even now , with all the likelihood of uncertainty , if not disaster , that hung over his situation , cori couldnt help hoping his disappearance might involve some aspect of transformation in his life , the widening of horizons thomas long may yet return , may even look and sound the same , but surely this whole experience , however it played out , wouldnt leave him unaffected , wouldnt leave him not wanting to go somewhere else , do something else , break out of his stifling existence ?