How not to say the wrong thing (2013)
People who are suffering from trauma don't need advice. They need comfort and support.Comfort in, dump out is a simple rule that makes sense in many situations. Breast cancer is given as an example in the article.I think it breaks down in many of life's situations, though.What if the trauma is self-inflicted? At what point do those outside the ring become enablers?For example, a friend of yours refuses to learn how to manage resources. Every week is a new crisis due to running out of money or being late.At what point do you sit down with your friend and explain how their lack of planning is hurting them?Back to disease, what if the person is suffering negative health effects due to being overweight? And yet they refuse to change their junk food diet.What then? Listen, offer to do dishes and make a pot roast?Or something more likely to help the person make the connection that their health is in their own hands?