then he turns around and i see ... oh i ca n't believe it but it 's true , it 's really him , it 's to m gordon , why he 's in sanford is a mystery but it 's him , all right , and oh god his eyes , just like when he 's looking in for the sign with men on base , those eyes , and he smiles and says he 's a little lost , he wonders if i know a town called north berwick , how to get there , and oh god , oh my god i 'm shaking , i wo n't be able to say a word , i 'll open my mouth and nothing will come out but a little dry squeak , what dad calls a mousefart , only when i try i can speak , i sound almost normal , and i say ...