Looking for romances in which smart, compassionate, empathetic people make good decisions, have hot, even graphic sex, and live happily ever after A fantasy or sci-fi setting would be great, and I'd prefer the POV character to be male. 

Non-traditional romance, such as polygamy, is more than fine, if it makes the reader think.

For example, Wen Spencer's feminist "A Brother's Price" would hit all these beats, with excellent writing to boot.

My problem is that I have essentially zero experience in the romance genre, so I have no idea how much of an issue these expectations are, or where to start looking.