after he left , atalanta stayed there with her father , which was better than her father deserved , and the second he died she ran away and was gone 12 years , and when she came back she kept to herself , having lived events none too spectacular save for the fact that she had lived them , felt the bruises of life , felt a pulse in her veins and her heart break and reknit and prove that she was strong , that her back could bear greater things that she could have imagined .