Dafoe and Pattinson do more than their share in trying to save this sinking ship, but sometimes the tide of poor storytelling is simply too strong. In defense of this film, viewers can expect to enjoy more than good acting: the dialog itself is exquisite and the technical components of the film are a marvel. With that said, any viewer with a modicum of appreciation for engaging stories and rewarding payoffs will come away feeling robbed of their time. Both films by Eggers built intrigue by way of mystery and suspense, but they differ drastically in their final result; where 'The Witch' concludes in a dark and satisfying fashion, 'The Lighthouse' simply concludes. I can only imagine the hilarity of watching any one of this film's horde of supporters explain the story with any degree of complexity. I tried desperately to enjoy this film, but its hodgepodge of scenes feigning as a story afforded me no such luxury.