and of course she knew why , he drew back because christine did n't want her to have any help , this was christine 's way of getting rid of her , christine 's way of getting rid of the other woman , the competition , and now the dashboard instruments really were eyes , great round unemotional eyes watching her choke to death , eyes she could only see through a glowing jitter of black dots , dots that burst and spread as ( mamma oh my dear this i 'm dying and she sees me she is alive alive alive oh mamma my god christine is alive ) arnie reached for her again .