden for 6+ months (which indirectly costs me more as I usually have her split-leased with another rider who helps care for her and cover monthly boarding costs).

I'm wondering if there's any way I can arrange for the farrier to cover payment for at least the vet bills. I've checked already and he doesn't have any kind of insurance to cover something like this, so it wouldn't be as straightforward as filling out a claim.

This all happened in NC. Thanks for any help!
Topic:
Other Civil Matters

Answer:
 Legal advice: possibly yes, as /u/dirvine_r says.

Horseperson advice: no, $1k isn't a lot in terms of animals that are constantly hell-bent on disaster, and it's just not worth risking the wrath of farriers. Shoeing is a seller's market, and suing for a common "shit happens" thing that most horsepeople just accept is not worth the risk to your reputation in a small, clique-ish community. I have seen people kicked out of barns for less.

I do wonder how you know that it was a farrier's nail, and one from this shoeing--did someone witness it? Do you still have the nail?Answer #2: You can sue the farrier in small claims court for your economic losses (bills plus lost rent) if he was negligent in leaving extra nails lying about.

Before doing that though, have you approached the farrier informally to let him know of the issue?Answer #3: How much is your horse worth? He won't be on the hook for more than that, even if vet cost exceeds that sum.

As /u/plugmefulloholes mentions, while you may be able to recover some of the cost, this would likely have unwelcome consequences regarding the continued availability of farrier services for your horse.


Title: Help me reddit

Question: Ok so I'm in trouble back in 2004 or 2005 I had huge credit card debt then I lost my job got kicked out of my house and end up living at my aunt's house. Then I went to college got my degree and a internship at a good companie. Now I'm working and just started to get thing together I have a condo and applying for a loan for a house thay said my credit score was good. Yesterday I got a letter in the mail saying discover just issue a subpoena for my information from the company I'm getting the loan from...  don't credit card debt fall of after 7 years and why now it's been 10 years please help

Answer: Fall off your credit score yes, but debt doesn't just magically disappear. They can still pursue you to pay it. And depending on the details and location they might still be able to sue you if they already haven't.


Title: Downstairs neighbours have been keeping my family up for multiple nights with arguments and domestic abuse. Landlord refuses to kick them out, and is threatening to sell the house instead.

Question:
Our downstairs neighbours are two older women. One of them is physically abusive to the other, however the woman is too scared to press charges against her roommate because she is worried she will be put in a shelter. Last night, they got into an argument that woke us up around 3am and lasted until 4am after we told them to be quiet. During this argument, we could hear the abuser hitting and throwing things at the other woman, and the other woman telling her to stop.

My older brother (25) and mother talked to the police. They were told that there was nothing they (the police) could do unless the woman being abused agrees to testify or press charges, and there’s nothing we can do unless we find out that the woman beat her to death.

My mother has talked to our landlord multiple times about our neighbours — over the course of the last few months, which is how long these arguments have been happening — and he hasn’t done anything about it. She has spoken to him on the phone today telling him that the next time it happens, he will make sure that he and the police will be at the house. His response was that he’d much rather sell the house than deal with making our neighbours leave.

Is there anything we can do to prevent ourselves  from having to move, and to get our landlord to evict our neighbours? Is there anything inside of Ontario resident law such as the Residential Tenancies Act or any other similar acts that we can use to our advantage/to protect ourselves?
Topic:
Canada

Answer:
 When you hear violence happening, you call the police. If the cops show up in the middle of a fight there's a decent chance someone is going to jail.Answer #2: Call 911 each time you hear it, and make statements. The police do not need a victim’s consent to press charges if they believe they have enough evidence to present to a prosecutor. Call them every time you hear it happening.

You could also call Adult Protective Services with your concerns.

As for your landlord not taking action regarding the disturbances to your quiet enjoyment / the nuisance (or whatever the wording is in your state), you have the option of putting your complaints to them in writing with the details each time it happens, and following the grievance process available to tenants in your state.


Title: Dealership won't let my great-grandparents return the car my great-grandfather with dementia purchased (FL)

Question: Long story short, my great-grandfather, who has dementia and can't make decisions on his own, was at a dealership with my uncle and his girlfriend. My uncle and his girlfriend left him there, and a while later he shows up at his wife's house with a delivery man. Turns out he decided to get rid of one of his cars, roll over the payments on another he owns, and purchased, for 22,000 dollars, a brand new car. The dealership refuses to do anything about it, even after being informed he can't make decisions. What actions can they take to solve this problem?

Answer:
 Have you shown the dealership any medical paperwork?  Right now they probably think it is buyer's remorse.

I can't speak to the legal side, but my dad has dementia and it is a motherfucker^112.  Good luck and enjoy what time is remaining.

Answer #2: Your uncle and his girlfriend would probably be key witnesses in any legal proceeding. The question might be asked "Why did you drop him off at a car dealership, presumably with cash, credit cards, or his check book, if the family is so offended by the idea of him buying a new car?"Answer #3: Unless there is medical and court papers showing he is unfit to manage his own money enjoy the new car.Answer #4: Who leaves an elderly man with dimension at a car dealership?

Your Uncle just got a new car.


Title: Company in MO gives away promotions to people without interviewing any other candidates.

Question:
So I work for a medium sized manufacturing company (about 200 employees) in MO. Recently management filled positions without posting them to be bid or interview. These positions come with about a $10k/year raise.

The precedent for the last several years that I have worked here was to post jobs for internal candidates to bid on and then to interview people who were qualified. There's definitely not a lack of qualified candidates because these promotions are just a 1 tier elevation. It's pretty hardcore favoritism, to be frank.

I'm sure that the argument could be made that this is due to discrimination, but I'm not so sure how solid that would be. Both are middle aged men, one white, one Hispanic.

My question is; is that legal? I can't believe that HR signed off on something like this.

Answer:
 Unless it's government, there's generally no legal requirements about how companies decide to promote and recruit, as long as they don't violate anti-discrimination laws.  They aren't required to do a competitive process if they don't want to.

>I'm sure that the argument could be made that this is due to discrimination, but I'm not so sure how solid that would be. Both are middle aged men, one white, one Hispanic.

Based on a sample size of two, there's no argument at all, really.  If you had 50 promotions that were all men, and there were an equal number of qualified women, you might have something. With two?  You have... coincidence, not evidence.


Title: California - paid family leave / baby bonding time for dad.

Question:
cross posted to daddit.

My boyfriend works for a company and has already informed them of our impending arrival (estimated due date this Sunday). They’ve given him the all clear to leave work if necessary when I am hospitalized. What’s weird about the situation to me is that he called me after his shift today frazzled that they’re already asking him when he is going to be taking his baby bonding time.

I was under the impression that dads couldn’t take the bonding time until after birth (I’m already on week 3 of no work so I’m currently on disability and will be switched over to bonding after birth).  It seems kind of wrong/annoying that they’re already expecting him to say what dates he’s going to want for bonding when we don’t know if baby is 2 days away or 5+ days away. Is this normal? Or are they just being weird?

It’s our first child and apparently his HR persons first time at the rodeo (besides giving him some pamphlets she hasn’t been very helpful..). He doesn’t have a lot of sick time accrued (2 days paid sick, 3 days unpaid time off) so we’re kinda hoping that baby will cooperate and arrive on his days off this weekend so then he can go sick/use that UPTO and have those days be notice for his bonding time to start —-but you know life is never that simple.

So  how does it work for new arrivals? (I think if he splits the time say 2 weeks now 2 later within the 12 month period he has to give 2 weeks notice for the later dates - we’re fine with that - just how are we supposed to predict our birth?!)

Any advice is appreciated. Thanks!!

Answer: It sounds like maybe they're just a bit clueless. Lots of women have inductions or scheduled sections, so perhaps they think that you do have a firm date.


Title: [AZ] Employer threatening employees who fail to work mandatory overtime with automatic unexcused absences. Can they do this?

Question:
The manager sent out a mass email to everyone in the department this week saying they have to work a minimum amount of hours of overtime *this same week*, and if they don't, it automatically counts as unexcused, basically equivalent to a no-call no-show.

They claim that the law 'doesn't apply' to these required overtime hours. Basically, that you can't use sick time, FMLA, etc.

Answer: Employers can require employees to work overtime with no notice, yes. Although the employer cannot discipline for properly taken legally protected leave. Arizona doesn't have protected sick leave. In most cases, fmla can't be used last minute.


Title: Sexual Harassment Claim at Work. How can I protect myself? What are my rights?

Question:
A woman I work with accused me of sexual harassment. My first in my 10 year work history. It is completely false and I have some proof of that. We both work in a correctional institution and there are video cameras and recording devices everywhere.

I have proof of phone calls made to me by my accuser asking her to come talk to her. Videos of me telling my accuser to stay away and me shutting a door on her. I also have video of her following me outside and allowing me in her car when we were on a friendship basis. She also stated during a meeting she and I had with a supervisor that she liked working with me.

I know I'm innocent, but certain jobs within the government arena require me to disclose if I was ever accused of sexual harassment. I'm also working towards becoming a male nurse, which also hurts my employment chances. What are my rights in this case? I have counter claimed that she has sexually harassed me by calling me a cocksucker and gay. She has support of a coworker and I am worried that this is on a he-said/ she-said basis. I have potential witnesses for my side as well. I believe this claim is in retaliation for me reporting her committing a major violation of policy.

I work and live in Columbus, Ohio

Answer: Start documenting every interaction.  Avoid being around her if possible.  If you are formally accused of anything, don't answer any questions without a lawyer.


Title: Seeking Advice - My Neighbor is Angry About Where I'm Parking

Question:
I'll try not to make this terribly long.

**Stuff that's happening:**

I live in California in the Bay Area and rent an in-law apartment on the lower level of a home.  My landlords have 3 cars and a motorcycle between them, so I park on the street.   One side of the driveway is right in front of a stop sign and at the top of a hill.  It's not super well lit, so I don't love parking there.   On the other side, the street is partially in front of my house and partially in front of my neighbor's house.   My landlord had a plug installed for my hybrid on that side, and all was great for a while.

About 6 months or so ago, the neighbor, we'll call him Passive Aggressive - came to me and told me that I had to move my car and wasn't allowed to park there anymore because he had a nanny now and needed the space.  There's plenty of space for two cars and I politely pointed out that there had been more than one car parked there in the past.   He then told me that he has to come out of his drive at an angle (he can't get his low car out of his steep driveway) and needs it backed up.  Okay, fine.  After some negotiations and talking to the people who own my house, we compromised and I backed my car up so it was further back and impeding our driveway a bit.

Passive Aggressive has since then not spoken to myself or my landlords, making a big deal out of this and taking every opportunity to park as far back as he can, having his nanny back up when I'm gone or having his friends park all the way back.  Whatever he can do to keep me out of that space.  It's annoying, but it's a public street, so I just find somewhere to park until I can move my car later.

This last weekend, as I drove up to the house and pulled up, Passive Aggressive comes up his driveway yelling at me to move my car.   He then informed me that I was "encroaching on his property" and pointed out the property line, and said that he would have my car towed if I continue to park in that spot.   I politely informed him that his property line didn't extend to the street - at which point he got pretty aggressive about it.   I walked away, but the more I thought about it it was pretty irritating.

In a last ditch attempt to solve things, I went to him and offered to have the police come and solve this for us.  Let's have law enforcement tell me where I can and can't park, shall we?  Which is when he went into a litany of reasons of why I was a terrible neighbor.  Needless to say they were all because my car was in front of his house and no other.   Knowing that nothing would be solved, I told him that I felt being neighborly went two ways, thanked him for his time and left.

I know this guy isn't going to let this go.  I've bought a dashcam, since I worry about him doing something.  Parking in front of that stop sign isn't really an option here unless I don't want a rear-end on my car.  Are there any other steps I should be taking?

**I failed - TL;DR**

Angry neighbor doesn't want my car in front of his house on a public street.  It's CA, and I don't have a whole lot of other options, so he's going to have to live.... bought a dashcam, anything else I can do if he's continually aggressive about this?

Answer: You probably ought to ask the police to  come out and talk to him so he is warned to discourage further harassment. If he has your car illegally towed, you can sue him in small claims for damages and get a restraining order against him. You should also take copious pictures to document how and where your car is parked so you have evidence in case things worsen.


Title: My wife got pregnant a few months after we signed our lease for our new apartment. We live beneath a smoker and we are worried the second hand smoke will affect the baby. Is it possible to have the landlord move us to another unit to solve the problem? Any advice would be helpful! Thanks!

Answer:
 In general (USA), the landlord does not have an obligation to move you at no charge.

Practically speaking, landlords are people.  Talk to them and see if you can work out a deal.  The landlord may have a warm heart and let you move for free.  I would not expect that, and I would expect to have to pay a lease break fee and sign a new lease.  Good luck!


Title: A bizarre request from a client. Not sure of the legal implication.

Question:
I do freelance photography and had a friend send a potential client my way. The client and I talk shop and we agree on a price. Then they ask me for an email and want a "favor". I ask what the favor is and they ask for me email again. Okay no harm in an email correspondence. Then they send me this strange email.

"I'm ready to make payments now with my credit card in full right now Am presently recuperating from the diagnosis of lung Cancer I would have love to call you but i am an hearing impaired that is why i am doing this via text so that you can still handle this for me.

Okay sound good , I want you to know that the event planner that will handle the event does not have facility to bill credit cards right now. In view of this i want you to add an extra $200 as gratuity for yourself and for a favor i am asking of you. The favor is that i want you to add $2,950 for the event planner that will handle the event.  As soon as you charge my credit through, $2,950 will be deposited for their services as soon as payment clears your account please.   Be rest assured you will be charging everything on my credit card including the 3% cc charges. Below is the final break down of the total charges i will be authorizing you to charge on my credit card"
Your Service Fee: $275
Event planner fee, to be deposited in their bank acct: $2950
Tips : $200
CC charges : 3%

This email is a direct copy paste if what they sent me. Am I right in thinking this is some scam or attempt at some sketchy stuff or am I misunderstanding? (In California if that makes any difference)

Answer: Yes, it's a scam.  If you do this, you'll be out the $2950 you send to the "event planner"


Title: Job is asking for very personal info.

Question: So I got a job at a casino and need to get a gaming license. It’s asking for all my family members names, dob, addresses, and employers. Can I opt out because there are some I don’t even know where they live.

Answer: All you can do is answer to the best of your ability. A gaming license is no joke and they need to check if anyone close to you has a bad history that can compromise you.Answer #2: You can refuse to provide the information. They can refuse to hire you. If a gaming license is required for your job then this is what you need to do.


Title: What are some smart and fair things a man can put into a prenuptial agreement?

Question: I'm genuinely curious about what measures a man can take to defend himself from the common negative outcomes of a divorce.

Answer:
 State and situation specific.

Contrary to your assumption, there’s no gender biased treatment of assets in divorce court.


Title: Ex husband is blackmailing me into giving him full custody of our child, he also has broken into my online accounts (google, facebook, instagram) and has copied messages from there

Question:
Long story short my ex and I have been separated, with divorce papers filed for about 8 months now. Our child primarily stays with him mainly due to my work schedule, where it's easier for him to pick him up from aftercare since it is closer to his job. My ex has on several occasions prevented me from seeing my child, he has blocked me from calling him, and also had him stay with a family member when he was supposed to drop him off at my house and did not tell me where he was. My ex also routinely breaks into my online accounts, copies my text messages and other messages and harasses me about things that I've said to others, even preventing me from seeing my son due to things that he didn't like that are none of his business. We have no formal agreement, and my ex is verbally and emotionally abusive.   Initially we had an arrangement but since he is so bitter about the divorce, he is using my child in his sick game to get back at me. He has told me he wants me "to be gone" and he wants to me "leave him and our child alone" all based off of things he would read from my online accounts, that more or less show him I'm having a life and he hates no longer having that control over me. I am tempted to go to the police to report what he has done in regards to my online accounts, as he had downloaded private conversations and has admitted as much. As far as the blackmail, he has told me that unless i sign over full custody he will continue to harass and spy on me, and people that I associate with until I do what he wants. As of right now I have not been able to get back in contact with him. I drove by his house and he has not been there, and I do not know where my child is. He does not answer my calls or any other means that I would communicate with him.

I am going to be inquiring about a PFA, if only to keep him away from my house, and then get a lawyer to see about custody. Is there anything else that I can do in the interim to deal with this? I've been so stressed out about it and I dont know where else to turn.

Also this is taking place in PA and DE

Answer:
 Good grief.  Get a lawyer, get a custody order, and for the love of God, CHANGE YOUR PASSWORDS.  If you can't, get new accounts.  If that doesn't work, get someone to scan your devices for spyware/viruses etc.  And stop talking to and listening to him.

There are no victims here, only volunteers.  He only has power if you let him have power.  There is nothing you've said that indicates a court would not allow shared custody here.


Title: Can my girlfriend sue for defamation? (NH)

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 You have described nothing here that I would see as defamation.

And, I suspect that the comments that are being passed about this girl by the camp employees are being blunted.

When I hear "another camp employee complimented the camper's shirt or something" in front of the mom...  Just following these accusations (which are vague), I am imagining snarking comments of "NIIICE Shirt" followed by giggling.

Under those circumstances, I would hope the camp would take action against the employees.

But... no... I wasn't there...  And you weren't either.

If your girlfriend gets fired, and decides to file a lawsuit, expect a lot of discovery about what actually happened, and testamony as to the mother and her daughters perspective.

I would expect variances from your girlfriends point of view.


Title: I'm being held responsible for a hospital bill from a doctor that I had no choice in being seen by, and who was also not contracted with my insurance plan, even though the hospital was.

Question:
Location: Kyle, TX

So basically, in May of this year I had to go to the emergency room. But before we went, I had my boyfriend call them and make sure the hospital was in network with my insurance because I was on the most inexpensive plan Obamacare has to offer and my choices were always limited. When he called and gave them my info, they told him that they did in fact accept my insurance. So we went.

A few months later I get a bill for $938.98 from the doctor I was seen by. I called the hospital who told me to call my insurance company, which I did. My insurance company told me I should only owe a $100 emergency room copay, which they ended up sending me a bill for also. So now I owe $1,038.98.

My insurance company tells me I have the option to file a formal complaint, so I do, and they basically take 30 days just to tell me that they don't owe any more payment on the doctor bill since she was an out of network doctor. Which I understand, but again, I literally just sat in a room and was pretty much handed a doctor to be responsible for my care that night. So I'm like wtf. So I take it a step further and decide to take out a complaint on the hospital because if they've done this to me, there's no telling how many other people they might have done (or are currently doing) this to. I also feel like I shouldn't be responsible for this bill because I didn't have a choice in what doctor I'd seen. I assumed since she worked at the hospital that she would be in network by default. You don't think to ask these questions when you're in so much pain you can't even walk.

I'm still waiting to hear back, but do I have a case here at all? I don't plan on having to seek a lawyer or anything unless I absolutely have to, but is this one of those situations where I'm just SOL? I already had to make a payment once in order to keep my account active--I'm scared they'll send this bill to collections and it'll start affecting my credit negatively.

For quick background about me: I'm 20yo and I work part-time so this bill is pretty big for me.

Answer:
 Welcome to the world of medical insurance in America.

It sucks, but it's entirely legal and you now owe that money.


Title: Mentally handicapped coworker sexually assaulted on company property, HR won’t step in

Question:
I work with a woman who has Down’s syndrome. A few weeks ago she told me and a small group of women that one of our male coworkers has been sexually fondling and kissing her after hours, and that it has been happening for over a year. This adds up with strange things we have seen between them in the past, and one of our coworkers has actually witnessed him grab and hold her. We have also heard her yelling “no!” from his work area. We filed an HR report, wrote statements, and were interviewed by someone from corporate.

Yesterday we were individually pulled aside by corporate HR and “updated”. We were told that the accused man has been offered English language lessons (“no” is also “no” in his native language) and that he has been given “a talk”. The disabled victim is still required to work overlapping shifts with this man and her jobs requires they interact. I argued with the woman about this and was told that our eyewitness statements didn’t imply anything worthy of action (this woman has been touched on the breasts, butt, and thighs and kissed on the mouth. She has been left alone with this man after hours on a regular basis). I believe she was discredited on the basis of her mental condition.

Our coworker has no power of attorney, so I am told that we cannot inform her family or call the police on her behalf— she must do it, but at this point says she is afraid to. I and a large group of female coworkers are still forced to work with this man, and now know that HR does not take action against sexual harassment. They told us they will “look into it” if he assaults someone else.

I was given the name of a different corporate contact, however I was also told that the case was closed and I may be putting my job at risk by going above the HR woman’s head. I was told that my job may already be at risk because I challenged her decision. I live in Arizona and want to know what else can be done, because no one is advocating for this woman and she is now under the impression that she is in trouble for reporting him.
Topic:
Employment Law

Answer: Anyone can report a crime that they have observed.  HR is looking out for the company (they may not be doing it well but that is who HR cares about).  If you have observed a crime you can tell whoever you want, that includes the victims family and he cops.  The company might be able to retaliate against you, but there is no legal requirement for the victim to be the one to make the report.  The case might not go anywhere without the victims support, but again, they don’t have to make the initial report.


Title: Sexual Harassment and Retaliation at big box retailer, what to do next? -Maryland

Question: I've been at my job at one of the most popular big box retail stores for 8 years. I have experienced sexual harassment and harassment since I started working there and it is the culture of the store in every department. last October I reported an incident of sexual harassment to corporate and informed them in the later months of the retaliation I was experiencing from my co-workers and department manager due to my report. They did not handle the situation to my satisfaction. I was told I might be too sensitive and should expect that these kinds of things happen from my store manager.   I have reported the incident to the EEOC, but the wait time is 6 months in my state. I have talked to a lawyer and he said because a manager was involved he could get me a few months severance pay. I had planned to stay with this company for a long time and was getting a good salary that I don't want to give up, but I don't want to go back to the same environment working with the people who harassed me. I feel like I should be entitled to more than just a few months severance pay or the manager or employee should be demoted or fired. Currently, my therapist has me out on FMLA because the retaliation would not stop. I have no income and have applied for disability. I have also contacted my local Union and found out they had already known about the case and the vice president of the company became involved. The union did not contact me about the situation and I'm having a hard time getting details about what the union knows and what their conclusion was. I have a letter from corporate asking me to keep the situation confidential. I have been reaching out for help on what to do in this situation and feel like I've hit a wall, any advice would be great. Sorry for any mistakes in posting this is my first post to Reddit.

Answer: Nobody here can give better advice than an attorney you've already spoken to and given all of the facts to.  If that's the most he thinks the case is realistically worth, then there's probably good reason for that.  If you're unsatisfied with the consultation, speak with another attorney for a 2nd opinion.  But there's no magic way to make a case "worth" more.Answer #2: Especially once unions, EEOC and contracts get involved, it becomes too fact specific for the internet. You've really got to reach out to the people in the know here.


Title: CO/CA - UPS destroyed every box I shipped with them & the contents inside and will not take responsibility. Do I have any options?

Question:
Hi there,

I shipped five boxes through UPS from Colorado to California and all of them were damaged in transit. Many items inside the boxes were damaged to the point of destruction, including a television, a gaming console, two kitchen appliances, and loads of fragile kitchen items. All of these products were individually wrapped in bubble wrap, then in paper, then in towels. All fragile items were placed two inches from the edges of the box, and all boxes were reinforced on every edge with packing tape. These are the guidelines according to the International Safe Transit Association (ISTA) that UPS uses to determine if damage claims are valid. I did NOT insure the packages, which was my error entirely, and I am kicking myself for it, but I figure even without insurance, there would be some expectation of quality. I have photos of all of the damaged boxes as well as all of the damaged products. In total I spent $262 to ship all five boxes, and in total I lost about $600 worth of items to damages.

I submitted a damage claim with UPS last Wednesday and today received notice that all five claims were denied due to my packaging not being compliant with ISTA standards. I know this is not the case because I know what those standards are. I have appealed the decision, but have been told it will likely still be denied for that reason. I have been told that the boxes were not strong enough to support the package weight and that I should have been told that, but alas, I was not told that. If I had been, I would have had no problem getting new boxes. But I do find it hard to believe brand new standard moving boxes are not suitable boxes for moving. Each box had a 32 lb. per inch edge crush test, which means the maximum load per box is 40 pounds. All of my boxes weighed less than 40 pounds, and I was still told this is the reason why my claim was denied.

Do I have any grounds to do anything here? Or is the fact that I neglected to insure my boxes where this situation ends? Thanks for any help I can get.

Answer:
 Basically their argument will always be it wasn't packaged correctly. And their evidence is the fact it was damaged unless it got run over by a truck.  It needs to be packaged to survive transit.

And since you didn't declare a value, the max amount is $100 per shipment


Title: CPA says my father-in-law agreed to pay him $10,000.00 to amend his 2016 tax returns.

Question: My wife’s father passed away unexpectedly at the beginning of this year.  Before he passed, he told my wife that he was waiting for a large check from the IRS.  Evidently he had this guy resubmit/amend his 2016 tax return.  He never mentioned this large payout to the CPA to my wife.  My wife asked theCPA about the expected return as it should have arrived by then.  (The check didn’t arrive and got held up by the IRS due to his passing.)  The CPA told her that ,yes,he had resubmitted/amend his 2016 taxes and that her father promised/agreed to give him $10,000.00 of the return.  We have no evidence of this agreement. It’s just what the CPA says.  I can’t imagine this is legit. Advice?

Answer: He should easily be able to produce the retainer agreement or some evidence of your FIL’s agreement. Invoice, emails, etc.


Title: Regarding my Step Daughter

Question: I have three kids currently. A 6 year old son from a prior relationship that currently lives in Utah and share joint custody with. A 7 year old step daughter that my current girlfriend had from a prior relationship. A son recently born with my current girlfriend. My step daughter is aware that her biological father is not involved and never wanted to be involved from the beginning. She has been surrounded all her life by people that love her so she wants for nothing. The legal agreement my girlfriend has with the B.F (Biological Father) is that he pays child support, he’s only paid for the last year recently, and that its joint custody even though he wants nothing to do with her. This is how the Child support office in Texas setup the paperwork. We currently live in another state and have kept the child support office updated on our address. We never thought that he would want to be involved until he texted her demanding that he see her and spend time with her. He has asked for pictures in the past and we have sent 2-3 pics before. We’ve spoken to our daughter about this and she has stated that I am her dad and that she wants nothing to do with the B.F. We decided to tell her because we don’t want her to feel later on that we kept anything from her. The B.F is currently not listed on the birth certificate but is also unwilling to relinquish his rights. We’ve threatened to take him to court for back pay on the child support as he evaded the courts for years prior. I am not legally married to my GF yet and want to know if I could legally adopt her or what can I do to prevent him from disrupting her life. She is afraid of leaving our home with a stranger that she doesn’t know and unfortunately the court documents state that he can have her for the weekends and time during the summer.

Answer:
 You cannot adopt her if you are not married.

And if there is joint custody then he still has every right to enforce the court order.

She can go to court to modify the court order but if he wants visitation he is likely to get it.


Title: Fired after 1 week in exempt admin/manager position, I'm certain it's due to me calling out their illegal labor/payroll practices - LA County, California

Question:
This is a throwaway account, all names are changed, and some identifying details will be blurred/vague. This is long because the details are fresh in my head and I wanted to get them all down ASAP.

My background - I have 10+ years in numbers/analysis heavy corporate experience. Last year, I quit the industry I was in - tired of working for corporations and for an industry that doesn't mesh well with my own ideals and morals.

A few weeks ago I was hired as the office manager in charge of sales reports, EOM reporting, invoicing, billing, HR, payroll, etc, at a small business owned by "Jenny" who runs a few stores here in California and on the East Coast. Very high end luxury hard goods.

The position I was filling was vacated hastily by the previous employee "Jessie" and the owner brought in her friend "Brianna" to be trained for only 5 days by Jessie before she left the company. Brianna's position is unclear to me, I guess she was meant to be an interim fill-in but it seems she might continue to stay on in another role, consulting or whatever. She's some sort of life coach or something.... she has 20 years experience in a specific niche apparel field (all at the same company) and she thinks she knows everything about how businesses are run. From the get-go it was apparent to me that she.... doesn't.

My date of hire/first day on the job was October 13th. In the 7 business days between then and now, as I've been trained by Brianna, I've caught numerous mistakes, including: invoices never sent to our bookkeeper for payment, missing checks, incorrect commission calculations resulting in overpayment, city permits filed incorrectly, late tax payment penalties, and the biggest one of all - highly illegal payroll practices. Last Friday (October 20) as I was being trained by Brianna on how we calculate and submit payroll, as we had one employee's hours pulled up on our system, I asked if we're okay with this much overtime because I noticed the employee had worked more than 8 hours a day nearly every day for the 2 weeks we had pulled up on the screen. Brianna replied, "We don't pay overtime." I said that that's impossible, by law we have to pay overtime if an employee works over 8 hours a day or over 40 hours in a 1-week pay period. I was told "It's written in our employee handbook that we don't pay overtime." I had read the entire employee handbook on my first day and it definitely doesn't say that (I confirmed again, the handbook states that we follow California's labor laws/practices regarding overtime. The handbook doesn't mention the East Coast state where we also operate.)  I tried for another minute or two to push the subject about how California law requires time and a half for any hours worked over 8 and and under 12, and after 12 hours in a day it's double time... etc. Brianna was rolling her eyes and sighing so I dropped it, making a mental note to ask the owner when I got a chance.

As we continued training, I realized that this company doesn't submit payroll hours to their payroll processor at the day level, only at the 2-week pay period level. So for example they literally say person XYZ worked 65 hours for Oct 1 - 15. Obviously, this wouldn't catch/account for any overtime worked in a single day, and it wouldn't catch any overtime worked in a single week.... I'm sure you can understand how this might be an issue.  I had the chance later that day to ask one of our store managers if she sees overtime on her check and exactly how they told her it's calculated. She said that she was told that if they work more than 80 hours in the 2-week pay period, they're paid overtime for those hours. Again... you can see how this is an issue.

I was still giving them the benefit of the doubt in my head, and made a note in my notebook to talk to the owner Jenny ASAP and maybe get things cleared up. Maybe Jessie hadn't trained Brianna properly, I don't know.

Another note - Since I've been working on invoicing and billing, I've had access to Brianna's work email in order to ease into the role, reply to vendors and our bookkeeper and whatnot. In her inbox today I saw an email Jenny sent to their payroll processing company on Friday (after I had that training session with Brianna) about needing to talk to someone about payroll legality questions, hours, etc. Jenny copied Brianna on the email so it was right there in her inbox when I came in.

A few hours later the owner comes in and tells me I'm not a good fit for the company and she's letting me go. I asked why, and she replies that it's just not working out. In the 7 days that I worked there, I only spent 1 hour working with Jenny, where she talked through product and our vendors with me. How the HELL can she determine I'm not a good fit when we haven't even worked together? (I didn’t say this to her.)

I was too angry to form any words. I gathered my things, took the check and some paperwork she handed me, and left.

SO.

I'm really not sure what I can do about being fired unjustly. I wanted to throw my story out there to you all and see what you think. I'm considering writing an email to Jenny and letting her know of the many many numerous mistakes I've caught in the last week and suggesting she cleans up her payroll practices.

I'm also certain Brianna has been annoyed at me catching her mistakes even though I've been doing it graciously, and has bitched to Jenny about me. I have no doubt about this.

I guess my question is.... is there anything I can do, legally? Both in terms of being fired and in terms of their illegal payroll practices. I don't have access to Brianna's email account now, unfortunately (she was just permanently signed in on the computer I was using.) I have no proof of any conversations save for a series of incredulous texts I was sending my friends last Friday during the whole payroll training fiasco, because I thought maybe I'm completely wrong about labor practices and wanted to see what they thought. I did end up spending some time reading the laws on labor.ca.gov and I'm about 99% sure I'm right.

EDIT: I wanted to edit to include a detail I left out, which I submitted as a comment (below) regarding being puzzled by how the payroll company allows this:

i'm extremely puzzled by this too. i discussed this in person with someone close to me whom i trust completely and they said there's a chance that whoever is physically keying in the hours on the payroll company's site might just be making up the hours per day.
ahhhh i left out a detail. normally, the person in this position would be the one to directly submit payroll to the payroll company. meaning, jessie was the one who submitted payroll directly. jenny (the owner) and the bookkeeeper (who remains unnamed) decided that instead of passing on that responsibility to brianna in the interim, they'd wait until the new person was trained to give her that specific task. so, brianna has been emailing the bookkeeper the work hours for each employee, and in turn the bookkeeper submits the hours to the payroll company. again, brianna literally sends it in this format:
for pay period oct 1 - oct 15
person 1: 25 hours
person 2: 65 hours
etc

Answer:
 I think you're getting a lot of bad advice here.

Retaliation in California doesn't require reporting to the government to kick in.   As soon as you reported your concerns re overtime to Jennie and Brianna, you had protection under Labor Code 1102.5 (b).

It really couldn't hurt to file [a retaliation complaint.]
(https://www.dir.ca.gov/dlse/HowToFileRetaliationComplaint.htm)  At least it will get the violations on the DLSE's radar.