vanessa puts away her clothes in the little dresser and tries not to think she tries merely to be to exist without identity without consciousness here in this place it 's not a big room but it 's comfortable she feels at once at home there the way you feel sometimes the kind of dreamy hominess of a summer cottage on the shores of a familiar sea sunlight spilling through the dirty window air swimming with dust-motes drifting you can feel it on your skin .