A reviewer here described this as "the most Micheal Bay movie Micheal Bay ever Micheal Bayed" and I couldn't agree more. I hope the haphazard nature of my review will reflect well with how haphazard the film is itself. No real story, senselessly arranged cuts that have no semblance of order, corny lines, random (albeit beautiful) international locations, mix-matched music choices, destructive car chases and explosions everywhere. I mean, EVERYWERE! Car hits a wall? Explosion. Rebar falls onto ground? Explosion. Van parks in a field? Explosion. Man falls down? EXPLOSION!

I mean look, I love Bay's action flicks and explosions but this is just too much. It gets tedious just a few minutes in. I never though I would say this but there IS such a thing as too much action in a single film. The potentially thrilling car chase for example, became inane with abnormally vast quantities of carnage and blood. The film could have done without the over-the-top parkour and corny humor that makes little sense. The score makes it hard to figure out who they were really trying to appeal to. One scene they make fun of millennial and the next, they choose music from internet memes. They try to balance this with humor that relies on repetition.

There is almost zero character building or a hint of originality. In fact, Ryan Reynolds is an almost exact duplicate of his role in Deadpool, just a little more politically correct. The rest are as characterless as they come.

The pace, is too fast. Quite like those 'XYZ in 10 minutes' YouTube videos, the flick feels like a shortened summary version of what could have been a 12 episode TV mini-series.

The only way I can explain away this spawn of a film is that either Michael Bay has lost it and gone senile way too early or this was some kind of a parody. Watch it if you have nothing else to watch and just want to see some Acton with friends and popcorn. Otherwise move on and watch something else.