i wrote a poem about this love-rape which is called , the darkness , in my poetry book : my heart is beatnik flavoured and this new one , which is just about rape in general ( it 's not great poetry , it just tells a short story ) : rape , rape , rape rape , rape , rape - it 's the bowling ball between my hips ; i 'm so heavy - it 's the reason i ca n't get up , and get my own water ; or dinner ; or that thing , just over there .