While the attempts by the male leads to cover up their receding hairlines at least provided some welcome comedy value, I think three may have been too far.

Woody made the elegant choice to go with a simple "bowl cut" combover, combined with an awe-inspuring volume of make up to de-age him. Given he was playing a supposedly scary character this made sense, the genuinely terrifying hairdo more than made up for an acting performance less Cletus Kassidy and more Cletus from The Simpsons.

Stephen Graham swung for the fences with an elaborately tiered combover, starting at the back of his head but combining and curling in various places to form an exquisitely layered wave effect. Perhaps this combover was intended to convey the complexity of his character? Unfortunately his written dialogue and dodgy American accent sadly let the hair's performance down a little. I think the haircut may go on to better roles, it's young so hopefully it'll recover from this film.

Tom Hardy, who I've loved in most films he's been in and who seems like a genuinely lovely man, sported a wet look comb-forward. A subtle effort in keeping with a man who has turned in some gloriously nuanced performances over the years. I'm not sure I would have noticed it had he not been acting alongside such glaring crimes against both growing old gracefully and forehead pride.

Each of these actors have featured over the years in films and TV shows close to my heart. However, to call this film utter pap is unfair on pap. Thankfully it had a very short run time during which I was able to keep entertained by focussing on how intense the conversations between the hair stylists and the continuity team must have been from scene to scene. Must have been a long shoot for both parties and they deserve praise. Are there Oscars for hairspray application?