The article explores into how international law responds to the needs of families affected by war-related disappearances. Those families are torn by the hope that their relative is still alive and the need to start despite the uncertainty the mourning process. It also describes the other contradictory emotions and dilemmas to which humanitarian organisations searching for the missing and assisting the families are confronted. The law aims at preventing disappearances and at obliging the parties to the conflict to provide answers to tracing requests. The author analyzes the obstacles to the implementation of those rules. A particular emphasis is put on the growing need of families to receive not only information on the fate, but also the human remains of their beloved ones. This need is difficult to meet after many armed conflicts, but it is based upon psychological and cultural reasons. Local and international actors may also manipulate it.