he leaped at it , triggering the aspirator at the same time , and for an instant all his childhood belief in the medicine came back to him , the childhood medicine that could solve everything , that could make him feel better when the bigger boys roughed him up or when he was knocked over in the rush to get through the doors when school let out or when he had to sit on the edge of the tracker brothers '' vacant lot , out of the game because his mother would n't allow him to play baseball .