there could be no amount of underground basement whipping , no amount of stories of embarrassing genitalia , no amount of imagined or real entire continents populated with ugly , gossiping ex-lovers , no amount of incidents with others which were so lacking in consideration that the resulting embarrassment simply for oneself sears , scarring , the whole of it replaying night after night and through each day ; so no amount of daydreams of night-terrors where a fool could be no more a fool and where the people met and spoken to must have had an experience of disgust from the meeting that destroyed part of what makes the people able to smilewhere one becomes a public picnic of attack feeding against others and self : there at least seemed that there could be no amount of any kind of such experience that would or could make any kind of change in behavior or perspective .