I'd never thought I would write a bad review on a Rowling project, but here it is. This film sucks, period.

Maybe Rowling should remind herself where her strength lies and start writing stories again, instead of creating opportunities for the special effects guys to run wild. The story has no plot, zilch, and Joanne it's freaking boring. just throwing in some crumbs from he Harry Potter world won't save a deadbeat horse, sorry. The plot munches through side plots and introduces new characters at a speed where I periodically was at a total loss of where we were going. None of the characters or places are properly introduced, remain mere schemes throughout the film, appear, disappear, reappear, and disappear to never appear again, the majority involved in small side gigs that add nothing to the overall story, but still seem important somehow.

The music sucks too in my opinion, whilst the Harry Potter soundtrack was an epic musical master piece, this film's music is as forgettable and bland as the rest.

And don't get me started on the cast. Whoever came up with the idea to cast Jude Law as Dumbledore should be shot. Jude Law is not an actor, he's a smug-faced shallow mannequin who's made a career from looking good and from fertlising the romantic fantasies of his female fans (Hugh Grant comes to mind as an alternative, should Law be prevented for any reason next time). And this is exactly the Dumbledore he plays, nothing of the warmth, kindness, and fine humour that a Richard Harris or a Micheal Gambon brought to the role. He really has defiled the role, completely.

Ezra Klein runs around with the same silly facial expression as in the first movie, why didn't they just take a picture of him and plastered it on a cardboard cut-out, I'm sure it would have been hard to know the difference.

Finally, Johnny Depp. I loved the guy in the Pirates movies, in Chocolat, in Sleepy Hollow, as Williy Wonka, Gilbert Grape you name it, but he literally sucks in every role he's played ever since. He seems like a washed-up lazy bum today, who mumbles his way through his roles, creating the weirdest of accents and hiding behind even weirder costumes. How is the guy still cast? Producers must believe the audience are brain dead zombies who just suck-up everything that is dished out to them. Well, here's some news, we won't. If you guys want my dosh, then make sure to produce some quality work with quality actors, otherwise bye.