Lewinsky - Who cares.
Health insurance - Yep, stupid statement.
Benghazi - Still theorizing for the 26th time? Maybe YOUR committee will find something.
IRS - Now you're just making it up. The investigation proved the IRS action had been equal on both sides, not preferential or prejudiced.
Doctor - You are repeating yourself.
DNC - Oh my. Are you actually a disaffected Liberal in wolfs clothing? Seems non of your business. I"m sure you'll be taking what the Alaskan GOP has said against our seated reps. They serve their constituency, not a party.

Are we comparing size though?
9/11 - Flatfooted, and likely a falseflag operation.
Iraq - Weapons of mass destruction. Not.
Surveillance - There is no domestic program. That's too much data. Mwa ha ha.
Torture and rendition -  Who? Me?
Regulation - Who cares. Let them eat cake. Or drink bottled water. Or bail out our insider banking friends.

You're a chump and the republican party likes you just the way you are. No need to change.