I don't know how many times I've failed I'm trying again, but I'd be lying if I said I have much hope. I went for 6 days until this past Saturday, and then I drank, smoked, and have been smoking since. 

I'm feeling pretty desparate, like I am incapable of quitting. Maybe I should try the gum or something this time, I've only ever tried cold turkey. 

I'm going to try to stop again, though. It's all I can do. 