a weakness joanna wakes again to an empty bed and reaches out for him reaching in the morning darkness for her husband 's body lying there beside her and feels a surge of panic when she can not find him before she again remembers he is dead he is dead he is never coming back and she thinks there will never be another there for her there in her bed she will be empty and one day they will find her lying here not breathing just staring at the ceiling the way she is now and they will shake her and prod her and call out to her but she will not rise she will not wake she will be gone .