trouble inflating tires I've watched several youtube videos on inflating bike tires. i have presta valves on mine. 

When I the top is screwed completely on it works but i'm told this is just pressurizing the inside of my pump. When I unscrew the top to open the valve, the tire doesn't inflate at all. What am I doing wrong?

After opening the valve, I put the pump on the stem and push all the way down with the switch perpendicular. In this position I can hear air coming out of the tire.

Then I put the switch up so that it's parallel to the valve and the rest of the pump piece. Then I can hear air stop leaking and it seems ready to pump. 

However, when I actually pump to put air in I can hear the air going everywhere except in my tire. What am I doing wrong?
Practice with a spare tube outside of the tyre.  You'll see it start to inflate on one or two pumps.

Could it be the pump you're using locks-on the other way?  When its clamped down you should not be able to feel air moving out the end, around the valve.

Possibly your pump is a schrader-only style?  There are wee thread-on adapters that let you use a schrader (car valve) fitting on a presta bike valve.  They also work as caps to protect the valve.