now you know my powers of sympathy are not great , but miss barr in her timidity reminded me so strongly of kitty , that i found my feelings easily engaged , as i imagined how it must be for miss barr and her mother , to have spent so many years with almost no one to care for them except each other , now to be summarily separated for most of the day , by the whims of a virtual stranger , to whom they were , by custom , obliged to feel gratitude .