I've always wondered how it is that tent poll action movies one after the other get such high scores. It doesn't matter if they're terrible, mediocre, or good, they always rate from the low 80s to middle 90s, no matter the quality of story or if one exists. Keeps happening over and over and I thought maybe it's because guys just love the crud out of these movies no matter the plot. I can accept that. And some of these movies are clearly just geared toward men. I can accept that too, and usually I won't bother to write a review on those, and some times won't bother to rate it 'cause clearly I'm not the intended audience. Which, does hackle me that guys will go out of their way to write and score a bad review for a movie clearly intended for women that they haven't even seen. So annoying along with immature. Women are half the population. The expectation that all should be geared toward men is ridiculous, childish and selfish when women pay for half the movie tickets. MI is clearly a movie meant for men that they want to attract a female audience for, so, all though I originally had no real interest in reviewing this, in light of looking at the female IMDB ratings for MI: Fallout and for Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again, I simply couldn't let it go. Clearly something is up. I get it, Tom Cruise is a big, rich star and his ego is invested, so, he needs high scores and reviews along with box office tickets...but, I'm compelled to say, enough is enough. There is simply no way on god's green earth that women of all ages rated MI; 5, one of the weaker of the franchise, higher than Mamma Mia:2, and by a considerable amount. Impossible. Literally impossible.

I went to see Mamma Mia:2 with a group on opening weekend on a Tuesday afternoon and the theatre was almost sold out, and entirely women, along with the theatre across the hall that was also showing MM:2. We went to talk about it afterwards and everyone loved it. Didn't think it was rocket science but fully enjoyed it. Every woman I talked to had either seen it and loved it or was going to see it and looking forward to it. I think the score MM:2 is fairly accurate. Like I said, it's very enjoyable but not like it's a great film, just fun. I saw MI:2 on Thursday night a week after it opened and the theatre was almost empty and almost all men.

My only allure to see MI:5, to be honest, was Rebecca Ferguson. I enjoyed the first two MI, but MI:3, was fairly whatever, and I had little interest in seeing 4. I've been a long time fan of Tom Cruise, but he's simply getting up there in age and he's got Bourne Identity and a ton of other action films to compete with over the years, so, I'm just less inspired to see this sort of played out franchise. Not as much as James Bond, which my dad still likes, but no one else I know. The Kingsmen had promise, but then the second one sucked. I enjoyed the first 90 minutes of MI:5 as far as a fairly pointless action movie that didn't have much plot...then, the script sort of went off the rails enough so that they couldn't fix it in the editing room and prayed that people would just not notice or get confused and think they missed something. There were 3 serious plot holes that happened within 5-10 minutes of the film at the 90 minute mark. You simply can't miss that. Well, given today's viewing audience I guess they can...or maybe just not care. That really lost it for me because it made the rest entirely pointless. Not to mention, it's all very predictable. I knew the villain from the beginning. I knew the twists before they happened. MI really does not have much more to offer. And the villain when you give it even a second to think about it makes absolutely zero sense. None of it makes any sense. I don't mean I didn't understand it, I was up to speed the whole way through, I just mean it's in no way believable.

Also, it's super dark. MI is supposed to be fun, not talking about starving populations, ending the world, etc. Why is everyone trying to be Dark Knight? Just be your own thing.

Back to my point, aside from the mediocrity of this film, which, has more going for it then Fast & Furious, just not enough anymore and super played out, is that there is no way women of all ages unanimously loved this film. It's just pointless dude action from one action moment to the next with a paper-thin plot that falls completely apart at 90 minutes. There is very little dialogue. It's basically '90s Jean-Claude Van Damme on a budget. You can sit women in front of a screen with a trace of a plot, pretty faces and singing for 90 minutes and entertain them, but you can not sit them in front of pointless action for 160 minutes and expect them to be anything but upset. Not to mention the obvious handing the torch from Michelle Monaghan to Rebecca Ferguson, aging-out at 42 and the first sign of a wrinkle is going to annoy any female audience member. Like, really, she's too old for the dude in his 50s still pretending he's jumping out of buildings? Ferguson and Monaghan literally look identical. The fact they think women are so stupid they don't know Monaghan has aged out while Tom is getting too much Botox and still going at it is just lame. Not to mention, they think that women don't notice that they've replaced Monaghan, the dutiful wife who sits home by the phone while her man saves the world, with the carbon-copy Ferguson, who fights by her man, but really still doesn't have much of an existing roll other than to look hot in tight, black outfits, occasionally punch someone, and occasionally look at the hero with a smoldering look. Gag. Can we please move on from this. Played out. Played out. Played out.

Next.