This movie had some fun elements. The concept of "Talented band of misfits chomps villains" is classic fun and always a crowd-pleaser if done well. Unfortunately, this movie is not done especially well. The plot isn't cohesive. There's scene. Scene. Another scene. They don't necessarily fit together. It suffers from too many trite, sarcastic lines. Less would have been more.

The best comedians opine once they've made intelligent observation, whether they're your CupO'T or not. Disrespectful snark has its place, especially against condescending snobbery, but it only improves the presentation if used sparingly, like truffle oil 🍛. At this point, however, that trope is now tiresome. So played out, yo. If one pauses to reflect on Hollywood's penchant for toileted up junior-highish, *Dumbed-Down* content, it isn't funny at all. 🚽🍷‼

⚠ rant 🔛 optional reading ➡

Talk about this crisis, and that crisis: We're in a crisis of disrespect. How many of our crisies would be ameliorated if people started to be decently respectful? Btw, it's easy with friends. The challenge is to disrespectfully disagree with all shades of other human beings. If you feel compelled to sling personal insults and mock others, your are simply a toddler. Hollywood has encouraged a contemptuous and babyish culture that blindly believes everything they FEEL is more important than facts. By this time, y'all are too much like country-clubified, pearl-clutching old bitties.

At the same time, all media (I'm now bringing video games into the woodshed) has encouraged these toddlers to work out their angst with violence and zero regard for life. Sounds awfully disrespectful, right? The specious mantra always is: 'It's of no consequence. People know the difference between real life and fantasy.' Well, isn't that a sweeping over simplification. Can we at least stipulate that the stats in reference to violence and moral decline in our society are a complex issue with a lot of subtleties?

In the history of screen entertainment, most action/war films are better than acceptable, and many are amazing, though on a long skid, thanks to Mr. Bay and the like. However, there is absolutely zero doubt that saturation of violent content peels many off the edges, degrading their sense of right and empathy. Entertainment doesn't get all the blame; they don't get most of the blame either. But Hwood's gratuitous disrespect as well as meaningless violence are a corner puzzle piece of this escalating problem.

↪ end rant↩

On the bright side, the weapon they pulled out on the yacht (controlled by the phone) was C⭕⭕L. My rating went up a point just for that.

While the flick has its moments, it ultimately falls flat under the shallow & dumbed-down directing which is, sadly, typical of Mr. Bay. Too much of what Hollywood puts out is downright insulting - the cinematic equivalent of junk food.

Take a break once in a while and cleanse the pallet with some of the fabulous and increasingly popular foreign cinema and shows available. That way you can stretch your brain a little and recover from the brain shrinking that occurs from watching movies like this, and ease the digestion at the same time. That's what I did!

IMHO... 🎬6 🤔2 🎭6 ⚡8 Age 15+

🐆