My boyfriend and I tried fisting on a whim and I feel hurt emotionally He didn't do anything that should have hurt my feelings. This issue isn't about anything he did. I don't know why but after I came, after he pulled his hand out, I burst into a mix of tears and laughter. I cried so much and I couldn't help but laugh at the absurdity of our situation -  there we were, expecting vanilla fingering, when the idea to try four fingers occurred to him (he asked for my consent ) and eventually we worked our way up to a fist, making sure to get my consent the whole time. 

Anyways, I cried and tried figuring out why. The stigma behind fisting, how it's only for 'freaks' and the women involved are supposedly loose, is so off putting. I feel like a dirty creature. For a short while after I didn't want anything near my vagina. I felt uncomfortable just having his hands near me. That subsided shortly afterwards, though. 

I guess I just need some empathy and pats on the back right now.