Alcoholics Anonymous And Sobriety........ I guess I have a love/hate relationship with AA. I enjoy most of the people and some of the meetings. I just can't seem to get the 12 steps. After more than a decade of "in and out" of sobriety and AA, I'm beginning to think, it just may not work for me. Oh and I logged about 6 treatment centers as well.  Usually court ordered or "family ordered".  My liver enzymes are elevated and I just don't care.  I use to be a occassionally heroin user and thinking of getting back into that. Heck, maybe I can just overdose and die peacefully. Oddly enough, I was able to stop using heroin/cocaine many years ago BUT not alcohol. People praise me for that but alcohol has actually damaged my life more than narcotics. I feel like if I continue drinking I will lose my fcking mind. Even though I am only drinking 1X per week (750ml of Skol vodka), it's taking a mental toll on me. Oh well, fck my life.