What do you mean by "growing up", in this case? Letter writer's concerns do not stem from immaturity.  I'm impressed that he's [she's?] self-aware enough to be asking a question that I'm sure is exceedingly common, but usually suppressed. Most people, like it or not, find themselves stuck by circumstance in the "quiet desperation" noted, usually because they owe too much on their house to do anything about it. Good on him if he's able to get around that.