there would be guests one who would talk about something called the prime rate and something else called the fed , one who would show viewers how they could keep their pet chows from chewing up their slippers , and one who would plug his latest movie-and none of them would realize that over in western maine there was an accident in progress ; that one of their more-or-less-loyal viewers was unable to tune in this morning because she was handcuffed to a bed less than twenty feet from her naked , dogchewed , flyblown husband .