Ask HN: Has anyone here turned around their life in their 40s?
You need to see a therapist.  Your problem is largely on your outlook on where you are in life.  This is not meant to be a buck up or shut up comment, it's just that you can't improve your life until you change your outlook on things.  You won't be able to move forward on things until you confront your feelings and accept your position to move out of it.To answer your question, yes.  My 30's were a mess with a divorce, a parent with dementia, a kid who had a unknown behavior problems they said was autism, and trying to keep my dad's business running all while maintaining a full time job. You can get better, but you need help doing it and have to actively accept you aren't all alone.