[there would be dialogue in this story:]

(I've honestly never expected to be living with a girl with a spider-like appearance. Vanessa and I first met when we were still in collage. She mostly wears dark teal clothing, her hair was purple she had fangs which were dripping with poison, 4 arms, 4 legs, and eight red eyes. I honestly had no idea she was part spider until I saw her climbing on my room's ceiling like Gohma from "Ocarina of Time". I was playing "Breath of the Wild" at the time.)