`` by then i had met hassan , and for about ten years , i 'd had an obsessive crush on this brunette with blue eyes from school whom i 'd always called katherine the best and hassan played like cyrano and told me exactly how to woo her because as we know from katrina , hassan is actually quite good at that stuff , and it worked and i loved her and she loved me and it lasted for three months , until november of tenth grade , when she finally broke up with me because she said , and i am quoting directly here , that i was both 'too smart and too dumb ' for her , which marked the beginning of katherines having ridiculous , idiotic , and frequently oxymoronic reasons for breaking up with me .