1. It probably depends upon one's definition of "worked."  If "results" are basically what kind of change we want to force upon the rest of the world, you're mostly correct.  However,

2. Is altering policies and approaches to be more assertive/demanding/confrontational going to have the kind of results "we" want?  Or will there be a backlash? 

To use a terrible analogy, how do you want to raise teenagers? Threats? Punishments? Force?   ...   you may get the short-term results you want, but it's probably going to bite you in the end.  (Communication lines broken, for instance)  But, if you use the carrot/stick approach, you might not get everything you want right away, but you have something to work with (e.g. communication lines are open).  

I see frustration and impatience among those who want quick results; however, throwing foreign policy into disarray may have unintended consequences.  In a nuclear world, I am mighty nervous what those may be.