i should like to take a knife , though any cutting implement would doi should like to take one and excise those portions of her brain which have allowed her to absorb the mannerisms and culture all around her , to belch out sophistication from her viscera as mechanically as any other member of her clan , to remark delightfully and in a timely way on the tastiness of desserts which she would be certain to eat most daintily and with the appropriate utensils , to shiver dreadfully at the shrillness of any who dared speak an emboldened word in the presence of ears trained and attuned to humors far less bilious , to follow the procedural subroutines of her day deprived of all but the mildest of joys , hesitations , or agonies .