having somehow lost more weight i checked myself on the penny scale at gathright-reed last week , 105 pounds im able to slip between bodies in the crowd , and discover james displaying a page from a spiral notebook to the throng as if it were the shroud of turin , a page scrawled over and over in pencil with a repeating set of numbers : 39 , 5 , 57 , 76 , 50 , 55 .