Imagine you put George Clooney and Sandra Bullock in space. They're not pretending to be astronauts; they're just themselves.

In space.

Now imagine that they say things like a couple of writers who want to write bar-banter.

Here it is: Gravity!

Don't worry about hard sci-fi stuff. It's called "Gravity." That means it's about hard sci-fi stuff.

There are ways to make this work. There are ways this could have been amazing, honestly, but when you hang at the bar with your writing buddies and listen to bad ideas from producers all day long, you don't make Das Boot. You make this. (In truth, Alfonso Cuarón wrote it with his son. That's a factor).

Poorly researched. The script is garbage, and the film is poorly executed. Writing a basic two-character script shouldn't be difficult, but it is when you write like this.

CG is amazing.

Cuarón has done some good work (Children of Men; Roma). This ain't it.

So, watch this, then check out "Adrift," which gets lower ratings but is better, mostly because of the writing, acting, and directing.