Google Please Hire Me
I don't really know about this kind of reverse applications.
Looks like the guy would work for Google just for the name.    I invested over $3,000 of my own capital to create a
    marketing campaign that would get you to notice me.
    I haven’t been that desperate to get someone to notice
    me since my first highschool crush.

Desperate? Really? What if Google calls to offer an under payed job?But, hell, marketing is a so different universe that this could really work.