Title: GEORGIA-Son worked at fast food restaurant and was required to hug all employees each shift. I want to complain to corporate office and don't know if there is any legal ground on this.

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 I think this is textbook sexual harassment.Answer #2: >The person requiring the hugging is the General Manager, also the store is corporate owned and not a franchise. How should I proceed?

Call corporate HR and complain about sexual harassment. That should do it.Answer #3: Even if (and that's a big if) it isn't sexual harassment it could still be regular harassment.  No one has to hug anyone they don't want to.Answer #4: I mean this in the nicest possible way.  If your son is old enough to work, he's old enough to call corporate on his own behalf.  Nobody in the organization is going to speak to a parent about an employee.  They're going to ask to speak to the employee.


Title: Our landlord is choosing not to renew our lease of our Houston apartment so she can put her flood victim friends in the place. Recourse? I think we don't have a choice, but it can't hurt to ask.

Answer:
 You don't have a choice.

Also, there's nothing wrong with not renewing your lease for whatever reasons other than discriminatory ones.  I find this reason pretty plausible, and it's not discrimination.

Even if you were able to convincingly argue that this was some kind of discrimination against you, you would still not have a choice, you just might have a lawsuit afterwards to recover some money.


Title: My father asked me to go to the lawyers and sign a paper for 'enduring power of attorney' . What is this?

Question:
My father and I are on pretty good terms with no big problems in the past.  Today he asked me to sign these papers for enduring power of attorney. After light reading on google what it is I have a few questions.. He owns his own business and has some serious (in my eyes)  debt that I could not handle at all if somthing were to happen. His debt is mostly related to his business and he and his wife are in no financial trouble.
He owns a home and a bunch of work related vehicles and one personal vehicle.

Is there any risks to me for doing this?  I trust my father however...  Life happens I don't want to be stuck with any of these financial burdens.

Advice?

EDIT: I'm a Canadian citizen living in Canada.

Answer:
 Who is giving whom power of attorney in this situation?

If he is giving you power of attorney, you will not be liable for his debts, and you will be able to make certain legal and financial decisions on his behalf if he were incapacitated (the details of which should be spelled out in the power of attorney paperwork). Those decisions would have to be for his benefit, but you'd have fairly wide latitude for interpreting that.

If he is asking for enduring power of attorney over you, I can't imagine why you'd consent to that, even if it would only take effect if you were incapacitated. You should make your own incapacity plans; maybe they include your father, maybe they don't, but if he has serious financial or legal problems I can't imagine he'd be completely immune to the temptation to use your assets to solve them. You would be liable for debts he undertook in your name, unless you could show that he breached his duty to you.Answer #2: Is this a POA where you get authority once he becomes incapacitated, or is this a deal where he is appointing you POA now?

Also - you never become personally responsible for his debts unless you agree to be bound.


Title: I used a font that was free for commercial use and now the owner is sending me takedown notices [OR]

Question: I used a font that was 100% free to use for commercial and personal use and is still listed as such on the website which I had downloaded it. The owner is the verified uploader on the site and clearly states anyone can use this font for commercial purpose. I uploaded "Pass the bong!" on a design in this font and now they are sending me takedowns through the site which it was uploaded because they are against weed. But I followed all of the rules, my design is in guidelines with the site and with the commercial use policy the designer originally gave? Do I remove this or am I being scammed because they are demanding I pay them or they want to take me to court. I will remove the design but this feels as though it was some sort of bait-and-switch toward me to use their font so they can just sue me because they don't agree with WEED. Advice, pls, thanks.

Answer:
 You're asking a question relating to the terms of a license but haven't provided the text of license.

I can say you don't have to remove your design unless the license says you do.Answer #2: The font is the file itself the typeface is the display of the letters (Pass the bong part). I have tried to learn this part of the law and I have a hard time wrapping my head around it. Downvote me if I am wrong but that typeface is not protected in the US by copyright. It's similar how you can't copyright a recipe or a dress design. While they have the right to tell you to remove the font file from your computer the output they have no control over. That is why when a designer (what I do for a living) send logo designs I convert my text to outlines before output.Answer #3: I understand that you are frustrated, but you appear to have no damages.

Also, are you sure that there was nothing in the rules that allowed the designer to disallow use? On what basis are the takedown notices being issued?


Title: Traffic School Refuses to Send Proof of Completion to Courthouse

Question: I had a traffic violation appear on my driving record wrongfully after completing an online traffic school about 6 months ago in California, which caused my insurance rate to skyrocket. The traffic school sent my proof of completion to the DMV long ago and not the courthouse. The DMV says this against policy and they don't send it to the courthouse, they can only expunge it from the record upon courthouse notification. Both the traffic schools customer support representatives and their manager claim they cannot send it to the courthouse (unable to come up with a good reason) . I provided them with a link to the California courts website that states they are required to send it to the courthouse, threatened litigation if they cannot provide proof they sent it to the courthouse in 24 hours, and to report them both to the DMV and BBB. Aside from this and gathering all documentation involved.... is there anything else I can do?

Answer: Contact the court, explain that they refuse to submit documentation to the court -- if they persist in that position, the court will probably kick them off the approved list since they aren't following the court's requirements. That threat should be enough incentive to spur their compliance.


Title: Do School Speed Limit signs imply higher limit?

Question:
I'm talking about [these](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/6f/SCHOOL_SPEED_LIMIT_25_WHEN_CHILDREN_ARE_PRESENT.png).  I pass a bunch going to and from work, and I've been wondering about the implications of the conditional.

This would imply that when children aren't present the speed limit is different, right?  Because it makes no sense to put a conditional on a sign and clutter it up if the speed limit is always 25, right?

If I were coding something similar it'd look sorta like

    if children {
       limit = 25
    } else {
       limit = 25
    }

which is just bad and can be replaced with a single statement:

    limit = 25

So does the law work similarly?  And if there is an implied other limit, is there a value that's safe to guess?

Answer:
 No, not in 1989, at least. My first ticket was in a situation exactly like this. "School Zone between 7:30 - whenever. Speed Limit 25." It was 7:25 and I was doing 40. The cop tagged me. When I pulled over, i was literally in front of a sign that said "Speed Limit 40." I argued both things, that it was before school zone time so the 25 wasn't in effect yet and that I was in front of the 40 sign right at that moment. He said it was always 25 on that stretch in front of the school, the sign was just there to remind drivers to be extra cautious looking for kids (it was a high school). And that he clocked me before the speed went up to 40 which didn't take effect until you actually passed the sign.

But I did make him show me that his radar was calibrated by using the tuning forks. He told me i had the right to see that so I took it.


Title: My nephew got chased by 2 dogs on his bike. My dog ended up saving him but is now torn up really bad. Oklahoma.

Question: My dog stays with my grandparents out in the country (because I live somewhere i can't have pets atm). My grandfather shot at the dogs who chased my nephew and hurt my dog. I need to take my dog to the vet but they are all closed as it is a Sunday and they will charge extra for emergency service. How should I go about this. We can't afford the vet bills as is much less an extra fee for it being a Sunday. is there anyway to get the owner of the dogs to pay for the vet bills /should we call the Sheriffs department before we take him up to the vet. I'm sorry I have a lot of questions but me and my family have no idea how to even go about this type of situation. I'm very glad my dog was their and that he protected my nephew, but I'm really upset my dog is hurt because he's old.

Answer: Take your dog to the vet and file a police report. After that, go ask the neighbors if they'd be willing to pay. If they say no, small claims


Title: Stock option plan was looted by my former employer.

Question: I had over 8k taken from my stock option plan. The company claimed I owed the for expenses I incurred. Can a company legally take money in an ESOP held in my name? NY resident.

Answer: In general, no, unless the terms of your stock option plan specifically allowed it for some reason.


Title: [NJ] What is my responsibility as a social host in regards to guests leaving my premises while intoxicated.

Question:
I enjoy hosting parties at my house, and occasionally they can get rather large (50-100 people). I figured it would be best to know what I have to do in order to cover my ass with having intoxicated people at my house.

Let me first make a few things clear. One, I never charge anybody to come to these parties. I provide some food and drinks at no charge and often times people end up bringing their own alcohol.

Second, everyone is over the age of 21. I never have any minors at my house.

Third, I provide people a place to spend the night if they wish. I have an extra bedroom, plus multiple couches for people to sleep on. I make this very clear when hosting these events.

With that being said, I know New Jersey as especially strict rules regarding social host liability. What do I have to do in order to not be found negligent by a third party if something were to happen with a guest leaving my event?

Answer: IMHO you're one drunk driving arrest and/or accident away from an expensive legal nightmare. Make sure you have a fantastic home owners insurance policy.


Title: Need advice on cheating/possible divorce issues.

Question:
Buffalo, NY here; my brother is married, head of the household, and pays all the bills. His wife doesn't work and is a stay at home mother. They have one 14 year old son together. He recently discovered she was cheating with a family friend, multiple times, and has lied about it. He has recorded evidence of the affair, emails and text messages. He intends to leave her in the future. I want to make sure going forward that he gets past this situation with as little damage as possible. Can I get advice on how to talk to a lawyer about this, and maybe even who? If anyone happens to know of a localish lawyer who would be appropriate for this situation.
Topic:
Custody Divorce and Family

Answer:
 You would not be talking to the attorney. He can call the local bar association or ask friends for referrals.

We don't do referrals here.


Title: [MN] options beyond police and landlord for drunk loud neighbor?

Question: Both my building manager and cops have been called to deal with this guy but it still goes on.   Two weeks straight now yelling and constant throwing glass bottles down the trash chute all hours of the night.  The cops are annoyed that the management isn't willing to do anything so what can I do beyond already trying to find a new place?  This has been going on near five years.  He gets sober (or possibly back to home country?)  Not sure just greatful for a few weeks of peace but then back to the same crap.  It is subsidized housing (was told ederly and disabled when I came here, but it's not).   How do I start to get sleep for once when the normal routes do not help?  Sorry for formatting.  Mobile and sleep deprived.  Thanks

Answer: Your only options are the two you already know about - call the police, and make a complaint to the landlord.  Do this for every incident.  If it's happening ever night, call them every night.  Both the police and the landlord.  Eventually the landlord will take action when he's getting complaints from both you and the police.


Title: Local illustrator who wheat pastes art around town. My newest piece is very political and got told if I post it around town I could be jailed for terrorism.

Question: For those who don’t know wheat pasting is basically getting a large scale print of an illustration or what have you and pasting it on to walls or abandoned buildings, etc. This new piece I did is basically Ted Cruz on a dart board with Some of his quotes. My friend strongly advised me that this is very dangerous. Stating “Well here’s the thing. I think it could have a bad effect on the election. What if the right wing media picks it up and gets people to vote for ted Cruz by saying, “look at these crazed violent radical leftists?” And no matter what the cops are going to try to find you once they see it, and it wouldn’t be that hard. They’ll put in extra resources because they’ll see it as threatening the governor. Once they find out who you are they will incarcerate you, and since they will call it terrorism,They will deny you the right to see a judge. If you go free you will get thousands of death threats. I’m  almost positive that it will be seen as a terroristic threat “ what happened to freedom of expression? I don’t mean to literally go throw darts at Ted Cruz!!

Answer:
 Well, the first thing I would tell your friend is that Ted Cruz is a US Senator, not the governor.

As to whether it could be deemed a threat?  Maybe.  In the eye of the beholder.

Posting your "art" without permission of the property owner is at least trespass and possibly vandalism.Answer #2: You cannot vandalize property that is not yours. You cannot threaten a politician with violence.

Your shitty "art" will find its way on to right wing news sites and subreddits as an example of the violent left.

If you are over 18, register to vote, figure out the difference between a senator and a governor, and express your disdain for Cruz by voting against him.

People like Ted Cruz get to be Senator because people like you don't bother to vote.


Title: Would it be illegal to import a humvee to the US if you somehow got your hands on one from Afghanistan?

Answer:
 It was hard enough to get everything just right to get our regular car sent back from Germany to the states through the military.Answer #2: Importing a vehicle can be, um, interesting. First, you must verify that it meets US emissions & safety standards. then, you may have to pay customs duty. Then, you have to meet your state's requirements for registration.

[Importing a Motor Vehicle](https://www.cbp.gov/trade/basic-import-export/importing-car)


Title: Family won’t leave me alone

Question:
IM BACK.

Short version of my last post,

Abusive family kicked me out, won’t leave me alone, threatens to call police, I’m 19 and living with my boyfriend and his family.

My mom is saying she’s gonna call a welfare check on me. I’ve texted back and forth with her (admittedly on my boyfriends phone cause they cut mine off). We’ve talked in person and on the phone multiple times since she kicked me out.

I don’t want to be in contact with them at all right now, can I prevent any kind of welfare check? Can I keep my abusive family from sending the police to my boyfriends family’s house?

Answer:
 > can I prevent any kind of welfare check?

No. But you can tell the police when they do the welfare check that you are indeed well and request that they do not share your location or any other details about you with your family, other than that you are well.

*EDIT: Did not notice your stealth-edit. That's what I get for starting a thread, then going to make a sandwich, before finishing and hitting <save>. So, you are still a minor in MS. and will be until you are 21. Until then, your parents can indeed play a very, very large role in your life including requiring welfare checks.*

*EDIT #2: I am not advocating anything illegal, but it should be noted that the age of majority in LA, AR, and TN is 18, and in AL it is 19. In those states, you are a legal adult.*


Title: Banned from entering most polling places in my county

Question:
This is going to require some context.  I used to be a high school teacher, but I had an affair with a senior.  She was neither a minor nor my student at the time, but it was still a crime in my state, and I was arrested an indicted on felony charges.  Long story short, I was given deferred adjudication for my offense, rather than face actual prison time and a felony conviction.  Because of this, I do not have a conviction on my record (I hope to keep it that way), and I still have the right to vote in Tuesday's elections.

However, shortly after my initial release on bond, a police officer from the school district where I worked delivered a letter from the district effectively banning me from entering their premises, including the central office and all of their schools in the city.

So, there's the complication mentioned in my title.  The overwhelming majority of the county's polling places are in this district's schools, leaving me only a few options for voting.  I'm already assuming that there's nothing I can do about it, since the county allows registered voters to cast their ballots at any polling station, but I'm wondering if there's any off chance that I might have an argument here.

Thank you.

Answer:
 An argument for what, exactly?

Go to one of the polling places you haven’t been banned from.

Answer #2: Why are you looking for an excuse to go to a place you know you were banned from? You have the option to vote at all the polling stations that aren't on their property, use those. Answer #3:  Next year, vote by mail!


Title: Need advice to help my parents cancel a Wyndham Timeshare they got scammed into buying.

Question: They live in WI and I believe the cancelation period is only five days which they have passed. Though they have made no payments yet. Is this even possible?

Answer:
 Unless your parents are somehow mentally deficient, then they very probably signed a valid contract. That's sort of the main money maker for time shares, hoodwinking folks into buying in and then never using it. Your parents aren't the first ones to sign one of these contracts only to realize what a mistake it was a few weeks down the line.

Have you considered trying to sell it, or even pay someone to take it off your hands? You/your parents should be looking into mitigating costs more than trying to reverse that which has already occurred. The longer you/your parents wait to come to this realization, the more it will end up costing them.


Title: Charged with ovi, had a panic attack while getting pulled over.

Question:
Long story short. Me and a friend where out cruising late at night looking for some cruise routes since he is looking to get a street bike. I got pulled over because one of my headlights were out. The officer asked for my drivers license and insurance. I did not have my wallet on me with my I.d and I think that triggered a panic attack because I didn't know if I was gonna get in trouble for not having my I.D or not. So the officer gives me a piece of paper and asks me to fill out my name, date of birth and social. I did that but I was shaking and sweating already cause I was having a panic attack. My handwriting was all shaky and the officer said something about it being shaky and said hold tight. He goes back to his cruiser, comes back and asks me to step out of the car. He then tells me I'm gonna need to submit to a sobriety test. Not the arresting officer but another older officer noticed that I was shaking and sweating and asked if he needed to call an ambulance or get medical attention. I said no. I was having a panic attack and I do not recall which sobriety test he had me do first. I belive it was the walk 9 steps forward and then 9 steps back. Again I was shaking the whole time. For shaking while trying to walk in a straight-line with my heel touching my other shoe I think I did a good job. Then he asked me to hold my leg above the ground for 30 seconds, my legs were already shaking. I lift my right leg up and obviously they can see both of my legs are shaking and I'm a bigger guy and I couldn't hold my leg up for more than 28seconds. On the 28th second. I dropped my leg. Then they have me do they eye test with then pen. I don't even know if I passed that. They didn't even tell me. Then I was placed in hand cuffs and put in the back of a cop car. They asked my friend who was in the car if he had smoked Marijuana that day because the car smells like weed. He said yes. So they said that he couldn't drive my car home because he was high that day. Then they towed my car. When I arrived at the police station the officer told me that I had to piss in a bottle or my license would be suspended immediately for a year. I took the piss test. Then had to sit in a holding cell until I went to court in the am. I've never had this happen before so I really did not know what was going on in court. I didn't even know what to plead. The officer that took me from the holding cell to the court said if I didn't do anything wrong to plead not guilty. So I did. Then he took me to another judge and I got a signature bond then I got court soon.

That morning before any of this happened I took half a Xanax because I woke up having cold sweats and shaking,  these were left over from a couple years ago when I was going through my doctor trying to find the right medication for me. I don't remember if they were samples or whatever.  But no I do not have a prescription for them now.

There is no way possible that half a Xanax would have me impaired 12-14 hours later.
I did smoke weed a couple days ago so the only things that would be in my system would be Marijuana and a small amount of Xanax. I'm just gonna tell the judge the truth. They searched my car and found nothing searched me and found nothing. I had nothing illegal at all. They didn't give me a breathalyzer test either.

I'm just posting this because I don't know what to do I'm scared. All because I had a panic attack.

Answer:
 > I'm just posting this because I don't know what to do

Get a lawyer.  Review the evidence.  Decide whether to fight the charges.


Title: ISP not giving the services I'm paying for.

Question:
Currently my family is paying $159.99 a month for high speed internet, 100 Mbps download and 30 Mbps upload with 107 ping. I was promised by the supervisor I would be re routed to a new hub/switch in late march and that was said in November of 2016. What I currently get for speeds is 30 down and a pitiful .6 up. I feel like I'm getting the short end of the stick and whenever I call, the guy that was helping me is on vacation. Is there any legal action I could do at this moment in time to get what I'm paying for?

Edit: I'm in the USA, more specifically Nebraska.

Answer:
 I'm willing to bet it says "up to" 100 Mbps down/30 Mbps up somewhere in the contract, and that you're not guaranteed that speed at all times.

Escalate to his supervisor, you're not required to deal with one customer service agent.. If the guy that was helping you is always on vacation maybe he's not employed there anymore. They should have notes in their system detailing your issues.


Title: Renting month-to-month. Lease says tenant must be notified of lease changes at least 60 days in advance. Landlord wants me to sign new lease to increase rent next month, giving me less than 30 days notice.

Question:
Originally from /r/personalfinance

I started renting an apartment last year June in Florida. The landlord is a corporation in another state. The lease term was from June 1 2015 to May 30 2016. After May 30, I got no notice of lease changes, so I started paying month-to-month, as is the condition stated on the lease:

>If no changes to the lease are made, the tenant may continue renting on a month-to-month basis.

I think it took a while for the company to notice I've been renting for more than 12 months without a rent increase.

Last week I got an email with the terms of the new lease, which includes a rent hike. I have not signed it yet. The new lease's term would start September 1.

Both the current and new lease state this:

>The tenant will be notified of any new proposed lease at least 60 days before the end of the current lease.

Since I received the email with the new lease last week, it seems like they've notified me with less than 30 days notice.

Can I use this to delay the rent increase? Can I use the clause at all when negotiating?

EDIT: A bit more info about the company. They seem to have some turnover. Last year one of their property managers was fired after entering tenants' places without prior notice. He entered my place one morning without notice, saying only "Landlord" before letting himself in. Also, the person who sent the lease this year is different from last year. They also had no on-site manage for a while and gave that duty to a tenant for a while for a discounted rent. I think they have someone now who handles that, though...

Answer:
 60 days is for a unilateral change, but if both parties agree, a change can happen at any time.

So if you refuse the rent increase, they cannot legally implement it until the appropriate notice period has passed. But they might decide to just give you notice that they are not going to renew your tenancy.


Title: Not sure if HIPAA violation or just boundary issues

Question:
Hi all, one of my healthcare providers shared some info about my treatment with my father yesterday, and my preliminary research indicates it might fall in a gray area with respect to HIPAA regulations, but if possible I'd like to get more clarity on the issue. I am in Maryland, as is the treatment center that shared the information. Apologies in advance if I'm sharing too many unnecessary details here.

Some background: I am 26 years old, and I do not live with my parents. They are also not involved in any way with paying for any of my treatment; I am on my own insurance plan independent of them, and they do not pay any of my medical bills.

For the past month or so, I've been participating in an intensive outpatient treatment program for an eating disorder. The program involves individual therapy, group therapy, daily consultation with a psychiatrist, and family therapy. I have had several sessions of family therapy with my parents via phone, since they live several states away. I checked myself into this program of my own volition, and at no point was I ever a danger to myself or others, or incapable of making decisions for myself. I just recognized that I had a problem, that my physical health was declining, and that I needed professional help to get back on track.

The schedule of the program has been hard for me since the beginning—it's 12 hours a day, 7 days a week, and you are under constant supervision on a locked unit (you are sharing space with the inpatient eating disorder people, so the locks aren't necessarily to keep the outpatient people inside, though they do function that way). I have been taking more than a few unplanned days off of treatment because I'm so exhausted from the grueling schedule and the sheer amount of emotional work that's required. My insurance requires me to attend a minimum of 4 days per week in order to receive coverage for the program, and until this week I was meeting that minimum, but yesterday I took the day off again, which put me below that minimum for the week. I was fully aware of this, and fully prepared for the program to discharge me because of it. I had been having serious concerns about staying in the program, and I felt that my concerns weren't being adequately addressed by my treatment team there—and the treatment team was aware of that.

Since I had a family therapy phone session scheduled with my parents for yesterday afternoon, the family therapist had a perfectly valid reason to call my parents to let them know I wasn't there that day and we'd have to cancel the session. However, she went much further than that—she called my dad and shared lots of the above information with him. She told him I was being discharged for taking too many days off, and that I could be readmitted if I wanted to keep up my attendance.

Now, to be clear, she wasn't calling him because she was concerned for my safety. If she was concerned for my safety, she should (and could) have called my boyfriend, who she knows I live with, and whose number she has. She did not call my boyfriend at all yesterday. My boyfriend is the first emergency contact on all of my medical forms, and I also filled out a medical records release form for him, just in case. I did not sign any sort of release for my parents.

Is this a HIPAA violation? The therapist did try to call me before calling my dad, but I was asleep so I missed her calls. And again, this was not a concern-for-my-safety call. I understand that HIPAA allows for sharing of medical info with family and friends without my explicit consent if I am unavailable to consent and the sharing of info is deemed in my "best interest." But this still seems like a screw-up on her part at best, and pretty manipulative/possibly illegal behavior at worst. Not sure how it could reasonably be considered in an adult patient's "best interest" to call their parents and tell on them for not showing up to treatment.
Topic:
Healthcare Law including HIPAA

Answer:
 >I understand that HIPAA allows for sharing of medical info with family and friends without my explicit consent

That is exactly the exception under which your provider shared information. Your parents are involved in your treatment. That makes sharing information with them pretty much fair game unless you tell the provider otherwise. Answer #2: If you are in family therapy at least in part for issues relating to your eating disorder, IMO it's reasonable that information about your treatment is going to be shared, and it's reasonable that your presence in therapy signals consent.

If you want to make a fuss over it, rather than just talking to the therapist and asking them to please not do that in the future, you are free to complain to the therapist's supervisor or institution, the medical board, and HHS.   If you want to go down that road, you should be prepared to find a new therapist.

Unless you can point to monetary damages that directly resulted from this disclosure, it's very unlikely you have a viable lawsuit.


Title: Ex girlfriend wont move out

Question:
Basically I am living with this girl whom I have been in a relationship with for a while, but have recently decided to break things off because of her drinking problem. The bigger problem I have now is that all her stuff is at my place and she cant afford her own place. I have pressed her to talk to her parents but I dont think she has. It took her more than a year to find her first job and I have a feeling that she thinks she can stay at my place until shes done with school or something. I really don't wan't to kick her out on the street, but sometimes she gets pissed drunk and just tries her hardest to upset me. I have though about moving out of the country, and even giving the property to a relative just so I can unburden myself.

Aside from eviction, what other options do I have?

Answer:
 You evict her according to the rules in your location. That's it.Answer #2: You can go through the formal eviction process to get her out of your place.

You could also look into a "cash for keys" type agreement, where you and her agree to a deal (in writing) that she moves out by a certain date for x amount of money. Maybe hire a landlord-tenant lawyer to help you draft the agreement up to make sure it's legal and enforceable.


Title: Car Accident Claim - Chiro threatening felony theft charges

Question:
Hi all,

I'm in Colorado.

I'll make this as brief as possible.  I was seeing a chiropractor two years ago at a rate of $45/visit.  While seeing her, I was in a car accident with the other driver fully at fault.  I continued seeing the chiro and she went through the at-fault drivers insurance to bill me.  I recieved treatment from her for about one year with all payments delayed pending the at-fault drivers car insurance payment/settlement.  Another year passes and I finally receive my car accident settlement with the chiro's bills included in that settlement.

Here's where I have questions:
-The chiropractor has inflated her rate from $45/visit (pre-car accident) to $245/visit (post-accident).  I find this outrageous so I am offering to pay her the established rate of $45/visit.  She is refusing to negotiate at all, claiming that when I settled my claim I automatically "agreed" to her rate.  I've responded keeping my offer at $45/visit, and she's threatening to "file a theft of services felony" to the police department.

Any thoughts?  I never agreed to pay $245/visit, how can she claim that to be fair in court?

Answer:
 So I am understanding...

Say your settlement paid you 10 visits @ $240:  $2,400

From that money, you want to pay your chiro 10 visits @ $45:  $450

And then just keep the $1,950 yourself?
Answer #2: When did you become aware of this inflated billing? Were you ever shown the billing records before or during your final settlement?

As a matter of pure contract, she's in the right. She was providing you a service on specific terms: that you reimburse her for her services out of your settlement. Did the other party's insurance agree to cover all your medical expenses 100%, and to the best of your knowledge did they give you the full amount of money for all those $245/hr sessions? If so, then I think your obligated to pass it along to her. If your settlement was reduced in any way, then how much you owe her _might_ be open to negotiation.

That being said, there's more than a whiff of fraud here and it might be worth consulting with an insurance lawyer to make sure that you're not abetting it.

Oh, and to her threats: no, she can't charge you with a felony here. This is purely a civil matter and the police will not be involved.


Title: So this guy stole our menu pretty much exactly...what now

Question:
So we own a lunch business for almost 20 years now. We have been a mom and pop place. It has come to our attention that a previous customer of ours has opened up his own lunch place in a different state. HE STOLE OUR EXACT MENU! Same sandwich names, same font, same everything! The menu is laid out just like ours, he didn't even change the names of our sandwiches! He managed to change the catch phrase and the establishments name is different...and lame.
So can we do? We haven't trademarked or copyrighted anything. Never would of thought we would need too. We are going to talk to our lawyer soon, but I wanna get some reddit advice also :)

Answer:
 You own the copyright to the menu simply by creating it, you do not need to register the copyright to use it.

You can trademark the names of the sandwiches, by registering them with the USPTO.  But, he's in a different state.  To defend the trademark, you need to show customers would be confused.  With his shop in a different state, it would be difficult to show that a customer would be confused between his shop and yours.

Last thing you didn't mention, and you might already know this, you can't patent or copyright a recipe.  So even if you got him to stop using the sandwich names and menu, he could still make exactly the same sandwiches.

That being said, what are your actual losses?  Are you losing customers to his shop?  Not to be flippant, but do you sell your menus (i.e. lost revenue due to the copyright violation)?  Are you mostly just angry?


Title: Friend (19,M,) has a false rape accusation against him. He just heard that a girl who was recently quite interested in him had talked to the cops about him having "raped her"

Question:
They did have sex but he tells me it was fully consensual.

He's an African American guy and we live in a pretty run down town, we are all pretty scared and don't know what to do.
Topic:
Criminal Law

Answer:
 > Friend (19,M,) has a false rape accusation against him.

Maybe it is a false accusation, but you don't know that.

> They did have sex but he tells me it was fully consensual.

1. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't.
2. He should not have told you Jack or Squat. Very poor judgment on his part to discuss this with anyone.

> we are all pretty scared and don't know what to do

You do nothing. You have no rights nor responsibilities here and all you can do by trying to do something is to make things worse. Except for two things.

The first thing you could do is to tell him to not tell you, nor anyone else, nor the police, *anything*. No discussion whatsoever with his friends, parents, police, administrators, NO ONE. Only his criminal defense attorney.

The second thing you could do is give him money for said attorney.

Otherwise, if he wants to talk about it, hang up, walk away, etc. He is taking a tremendous risk by discussing this with people, even admitting to having sex was a foolish move on his part. Criminal defense attorney.Answer #2: Tell him not to talk to her anymore. Only person he should talk to is his lawyer. If cops show up, say nothing.


Title: My girlfriend received a sexually abusive message on Facebook, with an underage picture of herself attached to it. What legal recourse does she have?

Question:
The message: "If you zoom in you can see your nipples very nice to jerk off too"

The picture is of her in a swimsuit. It was taken years ago, and she is currently 19. She says it was from when she was in middle school.

I have blocked him and reported him to Facebook via the Messenger app, but considering the overtly sexual nature of the message and the underage picture, is there anything else we can do?

Edited for location: We are in Michigan, USA.

Answer:
 > is there anything else we can do?

Nothing more than you've already done.  There's nothing inherently unlawful about pictures of underage girls in swimwear.


Title: [CA]Being sued by "friend" who was involved in an accident in my car.

Question:
tl;dr at end.

Here's the story. A little over a year ago me and a few friends, we'll call them Arthur, Jacky and Ronald, drove up to a "look out" type spot near where I live, the type where you go up a windy road with only one lane going in each direction. On the way up I let Arthur drive my car with him and Jacky, while I drove another car with Ronald and I, when we decided to leave Jacky was driving my car down. I decided to drive ahead of them and sped off not knowing that Jacky would try to keep up. They ended up losing control and hitting another car, both ended up in the hospital. My insurance took care of everything in terms of paying off my car, paying for the other car but I never really found out about Arthur and Jacky's medical bills on if they were covered or not.

tl;dr : Friends crashed my car while I was not in it, now my friend is suing me.

Important info:
I live in California.
I had/have insurance during all this.

I guess long story short I'm just wondering is it even possible for me to get sued in any of this?

Answer:
 Not legal advice:

Of course it's possible to be sued. There are lawsuits for dumb things all the time, the question is whether or not the suit has merit. I'd give your insurance company a call and make sure they are aware you are being sued over this. I don't practice insurance law, but I believe if you (the insured) are sued as part of an accident that was covered by your insurance, they should be defending the suit.

EDIT: But you need to find out if your insurance company covered the accident given that someone who wasn't on the policy was driving the vehicle.


Title: Can an employer make you do physical tasks during interview?

Question:
Hello, I recently applied to a company as a truck driver, during the interview the manager had me move a dolly weighing roughly 100 lbs down and up some stairs

I, being inexperienced and not instructed what to do, pulled muscles in my back and arm

I went home and my father said employer's can't do that i.e. if you got hurt they are liable, etc.

Now its 3 days later and I'm still sore but nothing too bad I guess. On the legal side is everything okay in this picture or should I be taking any actions?

Answer: A potential employer can ask you to perform tasks during an interview that are required for a job to make sure you are capable of doing said task. For example if you're interviewing for an IT job, they can ask you to do so something on a computer to make sure you're not full of BS.


Title: Tenants made alterations on a duplex I'm about to buy (USA WI)

Question:
I live in Wisconsin, and about 2 weeks ago I had my offer accepted on a duplex.  The owners live out of town.  The duplex is currently  occupied by 2 guys downstairs and a single guy in the upstairs.  They have leases expiring on 2/1/16 and 9/29/15 respectively.  I'm intending on one of these units to become my own.
I had an accepted offer 5 days after my first viewing.  I setup a home inspection a few later and much to my surprise the upstairs tenant had painted over the original 1930s wood kitchen cabinets, including all the hardware.  He didn't do a very professional job to say the least.  He got paint on the tile and all over the baseboards.
We learned that this is against his lease as he did not have permission from the seller, who are technically still his landlords.  He also had a cat against his lease.
I'm angry he painted over the cabinets since the wood added a lot of charm to the apartment.
Is it more appropriate for the seller or the tenant to remedy?  should the seller start the eviction process or should I when I close at the end of may?  Do I have grounds to withhold his security deposit? Thanks for any info!

Answer:
 Until you're the landlord, you can't do anything.  The seller may or may not owe you damages, depending on your sales contract.

If this is that big of a deal to you, I'd suggest reviewing your contract with an attorney and negotiating a change with the seller.  Answer #2: I think the reason people are confused is because you did not say "between the time we made the offer, and the time we had a home inspection, the tenant painted the cabinets."

And the answer is that you can potentially back out of the purchase contract.  Talk to your realtor.

And with respect to the tenant, you are taking over the lease from the landlord, right?  As the landlord certainly have the right to spend money from the security deposit to restore the apartment to its prior condition (if the tenant does not do so.)


Title: Need help!

Question:
A month ago I was accused of stealing a phone. I was called by the cop and asked if I took it. I told him no. Then they said they would be in touch and I have heard nothing at all. My girlfriend asked me about it today and we checked to see if I had a warrant and I do. It was issued a week after the date I was accused and then there was a victim statement made another week after the warrant was issued. I didnt take the phone.
Idk what to do here. I havent been contacted by police or anything. I cant go to jail ill lose my job and everything.

Answer: You should speak to a criminal defense attorney.


Title: TX - Pulled over with many guns in the car on the way to the range.

Question:
So today me and 2 friends decide to go to the range since we had the day off. I wasn't paying attention and was driving 80ish in a 70. We got pulled over and I handed the police officer my drivers license and CHL.

He asks me where my handgun is. I tell him that one of them is in the center console. But we are on the way to the range and have a few more in the car. He asks me to show him where the rest are. I rolled down my back window showing several rifles propped up against the door. Kinda straddled by the back of my seat and the back seat.

We had 3 mosin nagants, 2 SKS, 4 AR15s, 2 hunting rifles, several handguns in the middle in handgun boxes and some in handgun bags. Also in the back seat was my friend who was sitting in the seat with 4 shotguns straddled between his legs and he had his hands on his head just cause he didnt wanna spook the officer.

I mentioned we were on the way to the range and he asked me if there were any more. I said yes and popped the trunk. He walked back to the back to see our range bags and several gun cases with even more guns.

The officer closed my trunk and walked back up to me handing me my license back and told me he was going to just give me a warning for the speeding and walked away. It was very obvious he did not want to deal with that situation and all the paperwork and just let us go.

My question is, legally if he wanted to, what could have happened? Ive tried researching it and all I can find are websites that explain what to do if pulled over while conceal carrying. All information i already know.

Answer: You're fine. Although I would recommend gun cases for next time. And honestly you're better off becoming good on a few guns than just ok on a lot. If your life is on the life you want to be familiar with the gun that's going to save it.Answer #2: You were carrying an entire arsenal of weaponry in Texas and they didn't throw you a parade?Answer #3: Can we imagine the whole situation a bit like [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtopxCjs518)?


Title: [NJ] Hosting a Show in NJ, What are the Laws Regarding Alcohol?

Question:
Hey! I think I'm in the right place but I apologise if I'm not. My band wants to host a show at a VFW and charge $5 for entry. We want to give alcohol to our friends who are over 21, and advertise it as bring your own. If underage kids come and bring their own alcohol, are we liable? We won't know everyone there.  What are our options?  Are there any resources we can follow up on?

Thank you!

Answer:
 DIYing anything involving alcohol is a real bad idea. If you want to have booze involved in your show either get some non-internet legal advice or just hire a company that already has the correct licenses.

Also, get insurance for the event. It isn't that expensive and it can save your ass in a big way.


Title: (WA) my employer lost my paycheck, says I have to pay the "stop payment" fee before they issue a new check

Question:
Waitress here. They also make us pay for walk outs or mis-priced items. We don't have a POS, just a calculator to add up items and calculate the tax. I'm new, and today I mis-priced a beer by a dollar because they didn't update the prices on our menu that we reference.

How do I get them to stop these practices, or are any of these legal? Also I just wanted to bitch cause fuck this shit.

Answer:
 I'd agree to the fee, start looking for a new job that doesn't treat you like crap, and file an unpaid wage deduction as soon as you have a new job.

http://www.lni.wa.gov/WORKPLACERIGHTS/WAGES/PAYREQ/PAYDEDUCT/DEFAULT.ASP

> They also make us pay for walk outs or mis-priced items

Do they take that out of your pay check? They can only do that if you agree to it.Answer #2: One thing I noticed here is, they make you pay for walk outs and mis-priced items?

Do they take this out from your paycheck without your consent? Because they cannot do that.

They can fire you for it, but they cannot force you to pay for walk outs and mis-priced items.


Title: Best way to put into policy "Don't be a dick."

Question:
I was a member of and have provided free professional services to a non-profit for years and always donated my time.

Because of this, I've enjoyed many benefits, such as fees being waived and not needing to strictly adhere to certain mandatory attendance. The organization has a track record of selectively applying policy to people they disagree with and waiving policy for people they like. The org and I have always had a good relationship so I've always been "good" side of the org.

A few days later, I learned that my spouse, who is still part of this organization, was told that due to some missing attendances, he will not be able to participate in an event unless he pays a $200 fee to schedule a time for an individual assessment of his abilities.

I know this is exactly the type of thing that they normally never would have enforced, but instead decided to uphold as some sort of punishment/deterrent.

This pissed me off so much. We have both spent over 10 years each volunteering for this organization.

I ended up sending them an email providing them an invoice of the emergency work I did last week, with a "Company In Good Standing" discount of 100%, bringing the total to $0.00. I followed up with saying that unfortunately, the organization no longer qualifies for this discount, and any future services will be billed.

Based on industry standard consulting rates, the amount of labor I donated was about 5x the fee they wish to impose.

I would be willing to do free work again if the organization makes things right.

I understand they have full rights to charge for whatever they want, and I understand that they have no need to waive anything. But I also have the right to no longer provide free services.

I am not asking them to change their policy (I do believe it is valid), nor am I asking to micromanage their behavior.

But this is clearly and obviously "a dick move" on their part, since they can and have waived fees in the past.

So the question is, how should I formulate my policy for "Company in Good Standing" to basically mean "don't be a dick."

Answer:
 You could try being frank...  Tell whoever sent the bill explicitly that you have been providing free labor, and if the goodwill isn't reciprocated you will take that to mean that you should start charging them for your labor.

My limited experience with non-profits is that they generally are not well organized.  Could this be someone sending the bill who isn't aware of the situation?  Do you know who sent it and is it a personal problem?  Either way, I know you are irritated, but taking the passive-aggressive approach you have is usually unhelpful.  I've found first it is better to give the benefit of the doubt.  Talk to them and explain your irritation as nicely as possible first.  If they are not understanding, then by all means, bill your time.  They will likely then reach out to you for a conversation.        Answer #2: > So the question is, how should I formulate my policy for "Company in Good Standing" to basically mean "don't be a dick."

No need to "formulate" anything.  Just charge them what you want to charge them - zero, or full, or anything in between.  You don't have to explain yourself.  Answer #3: At CompanyCo, we hold ourselves to an industry-leading standard of quality, and strive to maintain friendly relations with our customers. In order to maintain this, we try to always deal in good faith, and we expect our customers to act equally so. Falling this, we reserve the right to withdraw any discounts, deals, or other assorted agreements.


Title: [Indiana] If a powder nutrition supplement has expired, is it legal to erase the expiration date and put a new one on so it can still be sold?

Question: [deleted]

Answer:
 IANAL, but I'm a food science student and quality assurance intern.

This is almost certainly not an issue that will affect food safety, but it could affect quality and thus could be a form of food fraud if the product degrades to a point where it is no longer consistent with its labeling and advertising.

I'd say this is definitely worth reporting to the authorities. The manufacturer may have performed shelf life testing and determined that the product is stable longer than originally labeled, as someone else pointed out. It's also possible the manufacturer has no knowledge of this. There's a lot of explanations here.

Although this appears sketchy af and you're right to be concerned, there's a lot of possibilities here and it may not be anything unscrupulous but there are regulatory officials who would certainly be interested if they have not already been notified.

You can report this federally through this: https://www.safetyreporting.hhs.gov/srp2/default.aspx?sid=630c77e5-9a75-4006-8b39-89fe5f40f81d

There's also probably a state authority that would likely be more fruitful, most food regulation enforcement is on the state level. I'm at work but if I can find a resource for Indiana later I'll edit this post.

Good on you for being vigilant, the safety and quality of our nation's food depends on people like you. :)Answer #2: Contact the health department?Answer #3: Expiration dates are not usually mandatory and don't really give an accurate measure of the condition of the foodAnswer #4: Contact the supplier. Answer #5: Depends if they tested it to verify the shelf life has been extended or not. It is possibly legal if they went through the right testing procedures.


Title: [GA] My friend's restaurant has an option to buy a round of beer for the employees on the menu, but it's more fishy than that.

Question:
Essentially, no matter how many people buy this, the entire staff splits a pitcher of beer at the end of the shift The problem it's that the restaurant is making hundreds every night from this but the employees split $15 worth of beer.

Is this legal?

Answer:
 I would guess not, since it appears to be a direct "gift" to the employees, and probably is given as a replacement or supplementing of a tip.  But it's an interesting question.  Answer #2: I know some restaurants that do this and they pay out the kitchen staff the value of the "buy a round a beer" as a tip and have a free pint each after work (if they want) whether or not anyone has actually bought the round of beer thing.

Kitchen staff gets one beer but not sloshed after work, they get tips which they're not otherwise eligible, everyone's happy.


Title: [GA] Can an employer cut your pay rate for no reason?

Answer:
 Not retroactively. If you worked for a specific rate, you can be expected to be paid at that rate.

The employer can offer a new rate, and you have a few options:

- Accept the new rate, and continue working under this new rate
- Decline the new rate, quit, and
 - File for unemployment
 - Find a new job


Title: Questions about the OJ Simpson criminal trial

Question:
From a legal perspective, what were the major points of the case? What is the massive amount of evidence people refer to? What are some things the prosecution/defense did right and/or wrong? Etc

Basically anything you can remember about the case, that would help me understand this famous trial from a legal perspective. If this is not the place I will remove, just looking for some people with actual legal knowledge to help explain this trial.

Lastly, is it common for someone to win their criminal trial, then lose their civil trial?

Edit in louisiana
Topic:
Criminal Law

Answer:
 > From a legal perspective, what were the major points of the case?

Was lady who dead killed by big mean man sitting at that table.

> What is the massive amount of evidence people refer to?

"States Exhibits X" and "Defense Exhibits X"

> What are some things the prosecution/defense did right and/or wrong? Etc

They did stuff and things

> Basically anything you can remember about the case, that would help me understand this famous trial from a legal perspective. If this is not the place I will remove, just looking for some people with actual legal knowledge to help explain this trial.

[Here ya go.](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/O._J._Simpson_murder_case)

> Lastly, is it common for someone to win their criminal trial, then lose their civil trial?

Did you want me to research a specific state?  Or just go ahead and brief you on the entire U.S. case law?  Also, how far back should I go?


Title: (OR)loss prevention guards beat me and left me with cuts, bruises, and scrapes on my face, told police i was "resisting". Is this legal?

Question: I was leaving a big box home improvement store and was confronted with two large men who stopped me and told me to come with them into the store. Before I could say anything one of them said "stop resisting" and smashed my head into the sidewalk repeatedly, put me into a submission hold and handcuffed me so tightly I have marks and numbness in my hand and wrists days later. While I was walking back with one on each side they started sucker punching me in the stomach telling me I was a worthless piece of shit. I had shoplifted not more than $20 worth of goods, yet was charged with 3rd degree theft and 2nd degree disorderly conduct for being "physically and verbally combative", according to the report given to police. I heard the cops joking that they employ ufc cage fighters as security at the store. Do I have grounds to sue and/or file charges? I've seen people arrested on dv charges for much less...

Answer: You said you had less then $20 worth of goods. How much in goods do you think you would have had to steal in order to be worth the beat down you got?Answer #2: Legal? Nope. Actionable? Most likely. Will you win? Probably not. Nobody is going to believe some shithead thief, or honestly care about it.


Title: My Mom has been trying too evict a squatter from her house with no luck. What does she do next (USA-WA)?

Question:
Hi, I am trying to help my mom evict someone from her house in Washington State.  Thanks you for any help you can provide in advance!

So, my mom has been getting used by this guy living with her for a few years.  He does not pay rent, does not help out around the house, has no job, and is a dickhead.  Every friend and family member has told her this entire time that he has lived with her that he is using her and manipulating her.  However, my mom being a person with a beautiful heart has given him second chance upon second chance.  At the end of June she finally gave him a verbal eviction notice, I told her it would not work, and shocker it did not.  Then, in early August she gave him an eviction notice from the internet.  According to that notice he was supposed to be out by Sept. 2, but surprise he is still here doing nothing.  Ever since he was given this written eviction notice he seems to have gotten stranger and lazier.

What we are not sure about is what to do next?  If you have any questions just ask.

Update 1:  Thanks expatinpa for posting that link.  I wish I found it a month ago.  panic_bread brought up the point that the eviction notice given may not be the correct one (at least for WA state).  I will talk to my mom about consulting an attorney and checking the notice out.  If they say it will work we will go to the court house and get the eviction summons.  If not, we will get the correct eviction notice for him.

I wish this process was as simple as agreenbhm thought it was, it seems like this is a lot of work for evicting someone in which there is no contract of any kind...and someone who she tried really hard to help.  I will continue to read all comments and post updates on how it goes/what happens.  Thanks!

Answer:
 You go to court. I mean really.

All a standard eviction notice does is tell a person they have to be out by a certain date or you will go to court. Sounds like you're at this point.

http://accessevictions.com/landlord-tenant-law/washington-eviction-process/Answer #2: She needs to look up her local eviction laws and follow them to the letter. An eviction process can be long and complicated and can have many steps. She has to first see if the notice she gave him even courts as a legal eviction notice. If not, she will need to start all over again.


Title: Hi I'm Mia and I mean no harm

Question: I just want to know what ssn is and please dont be rude I'm only 13 and I think ssn is a legal term sorry to bother

Answer:
 Someone should mention that a social security number is something that should only be given to someone with a legitimate need to know.

Someone criminal with access to your name, address, and social security number could pretend to be you, and get you into significant theft. This is called identity theft. Never share your social security number with anyone unless you know why they need it and it's a really good, official, reason.Answer #2: As bad as it usually is to cite here Wikipedia isn't a bad option for you Mia.

Take a look [here](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_Security_number)


Title: [California] unethical question regarding vandalism and catching the perpetrator

Question: I caught someone keying my new car with photographic evidence. The damages are over $2,000 in damage. This is surely unethical, but is it legal to have them pay me under the table for the damages then report them and have them cover the damage again?

Answer:
 What  makes you think you could get paid a second time?  The person will surely tell their insurance company that you were already paid.Answer #2: No, that would be perjury. You are only entitled to the necessary money to make you whole unless a judge approves penalties and/or statutory damages. Representing you haven't been made whole when you have to a court is the very definition of perjury.

&#x200B;


Title: I found a specialized piece of equipment worth 15-20k USD, can I ask for a reward for its return?

Question:
Hey everyone, (Throwaway because duh)

&#x200B;

I was riding my bike one night and I found a specialized piece of machinery in a garbage pile at night by sheer luck several months ago (15-20k) and I've been mulling over what to do with it.
I do believe it was stolen and I do want to do the right thing and return it but I would like to get paid for it.
Would I be able to return it for 5k/X? What would the legal ramifications be? Would I get in trouble?
Should I just return it for free? Should I pour water on it and destroy it?
If I spoke to the director and charge and negotiated a reward, would that be viable?
My only concern is that they go after me believing I was the one who stole it in the first place which I didn't.
I know they probably want someone's head for this and I don't want to do the right thing and get fucked for it.
Any ideas would be really appreciated! Thank you!!
Topic:
Canada

Answer:
 So someone stole something expensive from somebody and on top of their grief for that, you want them to pay you for doing the right thing? Doesn’t sound like such a good deed - more like greedy. Answer #2: How about you just do the right thing and return the property to it's owners undamaged?

You can ask for a reward, but they aren't required to give you one. You cannot keep their property if they refuse to give you a reward, either.Answer #3: Possession of stolen property is a crime itself.Answer #4: > My only concern is that they go after me believing I was the one who stole it in the first place which I didn't.

yes, that would be my first assumptionAnswer #5: So upon finding what you believe to be stolen property in a trash pile... you take it, choose to hold onto it for a few months (already a crime in itself), while mulling/plotting how to get paid for "finding it"?

You "want to do the right thing" but are torn between returning it for free or damaging it by pouring water on it???

Give the property (in the condition you found it) to the rightful owner, like you should have done in the beginning.


Title: [California] A manager at my company took off overtime pay, and threatened to write me up if I asked to get all of my pay

Question:
I've gone to my union, and I've also gone to the labor board and filed a complaint there. I told another manager there and she did give me some of the pay i was owed but it wasnt complete, I also asked if she could give me camera evidence of when I clocked in and out, she never got back to me.

Should I go to a lawyer? Even though I've already gone to my union and labor board? Should I wait? I've never had something like this happen before, I just want the money I actually worked for, and all the lunch time and break violations he broke...

To give an example of how this was, it was over the length of about 2 months, and I was typically scheduled from 10-7. Pretty much every day I would work 30mins overtime, and since I was delivering medications, I would also sometimes get stuck in horrible traffic so I wouldnt clock out until 8:40. I then saw all of my timestamps were adjusted to exactly 7pm. Actually one time it was adjusted from 10-5:30, when I in fact worked until ~8:40. Most times, again because I was working as a driver, I wouldn't get back before my 5th hour of work, and he would also adjust that so he wouldn't have to pay me for my hour lunch. I asked him multiple times to set up a delivery schedule so that wouldn't happen, and instead he ignored that, and would just adjust it so we wouldnt get paid for going over the time. We would rarely get our 15 minute breaks, I would have to ask multiple times, and if things got too busy I just had to soldier on.

So what is my best course of action? I don't want to leave it alone for any longer and have him get away with this, because its just a silent evil that everyone who works with him just accepts...

Answer:
 You can see an attorney about taking action in a civil court, but they'll probably tell you to continue to engage through your union and the California DLSE until there are further developments that warrant taking action directly in the courts. Paying a lawyer to take action will be far more expensive than the union or California DLSE if that resolves the issues.

As for taking camera evidence, as long as your employer doesn't disallow cameras or cell phone cameras, feel free to take pictures of yourself clocking in and out.


Title: 1) How is this not blatant corruption? 2) Would they be legal to fake? 3) Even if they weren't, would it be likely that they'd be hesitant to prosecute, in order to avoid drawing attention to the issue?

Answer:
 1) it is. But that's modern American policing for you.
2) maybe.
3) they'd just find another way to harass you.


Title: My new job sent me a revised offer letter with a signifiant pay reduction.

Question:
I've never dealt with anything like this before and really at a loss as to how to go about it. I am in the United States, state of California.

After a painstakingly long on-boarding processes, I finally got hired as a Per Diem at a hospital where I did my internship 2 years ago. I don't want to give identifiers but just for context as to how big this organization is, this is one of the UC's.

When I finally received an offer letter from them about 3 weeks ago, I was thrilled to see that it was for $46.30 per hour. Then, after doing trainings and endless pre-employment screenings, they sent me an email stating:

"Attached is your revised offer letter with the corrected rate which had been mistaken for another position on your offer letter. For further questions you can call (phone #) for clarification. Please sign."

This was last Wednesday, 2 weeks after I had received the initial letter. This new offer letter has an hourly rate of $36.09 per hour. Still a decent pay rate, but wow, that's a really big mistake to leave me hanging on for two weeks. (Keep in mind this is Per Diem, so I will get 2-3 shifts per month and no benefits).

Fortunately some of my colleagues have my back since they know me from internship. They informed me that this has been an ongoing problem and that they have been demanding a pay raise for Per Diem's (and the whole department) for a long time with no results. They even contacted the Union, who got back to them with good news, but then retracted that news, saying, "we confused the position that did get a raise with your job description."

So there is this pattern emerging, our job description is almost identical to another position which gets paid significantly more.....

At this point, I have not yet signed the revised offer letter. They have sent me multiple email reminders stating the same thing, verbatim, but have not called or attempted any other contact/clarification. In the meantime I called the union to see what can be done, they have not gotten back to me yet.

So, with this context, I have two questions:
 1) Am I at risk for having the offer pulled if I push for the original rate offered?
2) Having signed the original offer and NOT the revised offer and the pay period closing today, do they have to pay me at the original rate?
And if these are not appropriate for this subreddit please let me know and I will post elsewhere.

Answer:
 > 1) Am I at risk for having the offer pulled if I push for the original rate offered?

If they decide you are too much of a pain in the ass, sure.

> 2) Having signed the original offer and NOT the revised offer and the pay period closing today, do they have to pay me at the original rate?

I'm sure there's something in the original offer (or somewhere) that clarifies your employment is "at will."  That means either party can terminate at any time.  You can consider the second offer a termination presentation you with a new offer.

If you actually worked any shifts between the first and second letters, yes, they'd have to pay you at that rate for those shifts only.


Title: Neighbor constantly harasses the block with petty reports to the county and now I have to appear in court as a result.

Question:
A little bit of background information, I'm a 19 year old college student and I've been renting at this townhouse for the past year. The lease renews in August so I took over as the sole leaseholder and found new roommates.

In the past 2+  years this neighbor has reported my apartment (and other neighbors) to the county for things like having their grass higher than 3 inches, or not having lids on their trashcans behind their house. Admittedly, we were violating the county's grass code in the past, but they could have just talked to us instead of reporting us to the county, but that's just a small aggravating detail.

The issue this time is that I had helped my friends down the street move out of their apartment on August 1st and held their couch in my backyard until they were able to move into their new place and pick up the couch. It ended up being a while because they both have very small cars and didn't have the means to pick it up. Since we had never received  warnings about having furniture outside, and our lease specifically states that we are responsible for "maintaining our property" I was unaware that it would be a problem. The neighbor reported the couch because it was an eyesore from their kitchen window and since the house has been reported numerous times before for tall grass in the past 2+ years, the inspector didn't give us a warning, instead he just issued a citation for violating a code that specifically states that "we cannot hold garbage, rubbish, trash or manure" on our property.

The citation is for $4200 because the county charges $200/day from the citation date to the date of the judicial hearing.

However, we did not technically violate the code. We did not consider the couch to be garbage, rubbish or trash. The neighbors may have, so their complaint is more valuable to the county inspector than anything I have to say after the fact (I called him and he said he can't do anything about it)

When I go to the judicial hearing what should I say? I have proof that the couch was removed by the next day that the citation was issued and in our opinion the couch wasn't trash, and we were never warned to not have a couch outside. We technically didn't violate any codes, and $4200 is a ridiculous fine to pay for just having a couch outside, when the rent for the apartment is only $1300/mo and we're all just college kids.

EDIT: A large part of the reason that this has escalated into a citation instead of a warning is due to the fact that previous tenants (from before I lived here) had also received warnings about grass and trashcan violations. The neighbor and the inspector don't care *who personally* is violating the code, but just that *this townhouse* is violating the code. This citation, received less than 1 month into the lease, is a result of built up warnings from previous years, (some of) which I had nothing to do with.

Answer:
 Sounds like "patio furniture" to me. If there is no law specifically describing what patio furniture is and you did not throw it away (meaning it wasn't trash) I don't see what leg they have to stand on. I'd do everything I could, within the law, to ruffle their feathers until the county didn't believe them anymore. Is furnish my entire patio with furniture they didn't like. Answer #2: >The neighbors may have, so their complaint is more valuable to the county inspector than anything I have to say after the fact (I called him and he said he can't do anything about it)

Could you be a little bit more specific about this conversation? Do you mean the inspector said he/she couldn't resolve it without court? that the fact that it was picked up didn't matter? or something else?Answer #3: the judge or hearing officer will ask why you couldn't move the couch inside or pressure your friends to come get it in 21 days

other than that you should say this: "I have been a responsible leaseholder and good neighbor. I nor my roommates and friends had any intent of leaving trash outside on the property. The item, the couch, is a valuable item and was unexpectedly stored outside for a longer period than intended. Further, the complainant may be guilty of abuse-of-process as he has repeatedly used the official complaint system to try to control the actions of his neighbors."Answer #4: Doesn't the fact that the couch was moved to a house and used as a couch and not moved to a dump mean that no matter what the couch looks like/condition it was in it's NOT trash, but in fact a couchAnswer #5: Grow a grass couch like this one http://imgur.com/4IYS0w1 and make his head explode


Title: [CO] Cannabis use during pregnancy; What am I looking at if I or my newborn test positive for THC after delivery?

Question:
Obviously I'm asking this because I live in a very, very decriminalized state, but it appears that the local legislation has failed to address what will happen to legal consumers of cannabis (i.e. 21+) who also happen to be pregnant or new parents. This turned into a giant wall of text, so there is a **TL;DR** at the bottom for those who don't care much for background info.

**Background**: I'm 35 years old, 28 weeks pregnant, and have been using cannabis as a sleep aid since well before I became pregnant. I'm an educated person of color, live in an upper middle class [read: "safe", "white"] area, and have one other child with my husband, who is a Medical Cannabis patient. I did not use cannabis at all during my first pregnancy.

During that pregnancy, I had nausea for about 16 weeks, but nothing like what I'm experiencing now. I also suffered from crippling insomnia (like many pregnant women, but I've also suffered from it most of my life without being pregnant) from about 24 weeks until the end. My midwives then prescribed Ambien to help me sleep, because I was going 3-4 days without sleep at a time at that point. I continued to need it until the end of my pregnancy, or I would be completely unable to sleep for any length of time.

This pregnancy, I have been suffering from debilitating nausea ([hyperemesis gravidarum](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hyperemesis_gravidarum), for those keeping track), and now that I'm starting to get much bigger, insomnia is beginning to set in in a major way.

Cannabis use has had dramatically positive effects on both of these conditions, as I take prescribed medication for my nausea but it doesn't completely solve the problem. The prescription kills the nausea, but I hardly have an appetite at all beyond that, which is where the cannabis helps. I'm able to eat nutritious meals and hold them down with no hint of nausea whatsoever. Without my prescription, I will vomit constantly to the point that I can't hold down even small sips of fluids, and will end up with burst blood vessels in my face and throat.

As for sleep, at this point, I am unable to sleep at all without using cannabis (either edibles or a vaporizer) before bed. I have chosen to forgo Ambien use in favor of cannabis this time around, because it's actually been much more effective than Ambien ever was in keeping me asleep, and I don't get that weird "Ambien hangover" that I had a lot of the time, last time

*In general, after reading up on it as much as I possibly could, I felt that cannabis was an equally safe choice as using Ambien, with fewer negative side-effects. I take full responsibility for that choice and will continue to do so.*

**The Current Dilemma**: At my first visit at my new midwifery provider's office (at approximately 20ish weeks), I disclosed my cannabis use in the interest of full transparency, assuming that it wouldn't be considered an issue due to the fact that I live in a very legal state. I was told that this is still considered highly illegal, even under the circumstances, and that the hospital will test both me and my baby upon delivery if there is suspected substance abuse. They said that CPS will be called and I will have to deal with the consequences of whatever their investigation turns up.

*For that reason, my husband and I have decided that it is probably safest for me to refrain from cannabis use for the whole of my third trimester (which I've just entered). However, I feel concerned that I will be unable to effectively mitigate the effects of stopping use, which could ultimately present a danger to my pregnancy. I have only gained 10lbs up to this point due to general lack of appetite during the day, and am afraid that not sleeping at all will severely impact fetal growth and development.*

**At this point, I really just don't know what to do. We don't want to risk any complications to this pregnancy, but also do not want our children to be taken away for any length of time.**

I have addressed these concerns with my healthcare professionals (but have since stopped mentioning cannabis use), and their only solutions involve *different* types of medications, including ones that are not necessarily still recommended for use in pregnancy (see: Zofran). I would prefer to avoid these drugs for obvious reasons, but don't know what will happen to my family if I continue cannabis use until the end.

***

So, my **questions**, for those still reading this giant wall of text, are:

1. What will happen to me and/or my baby, in Colorado (Jefferson County), if I/we test positive for THC metabolites in the hospital?

2. Will they automatically test us because of that one time I disclosed cannabis use in the midwife's office? Can I refuse to be tested without repercussions?

3. Even if they do, since cannabis possession and use is legal here, is it a crime to use it during pregnancy? What crime is it specifically?

4. If CPS is called, what recourse do I have? What can I expect? I'm assuming I would need an attorney.

***

**TL;DR** - Colorado, 35 years old, second pregnancy, have been using cannabis nightly to combat debilitating nausea and insomnia. What are the potential legal/CPS ramifications of this if I/my baby test positive for THC metabolites in the hospital after birth?

Answer: Have you talked to your doctor about an alternate way this might be treated? Let him or her tell you which presents a greater risk to the baby. Lying do your doctor is one of the dumbest things patients do.


Title: Is there grounds to contest a speeding ticket based on the fact that the officer was obviously driving distracted and therefore unable to accurately gauge my speed?

Question: (North Carolina) The officer was driving in front of me, speeding, and failing to maintain his lane. He constantly drifted over the lane divider. He eventually changed lanes in order for me to pass him and when he did so, I made certain be driving the speed limit to pass him. He immediately pulled me over and wrote me a speeding ticket.

Answer:
 Sure, but I wouldn't say this:

> The officer was driving in front of me, speeding,

Cause if he is in front of you and he is speeding, how could you come to eventually pass him unless you were speeding aswell? He may have had official reasons to speed (doesn't mean lights have to be on) but you don't (unless you do).

Otherwise I think its far to say, that you approached him, he was going erratically which is why you went to pass him and because you are not a moron, you passed him under speed limit cause only a moron would speed pass a cop. You say it was a cop the entire time, you aren't an idiot. Answer #2: His actions have no bearing on yours.

You can challenge his assessment of your speed, if you want.  However, you cannot say "He was speeding" and "I passed him at the speed limit" simultaneously.


Title: Elevator Permanently Down in 7 Story Building (WA)

Question:
This issue has frustrated me to no end, and I don't know what to do. I live in a nearly century old building in Seattle that, when I first moved in, had two functioning elevators. One is a passenger lift while the other is for freight. The passenger elevator went down for several months last year and was finally fixed in January, but less than a month after the repair it was out yet again and has been completely useless ever since. The management has essentially given up on the repair with no estimated date on when it may be working again, saying we just have to use the freight elevator instead.

That would be fine if the freight elevator actually consistently worked. But now that it's being overused due to being the only working lift, 3 out of 5 times it's completely useless, stuck at the top of the building, or totally unresponsive. I've gotten trapped inside on three different occasions when it stopped syncing with my floor and jambed the door.

The worst part is that my boyfriend is in a wheelchair and absolutely *must* use the elevator to come and go (he doesn't live with me, however, and his name isn't on the lease), and I hate the constant worry over whether we're going to A) be able to get up to my apartment at all (this is an issue since he flies in to visit all the way from Toronto and the last thing we want to do is buy a hotel room for 6 nights downtown when we could otherwise just stay at my place), B) get stuck on my floor, unable to get out.

I'm so frustrated with the CONSTANT elevator issues in this building. I rented this unit specifically because it was "accessible," and never could I have imagined that not just one but two of the elevators that were in operation when I first moved in would be out. Disabled boyfriend aside, it's still shitty for me as an able-bodied person to have to heave suitcases/furniture/laundry/etc up that many flights of stairs on a regular basis. Is there anything I can do to expedite the repair of the passenger elevator? It's been over three months since it last went out.

Answer: [How to file an ADA complaint.](http://www.ada.gov/filing_complaint.htm)


Title: Someone may have stolen my identity.

Question: I got a call from A car insurance company on December 6 that I am not even under saying someone has filed a claim against me for running a red light and hitting them in the back. I was reported to be driving the black chevy pickup that I don't even own and have ever owned. In a state (Indiana) I do not even live in anymore. I live in Florida. I told the insurance company I was not in this accident I live in Florida and have been for almost a year now. I have a completely different car and that this was not me. I got information on where it happened, what street. And the information of the car that reported everything as me. A license plate was never given of the black chevy so they do not have that on file. I contacted my insurance and let them know as well what was going on. And I will be filing a police report as soon as they open today for potential fraud. Is there anything else that I should do? This is the first time I've been through something like this so any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Answer:
 I would google the main number of the company that called you out of the blue. Call them at that number and verify you have an account. This sounds like a scam trying to get your information.

Everything they said wrong would lead you to correct them. "You had an accident in Kentucky!" "No, I live in XXX, Florida, nowhere near Kentucky."

I would also check and freeze my credit, just in case. Because if someone did steal your identity, car insurance would be the last thing they would acquire.


Title: Approved for renting a house with a no-pet policy and just got my ESA (emotional support animal) letter today. Should I tell landlord/realty company before or after I submit my deposit? I’m worried that I will be discriminated against.

Question:
I desperately need to move into this house because I have no other options and am out of town (can’t tour new properties/apply to them), and I have already been approved to live at this house. However, it clearly stated no pets and I just received my ESA letter AFTER I got approved. They are requiring a $1000 deposit (cashiers check) to be overnighted to them.

Should I tell them of my ESA letter today or after my deposit so I don’t get discriminated against? Or should I tell them before I send the deposit in case they keep the deposit but don’t allow me to move in?

I’m worried because this realty company has a yelp review stating that they tried to discriminate against someone with a service animal. I really have no other properties that I can move in to, and I need to move in by next week.

Topic:
Landlord Tenant Housing

Answer:
 Please note that an ESA IS NOT THE SAME as Service Animals/dogs.

LLs have a duty to abide by the law with respect to service animals, but there are exceptions to which the ADA or Fair Housing Act does not need to be followed if LL falls into the exceptions category.  Furthermore,  a LL has to make "reasonable accomodations" so keep this in mind.

Where is this ESA letter from?  Answer #2: Tell them as soon as possible. Springing it on people after everythings settled is generally a good way for them to dislike you. The FHA allows you to have that ESA as long as its a valid ESA and you didnt just use a letter farm to get it.Answer #3: You have to ask for a reasonable accommodation (in this case, a waiver of their no-pets policy) before you move in with your animal. So sooner is always better than later.

They may have additional paperwork requirements, including proof of animal registration (not ESA registration, just, ya know, standard "dog is chipped and what-not" registration), rabies vaccination, and other such things. Depending on locale, they may need to know species (IE, no emotional support alligators) and breed (for example, if it's a German Shepherd and their liability policy specifically excludes that breed, they can mandate you carry your own liability insurance).


Title: If my roommate goes to jail do I get evicted if we both on the lease?

Question: My roommate is on heroin and stealing our things and not paying any bills, even the one that’s in his name.  The cops have been driving around and following him a lot lately because he doesn’t have a car and has to walk to his drug dealers house so it’s bound to happen sometime or another, so when the time comes will I get evicted?

Answer: If you continue paying the entire rent and all other bills after he gets arrested, there'd likely be no cause to evict you.


Title: Neighbor put pipe on my land, but will soon sell/move out. Location in post.

Question:
State is Massachusetts.

1. Neighbor put a sump pump drainage pipe going through our land, emptying on a water source (but still, we would like the land undisturbed).

2. Neighbor is openly hostile, and malicious, petty. We are worried that even if we communicate this now, they may cause other problems for our property, so we want to know our options.

3. Our ideal "remedy" is they take the pipe out and put the new one on their land.

Questions...

4. Do we *need to* raise and resolve this with current hostile neighbor before they leave?

5. If we just wait and raise this with the new owner, does that *reduce* our chances of receiving the remedy? (I.e.: it's a case of "you should have raised this before it was sold")

Basically, I don't know if this is a situation where... if we wait until the new person owns it, it would be considered a "pre-existing condition" and now the new owner is legally entitled to having the pipe there.

Thank you to everyone who reads this.

Further aside (you don't have to read this):

I'm obviously not a lawyer, but my intuitive guess is (if I was writing the laws) I'd have the same rights and chances for the above remedy regardless of whichever owner I raise it with, but I don't know if you experts might say "well, interestingly enough, this can vary a lot between states and counties and your intuitive guess might be completely wrong..."

Answer: If this is in an incorporated area I would imagine that any buried lines/pipe would need to have a permit registered with the local government so they have an accurate ground map. If they didn't do that they should have to pay for the removal of the pipe and repair to your yard


Title: My slumlord makes me pay 100$+ in fees each month over things not in lease

Question:
I dont know where to put this but I am really in some need of help.

In February 2019, I was looking into finding a home, I own 2 pitbulls and most places wouldn't accept us. So my mother and I went halfsies on a mobile home for us to live in.

We own the home, but we have to rent the land, 525$ for just the *property* that my home is sitting on. I thought this was crazy for just a property, especially for the worst part in town, but we needed to find a place asap so we took it.

After moving in, I've been recieving notices every month. Always 100$ extra a month for the smallest weed, if we leave dog toys outside we get fined, and we also get fined for having visitors. (We have permit parking but there is no guest parking, my neighbor has received a violation because her HANDICAPPED brother, did not have a permit sticker.

This month, I have been charged 50$ for a box waiting for recycle to come by, and 50$ for a firepit that was on the property before I moved in.

Now this firepit, i have been fighting all month for my landlord to remove. I am being charged for no ash catcher over the pit.

For one, this pit has never been used, and was told that this was going to be for decoration only.

Two, there is nothing in my lease that says anything about having firepits, nor the firepit has to have an ash catcher.

When I confronted my landlord about this (we decided from now on we will only communicate through email so we have records), she stated that this is a verbal agreement, that was brought up when I signed the lease(it never was). I sent her the link to The Office of Attorney General Landlord and Tenant Manual, letting her know I know my rights and that she needs to follow, but all I have gotten is "Please dont argue with this anymore. Remove the fire pit and pay the fee."

I'm at a lost right now. I moved into a trailer, the ghetto for how cheap it is, and now I'm being forced to pay hundreds extra each month, depending how shes feeling. She has terminal cancer and the theory around the park is that she needs to pay for this somehow, and they let her pocket all the fine payments. Once she dies, her twin is taking over management, so I'm sure it's not going to be any better. I dont know how to stick up for myself when I cannot pay court costs! And I am being told she never loses, if I did take her I am most likely going to lose and end up paying everyone's side.

What's also funny is that my fiancee had a brain tumor, is currently out of state doing treatment. Whenever I personally talk to my property manager shes always asking how hes doing, brings up her own medical issues and then talks about how people need to be more understanding of issues that people can't "see." Like bitch, you give us sympathy one day then fine us out the ass when you know what were struggling with!

I'm at lost of hope. We have been showing the trailer since it's on the market now, we let the manager know and her response was "Do what you want, just remove the fire pit and pay the fines." But I'm still stuck on this lease till next february and who knows what bullshit she'll want to bring up when we have someone wanting to buy.

TL:DR/ My slumlord is charging me out the ass for things not listed on lease. I live in the slum though so I can't afford to just take her to court, as well as dealing with some major medical issues.

Answer:
 IANAL.

The usual advice along these lines is "if it's not in the lease, they can't charge you." So, all these small fines and stuff like that, tell them to pound sand.

Are there perhaps some rules in the "trailer park" that you are violating that the landlord is trying to fine you for? The landlord is responsible for those fines and is probably trying to pass that on to you. If that is the case, they still need to mention that in YOUR lease, otherwise you aren't liable for them. Again, tell them to pound sand.

Ignore any fees not outlined in your lease and keep paying exactly your rent. Get receipts for your payments and keep good records. Keep communicating via email for the record as well.

This seems a bit more complicated than a normal landlord/tenant situation because you're renting the land and not the actual trailer, so maybe this advice isn't helpful.


Title: fuck the "justice" system

Question: The idiot public defender just wants me to brand myself with a fucking felony by accepting the plea bargain. She even says that it ultimately doesn't matter whether I'm guilty or innocent or not. What I'm asking is if I tell the judge and prosecutor that I will have to suicide if this is the result ... will they will cut me some slack? It is said that they screw you hard if you get a trial, but I guess I could leave suicide for a guilty result after that anyway. Opinions and thoughts pleas. Thx.

Answer:
 > What I'm asking is if I tell the judge and prosecutor that I will have to suicide if this is the result ... will they will cut me some slack?

No.  It might get you some more attention in prison.

Your public defender is advising you on what she believes the best route to the best outcome is.  You cannot be forced to take a plea deal.  If you don't, you'll go to trial on the matter.  It sounds like your attorney doesn't think much of your chances there.


Title: PA Police officer attempting to coerce my friend into sending nude photos of herself - we don’t know what to do

Question: My friend (we’ll call her R) recently had to contact the police department in our area because she’s facing some online harassment problems regarding photos from when she was underage. Officers show up, basically say there’s not much to do but get her number and say they’ll tell her if anything changes. The one officer (we’ll call him Q) calls her without using *69 to tell her that they need to come back and take her phone for evidence. She says no but that she’ll give her account information from the platforms, they say that’s not enough and have her sign a paper saying she doesn’t require any more help from the cops. HERE’S where shit gets fucked up. Q “accidentally” texts her a blank bubble/empty text, R responds and says hey what’s up. Q freaks out and says that he could get in a ton of trouble for contacting a sex crimes victim without using *69, that he could lose a promotion or worse, and that the only way to save his skin would be for her to send him 4-5 nude photos with her face in them that nobody else has to prove that they “knew each other outside of the investigation”. He’s being persistent and unbelievably manipulative, telling her that he could lose his job for contacting her and all she needs to do is send him nude photos. Further, he’s asking her to delete the messages (she has not + has screenshots) and then asking if they can establish a friendship. To me it seems clear that this is something he has done before and he needs to be reported for abuse of power or misconduct at least, but R is scared to rock the boat. How do we deal with this?

Answer: Go to your nearest police department. Ask to speak with the Sergeant on Duty. Share your story. If at anytime Sergeant appears unprofessional, end conversation and ask to talk to a lieutenant, or Police Chief. The department might have a victim advocate, who might be able to attend the meeting. Your friend will not be rocking the boat. She will be acting with responsibility and strength.


Title: Legal ramifications of not legally divorcing

Question:
So, my SO and I have generally agreed to separate for now but, since there is no legal separation in our state (VA), there is no lawyer involved nor apparently required at this stage.  The following are the general verbal terms of our agreement:

* We will both remain in the marital home until we sell it;

* All assets earned during the marriage will be split equally (50/50) including above-mentioned proceeds from the sale of our house;

* She will have physical custody of our 2 children (ages 6 and 17) and I will have joint custody rights including visitation;

* I agree to pay child support which amounts to 50% of our children's avg. monthly expenses over the year.  This includes our oldest child's college expenses.  I will not be paying any court-ordered child support as we will keep the courts out of it for now;

* We may ultimately decide to divorce at a later date and then will go through the legal process to do that.

What are the potential downside risks of this approach and/or legal ramifications that I need to consider?

I appreciate responses that are legal advice and not relationship advice.  We are trying to work on a mutually agreeable approach on that too but still at some roadblocks.

Answer: The legal ramifications are that you remain married, and everything that comes with that. I'm not sure why anyone would want their assets and income to be entangled with another person that they have no intention of having an ongoing relationship with.Answer #2: The main concern I would have is retirement plans/social security benefits. The longer your maried the more your SO may be entitled to. Get the divorce.