and most certainly , he had not intended to be a strange , self-absorbed loner , chuckling to himself over a lord of the rings : visual companion book for what must have been twenty minutes , like a junky , like some drunk , like a corpse made into a zombie and walking the earth in search of somebodys brain neil told this story to levin and erwan some weeks later when erwan told them his own story , how in first year hed lost his way trying to get to class .