And I realize, I think, the way I was feeling that way, is on a really deep gut level, I was feeling a lot of shame and embarrassed, frankly, that, in some respects, I had failed at delivering what I'm genetically engineered to do.
我认识到， 我的那种种感受 都带有很深的负罪感， 我感到非常羞辱 尴尬， 坦白说 从某种角度来说， 我觉得我没有 能够完成我天生造就我应该能做的事情。