if one were to give up the quest to write a book of significance , there are worthwhile charities an intellectual might become involved in that offer succor to indigent beings , but as they , like all beings , will not be here for very long and all attempt to rescue ephemeral beings who will soon perish and vanish completely regardless of the assistance given to them , dispersed as smoke , seems an even more futile project than spilling ink and blood onto pages , i continue to be stabbed by the gecko and drip my blood on whatever surface it will paint .