he would insinuate himself inside the tight seal of the covers and slide down along the edge of the mattress before lying rigid and afraid that at any moment all of these things , these remembered and unforgiven hurts and fears and slights , all of these cumbersome feelings , as large and as intractable as cheap foam bolsters , that all of this baggage that they had brought to what once had been their sanctuary , that all these things would break free , overwhelm and push him from their bed .