*** Momma used to say if you haven't seen this movie, skip the second paragraph, 'cause it's got some of 'dem magic spoilers ***

Maybe my inner cynic finally got to me. I've seen "Forrest Gump" about seven or eight times altogether, and these last few viewing experiences left me with a bitter taste in my mouth.

A few years ago I praised this film for being delightful, warm, inspiring, epic, etc. It was one of my top-ten favorite films. I loved it.

I watched it again last night and was struck by how smug, contrived and self-conscious it is. It's almost sickeningly sweet - it's a fantasy (as I've always said) and all the characters live their lives to suit the story. I loved the poetic justice before - now it's kind of insulting.

The character of Jenny is, story-wise, a nice addition because all fairy tales have the hero and his girl. The setup is firm because it presents her as the only girl of Forrest's life, the one person who accepts him for who he is - as she grows up and changes he's always there for her. The ending is a nice full circle. But the fact that the film kills her off is too righteous. It's like, "Hey, she did the sex, she did the drugs - SHE DIES! Who cares if she had a change of heart? She's a filthy skank!" Forrest's "Momma" is a right-wing Christian fanatical who has an obsessive hold over Forrest. She's a bit like the mother in "Bubble Boy," except in this films she's presented as a hero.

And finally we come to Tom Hanks as Forrest Gump. Last year I thought it was one of the all-time best performances in any film. Now, I can barely stand listening to him.

It's all so smug and annoyingly sweet. "Would you like a choc'-uh-lut?" You feel like slapping the guy. Then taking his darn "walkin' shoes" and throwing them in a pool of gasoline and lighting them on fire. Along with his box of chocolates.

Forrest's smug attitude is a bit too self-knowing for my tastes. It's like he's saying a big screw-you to all the people who disagree. He's Uncle Sam's Favorite American - the dumb guy who was too stoo-pid to say no to the government, and in return was awarded with millions of dollars and a happy, content life. All the Vietnam protesters were pigs, praise America.

As far as "retard" characters go, Dustin Hoffman is still my favorite. Leonardo DiCaprio in "What's Eating Gilbert Grape?" is really good, too. But Hanks' performance is just a bit too self-confident and mugging - it's too damn innocent and naive.

As I said, this used to be one of my very favorite movies. I loved it. It used to move me to tears at times. (Well, almost, anyway.) But I guess I've given my inner cynic too much room to grow - now I see it as a smug, annoying little journey through America's pop culture - with a message at its core that says, "Don't mess with America - or you'll get the Gump." America has enough blind love going already.