Frued was a genius of his day but just as Newton does not reflect the understanding of some of what is happening.  Melanie Klein was a follower of Freud and pointed out that the theory of the Oedipus Complex was set at the age of 4-6 yrs by Freud, yet she was able to show it really first occurred in the first 8 months of life before even the time of language development.  The idea that a child has fantasies of wishing to be abused is of course ridiculous..   Abuse by parents or other adults is a horrible trauma.  It causes in the words of some "soul murder," or horrible post traumatic stress.  The Oedipus Complex is not viewed by modern professionals in the way you seem to believe.  And yes you too who have suffered great damage can indeed grow and develop into a better self.  We all can and good luck to you!