these are societies which exist for nine months of every year mostly sufficient unto themselves , and it is considered bad form to show too much interest too soon , or in any way to indicate that one has felt more than a passing interest , so to speak investigating a new shop in a small town and attending a socially prestigious party in a large city are both activities which cause a fair amount of excitement among those likely to participate , and there are rules for both-rules which are unspoken , immutable , and strangely similar .