God, this is levels of watching paint dry. As I watch, I imagine every single character as one of those cardboard cutouts being puppeteered around.

Nobody could be vested in this plot, because there isn't one, and everyone is so unlikeable that you honestly don't care what happens.

The first half of the season is listening to a girl whine about how unfair everything is and the second half is the same but she's a woman.

Emma D'Arcy's stone-faced acting makes Kristen Stewart look dynamic. Meanwhile, Matt Smith hams it up every chance he gets--as some sort of meld between the Joker and Dr. Who. Sometimes he looks like he's about to break into a "Hello My Ragtime Gal" song and dance number using his sword as a cane. Man., he gets so tedious, but at least someone is trying not to be a mannequin? ...Like the *entire* rest of the cast.

No, just no. No.