in those days it had not seemed strange to jack that the father won all his arguments with his children by use of his fists , and it had not seemed strange that his own love should go hand-in-hand with his fear : fear of the elevator game which might end in a splintering crash on any given night ; fear that his father 's bearish good humor on his day off might suddenly change to boarish bellowing and the smack of his `` good right hand '' ; and sometimes , he remembered , he had even been afraid that his father 's shadow might fall over him while he was at play .