depression
"Whilst I have always had a tendency towards low moods I had my first bout of real depression at the start of this summer. Until then I didn't know what depression was and how utterly hopeless and cruel an illness it is. I honestly longed for death everyday. I had been suffering with it for varying degrees for a few months when After a week of not being able to get out of bed to go to work,  I finally went to the doctor (with my mothers encouragement) 3 weeks ago and was put on Citalopram. I can honestly say that it has been and is at the moment a real life saver for me. It doesn't make me 'happy' (nor do I care - anyone with depression will no you'll settle for not depressed), what it does is take away the desperation and as others have said helps  me to cope. It makes me want to do things to improve my mood, and gives me the ability to get out of bed in the morning. It just makes me feel a bit more like my old self. Re side effects, I have put on weight on it but I had lost so much whilst depressed I think I'm just putting my old weight back on, as I now have an appetite again. The worst side effect for me is sleeping - for the first week I had dreadful insomnia and I am still waking up around 4 every night. The side effects are small fry compared to the difference it's made.  It's by no means perfect but it's got me on the road to recovery and given me the ability to do cbt, meditation and just look after myself and actually enjoy life again. I hope anyone reading this for depression gets help in some way or another for this awful illness. Remember- it won't rain forever. X"